804 Antibiotics Jokes That Will Cure Your Boredom

If you’re here, it means you’re ready to dive into the world of antibiotics jokes.

Not just any jokes, but the best of the best.

That’s why we’ve compiled a list of the most hilarious antibiotics jokes.

From puns that’ll make you ‘culture’ some laughs to one-liners that are truly ‘resistant’ to humor, our collection has a joke for every aspect of life.

So, let’s get into the ‘bacterial’ center of antibiotics humor, one joke at a time.

Contents show

Antibiotics Jokes

Antibiotic jokes are an irresistible dose of humor that can cure even the most severe cases of gloom.

They’re not just about the medicine itself but the whole universe of pharmaceutical quirks and medical marvels surrounding it.

From the tongue-twisting names of antibiotics to their widespread use in treating infections, antibiotics offer plentiful material for comedy.

Creating the perfect antibiotic joke involves a light-hearted take on medical jargon, the common experiences with antibiotics, and even the irony of their side effects.

So, are you ready to laugh your way to good health?

Brace yourself for a hearty laughter therapy with these antibiotic jokes:

Why was the antibiotic always late? It had to wait for bacteria to arrive!
Why did the antibiotic go broke? Because it couldn’t stop spending money on bacteria-cations!
Why don’t antibiotics ever feel lonely? Because they always have their PENicillin!
What’s an antibiotic’s favorite exercise? Z-packs!
What did one antibiotic say to the other in a race? “I bet I can finish this lap before you can even divide!”
Why did the bacteria refuse to take antibiotics? It didn’t want to “be under the influence”!
Why did the bacteria start a band? They wanted to go on tour with the antibiotics and make some resistant noise!
Why did the antibiotic fail the math test? It couldn’t solve for X because it only believed in Y!
Why did the antibiotic join a gym? It wanted to pump up its antibacterial muscles!
What did one antibiotic say to the other at the gym? “Time to pump up and fight those germs!”
Why did the antibiotic feel jealous? Because it saw the bacteria having a great time partying!
Why did the antibiotic get a promotion? It always went the extra mile to fight infection!
What did the doctor say to the antibiotic? “You’re a prescription for success!”
What do you call an antibiotic that can sing? Peni-cillin and the Micro-tones!
How do antibiotics greet each other? “Hey, fellow bacteria fighters! Long time, no C!”
What do you call a group of antibiotics singing together? A capsule choir!
What did the antibiotic say to the virus? Sorry, I can’t hear you, I’m too busy killing bacteria!
Why did the antibiotic go to school? To get a prescription for penmanship!
Why did the antibiotic never take up boxing? Because it was afraid of being knocked out by a “punch” of bacteria!
Why did the antibiotic bring a ladder to the party? To “climb” on top of any bacterial infections!
Why was the antibiotic always so tired? It had too many bacteria to kill!
Why did the antibiotic go to therapy? It needed help dealing with its attachment issues to bacteria!
How do antibiotics communicate? They use cell phones!
Why did the bacteria throw a party for the antibiotic? It wanted to “celebrate” their differences!
What did one antibiotic say to the other during a workout? “Let’s pump up our resistance!”
What did the doctor say to the antibiotic that was always grumpy? “You need to lighten up, you’re too bacterial!”
Why did the antibiotic become a baker? It loved kneading the bacteria!
What did one antibiotic say to the other at the disco? “Let’s boogie woogie and kill some germs!”
What do you call a germ that lost its antibiotic? A has-been!
What do you call a musical about antibiotics? A penicillin!
Why did the bacteria take an antibiotic? It wanted to feel better, not bitter!
What’s an antibiotic’s favorite type of music? Hip-Hop Bacteri-olgy!
What did the antibiotic say to the bacteria? “I’m not a fan of your culture!”
Why did the antibiotic go to therapy? It had a lot of “emotional baggage” from fighting so many infections!
Why did the bacteria refuse to play cards with the antibiotic? It said, “You always try to “kill” the fun!”
What did the antibiotic say to the bacteria who tried to invade? “You’re not going to infect me! I’m too strong for you!”
Why did the bacteria tell bad jokes? It wanted to infect everyone with laughter, not just itself!
Why did the antibiotic go to school? To get a “dose” of education!
Why did the antibiotic start a workout routine? It wanted to build up its strength and become a real super-bug fighter!
What did the antibiotic say to the germ? “I’ll stop you from being a real pain in the neck!”
Why did the antibiotic refuse to fight the bacteria? It didn’t want to stoop to their level!
What do you call an antibiotic that becomes a singer? A “cure-in-a-note”!
Why did the antibiotic break up with its partner? It felt like they were growing resistant to each other!
Why did the bacteria cross the road? To get to the other slide!
Why don’t antibiotics ever play hide and seek? Because they always get found!
Why did the antibiotic become a gardener? It loved weeding out all the bad bacteria from the soil!
What do you call a really strong antibiotic? A muscleillin!
Why did the antibiotic break up with its partner? It found someone better – a stronger strain of bacteria!
What did the antibiotic say to its friend? “I’m feeling a bit under the weather, but I’ll “ampicillin” there!”
Why did the antibiotic start a gardening hobby? It wanted to grow some antibiotic-resistant plants, just to keep things interesting!
Why did the bacteria always lose to antibiotics in trivia games? They could never “resist” the right answer!
Why did the antibiotic get a new job? It wanted to “culture” different skills!
What did one antibiotic say to the other in a crowded medicine cabinet? “There’s not enough space, we need to take a capsule vacation!”
What’s an antibiotic’s favorite dessert? A Z-pie!
What did the antibiotic say when it won the lottery? “I’m on a “pencilin”!”
Why did the antibiotic turn down the job offer? It didn’t want to work in a hostile environment.
What’s an antibiotic’s favorite type of music? Doxycycline and roll!
Why did the antibiotic break up with the painkiller? It just wasn’t working anymore.
What did one antibiotic say to the other in a race? “I’m going to “penicillin” the finish line!”
Why did the antibiotic go to the party alone? Because it didn’t want to get mixed up with the wrong crowd.
Why did the antibiotic break up with the painkiller? It couldn’t deal with the pain anymore.
Why did the bacteria start a band? They wanted to spread their antibiotic resistance through sound waves!
Why did the antibiotic feel lonely? It couldn’t make any new friends, only kill the old ones!
Why did the antibiotic get in trouble at work? Because it was caught stealing penicillin!
What did the antibiotic say to the fungus? “Don’t even think about multiplying in here!”
How do antibiotics like to party? They always bring the “anti-biotic” dance moves!
What do you call a group of antibiotics that perform on stage? A prescription-only band!
Why did the antibiotic visit the gym? It wanted to get “strong” enough to fight the bacteria!
What did the antibiotic say to the microbe? “Sorry, I’ve got no time for your bacteria-nks!”
What do you call a group of antibiotic superheroes? The Resistance League!
Why did the antibiotic bring a ladder? To reach the high bacteria!
What did the antibiotic say to the bacteria? “Stop being a resistant jerk!”
What did the antibiotic say to the germ? “I’m about to wipe you out, so don’t try to resist!”
Why did the antibiotic refuse to fight? It didn’t want to start a resistance movement!
What did one antibiotic say to the other in the gym? “Let’s pump some iron and destroy those bacteria!”
What did one antibiotic say to the other? “We make a great team, let’s stick together!”
Why was the antibiotic always confident? It knew how to “ampicillin” its self-esteem.
How do antibiotics communicate? They send each other text-bac-teria messages!
Why did the antibiotic refuse to fight? It was too tired of always being a bacterial superhero!
What do you call a dance for antibiotics? The Penicillin Shuffle!
Why did the antibiotic go to the party? It wanted to get “bacteriACEOUS”!
Why was the antibiotic so good at solving puzzles? Because it had excellent “antibiotic” reasoning skills!
What do you call an antibiotic that tells jokes? A “peni-cillin” comedian!
Why did the antibiotic go broke? It couldn’t resist the urge to give discounts!
What do you call a sheep on antibiotics? A “ram”-sistant to infection!
Why did the antibiotic take a vacation? It needed some time to relax and unwind!
What did the antibiotic say to the virus on Valentine’s Day? “You’re not my type, but I’ll still attack you with love!”
Why did the antibiotic feel lonely? It couldn’t make any new bacterial friends, they were all resistant to its charm!
Why was the antibiotic always so helpful? Because it was always willing to lend a “hand” to fight infections!
What did the antibiotic say to the stubborn bacteria? “I’m going to KILL you softly!”.
How did the antibiotic deal with a breakup? It just swallowed its pride and moved on to fight a different infection!
Why did the antibiotic always feel left out? It was constantly being overlooked for its more attractive cousin, Penicillin!
Why did the antibiotic go to the party? It wanted to be the life of the penicillin!
What’s an antibiotic’s favorite type of music? Reggae, because it’s all about positive vibes and killing bacteria!
Why did the antibiotic feel lonely? It was a solo act in the battle against bacteria!
What did one antibiotic say to the other? “I feel like we need to take a break, we’ve been together for so long, it’s time for a little resistance!”
Why did the antibiotic always have a positive outlook on life? It believed that every germ could be defeated, no matter how resistant they were!
What do you get if you cross a bacteria with a comedian? An antibiotic joke that will make you laugh until you’re cured!
What did one antibiotic say to the other at a party? “Let’s make a toast to fighting off infections and being the life of the party!”
Why did the antibiotic go to the bar? It wanted to kill some bacteria-cues!
Why did the antibiotic refuse to play hide-and-seek? It didn’t want to miss any bacteria!
What did the antibiotic say to the microbe? “I’m sorry, but I’m going to have to terminate you!”
Why did the antibiotic become a comedian? It always had a way of killing at parties!
What did the antibiotic say to the bacteria at the gym? “I’m here to pump you up… with medicine!”
Why did the antibiotic refuse to work on the weekend? It needed a “bacteria-tion”!
Why did the bacteria go to therapy? It had an “infectious” personality!
What do you call a group of antibiotics that perform a musical? The “Pill Harmonics”!
Why did the antibiotic get a job in construction? It wanted to be a “building” block against infections!
What did one antibiotic say to the other at the party? “I’m feeling penicill-incredibly good!”
Why did the antibiotic refuse to become a teacher? It didn’t want to be taken for granted and constantly asked, “What’s the point?”
Why did the antibiotic blush? It saw the bacteria it loved the most and couldn’t resist turning red!
Why did the antibiotic skip the party? It wanted to avoid catching a virus on the dance floor!
Why did the antibiotic get into politics? It wanted to create new legislation against bacteria and promote healthy living!
What did the antibiotic say to the virus? “You’re not infecting anyone on my watch!”
Why was the antibiotic feeling sleepy? It was working overtime to “Z-pack” those germs!
Why did the antibiotic become a chef? Because it liked to cook up a good bacteria-killing recipe!
What do you call an antibiotic that can do magic tricks? An “ill-usional” drug!
Why did the antibiotic go to school? To get better grades on its tests!
Why was the antibiotic always quiet? It didn’t want to “disturbia” the bacteria.
Why did the antibiotic go to the gym? It wanted to strengthen its fighting skills against bacteria!
What did the antibiotic say to the germ that tried to attack it? “Nice try, but I’m resistant to your charms!”
Why did the antibiotic go to school? To get an education in fighting bacteria!
What did the antibiotic say when it was feeling unsure? “I’m feeling a bit unstable, I might need a double dose of confidence!”
Why did the antibiotic get a second job? It wanted to make some extra resistance.
Why did the antibiotic go to the doctor? It was feeling a little under the weather, but it turned out to be just a placebo!
Why did the antibiotic start a rock band? Because it wanted to fight off infections with a dose of “antibiotic rock”!
Why did the antibiotic get a job at the bakery? It wanted to knead some dough, not bacteria!
Why was the antibiotic always late? It had trouble catching the right bus!
What did the antibiotic say to the bacteria? “You’re not so tough, I can see right through you!”
Why did the antibiotic file a police report? It got mugged by a gang of resistant bacteria!
Why did the bacteria break up with the antibiotic? It said, “Sorry, but you’re not my type!”
Why did the antibiotic break up with its significant other? It realized it was too clingy and needed some space!
How do antibiotics greet each other? “Sup my “ampicillin”!”

