544 Highway Jokes to Cruise Through a Long Journey

If you’re here, it means you’re ready to accelerate into the world of highway jokes.

Not just any jokes, but the fast lane of humor.

That’s why we’ve mapped out a list of the most hilarious highway jokes.

From road-trip gags to speedy one-liners, our compilation has a joke for every mile on the road.

So, let’s cruise into the high-speed lane of highway humor, one joke at a time.

Contents show

Highway Jokes

Highway jokes are a driving force when it comes to humor on the road.

They’re not just about the literal highways but also the experiences that come with road trips, daily commutes, and the occasional speed bumps we encounter on our journey through life.

Highways, with their constant movement, diverse travelers, and unexpected turns, offer endless comedic potential.

Creating the perfect highway joke involves clever wordplay, unexpected twists, and a dash of observational humor (think tailgaters, speed limits, or the mystery of disappearing lanes).

Ready to fast-track your way to laughter?

Buckle up and dive into these hilarious highway jokes:

What do you call a highway that’s scared? The nervousway!
Why did the highway get in trouble at school? It couldn’t keep its lanes straight!
Why did the car get a ticket? It was driving a little too high-way!
What did one highway say to the other highway? “I-see-you!”
What do you call a deer that’s afraid of crossing the highway? A road chicken!
What do you call a deer with no eyes trying to cross the highway? “No-eye-deer”!
Why did the chicken cross the road on the highway? To show the armadillo that it was possible!
Why did the traffic light turn red? Because it had to stop the chicken from crossing the highway.
Why did the highway go to the doctor? It had a splitting headache.
Why did the clown ride his unicycle on the highway? Because he wanted to balance out the traffic!
What do you call a highway that sings? An interstate-ional superstar!
Why did the chicken cross the road? To prove to the possum that it could be done without playing chicken on the highway.
Why did the scarecrow refuse to cross the highway? It heard it was a dangerous “thoroughfare”!
What do you call a highway with no cars on it? A road less traveled!
Why did the car bring a ladder to the highway? Because it heard the road had a lot of traffic!
Why was the highway so sad? Because everyone kept speeding by without even waving!
What do you call a frog that illegally crosses the highway? J-Walking!
Why did the computer go on the highway? To upgrade its software!
What do you call a chicken that crossed the highway without looking? Foolish fowl!
Why did the car bring a spoon to the highway? In case it got hungry and needed a fork in the road!
Why did the chicken cross the highway twice? To prove it wasn’t a chicken anymore, it was a roadrunner!
Why don’t bicycles stand up on their own? Because they’re two-tired!
Why did the rubber chicken cross the highway? She wanted to stretch her legs!
Why did the music band perform on the highway? Because they wanted to rock and roll all night and drive on the highway every day!
What’s a highway’s favorite song? “On the Road Again” by Willie Nelson!
Why did the car bring a sweater to the highway? Because it heard it was going to be a little drafty!
Why did the police officer bring a pencil to the highway? To draw the chalk outline of the chicken that crossed it!
What did the traffic light say to the car on the highway? Don’t look, I’m about to change!
Why don’t ants ever get in trouble on the highway? Because they have their own ant-elopes!
Why was the belt arrested? It was holding up a pair of pants!
What do you call a bear that breaks the speed limit on the highway? A total road hog!
Why don’t highways ever tell jokes? Because they’re always too busy cracking up!
Why did the traffic light turn red on the highway? You would be red too if you had to stop all that traffic!
Why did the squirrel bring a suitcase on the highway? It was going on a nutty vacation!
Why was the highway so tired? Because it had been running all day!
What do you call a highway that’s always dancing? A freeway-shuffle!
What do you call a highway that’s always late? The procrastin-road!
Why did the highway call for help? It was feeling a little bit run-down!
What do you get when you mix a highway and a snowstorm? A traffic jam!
Why did the ghosts avoid the highway? They didn’t want to be run over by a boo-ster!
Why did the math book look both ways before crossing the highway? It was studying for a geometry test!
Why did the highway go to therapy? It had too many high and low points!
Why did the cookie take the high road on the highway? Because it was feeling crumby!
