602 Calzone Jokes for a Slice of Humor

If you’re here, it means you’re ready to take a bite out of the world of calzone jokes.

Not just any jokes, but the ones filled to the brim with humor.

That’s why we’ve baked up a list of the most hilarious calzone jokes.

From cheesy puns to saucy one-liners, our compilation has a joke for every slice of life.

So, let’s dig into the stuffed crust of calzone humor, one joke at a time.

Contents show

Calzone Jokes

Calzone jokes are a delicious treat that will leave you laughing out loud!

These tasty morsels of humor are not just about the Italian folded pizza itself, but also about the culture, tradition and the funny peculiarities that surround it.

From its hearty fillings to its half-moon shape, calzones provide a rich source of inspiration for wisecracks.

Creating the ideal calzone joke involves a healthy portion of wit, a dash of playfulness, and a hearty appetite for humor.

Who knew the world of Italian cuisine could provide such a banquet of belly laughs?

Whether you’re a die-hard calzone enthusiast or just a lover of food-related humor, these calzone jokes are sure to tickle your funny bone.

Get ready to fold into giggles with these hilarious calzone puns and jokes:

How did the calzone respond when asked if it was a sandwich? It said, “I’m more of a folded pizza, but don’t fold me against the sandwich definition!”
What’s a calzone’s favorite dance move? The dough-see-dough!
What did the calzone say when it got a job offer? I’m going to be making a lot of dough!
Why did the calzone become a firefighter? It wanted to stop the dough-mestic fires.
What did one calzone say to the other calzone at the party? I’m feeling a little saucy tonight!
Why don’t calzones make good detectives? They always give themselves away with their cheesy filling.
How did the calzone become a millionaire? It dough-larized its talents.
Why did the calzone win the marathon? It had a great running dough-ughnut.
Why did the calzone break up with its bread partner? They were just too crusty together!
What did one calzone say to the other? We’re just two halves of a whole cheesy relationship!
How do you get a calzone’s attention? You pepper-own it.
Why did the calzone start a fitness routine? It wanted to be a well-toned dough-ball.
Why did the calzone get in trouble at school? It couldn’t stop folding under pressure!
Why was the calzone always so stressed out? It couldn’t keep its filling together.
How did the calzone win the cooking competition? It had a lot of dough-main advantage!
How do you make a calzone laugh? You pepperoni with jokes!
Why was the calzone a terrible comedian? It always ran out of cheesy punchlines!
How does a calzone exercise? By doing ‘rolling’ planks!
What did the calzone say to the cheese? I can’t stop feeling saucy around you!
Why was the calzone running late for the meeting? It got stuck in a traffic jam-pizza.
What did the calzone say when it won the beauty pageant? I’m the most foldable of them all!
Why did the calzone join a gym? It wanted to get more toned and cheesy!
Why did the calzone break up with the garlic bread? It couldn’t handle the intense loaf affair.
Why did the calzone go to the art class? It wanted to learn how to fold itself into a masterpiece.
What did the calzone say when it won the lottery? “I’m feeling pretty dough-lighted!”
Why did the calzone start exercising? It wanted to stay in shape and avoid becoming a flabby fold!
Why did the calzone join a gym? It wanted to get into shape and roll with the doughs.
What do you call a calzone with a Ph.D.? A doctorate of deliciousness.
Why did the calzone get arrested? It couldn’t stop dough-ing illegal activities!
Why did the calzone become a comedian? It wanted to be a roll model.
Why did the calzone never win at poker? It always folded too soon.
Why did the calzone become a firefighter? It wanted to learn how to handle the heat.
What did the calzone say to the pizza? I’m just a little more “foldable” than you.
Why did the calzone break up with the pizza? It found someone more filling!
What do you call a calzone that’s always in a hurry? Fast “foolishini”!
How does a calzone get its hair done? With pizza rollers.
Why did the calzone always win the poker game? It had a great poker face, filled with cheese.
What did the calzone say when asked about its love life? I’m still waiting for my perfect “fold” mate.
Why did the calzone win an award? It was just too stuffed with greatness!
Why was the calzone cold? Because it forgot to turn on the oven!
Why did the calzone refuse to go on a date? It was too stuffed to handle any more dough-mance.
Why did the calzone get into a fight with the pizza? It wanted a piece of the action.
What did the calzone say to the pizza? “You’re a little cheesy, but I can fold with you.”
Why did the calzone fail the job interview? It couldn’t handle the stress of being stuffed with responsibility.
How do you know if a calzone is good at math? It always knows how to divide itself perfectly in half.
Why did the calzone refuse to go on a date with the sandwich? It didn’t want to get wrapped up in a messy relationship.
Why did the calzone have trouble making friends? It was always too cheesy!
How do you make a calzone laugh? Just give it a good “dough-pat” on the back!
What did the calzone say when it was caught cheating? I can’t help it, I’m just a little saucy.
Why was the calzone always running late? Because it couldn’t find the right dough-cument!
What did the calzone say to the mushroom? You’re a fungi to be around.
Why did the calzone run for president? It believed in a stuffed crust future!
What did the calzone say to the pizza? Fold me closer, tiny dough dancer.
Why was the calzone always worried? It had a lot of dough-cisions to make!
Why was the calzone always invited to parties? Because it’s always a good “fold” time!
What did the calzone say to the pizza? “I’m just a little ‘folded’ on the inside!”
What did the calzone say to the pizza? You’re just a flat-out disappointment!
What do you call a calzone with a broken heart? A pizza turnover!
How do you make a calzone laugh? Give it a ‘topping’ of humor!
Why did the calzone break up with the garlic knot? It wasn’t a good twist in the relationship.
What do you call a calzone that can play piano? A dough-minant performer!
How does a calzone greet its friends? With a big, cheesy “hello”!
Why did the calzone become a comedian? It wanted to get a rise out of the audience!
What do you call a calzone that’s afraid of the dark? A scared turnover!
Why was the calzone always invited to parties? It had a great taste in filling!
Why did the calzone always win at poker? It knew how to fold ’em!
How do calzones get fit? They do a lot of “dough-lates” exercises.
What did the calzone say to the pizza? You’ve got a lot of crust to take care of.
What’s a calzone’s favorite TV show? Breaking Bread!
What did the calzone say when it won the beauty contest? “I’m the ‘crust’ of the crop!”
Why did the calzone go to the art museum? It wanted to appreciate some crust-ic masterpieces!
Why did the calzone bring a pencil to its cooking class? It wanted to “fill” in the blanks.
What did one calzone say to the other calzone? “You’ve got a lot of filling potential!”
How did the calzone greet its friends? With a big doughy hug!
Why did the calzone get a job as a magician? It wanted to turn into a pizza whenever it pleased!
What did the calzone say to the cheese? “You’re the grate-est topping!”
How do calzones like to travel? In “dough”ble-decker buses.
What did the calzone say to the pizza? You’ve got some big saucy shoes to fill!
Why did the calzone go to the gym? It wanted to get a good workout, no matter how cheesy it felt!
What do you get when you cross a calzone with a computer? A byte-sized snack.
How did the calzone become a successful actor? It knew how to deliver a good crust performance!
Why was the calzone a terrible singer? It couldn’t hit the right notes, it was always a little flat.
What did the calzone say to the panini? Let’s fold together forever.
How do you turn a calzone into gold? Put it under the broil-er!
What did the calzone say to the pizza? We’re just two “crusts” in a pod.
What did the calzone say to the pizza? I’m feeling a little crusty today.
Why did the calzone become a detective? It had a knack for finding hidden fillings!
Why did the calzone become an actor? It wanted to perform its own dough-logues!
Why was the calzone so good at solving puzzles? It had a lot of filling in the blanks.
Why did the calzone start a vegetable garden? It wanted to grow its own dough-tatoes!
What’s a calzone’s favorite way to travel? In its dough-nut shaped spaceship!
Why did the calzone take up yoga? It wanted to become one with its cheesy inner self!
Why did the calzone become a mathematician? It loved working with pi!
How does a calzone ask someone out on a date? “Wanna get folded together?”