Short Antibiotics Jokes

Short antibiotics jokes are like the perfect dosage of humor—quick, effective, and side-effect free.

These jokes are perfect for text messages, social media posts, or that awkward moment in a doctor’s waiting room when you want to lighten the mood.

The beauty of short antibiotics jokes is their capacity to blend medical jargon and everyday humor, making you laugh out loud in just a few words.

And now, without any further ado, let’s culture some fun!

Here are short antibiotics jokes that deliver a healthy dose of laughter in just a few words.

Why do antibiotics make terrible comedians? They always kill the punchlines!
What did the antibiotic say to the germ? “You’re under a rest!”
Why did the antibiotic go to the party? To kill the germs!
What’s a germ’s favorite type of movie? A sick flick!
What do you call a mischievous antibiotic? A pill-fer!
What’s an antibiotic’s favorite dance move? The bacterial breakdance!
What do you call a cow on antibiotics? Milky Way Plus!
Why did the antibiotic become a chef? It loved serving up germ-killers!
What do you call a germ that can’t resist antibiotics? A bacteri-NO!
Why did the bacteria go to therapy? It needed antibiotic-depressants!
Why do bacteria hate antibiotics? They can’t handle the truth!
What do you call an antibiotic that plays hide and seek? Amoxicillin!
Why did the germ take antibiotics? It wanted to feel “better”!
How does an antibiotic greet its friends? With a high-five!
Why did the antibiotic always carry a calculator? It liked counting microorganisms!
What’s a germ’s favorite type of music? R&Bacterial!
What do you call a germ that’s always lost? A staph-infection!
Why did the antibiotic get in trouble? It had a bad “reaction”!
What’s an antibiotic’s favorite TV show? Breaking Bad-tibiotics!
Why did the antibiotic feel lonely? It was a solitary penicillin!
What do you call a fish that takes antibiotics? A penicillin!
Why did the bacteria go to the doctor? It had strep-tococcus!
Why did the antibiotic start working out? It wanted to build resistance!
What did the antibiotic say to the germ? Time to say goodbye-bye-teria!
Why did the germ fail the math test? It couldn’t multiply!
What do you call an antibiotic that’s always late? Tardy-cycline!
Why did the germ go to the hospital? To get a micro-organ-transplant!
Why did the bacteria join a gym? To get antibiotic resistance!
Why did the bacteria go to the party? To spread the antibiotics!
Why did the bacteria enroll in school? It wanted to get cultured!
What do you call a comedian bacterium? Amoxicillin-aire!
What do you call a germ that’s obsessed with cleanliness? A germaphobe!
What do you call a group of antibiotics? A powerful prescription squad!
Why did the antibiotic become a comedian? It always killed at open-mics!
What did one antibiotic say to the other? Time to kill it!
How do antibiotics send text messages? By cell division!
What do you call a germ that can sing? A moan-a-sore throat!
What do you call an antibiotic that plays music? A DJ-sinfectant!
How do antibiotics like to party? They like to kill the bacteria!
Why did the antibiotic blush? Because it saw the bacteria’s naked DNA!
Why did the antibiotic always carry a calculator? It loved multiplying bacteria!
How do antibiotics like to party? They go viral!
Why did the antibiotic go to therapy? It had antibiotic-resistant depression!
What do antibiotics take when they’re sick? Penicillin!
What do you call a bacteria that’s addicted to antibiotics? A germ-aholic!

Antibiotics Jokes One-Liners

Antibiotics one-liner jokes are the epitome of humor contained within a single phrase.

They’re the conversational equivalent of administering the right dose of antibiotics – precise, potent, and undeniably effective.

Formulating a top-notch one-liner demands a concoction of inventiveness, accuracy, and an inherent sense for the craft of puns.

The test lies in compressing both the setup and the punchline into a compact version, delivering a potent dose of laughter with just a few words.

Here’s to hoping these antibiotic one-liners will infect you with gales of laughter:

Why did the antibiotic start a restaurant? It wanted to serve bacteria their last meal.
What did the antibiotic say to the doctor? Thanks for prescribing me, I needed a dose of confidence!
Why did the bacteria get a ticket? It was caught speeding in the bloodstream without a prescription!
What do you call a group of bacteria that are resistant to antibiotics? A stubborn colony with a bad attitude!
Why did the antibiotic cross the road? To cure the chicken’s infection, of course!
I heard a rumor that antibiotics could cure a broken heart, but it turned out to be just a pharma-sea-utical joke.
Why did the antibiotic always feel lonely? Because it was constantly “disinfecting” relationships!
Why did the bacteria go to the gym? It wanted to get pumped up before facing the antibiotics!
I asked my antibiotic if it wanted to go out for a drink, but it said it preferred to stay in the capsule.
Why did the antibiotic become a comedian? Because it had everyone in stitches!
Why did the bacteria get a job at the post office? It wanted to lick all the stamps and spread antibiotic resistance!
I asked the pharmacist if I could buy antibiotics without a prescription, but he said I needed a shot in the arm first.
I’m a big fan of antibiotics, they really know how to kill a party… I mean bacteria.
I told my friend that his jokes were as effective as expired antibiotics – they had no effect and left everyone disappointed.
What did one antibiotic say to the other in the club? Let’s hit the dance floor and do the Penicillin Shuffle!
Why do antibiotics always win at poker? Because they know how to flush out the competition!
Why did the bacteria join a band? It wanted to become a “resistant drummer”!
Why did the antibiotic break up with the virus? It realized it was just a bacterial rebound!
Why did the bacteria take antibiotics? It wanted to cure its “achoo-sy” nose!
What did the antibiotic say to the virus? I’m going to wipe you out, you’re not on my prescription list!
Why do antibiotics never gossip? They believe in keeping things antibio-secret.
What did one antibiotic say to the other at the party? “Let’s make some antibiotic resistance!”
I asked my antibiotic for a joke, but it said it couldn’t give me any, it was “amoxicillin”!
Why was the antibiotic always invited to the picnic? Because it was great at “killing” it on the grill!
Why did the antibiotic win the spelling bee? Because it knew how to “cure” all the letters!
I told my friend that antibiotics are like superheroes fighting off bacteria villains, he said, “Yeah, but I prefer the supervillains, they’re more interesting.”
Why did the antibiotic go to the gym? It wanted to build some resistance and gain strength to fight bacteria.
I heard antibiotics have a great sense of humor, they always find a way to kill the bacteria-als!
What did the antibiotic say to the germ at the party? Let’s make a toast to your demise!
My friend said antibiotics are like superheroes for your immune system, but I think they’re more like sidekicks.
I asked the doctor if I could take antibiotics with alcohol, he said, “Sure, but it’s a shot in the dark!”
Why did the antibiotic break up with its partner? Because they were becoming resistant to commitment!
Why did the bacteria bring a ladder to the pharmacy? Because it wanted to reach the high shelves where the antibiotics were kept!
The only thing worse than taking antibiotics is trying to spell antibiotics without spell check.
What did the antibiotic say to the germ? You better bac-off before I give you a prescription for pain.
Why did the antibiotic feel left out? Because it was never invited to the bacterial parties!
I asked my doctor if I could take antibiotics for my bad breath. He said, “Sorry, they don’t make ‘anti-stinky’ pills.”
Why did the germ become a comedian? Because it had antibiotic-lity for humor!
What do you call a group of bacteria that can sing? Antibiochoir!
What did the antibiotic say when it won the race? “I’m the fastest resistance in town!”
I told the antibiotic a joke, but it didn’t laugh. Guess it had a strict “no bacterium” policy.
My doctor said to take antibiotics with food, so I started a restaurant called “Bacteria Buffet”
If antibiotics were a person, they would definitely be the life of the party… because they kill all the bacteria!
Why did the antibiotic start taking yoga classes? It wanted to stay flexible and fight off resistance!
My friend thinks antibiotics are like magic pills. I told him, “Well, they do disappear after a few days!”
Did you hear about the antibiotic that broke up with its girlfriend? It said she was too resistant to commitment!
I told my friend that I’m on a strict antibiotic diet. She asked if that means I can only eat moldy bread.
I went to a comedy show about antibiotics, but all the jokes went over my immune system’s head.
Why did the antibiotic get a job in construction? Because it loved tearing down bacterial walls!
Why did the antibiotic become a comedian? It wanted to spread some laughter without spreading bacteria!
I asked my doctor if I could take my antibiotics with alcohol. He said, “Sure, if you want them to join the party too!”
My friend got a prescription for antibiotics and I told her it must be a bitter pill to swallow, but she didn’t find it very punny.
I told my friends I’m allergic to antibiotics. Now every time we go out to eat, they ask if I need an EpiPen with my burger.
Why did the bacteria book a vacation to a tropical island? It wanted to escape from the antibiotic’s reach!
I told my friend I’m on antibiotics, and he said, “Well, I guess your body is going through some drug trials.”
My doctor said I need to finish the entire course of antibiotics, but I keep forgetting where I left off on Netflix.
Antibiotics are like superheroes, fighting off the evil bacteria in our bodies.
Why did the bacteria bring a ladder to the party? Because it wanted to reach the high shelf and find some antibiotics!
Why did the antibiotic break up with the germ? It wanted to be single and mingle with other bacteria!
I used to think antibiotics were a type of ancient writing, but then I learned they’re just really good at killing bacteria.
I asked my doctor if I could take a break from antibiotics. He said, “Sure, but just remember, bacteria never take a break from multiplying.” Thanks for the encouragement, doc.
Why did the bacteria join a gym? It wanted to build up resistance to antibiotics!
Why did the antibiotic get a job as a comedian? It had a natural knack for killing with laughter!
What do you call a doctor who can’t prescribe antibiotics? A lousy “medication”!
I asked my doctor if I could have a prescription for antibiotics, he said, “Sure, but it’s gonna be hard to swallow… literally.”
What do you call a germ that’s been given antibiotics? A Mellow Fellow!
I asked my doctor if I could have antibiotics for my terrible sense of humor, but he said it wasn’t a bacterial infection.
I took my antibiotics so seriously that I even named them my “anti-biotics”
I tried to convince my antibiotics to take a vacation, but they said, “Sorry, we’re not on antibiotics here!”
Why did the antibiotic become an artist? It loved creating antibiotic masterpieces!
I’m not saying my house is messy, but I found an expired antibiotic behind the couch. It’s like a hidden treasure for germs!
I saw an antibiotic at the gym. It said, “I’m here to get ripped… bacteria!”
I accidentally swallowed a whole bottle of antibiotics. Now I’m feeling a little better, but my phone is ringing non-stop with telemarketers trying to sell me health insurance.
What do you call a cheese that takes antibiotics? A Provolone Ranger!
I asked my doctor if antibiotics could help me become funnier, but he said it was a question for a comedian, not a pharmacist.
What did the antibiotic say to the bacterium? “You’re not a-gonna survive!”
My doctor told me to finish my antibiotics even if I feel better. Apparently, bacteria have trust issues too.
I found out my girlfriend is addicted to antibiotics. She said she just can’t resist the allure of the little pills. I guess you could say she’s got a prescription for love.
I told my mom that I’m taking antibiotics. She said, “Well, at least now you’ll have an excuse for why you never finish anything.” Thanks, Mom.
Why did the bacteria go on a diet? It wanted to be slim and resistant to antibiotics!
Why did the antibiotic always carry around a map? Because it didn’t want to get lost in the bloodstream!
I took antibiotics for my cold, now I have a prescription for laughter!
Why did the antibiotic have a hard time making friends? It was always killing the bacteria vibe!
I asked the pharmacist if the antibiotics were strong. He replied, “Oh, they can bench-press a whole colony of bacteria!”
I asked my doctor for a stronger antibiotic, he gave me a microscope instead.
Why did the bacteria dislike the antibiotic? It just couldn’t handle the resistance!
My mom said she has a natural remedy for infections, but I’m pretty sure chanting “Abracadabra” won’t make the bacteria disappear.
I asked my doctor if antibiotics will make me resistant to bad jokes, but she said sadly, no, it’s just for bacteria.
