714 Percussion Jokes for Rhythmic Rib-Ticklers

If you’ve landed here, it means you’re ready to drum up some laughter with the world of percussion jokes.

Not just any jokes, but the top hits.

That’s why we’ve compiled a list of the most hilarious percussion jokes.

From snare-tastic puns to rhythmical one-liners, our collection has a joke for every beat of life.

So, let’s dive into the dynamic world of percussion humor, one joke at a time.

Percussion Jokes

Percussion jokes hit a humorous note that resonates with musicians and non-musicians alike.

They’re not just about the musical instruments themselves, but also the unique culture and rhythm surrounding them.

From drummers’ ever-present battle with tempo to the age-old question of how many percussionists it takes to change a light bulb, the world of percussion offers a rich tapestry of comedic material.

Creating the perfect percussion joke involves timing, a play on words, and a deep understanding of the idiosyncrasies of percussion instruments and their players (like the ubiquitous stick drops or the eternal quest for the perfect drum solo).

Ready to roll on the floor laughing?

Let’s drum up some fun with these percussion jokes:

• Why did the drummer bring a map to their gig? They didn’t want to miss a beat!
• Why did the snare drum go to school? To get its “rhythm-atic” education!
• What’s a percussionist’s favorite type of cookie? Snare-o-las.
• Why couldn’t the percussionist find his drumsticks? Because he had a bad case of “band”-aid!
• What do you call a drummer with half a brain? Gifted, because drumming only requires rhythm!
• What do you call a drummer who can’t keep a steady rhythm? A complete snare-case!
• Why did the cymbal refuse to play with the other percussion instruments? Because it didn’t want to get caught up in the “crash”!
• What did the cymbal say to the snare drum? “You always make such a big crash, you should try being more subtle like me!”
• Why did the percussionist go broke? Because they spent all their money on cymbals, drumsticks, and other crash investments!
• Why did the percussionist bring a dictionary to the gig? To look up all the beats he didn’t know how to play!
• Why don’t percussionists ever get married? They’re always too busy banging on things!
• What did the percussionist say when they won the lottery? “I’ll finally be able to afford more cowbell!”
• What did the percussionist say when someone asked him to stop drumming? “I can’t quit, it’s just snare-ly impossible!”
• Why did the percussionist get kicked out of the band? He couldn’t “drum” up enough enthusiasm for rehearsals!
• What do you call a drummer with half a brain? Gifted… because they can still keep the beat with just one drumstick!
• Why did the drummer get kicked out of the orchestra? They couldn’t stop drumming up trouble.
• Why did the drum hire a personal trainer? To work on its “hi-hat-bics”!
• What do you call a drummer without a girlfriend? Homeless, because he can’t find a “bae” to stay with!
• Why did the cymbal refuse to join the band? It was afraid of crashing the party.
• Why was the drum major always tired? Because he was always marching to the beat of his own drum!
• Why did the percussionist always carry a pair of drumsticks? In case of an emergency drum solo!
• Why did the percussionist bring a tree to the concert? They wanted to play some “bass” drum!
• Why did the percussionist bring a parrot to the concert? Because he wanted someone who could really keep a good beat!
• Why did the percussionist bring his drumsticks to the barbecue? Because he wanted to beat the heat!
• Why did the drummer bring a pair of drumsticks to the dentist? He wanted to brush up on his fillings!
• Why did the percussionist bring a map to the concert? In case they needed to find their way around the drum set!
• What’s a percussionist’s favorite type of music? Heavy metal, because they get to hit things really hard!
• Why did the drummer get kicked out of the band? He couldn’t keep the beat… he just kept snacking on them!
• What did the drummer say to their snare drum? “I’m sorry, but I can’t beat this relationship anymore!”
• What’s a drum’s favorite type of clothing? Cymballero!
• What do you call a drummer who has no sense of rhythm? A “beat”nik!
• Why did the percussionist become a chef? Because they loved beating the eggs and whipping up some beats!
• How did the drummer communicate with the aliens? He used his snare drum because they all spoke inter-galact-snare!
• Why did the percussionist become a doctor? Because he wanted to give people a healthy dose of beats!
• Why did the drummer bring a drumstick to the restaurant? To drum up some business, of course!
• Why was the percussionist always broke? Because he couldn’t resist the urge to “snare” a good deal!
• What did the drum say to the cymbals? “You guys really know how to make a big crash!”
• Why did the drummer get kicked out of the marching band? Because he couldn’t control his snare attitude!
• What’s a drummer’s favorite dessert? Beats and rolls!
• Why did the drummer bring a towel to the gig? Because he wanted to “snare” the sweat away!
• Why did the drummer go to jail? Because he couldn’t keep a steady beat… he was always behind bars!
• What did the drummer say to the rest of the band? “Let’s hit it and not quit it!”
• Why did the drummer join a yoga class? Because he wanted to find his inner beat!
• Why did the snare drum take a break? It needed to rest its hi-hat!
• Why did the percussionist become a gardener? Because they loved playing with pots and pans!
• What did the drummer say when he locked himself out of the rehearsal studio? “I guess I’ll just have to “percuss” my way through the door!”
• Why did the snare drum take up yoga? It needed to find its inner beat.
• What do you call a drummer who just broke up with his girlfriend? Homeless, because he lost his sticks and has no place to crash!
• Why did the percussionist join a gym? Because they wanted to work on their “hi-hat”ness!
• Why did the xylophone player get in trouble with the conductor? They couldn’t resist adding a little extra xylo-‘fun’ to the music.
• What did the percussionist say when he couldn’t find his metronome? “I guess I’ll just have to “beat” time on my own!”
• Why do drummers always bring extra sticks to their gigs? Because they know they’ll be dropping a lot of beats!
• Why did the percussionist take up boxing? Because he wanted to practice his drum-rolls and beats on a different kind of pads!
• Why did the drummer bring a map to their gig? Because they always like to find the perfect beat!
• What’s a drummer’s favorite type of clothing? Cymbals! They always make a fashion statement!
• How do drummers communicate? They use “cymbalism”!
• Why did the percussionist get arrested? Because they were caught drumming up trouble!
• What’s a percussionist’s favorite clothing brand? Beats by Dre (Dress).
• Why was the drumhead a great comedian? It always had a snare in its jokes!
• Why did the marimba player go broke? They spent all their money on xylophones!
• Why did the percussionist get hired as a chef? Because they could really pound the meat and beat the eggs!