Short Calzone Jokes

Short calzone jokes are like a well-stuffed calzone—compact, flavorful, and surprisingly amusing.

These jokes are perfect for text messages, social media posts, or when you want to lighten the mood at a get-together with a quick chuckle.

The true charm of short calzone jokes is their ability to be both saucy and cheesy, serving up a hearty laugh in just a few words.

And now, as if fresh from the oven, here are short calzone jokes that deliver a robust laugh in just a few words.

Why was the calzone upset? It felt crumby after getting baked!
How does a calzone like to travel? In a doughmestic flight!
What’s a calzone’s favorite exercise? Folding and stretching dough!
Why was the calzone always cold? It had a chilly reception!
What do you call a calzone that’s a great dancer? A turn-and-twirlover!
How does a calzone like its pizza? Stuffed crust-style!
What did the calzone say to the chef? “You’re a crusty character!”
Why was the calzone always late? It couldn’t find a parking slice!
What do you call a calzone that tells jokes? A dough-lightful comedian!
Why was the calzone always on time? It had a pizza mind!
How do you fix a broken calzone? With tomato paste!
Why did the calzone get an award? It was the most folded!
Why did the calzone wear sunglasses? To avoid the pizza-paparazzi!
How do you know a calzone is angry? It’s all folded up!
Why did the calzone go to therapy? It needed some fold-fashioned counseling!
How do calzones like to relax? They just wanna roll with it!
What did the calzone say to the oven? You’re my hot spot!
Why did the calzone start meditating? It wanted to find inner pizza!
What did the calzone say to the pizza? Can we fold together?
How did the calzone become a famous actor? It had great dough-tential!
What do you call a calzone that loves music? A “melodoughs” calzone!
Why did the calzone win the award? It was a filling performance!
Why did the calzone become an artist? It loved working with dough-cumentaries!
What did the calzone wear to the beach? A pepperoni bikini!
How did the calzone win the race? It was on a roll!
What did the calzone say to the breadstick? You’re so twisted!
What’s a calzone’s favorite exercise? The dough-kick!
What do you call a calzone that talks too much? A Gabzone!
What did the calzone say to the chef? I knead your expertise!
How did the calzone win the race? It had a good crust!
What do you call a calzone who is always late? Fashionably dough-layed!
How did the calzone propose? It said, “Will you marry-cone me?”

Calzone Jokes One-Liners

Calzone jokes one-liners are the epitome of humor compacted into a single, delicious sentence.

They are the verbal equivalent of biting into a piping hot calzone – surprising, delightful, and effortlessly satisfying.

Crafting a clever one-liner demands a unique blend of wit, precision, and a deep appreciation for the craft of punning.

The challenge is to stuff both the setup and punchline into a concise format, delivering maximum flavor with minimal fluff.

Here’s to hoping these calzone one-liners find you stuffed with laughter:

Why did the calzone become a fashion designer? It knew how to accessorize with cheese.
My friend said I should open a calzone bakery, but I told him I kneaded some more dough to make that happen.
I asked my calzone if it was a morning person. It said, “Not really, I’m more of a dough-lazy individual.”
The best part about eating a calzone is the feeling of warm dough hugging your taste buds.
Why did the calzone throw a party? It wanted to show everyone that it’s not just a plain dough ball.
Why did the calzone go on a diet? It needed to cut back on the extra cheese.
Why did the calzone go to the comedy club? It wanted to get its dough rising with laughter.
What did the calzone say to the pizza? I’m just a little foldy, but you’re a real slice!
What did the calzone say when it won the lottery? I’m finally rolling in the dough!
I ordered a calzone with extra cheese, but I think they misheard me because it came with a cheesy pickup line instead.
Why did the calzone become an actor? Because it wanted to be a pizza thespian!
I asked the calzone if it wanted to be friends, but it just folded on me.
I asked my calzone if it was ready to be eaten and it replied, “I’m just gonna need a little more time to warm up.” It’s definitely got a cheesy sense of humor.
I accidentally dropped a calzone on the floor, and my dog said, “That’s just a pizza folded in half!” Dogs can be so judgmental.
Why did the calzone break up with the garlic knots? It couldn’t handle the endless garlic breath.
Why did the calzone get invited to all the parties? It was always a great fold.
What did the calzone say to the sandwich? You can’t fold like me, bread!
Why did the calzone break up with the breadstick? It just couldn’t roll with the dough anymore!
I tried to introduce my calzone to my spaghetti, but they didn’t get along. It seems they have a “pasta-tense” relationship.
What’s a calzone’s favorite part of a joke? The punchline.
Why don’t calzones make good comedians? They’re always too cheesy!
What do you call a calzone that’s always on time? Punctual turnover.
You know you’re in love when you prefer cuddling with a calzone over a human being.
Why did the calzone go to the art gallery? It wanted to become a masterpiece in dough-nation!
What do you call a calzone that can’t stop talking? A chatty dough pocket.
What do you call a calzone that’s been left in the oven for too long? A hot pocket.
I asked the calzone if it had any cheesy pickup lines, but it just said, “I’m too stuffed to think straight.”
Why did the calzone break up with its topping? It said it needed some space to crust over the relationship.
Why did the calzone win the marathon? It had the perfect recipe for a good run.
How did the calzone propose to its loved one? With a cheesy pickup line, saying, “You complete me… with your delicious filling!”
What did the calzone say after a long day at work? I kneaded a break!
Why did the calzone become a chef? It kneaded a career change.
Why did the calzone get promoted? It had a lot of filling qualifications.
I asked my calzone if it wanted to go for a walk, but it said it was feeling a little doughy.
Why did the calzone become a stand-up comedian? Because it always had a good delivery!
What did the calzone say to the astronaut? Take me to the moon, I’m out of this world!
Why was the calzone always surrounded by friends? It had great filling qualities.
Why did the calzone join a gym? It wanted to get in shape and be a real hottie with extra cheese!
I asked the calzone if it had any plans for the weekend, and it said it was going to relax and get a little saucy.
What’s a calzone’s favorite way to travel? By folding bike!
Why did the calzone become a chef? It couldn’t handle the heat!
Why did the calzone go to the spa? It needed to relax its cheesy filling!
What did the calzone say to the salad? Lettuce join forces and create a delicious combo!
Why did the calzone take up yoga? It wanted to learn how to find inner pizza-peace.
I told my calzone a joke, but it didn’t laugh. It said it was too “stuffed” to find it funny.
I tried to tell a joke about a calzone, but it was too cheesy and everyone just rolled their eyes.
Why don’t calzones ever win at poker? They always fold.
I asked my calzone if it believed in love at first bite. It replied, “Only if it’s stuffed with cheese.”
What do you call a calzone that steals the show? The real dough-minator!
What did the calzone say to the chef? “You’re really kneady, but I think I’m well-rounded.”
What did the calzone say to the pepperoni? “You complete me, pizza slice.”
Why did the calzone start taking acting classes? It wanted to be the star of the pizza show!
Why was the calzone bad at making friends? It always ended up being a little bit too cheesy.
What did the calzone say to the pasta? You can’t fold as perfectly as I do.
Why did the calzone call the pizza a show-off? Because it was always “topping” the charts!
What did the calzone say when it got a promotion? “I’m feeling stuffed with success!”
What did the calzone say to the pizza? I’m in a fold of my own!
I asked the calzone if it wanted to come to the party, but it folded under the pressure.
What did the calzone say when it won the lottery? “Now I can finally afford some extra cheese!”
I tried to impress my date by making a heart-shaped calzone, but it turned out more like a misshapen love handle.
I told my calzone a joke, but it didn’t find it very funny. I guess it couldn’t handle the cheesy humor!
What’s a calzone’s favorite sport? Fold ball!
What did one calzone say to the other calzone at the party? “You’re really crusty, but I like you!”
Why did the calzone go to the gym? It wanted to get in shape and be a lean dough machine.
I’m training to become a professional calzone eater – it’s all about folding my goals!
How did the calzone become a detective? It was always good at uncovering secrets.
I told my calzone it was beautiful, and it replied, “I know, I’m the full package.” It really knows how to fold compliments.
Why did the calzone start a band? It was tired of being a solo dough artist.