What did one antibiotic say to the other at the gym? “Let’s get swole-cillin!”
I tried to make my jokes antibiotic-resistant, but they still seemed to spread like a superbug.
My antibiotics and I have a love-hate relationship. I love them for curing me, but I hate them for making me nauseous.
Why did the antibiotic break up with the painkiller? It just couldn’t handle the headache!
I tried using antibiotics to solve my relationship problems, but all it did was kill the bacteria, not the drama.
Why did the antibiotic break up with its significant other? Because it was tired of all the resistance!
My doctor told me to take antibiotics three times a day, but I just can’t resist the urge to take them four times a day. I guess I’m an antibiotic rebel!
Why was the antibiotic always the life of the party? Because it killed all the germs!
I told my friend he should take antibiotics for his cold, he said, “Nah, I prefer the natural approach… sneezing my germs on everyone.”
Why did the bacteria go to the pharmacy? Because it needed a “shot” of antibiotics!
What did one antibiotic say to the other? “Let’s make sure we don’t get taken for “granulitis”!
My dad said antibiotics are like the Jedi knights of medicine, fighting off the dark side of bacteria. May the force be with you!
Why did the bacteria always lose at poker? Because the antibiotic always had an ace up its sleeve!
What did one antibiotic say to the other? Don’t worry, I’ve got your back…and your infection.
What did the antibiotic say to the bacteria? You’re not my type, I’m resistant to your charm!
Why did the antibiotic go to art school? Because it wanted to learn how to paint a pretty picture of bacteria!
Why did the bacteria go to the gym? Because it wanted to work on its bacterial biceps!
My doctor told me I needed antibiotics, but I said no, I’ll just let my immune system figure it out.
I used to think antibiotics were just for sick people, but then I realized they’re also for people who can’t keep up with the Kardashians.
Why did the antibiotic apply for a job at the pharmacy? It thought it would be a great pill to swallow!
Why did the antibiotic file a police report? It was a victim of bacterial assault!
Why did the bacteria refuse to take antibiotics? Because it didn’t want to get labeled as a ‘party pooper’!
What do you call a hipster antibiotic? A counter-culture!
I asked the antibiotic if it wanted to go on a date. It replied, “Sorry, I’m only interested in bacterial attraction!”
I told my friend I was on antibiotics, and he asked if that meant I couldn’t drink alcohol. I said, “No, it just means I can’t share my antibiotics with you.”
Why did the antibiotic have low self-esteem? Because it was constantly compared to penicillin!
My doctor prescribed me antibiotics, but I think he’s just playing doctor.
Why did the antibiotic become a fashion designer? It knew how to dress to kill bacteria!
My doctor told me I have a bacteria infection and prescribed me antibiotics. I asked if they come with a side of fries, but he didn’t seem amused.
Why did the antibiotic start a comedy club? Because it wanted to kill with laughter!
I asked my pharmacist for a strong antibiotic, and he handed me a microscope. Apparently, my bacteria need an intervention.
My friend asked if I could share my antibiotics with him, and I said, “Sure, but only if you’re willing to experience all the possible side effects.”
I accidentally swallowed a whole bottle of antibiotics. I guess you could say I’m overdosing on good health.
Why did the antibiotic become a comedian? It wanted to work on its “antibiotickles”!
What did one antibiotic say to the other after a successful battle? “That’s how we roll, resistance is futile!”
I asked my doctor for a prescription for antibiotics, and he gave me a placebo. Talk about sugar-coating it!
Why did the antibiotic never get invited to parties? Because it killed all the bacteria that spread the invitations!
I told my antibiotics that they should win an award for their hard work. They replied, “Thanks, but we prefer to remain incognito.”
Why did the antibiotic go to the party alone? Because it didn’t want to catch any bugs!
I tried to make a joke about antibiotics, but it just didn’t have enough culture.
Why did the bacteria start a band? It wanted to spread its antibiotic resistance through infectious music!
Did you hear about the germ that got a job at the pharmacy? It was filling in for the antibiotics!
Why was the antibiotic worried about its weight? It didn’t want to be a heavy dose!
My doctor said I need to take antibiotics for my infection, I said, “Can’t I just listen to some Bob Marley and hope it goes away?”
Why did the antibiotic get detention? It refused to take any resistance from the bacteria!
Why did the antibiotic always bring a calculator? It liked to multiply.
I used to think antibiotics were overrated until I tried telling a joke without them – it bombed worse than a bacterial infection.
Why did the antibiotic break up with its partner? Because they had too many resistance issues and couldn’t compromise!
I accidentally took my antibiotics with a shot of tequila, now I’m fighting off the bacteria with a Mexican standoff.
I tried using antibiotics to cure my fear of needles. Unfortunately, it didn’t work. I guess you could say I’m immune to their magical powers.
Why did the antibiotic get a promotion? It had outstanding antibacterial skills.
My antibiotics broke up with me. They said they needed some space to kill bacteria elsewhere.
I went to the doctor and told him I needed antibiotics for my cold. He said, “Sorry, I can’t cure your common sense.” Ouch!
My doctor prescribed me a course of antibiotics, but I think it’s just a placebo effect.
I asked the pharmacist if they had any antibiotic jokes. He said, “Sorry, they’re all hard to swallow!”
I asked my pharmacist for a prescription for antibiotics, but he said, “Sorry, we’re all out of those. We only have placebo pills shaped like tiny bacteria.”
Why did the antibiotic fail the math test? It couldn’t solve the “microbial equations”!
What did the antibiotic say to the bacteria that was acting tough? “You’re no match for my penicillin punch!”
I told my friend he should take antibiotics for his cold, but he said he prefers to let his immune system be a real trooper.
Did you hear about the antibiotic that went to the party? It was a real penicillin of the crowd!
My doctor said the best way to take antibiotics is with a glass of water, but I prefer mine with a side of pizza.
Why did the antibiotic go to the beach? It wanted to catch some bacteria in the sun.
Did you hear about the antibiotic that got promoted? It was outstanding in its field!
I told my girlfriend she should stop taking antibiotics. She said, “But they’re the only pills that love me back!”
Why did the bacteria start a band? Because they wanted to perform antibiotic resistance songs!
My doctor told me to take my antibiotics with food, so I started telling jokes while eating – now I have the best-dressed stomach in town.
What did the antibiotic say to the germ? “You better be ready for some tough love!”
What did the antibiotic say to the virus? I’m sorry, but I don’t have time for your infectious personality.
My friend told me I should take antibiotics for my cold, but I think I’ll just wait it out and let nature take its course.
My doctor told me I should take my antibiotics with a spoonful of sugar, but I’m pretty sure she was just trying to help the medicine go down.
Why did the bacteria go to the doctor? It wanted antibiotics to feel better, of course!
I tried to tell a joke about antibiotics, but it didn’t go viral.
My friend said he’s allergic to antibiotics, but I think he’s just trying to avoid paying for his own drinks at the bar.
Antibiotics: the only thing standing between us and a world ruled by rebellious bacteria.
Did you hear about the antibiotic that became a comedian? It had everyone in stitches!
I once told a joke about antibiotics, but it had no punchline – it was just a placebo joke.
I asked my doctor for a prescription for laughter, but he gave me antibiotics instead. I guess he thought I needed some anti-funnytics.
I accidentally swallowed a whole bottle of antibiotics, and now I’m immune to bacterial punchlines.
What did the antibiotic say to the bacteria? You better not resist, I have my penicillin!
Why did the antibiotic refuse to fight against the bacteria? It wanted to be a peacillin!
I tried to make my own antibiotics at home, but it was a real “culture” shock!
I told my antibiotics a joke, but they didn’t laugh. I guess they have no sense of humor, just an immune response.
Why did the antibiotic go to the party? Because it was feeling contagious!
What did the antibiotic say to the bacteria? “It’s time for you to get a dose of reality!”
If antibiotics were a superhero, their catchphrase would be, “Have no fear, I’m here to kill all the bacteria!”
My cat stole my antibiotics and now she thinks she’s the purr-fection of health.
Why did the bacteria start a band? Because it had a lot of antibiotic resistance.

