741 Armor Jokes That Will Have You Jousting with Laughter

If you’re here, it means you’re ready to buckle down and dive into the world of armor jokes.

Not just any jokes, but the finest in the stronghold.

That’s why we’ve forged a list of the most hilarious armor jokes.

From shield-shattering puns to knightly one-liners, our compilation has a joke for every facet of the battlefield.

So, let’s penetrate the iron-clad humor of armor, one joke at a time.

Contents show

Armor Jokes

Armor jokes have a special allure that can tickle anyone’s funny bone.

They’re not only centered around the protective gear itself but also the historical context and legends that surround it.

From the bravest knights in shining armor to the peculiarities of medieval combat, armor provides a rich and fascinating backdrop for humor.

Creating the perfect armor joke requires a good grasp of wordplay, a twist on expectations, and the often dramatic nature of historical battles.

For instance, the impracticality of heavy armor for everyday tasks or the irony of a ‘knight in shining armor’ in modern times.

Ready to shield yourself from a dull day?

Brace yourself for laughter with these armor jokes:

Why did the armor need a vacation? It was feeling a bit rusty!
Why was the knight wearing headphones? Because he wanted to listen to his favorite armor band!
What did the knight say when he lost his armor? “I can’t believe I’ve been disarmed!”
Why did the knight start a band? Because he wanted to be known as the knight in shining armor-rock!
Why was the knight’s armor so tight? Because it didn’t want to lose its knightly figure!
Why was the knight’s armor always late? It had a hard time getting its knight-stand clocked in!
Why did the knight refuse to wear his new armor? It didn’t suit him at all!
Why did the armor enroll in art school? It wanted to learn how to drawbridge!
What do you call a knight with a low armor class? Sir Vulnerable!
Why did the armor go to therapy? It had trouble expressing itself and was feeling a bit rusty!
Why did the armor break up with the helmet? It just couldn’t find any common “plate”!
How does a knight like his armor? Well done!
Why did the knight use bubble wrap instead of armor? He wanted to pop into battle!
What did the blacksmith say to the knight who wanted a new suit of armor? “Iron it out with me!”
What’s a knight’s favorite type of clothing? Chainmail!
What do you get when you cross a suit of armor with a snowman? Frostbite protection!
Why did the knight bring a sword to the armor shop? Because it wanted to cut down the prices!
Why did the knight wear headphones with his armor? To listen to his favorite medieval music, of course!
Why was the knight always smiling? Because his armor was shining!
How do you make armor laugh? Tick-le-mail!
What do you call a knight who loves to dance? Sir Loin, because he’s always in armor!
What’s a knight’s favorite type of armor? Chainmail-bikini armor! It has great ventilation!
Why did the knight carry a spoon in his armor? In case he had to dish out some justice!
What did the armor say to the lazy knight? “Don’t worry, I’ll carry the weight!”
How did the armor win the dance competition? It had the best knight moves!
Why did the knight refuse to upgrade his armor? He didn’t want to pay an arm and a leg!
What do you call a knight who skips leg day? Sir Dents-a-Lot, because his armor is always dented at the knees!
What did the armor say to the sword? “You’re not cutting it!”
Why do knights always bring an umbrella to battle? In case of chainmail!
Why did the armor visit the doctor? It had a bad case of metal fatigue!
What did the armor say to the clumsy knight? “You need to plate more attention!”
Why did the knight refuse to upgrade his armor? He didn’t want to shell out for an exo-suit!
Why did the knight wear an armor made of cheese? Because it was grate protection!
Why did the knight carry a piece of paper? Because he couldn’t find his armor instructions!
Why did the knight sleep with his armor on? He wanted to be on the knight watch!
Why did the knight bring a portable fan into battle? So he could have some fresh air under his armor!
How do knights get their armor to shine? They use elbow grease!
Why did the knight wear two suits of armor? Because he wanted to double his protection!
Why was the armor terrible at making friends? It was too guarded!
Why did the knight use an umbrella in battle? To protect himself from rain or shine!
Why did the knight bring his armor to the party? He wanted to show off his knightlife!
How did the knight fix his broken armor? With a medieval duct tape!
What do you call an armor that constantly complains? Plate-mailfunctioning!
Why was the armor always confident? Because it knew how to chest!
Why did the armor start a band? It wanted to become a knight-owl!
How did the knight feel after his armor got rusty? He was a little bit rusty himself!
Why did the knight refuse to wear armor made of cheese? He thought it was too grate-ful!
Why did the knight carry a stopwatch? Because he wanted to kill time!
Why did the armor start telling jokes? It wanted to lighten the mood inside the castle!
Why did the knight’s armor take up painting? It wanted to explore its metallic talent!
What did the knight say when he lost his armor at the dry cleaners? “Iron out the wrinkles!”
Why did the armor go to therapy? It had a hard time opening up to others.
What did the bossy armor say to the knight? “Suit up and get to work!”
Why don’t knights ever sweat? Because they have armor-pits!
Why did the armor go to the gym? It wanted to get a better chest plate!
What did the armor say to the sword? “I’m always here to protect you, I’ve got you covered!”
Why did the knight go to the dentist? He had a cavity in his armor!
Why did the knight wear a saucepan as armor? He couldn’t find his pot armor!
Why did the knight’s armor take up painting? It wanted to express itself in coat of arms!
What do you call a suit of armor made out of chocolate? A knight-light!
Why was the suit of armor terrible at gambling? It always lost its knights!
What kind of armor is the most fashionable? Chainmail from the catwalk!
Why did the armor blush? Because it saw the knight’s chainmail!
Why did the knight refuse to give up his armor? Because it was his shining armor, and he wasn’t ready to give up the spotlight!
Why did the armor go to the party alone? It didn’t want to be too clingy and helmet-ate everyone’s attention!
Why did the knight bring a ladder to the armor shop? Because he heard the prices were through the roof!
What do you call a knight’s favorite type of music? Armor-azing tunes!
Why did the armor take a day off from work? It needed to recharge its batteries!
What did the knight say when he lost his armor? “I’m totally defenseless!”
Why did the armor apply for a loan? It wanted to buy a castle to protect itself!
Why did the armor go to school? It wanted to learn how to shield itself from bullies!
How did the knight’s armor win an award? It was the shining star of the knight’s attire!
What did the armor say to the sword? “I’m just here to protect your point!”
Why did the knight bring a snorkel to battle? In case he got in deep water!
Why did the knight carry a suitcase full of armor? He wanted to make sure he was well-suited for any occasion!
What’s a knight’s favorite accessory? A sword-robe!
Why don’t knights ever iron their armor? Because it would be a pressing engagement!
What did the knight say when his armor felt a bit tight? “I think I’m in a bit of a plate-ness situation!”
Why did the knight wear headphones under his armor? So he could listen to his favorite suit of armor!
Why did the knight’s armor take up yoga? It wanted to achieve inner peace of plate!
Why did the knight refuse to wear armor made of cheese? Because he didn’t want to be covered in cheddar!
Why did the knight bring a ladder to battle? So he could reach the top shelf of his armor!
How did the armor feel after a long day? Exhausted, it was really plate-ed out!
Why did the knight refuse to wear shiny armor? He didn’t want to be mistaken for a disco ball on the battlefield.
Why did the knight’s armor go to the comedy club? It wanted to be a suit of armor with a great sense of humor!
What did the clumsy knight say when he accidentally dropped his armor? “Oh, I’ve made a knight-mare!”
What did the armor say to the sword? “I’m always here to protect you, we make a great chain!”
What did the knight say when his armor got rusty? “I guess I’ll have to steel myself!”
How do you make armor laugh? You tickle its metal plates.
Why did the knight use a sewing machine on his armor? Because he wanted to stitch up some protection!
How do knights clean their armor? They take it to the squire wash!
Why was the armor always getting into arguments? Because it had a lot of plate issues!
What do you call a knight who likes to sleep in his armor? Sir Snore-a-Lot!
Why did the armor refuse to go to the party? It didn’t want to get too plated!
Why did the knight wear sneakers under his armor? So he could suit up and run away quickly!
Why was the armor feeling down? It was having a rusty day.
Why was the armor always nervous? It had a lot of pressure on its shoulders!
What do you call a suit of armor that makes you laugh? A humorous knight!
What did one suit of armor say to the other? “I’m feeling a bit rusty today, I need some oil change!”
What did one piece of armor say to the other during a jousting match? “I’ve got your back, literally!”
Why did the knight always bring a pillow to battle? To protect his “armor-phobic” head!
Why did the knight refuse to fight a dragon? He didn’t have the guts!
What do you call a knight who is afraid of armor? Sir Render.
Why did the knight use fabric softener on his armor? He wanted it to be knightly soft!
What do you call armor that’s not heavy? Light armor!
Why did the armor go to the party alone? Because it didn’t need a plus-one, it was already plated!
What do you call a knight who puts on his armor wrong? Sir Clumsy!
What do you call a suit of armor that snores? Sir Rattle-a-lot!
What’s the difference between a knight and a suit of armor? One is made of steel, the other is made of chivalry.
Why did the knight get a promotion? Because he always had a suit of armor!
What did the armor say when it got a compliment? “Thanks, I’m feeling quite shielded by your words!”
Why did the armor refuse to go to the party? It didn’t want to be the knight’s shining disappointment!
What do you call a suit of armor that’s afraid of everything? A chicken in shining armor!
What do you call a suit of armor that’s always telling jokes? A knight in shining humor!
Why did the armor refuse to go on a date? It didn’t want to be vulnerable to heartbreak!
Why did the knight bring a sponge to the joust? He wanted to soak his armor in victory!
What do you call a knight in shining armor who likes to sing? A metallica!
Why did the knight bring a pillow to battle? To protect his armor from getting knightmares!
What did the knight say to the blacksmith who made his armor too small? “I can’t breathe, this is un-knight-able!”
Why did the knight refuse to wear heavy armor? He didn’t want to be the butt of all the plate mail jokes!
What did the knight say when he couldn’t find his armor? “Oh no, I’ve been disarmed!”
Why did the knight use a metal detector on his armor? He was looking for a suit of armor-ite!
Why did the knight refuse to wear pants under his armor? He didn’t want to steal the show with his shining personality!
Why did the armor start singing in the middle of battle? It wanted to be the knight’s shining armor, both literally and musically!