Why did the calzone break up with its partner? They wanted to see other fillings.
I told my friend I wanted a calzone, and they said I was being a bit too cheesy.
I asked my calzone if it wanted to join a pizza party, but it said it wanted to be a “solo-stuffed” artist.
Why did the calzone visit the dentist? It had a cavity that needed filling, but only with mozzarella, please!
What do you call a calzone that’s full of itself? Stuffed crusty.
Why did the calzone go to therapy? Because it was feeling a little bit too cheesy.
What did the calzone say when asked about its favorite exercise? “I’m a big fan of the dough-si-do!”
How does a calzone apologize? It says, “I’m sorry if I ever got a little too saucy.”
What did the calzone say to the pizza when they went on a date? “Let’s make some dough together!”
I asked the calzone if it wanted to go out, but it said it needed some time to crust over.
What did the calzone say to the pizza? “You’re a bit cheesy, but I’m more of a fold-over perfectionist.”
Why did the calzone blush? It saw the pepperoni strip tease.
My calzone told me it wanted to pursue a career in comedy, I guess it really wants to become a “rolling” stone.
What do you call a calzone that tells jokes? A pizza with a funny bone!
What do you call a calzone that can’t make up its mind? A flip-flopping dough ball.
If a calzone can’t find a job, it becomes a pizza pocket. Life can be so “fold” of surprises.
What did the calzone say to the pizza? You can’t top me, I’m a pocket full of deliciousness.
I tried to eat a calzone with a fork and knife, but it told me to fold myself.
What did the calzone say to the hungry person? It’s a pizza inside a pizza – double the pleasure!
Why did the calzone become an actor? It wanted to show off its incredible “dough-mination” skills.
What do you call a calzone that’s always in a rush? A speedy turnover!
Why did the calzone go to therapy? It had too many layers of emotional baggage to unpack.
What do you call a calzone that falls in love easily? A heart-stuffed romantic.
Why did the calzone break up with the pizza? They couldn’t find common crust.
What did the calzone say to the breadsticks? “I’m feeling a bit saucy today, let’s dip together!”
What did the calzone say to the oven? Bake me until I’m golden and delicious!
Why did the calzone refuse to play cards? It didn’t want to get folded in a poker face.
I tried making a calzone once, but it turned out to be a real dough-stastrophe.
Why did the calzone bring a parachute to the party? In case it needed to bail out!
What’s a calzone’s favorite movie genre? Fold-fashioned comedies!
The calzone’s favorite dance move is the “fold and shuffle”
What did the calzone say to the pizza? “You’re a little too flat for my taste.”
What did the calzone say to the pizza when it was feeling spicy? “I’m on a roll, jalapeño business!”
What did the calzone say to the breadsticks? “You’re just a bunch of dough-wannabes!”
I tried to make a calzone joke, but it fell flat…just like a poorly folded calzone.
If you’re ever feeling down, just remember that a calzone is always there to provide a cheesy pick-me-up.
I told my calzone a secret, but it couldn’t keep it. It said it had too many “leaks” in its filling.
What did the calzone say to the pizza? “You’re just a wannabe calzone, always trying to be folded like me!”
Why did the calzone become a comedian? It couldn’t resist delivering cheesy punchlines.
How did the calzone celebrate its birthday? By throwing a surprise party inside itself.
Why did the calzone refuse to go to the party? It didn’t want to get folded into a corner.
What do you call a calzone that’s afraid of the oven? A doughnut hole in the making.
Why don’t calzones ever win an argument? They always fold under pressure.
I’m a calzone connoisseur, my life is filled with dough and cheesy goodness.
I asked the calzone if it wanted a slice of pizza. It replied, “Fold it, I’m stuffed!”
Why did the calzone ask for a raise? It kneaded the dough.
What do you call a calzone that is always running late? A procrastinazone!
The calzone told me it was the life of the party because it always got a rise out of people.
Why was the calzone such a great comedian? It always had the perfect delivery!
Why did the calzone go to the gym? It wanted to get into shape, but it ended up just getting stuffed!
What did the calzone say to the pizza? “I’m just a folded slice with an identity crisis.”
What’s a calzone’s favorite song? “I Wanna Hold Your Fold.”
Why did the calzone start a band? Because it wanted to be a dough-minant force in the music industry!
What did the calzone say to the pepperoni? You’re my perfect match, we’re filling together!
Why don’t calzones ever get into trouble? They always keep a low profile.
Why did the calzone start taking yoga classes? It wanted to be more flexible with its fillings!
What did the calzone say to the garlic knots? You’re not my bread and butter.
I tried to give my calzone a compliment, but it just told me it was “filled” with joy. It’s a real cheesy jokester.
I tried to eat a calzone while running, but it was just too doughy-namic.
Why was the calzone bad at math? It couldn’t figure out how to divide itself into equal slices!
Why did the calzone go on strike? It didn’t want to be folded in half anymore.
Why did the calzone start a band? It had a lot of potential to be a great fold group.
Why did the calzone get a tattoo? It wanted to be more than just a cheesy filling.
I heard a rumor that the calzone was a secret agent, but it was just undercover as a pizza slice.
What did the calzone say when it won the award? It was a big pizza my heart moment.
What’s a calzone’s favorite holiday? Pi day, of course!
What do you get when you cross a calzone with a quesadilla? A folded fiesta.
Why did the calzone become a doctor? It wanted to learn how to treat the dough-matic stress disorder.
Why did the calzone start a band? It wanted to show off its incredible dough-ability.
Why did the calzone refuse to go on a diet? It didn’t want to fold under the pressure!
The calzone and the pizza had a competition, but the calzone always folded under pressure.