Antibiotics Dad Jokes

Antibiotics dad jokes are the perfect dose of humor and science that can leave anyone chuckling and rolling their eyes simultaneously.

They’re the sort of jokes that are so cheesy, they’re hilarious.

These jokes are ideal for lightening up discussions in biology class, family dinners, or simply to brighten someone’s day with a hearty laugh.

Prepare yourselves for the chuckles and facepalms.

Here are some antibiotics dad jokes that are sure to tickle your funny bone:

Why did the antibiotic always bring a pencil to class? It liked to draw blood!
Why did the antibiotic refuse to play cards? Because it didn’t want to be part of a “cipro” scam!
Why did the antibiotic invite the virus to a party? To help it get over its cold!
Why do antibiotics never gossip? Because they know how to keep things under their antibiotic caps!
Why did the antibiotic refuse to dance? Because it didn’t want to “metronidazole” its rhythm!
Why did the antibiotic start a dance class? It wanted to show bacteria how to do the antibiotic shuffle!
Why did the antibiotic go to therapy? Because it wanted to work on its resistance issues!
Why did the antibiotic go to the gym? To work on its antibiotic strength.
Why was the antibiotic a great dancer? Because it had some sick moves against the bacteria!
Why did the antibiotic start singing in the shower? Because it wanted to perform a germ-destroying concert!
Why did the antibiotic go on vacation? It needed a break from all the bacteria-battling!
Why did the antibiotic feel so confident? Because it knew it could always “ampicillin” itself!
Why did the antibiotic go to the art gallery? It wanted to appreciate the beautiful microorganisms!
Why was the antibiotic afraid of heights? Because it was afraid of getting high doses!
Why did the antibiotic get in trouble at school? Because it was caught skipping recess to kill germs in the bathroom!
Why don’t antibiotics ever get lost? Because they always follow the prescription directions!
Why are antibiotics great at parties? They always bring their own resistance to the dance floor.
What did the antibiotic say to the microorganism? “I’m going to wipe you out, one cell at a time!”
Why do antibiotics never miss their dentist appointments? Because they always remember to floss their teeth!
Why did the antibiotic start a gardening hobby? Because it loved to cultivate bacteria!
Why did the antibiotic have a great sense of humor? Because it knew laughter was the best medicine, even though it was technically a medicine itself!
Why did the antibiotic become an artist? It wanted to paint a better future without superbugs!
Why did the antibiotic refuse to join a band? It didn’t want to be a part of any microbial resistance group.
What do you call an antibiotic that can play the guitar? Amp-i-cillin.
Why did the antibiotic start a band? Because it had a good rhythm and could always kill it on stage!
Why did the antibiotic bring a ladder to the party? To help it climb up the bacterial chain!
Why did the antibiotic get a job at the bakery? Because it was great at “kneading” the dough!
Why did the antibiotic join a soccer team? Because it loved tackling the opposing team’s infections!
Why did the antibiotic start a band? It wanted to create a harmony between good and bad bacteria!
Why don’t antibiotics ever go on vacation? Because they can’t resist staying on duty!
Why did the bacteria go to the doctor? It wanted a prescription for an antibiotic vacation!
Why did the antibiotic start a fitness routine? Because it wanted to build some “antibod-weights”!
Why did the antibiotic skip its workout? Because it needed a rest day to fight off some germs!
Why did the antibiotic take up gardening? It wanted to grow its own defense against bacteria!
What do you get when you mix a pharmacist with a comedian? Antibiotic puns that always cure the laughter!
Why did the antibiotic fail the test? It couldn’t keep up with all the bacteria’s cheating notes!
What did the antibiotic say to the bacteria? “I’m here to put an end to your infectious shenanigans!”
Why did the antibiotic become a superhero? It wanted to fight off the evil bacteria with its superpowers!
How do antibiotics like their coffee? Decaffeinated, because they don’t need any extra resistance.
Why did the antibiotic break up with its girlfriend? Because she was too resistant to commitment!
How does an antibiotic apologize? It says, “I’m sorry for being so resistant, let’s be penicillin-pals again!”
Why did the antibiotic become a detective? Because it loved solving the case of the bacterial outbreak!
Why are antibiotics so good at solving puzzles? They have a knack for antibiotic resistance.
What’s an antibiotic’s favorite type of music? Prescription for Rock ‘n’ Roll!
What do you call an antibiotic that tells jokes? A pill that’s good at antibiotic humor!
Why did the antibiotic become a chef? It wanted to serve up a delicious dish of antibacterial goodness!
Why did the antibiotic start working out? To build up its immune system, of course!
Why did the antibiotic go to the party? Because it heard there would be a lot of germs to kill on the dance floor!
Why did the antibiotic become a chef? Because it loved cooking up a storm and serving bacteria their worst nightmare!
Why did the antibiotic always win the race? It had a fast-acting formula!
Why did the antibiotic start a garden? Because it wanted to grow “resistant” plants!
Why did the antibiotic get a promotion? It demonstrated exceptional resistance skills in the workplace.
Why did the antibiotic get a job at the pharmacy? It wanted to be a pill-osopher!
Why did the antibiotic bring a map to the party? In case it needed directions to the antibiotic resistance dance floor!
Why do antibiotics make terrible comedians? Because their jokes often fall flat, just like resistant bacteria!
Why did the antibiotic go to the gym? Because it wanted to get ripped and fight off those resistant bacteria!
How do antibiotics travel? They take resistance cruises to different parts of the body.
Why was the antibiotic not invited to the party? Because it had a penicillin to ruin everything!
Why did the antibiotic go to school? Because it wanted to improve its immune “school set”!
What do you call a germ that is great at math? An antibiotic-lin!
Why did the antibiotic win the lottery? Because it had a “superbug” ticket!
What did the antibiotic say when it won the lottery? “I’m going to buy a new microscope and see the world!”
Why did the antibiotic join a band? Because it had good rhythm and knew how to kill the beats!
What did the antibiotic say when it found a penicillin-resistant bacterium? “You can’t “staph” me!
How do antibiotics like to communicate? They send each other text-resistant bacteria!
Why did the antibiotic take up gardening? It wanted to cultivate good bacteria relationships!
Why did the antibiotic always win at poker? Because it had a “flush” of antibacterial cards!
Why did the antibiotic break up with the germ? Because it was feeling anti-biotic.
Why did the antibiotic break up with its significant other? Because it couldn’t handle the commitment to one strain of bacteria!
Why did the antibiotic break up with the painkiller? Because it didn’t want any drama in its life, just bacteria!
What did the antibiotic say to the virus? “I’m going to make you feel bacterial-ly small!”
Why did the antibiotic start a band? It wanted to spread some good vibes and kill off the bad ones!
Why did the antibiotic refuse to share its food? Because it didn’t want to “spread” anything!
What did the antibiotic say to its friend? “I’m just trying to be a positive influence on bacteria!”
What’s an antibiotic’s favorite song? “Killing Me Softly” by the Fugees!
Why do antibiotics make great comedians? Because they always deliver the punchline against infection!
Why did the antibiotic feel confident? Because it knew how to fight off infection with a dose of humor!
What did one antibiotic say to the other? “I’ve got you covered!”
Why did the antibiotic get a promotion? Because it was always going above and beyond to kill those pesky germs!
What do you call a germ that loves to dance? Penicillin the groove!
Why was the antibiotic always a good listener? Because it had excellent bacteria hearing!
Why did the antibiotic take up boxing? It wanted to knock out those pesky bacteria!
What did the antibiotic say when it won the Nobel Prize? “I’ve finally found the cure for applause!”
Why did the antibiotic start a bakery? Because it wanted to knead out all the bad dough!
What did one antibiotic say to the other at the gym? Let’s pump up our bacterial-fighting muscles!
Why did the antibiotic break up with its girlfriend? Because she couldn’t resist the antibiotic resistance!
Why did the antibiotic get a promotion? Because it always “bacteria-lyzed” any obstacle in its path!
How do antibiotics like to solve problems? By taking a bacteria-breaker and showing those germs who’s boss!
What do you call a germ who is always late? Tardy-cillin!
Why did the antibiotic become a detective? Because it loved solving bacterial mysteries and bringing them to justice!
Why did the antibiotic go to school? Because it wanted to be a little capsule-tain!
Why did the antibiotic feel nervous? It was under a lot of antibiotic-pressure!
What do antibiotics use to communicate? “Cell” phones!
Why did the antibiotic always win at poker? Because it had the best hand against bacteria!
What do you call an antibiotic with a good sense of humor? A hilarious resistance fighter.
Why did the antibiotic refuse to play cards? It didn’t want to deal with any resistant spades!
What did one antibiotic say to the other at the party? “Let’s make sure we kill it on the dance floor!”
Why did the antibiotic join a band? Because it had a talent for “sick” guitar solos!
Why did the antibiotic become a comedian? Because it had a knack for killing at every punchline!
Why do antibiotics make great friends? Because they’re always there to kill bacteria and have your back!
What do you call an antibiotic that’s always dancing? A disco-cillin!
Why did the antibiotic go on vacation? Because it needed a little “rest and resistance”!
Why did the antibiotic refuse to join social media? Because it didn’t want to be a gram-negative influencer!
Why did the antibiotic have so many friends? Because it always knew how to “cult”-ivate relationships!
Why did the antibiotic get a job as a detective? Because it wanted to solve the case of the elusive superbug!
What did the antibiotic say to the bacteria? “I’m not here to make friends, I’m here to kill you!”
Why did the antibiotic join the gym? To get stronger and fight off those pesky bacteria!
How do antibiotics stay fit? They engage in resistance training every day.
Why did the antibiotic go to the party? Because it wanted to kill all the bacteria on the dance floor!
Why did the bacteria start running away from the antibiotic? Because it had a knack for bacterial hunting!
Why did the bacteria go to the doctor? It wanted a dose of antibiotic stand-up comedy!
What did the antibiotic say to the germ? “I’m here to ruin your day!”
Why did the antibiotic become a chef? Because it wanted to whip up a recipe to eradicate harmful germs!
What did the antibiotic say to the other antibiotics at the party? “Let’s all “rocephin” this place up!
Why did the antibiotic refuse to share its dessert? Because it wanted to be the “sole survivor” of the sweetness!
What do antibiotics and construction workers have in common? They both know how to demolish the bad stuff!
Why did the antibiotic become a comedian? Because it had a great sense of “bacterial” humor!
Why did the antibiotic become a detective? It had a natural ability to solve bacterial cases!
What did the antibiotic say to the bacteria? Your days are numbered!
Why did the antibiotic go to the movies alone? Because it didn’t want to share its popcorn with any infectious bacteria!
Why did the antibiotic refuse to play cards? Because it was afraid of getting dealt a bad hand!
What did the germ say to the antibiotic? “You can’t touch this!” (Cue MC Hammer music).
Why did the antibiotic love to dance? Because it had killer moves against bacteria!
Why did the antibiotic bring a book to the party? Because it wanted to “cover” all the bacteria in the room!
Why did the bacteria go to the party? Because it wanted to spread some infectious laughter!
Why did the antibiotic start a band? Because it wanted to play a killer tune against harmful bacteria!
Why did the antibiotic go on a vacation? It needed some time to relax and recharge its germ-fighting abilities!
Why did the bacteria run away from the antibiotic? It was “terrified” of its effects!
Why did the antibiotic bring a map to the party? Because it wanted to “navigate” through the bacteria!
Why did the antibiotic become a teacher? Because it wanted to educate the bacteria on proper manners!
Why was the antibiotic feeling down? It had a lot of resistance from the bacteria!
How does an antibiotic apologize? It says, “I’m sorry, I made a resistance-take mistake!”
What did the antibiotic say to the fungus? “You’re a fun-guy, but I’m here to take you down!”
What do you call an antibiotic that sings? A germ-killer with a melodious voice!
Why did the antibiotic become a detective? Because it was an expert at solving “microbial” mysteries!
What did the antibiotic say to the bacteria? “I’m here to put you on a germ diet!”
Why did the antibiotic become a comedian? It loved delivering punchlines to bacteria!
Why did the antibiotic refuse to lend money? Because it didn’t believe in giving loans to microorganisms!
Why did the antibiotic go to art class? Because it wanted to learn how to draw some good bacteria!

Antibiotics Jokes for Kids

Antibiotics jokes for kids are like the superheroes of the joke world—always ready to combat the blue moods and inject a dose of laughter.

These jokes help kids to engage with science in a fun and light-hearted way, fostering their curiosity and interest in the medical field.

Additionally, antibiotics jokes for kids can also make health and hygiene topics more approachable, turning a potentially boring subject into a source of amusement.

Ready for some laughter therapy?

Here are the jokes that’ll have them giggling in their lab coats:

What do you call a superhero antibiotic? Penicillin the Protector!
Why was the antibiotic running late for the party? It was busy killing germs!
What do you call a germ that is afraid of antibiotics? A chicken bacterium!
What did the germ say to the antibiotic? “You can’t “flu” around me!”
Why did the antibiotic keep a journal? To document its “fighting bacteria” adventures!
What do you get when you mix an antibiotic with a potato? French fries with peni-cillin!
Why did the antibiotic become a superhero? Because it had the power to fight against germs!
Why did the antibiotic go to the circus? To see the amoebas perform their bacteria-balancing act!
What do you call a germ that has been defeated by antibiotics? A has-bean!
What did the doctor say to the germ? “I’m going to give you a shot and you’ll be feeling better in no time!”
What did the antibiotic say to the sick kid? Don’t worry, I’ve got your back! Or rather, your bacteria!
Why did the germ call the antibiotic? It needed someone to help it feel better!
What did the antibiotic say to the germ? Time to meet your worst nightmare, Mr. Bacteria!
Why did the bacteria break up with the antibiotic? It said they weren’t compatible anymore!
How do antibiotics get their dance moves? They take antibiotics lessons from the bacteria’s worst enemy, Mr. Rhythm!
What did the antibiotic say to the virus? “You’re not gonna viral me down!”.
Why did the antibiotic join a band? Because it loved killing germs with killer guitar solos!
How did the antibiotic become a rockstar? It had the power to kill bad bacteria with killer tunes!
Why did the antibiotic go to the gym? To build up its resistance against bacteria!
Why did the antibiotic go to the gym? To pump iron and build immunity!
Why did the bacteria need glasses? Because it couldn’t “see” the end of the petri dish!
What did the antibiotic say to the fungus? You’re not my ‘bacteria’ buddy!
Why did the bacteria refuse to take the antibiotic? Because it had a “no prescription” policy!
How did the antibiotic win the race? It took the fast lane and left all the bacteria behind!
Why did the antibiotic cross the road? To help the chicken fight off bacteria!
What do you call an antibiotic that’s always on time? Punc-tualcin!
What do you call a germ that can play the piano? Antibiotic Chopin!
Why did the antibiotic get a promotion? Because it had the ability to work well under pressure!
Why did the antibiotic cross the road? To help fight off infection on the other side!
Why did the doctor give the antibiotic a gold medal? Because it fought off the bacteria and won the race to recovery!
What did the bacteria say to the antibiotic? “You can’t beat me, I’m resistant!”
Why did the antibiotic bring a map to the hospital? Because it wanted to find the “infection junction”!
Why did the antibiotic go to the gym? To pump up its germ-fighting muscles!
What did the antibiotic say to the germ? “You better watch out, because I’m the cure to your trouble!”
Why do antibiotics always get invited to parties? Because they know how to “kill” it on the dance floor!
Why did the bacteria go to the doctor? It needed to get some antibiotic advice!
Why did the antibiotic become an actor? It wanted to be in a germ-tastic movie!
Why did the antibiotic bring a ladder? It wanted to reach the top and defeat all the bacteria!
What do you get if you cross a bacteria with a cat? Antibiotic-meow!
What do you get when you cross a bacteria with a musical instrument? A germ-ophone!
What do you call a germ that’s good at math? An antibiotic-ician!
Why did the antibiotic bring a parachute? Just in case it needed to drop into a battle with bacteria!
What did the antibiotic say to the mold? “You’re not a “fun-guy” anymore!”
What’s a bacteria’s favorite song? “I Will Survive” by Gloria “Steinem” (streptomycin)!
How do antibiotics greet each other? With a high “five” to kill the germs!
Why did the antibiotic get a promotion? Because it always showed up to work, no matter the bacteria emergency!
Why did the antibiotic blush? Because it saw the bacteria “flirting” with it!
What do you call a germ that loves antibiotics? A prescription enthusiast!
What do antibiotics and superheroes have in common? They both fight off “villainous” bacteria!
Why was the antibiotic always tired? Because it worked around the clock to fight bacteria!
Why did the antibiotic blush? It saw the bacteria and couldn’t help but turn red!
What do you call a group of bacteria that are friends with an antibiotic? “Antibio-ticks”!
What do you get when you cross a bacteria with an antibiotic? Antibiotic-resistant bacteria!
What did the antibiotic say to the bacteria? “You better be prepared, I’m going to fight infection!”
How do antibiotics greet each other? With a high five and a “Goodbye, bacteria!”
Why did the bacteria always lose against the antibiotic in a race? Because the antibiotic had a “fast-acting” formula!
Why did the antibiotic refuse to fight the virus? It wanted to maintain its peaceful resistance!
How do antibiotics like to communicate? They send text-micillin!
Why did the antibiotic become an astronaut? It wanted to explore the galaxy for new germs!
Why did the antibiotic become a superhero? Because it could fight off the bacteria villains!
What do you call a germ that likes to take antibiotics? A prescription addict!
What did one antibiotic say to the other? “We make a great team, we’re always fighting off those mean bacteria!”
Why did the antibiotic bring a ladder to the party? Because it heard the bacteria was high up on the shelf!
What do you call a germ that is a great swimmer? An antibiotic “resistant”!
What do you call a superhero who fights against bacteria? Captain Antibiotic!
Why did the bacteria refuse to take antibiotics? Because they didn’t want to get a bad “reputation”!
Why did the antibiotic refuse to play cards with the bacteria? It knew they were cheatersilin!
What did one antibiotic say to the other at the party? “Let’s stay out of trouble and kill those germs!”
Why did the antibiotic go to the party? It wanted to have a bacteria-rrific time!
Why did the antibiotic bring a ladder to the library? Because it wanted to reach the highest shelf and eliminate all bacteria hiding there!
Why did the antibiotic take up painting? It wanted to create masterpieces that killed bacteria!
What do you call a sneezy antibiotic? Achoomycin!
How did the antibiotic win the race? It took a short-cut through the bloodstream!
What did the antibiotic say to the bacteria? “It’s time for you to hit the road, Jack!”
Why did the bacteria join a gym? It wanted to get in shape for battle against antibiotics!
Why did the antibiotic always carry a map? It wanted to find its way to any bacteria infection quickly!
What do you get if you cross a germ with a comedian? A “laugh”-teria!
Why do antibiotics always win in races? Because they have the “fastest-acting” formula!
What did the antibiotic say to the germ? “You better bac-off! I’m here to fight you!”
What do you get if you mix an antibiotic with a pirate? Captain Staphylococcus!
Why did the antibiotic go to school? It wanted to learn how to make all the germs “disappear”!
What do you get when you cross an antibiotic with a computer? A cure that goes viral!
What do you call a group of antibiotics having a party? A bacterial bash!
Why did the antibiotic go to the beach? To fight off the sunburn bacteria!
What did the antibiotic say to the virus? “I’m going to take you down, one germ at a time!”
Why did the antibiotic go to the circus? It wanted to see the amazing bacterial balancing act!
What’s a bacteria’s favorite type of music? R&B (Resistance and Bacterium)!
What did one antibiotic say to the other? “I’m feeling bacterialicious today!”
Why did the germ take an antibiotic with it on vacation? It wanted to make sure it had a “sick” time!
Why did the antibiotic go on a diet? It wanted to shed some “gram-negative” bacteria!
Why did the antibiotic bring a ladder to the party? To reach the high levels of bacteria-fighting fun!
What’s an antibiotic’s favorite movie genre? Suspense-thriller-cin!
Why did the antibiotic take a day off? It needed to rest and recharge its superpowers!
Why did the antibiotic start a band? It wanted to create a “resistance” movement in the music industry!
What did the antibiotic say to the bacteria? “I’m here to stop you from spreading trouble!”
What do you get when you mix an antibiotic with a snowman? Frostbite-killin’!
Why did the antibiotic become a detective? Because it wanted to solve the case of the disappearing bacteria!
Why did the bacteria throw a party? It heard the antibiotic was coming to crash it!
What did one antibiotic say to the other in math class? “I think I have a solution to this bacterial problem!”
Why did the bacteria break up with the antibiotic? They just couldn’t work things out – it was a resistance-tible relationship!
Why did the antibiotic go to school? To get good grades in germs!
Why did the antibiotic become a chef? Because it was good at killing bacteria in the kitchen!
Why did the antibiotic feel lonely? It couldn’t find any micro-buddies to hang out with!
Why did the antibiotic go to school? To get some “bac-teria” knowledge!
Why did the antibiotic break up with its girlfriend? It couldn’t handle the antibiotic-resistant bacteria!
How do antibiotics send messages? They use germ-ophones!
Why did the antibiotic blush? Because it saw the bacteria it was supposed to fight and got embarrassed!
What did the antibiotic say to the sick person? “You better “bac-terial-lieve” I’m here to help!”
Why did the germ go to the pharmacy? To pick up some “anti-fun” medication!
Why did the germ bring a ladder to the party? It wanted to be on the same level as antibiotics!
What did the antibiotic say to the bacteria? You’re under a-rest!
How do antibiotics send messages to each other? Through cell phones!
What did one antibiotic say to the other at the party? Let’s have a bacteria-blasting good time!
Why did the antibiotic become a comedian? It wanted to make germs laugh until they surrender!
What do you call a group of bacteria that love to dance? An antibiotic-resistant dance party!
What do you call a germ that makes you laugh? A “fun-gus”!
How does an antibiotic send messages? It uses Bacteria-mail!
What’s a germ’s favorite dance move? The “Bacteria Boogie”!
Why did the antibiotic visit the dentist? To fight off tooth decay-causing bacteria!
Why did the antibiotic go to school? To get smarter and fight off those bacteria!
What did the germ say to the antibiotic when it was defeated? “You’re un-bacteria-ble!”
Why did the bacteria go to the doctor? Because it was feeling a little under the weather!
What do you call a germ that can’t keep a secret? A “leak-y” bacteria!
Why did the bacteria bring a ladder to the party? Because it heard the antibiotics were on a higher level!
Why did the antibiotic go to the party? Because it heard there would be lots of “sick” dance moves!
Why did the antibiotic feel so powerful? Because it had “super” powers against bacteria!
What did the antibiotic say to the germ? “You better be ready to meet your doom, because I’m here to wipe you out!”
Why did the antibiotic blush? Because it saw the germicidal soap!
What do you get when you mix an antibiotic and a pirate? “Penicillin-y the pirate”!
What’s a germ’s favorite type of antibiotic? A “super” one!
What do you call a sneaky antibiotic? A stealthy-cillin!
Why did the bacteria cross the road? To avoid the antibiotic!
Why did the antibiotic become a doctor? It wanted to prescribe some laughter!
Why did the bacteria start a band with the antibiotics? They wanted to create some “good vibes” to fight off infection!
Why did the antibiotic go on a diet? Because it wanted to be a lean, mean fighting machine!

Antibiotics Jokes for Adults

Who said that humor can’t be infectious?

Antibiotics jokes for adults are the perfect blend of wit, humor, and just a pinch of scientific knowledge.

Just like the best antibiotics target the harmful bacteria, these jokes target your funny bone, giving you a dose of laughter, and at times, a spark of intellectual stimulus.

Ideal for cocktail parties, casual get-togethers, or even as a fun ice-breaker at the start of a serious discussion, these jokes are here to inject some fun into your life.