Short Armor Jokes

Short armor jokes are like a well-forged shield—strong, impactful, and unexpectedly humorous.

These jokes are perfect for quick text messages, social media posts, or that moment in a medieval themed party when you need a good chuckle.

The charm of short armor jokes lies in their ability to combine historical references with modern humor, delivering a laugh in just a few words.

So brace yourselves!

Here are short armor jokes that hit the funny bone with the precision of a skilled knight.

What do you call an armor that’s afraid of water? A rust-chicken!
What do you call armor made out of corn? Popcorn!
What do you call a clumsy knight’s armor? Metal disorder!
What do you call armor made out of recycled materials? Eco-knight-ic!
What did the plate armor say to the chainmail? Let’s link up!
What did the helmet say to the sword? “You complete me!”
What’s an armor’s favorite song? “Knights in White Satin!”
How does a suit of armor listen to music? It wears earplates!
What’s an armor’s favorite dance move? The Knight Shuffle!
What do you call a knight who skips leg day? Sir Hops-a-lot!
How do knights fight summer heat? They wear sunscreend armor!
What do you call armor that’s always getting injured? Accident-prone!
What do you call an armored cat? A knight-meow!
What’s the best way to steal armor? Take it by knight!
Why do knights always wear armor? Because it’s their knightly duty!
Why was the knight always getting lost? His armor was knight-mare!
What did the knight say to his armor before battle? Suit yourself!
How did the blacksmith fix his broken armor? With knight glue!
What do you call a knight without any armor? Unprotected and swordy!
What do you call an armor that won’t stop talking? Plate-ful!
Why did the knight always wear armor to bed? For knightmares!
Why did the knight carry a can opener? To open castle gates!
What do you call a knight who loves math? An armorextrician!
Why was the armor cold? It had too many open helms!
What do you call armor made out of duct tape? Medieval reinforcements!
What did the knight say when his armor broke? “This is un-sword-able!”
Why did the armor take a yoga class? To find inner peace!
Why was the knight always polite? He had impeccable armor-manners!
Why did the knight wear cologne? To smell armor-azing!
What did one suit of armor say to the other? “Nice plates!”
Why was the armor always late? It couldn’t find its knightstand!
Why did the knight wear headphones in battle? To protect his eardrums!
How does a knight stay cool during battle? By opening his visor!
What did the suit of armor say to the weapon? You’re pointy!
Why was the armor always cold? It had a steel breeze!
Why do knights always carry a shield? To stay on guard!
What’s a knight’s favorite breakfast cereal? Armor flakes!
Why did the armor go to the bakery? It kneaded some dough!
What’s a knight’s favorite piece of armor? The knightcap!

Armor Jokes One-Liners

Armor one-liner jokes are the embodiment of humor, forged in the fires of wit and condensed into a single, robust sentence.

They’re the linguistic equivalent of donning a suit of armor – strong, stylish, and undeniably impressive.

Crafting an armor one-liner demands an alloy of creativity, accuracy, and a profound respect for the smithy of language.

The challenge is to shield the setup and sharpen the punchline into a compact form, delivering a protective layer of humor with every word.

Here’s to hoping these armor one-liners find you fortified with laughter:

Why did the knight’s armor take a vacation? It needed some time to recharge its knight life.
My armor is like a second skin, except it’s more like a second skin that’s impossible to take off and causes severe chafing.
Why did the armor join a gym? It wanted to get in knight shape!
I asked my armor if it wanted a vacation, it said it’s already a knight in shining armor, what more does it need?
Why did the knight wear armor to the grocery store? Just in case there was a joust in the produce section.
Why did the knight refuse to upgrade his armor? He didn’t want to go through another “chain” reaction!
My armor is so weak, it couldn’t even protect a secret.
Why did the armor start a band? Because it wanted to create some heavy metal music!
What did the knight say when he lost his armor? “I have no body to blame but my armor!”
What do you call armor that’s been to the gym? Steel swole!
Why did the armor go to a stand-up comedy show? It wanted to get a good suit of laughter!
What do you call a suit of armor that’s been ironed? Pressed for success!
My armor is like a credit card, it always gets declined.
I tried to make my armor lighter, but it just wasn’t heavy metal enough!
My favorite armor is pajamas, because sleep is my secret weapon.
Why did the knight bring a pillow to the armor shop? He wanted to test if it was a comfy plate to sleep on!
Why did the armor win the lottery? It had a lot of knightmares, but it always had a winning chalice.
What did the knight say to his armor? “You’ve got me well-suited!”
Why did the armor go on strike? It couldn’t handle the weight anymore.
My armor is like a bad joke, it always falls flat.
I bought some armor that was on sale, but it turned out to be a real steal.
What do you call an armor-clad comedian? A knight of hilarity!
Armor can protect you from a lot of things, but it’s no match for a really bad hair day.
Why was the armor so great at telling jokes? It always had a funny bone!
Why do knights always carry a shield? Because they can’t knight-imagine life without it!
I wear my armor to the grocery store, you never know when you’ll need protection from flying shopping carts.
Why did the knight return his new armor? It didn’t suit his knightly tastes!
What did the knight say to his armor? “I can’t live without you, you’re plate-fully essential!”
Why did the armor become a comedian? Because it wanted to prove that it had a sharp wit!
I bought a discount suit of armor, turns out it was knightwear.
Why did the knight wear a tutu over his armor? He wanted to be a ballet knight!
Why did the knight wear a colander instead of a helmet? Because he wanted to be a pasta-plate warrior!
Why did the armor become a stand-up comedian? It wanted to get some laughs out of its plate mail!
What’s a knight’s favorite type of armor? Chain mail, because it’s off the chain!
What do you call a knight with a broken sword and rusty armor? Sir Rusted Blade!
Why did the knight love his armor so much? It was his knight in shining exoskeleton!
I was going to wear armor to the party, but I didn’t want to be the party’s coat of arms.
They say the best armor is a good defense lawyer.
Why did the knight take his armor to the dentist? It had a few cav-plates!
What did the knight say to his rusty armor? “I guess we’re just a little bit rusty, pal!”
Why did the knight bring a pillow to the joust? He wanted a soft landing in case he fell out of armor.
I tried wearing armor to a wedding, but I was still the best man.
I told my armor to do the heavy lifting, but apparently it’s only good at deflecting insults.
What do you call a suit of armor that’s been pushed down the stairs? A medieval tumbleweed!
Why did the knight refuse to wear the invisible armor? He said he couldn’t see himself in it!
What’s the most fashionable type of armor? Chainmail made from recycled soda can tabs. It’s soda-lightful!
My armor is so old, it has a built-in chamber pot.
The suit of armor was feeling a bit rusty, so it decided to go on a vacation to the beach.
I wanted to buy armor for my pet turtle, but it said “shell” out.
Why did the armor start a YouTube channel? It wanted to show off its knightly moves.
My armor is so strong, it once survived a direct hit from a Nerf gun.
Why did the knight bring a spoon to the battle? He heard it was the ultimate armor-piercing weapon!
Why was the knight sent to detention? He couldn’t keep his armor together!
What did the clumsy knight say after tripping in his armor? “I’ve fallen and I can’t giddy up!”
Why did the suit of armor go to therapy? It was feeling a bit rusty on the inside.
I asked the blacksmith to make me some armor, but he only made me a knight light.
What is the armor’s favorite type of music? Heavy metal, of course!
Why did the knight use a salad spinner as armor? He wanted to be a well-dressed salad knight!
The armor was so heavy that the knight needed a cheat sheet to remember how to walk.
I asked my armor if it wanted to go out, but it said it was already plate-d.
What did the overprotective armor say to its knight? “I’ve got you covered, literally!”
What is a knight’s favorite type of armor? Chainmaille-order!
I asked my armor if it was feeling rusty, but it just gave me the cold shoulder.
What did the knight say when his armor was feeling down? “Don’t worry, I’ll plate you up with compliments!”
Why did the suit of armor go to therapy? It had a lot of unresolved metal issues!
What did the plate armor say to the chainmail? Nice chain reaction!
What do you call a suit of armor that’s too small? A knightgown!
I asked my armor if it wanted to hang out, but it said it was feeling a bit rusty.
Why did the knight bring a pillow to the armor store? He wanted to try out sleep mode!
The knight’s armor was so shiny, it made the sun feel like an amateur spotlight.
Why do knights always carry a spare set of armor? In case they misplace their chain mail.
I tried using armor as a pickup line, but apparently, “Are you made of metal? Because you’ve captured my heart!” doesn’t work as well as I hoped.
Why did the knight wear a feathered helmet? To keep his thoughts on the plume!
My armor is so shiny, it could blind a dragon!
Why did the knight always bring a can of paint with him? He wanted to coat his armor in shining colors!
I tried to put on my armor, but it said it was feeling rusty. I guess it was having a knight off.
What do you get when you cross a suit of armor with a fire extinguisher? A knight in shining armor who’s always ready to extinguish the heat!
Why did the knight wear a colander as armor? He wanted to be prepared for a spaghetti attack.
Why did the knight wear a colander as armor? Because he wanted to strain the enemy’s attacks!
What do you call a suit of armor that keeps singing? A knightingale!
I thought about joining a metal band, but I already have enough armor to protect my eardrums from their music.
Why did the knight take his armor to the gym? Because he wanted to work on his knightly abs!
Why was the knight always ready for battle? He had a knight light!
Why did the knight buy a mirror for his armor? So it could reflect on its mistakes!
Why did the knight always carry extra armor? Just in case he needed a spare rib!
Why did the armor go to the comedy club? It wanted to be the knight’s funny bone!
Why did the knight wear his armor to the restaurant? He wanted to have a plate in shining armor!
What’s an armor’s favorite musical instrument? The trom-bone.
Why did the armor go to the party alone? It didn’t want to bring any chain-mail!
What did one suit of armor say to the other suit of armor? “Nice to meet you, I’m pretty metal myself!”
I asked my armor if it needed any repairs, but it said it was fine, it’s just battle scarred.
Why did the knight cover himself in tin foil? He wanted to be an armored baked potato!
Why did the armor go to therapy? Because it had some serious metal health issues!
Sometimes I wonder if knights had to deal with dry cleaning bills for their armor.
What’s a knight’s favorite type of armor? Chainmail-biting armor!
I told my wife I wanted to wear armor to bed, she said it was a knight-mare!
Why did the armor go to the comedy show? It wanted to see if it could “steel” the spotlight!
Why did the knight turn down a job offer from the blacksmith? He didn’t want to forge-t his armor!
I wanted to join the Armor Club, but they said I wasn’t metal enough.
What do you call armor that talks back? Sass of plates.
Why did the armor go to the comedy club? It wanted to showcase its knight moves.
What do you call a cow wearing armor? Sir Loin!
My armor is always up for a good battle, it’s got a knight-itude problem.
Why did the armor go to school? It wanted to improve its knight life!
Why did the armor join a band? Because it had a great sense of metal.
Why did the armor enroll in a cooking class? It wanted to learn how to make plated armor!
Why did the armor take up painting? It wanted to brush up on its defense skills!
My armor is my fashion statement, it screams “I’m ready for battle!” or “I’m too lazy to do laundry!”
What’s a knight’s favorite dance move? The armor roll!
I accidentally wore my armor to a wedding, now everyone thinks I’m a knight in shining armor.
What did one suit of armor say to the other suit of armor? “I’ve got your back…plate!”
What did the armor say when it got a promotion? “I’m moving up the ranks… and the body!”
I told my armor a joke, but it didn’t laugh. It must have had a knightmare sense of humor.
Why did the knight keep losing his armor? Because he had a “knight”mare finding it!
Why did the armor file a complaint? It felt like it was constantly being taken for granted.
What do you call a knight who likes to wear shiny armor and sing? A medieval pop star!
I asked a suit of armor if it wanted to go out for drinks, but it said it was a little rusty in the dating department.
Why did the knight wear a feathered hat with his armor? Because he wanted to be a “plume” knight!
What did the knight say when he saw his armor covered in dust? “This is a knightmare!”
Why did the knight wear a helmet while eating? He didn’t want to get a sir-loin injury.
I tried wearing armor to work, but my boss said it was an inappropriate chain of dress.
Why did the armor go on a diet? It wanted to be a lean, mean, fighting machine!
How do you make armor out of cheese? You use provolone protection!
They say I have a thick skin, but I prefer to call it my armor against stupid comments.
I met a knight who was always wearing armor, turns out he was just trying to steel the show.
What do you call a suit of armor that’s really good at math? An alge-bra.
If you can’t find your armor, just wear a suit of bubble wrap – it’s the modern knight’s choice.
Why did the armadillo wear medieval armor? To protect his knight-ure!
Why was the armor always nervous? It had too many “steel”ings!
I wore my armor to a party, but it was a real drag knight.
Why was the armor always tired? Because it was always under a lot of chain-stress!
My armor and I have a love-hate relationship, it loves protecting me, and I hate putting it on before going to the bathroom.
My armor said it was feeling lonely, so I told it to join the knight life and make some plate-mates.
Why do knights always carry a towel with them? In case they get a little armor-ous!
Why did the knight refuse to wear armor on a hot day? He didn’t want to sweat it out!
Why did the knight carry a piece of bread with him? In case he got hungry during battle, he could have a suit of toast armor!
Why did the knight bring a ladder to the battlefield? Because he wanted to reach the high ground, of course!
Why did the knight prefer wearing lightweight armor? He didn’t want to feel weighed down by his knight duties.
I wanted to buy some armor, but the salesman told me it was plate-fully expensive.
Why did the knight use a calculator in battle? Because he needed to multiply his armor!
Why did the scarecrow wear armor? Because it heard it was outstanding in its field!
Why did the armor go to the gym? It wanted to pump some iron-knight.
My armor always complains about being heavy, but I guess it’s just plate-ing around.
I tried to impress a girl by wearing armor, but she said I was just being a shield.
Why did the knight wear a helmet at the dinner table? Because he didn’t want any soup-er accidents!
Why did the suit of armor always win at poker? Because it had a steel poker face!
I tried using armor as a fashion statement, but it just didn’t suit me.
The best way to stay fashionable in battle is to accessorize your armor with a feather boa.
Why do knights always carry a tissue in their armor? In case they have a chainmail-gedon.
Why did the knight bring a ladder to the battlefield? Because he wanted to reach new heights in armor fashion!