• How do you know if a drummer is at your front door? The knocking gets progressively faster and louder!
• Why did the drummer join a cooking class? Because he heard they were going to learn how to beat eggs!
• Why was the percussionist always out of money? Because they couldn’t resist the urge to snare some extra cash!
• Why was the math book always drumming? Because it had a lot of problems to solve!
• Why did the drummer join a hair salon? Because he heard they were experts in giving good bangs!
• Why did the cymbal never get invited to parties? Because it was always crashing the conversation!
• Why did the percussionist bring a parrot to the concert? Because he wanted a drum set with a high “caw”lity!
• Why did the percussionist get into trouble at school? He was always “banging” on the desk during class!
• Why did the percussionist bring a hairdryer to their gig? In case they needed to add some snare to their performance!
• How do drummers celebrate their birthdays? With a paradiddle cake and a crash-cymbal toast!
• What do you call a drum that fell off the stage? A beat drop!
• What’s the difference between a drum solo and a flat tire? One is a breakdown on stage, the other is a breakdown on the road!
• Why did the percussionist always have bad luck? They kept running into treble, but couldn’t find the bass!
• Why did the drummer start playing the piano? Because they wanted to tap into a new instrument!
• What’s a percussionist’s favorite type of pasta? Rhythm-aroni!
• What did the drum say to the percussionist? “Quit bongo-ing on about it!”
• Why did the percussionist refuse to play with the other musicians? He had a bad case of rhythm and blues.
• Why did the percussionist wear earplugs? To block out all the cymbalism around him!
• How many drummers does it take to change a light bulb? Five – one to screw it in, and four to say, “I could do that better!”
• What did the percussionist say when his friend asked for a loan? “Sorry, I don’t have any money, all my cash went into buying more cowbells!”
• Why did the percussionist become a stand-up comedian? Because he knew how to drum up laughter in the crowd!
• Why did the cymbal get arrested? Because it was involved in a “slash” and crash incident!
• Why did the percussionist bring a map to the concert? Because they heard they would be playing some sick beats!
• Why do percussionists make great comedians? Because they always know how to drum up laughter!
• What do you call a drummer who can’t keep time? A procrastinating percussionist.
• Why did the percussionist get a job at the bakery? Because he wanted to make some “dough” on the side!
• What did the percussionist say when they won the lottery? “I’m going to buy a whole drum set, and I mean business!”
• Why did the percussionist get in trouble at school? They couldn’t resist hitting the desks and causing a real cymbal-ance!
• Why did the drummer get arrested? For beating up the bass player with too many drum fills!
• Why did the percussionist join a band that plays in the forest? Because they wanted to be a tree-molo player!
• Why did the drummer go broke? Because he couldn’t stop spending all his money on cymbals!
• What did the drummer say to the impatient conductor? “Can we speed things up? I’m ready to “snare” the moment!”
• Why did the drummer go to the bank? To get his hi-hat account in order!
• Why did the percussionist start a gardening hobby? Because he wanted to see if he could drum up some beet!
• Why was the percussionist always happy? Because they had a drum-tastic life rhythm!
• Why did the percussionist bring a map to the concert? Because they were afraid of getting lost in the beat!
• Why did the drummer go broke? Because they spent all their money on drumsticks and cymbals, and couldn’t find a gig!
• What do you call a drummer who just broke up with their girlfriend? Homeless, because they can’t find the beat!
• What’s the difference between a drummer and a savings account? Eventually, the savings account will start earning interest!
• What did the snare drum say to the hi-hat? Cymbal you later!
• What’s a percussionist’s favorite type of vacation? A “snare”-away!
• Why was the percussionist always out of breath? Because they couldn’t find the right tempo and had to keep drumming it up!
• What did the drummer say after getting hit by a cymbal? “I didn’t see that crash coming!”
• Why did the percussionist bring a map to the concert? They didn’t want to get lost in the rhythm section.
• Why did the cymbal player become a teacher? He wanted to make sure his students really knew how to crash and burn!
• Why did the cow become a percussionist? Because it had a lot of mooves to express through beats!
• What’s a drummer’s favorite type of footwear? Cymbal-oes!
• What do you call a drummer who has lost their girlfriend? Homeless!
• Why did the snare drum go to school? To get a little extra “hit”ory education!
• What did the snare drum say to the bass drum? “Nice beats you got there, buddy!”
• What’s a drummer’s favorite part of a song? The rest symbol.
• Why did the percussionist join a cooking class? Because he wanted to learn how to beat eggs like he beats his drums!
• Why did the percussionist refuse to play on a broken drum set? Because it was just “unbeatable”!
• Why did the drum kit go to school? It wanted to get into a good band program!
• Why did the snare drum go to school? It wanted to get an education in rhythm and drum-atics!
• Why did the drummer bring a map to the gig? In case he needed to “snare” his way out of a tricky situation!
• Why did the snare drum join a gym? It wanted to tone its abs and get a little more snare-y!
• Why did the percussionist go broke? Because they kept dropping the beats!
• Why did the percussionist bring his drum to the bakery? Because he wanted to make some “sweet beats”!
• What did the drummer say to the band director? “When I play the cymbals, I’m really going to make some noise!”
• Why did the percussionist become a chef? Because they knew how to handle the chopsticks!
• Why did the drummer start wearing two watches? Because he wanted to keep perfect time and half past perfect time!
• What’s a percussionist’s favorite kind of car? A “Rim-shot”!
• Why did the cymbal end up in jail? It was arrested for making too much noise!
• Why did the drummer put their drumsticks in the freezer? They wanted to play cool beats!
• What did the snare drum say to the cymbal? “You’re making too much noise, please crash elsewhere!”
• Why was the drumming octopus so popular? Because it knew how to hit all the right beats!
• What did the percussionist say to the nosy neighbor? “Don’t bongo where you’re not congo!”
• Why did the drummer become a gardener? Because they had a natural talent for planting beats!
• Why did the percussionist always carry a pair of drumsticks? In case he needed to “stick” up for himself!
• Why did the drummer get kicked out of the band? Because they couldn’t handle the beat!
• Why don’t drummers ever run out of money? Because they can always count on their hi-hat!
• How many drummers does it take to change a lightbulb? Just one, but they’ll break ten bulbs before they find the right one!
• Why did the percussionist become a chef? Because they loved adding some “bass” to their dishes!