So, get ready to laugh out loud with these antibiotics jokes designed exclusively for adults:

Why did the antibiotic always feel lonely? It was constantly surrounded by antimicrobial resistance!
What do antibiotics and rock bands have in common? They both fight off harmful agents and leave you feeling energized!
Why did the antibiotic start a band? It wanted to be known as the ultimate “germ-fighting rockstar”!
Why did the antibiotic get a speeding ticket? It was going too fast for the bacteria to keep up!
What did the antibiotic say to the virus? “You’re not my type, I’m only into bacterial relationships!”
Why did the antibiotic feel like a superhero? Because it was always saving the day by fighting off infections!
Why did the antibiotic break up with the bacteria? It said, “I can’t fight your infections anymore, it’s over!”
Why did the antibiotic go to therapy? It had commitment issues and couldn’t fully eradicate bacteria!
Why did the antibiotic join a gym? It wanted to stay strong and be prepared for any bacteria that came its way!
Why did the antibiotic break up with its girlfriend? She was always spreading rumors!
Why did the antibiotic become a motivational speaker? It wanted to inspire bacteria to change their harmful ways!
Why did the antibiotic cross the road? To reach the bacterial colony on the other side!
Why did the antibiotic get a promotion? It was outstanding at resolving office infections and workplace drama!
How did the antibiotic get its job? It had “killer” interview skills!
What do you call a group of bacteria that loves to sing? The Antibiotic Choir!
Why did the antibiotic become a detective? It had a knack for solving “whodunit” bacterial infections!
Why did the antibiotic join a rock band? It wanted to be known for its killer beats and infection-fighting lyrics!
What do you call a group of antibiotics performing a synchronized dance routine? The Bacteria Busters!
Why did the antibiotic refuse to fight? It didn’t want to be taken for a shot!
Why did the antibiotic go on a diet? It wanted to keep its resistance strong against harmful bacteria!
How does an antibiotic apologize? It says, “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to make you resistant!”
Why did the antibiotic go broke? It couldn’t save enough for the pill-grimage!
What did the antibiotic say to the bacteria? “I’m here to ruin your day, one cell at a time!”
Why did the doctor prescribe antibiotics to the math teacher? She needed help with her multiplying bacteria!
Why did the antibiotic start a band? It wanted to spread its killer beats and fight infections with music!
Why did the antibiotic get a standing ovation? It killed the germs and saved the day!
Why did the bacteria go to therapy? It had a bad case of antibioticophobia!
Why did the doctor become an antibiotic? He wanted to put a stop to bacteria’s bad behavior!
What do you call a group of antibiotics that perform a synchronized dance routine? A pillary dance team!
Why did the antibiotic get a promotion? It was outstanding at killing bacteria and had excellent teamwork skills!
What do you call a germ that can’t be treated with antibiotics? A no-kill-a-coccus!
Why did the bacteria always lose to the antibiotic in chess? It couldn’t resist the powerful check-mate move!
Why did the antibiotic go to therapy? It had a hard time dealing with the emotional baggage of constantly fighting off infections!
Why did the doctor prescribe an antibiotic to the math equation? Because it had too many “negative” factors!
Why did the bacteria refuse to take antibiotics? It believed in natural selection and survival of the fittest!
Why did the antibiotic become a stand-up comedian? It wanted to spread laughter and kill bacteria at the same time!
Why did the bacteria refuse to take antibiotics? Because they wanted to go viral instead!
Why did the bacteria throw a party? Because they finally found an antibiotic-free zone!
Why did the antibiotic go to therapy? It had a hard time killing off bacteria without feeling guilty!
Why did the bacteria refuse to listen to the antibiotic’s jokes? It said they were too viral!
What did the antibiotic say to the bacteria trying to attack it? “I’m sorry, but I’m not interested in a relationship, I’m here to eradicate you!”
Why did the antibiotic go to art school? It wanted to learn how to fight off all those pesky bacteria!
Why did the antibiotic get a promotion? It was outstanding in its field of fighting infections!
Why did the antibiotic become a stand-up comedian? It loved delivering killer punchlines against bacterial foes!
What did the antibiotic say to the bacteria that was causing trouble? “You better stop multiplying, or I’ll be forced to divide and conquer!”
Why did the antibiotic never get a promotion? It was too good at killing time!
Why did the bacteria throw a party? Because they heard the antibiotic was on vacation and couldn’t stop them from multiplying!
Why did the antibiotic go broke? It couldn’t stop spending all its cents on prescription drugs!
Why did the antibiotic become a teacher? It loved spreading knowledge about bacteria and how to eliminate them!
What do you call a bacterial fashion show? The Antibiotic Catwalk!
Why did the bacteria start a band? Because they heard antibiotics were good at killing beats!
Why did the antibiotic always win at poker? It had a great poker face, never showing its resistance!
Why did the antibiotic get kicked out of the bar? It couldn’t handle its alcohol!
Why did the bacteria refuse to go on a date with the antibiotic? It didn’t want to be under a lot of pressure!
What do you call a group of bacteria that loves antibiotics? The Infection Avengers!
Why did the bacteria go to the party? It heard there would be antibiotics on the dance floor!
Why did the antibiotic refuse to go on a blind date? It didn’t want to catch any unwanted infections!
Why did the antibiotic get kicked out of the party? It was causing too many bacterial infections on the dance floor!
Why did the doctor prescribe antibiotics to the math class? They needed help with their multiplication!
Why did the bacteria throw a party for antibiotics? They wanted to dance until the infection was gone!
Why did the germ refuse to take antibiotics? It didn’t want to ruin its reputation as a troublemaker!
Why did the antibiotic feel guilty? It was feeling resistant to change!
Why did the bacteria get a restraining order against antibiotics? They just couldn’t handle the commitment!
Why was the antibiotic never invited to parties? It always killed the mood by telling everyone about its bacterial conquests!
Why did the antibiotic refuse to work overtime? It didn’t want to get caught up in the never-ending bacteria battle!
Why did the antibiotic feel unappreciated? Because people only remembered it when they were sick and forgot about it once they got better!
Why did the antibiotic bring a map to the party? It wanted to make sure it didn’t miss any bacteria hotspots!
Why did the antibiotic join a gym? It wanted to stay fit and strong to fight off bacterial infections!
What did the antibiotic say to the patient? “Don’t worry, I’m here to fight off those pesky bacteria and make you feel “amoxicillin” better!”
Why did the bacteria go to therapy? It had separation anxiety from the antibiotics constantly trying to kill it!
Why did the antibiotic start a gardening club? It loved watching bacteria retreat in the face of its plant-based defenses!
Why did the antibiotic go to the party? Because it wanted to kill the mood, just like it kills bacteria!
Why did the antibiotic start writing poetry? It had a way with antibiotic verses!
Why did the antibiotic open a bakery? It wanted to make some dough!
Why did the antibiotic feel lonely? It couldn’t find any other medications it could relate to!
Why did the antibiotic break up with its partner? It felt like it wasn’t making a strong enough connection!
Why did the antibiotic break up with its partner? They were in different “strains” of life!
Why did the antibiotic feel lonely? It was always killing bacteria, but couldn’t find a match for itself!
Why did the bacteria file a complaint against the antibiotic? It accused it of prescribing too many side effects!
Why did the antibiotic go to the gym? It wanted to build up its strength to fight off even the toughest bacteria!
Why did the antibiotic fail its math test? It couldn’t divide and conquer like it can with bacteria!
Why did the doctor always carry antibiotics with him? Because he liked to be prepared for any resistance!
Why did the antibiotic refuse to take a vacation? It didn’t want to give the bacteria a chance to party!
What did the antibiotic say to the virus? “You’re no match for my bacteria-killing powers!”
Why did the bacteria refuse to take antibiotics? They didn’t want to be labeled as “dependent” organisms!
Why don’t antibiotics like to play cards? Because they’re afraid of getting “penicillin!”
Why was the antibiotic so confident? It knew it had the power to “fight off” any situation!
What did one antibiotic say to the other at a party? Let’s get together and cure a few infections!
Why did the antibiotic get a promotion at work? It had a knack for killing it in the lab!
What did one antibiotic say to the other at the party? “Let’s go out and kill some bacteria on the dance floor!”
Why did the antibiotic become a comedian? It had a knack for killing bacteria and making people laugh at the same time!
Why did the bacteria take a selfie? It wanted to capture the antibiotic resistance!
Why did the bacteria invite the antibiotic to the party? They wanted to see it dance and kill the vibe!
Why did the antibiotic fail the test? It couldn’t resist the temptation to kill bacteria!
What’s the favorite game of antibiotics? Pillow fight!
Why did the antibiotic go to therapy? It was dealing with a lot of bacterial resistance issues!
Why did the bacteria throw a party for the antibiotic? They wanted to show their appreciation for its work against their friends!
Why did the antibiotic start a book club? It wanted to discuss how to effectively eliminate bacterial characters from its favorite novels!
Why did the antibiotic break up with the painkiller? It thought it was a capsule of love!
Why did the antibiotic throw a party? It wanted to celebrate its successful battle against bacterial invaders!
Why did the bacteria start a band? It wanted to perform antibiotic rock ‘n’ roll!
Why did the bacteria go to the gym after taking antibiotics? It wanted to build resistance muscles!
What did the antibiotic say to the germ? “I’m going to make you feel so much better, you won’t even recognize yourself!”
Why did the antibiotic always feel lonely? It couldn’t find anyone to bond with on a cellular level!
Why did the antibiotic go to school? It wanted to get a good education on fighting infections!
What’s the best way to make antibiotics laugh? Give them a dose of penicillin, it’s always good for a chuckle!
Why did the bacteria get kicked out of the party? It refused to stop multiplying and dividing all night long!
Why do antibiotics never feel lonely? Because they always have lots of bacterial friends to hang out with!
What did the antibiotic say when it won the lottery? “I’m going to cure all the infections with my newfound wealth!”
Why did the bacteria go to therapy? It had a culture problem!
What did the antibiotic say to the bacteria at the gym? “You can’t handle the disinfectant!”
Why did the antibiotic go to the casino? It wanted to try its luck at beating the odds of bacterial growth!
Why do antibiotics make great comedians? They always know how to deliver a punchline that leaves bacteria in stitches!
Why did the antibiotic refuse to fight? It wanted to promote peace among bacteria!
Why did the bacteria cross the road? To infect the chicken with antibiotic resistance!
Why did the antibiotic refuse to get a tattoo? It didn’t want to become resistant to ink!
Why did the antibiotic refuse to go to the party? It heard there would be a lot of bacteria dancing!
Why did the antibiotic join a sports team? It wanted to score against bacterial opponents!
How do antibiotics like to party? They bring their own bacteria killer – the disco-very!
Why did the doctor prescribe antibiotics to the piano? It had a bad case of key-sore throat!
Why did the antibiotic break up with its significant other? It said they just didn’t have the right chemistry!
Why was the antibiotic constantly worried? It had a lot of bacteria on its mind!
Why did the bacteria start a band? Because they thought they could resist the antibiotics by playing some resistant tunes!
Why did the antibiotic go to therapy? It was feeling ineffective and needed some self-help!
What do you call a germ that likes to play sports? Antibiotic athlete!
Why did the antibiotic break up with the painkiller? It said they were not compatible and couldn’t see eye to eye!
What did one antibiotic say to the other? “Let’s team up and wipe out those resistant bacteria!”
Why did the antibiotic become a lawyer? It wanted to defend itself against the accusations of causing antibiotic resistance!
Why did the antibiotic have a great sense of humor? Because it knew how to cure people with laughter, especially those with sore throats!
Why did the antibiotic feel lonely? Because it couldn’t make any friends with bacteria anymore!
Why did the antibiotic join a gym? It wanted to build some muscular resistance to fight off infections!
Why did the bacteria get a prescription for antibiotics? It couldn’t stop coughing up bad puns!
Why did the bacteria feel unappreciated? It worked hard to kill, but everyone only cared about the antibiotic!
Why did the bacteria go on vacation? It needed some time off from the antibiotics!
Why did the bacteria refuse to listen to the antibiotic’s advice? It thought it was just trying to prescribe its own agenda!
How did the antibiotic win the poker game? It had the best hands – all full of bacteria-killing power!
Why did the antibiotic start a band? It wanted to produce some killer beats and wipe out all the bad vibes!
Why did the bacteria hire a lawyer? It wanted to sue the antibiotic for invasion of privacy!
Why was the antibiotic always invited to parties? It knew how to kill bacteria and make everyone germ-free fun!
Why did the antibiotic get kicked out of the party? It was spreading too much resistance!
What did the antibiotic say to the germ? “It’s time for you to be cultured!”
Why did the antibiotic go broke? It couldn’t make enough “cents” to fight infection!
Why did the doctor prescribe antibiotics to the computer? Because it had a virus and needed some anti-bugs!
Why did the antibiotic get into a fight with the painkiller? They had a disagreement over who had the stronger effect on the body!
Why did the antibiotic get a promotion at work? It always showed resistance to difficult situations!
Why did the bacteria get kicked out of the party? Because the antibiotics showed up and ruined their fun!
Why did the bacteria start a fitness club? It wanted to strengthen its resistance against antibiotics!
Why did the bacteria refuse to take antibiotics? It didn’t want to give up its antibiotic-free lifestyle!
How did the antibiotic console its friend who was feeling down? It told them, “Don’t worry, I’ll always be here to support you, just like a bacterial enzyme inhibitor!”
Why did the bacteria cross the road? To escape from the antibiotic chasing it!
How do antibiotics party? They throw a penicillin rave and invite all the bacteria to join in the fun!
Why did the antibiotic have a lot of friends? It was very good at killing bacteria and making allies!
Why did the antibiotic get a job as a comedian? It wanted to kill with laughter and not just bacteria!
Why did the antibiotic start cooking? It wanted to whip up a dish that could kill any bacteria!
What did one antibiotic say to the other at the bar? “Let’s drink till we’re resistant to everything!”
Why did the antibiotic go to therapy? It couldn’t cope with all the resistance it was facing!
Why did the antibiotic go to art school? It wanted to study the “ill” ustration!
Why did the antibiotic go to school? Because it wanted to be well-educated on fighting bacteria!
Why did the antibiotic have a great sense of humor? It was always killing it with its puns!
Why did the antibiotic break up with its significant other? It just couldn’t get over their resistance to commitment!
Why did the antibiotic want to be a comedian? It heard laughter is the best medicine!
Why did the antibiotic always have good manners? It believed in killing bacteria with politeness!
Why did the antibiotic become a comedian? It wanted to make people laugh while killing off those pesky bacteria!
Why did the antibiotic file a lawsuit? It felt it was being taken for granted, always being prescribed without any appreciation!
What did the antibiotic say to the virus? “I’m not your type, I only work against bacteria!”
Why did the antibiotic blush when talking to the virus? It was love at first sight – it just couldn’t resist that reproduction rate!
What’s an antibiotic’s favorite type of music? “Peni-cillin and the Microbe Beats!”
Why did the antibiotic go to school? It wanted to learn about the birds and the bacilli!
Why did the antibiotic go to the casino? It wanted to play slots of bacteria!
Why did the antibiotic join the theater? It loved performing antibiotic monologues!
Why did the antibiotic go to school? To learn about bacterial multiplication!
Why did the doctor become an antibiotic? He wanted to cure the bacteria blues!