Armor Dad Jokes

Armor dad jokes offer a hilarious twist of humor and chivalry that will certainly make you chuckle and roll your eyes simultaneously.

These are the sort of jokes that are so corny, they’re actually funny.

Perfect for history buffs, medieval enthusiasts, or simply for those moments when you want to lighten the mood with some playful banter.

Prepare for the chuckles and eye-rolls.

Here are some armor dad jokes that are guaranteed to entertain:

Why did the knight wear a metal suit? Because he didn’t trust his chain mail!
What did the knight say to his armor when it was feeling down? “Don’t worry, I’ll always be your shining knight!”
What did the knight say when he put on his new armor? This suits me just right!
What do you call a suit of armor with a cold? An iron-sick man!
Why did the knight wear a helmet at the dinner table? In case someone tried to steel his food!
Why do knights never fight with a broken sword? Because they don’t want to get caught off-guard!
What do you call a suit of armor that likes to sing? A knighting-gale!
Why did the armor take up gardening? It wanted to grow some plate-mail flowers!
What’s a knight’s favorite part of their armor? The shoulder pads, because they’re always there for support!
Why was the suit of armor always late for battle? It had trouble finding the right chest piece!
Why did the knight bring a pillow to the armor shop? Because he wanted to protect his knight’s sleep!
Why did the knight have a metal helmet? Because he didn’t trust his memory foam one to remember all his battles.
What do you call a suit of armor that’s falling apart? Sir Rattle!
What did the knight say to his armor before battle? “Don’t worry, I’ll shield you from harm!”
Why did the knight become an armor designer? Because he had a real metal for fashion!
How do knights clean their armor? They give it a good knight’s scrub!
Why did the armor go to school? It wanted to learn how to “suit” (shoot) the breeze!
What did the armor say to the sword during their argument? “Don’t try to cut me off, I’ve got you covered!”
Why did the knight open a bakery? He wanted to make some knight loaves!
Why was the knight’s armor never hungry? It had a full plate!
Why did the armor take a vacation? It needed some time to plate and relax!
Why did the knight’s armor always have dents? Because it couldn’t dodge a medieval traffic ticket!
How do you make heavy armor light? Take off the ‘h’ and ‘y’!
What do you call armor that never complains? Silent plate!
Why did the blacksmith become an expert in making armor? He had a real knack for metal health!
Why do knights always carry extra armor? In case they get a little rusty!
Why did the knight always bring a spare set of armor? He believed in being prepared for a joust in case of emergency!
Why did the knight go to the blacksmith to fix his armor? Because it was a little rusty!
Why did the knight bring a boombox to the castle? Because he wanted to play heavy metal music!
What do you call an armadillo wearing full plate armor? An armoredillo!
Why did the suit of armor go to the comedy club? It wanted to work on its stand-up shield!
Why did the knight’s armor have a good sense of humor? Because it was always up for a good knight’s laugh!
Why did the knight never forget his armor at home? Because it was his knight in shining armor!
What do you call a knight who likes to sing while wearing armor? A metal vocalist!
Why did the knight always wear a helmet to bed? Because he wanted to protect his dreams of slaying dragons!
What did the knight say when he lost his armor in battle? “I guess I’m unarmed!”
Why do armored knights make good comedians? Because they always have a knightly sense of humor!
What did the suit of armor say when it got promoted? “I’ve been knighted for my hard work!”
Why did the knight start a gardening business? Because he wanted to be surrounded by suit of flowers!
Why did the knight’s armor always get in trouble at school? Because it kept raising a shield during exams!
Why did the armor go to therapy? It had trouble opening up and showing its vulnerable side!
Why was the armor sad? Because it felt a little rusty!
Why do knights always carry a towel with them? In case they have to joust in the wet armor!
Why did the knight carry a shield made of cheese? Because he wanted to be protected by cheddar armor!
Why was the knight so good at his job? He always had a suit of armor and a lance in case of emergency!
Why did the knight switch to a lighter armor? He couldn’t handle the heavy metal!
Why did the knight bring a mirror to the duel? So he could see his opponent’s armor reflection!
Why was the armor always cold? Because it couldn’t find its thermal knight-ies!
How do knights stay in shape? They do medieval exercise: lifting armor!
Why did the knight take up blacksmithing? He wanted to forge ahead!
Why did the armor go to the gym? It wanted to get “steel”ed (steeled) for battle!
Why did the armor go to therapy? It needed help with its knightmares!
Why was the knight always out of breath during battles? Because his armor was a little too knight-fitting!
What did one suit of armor say to the other after a long day of battle? “I’m exhausted, it’s been a plateful!”
Why do knights never go on a diet? They believe that armor adds to their knightly figure!
What did the armor say when it found a dent? “Oh sheet metal!”
How did the knight feel after winning a jousting tournament? He was a-peel-ed with his armor performance!
Why was the suit of armor always in demand? Because it knew how to steel the show!
Why did the knight take up gardening? Because he wanted to wear suit of armoire!
Why did the knight bring extra armor to the joust? In case he got a little too medieval!
How does a knight keep his armor shiny? He uses knight-cleaning products!
What did the armor say to the sword? “I’ve got you covered, you can count on me!”
What do you call a suit of armor that’s afraid of thunderstorms? A knight-light!
Why did the armor become a chef? It wanted to make plate armor!
What did the knight say when he bought new armor? This fits me to a T!
Why did the armor go to the therapist? It had serious plate issues!
Why did the knight wear a helmet at the dinner table? To protect his knight cap!
Why did the suit of armor go to the beach? It wanted to catch some rays!
What did one piece of armor say to the other piece of armor at the party? “I’m feeling a bit rusty!”
Why did the knight refuse to fight with rusty armor? He didn’t want to be a knight-err-rust!
What do you call a suit of armor made out of recycled soda cans? A knight in shining Coca-Cola!
Why do knights always carry a pen and paper with them in battle? So they can take notes on their swordsmanship!
What do you call a group of knights in shiny armor? A tin-credible ensemble!
Why was the armor not good at making decisions? Because it was always on the fence!
Why did the knight wear a helmet to bed? So he could protect his dreams of being a hero!
Why did the armor refuse to go on a diet? Because it was already plate full!