What did the highway say to the car? “I’ve got you covered from start to finish!”
Why did the traffic light turn red? It wanted to bring the highway to a stand-still and have a little dance party!
Why did the computer go to the highway? To get some data traffic!
What did the highway say to the car? “Don’t look now, but I’ve got my eyes on you!”
Why did the computer go for a drive on the highway? Because it wanted to see the cyber-space.
Why do highways never make good comedians? Because their jokes always go over people’s heads!
Why did the bicycle refuse to ride on the highway? Because it didn’t want to tire itself out.
Why did the highway break up with the city? Because it felt like it was always being taken for a ride!
Why did the highway get a ticket? Because it wasn’t keeping up with the traffic signs!
Why did the highway take a nap? It was exhausted from carrying all that traffic.
Why don’t highway engineers ever get bored? They always have a road ahead!
What do you call a cow that’s driving on the highway? Beef Jerky!
Why did the car go to the highway’s party? Because it wanted to get a little “exhausted”!
Why did the cow go on a highway adventure? It was looking for the udder side!
What did the stop sign say to the car? “Stop! And don’t you dare drive through my intersection!”
Why was the highway so tired? It had been up all night with a flat tire.
Why did the zombie choose to walk on the highway? Because it was dead tired!
What do you call a group of musical highways? A jam band!
Why was the highway so good at basketball? It knew how to drive to the hoop!
What did the stop sign say to the car on the highway? “Stop loafing around!”
Why was the car so embarrassed? It couldn’t find its dipstick.
How do you make a tissue dance on the highway? Put a little boogie in it!
What did one highway say to the other? “I got all the traffic today, so you can have some tomorrow!”
What did one highway say to the other highway? “I can’t seem to get a good WiFi signal, I guess we’re just stuck in traffic!”
Why do highways make great comedians? Because they have lots of good traffic jokes!
Why did the car go to the beach? Because it wanted to feel the sand under its tires!
Why don’t eggs tell jokes? Because they might crack up!
Why did the skeleton go to the highway? To get some spare ribs!
Why don’t highways make good comedians? Because they always seem to miss the turnpike!
Why did the banana go to the car race? Because it heard it had a peel-ing atmosphere!
Why did the banana go to the doctor after driving on the highway? It wasn’t peeling well!
Why did the scarecrow become a traffic cop? He wanted to prove he could handle the highway!
Why did the chicken cross the road halfway? To lay it on the line.
Why did the scarecrow become a successful comedian? Because it knew how to keep the crows in stitches!
What did one highway say to the other? “I’ve got so many lanes, I can’t even count! How many do you have?”
Why don’t ants get sick? Because they have little anty-bodies!
Why did the traffic light turn red? Because it was embarrassed to see the highway showing off its moves!
Why did the highway feel lonely? Because it had no traffic to talk to!
Why did the highway go to the gym? It wanted to stay in shape for all the cars.
Why did the football team go to the highway? To get some long passes!
What did one highway say to the other highway? “I find your asphalt-itude quite refreshing!”
Why was the highway so good at math? Because it had a lot of street smarts.
What’s the best way to get a squirrel to stop on the highway? Play squirrelly music!
Why did the highway go to school? It wanted to learn all the road signs.
What did the highway say to the car? “I have a lot of lanes, but I’m really tired of your speeding.” .
Why did the scarecrow refuse to walk on the highway? It had no guts!
Why did the highway refuse to be friends with the side streets? Because they couldn’t handle its fast pace!
Why did the ghost choose to haunt the highway? It wanted to scare all the drivers out of their wits!
Why did the computer go to the highway? Because it wanted to meet its motherboard!
What do you call a duck that likes to drive? A quack driver!
Why did the banana go to the highway? Because it wanted to become a traffic jam!
Why did the traffic light turn red on the highway? It was embarrassed to see the cars stopped for a bathroom break!

Short Highway Jokes

Short highway jokes are like a fast drive on an open road – smooth, refreshing, and always full of unexpected turns.

These jokes are perfect for a quick chuckle during a road trip, an amusing status update, or to lighten up the mood in a traffic jam.