 

Short Percussion Jokes

Short percussion jokes are like a precise drum roll—quick, impactful, and always on beat.

These jokes are perfect for text messages, social media captions, or that moment in a band practice when you need to lighten up the mood.

The beauty of short percussion jokes lies in their ability to deliver rhythm and humor together, creating a beat of laughter in just a few words.

And now, drum roll, please!

Here are short percussion jokes that hit the funny note perfectly in just a few words.

• Why did the tambourine go to therapy? It had issues with clapping.
• What’s the fastest percussion instrument? The hi-hat, it always beats!
• Why did the drummer go broke? Because he had no cents!
• What’s a drummer’s favorite type of tree? A snare-oak!
• What’s a drummer’s favorite type of music? Heavy metal, of course!
• Why don’t drummers have spare change? They always break it!
• What kind of percussion instrument gets out of breath? A snare drum!
• Why was the drum so good at math? It had perfect timing!
• Why was the drumming robot so popular? He had great rhythm-algorithms!
• What did the drummer say to the percussionist? Let’s beat it together!
• What’s a drummer’s favorite type of vehicle? A drum-roll!
• Why don’t drummers go on summer vacations? They like to beat it!
• What’s a drummer’s favorite kind of car? A “Rim”my Martin!
• Why did the drum take a break? It needed a little R&Rhythm!
• Why did the percussionist wear headphones? To cancel out the noise complaints!
• What’s a drummer’s favorite kind of sandwich? A sub beat!
• What do you call a drumming rabbit? A snare hare!
• Why did the cymbal take a break? It needed to crash!
• How do you make a drummer’s car faster? Take away the sticks!
• Why did the snare drum become a comedian? It had great rimshots!
• What’s a drummer’s favorite plant? The hi-hat tree!
• What did the drummer call his twin sons? Tom and Snare!
• What’s a drummer’s favorite type of coffee? A double cymbal shot!
• Why was the percussionist so good at math? They knew their beats!
• What’s a drummer’s favorite type of exercise? The drum roll!
• What did the drummer say when he got a gig? “I’m drum-struck!”
• Why did the drummer join the circus? He loved the snare drum-roll!
• What’s a drum’s favorite kind of music? Heavy metal!
• Why don’t skeletons play percussion instruments? They don’t have the guts!
• What’s a drummer’s favorite kind of music? Anything with a good beat!
• What’s a drummer’s favorite type of cookie? Snickerdoodle-drum.
• What’s a drummer’s favorite type of coffee? A “cymbal”-t of Joe!
• Why did the maraca go to the party? For a good shake.
• What’s a drummer’s favorite exercise? Drum-ercise!
• Why did the percussionist become a gardener? He loved playing “plant”-os!
• What’s a percussionist’s favorite type of shoe? Clogs.
• How do drummers stay in shape? They have good “hi-hat” habits!
• Why did the percussionist start a bakery? They loved to make rolls!
• Why did the percussionist become a doctor? To cure the beat!
• What’s a drum’s favorite type of food? Bangers and mash!
• Why did the drummer get arrested? For drumming up trouble!
• Why did the tambourine go to school? To get some rhythm education!
• Why did the cymbal crash? It was in suspense!
• Why did the percussionist wear sunglasses? Because they drum in the spotlight!
• Why did the drummer lose their job? They couldn’t keep the rhythm.
• What’s a drummer’s favorite dance move? The cymbal shimmy!
• Why did the drummer lose his job? He couldn’t keep a beat!
• What’s a drummer’s favorite kind of clothing? Cymbal-t!