How do knights clean their armor? They use knight-erol!
Why did the knight always carry a map? So he wouldn’t get “mail” (mailed) in the armor!
Why did the knight refuse to fight in the rain? He didn’t want his armor to get a little rusty!
Why did the armor break up with its girlfriend? She said it was too knight-tractive!
Why did the knight bring a ladder to the battle? Because he heard the enemy had a suit of high armor!
Why did the knight refuse to wear heavy armor? Because he didn’t want to feel weighed down by his jokes!
What did the armor say to the sword during their argument? “I’m just trying to plate my part!”
What did the knight say when he put on his armor? “I’m ready to battle!” .
What did the knight say when he couldn’t find his armor? “I guess it’s time to metal detective!”
What do you call a knight who likes to be funny? Sir Pranks-a-Lot!
Why was the suit of armor a great comedian? Because it had the best knight-life!
What do you call a knight who wears armor made of cheese? Sir Loin of Cheddar!
Why did the armor go to the dentist? It needed a knight-cap!
What do you call an armor that can sing? A knightingale!
Why did the knight always wear a helmet? Because it was his crowning glory!
What did the armor say to the knight who couldn’t decide which helmet to wear? “Just pick one and stop being so indecisive, you’re giving me a headache!”
Why did the knight wear a tin foil hat? To protect himself from medieval mind control!
What did the suit of armor say when it got a promotion? “I’ve finally been knighted!”
Why did the armor file a complaint? It felt a little rusty!
What do you call a suit of armor that’s always on time? Punctual plate mail!
Why was the armor always so calm? Because it knew how to keep its cool under pressure!
Why was the knight always so confident in battle? Because he had a suit of armor!
What did one suit of armor say to the other suit of armor? “I can’t help but feel a little metal-dramatic today!”
Why did the knight wear a suit of armor to the dinner party? He wanted to make a good first impression and be the knight in shining armor!
How do knights like their armor? Well done!
Why did the knight always wear armor while cooking? Because he didn’t want to get too hot and plate!
How does a knight get his armor clean? He puts it through the squire-eez cycle!
Why did the armor go to the music concert? It wanted to hear some heavy metal!
What do you call it when a knight accidentally puts his armor on backward? A knight in rear armor!
Why do knights wear shiny armor? It’s their knightly duty to reflect greatness!
Why did the knight always wear shiny armor? Because he wanted to reflect on his achievements!
Why did the knight always carry a map? Because he didn’t want to get lost in his armor!
Why did the armor get a ticket? It was caught speeding in the plate!
Why was the knight always so calm during battle? He had a strong suit of armor, which gave him a lot of plating-itude!
Why did the armor become a comedian? It wanted to shield people with laughter!
Why did the knight have a hard time finding a date? Because he couldn’t find anyone who could armor his heart!
Why did the knight wear an extra pair of pants under his armor? Just in case he got a little rusty!
Why did the knight bring a spoon to battle? In case he had to armor up with a soup plate!
What did the armor say to the sword during a duel? “I’ve got you covered!”
Why did the blacksmith become an armorer? Because he wanted a riveting career!
Why did the armor take a break from fighting? It needed some time to steel itself!
Why did the knight always carry a mirror with him? So he could reflect on his armor’s shine!
Why was the armor always confident? It had a strong self-steel!
Why did the knight refuse to fight without his armor? He didn’t want to feel defenseless!
Why was the knight’s armor always squeaking? Because it needed a little “oil of armor”!
Why was the armor feeling down? It was going through a tough plate!
Why did the knight bring a spoon to the armor shop? Because he heard they had plate specials!
Why did the knight bring his armor to the barbecue? He wanted to grill up some serious protection!
What kind of armor do you wear to a fancy party? A tuxi-knight!
What do you call a knight who likes to play video games in his armor? Sir-ious gamer!
Why did the knight wear headphones while in battle? Because he wanted to listen to his favorite metal band!
What did the knight say when he put on his new suit of armor? “It fits me like a gauntlet!”
Why do knights never sweat in battle? Because they have full metal jackets!
Why did the knight always have a second set of armor? Just in case he had to go out on a double date!
Why was the armor cold? Because it was made of “brass” (brass)!
What did one suit of armor say to the other suit of armor? “I love your metal physique, you’re a real shining knight!”
Why did the suit of armor get a job as a security guard? Because it was tired of being taken for granite!
What do you call a knight who skips arm day at the gym? Sir Not-so-strong!
Why did the armor go to the comedy club? Because it wanted to get some laughs, plate and simple!
Why did the knight invest in heavy armor? He wanted to be knight-rich!
What did the knight say when his armor started talking to him? “Sir-prise!”
What do you call a suit of armor that’s been hit by lightning? Shocking!
How do you repair a broken suit of armor? With knight glue!
Why did the armor join a yoga class? Because it wanted to improve its warrior pose!
Why did the knight bring a map to battle? He wanted to make sure he didn’t armor-y himself in the wrong direction!
Why did the armor go to the beach? Because it wanted to get a tan-line of defense!
Why don’t knights like to wear heavy armor? It’s just too plate-ful!
How does a suit of armor like to relax? By watching medieval sitcoms – it finds them truly knight-tertaining!
Why did the armor go to therapy? Because it had too many layers of emotional protection!
Why did the knight always carry a pencil with him? In case he had to draw his sword and sketch his armor!
Why did the knight switch to wearing leather armor? He wanted to be a bit more flexible in his knightly pursuits!
Why did the armor join a band? Because it had a metallic voice and wanted to be a heavy metal star!
Why did the armor get a promotion? It always knew how to protect and chest the right way!
What did the armor say when it won the lottery? I’m going to be rich in knighted currency!
Why was the armor feeling down? It couldn’t plate up to the expectations!

Armor Jokes for Kids

Armor jokes for kids are the shining knights of the joke world – safe, shiny, and always a crowd-pleaser among the little ones.

These jokes encourage children to learn about history and medieval times in a fun and interactive manner, promoting a fascination for the past that’s as strong as the armor itself.

Plus, armor jokes for kids have the extra advantage of making learning history enjoyable, transforming that tough suit of armor into a source of giggles.

Ready for a joust of jests?