Calzone Dad Jokes

Calzone dad jokes are the ideal mix of playful puns and tasteful humor that will get everyone around the dinner table rolling their eyes and chuckling simultaneously.

They’re the type of jokes that are so cheesy, they’re actually irresistible.

These jokes are perfect for family get-togethers, pizza parties, or when you simply want to add a dash of humor to your day.

Prepare for some hearty laughter and some louder groans.

Here are some mouthwatering calzone dad jokes that are ready to serve:

Why did the calzone take a nap? It wanted to rest before getting baked!
Why was the calzone always nervous during tests? It was afraid of being folded under pressure!
Why did the calzone go to the art museum? It wanted to see the “Famous Folds” exhibit.
What did the calzone say to the breadstick? “You’re a great crust!” .
What did the calzone say when it was feeling stuffed? I knead a break!
Why did the calzone always win at poker? It had a great poker face, folded perfectly every time!
What’s a calzone’s favorite type of exercise? Dough-nuts!
What’s a calzone’s favorite song? “I Want to Hold Your Filling” by The Beatles!
How do you spot a calzone at a party? It’s always in a foldable state!
Why did the calzone win the talent show? It had the best dough-lls!
How did the calzone propose to his girlfriend? He gave her a ring of dough!
Why was the calzone always the life of the party? Because it was always stuffed with jokes.
Why did the calzone become a teacher? It wanted to educate the dough.
Why was the calzone so good at math? It knew how to divide itself into equal portions.
What do you call a calzone that sings? A mozzarella-rella-rella.
What did the calzone say to the chef? Don’t be cheesy, just fold me and bake me already!
Why did the calzone refuse to play cards? It couldn’t handle the knead for a gamble!
How does a calzone get fit? It does a lot of “rolling” exercises!
What do you call a calzone that can sing? A dough-ray-me calzone.
How did the calzone propose to its partner? It got down on one knee and said, “Will you be my filling mate?”
What did the calzone say to the slice of pizza? You’re just a half-baked imposter!
Why did the calzone become a comedian? It kneaded a good laugh!
Why was the calzone always late to work? It couldn’t find its mozzarella motivation.
Why did the calzone never get invited to parties? It always brought too much dough!
Why was the calzone so successful in business? It always had a good crust fund!
Why did the calzone go to the art gallery? It wanted to get a slice of culture.
What’s a calzone’s favorite type of music? Fold music, of course!
How does a calzone express its love? It says, “You’re my main squeeze-cheese!”
Why did the calzone go to space? It wanted to be the first food on the moon.
What did the calzone say when it won an award? I’m just a really well-rounded individual!
Why did the calzone become a math teacher? It loved teaching about angles and triangles!
What did the calzone say to the pepperoni? You really spice up my life!
Why did the calzone win the award? Because it was super dough-performing!
Why did the calzone become a comedian? It wanted to make everyone laugh their crusts off!
Why did the calzone always win at poker? It had a lot of dough to play with!
What do you call a calzone with superpowers? A hero in a half-fold!
Why did the calzone go to therapy? Because it couldn’t hold its fillings!
Why did the calzone get a job as a math teacher? It was good at finding the perfect angle.
Why did the calzone go skydiving? It wanted to experience the ultimate cheesy thrill!
What did the calzone say to the hungry person? I’m just a pocket full of deliciousness!
What do you call a calzone that’s telling jokes? A comedian turnover!
What do you call a calzone that’s a good dancer? A dough ballerina!
Why was the calzone a great comedian? It always delivered a cheesy punchline!
Why did the calzone bring a calculator to the party? To split the bill evenly!
Why did the calzone go to school? It wanted to learn the art of being a perfectly stuffed pastry!
What do you call a calzone that tells good jokes? A pizza with a great sense of humor!
What did the calzone say to the pizza? I’m all stuffed inside, but you’ve got a great crust!
What do you call a calzone that’s out of shape? A dough-ball!
Why did the calzone break up with the pizza? It couldn’t handle all the toppings weighing it down!
What do you call a calzone that’s been working out? A muscle marinara.
Why did the calzone start a band? Because it wanted to make some “dough-re-mi”
What do you call a calzone that’s been on a diet? A thin-crust calzone!
What did the calzone say to the chef? “You fold me up so nicely!”
Why did the calzone visit the art gallery? It was hoping to find some pizza-terpieces!
How did the calzone propose to its significant other? With a cheesy crust and a promise to always be folded together!
Why did the calzone never become an actor? It couldn’t get a pizza the spotlight.
Why did the calzone bring a map to the party? It didn’t want to get folded in the wrong direction.
Why did the calzone go to therapy? It had too many trust issues with being folded up all the time.
What did the calzone say to the pizza at the party? You’re so cheesy!
What do you call a calzone that’s missing its filling? An imposter!
Why was the calzone always invited to parties? It always knew how to fill the dough-namic!
Why did the calzone go to the art museum? It wanted to learn about all the different folds and layers of creativity.
What do you call a calzone that has won a million dollars? A dough-lar calzone!
Why did the calzone get a passport? It wanted to travel the world and meet different fillings!
How did the calzone get a promotion? It kneaded the dough!
How did the calzone become an astronaut? It just needed some space!
Why was the calzone always cold? It didn’t have enough layers to keep warm.
What do you call a calzone that’s feeling spicy? A jalapen-dough!
Why did the calzone refuse to go skydiving? It was afraid it would burst its cheesy seams.
How did the calzone propose to its significant other? It said, “Will you be my cheesy better half?”
Why did the calzone get into a fight? It wanted to prove it was a tough dough-nut!
How do you make a calzone laugh? Poke it with a rolling pin and watch it crack up!
Why did the calzone fail the math test? It couldn’t figure out pi.
What do you call a calzone that’s always happy? A jolly roll-y!
How do you know if a calzone is happy? It’s always feeling dough-lightful!
What did the calzone say to the pizza? “You’ve got a pizza my heart!”
What did the calzone say to the chef? You really know how to fold me!
How did the calzone propose to his girlfriend? He gave her a dough-nut ring and said, “You’re my perfect filling.”
What did the calzone say when it won the beauty pageant? It’s all about the inner cheese-ty.
What did the calzone say to the pizza? Can I get a pizza your dough?
Why was the calzone so good at math? It always knew the right angles to fold itself.
What did the calzone say to the pizza? “You wanna go for a roll?”
Why did the calzone go to the baseball game? It wanted to catch a good dough-ground ball!
Why did the calzone go to the art gallery? It wanted to see some dough-realisim paintings!
Why did the calzone go to the gym? To get a good “workout” and stay in shape.
How do you know a calzone is a great listener? It always has its “ear” folded toward you.
Why did the calzone become a musician? It wanted to serenade everyone with its cheesy melodies!
What do you get when you cross a calzone and a sandwich? A foldable feast.
What do you call a calzone that’s running for president? A dough-mestic candidate!
Why did the calzone get a promotion? It always rose to the occasion!
Why was the calzone always invited to parties? It always brought a lot of filling entertainment.
Why did the calzone go to school? To get a little more “dough” in its life.
Why did the calzone become a magician? It loved disappearing into the oven!
Why did the calzone refuse to go to the party? It wasn’t ready to come out of its shell!
Why did the calzone bring a flashlight to the party? It wanted to see if there were any hot pockets around!
How did the calzone get a promotion? It really knew how to rise to the occasion.
Why did the calzone go to the gym? It wanted to get a little extra muscle in its fold!
Why did the calzone get a promotion? It had a lot of dough-cumented achievements!
What do you call a calzone that’s lost its way? A confused crust!
What did the calzone say to the pizza cutter? Stop cutting into our crusty relationship!
Why don’t calzones ever get into trouble? They always know how to keep things well-contained!
Why did the calzone take a vacation? It needed to relax and unroll for a bit.
Why did the calzone become a musician? It wanted to play the accordion!
Why do calzones make great comedians? They always deliver a good dough-livery!
Why did the calzone start taking yoga classes? It wanted to fold itself into shape.
Why did the calzone become an astronaut? It wanted to explore the outer crust of the universe!
Why did the calzone break up with the sandwich? It couldn’t handle the commitment of being enclosed all the time.
Why did the calzone become a comedian? Because it knew how to deliver the perfect “cheesy” punchline.
Why did the calzone go to therapy? It felt like it was getting too cheesy.

Calzone Jokes for Kids

Calzone jokes for kids are the delightful, stuffed pockets of the joke world—safe, delicious, and always a hit with the little comedians.

These jokes inspire children to have fun with language and understand the thrill of puns, nurturing a love for humor that’s as satisfying as the dish itself.

Plus, calzone jokes for kids have the extra advantage of making Italian cuisine exciting, turning that folded pizza on their plate into a source of giggles.

Ready for some cheesy humor?