 

Percussion Jokes One-Liners

Percussion jokes one-liners are the rhythm of humor confined within a single line.

They’re the verbal counterpart of striking a drum in perfect tempo – thrilling, neat, and effortlessly snappy.

Creating a great one-liner demands a fusion of imagination, accuracy, and an intense love for the play on words.

The real test is to envelop the setup and punchline in a succinct form, providing maximum humor with minimum words.

Here’s to these percussion one-liners resonating with your laughter chords:

• Why did the drummer bring a calculator to rehearsal? Because he wanted to drum up some numbers!
• Why did the drummer wear two jackets to the gig? In case he needed a “double-bass” layer!
• Why did the percussionist join a circus? He wanted to be the ultimate drum roll performer!
• What’s a percussionist’s favorite type of pie? Drumstick pie, of course!
• What do you call a drummer who has no rhythm? An unemployed tambourine player.
• Why did the xylophone player get arrested? He couldn’t keep his sticks to himself – he was always hitting on someone!
• Why did the percussionist become a doctor? Because they had a great sense of rhythm and knew how to beat the pulse!
• What’s the difference between a drummer and a philosopher? One bangs on drums, and the other drums on bangs.
• Why did the percussionist start a garden? Because he wanted to grow some sick beats!
• Why did the percussionist always carry around a tuning fork? They didn’t trust the bassist’s sense of pitch!
• What’s a percussionist’s favorite type of workout? Drum-“stick”ercise!
• Why did the tambourine go to school? It wanted to learn how to shake things up!
• Why did the drum set become a detective? It was great at keeping a beat on the street!
• Why was the percussionist always late for rehearsals? Because he had a snare drum phobia!
• How do percussionists deal with stress? They just drum up some positive vibes!
• What do you call a drum that’s on fire? A hot beat!
• Why couldn’t the drummer find his drumsticks? Because he always misplace them beat after beat.
• What’s a drummer’s favorite type of car? A Rhythm-obile!
• Why did the drummer bring sticks to the restaurant? In case they needed to beat the rush!
• What’s a drummer’s favorite exercise? Playing the air drums!
• Why did the snare drum get a promotion? It had excellent “snare-ential” skills.
• Why did the drummer cross the road? To prove they had rhythm on both sides.
• Why did the drummer go to jail? He was caught playing beat the rap!
• What’s a percussionist’s favorite type of computer? A Dell, because it has a drum!
• Why did the percussionist go broke? Because he couldn’t find his groove and kept losing his bass!
• Why did the percussionist become a detective? They had a knack for solving drum-related mysteries – they always found the beat!
• Why did the percussionist fail their math test? Because they couldn’t count past four!
• Why did the drummer bring a pair of drumsticks to the restaurant? He wanted to “fork” up the beat!
• I asked my drumsticks if they were angry with me, but they didn’t say a word. They were quite cymbal-tic!
• Why did the tambourine want to be a comedian? It wanted to bring the funniest “rimshot” to every joke!
• What did the snare drum say to the cymbal? “You’re always crashing my parties!”
• Why did the snare drum become a stand-up comedian? It had such good timing for delivering punch lines!
• Why did the snare drum break up with the hi-hat? They just couldn’t find a good rhythm together.
• Why did the percussionist start a bakery? Because they wanted to make some dough with their drum rolls!
• Why did the percussionist start a gardening business? Because they knew how to make things grow with a beat!
• What do you call a snobbish drummer? A beatnik.
• Why was the percussionist always the life of the party? They knew how to make a real “banging” entrance.
• Why did the drummer bring a pair of earplugs to the concert? Because he didn’t want to cymbal-lize on his hearing!
• Why did the drummer become a chef? Because he loved the “beats” and “meat” the most!
• Why did the drummer break up with his girlfriend? She kept hitting on other guys.
• Why do drummers have trouble keeping a steady job? They’re always getting caught up in the snare!
• What did the drum set say when it won the lottery? “I’m going to buy some cymbals and snare the moment!”
• Why did the percussionist bring a towel to the gig? So he could dry off his hi-hats after a cymbal-storm!
• What did the percussionist say when he couldn’t find his drumsticks? “I guess I’ll just have to use my noodle and play with spaghetti!”
• Why did the percussionist become a chef? Because he loved adding a little extra spice to his beats!
• What do you call a drummer that loses all their rhythm? A snare loser!
• Why did the cow try out for the percussion band? Because it had a good moo-sical ear!
• What did the snare drum say to the hi-hat? “I cymbalieve we make a great pair!”
• What did the drummer say after a successful gig? “That was a real hi-hat trick!”
• What’s a percussionist’s favorite type of sandwich? Drum roll, please… a bongo wrap!
• Why was the percussionist always running late? They had too many beats to catch!
• Why did the maracas go to therapy? They were tired of feeling shaken all the time!
• Why did the snare drum go to jail? It was caught up in a hi-hat crime spree!
• What did the snare drum say to the cymbals? “You two make such a great crash!”
• What did the percussionist say when he got a job playing in a symphony orchestra? “I finally found my cymbal-istic calling!”
• Why did the percussionist start a gardening business? Because they had a knack for beating the plants!
• Why was the drum set always getting into trouble? Because it had too many cymbals!
• Why did the percussionist take up gardening? Because he wanted to drum up some beats!
• What’s a drummer’s favorite type of shoe? The ones with good sole for stomping on the bass drum!
• Why did the percussionist get arrested? He couldn’t keep his hi-hats out of trouble.
• What do you call a drummer who breaks up with their significant other? A free agent, they’re back on the market for drumming up a new relationship!
• Why did the percussionist bring a parachute to the concert? Because he liked to make a grand entrance with a crash landing!
• Why did the cymbal crash into the wall? Because it didn’t see the drum set!
• Why did the drummer join a circus? Because he wanted to be the drum major attraction.
• I asked my friend why they became a percussionist, and they said it was the only way they could legally hit things without getting in trouble.
• Why did the drum set join a gym? It wanted to work on its hi-hat!
• Why did the drum set enroll in college? It wanted to major in crash cymbals.
• What did the percussionist say to the singer? “Stop drumming up trouble!”
• Why did the percussionist start a vegetable garden? They wanted to grow their own beats!
• Why did the drummer get fired as a chef? They kept losing the thyme while trying to keep the beat.
• Why did the percussionist join a band? They couldn’t resist the sound of opportunity knocking.
• What did the percussionist say to the drummer who kept dropping their sticks? “You need to stick with it, buddy!”
• Why did the percussionist join a cooking class? He wanted to learn how to drum up some tasty beats!
• Why did the percussionist become a chef? They wanted to make some sick beats in the kitchen with their whisk and pans!
• Why did the percussionist go to jail? He couldn’t keep his hands off the bongos!
• Why do drummers always seem to be in a hurry? They’re always trying to beat the clock.
• Why was the percussionist arrested? Because he was caught drumming up trouble.
• What did the drummer say to the singer? “Can you give me a hand with this rhythm?” .
• Why did the percussionist bring an umbrella to the concert? In case of hi-hat and cymbal showers!
• Why was the percussionist always broke? Because they couldn’t find steady beat.
• What do you call a percussionist without a girlfriend? Homeless, because he can’t afford a crash pad!
• What is a drummer’s favorite type of clothing? Cymbal-tique!
• What’s a percussionist’s favorite type of clothing? Cymbal-tics!
• Why did the drummer go to jail? He got caught “hi-hat”-ing his drum set!
• I told my percussionist friend that they should audition for a jazz band. They replied, “Nah, I’m just not cymbal-minded.”
• Why did the snare drum refuse to play? It was tired of being hit on all the time!
• Why did the percussionist start a bakery? He wanted to make beats with his dough!
• How did the percussionist apologize to his bandmates for missing a beat? He said, “I promise to snare-ly disappoint you again.” .
• Why did the percussionist get arrested? They couldn’t stop hitting the snare and it was a real drum-and-bass!
• Why did the percussionist get in trouble at school? They were always drumming up mischief!
• Why did the drum set go to therapy? It had a lot of unresolved cymbal issues.
• Why did the percussionist become a teacher? Because he wanted to drum some knowledge into his students!
• Why did the drummer join a circus? They wanted to be the ultimate ringmaster of beats!
• Why did the drummer get kicked out of the marching band? Because he couldn’t keep in step and kept drumming to his own beat.
• Why did the cow become a percussionist? Because it had the best cow-bells in the barnyard band!
• Why did the cymbal get an award? It was outstanding in its field!
• Why did the cymbals never get invited to parties? Because they always clashed with other guests.
• What did the drummer say when he locked his keys in his car? “Can I borrow your key, Cymbal?”
• Why did the percussionist become a baker? Because he wanted to make some serious dough!
• What’s a percussionist’s favorite type of car? A “cymbal”-tique!
• Why did the drummer join a cooking class? He wanted to learn how to make the perfect beat-er!
• Why was the drumming ant always getting in trouble? Because it was always causing treble.
• Why did the percussionist get a speeding ticket? Because he couldn’t resist hitting the hi-hat!
• Why did the triangle player always carry a map? Because he didn’t want to get lost in the rhythm section!
• Why did the snare drum go to the party? Because it wanted to make some noise!
• Why did the drumsticks go to school? They wanted to get a good education in beating!
• Why did the drummer audition for the circus? He wanted to be the best at drum rolls!
• What did the percussionist say to the drummer? Stick with me, and we’ll make some great beats!
• Why did the xylophone start a band? It wanted to strike a chord with the audience!
• Why did the percussionist get locked out of his house? He lost his keys and couldn’t find the right tempo!
• What did the percussionist say to their annoying neighbor? “Could you please cymbal down? I’m trying to practice!”
• What did the percussionist say when they couldn’t find their drumsticks? “I’m in a real stick-y situation!”
• Why did the percussionist go broke? Because he couldn’t find any gigs that paid enough to drum up some cash.
• What did the drummer say to the band leader? “You can count on me to beat it.” .
• What’s a drummer’s favorite type of jewelry? Drum-sticks.
• Why did the percussionist get arrested? He couldn’t keep his hi-hat under control.
• What did the drummer say to the snare drum? “You’re always so snappy!”
• Why was the percussionist always broke? They couldn’t stop making cymbal mistakes!
• Why did the percussionist become a detective? Because he had an uncanny ability to drum up evidence!
• Why did the percussionist bring a ladder to the gig? Because they heard the drum solo was going to be on a higher level!
• Why did the xylophone player always bring a pencil to performances? To drum up some extra notes.
• Why did the percussionist refuse to share their dessert? They believed in keeping their drumsticks to themselves!
• What did the percussionist say when he accidentally dropped his drumsticks? “Oops, I guess I need to work on my grip!”
• Why did the drum set start going to therapy? It had a snare disorder and couldn’t stop crashing!
• Why did the percussionist take up gardening? Because he wanted to grow his own rhythm section!
• Why did the drum enroll in therapy? It had a case of high-hat-tension!
• Why did the drummer go to jail? They got caught in a cymbal crime.
• Why did the percussionist start a bakery? Because he kneaded dough and had a banging snare!
• Why was the xylophone player always so happy? Because they always hit the right notes!
• Why was the drum so bad at keeping a secret? It couldn’t keep a beat!
• What did the drummer say when he got locked out of his house? “I can’t find the key, but I can definitely drum up a solution.”