Here are the jokes that’ll have them laughing in their imaginary castles:

Why was the knight so good at math? Because he could count on his armor!
What did the armor say when it fell over? “I’ve fallen and I can’t get up!”
Why did the knight take a nap in his armor? He wanted to recharge his knight’s sleep!
What did the knight say when his armor got rusty? “I’m feeling a bit rusty today!”
Why did the knight bring a ladder to battle? Because he heard the enemy was really good at scaling walls!
Why did the armor bring a calculator to the joust? To count its chainmail links!
Why did the armor become an artist? It wanted to draw out its true knight-ure!
What do you call armor made out of cheese? Gouda knight’s protection!
Why did the knight wear a helmet? To protect his “knoggin” from getting knocked!
How do you weigh a suit of armor? With a knight-scale!
Why did the armor go to the party? It heard there was going to be some “knight”-time fun!
Why do knights always bring a sword to bed? In case they have to fight a knight-mare!
Why did the armor take a vacation? It needed a little “knight” off!
What do you call a knight with no armor? Unarmed and dangerous!
Why did the knight go to the dentist? He had a suit of armorache!
What did the knight say when he found out he had a dentist appointment? “I don’t have time for this! I’m already wearing enough armor!”
Why did the knight refuse to fight with a sword? He wanted a joust-tle instead!
What do you call a knight with a sore throat? Sir Cough-a-Lot!
What do you call a knight who likes to recycle? Sir Cumference, because he always goes around in circles!
Why did the armor go to the bakery? It heard they had great rolls!
Why did the armor go to the party? It wanted to show off its metal moves on the dance floor!
What did the armor say to the sword? “Don’t get rusty on me!”
What did the armor say to the sword? “You can’t pierce my knightly pride!”
What did the knight say to the heavy armor? “You’ve really got me weighed down!”
Why did the armor go to the doctor? It had a case of the iron-deficiency!
What do you call a knight who loves taking naps in his armor? Sir Slumberlot!
Why do knights always wear armor? Because it’s the knight thing to do!
Why did the knight go to school? To armor himself with knowledge!
How do you clean a suit of armor? With knight-club soda!
Why did the armor go to the bakery? It wanted a little extra dough for protection!
What do you call a knight that likes to sing? Sir Rhythm of the Round Table!
To clean up all the armored mess!
Why did the knight always carry a map? So he could find his way through the plate mail!
What do you call a knight who likes to make armor out of pasta? Sir Loin!
Why did the knight wear armor to bed? In case he had a knightmare!
How do knights party? They go to a masquerade ball!
Sword-ered mushrooms!
Why did the knight take his armor to the barber? Because he wanted a suit of armor with a good crew cut!
Because he wanted to be a super-knight!
How do you make a suit of armor laugh? Tick-le its funny bone!
What kind of armor do bees wear? Buzz-kets!
Heavy metal!
Why did the knight start a gardening club? Because he wanted to grow his own suits of armor!
What do you call a knight who wears tin foil armor? Sir Crinkle!
Why did the knight always carry a pen and paper with his armor? To jot down his knight-mares!
Why did the knight bring a ladder to the castle? Because he heard the steaks were really high!
How does a suit of armor get its shine? It uses knight cream!
What do you call a knight who loves to sing? A medieval pop-star!
Why did the knight always carry a shield? So he could always defend his good jokes!
What did one armor say to the other armor at the gym? “I’m feeling so plated!”
His knight-in-shining-armor!
What did the armor say to the dragon? “You can’t handle this kind of heat!”
Why did the knight bring a pen and paper to the battle? So he could draw his “sword” skills!
What do you call a nervous suit of armor? A knight in shinning armor!
Why did the armor bring a pillow to the battle? It wanted to make sure it had a good knight’s sleep!
Why did the knight bring a ladder to the battlefield? To get a head above the rest!
Why was the knight always polite and well-mannered? Because he had knightly armor!
Let’s armor up and get medieval!
What do you call a knight in shining armor who keeps breaking his sword? Sir Rend-a-lot!
What did the knight say to his shiny armor? “You’re my knight in shining armor!”
Why did the knight carry a bar of soap? Because he wanted to be a knight in shining armor!
Why did the armor go to the party? Because it wanted to have a steel-ing good time!
Is it just me, or is it getting a bit rusty in here?
Why did the knight take a nap in his armor? Because he wanted to catch up on his “knight”mares!
Why did the knight wear armor to the party? Because he wanted to make a grand entrance!
Why did the knight’s armor go to school? To get an A+ in self-defense!
Why did the knight always carry a shield? Because he wanted to be board in battle!
What did the knight say when his armor was too tight? “I need a little more knightwear!”
Why was the knight so good at basketball? He always had a knight-shield!
Why did the knight bring a ladder to the battle? Because he wanted to be the first to reach the upper armor!
Why did the knight wear armor in the summer? He didn’t want to feel the heat of battle!
What do you call a snail in a suit of armor? A slow-moving tank!
Why do knights always carry a shield? To protect themselves from dragon-sneezes!
What kind of armor does a musician wear? A knight’s suit of armor!
Why did the knight wear his armor in the bakery? Because he wanted to make sure his rolls were protected!
What did the suit of armor say to the sword? “You’ve got a point there!”
Why do knights never sweat? They have a suit of armor to keep them cool!
Why did the armor go to school? To get a little extra knight education!
How does a knight stay cool in battle? By using his ar-mister!
What do you call a knight’s favorite fish? A swordfish!
Why did the armor go to the party alone? Because it couldn’t find its knight-in-shining-armour!
Why did the suit of armor go to the party? Because it wanted to be the “life” of the party!
Why did the knight take up gardening? He wanted to grow armor-plated flowers!
Tickle its funny bone!
Why did the armor go to the party? It wanted to shine and armor-aze everyone!
What’s a knight’s favorite type of armor? S’mores! Because they’re delicious and knight-worthy!
Why did the knight take up painting? He wanted to create masterpieces on ar-t!
Why did the knight bring a feather to the battle? So he could tickle his enemies into surrendering!
How does a knight like his eggs? A little bit armored!
Why did the knight always wear a helmet? To protect his thoughts from being knight-mares!
Why did the knight go to school? To improve his knightmare!
Why did the armor bring a map to the battlefield? It didn’t want to get caught off-guard!
Why did the armor go to school? Because it wanted to be a knight in shining knowledge!
Why did the knight always bring a pencil to battle? To draw his sword in case of emergency armor repair!
What do you call a knight who likes to sing and dance? Sir Lancelot of the Dance Floor!
What do you call a knight’s favorite shoes? Steel-toed boots!
Give it a knight-cap!
Why did the knight always wear a metal suit? He didn’t trust his squires to iron his clothes!
Why was the suit of armor all wet? Because it went for a swim in the knight’s bathtub!
How do knights like to get around? In shining armor-mobiles!
Why did the knight take a shower in his armor? He wanted to keep a shining reputation!
What kind of armor does a knight wear when he’s going to a party? A tuxedo!
How do you make a suit of armor comfy? Add some knight cream!
What’s a knight’s favorite type of pet? An armadillo!
Why did the armor break up with the sword? Because it found someone more polished!
Why did the knight always carry a mirror with him? So he could see himself in shining armor!
How does a knight in shining armor start a conversation? With a knight cap!
Why did the armor go to the beach? Because it wanted to show off its “shielding” skills in the sun!
Why did the knight bring a sponge to the jousting tournament? He wanted to soak up the competition!
How do knights like their armor? In shining, armorous!
Why did the armor go to the party? Because it heard there would be a knight of fun!
How do knights like their armor? Steel-ed with a kiss of protection!
Why did the knight bring a pillow to the battlefield? To cushion the enemy’s blows!
Why did the knight sleep with a knife? Because he wanted to have sweet dreams!
Because he wanted to reach new heights in armor!
What do you call a clumsy knight in heavy armor? Sir Stumble-a-lot!
Why did the armor refuse to fight? It didn’t want to rustle any feathers!
Why did the knight refuse to fight the dragon? Because he didn’t want to get his armor all fired up!
Why did the knight always carry a mirror with him? So he could check his reflection before charging into battle!
What do you call a group of knights who play music together? A medieval band of armor-ists!
Why did the armor go to the party alone? It didn’t want to be protected by anyone else!
What do you get if you cross a knight and a shellfish? A suit of armor that’s lobster-proof!
What do you call a knight who gets all the ladies? Sir Cumference!
Why did the knight wear armor to bed? To protect himself from nightmares!
Why did the knight go to school? To learn how to armor-plate his knowledge!
Why did the armor go to the art museum? Because it wanted to see some medieval masterpieces!
Why did the knight bring a compass on his quest? So he wouldn’t lose his sense of direction!
What do you call a knight who gets his armor polished every day? Sir Face!