Antibiotics Joke Generator

Crafting the perfect antibiotics joke can sometimes feel like you’ve caught a humor infection.

(No need to prescribe laughter, right?)

That’s where our FREE Antibiotics Joke Generator comes in to cure your comedic woes.

Engineered to mix witty medical terminology, infectious humor, and playful punchlines, it generates jokes guaranteed to heal any gloomy mood.

Don’t let your humor catch a cold.

Use our joke generator to create jokes that are as fresh and lively as your antibiotics.

FAQs About Antibiotics Jokes

Why are antibiotics jokes popular?

Antibiotics jokes are popular because they blend humor with a topic that is both relatable and commonplace.

Given that most people have taken antibiotics at some point, these jokes present a fun way to laugh at our shared experiences with this type of medication.

Can antibiotics jokes help in social situations?

Absolutely!

Telling a good joke can help to break the ice and lighten the mood in a variety of social situations.

Given the commonality of antibiotics use, these jokes can often resonate with a wide audience, sparking laughter and conversation.

How can I come up with my own antibiotics jokes?

Research the characteristics and common uses of antibiotics, such as their ability to kill bacteria or treat certain illnesses.
Consider the vocabulary associated with antibiotics. Words like resistant, prescription, or side effects can provide interesting angles for humor.
Reflect on your personal experiences or common scenarios involving antibiotics. Maybe there’s humor in the struggle of remembering to take a dose?
Think about popular phrases or sayings that could be twisted to include antibiotics. A play on words can be highly entertaining!
Embrace puns and wordplay. Much like in medicine, unexpected combinations can yield great results in humor!

Are there any tips for remembering antibiotics jokes?

Tying antibiotics jokes to common scenarios or experiences—like a doctor’s visit, taking medicine, or recovering from an illness—can help them stick in your memory.

The more you can associate a joke with a real-life situation, the easier it will be to recall.

How can I make my antibiotics jokes better?

To improve your antibiotics jokes, play around with timing and delivery.

Sometimes, the way a joke is told can be just as important as the content.

Be sure to familiarize yourself with your audience and tailor your humor to suit their tastes.

How does the Antibiotics Joke Generator work?

Our Antibiotics Joke Generator is designed to provide quick and easy laughs!

Simply enter keywords related to your specific humor or situation, and press the Generate Jokes button.

In no time, you’ll have a collection of amusing antibiotics jokes at your disposal.

Is the Antibiotics Joke Generator free?

Yes, our Antibiotics Joke Generator is completely free to use.

Generate as many jokes as you like and keep your audience entertained.

It’s a fun and easy way to inject some humor into your content!

Conclusion

Antibiotics jokes are a humorous way to inject a dose of laughter into daily chatter, making life a bit more enjoyable with each chuckle.

From the quick and snappy to the long and rib-tickling, there’s an antibiotics joke for every situation.

So next time you’re taking a pill, remember, there’s humor to be found in every capsule, tablet, and liquid form.

Keep spreading the laughs, and let the good times pill and spill.

Because after all, a day without laughter is like a day without antibiotics—unthinkable and, frankly, a bit less healthy.

Happy joking, everyone!

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FAQs About Antibiotics Jokes

Why are antibiotics jokes popular?

Can antibiotics jokes help in social situations?

How can I come up with my own antibiotics jokes?

Are there any tips for remembering antibiotics jokes?

How can I make my antibiotics jokes better?

How does the Antibiotics Joke Generator work?

Is the Antibiotics Joke Generator free?

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FAQs About Antibiotics Jokes

Why are antibiotics jokes popular?

Can antibiotics jokes help in social situations?

How can I come up with my own antibiotics jokes?

Are there any tips for remembering antibiotics jokes?

How can I make my antibiotics jokes better?

How does the Antibiotics Joke Generator work?

Is the Antibiotics Joke Generator free?

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