 

Percussion Dad Jokes

Percussion dad jokes hit the right note when it comes to combining humor with a beat that’s hard to resist.

They’re the type of jokes that are so offbeat, they’re on point.

Ideal for music class, band practice, or a family jam session, these jokes are sure to drum up a good laugh.

Prepare yourself for the drumrolls and the laughter.

Here are some percussion dad jokes that will make your day:

• Why was the drum so bad at sports? Because it couldn’t find its rhythm!
• What did the drummer say to the percussionist? “We need to stick together, no matter how cymbal our differences may be!”
• Why did the drum set file a police report? It got hi-hat-jacked!
• Why did the percussionist always carry a towel? To wipe away the sweat and the drum beats!
• Why did the percussionist become a farmer? Because they wanted to grow a great beat!
• Why did the percussionist bring sticks to the baseball game? Because he wanted to drum up some support!
• What’s a drummer’s favorite kind of sandwich? One that’s filled with “beats” and “rhythm”!
• Why was the percussionist always calm and collected? Because they knew how to keep a steady beat!
• How does a percussionist communicate on the internet? Through drumsticks!
• Why did the cow become a percussionist? Because it had excellent cowbell skills!
• What did the snare drum say to the hi-hat? I’m always here to lend a hand.
• Why was the drum so bad at making decisions? Because it always got caught in a cymbal of doubt!
• Why did the percussionist join a baseball team? Because he knew how to bring the “strike.”
• Why do drummers love nature? Because they always enjoy a good snare!
• Why did the drumstick go to the party alone? Because it didn’t want to get in a sticky situation with the other utensils!
• Why was the drum set always getting into trouble? Because it couldn’t keep its “beat” under control!
• Why did the percussionist go broke? Because they couldn’t stop snare drumming up debt!
• Why did the percussionist bring a map to the concert? Because he didn’t want to miss a beat!
• What did the snare drum say to the bass drum? “You’re a real low beat!”
• Why was the percussionist always broke? Because they couldn’t resist buying more cowbells!
• Why did the snare drum refuse to play in the marching band? Because it didn’t want to march to the same beat all the time!
• Why do percussionists make great detectives? Because they always keep a good beat!
• Why did the percussionist get locked out of his house? Because he lost his keys and had no rhythm to knock!
• Why don’t drummers ever get lost? Because they always find their way with their drumsticks.
• Why did the drumstick go to therapy? Because it was tired of being beaten all the time!
• What did the drummer say to his bandmates after a successful concert? Let’s hit it again!
• Why do drummers make great detectives? Because they’re always looking for the perfect beat!
• Why was the drum set cold? Because it left its cymbals outside.
• What did the drummer say to his drumsticks? “You guys really know how to stick with me through thick and snare!”
• Why did the percussionist become a chef? Because he knew how to bring the beat to the kitchen!
• Why did the snare drum go on a diet? It wanted to be a little lighter on the beat!
• Why was the drum set cold? Because it was surrounded by hi-hats!
• Why did the percussionist switch to playing maracas? Because they wanted to shake things up!
• Why did the drummer bring a map to the gig? Because he wanted to find his way around the snare!
• Why did the cymbal crash the party? Because it wanted to make some noise and symbol-ize its presence!
• Why was the snare drum so good at telling jokes? Because it always had a great rimshot!
• What do you call a drummer that can’t keep a steady beat? A broken rhythm section!
• Why was the percussionist always late for rehearsals? He couldn’t find the time to beat it!
• Why did the cymbal refuse to join the orchestra? It didn’t want to clash with anyone!
• Why did the drummer join the circus? Because they heard they needed someone skilled in “hi-hat” tricks!
• Why did the percussionist bring a dictionary to the gig? Because he wanted to define the rhythm!
• What did the percussionist say when they accidentally dropped their drumstick? “Oh, snap!” .
• How do you make a drummer’s car more aerodynamic? Take the pizza delivery sign off the roof!
• Why did the drummer become a baker? Because he kneaded a new rhythm in his life!
• Why did the drumstick go to school? Because it wanted to get an “education” in percussion!
• Why did the cymbal take a bath? Because it needed a crash course in cleanliness!
• What did the percussionist say when he got a job at the bakery? “I’m really good at keeping the beat and rolling the dough!”
• Why did the percussionist go broke? Because they couldn’t stop buying new cymbals – they were addicted to the crash!
• Why do percussionists love cooking? Because they can always drum up some delicious recipes.
• Why was the bass drum feeling self-conscious? Because it always felt a bit overshadowed.
• What do you call a drummer without a girlfriend? Homeless, because he’s always banging on things!
• Why do drummers love playing hide and seek? Because they always find the perfect spot to hide behind the drum kit.
• Why was the drum always late for work? Because it couldn’t beat the traffic!
• Why did the percussionist always carry drumsticks in their pocket? In case they needed to snare some attention!
• Why did the percussionist always carry a metronome? Because they liked to keep the beat in check-ord!
• Why did the drummer become a gardener? Because he enjoyed the sound of planting beats in the soil!
• Why do drummers always have great posture? Because they sit up straight and drumroll, please!
• Why did the xylophone player bring a pillow to the gig? Because they wanted to “soften” the sound!
• What did the snare drum say to the bass drum? “You’re such a hit at parties!”
• Why did the percussionist go broke? Because he couldn’t control his hi-hat spending.
• How do you make a drummer stop playing? Take away their sheet music!
• Why did the drummer join a cooking class? They wanted to learn how to beat eggs and drumsticks at the same time!
• How do you describe a percussionist’s vacation? A well-timed break!
• Why don’t drummers ever get lost? Because they always follow the beat of their own drum!
• How do you fix a broken drum? With a drum roll, of course!
• Why did the percussionist join a band? Because they couldn’t resist the drum-atic allure!
• Why did the cymbal refuse to listen to the other instruments? Because it didn’t want to be influenced by “sound” advice!
• What do you get when you cross a drummer and a tap dancer? A percussionist who’s always in sync and has happy feet!
• Why was the drum set always the life of the party? Because it knew how to break the ice with a good beat!
• Why did the cymbal refuse to share its dinner? It was tired of being a crash course for other utensils!
• What did the cymbals say to the drum set? “You’re really crashing the party!”
• Why did the drummer bring a pillow to the concert? Because he wanted to dampen the sound of the cymbals crashing!
• Why did the percussionist go to jail? Because he couldn’t resist the urge to hit all the bars!
• Why do percussionists make terrible comedians? Because they always drum up bad jokes!
• Why was the percussionist such a good gardener? He knew how to drum up some soil!
• Why do drummers love pizza? Because they can really beat the crust!
• Why did the drummer become an astronaut? Because he wanted to explore the space between the beats!
• What did the percussionist say when their friend asked for a loan? “Sure, I’ll drum up the money!”
• Why was the percussionist always broke? Because he spent all his money on drumsticks and cymbals!
• Why did the percussionist become a gardener? Because they wanted to sow some beats in the soil!
• Why do drummers love gardening? Because they enjoy playing with their snare drum!
• What do you call a drummer without a girlfriend? Homeless, because he can’t keep a “steady” beat!
• How do you make a drummer’s car faster? Take off the brake pedal and replace it with a bass drum pedal!
• What did the cymbal say to the drummer? Stop hitting on me, it’s making me crash!
• Why did the drummer refuse to play with the rest of the band? He didn’t want to be cymbal-ly associated!
• What do you call a percussionist who can’t keep a steady beat? A “symbol” of bad rhythm!
• Why did the drummer bring a map to the gig? Because they didn’t want to get “bass”-tangled on their way there!
• Why did the tambourine go to therapy? Because it couldn’t shake off its insecurities!
• Why did the percussionist become a chef? Because he wanted to drum up some good beats in the kitchen!
• What do you call a drummer who just broke up with his girlfriend? Homeless! Because he couldn’t keep a steady beat.
• Why did the drum kit go to therapy? It had too many issues with hi-hat relationships!
• Why was the percussionist so good at math? Because they could always “count” on their skills!
• Why don’t drummers get hungry? Because they can always eat a good beat!
• Why did the percussionist keep hitting himself with sticks? Because it was the only way to “drum” up some self-esteem.
• Why did the percussionist go to the doctor? They had a cymbal-ism!
• Why did the percussionist always carry a pencil behind their ear? So they could drum up some ideas whenever they needed!
• What did the drum set say to the guitarist? “I like the way you strum it, but I beat it!”
• Why was the percussionist always so calm and composed? Because they knew how to control their timpani tantrums!
• What did the percussionist say when his cymbal fell off a cliff? Oh, well, that’s a crash landing!
• What did the percussionist say when he got a job at the bakery? “I’m ready to roll!”
• Why did the drummer have a hard time sleeping? Because he kept hearing the rhythm of his dreams in his head!
• Why did the percussionist bring a map to the gig? In case he needed to find his way to the beats!
• Why did the drummer get a job at the bakery? Because he kneaded some extra dough!
• Why did the drummer join the circus? Because they wanted to “beat” the competition!
• What do you get when you cross a percussionist and a bulldog? A lot of noise and a good drummer!
• Why was the drum set always getting in trouble? It had a bad cymbal record!
• How do you make a drum roll? Just push it down the hill!
• What do you call a percussionist who can keep a steady rhythm while juggling? A multi-tasking maestro!
• Why did the drummer bring a map to the concert? In case he needed some direction.
• Why don’t percussionists play hide-and-seek? Because they always make too much noise!
• What’s a percussionist’s favorite type of car? A drumroll, please… a Honda Accord!
• Why did the percussionist always carry a hammer? In case he needed to nail the rhythm!
• What’s a percussionist’s favorite type of coffee? A cappuccino, because it has a great beat!
• What did the triangle say to the drummer? “You’re too cymbal-minded!”
• What do you call a drum set on a porch? A patio-rhythm section!
• Why was the percussionist always cold? Because he couldn’t find the right tempo!
• What do you call a drummer without a girlfriend? Homeless, but at least he’s got good rhythm!
• Why did the snare drum go to school? Because it wanted to get a little more snare-ducation!
• Why was the percussionist always late for practice? Because they had a hard time keeping time.
• Why did the percussionist go broke? Because he couldn’t stop hitting the cymbals!
• Why do drummers love nature? Because they have a natural rhythm!
• Why did the percussionist go to the doctor? Because he had a bad “case” of the “bongo” flu!
• Why did the percussionist get a pet bird? So he could teach it to drumroll on command!
• Why did the percussionist go to the bakery? Because they wanted to see if they could get a “roll” on the drums!
• Why did the percussionist become a lawyer? Because they were tired of all the drumming lawsuits!
• What’s a percussionist’s favorite type of footwear? Drum-mer shoes!
• Why did the percussionist become a gardener? Because they loved planting beats in the rhythm of nature!
• Why did the percussionist start a bakery? Because he loved the sound of rolling a good dough on the snare drum!
• Why did the percussionist get a ticket? Because he was caught drumming and driving!
• Why did the drum kit go to therapy? Because it had some serious cymbal issues!
• What do you call a drummer without a girlfriend? Homeless, because he can’t “bass” his life on anything.
• Why did the percussionist bring a pillow to the concert? Because they wanted to get some snare rest!
• Why did the percussionist refuse to play at the party? Because they didn’t want to “beat” around the bush.
• Why did the drummer join the circus? He wanted to be a part of the drumroll brigade!
• Why don’t drummers ever get lost? Because they always have their sticks to point the way.
• How do you make a drummer’s car faster? Take away the drumsticks, they’re always slowing it down with their beats!
• Why did the drum set go to therapy? Because it had hit too many lows and couldn’t find its rhythm!
• What do you call a snobby percussionist? A “percussion elitist”!
• Why was the percussionist always out of breath? He was always playing his heart out!

 

Percussion Jokes for Kids

Percussion jokes for kids are the lively beats of the humor world – energetic, vibrant, and sure to strike a chord with young ones.

These jokes allow kids to engage with language in a playful, rhythmical way, helping them appreciate the delight of puns and wordplay.

This interaction with humor can foster a love for music, particularly percussion instruments, as lively as the rhythms they produce.

Moreover, percussion jokes for kids have the added advantage of making music education entertaining, turning those drumsticks in their hands into a source of laughter.

Ready for some rhythmical hilarity?