Here are the jokes that’ll have them laughing over their lunch:

What did the calzone say to the hungry kid? Don’t worry, I’ll fold myself in your mouth!
How do calzones cut their hair? With pizza scissors!
Why did the calzone start a band? It wanted to be the main ingredient of a hit song!
What did the calzone say to the pizza cutter? Please be gentle, I’m feeling a bit stuffed!
Why was the calzone so good at math? It knew all the angles of pizza slices!
What did the calzone say to the slice of pizza? “You’re looking sharp today!”
Why did the calzone become a chef? It wanted to be the best dough-mestic cook!
What do you call a calzone that can dance? A maca-roni and cheese calzone!
What did the calzone say to the chef? Can you please fold me up in a warm hug?
What do you call a calzone with no cheese? A stromboli impostor!
Why did the calzone get a job as a detective? Because it wanted to uncover the secret ingredients!
Why did the calzone take up knitting? It wanted to make some warm pizza pockets!
Why did the calzone get a job at the bakery? It wanted to “roll” in the dough!
How did the calzone propose to the pizza? With a cheesy crust ring!
Why did the calzone go to school? Because it wanted to get stuffed with knowledge!
What did the calzone say to the pizza? You’re just not foldin’ up like me!
Why did the calzone take a nap? It needed to get some dough-mimic rest!
How does a calzone greet its friends? It gives them a cheesy hug!
Why did the calzone go to the doctor? It had too much dough-pression!
How do you know a calzone is happy? It’s fully folded and ready to be eaten!
What do you call a calzone with a lot of toppings? A stuffed crustacean!
Why was the calzone so good at telling jokes? It always had a cheesy punchline!
What do you call a calzone that’s really spicy? A jalapeño business!
What did the calzone say to the pizza? You’re a pizza garbage compared to me, I’m a calzone!
What’s a calzone’s favorite hobby? Playing hide and seek because it loves being stuffed inside!
Why did the calzone go to the library? Because it wanted to find some food for thought!
Why did the calzone bring a ladder to the restaurant? It wanted to reach new heights in deliciousness!
Why did the calzone join the circus? It wanted to be the greatest dough-ballerina!
Why did the calzone go to school? It wanted to get a little cheesy education!
Why did the calzone go to the party? It wanted to make everyone fold in laughter!
What did the calzone say to the chef? Can you please give me a little more sauce? I’m feeling a bit saucy today!
What did the calzone say to the pepperoni? You’re the topping of my dreams!
What did the calzone say to the pizza cutter? Be careful, you might give me a slice of life!
Why did the calzone visit the library? It wanted to check out some cheesy books!
Why did the calzone take up yoga? To become more flexible and foldable!
What did the calzone say when it won the lottery? I’m gonna take a dough-nation to all my fellow calzones!
Why did the calzone get a job as a pizza delivery driver? It wanted to make some dough!
What do you get when you cross a calzone with a computer? A laptop filled with cheesy goodness!
What did the calzone say to the chef? I’m ready to be folded and baked!
What did the calzone say to the pizza? I don’t want to be sliced, I want to be folded!
Why did the calzone run for president? Because it wanted to be the supreme ruler of the food world!
What did the calzone dress up as for Halloween? A pizza that’s about to be devoured!
What did the calzone say to the pizza? “You’re just a round piece of dough, but I’m a folded masterpiece!”
Why did the calzone win the race? It had a lot of fillings to fuel its speed!
What did one calzone say to the other calzone? “You’re the cheese to my dough!”
How do you make a calzone laugh? Poke it with a fork-ticle!
How do you make a calzone laugh? You give it a pizza your mind!
Why did the calzone take a nap? Because it was stuffed with so much goodness it needed a rest!
Why did the calzone bring an umbrella? In case there was a “pizza” rain!
Why did the calzone bring a flashlight to the party? Because it wanted to be the light of the calzone!
What did the calzone say when it won the cooking competition? “I’m the “folden” chef!”
Why did the calzone take a nap? It was feeling a bit stuffed!
What did the calzone say to the hungry kid? Fold me up and take a bite out of cheesy goodness!
What do you call a calzone that plays the guitar? A rockin’ roll!
What did the calzone say to the chef? “Fold me up, I’m ready to go!”
What do you get when you cross a calzone with a computer? A pizza that can crunch numbers!
Why did the calzone start a band? Because it wanted to be part of a crusty rock group!
Why did the calzone go to the gym? It wanted to get a good workout for its doughy physique!
What did one calzone say to the other at the party? Let’s get saucy and have a great time!
What do you call a calzone that loves to dance? A pepperoni toe-tapper!
What did the calzone say to the pizza delivery guy? Don’t forget to bring the extra cheese, I’m feeling cheesy today!
Why did the calzone get a job as a detective? It wanted to investigate the mystery of the missing cheese!
How does a calzone apologize? It says, “I’m really sorry, I didn’t mean to be so cheesy!”
Why did the calzone wear a hat? To keep its filling warm!
What do you get if you cross a calzone with a ghost? A pizza that can’t be seen!
Why did the calzone get a ticket? Because it was caught “rolling” through a stop sign!
Why was the calzone always so confident? Because it knew it had the perfect filling!
What did the calzone say to the hungry kid? Don’t worry, I’m stuffed with cheesy goodness!
What did the calzone say when it won the race? I folded it!
What do you call a calzone that’s been deep-fried? A crispy, cheesy delight!
Why did the calzone go to the doctor? It had a case of the saucy crust!
Why was the calzone so popular? Because it had a great filling!
Why did the calzone go to the gym? It wanted to have a strong crust and fillings!
What did the calzone say to the chef? You’re a-mozz-a-ing at making me so delicious!
What did the calzone say to the pepperoni? You’re a cut above the rest!
Why was the calzone always cold? It had too many cold cuts inside!
What did the calzone say to the pizza chef? Knead me alone, I’m stuffed!
What did the calzone say to the pizza? Fold me in half and let’s be cheesy together!
Why did the calzone take a nap? It was kneaded a break from all the rolling and folding!
How did the calzone feel when it got a compliment? It was filled with joy!
Why was the calzone shy? It couldn’t handle all the attention when it was fully stuffed!
How do you spot a happy calzone? It’s always smiling because it’s stuffed with joy!
What did the calzone say to the pepperoni? “You’re my favorite topping, you complete me!”
Why did the calzone blush? Because it saw the pizza sauce!
What did the calzone say to the breadsticks? Let’s roll together and have a cheesy time!
What did the calzone say to the hungry kid? I’m here to satisfy your pizza cravings!
How did the calzone win the race? It used its cheesy filling as a turbo boost!
Why did the calzone go to the doctor? Because it wasn’t feeling too saucy!
What did the calzone say to the pizza? You’ve got a lot of toppings, but I’m a real fold-er!
What do you call a calzone with a sunburn? A crispy crust!
How do you know if a calzone is happy? It’s got a big cheesy grin!