Armor Jokes for Adults

Who says adults can’t enjoy a good armor joke?

Armor jokes for adults aim to sharpen your wit, merging intelligent humor with a hint of audacity.

Just like a well-constructed suit of armor, these jokes assemble elements of humor, intellect, and a sprinkle of daring for a remarkable chuckle.

These jokes are perfect for medieval themed parties, history buff gatherings, or simply to infuse a bit of humor into a serious chat among friends.

Here are some armor jokes that are tailored for adults:

What do you call a knight who loves spicy food? Sir Racha, the fiery armor-clad warrior!
How does a suit of armor stay healthy? It takes lots of iron in its diet!
Why did the knight wear a shiny suit of armor? He wanted to make a knight out of himself!
Why did the knight wear a colander on his head instead of a helmet? He wanted to protect his thoughts from getting too drained!
Why was the knight always sleepy? He couldn’t get his armor-rest!
Why did the knight always carry a pillow? For extra cushioning in his armor!
Why was the suit of armor always the life of the party? Because it was always suited up!
What did the armor say when it was feeling down? “I’m just feeling a little rusty today!”
What do you call a suit of armor that’s always getting into trouble? A knight mare!
Why did the armor start working out? It wanted to be stronger than steel, more buff than bronze!
Why did the armor get a part-time job? It needed some extra chain-mail!
What did one suit of armor say to the other at a party? “Let’s get this knight started!”
Why did the armor become a comedian? It wanted to add some knight humor to the world!
What do you call a suit of armor that’s been through battle? Rust in peace!
Why did the armor go to the gym? It wanted to strengthen its core, but all it got was a rusty six-pack!
Why did the knight refuse to wear his armor during summer? He didn’t want to sweat like a squire!
What did the armor say to the sword? I’m your biggest fan, but I won’t be your shield!
Why did the knight carry an umbrella with his armor? Because he wanted to be protected from both rain and swordplay!
What did the knight say to his rusty armor? “I’ve had enough of your iron-y!”
Why did the armor make a great chef? It always had a suit of armor to grill!
Why did the knight put his armor in the freezer? Because he wanted a cold plate armor!
Why did the knight bring duct tape to the battle? To patch up his suit of armor!
Why did the knight refuse to wear his armor? He didn’t want to be a knight in shining armor, he preferred being a knight in tarnished armor!
What did the knight say to the armor at the party? “You’re a knight to remember!”
Why did the knight use duct tape on his armor? He wanted to make it knight-proof!
Why did the armor break up with its partner? It felt too con-stricting!
Why did the armor get a promotion? It always went above and beyond the call of duty!
Why did the knight have trouble picking up his sword while wearing his armor? He couldn’t find the right armor-pit!
What do you call a knight who’s always ready for a party? Sir Prizefighter!
Why did the knight bring his armor to the casino? He wanted to try his luck in a suit of armor!
What’s a knight’s favorite type of armor? Tupperware, because it keeps everything fresh!
Why did the knight’s armor refuse to go out in the rain? It didn’t want to get rusty and be called a “sore knight”!
What did the knight say when he got stuck in his armor? “I’m a little armored, but I’m okay!”
Why did the knight bring his phone into battle? He heard it had great armor protection!
What did the knight say when the armor fell off? Well, that’s one way to de-vest in battle!
Why did the blacksmith refuse to make armor for the chicken? He said it was too much poultry in motion!
Why did the knight always win at poker? He had the best suit of armor!
Why did the armor go to therapy? It needed some chest-plate counseling!
What do you call a knight who sleeps all day in his armor? Sir Naps-a-lot!
Why did the armor apply for a job at the bakery? It wanted to get a little dough for itself!
Why did the armor become a stand-up comedian? It wanted to prove that it could take a joke!
What did the knight say when he couldn’t find his armor? “Squire, where art thou?”
Why did the blacksmith’s wife divorce him? She couldn’t handle his iron-clad armor obsession!
Why did the armor go to therapy? It was having an identity crisis!
Why did the knight refuse to wear armor on his legs? He didn’t want to be known as Sir Cumference!
Why did the knight’s armor go on a diet? It wanted to shed some plate-lets!
What did one suit of armor say to the other at the Renaissance fair? “I’m tired of being a knight, let’s go grab a drink!”
Why did the armor go to the dentist? It needed a knight guard for its teeth!
Why was the armor always polite? It had good knight-manners!
Why did the knight wear a pot on his head? Because he wanted to be a soup-erhero!
Why don’t knights ever get lost? They always have their armor to navigate with!
What do you call a lazy knight who never wears armor? Sir Cumference!
Why did the armor start a workout routine? It wanted to tone its abs-solutely invincible core!
Why did the blacksmith make armor out of chocolate? So the knights could have a sweet defense!
What do you call a knight who skips armor practice? Sir Ously Underprepared!
Why did the armor go to therapy? It had trouble expressing itself and felt too armored up!
Why did the knight bring his armor to the restaurant? He wanted to knightly protect his plate from falling food!
Why did the armor go to the gym? It wanted to be more well-suited!
What did one suit of armor say to the other? “I love being your breastplate friend!”
How did the armor feel when it couldn’t find its helmet? It was “crestfallen”!
Why did the armor go to the casino? It wanted to try its luck at blackjack, but unfortunately, it couldn’t deal with the cards!
How did the knight feel after losing his armor in battle? He was disarmed and disheartened!
Why did the knight’s armor start a side business? It wanted to make some extra chain-mail!
Why did the armor file a complaint against the knight? It said he was constantly weighing it down with his problems!
What’s the favorite genre of music for armor? Heavy metal, of course!
Why did the knight become an armorer? He wanted to make a living by suiting up!
Why was the armor always late for battle? It had a hard time putting itself together!
Why did the armor break up with the knight? It realized it could find someone who suited it better!
Why did the knight bring a sandwich to the battle? He wanted to have a knight’s lunch!
Why did the knight go to the dentist? He needed a knight guard!
Why did the suit of armor go on a diet? It wanted to lose a few pounds of plate!
What did the armor say to the knight when it got rusty? “I’m feeling a little crusty today, can you oil me up?”
Why did the knight refuse to wear chainmail? He didn’t want to be linked to anything serious!
Why did the knight refuse to wear a helmet? He didn’t want to lose his head over it!
Why did the knight wear a suit of armor to bed? He wanted to have knightmares in style!
Why did the suit of armor start a band? Because it wanted to be the heaviest metal group in history!
Why did the armor refuse to play cards? It didn’t want to lose its suit!
What do you call a knight with a honey addiction? Sir Oup!
What do you call a knight who only wears armor made of vegetables? A salad-in-shining-armor!
Why was the armor always confident? It had a solid sense of steel-worth!
Why did the armor start going to the gym? It wanted to tone up and become a “knight” in shining armor!
What did the armor say to the sword? “I’m always here to protect you, so you better not take me for granted!”
Why did the knight wear his armor to bed? He wanted to have sweet dreams of armor-clashing battles!
Why did the knight always bring a mirror into battle? So he could reflect on his armor choices!
Why did the knight go to the blacksmith? He needed to get his armor ironed out!
Why did the knight only wear half of his armor? He wanted to save the other half for his “knight” out!
What did the armor say to the knight when it was put on? “I’ve got your back, literally!”
Why did the armor apply for a job? It wanted to work as a “knight” watchman!
Why did the armor join a band? Because it knew how to rock and shield!
Why did the knight wear an oven mitt instead of a gauntlet? He wanted to be a knight in shining armor and baking sheets!
Why did the knight always wear a helmet during dinner? He didn’t want his soup to become armor-ghetti!
Why did the knight carry a can opener? To get out of his tin can armor!
Why did the knight wear an extra breastplate to the party? He wanted to make a good first-impression, a chest-plate!
Why did the knight carry a piece of armor with him all the time? He wanted to be well-armed!
What did the blacksmith say to the knight who ordered a custom-made suit of armor? “I hope you have a knightmare trying to take it off!”
Why did the armor go to the gym? It wanted to bulk up and become a plated bodybuilder!
What did the armor say to the sword? “You might be sharp, but I’m on point!”
Why did the armor go to therapy? It was feeling a little “steel” about its identity crisis!
Why did the knight switch to aluminum armor? He wanted to reduce his steel footprint!
Why did the knight’s armor always get lost? It had a plate in its head!
What do you call a knight with a hole in his armor? Sir Cumference!
Why did the knight refuse to wear a suit of armor? He didn’t want to metal in his personal affairs!
What’s a knight’s favorite type of armor? Chainmail, because it really suits them!
Why did the knight always bring a portable fan with his armor? To stay cool and avoid armor-pit stains!
Why did the armor want to become a musician? It wanted to play the metal genre!
Why did the knight’s armor always win in poker? It had the best suit in the game!
What do you call armor that needs glasses? Near-sighted mail!
What did the knight say when his armor failed to protect him? “This is a knight-mare!”
What do you call a knight in shining armor that’s always ready to fight? Sir-iously armored!
Why did the knight take up knitting? He wanted chain mail with a softer touch!
Why did the knight take his armor to the dry cleaner? It had too many iron wrinkles!
Why did the knight’s armor turn red? It was blushing from all the compliments it received!
How do knights like to communicate? Medieval networking!
Why did the armor throw a party? It wanted to let its hair down and show off its metal moves!
Why do knights always carry a shield? So they can defend themselves from unsolicited knightmares!
What did the armor say to the sword? “You’re so sharp, it’s armorazing!”
Why did the armor go to the comedy club? It wanted to prove it had a “knight” for humor!
What do you call a knight that likes to cook? Sir Loin the Grille-master!
What do you call a suit of armor made out of cheese? Gorgonzola plate mail!
What did the knight say to his armor when it broke? “Don’t worry, we’ll “steel” get through this together!”
What’s the difference between a knight and a piece of armor? One is always ready for battle, and the other is always ready for metal!
Why did the armor go to the art gallery? It wanted to find some shielded inspiration!
What did the knight say to his armor when it started squeaking? “Oil be back!”
Why did the armor start a fitness regime? It wanted to be fit as a fiddle in its metal suit!
Why did the knight bring a pen and paper to battle? He wanted to draw his swords before he used them!
What did the knight say to his armor after a battle? Thanks for sticking with me, you’ve got my back (and front)!
Why did the knight bring a piece of bread to battle? To feed his armor-plate!
Why did the knight put his armor in the refrigerator? He wanted to cool down his metal protection!
Why did the knight start a band? Because he had a knight of rock ‘n’ roll!
Why did the armor go on vacation? It needed some plate time away from all the battles!
Why did the armor go to the comedy club? It wanted to metal in some laughter!
What did the knight say when his armor got rusty? “I guess I need to iron out some issues!”
Why was the suit of armor the life of the party? It always knew how to make everyone knight-eresting!
Why did the knight refuse to wear armor in the summer? It was too plateful!
Why did the knight refuse to wear his armor? It was plate-fully heavy!
Why did the armor go to the party alone? It didn’t want to get too attached and become emotionally un-armored!
Why did the knight always carry a piece of bread with him? In case he got hungry, he could have a shield and a meal at the same time!
Why did the knight invest in a new set of armor? Because he wanted to protect his assets!
Why was the knight always so calm? He had a lot of armor to shield his emotions!
What did the armor say to the sword during their argument? “You’re just a sharp-tongued troublemaker!”
Why did the knight always bring a feather with him into battle? To tickle his opponents’ armor and catch them off guard!
Why did the knight wear full armor to the wedding? He wanted to protect his suit of armor from getting emotional!
What did the blacksmith say to the knight who couldn’t decide on armor? “Suit yourself!”
Why did the knight’s armor get detention? It was caught helmutting out of class!