Here are the jokes that’ll have them drumming up laughter in no time:

• How do you fix a broken drum? With a drumstick plaster!
• What is a drum’s favorite type of food? Beats!
• Why did the drummer go to jail? Because they couldn’t keep time behind bars!
• What do you get if you cross a drum with a snack? A crisp hit!
• Why did the drummer go to school? To learn drum-atics!
• What do you call a fish that can play percussion instruments? A drumstickle!
• How do you communicate with a percussionist? You use “symbol” language!
• What do you call a drummer who becomes a doctor? A percussionist!
• Why do drummers always carry a spare pair of drumsticks? In case they break a beat.
• What did the drum say to the other drum at band practice? “Nice to beat you!”
• What did one drum say to the other drum? “I feel like we’re in sync!”
• What do you call a drummer who can’t keep a beat? A broken cymbal-ist!
• Why was the percussionist so tired? He was always drumming up new ideas!
• What do you call a snobbish drum? A snare of superiority!
• Why did the drum go to school? To get his “beats” in education!
• Why did the scarecrow become a percussionist? Because he had the best rhythm in the field!
• Why did the drum never go to the party? It always got a little too snare-y!
• What do you call a drummer who keeps time while cooking? A sous chef!
• Why did the drummer go to school? Because he wanted to be a smart beat.
• What do you call a drum that becomes a detective? Sherlock Holmes!
• Why did the percussionist bring their pet snake to the concert? Because they wanted to make some rattling beats!
• Why did the percussionist become a chef? Because they loved to beat eggs and whisk the day away!
• Why was the drum always out of tune? Because it had a bad case of the flu!
• Why don’t drummers ever get lost? Because they always have a good sense of “rhythm”!
• What do you call a drum that has fallen down the stairs? A “tum-tum” drum.
• How do you communicate with a percussionist underwater? With sign waves!
• What do you call a drum that rolls down a hill? A snare roller!
• How do drummers communicate? They send beat-mails!
• Why did the percussionist bring a lawn chair to the concert? Because he wanted to sit back and relax his beat!
• Why did the percussionist bring drumsticks to the zoo? In case he had to play a cheetah!
• Why did the percussionist bring a map to the gig? Because he didn’t want to get lost in the beats!
• Why did the percussionist always carry a spare set of drumsticks? In case he needed a backup plan!
• What do you call a drummer who breaks up with their girlfriend? Homeless, and also single-sticked!
• Why was the drum set always running late? Because it had too many cymbals to “crash” before leaving.
• What do you call a musical instrument that can be found in the bathroom? A tuba toothpaste!
• Why did the percussionist always have gum in their pocket? In case they needed some snare-o-chew!
• What do you call a drummer with no arms or legs? A headbanger!
• Why was the drum always getting into trouble? Because he couldn’t keep his “beat” manners!
• How does a drum apologize? It beats itself up!
• Why did the drum take up fishing? Because it wanted to catch some snare-mon!
• What did one drum say to the other drum? “I’m tired of being “snare”d all the time!”
• Why was the drumming elephant so good at keeping time? Because she had a trunk for rhythm!
• What do you call a bear playing the drums? A grizzly drummer!
• Why did the cymbal take a vacation? It needed some “clash” time!
• Why did the percussionist bring a pair of drumsticks to the baseball game? Because he wanted to strike out the batters!
• Why did the drummer go to jail? Because he got caught drumming up trouble!
• Why did the tambourine join the orchestra? Because it wanted to shake things up.
• Why did the tambourine go to the party alone? Because it didn’t want to be a part of a drum roll!
• What do you call a drum that fell off a cliff? A bongo-drum!
• Why did the drummer join a gardening club? Because they wanted to “plant” some sick beats!
• Why was the percussionist always tired? Because they were always “banging” their head against the wall of rhythm!
• Why did the cymbal take a nap? Because it was feeling a bit “crash-ed” out!
• What’s a drum’s favorite exercise? A snare-jog!
• Why do percussionists make good comedians? Because they always have great timing!
• What did the percussionist say when he lost his job? “I guess I’ll have to drum up some new opportunities!”
• Why did the cymbal crash into the drum? Because they had a smashtastic relationship!
• What did the drummer say to the band director? I’m ready to beat it!
• What’s a percussionist’s favorite type of exercise? Drum-aerobics!
• Why was the percussionist always on time? Because he had a good “rhythm” of getting ready!
• What do you call a drum that can swim? A bongo!
• Why was the percussionist always happy? Because they knew how to “drum” up some fun!
• How do you make a tissue dance? You put a little “boogie” in it!
• Why did the percussionist bring an umbrella to the gig? In case it started to rain sticks and stones!
• What do you call a cow that plays percussion? A moo-sician!
• Why do drummers always have a smile on their face? Because they beat it!
• Why was the drum set always running late? Because it was always missing a hi-hat!
• Why did the snare drum always get in trouble? It was always causing a racket!
• What do you call a drummer who keeps time? A grandfather clock!
• Why don’t percussionists get sunburned? Because they always have their shades on – their drumsticks!
• What’s a percussionist’s favorite type of fish? A bass drum!
• What do you get when you cross a drum with a computer? A drum machine!
• Why did the snare drum go to the doctor? Because it had a bad case of the rim shots!
• What do you call a dinosaur that plays the drums? A dino-saur-us!
• Why don’t skeletons play percussion instruments? Because they have no body to keep the beat!
• Why did the drum go to the doctor? It wasn’t feeling well, and it needed some beats-amine!
• What did the percussionist say after a great performance? That was a cymbal of success!
• Why was the percussionist always so happy? Because they had a great sense of rhythm and a snare in their step!
• What do you call a percussionist who just broke up with their partner? A snare drum, because they’re single and looking to mingle!
• What do you call a dinosaur playing the drums? A tyranno-saurus rex!
• Why was the xylophone so good at math? Because it always knew its scales!
• What did the snare drum say to the cymbals? “You guys really crash the party!”
• Why don’t drummers ever kiss? Because they have too many cymbals!
• What do you call a percussionist who doesn’t have a girlfriend? Home on a Saturday night!
• What did the percussionist say when they finally mastered their drum solo? “I’m on a roll!”
• What did the cymbal say to the snare drum? “You’re making a lot of noise! Cymbal down!”
• Why did the percussionist bring a baseball bat to the concert? To beat the band!
• What did the percussionist say when he lost his drumsticks? “I can’t beat it anymore!”
• Why was the percussionist always out of breath? Because he was always drumming up a storm!
• What’s a drum’s favorite type of sandwich? A bongo-loney!
• Why did the snare drum roll down the hill? Because it wanted to “drum” up some excitement!
• What did the percussionist say to the drummer who kept losing his sticks? “You need to drum up some better grip!”
• Why was the drum kit afraid of heights? Because it didn’t want to come crashing down!
• Why did the percussionist refuse to play with birds? Because they always tweet the wrong notes!
• Why was the math book sad? It had too many problems!
• How did the percussionist fix his broken drum? With drumsticks!
• Why did the percussionist bring a ladder to the concert? Because they wanted to reach new heights with their drumming skills!
• What do you call a drummer who just broke up with his girlfriend? Homeless, because now he’s living in a crash pad!
• Why did the percussionist go to medical school? They wanted to learn how to cure a case of the “beat-ies”!
• Why did the snare drum visit the doctor? It had a case of the high snare pressure.
• Why did the percussionist bring their own chair to the concert? So they could have a “percussion” seat!
• Why did the cymbal take a nap? Because it needed some rest!
• What do you call a fish that can play the drums? A drumstix!
• Why was the drum feeling down? Because it was feeling a little beat up!
• Why did the chicken become a percussionist? Because it had the drumsticks!
• Why did the percussionist eat their drumsticks? Because they wanted a delicious “beet” for their meal!
• Why did the percussionist join the circus? Because they wanted to play with the hi-hats!
• Why was the drum always out of breath? Because it was always beating.
• What’s a drummer’s favorite kind of food? Beats me!
• What do you get if you cross a drummer with a computer? A lot of banging on the keyboard!
• How does a percussionist turn off the lights before going to bed? With a drum roll, of course!
• What do you call a drum that can’t keep a secret? A snare drum!
• Why did the drum get a promotion? Because it had a great beat!
• What do you get when you cross a drummer with a vacuum cleaner? A neat beat!
• What do you call a monkey that loves percussion? A bongo-rilla!
• Why was the percussionist always out of breath? Because they were always “beating” the tempo!
• What is a drum major’s favorite kind of bird? A marching penguin!
• What do you get when you cross a drummer with a computer? A lot of hard drive!
• Why was the percussionist always so happy? Because he had a lot of rhythm in his life!
• What do you call a drum set that’s missing its cymbals? A drum kit without a “splash” of sound!