Calzone Jokes for Adults

Who says adults can’t have a hearty laugh over a calzone joke?

Calzone jokes for adults are more than just your average slice of humor.

They are a unique blend of wit, sophistication, and a sprinkle of sauciness, guaranteed to tickle your funny bone.

Just like a well-stuffed calzone, these jokes are bursting with amusing fillings of humor and intellect, seasoned with a hint of naughtiness that adults can appreciate.

Perfect for pizza parties, casual get-togethers or simply to spice up a mature conversation among friends, these calzone jokes will surely leave a savory and humorous taste in your mouth.

Here are some calzone jokes cooked to perfection for adults:

Why did the calzone get kicked out of the party? It couldn’t fold under pressure!
Why did the calzone refuse to go on a blind date? It didn’t want to be folded into an awkward situation!
Why did the calzone bring a parachute? It was afraid of a cheesy landing!
How did the calzone become a millionaire? It won the lottery dough-millions!
How did the calzone feel after a long day? Totally stuffed!
What did the calzone say to the plate of spaghetti? I’m just a little crusty, but you’re a real saucy dish!
Why was the calzone a great dancer? It had some serious dough moves!
What do you call a calzone that’s really good at math? A “pi”-zone genius!
Why did the calzone become an artist? It wanted to get a “slice” of the creative life!
What do you call a calzone that’s been to the gym? A muscle dough!
Why was the calzone always getting into trouble? It couldn’t keep its fillings to itself!
Why did the calzone join a circus? It wanted to showcase its “dough-batic” skills!
What do you get when you cross a calzone with a burrito? A folded feast of Italian-Mexican fusion!
Why did the calzone break up with the sandwich? It wanted someone who could handle its hot filling!
What did the calzone say to the chef? I knead you to fill me up with love and cheese!
What did the calzone say to the cheeseburger? You’re too beefy for me!
Why did the calzone become a lawyer? It loved wrapping up cases!
Why was the calzone a terrible dancer? It couldn’t find its rhythm in the dough!
What did the calzone say when it won the cooking competition? “I was on a roll and the judges couldn’t resist my perfect fold!”
What did the calzone say to the pepperoni? You’re my pizza’s one and only slice mate!
Why did the calzone become a detective? It always found a way to uncover the cheese!
What do you call a calzone that becomes a lawyer? A lawsuit-calzone!
Why did the calzone start a blog? It wanted to share its cheesy thoughts with the world!
Why did the calzone get arrested? It was caught stuffing itself with secrets!
Why did the calzone start a new business? It wanted to make some dough on the side!
What did the calzone say when it won the pizza competition? I’m just on a roll!
What did the calzone say to the hot oven? “I can handle the heat, I’m a “fold” pro!”
What did one calzone say to the other at the party? Let’s fold the dance floor with our cheesy moves!
Why did the calzone become an athlete? It loved the thrill of rolling in the dough.
Why was the calzone always the life of the party? It knew how to roll with the dough!
Why was the calzone always calm and collected? It knew how to keep its filling from getting stressed out!
Why did the calzone get arrested? It was caught smuggling extra cheese!
Why did the calzone start a band? It kneaded a doughs-a-cation!
Why was the calzone embarrassed at the party? It accidentally split its cheese filling all over the floor!
How do you make a calzone laugh? You tickle its crust!
Why did the calzone break up with its girlfriend? She couldn’t handle all the cheesy jokes!
Why did the calzone break up with the garlic bread? It found someone who could roll with the dough!
What’s a calzone’s favorite exercise? Rolling in the dough!
Why was the calzone feeling insecure? It was always being compared to its hot pocket friends!
What did the calzone say to the pizza? We’re just doughing our best!
Why did the calzone get an award? It was recognized as the best at folding under pressure!
What did the calzone say to the chef? Fold me like one of your Italian delicacies!
Why did the calzone go to the gym? It wanted to work on its dough-biceps and fold-pectoral muscles!
What did one calzone say to the other when it fell on the floor? “Don’t worry, we all have our crusty moments!”
What did the calzone say to the pizza? I’m just a folded version of you, but I’m more sophisticated!
Why don’t calzones ever get lonely? They’re always stuffed with love!
Why did the calzone become a comedian? It wanted to prove that folding can be hilarious!
Why did the calzone become an actor? It loved playing a role that was cheesy and delicious.
Why did the calzone get a job as a lawyer? It was always good at folding the case!
What did the calzone say to the mozzarella? “You complete me… and my cheesy filling!”
Why did the calzone go to therapy? It needed to work through its trust issues with pizza!
What did the calzone say to the pizza? “I’m just a fold away from being your better half!”
Why did the calzone go skydiving? It wanted to feel the “dough” in the air!
Why did the calzone become a detective? It loved to uncover delicious mysteries!
Why did the calzone break up with the sandwich? It said they were just “filling” in the gaps!
What did the calzone say to the oven? Can you handle this hotness?
Why did the calzone start a band? It wanted to be the lead singer, rolling in the dough!
Why did the calzone go to the gym? It wanted to get those perfect cheesy abs!
Why did the calzone become a musician? It loved jamming with all the different fillings!
Why did the calzone go to the gym? It needed to work out its dough muscles!
Why did the calzone refuse to go skydiving? It was afraid of getting folded in half mid-air!
Why did the calzone go to therapy? It had a lot of “folded” emotions!
Why did the calzone get a promotion? It always stayed stuffed with new ideas!
Why did the calzone open a bakery? It kneaded a new career!
What did the calzone say to the chef? “I’m a “fold” of your culinary skills!”
Why did the calzone get a speeding ticket? It couldn’t resist going over the limit!
Why did the calzone become a detective? It always knew how to uncover the hidden fillings!
What did the calzone say to the garlic knots? I’m a fold above you!
Why did the calzone refuse to join the gym? It didn’t want to get all worked up and end up folding!
Why did the calzone open a bakery? It wanted to rise to the occasion!
What did the calzone say when it won the pizza eating contest? I’m on a roll and I’m stuffed with success!
Why did the calzone join a gym? It wanted to tone its cheesy filling!
How does a calzone like its pizza toppings? On the inside, where it’s folded!
What did the calzone say to the oven? “I’m hot and ready, let’s get baking!”
Why did the calzone start its own business? It wanted to make a lot of dough!
Why did the calzone become a musician? It wanted to be part of a great dough trio!
What do you call a calzone that’s full of hot air? A politician!
Why don’t calzones ever get in trouble with the law? They always have a good “crust”-ody!
Why did the calzone join a support group? It was struggling with its identity crisis – is it a pizza or a turnover?
What did the calzone say to the pizza? You’ve got a lot of topping to do to catch up with me!
How did the calzone get in shape? It did a lot of folding exercises!
How do you know when a calzone is feeling sad? It’s feeling a little flat!
Why did the calzone always get invited to parties? It was always stuffed with good jokes!
What did the calzone say to the hot pocket? “I’m the original, you’re just a wannabe!”
What’s a calzone’s favorite mode of transportation? A “dough”-cycle!
Why did the calzone refuse to become a comedian? It didn’t want to be a “cheesy” joke!
Why did the calzone always win at poker? It was an expert at folding!
Why did the calzone bring a ladder to the pizza shop? It wanted to reach for the stars!
What do you call a calzone with an attitude? A sassy fold!
Why did the calzone get into a fight with the pizza? It was tired of being folded and wanted to be flat!
What did the calzone say to its friend? “Let’s be cheesy and spend the night in.” .
Why did the calzone go to therapy? It couldn’t handle the constant folding!
How does a calzone stay in shape? It exercises its dough-belly rolls!
What did the calzone say to the pizza? “You’ll never fold me, you cheesy imposter!”
Why did the calzone refuse to play cards with the pizza? It couldn’t handle the fold ’em strategy!
What’s the favorite song of a calzone? “Rollin’ in the Deep Dish!”
What do you call a calzone that sings? A high-pitched pocket of deliciousness!
Why did the calzone win an award? It had the perfect crust-entials!
How do calzones make phone calls? They use pizza dough-ialing!
Why did the calzone start a band? It wanted to be a pizza’s rock ‘n’ roll sidekick!
What did the calzone say to the pizza? “You can’t handle my dough!”
What do you call a calzone with a secret identity? A super-stuffed hero!
How does a calzone say hello? “What’s up, dough?”
Why was the calzone always late for work? It couldn’t find its way out of the oven!
Why did the calzone go to the therapist? It had an identity crisis, always being mistaken for a pizza!
What did the calzone say to the pizza? “Don’t be such a crusty friend!”
Why did the calzone become a stand-up comedian? It wanted to make people fold with laughter!
Why did the calzone become an actor? It loved playing cheesy roles!
What did the calzone say to the chef? “You gotta fold me right, or it’s a half-baked idea!”
Why did the calzone go to the comedy club? It wanted to get a good laugh from the audience!
What did the calzone say to the pizza cutter? “You’re really sharp, but I’m stuffed!”
Why did the calzone go to the art museum? It wanted to see the masterpiece of Italian cuisine!
Why did the calzone become a stand-up comedian? It had the perfect cheesy punchlines!
Why did the calzone get in trouble at school? It couldn’t keep its fillings to itself!
Why did the calzone break up with the sandwich? It needed more space to fold!
Why did the calzone get a job as a comedian? It loved to “fill” the room with laughter!
Why did the calzone go to therapy? It couldn’t fold its emotions properly!
Why was the calzone nervous about going to the party? It didn’t want to get stuffed in a corner!
What did the calzone say to the cheese? Let’s get saucy and fold together!
How did the calzone win the race? It always had an extra slice up its sleeve!
Why did the calzone join a gym? It wanted to get in shape before getting baked!
Why did the calzone become a detective? It loved solving dough-bious crimes!
Why did the calzone apply for a job as a detective? It wanted to solve the “mystery” of tasty fillings!
Why did the calzone go to the gym? It wanted to get in shape to fit more toppings!
Why did the calzone break up with the breadstick? It was tired of all the crusty jokes!
What did the calzone say to the pizza? You’re a good slice, but I’m a whole lotta dough!
Why did the calzone become an actor? It wanted to be in the “Rolls-Royce” of movies!
How do you make a calzone laugh? Give it some dough-lightful jokes!
What do you call a calzone that sings in a band? A dough-wop artist!
Why did the calzone run for mayor? It wanted to fill the doughvoid in the community!
What did the calzone say to the hungry person? Don’t worry, I’ll fill you up!
Why did the calzone start taking yoga classes? It wanted to master the art of “dough”ing it gracefully!