Armor Joke Generator

Struggling to forge the perfect armor joke can often leave you feeling as though you’re in the midst of a comedy battlefield.

(Can you feel the tension?)

Enter our FREE Armor Joke Generator to your rescue.

This generator is crafted to meld clever wordplay, sharp wit, and playful banter, producing jokes that are guaranteed to penetrate even the toughest of laughter defenses.

Don’t let your humor become as dull and rusty as unattended armor.

Use our joke generator to create jokes that are as polished and captivating as your favorite suit of armor.

FAQs About Armor Jokes

Why are armor jokes popular?

Armor jokes are popular because they blend historical context with a unique comedic twist.

They are a fun way to engage with medieval times, knights and chivalry, while incorporating wordplay and puns about this protective attire.

Can armor jokes be useful in social situations?

Yes, armor jokes can be a great ice-breaker, especially in gatherings that involve fans of history, medieval culture, or fantasy genres.

They provide a light-hearted way to spark conversations about these topics.

How can I create my own armor jokes?

Learn about different aspects of armor, such as its parts (helmet, breastplate, gauntlets, etc.), its purpose, and the eras it was used in.
Use vocabulary related to armor (e.g., chainmail, shield, knight). Look for homophones, or interesting phrases involving these words.
Imagine funny scenarios involving armor. Maybe a knight trying to eat soup while fully armored? Tailor your humor to match this vibe.
Look for well-known sayings or phrases you can twist to include armor elements.
Don’t shy away from puns and wordplay. Armor jokes are a perfect field for some sword-sharp wit!

Are there any tips for remembering armor jokes?

You can associate armor jokes with specific situations or visuals, such as watching a medieval movie, visiting a history museum, or seeing an armored knight in a videogame.

Linking jokes to these contexts can aid recall.

How can I improve my armor jokes?

The best armor jokes strike a balance between historical context and unexpected humor.

Try to connect with your audience on a shared understanding, surprise them with your punchline, and don’t hesitate to play around with language.

Remember, practice is key.

The more you tell your jokes, the better they’ll become.

How does the Armor Joke Generator work?

Our Armor Joke Generator is designed to provide you with instant laughs.

Simply enter keywords related to your armor-themed joke or situation and press the Generate Jokes button.

In no time, you’ll have a list of hilarious armor jokes ready to share.

Is the Armor Joke Generator free?

Yes, our Armor Joke Generator is entirely free to use!

Create as many jokes as you wish and bring some knightly humor to your conversations.

Go ahead and infuse your social media posts with jokes that are as sturdy and entertaining as a suit of armor.

Conclusion

Armor jokes are a charming way to add a little spark to everyday banter, making life a bit more engaging with each chuckle.

From the quick and sly to the lengthy and laugh-triggering, there’s an armor joke for every scenario.

So next time you’re donning your armor, remember, there’s humor to be found in every helmet, breastplate, and gauntlet.

Keep clanging out the laughs, and let the good times clash and roll.

Because after all, a day without laughter is like a day without armor—exposed and, frankly, a bit less protected.

Happy joking, everyone!

Medieval Jokes That Are Perfect for Your Next Joust

Helmet Jokes That Are Head and Shoulders Above the Rest

Knight Jokes That Will Have You Rolling in Your Armor

Shield Jokes for Defense Against Bad Humor

Sword Jokes That Are Sure to Make a Sharp Point