 

Percussion Jokes for Adults

Who says adults can’t enjoy a good drum roll followed by a punchline?

Percussion jokes for adults strike the right chord of humor, combining clever puns with a subtle hint of mischief.

Just like a well-executed drum solo, these jokes bring together elements of wit, intellect, and a bit of audacity to create a resonating chuckle.

Perfect for band practices, music-themed parties, or simply to add a beat to a monotonous conversation among friends.

Here are some percussion jokes that are certain to ‘hit’ the funny bone of adults:

• Why couldn’t the percussionist find his drumsticks? Because they were in the beat-up kit!
• What did the drummer say to the band after a successful performance? “That was drum-tastic!”
• Why did the snare drum go to school? It wanted to learn how to make some beats!
• What’s the best way to communicate with a percussionist? Through “beats” of course!
• Why did the drummer become an astronaut? They wanted to explore the “crash cymbals” of outer space!
• Why did the percussionist go broke? They couldn’t stop buying cymbals, they were just crashing their budget!
• How do you calm down an angry drummer? Give them some “Rhythm & Bruise” cream!
• Why did the drummer go broke? Because he couldn’t handle his high hat!
• What did the drummer say to the rest of the band after they broke up? “Don’t worry, I’ll just find another beat!”
• What did the drummer say to the guitarist? “Can you please drum up some rhythm in your playing?”
• Why did the percussionist refuse to play the triangle? He thought it was just a pointless instrument!
• Why did the drummer join a band? Because he couldn’t find a steady job!
• What’s a drummer’s favorite kind of sandwich? One with plenty of “cymbal-tic” jam!
• Why don’t percussionists ever tell secrets? Because they can’t keep a beat!
• Why do drummers always get mistaken for burglars? They’re always carrying around their snare drums!
• Why did the drummer join a marching band? He thought it was a great way to “drum” up some attention!
• Why did the percussionist start a gardening business? They wanted to be known for their sick “drum rolls”!
• Why did the drummer get kicked out of his own band? He couldn’t stop hitting on the tambourine player!
• Why did the drummer get kicked out of the band? He couldn’t keep a steady beat and was always hitting on the wrong cymbal!
• Why did the percussionist get in trouble at the music store? They couldn’t resist playing with all the instruments!
• Why was the percussionist so good at juggling? Because they could handle multiple sticks at once!
• How many drummers does it take to change a lightbulb? Only one, but they have to keep speeding up until the light turns on!
• Why was the percussionist always the last person to leave the party? Because he had to beat it!
• What did the percussionist say to their bandmates? “Let’s snare this gig and drum up some applause!”
• Why did the percussionist refuse to play in the orchestra? They couldn’t find the right rhythm!
• Why did the percussionist get locked out of his car? Because he left his keys in the drum set!
• What did the percussionist say to the drummer after their gig? “Nice beats, but you need to cymbal down!”
• Why did the percussionist become a musician? Because they couldn’t resist the sound of a good beat!
• Why was the percussionist always borrowing money? He couldn’t keep time, so he kept bouncing checks!
• Why was the percussionist always late to band practice? He had trouble finding his rhythm!
• Why did the drum set go to the casino? It wanted to try its luck on the snare drum!
• Why did the percussionist break up with his girlfriend? She couldn’t handle his banging!
• Why did the cymbal run away? It couldn’t stand the drummer’s crashing attitude!
• Why did the percussionist get a day job? His drumming career was just a “cymbal” of his true potential!
• Why did the snare drum go to therapy? It had a hard time finding its “center” in the band!
• What’s the difference between a drummer and a savings bond? Eventually, the savings bond will mature and earn money!
• What do you call a percussionist who loses their drumsticks? A bongo-er!
• What’s a percussionist’s favorite type of weather? Heavy metal!
• Why did the snare drum join the military? It wanted to serve its country with a bang!
• What’s the difference between a drummer and a philosopher? The philosopher can’t keep a steady rhythm, but the drummer can’t keep a steady job!
• Why did the percussionist join the marching band? Because they couldn’t resist the drum line’s “snare” pressure!
• Why don’t drummers ever get sunburned? They spend all their time behind a cymbal!
• Why did the drum set refuse to play any more gigs? It needed a break!
• Why did the percussionist refuse to play with the orchestra? They couldn’t handle the tuba-lar pressure!
• Why did the drummer join a marching band? He always wanted to exercise while making noise!
• What do you get when you throw a piano down a mineshaft? A flat miner!
• Why did the percussionist always have a backup plan? They knew how to roll with the crashes!
• Why did the drummer get a speeding ticket? He was caught playing a double bass!
• What did the drum say to the other drum on their wedding day? “I’m so happy, I could just crash!” .
• What do you call a drummer who has just won the lottery? A millionaire in perfect rhythm!
• How many drummers does it take to change a lightbulb? None, they have machines that can do that now! Drummers just provide the beat!
• What’s a drummer’s favorite type of exercise? Playing the crash cymbals!
• Why did the percussionist become a chef? They wanted to add a little extra ‘flavor’ to their drumming!
• What did the snare drum say to the cymbals? “You sound like a crash course in music!”
• Why did the percussionist become a mechanic? They loved drumming so much, they wanted to ‘tune’ up cars too!
• Why do drummers make great comedians? They’re always drumming up laughter!
• Why did the drummer always bring extra sticks to a gig? In case he needed to drum up some business!
• What did the drummer say to the band after they played a terrible gig? “Let’s beat it.”
• Why did the percussionist go broke? Because he couldn’t keep a steady beat in his bank account!
• Why did the drummer join a motorcycle gang? He loved the sound of the revving engines!
• What did the percussionist say when someone stole their drumsticks? “I’m in a bit of a sticky situation!”
• What did the snare drum say to the bass drum? “You’re always stealing the spotlight, give me a break!”
• What’s a percussionist’s favorite drink? A snare-garita!
• Why did the percussionist bring a ladder to their concert? To reach the high notes on the xylophone, of course!
• What’s a percussionist’s favorite type of tree? The snare tree!
• Why did the drummer get a speeding ticket? They couldn’t resist playing the pedal to the metal!
• Why was the percussionist always wearing headphones? So they could drum along to their favorite tunes without disturbing anyone!
• What’s a drummer’s favorite exercise? Hitting the cymbal-etics!
• Why did the drummer get kicked out of the marching band? He couldn’t keep in step with reality!
• Why did the percussionist bring a pillow to the concert? In case they wanted to play a soft beat!
• Why did the cymbal go to jail? It was caught making too many crashes!
• Why did the drum kit go to therapy? It had trouble finding its rhythm!
• Why did the drummer become a pastry chef? Because he loved beating eggs and whipping cream!
• Why did the percussionist get arrested? They couldn’t stop hitting the cymbals!
• What do you call a drum set that falls down the stairs? A crash landing!
• Why did the percussionist join a marching band? Because they wanted to beat the competition!
• How do you know if the stage is level? The drummer is drooling out of both sides of his mouth!
• Why don’t drummers ever play hide and seek? Because good luck finding one who can stay quiet!
• Why did the xylophone player always carry a map? So he wouldn’t get lost in the bars!
• Why did the percussionist always carry a spare set of drumsticks? In case he wanted to “stick” around for an encore!
• What’s a percussionist’s favorite kind of pizza? Anything with plenty of beats and drumsticks!
• Why did the drum set go to therapy? It needed some snare assistance!
• What’s a drummer’s favorite type of computer? One with a lot of RAM!
• Why did the drummer only take his lunch to rehearsals? Because he couldn’t “taco” bout how bad the sandwiches were in front of the band!
• What do you call a drumming octopus? A cephalopodestrian!
• Why was the percussionist always late for rehearsals? They couldn’t resist playing a little drum solo before leaving the house!
• Why did the percussionist get kicked out of the orchestra? He couldn’t stop “banging” on his neighbor’s timpani!
• What’s a percussionist’s favorite type of car? One with great “drum” brakes!
• Why did the percussionist bring their drumsticks to the restaurant? Because they wanted to “beat” the crowd!
• What did the percussionist say after a successful gig? “That really struck a chord!”
• Why did the cow want to be a percussionist? It wanted to “mooove” to the rhythm!
• Why did the cow want to play the drums? Because it had a great “moo-sical” sense!
• Why did the cymbal player join a gym? He wanted to work on his crash course!
• Why did the percussionist get in trouble at the symphony? They couldn’t keep their hi-hat to themselves!
• Why did the drummer join a softball team? He heard they needed someone to hit the percussion section!
• Why did the drummer get arrested? He was caught in a cymbal crime!
• What’s a percussionist’s favorite type of sandwich? A “beat” and cheese sandwich!
• Why don’t drummers play hide and seek? Because good luck finding a hiding spot with those big drum kits!
• Why did the percussionist go broke? Because he spent all his money on “cymbals” and nowhere to live!
• How do you make a percussionist’s car go faster? Remove the drum brakes!
• What’s a drummer’s favorite type of cheese? Swiss, because it’s holy!
• Why did the percussionist get locked out of their house? They forgot their keys on the snare drum!
• Why did the percussionist go broke? Because they couldn’t find a steady gig!
• Why did the percussionist start playing the triangle? Because it was the easiest way to make a living off three notes!
• What did the drummer say when they won the lottery? “I hit the jackpot!”
• How do you know a drummer is knocking on your door? The knocking speeds up and slows down randomly!
• Why do drummers always have a smile on their faces? Because hitting things makes them happy!
• Why did the timpani player join a gym? He wanted to strengthen his bass drum rolls!
• What’s a drummer’s favorite type of pants? Cymbals!
• Why do percussionists make great detectives? They’re always good at finding the beat!
• What did the percussionist say to their bandmates when they couldn’t find their drumsticks? “I’m feeling a little unstrung today!”
• How many drummers does it take to change a lightbulb? Five. One to change it, and four to argue about how much better Neil Peart could do it!
• How do you get a drummer off your porch? Pay for the pizza!
• Why was the drum set so expensive? Because it was snare-ly new!
• Why did the drummer get into trouble? He kept drumming up trouble!
• Why was the percussionist always in a hurry? He didn’t want to miss a beat!
• What do you call a drummer who breaks up with their significant other? A cymbal of commitment issues!
• Why did the percussionist become a chef? He wanted to beat eggs and drums at the same time!
• Why did the drummer get kicked out of the music store? He couldn’t find the right beat.
• What did the cymbals say to the drummer? “Let’s crash this party!”
• Why did the percussionist get into a fight with the conductor? They had a difference of “bass”ic opinions!
• Why did the percussionist take up gardening? He wanted to see if he could make some beats with his plants!
• Why did the maracas break up? They couldn’t shake their differences!
• Why did the drummer go broke? Because they had too many cymbal crashes!
• Why did the percussionist get kicked out of the band? He couldn’t keep his cymbals under control!
• Why did the percussionist get hired as a private investigator? Because he was good at keeping time and cracking cases!
• What did the drummer say when he got locked out of his house? “I need to get my keys, but I can’t find the right time!”
• Why was the drum set always out of breath? Because it had too many hi-hats!
• Why did the percussionist carry an extra pair of drumsticks? In case he lost his rhythm!
• Why did the percussionist put their drumset in the oven? Because they wanted to make hot beats!
• How did the drum set get promoted? It was snared by a higher position!
• Why did the cymbal go to jail? It was guilty of excessive crashing!
• Why did the percussionist get arrested? He couldn’t “bass” himself out of a drumming solo!
• Why did the drummer get a day job? Because he couldn’t make “ends meet” with just drumming gigs!
• What did the drummer say when they got a new gig? “I’ll beat the competition!”
• Why did the cow become a percussionist? Because it had a natural talent for cow bells!
• Why was the drum set always covered in dust? Because the percussionist couldn’t find time to clean up his act!