Calzone Joke Generator

Creating the ultimate calzone joke can sometimes feel like you’re just spinning dough in the air.

(Catch my drift?)

That’s where our FREE Calzone Joke Generator comes in to heat things up.

Crafted to mix witty wordplay, saucy humor, and pun-filled punchlines, it generates jokes that are sure to leave your audience stuffed with laughter.

Don’t let your humor go cold and stale.

Use our joke generator to create jokes that are as warm and inviting as your calzones.

FAQs About Calzone Jokes

Why are calzone jokes so popular?

Calzone jokes are popular because they blend the love for this Italian delicacy with humor.

They are particularly relatable for food lovers and those familiar with Italian cuisine, offering a fun and light-hearted way to express the passion for calzones.

Can calzone jokes help in social situations?

Definitely!

Sharing a joke, especially one based on a universally loved food item like calzone, is a sure-fire way to break the ice or bring a dash of humor to the conversation.

A well-timed calzone joke can lighten the atmosphere and bring a chuckle to almost any gathering.

How can I come up with my own calzone jokes?

Start by understanding the various attributes of calzones – their shape, their fillings, the way they’re often mistaken for pizza, etc.
Calzone has a unique vocabulary associated with it (e.g., dough, filling, oven-baked). Look for puns, homophones, or interesting phrases involving these words.
Consider the scenario or setting of your joke. Is it a cooking mishap? Or maybe a dining experience? Tailor your humor to match this context.
Try twisting a well-known saying or phrase to include calzone-related elements.
Embrace the puns and wordplay. Calzone jokes offer plenty of scope for linguistic creativity and pun-inspired humor.