 

Percussion Joke Generator

Drumming up the perfect percussion joke can sometimes feel like a beat missed.

(You catching my rhythm?)

That’s where our FREE Percussion Joke Generator comes in to keep the tempo.

Designed to blend ingenious puns, snappy humor, and playful phrases, it creates jokes that are guaranteed to make a resounding impact.

Don’t let your humor fade to a quiet whisper.

Use our joke generator to create jokes that strike the perfect note and keep your humor as vibrant and lively as your percussions.

 

FAQs About Percussion Jokes

Why are percussion jokes popular?

Percussion jokes are popular due to the universal appeal of music and the unique characteristics of percussion instruments.

They cater to a wide audience, especially those with a musical background or interest, and offer a playful and humorous way to appreciate the complexities of rhythm and beat.

 

Can percussion jokes help in social situations?

Absolutely!

Sharing a joke is a wonderful way to lighten up the atmosphere.

Percussion jokes, due to their musical nature, can often strike a chord with many people.

They’re a hit at parties, gatherings, and especially at music-related events.

 

How can I come up with my own percussion jokes?

1. Understand the basics of percussion instruments—their sounds, the way they’re played, their roles in the orchestra, etc.
2. Percussion instruments have a unique vocabulary associated with them (e.g., drumsticks, snares, cymbals). Look for homonyms or interesting phrases involving these words.
3. Think about the setting of your joke. Is it in a band, during a performance, or in a music store? Tailor your humor to match this context.
4. Take a well-known saying or phrase and modify it to include elements of percussion.
5. Embrace puns and wordplay. Percussion jokes are primed for this kind of humorous linguistic twist!

 

Are there any tips for remembering percussion jokes?

Try to associate percussion jokes with musical situations or events where they can be used—like rehearsals, concerts, or music classes.

Linking jokes with these situations can help them stay in your memory.

 

How can I make my percussion jokes better?

The surprise element is crucial.

Connect with your audience, use the element of surprise, and don’t hesitate to play with words.

Keep practicing and sharing your jokes to see what resonates most with your listeners.

 

How does the Percussion Joke Generator work?

Our Percussion Joke Generator is your source for quick and funny percussion-related humor.

Simply enter keywords related to your situation or the instrument in question, and click the Generate Jokes button.

You’ll instantly receive a list of hilarious percussion jokes ready to share.

 

Is the Percussion Joke Generator free?

Yes, our Percussion Joke Generator is completely free to use!

Create unlimited jokes to keep your content interesting and entertaining.

Feel free to drum up laughter wherever you go with our humorous percussion jokes.

 

Conclusion

Percussion jokes add a rhythmic beat to everyday conversations, making life a bit more enjoyable with each hearty guffaw.

From the quick and snappy to the long and laugh-inducing, there’s a percussion joke to drum up laughter for every occasion.

So the next time you’re tapping out a beat, remember, there’s humor to be found in every drumstick, cymbal crash, and rhythm line.

Keep spreading the laughter, and let the good times beat and roll.

Because after all, a day without laughter is like a day without percussion—unimaginable and, frankly, a bit out of sync.

Happy joking, everyone!

Bongo Jokes for a Rhythmic Chuckle

Drum Jokes That Will Beat Your Blues Away

Gong Jokes That Will Resonate with Your Funny Bone

Timpani Jokes That Will Make Your Day Ring

Cymbal Jokes to Crash Into Laughter