The charm of short highway jokes lies in their ability to merge the familiar with the absurd, leading to a sudden burst of laughter in just a few words.

So buckle up and prepare for a fun ride!

Here are some short highway jokes that deliver high-speed humor in just a few words.

Why was the highway always cold? It had too many freeze ways!
What do you call a highway that tells stories? An “express-way!”
What did the highway say to the driver? I’ll take you places!
Why don’t skeletons fight on the highway? They don’t have the guts!
What’s a highway’s favorite exercise? Running lanes!
Why did the highway get all the attention? It had traffic!
Why was the highway a great comedian? It had the best punchlines!
Why was the highway feeling confident? It knew all the road signs!
Why did the scarecrow become a traffic cop? It had hayway patrol!
What do you call fake spaghetti? An impasta!
Why did the highway go to the party? To dance the road-do!
Why don’t cows make good drivers? They always steer-clear of highways!
Why don’t highways make good comedians? They always take the wrong exit!
Why did the scarecrow take the highway? He needed some fresh air!
What did the highway say to the car? “Don’t road-rage on me!”
What do you call a road that sings? A highway to melody!
What’s a highway’s favorite type of music? Heavy traffic beats!

Highway Jokes One-Liners

Highway jokes one-liners are the epitome of humor summed up in just a few words.

They’re the verbal equivalent of driving on an open highway – fast, smooth, and incredibly thrilling.

Creating a good highway joke one-liner demands a fusion of ingenuity, accuracy, and an in-depth understanding of pun and satire.

The challenge lies in compressing the build-up and punchline into a brief format, delivering maximum laughter with minimal words.

Here’s hoping these highway one-liners get you cruising down the laughter lane:

I told the highway it was a good listener, but it just kept giving me the silent treatment.
Why did the computer go to the side of the highway? To download some bytes!
I took a wrong turn on the highway of life, and now my GPS keeps saying “recalculating.”
I always get mixed signals on the highway. The driver in front of me uses their turn signal, but then continues driving straight. It’s like they’re playing a game of blinker roulette.
I saw a sign on the highway that said, “Don’t drink and drive.” I thought, “Well, I guess I’ll have to find another way to get to work.” .
I’m pretty sure my car is haunted because every time I hit a bump, it starts playing the theme song from Ghostbusters.
I have a feeling that the highway to success is under construction because I keep hitting detours and roadblocks.
I’m friends with 25 letters of the alphabet. I don’t know why.
What do you call a highway that’s always tired? A sleepy way.
Why don’t chickens make good drivers? They always egg-celerate too quickly on the highway!
Why don’t highways trust trees? They’re always branching out!
I asked my GPS for directions on the highway, and it replied, “Sorry, I can’t drive you there, but I’ll provide moral support.”
I used to be a baker, but I couldn’t make enough dough, so I switched to highway robbery.
I tried to tell a joke about a highway, but it just went over everyone’s heads.
Why did the scarecrow take the highway? Because it heard it was full of corn-y jokes!
I tried to take the high road, but my GPS said it was under construction.
Driving on the highway is like being in a real-life version of Mario Kart, except the only power-up I get is finding a clean restroom.
Why did the tomato turn red? It saw the highway and realized it couldn’t ketchup!
I find it ironic that the only time I get cut off on the highway is when I’m actually following the speed limit.
What do you call a highway with no cars? A pedestrian pathway!
Why don’t highways ever get invited to parties? Because they always drive everyone away!
My car’s navigation system is so advanced, it can tell me exactly how lost I am.
Why was the highway so good at making decisions? It always took the right exit!
I asked the highway for directions, but it just said, “You’re on your own road now.” .
I asked the highway if it wanted to join my improv group, but it just kept going straight.
I drove past a hitchhiker on the highway holding a sign that said, “I’m not a psychopath, I just need a lift.” I thought, “Well, that’s good to know.”
Why did the highway go to the gym? To exercise its lanes, of course!
I tried to tell a joke about the highway, but I just couldn’t find the right lane to deliver it in.
You know it’s a busy highway when the traffic jam has its own Facebook page and Twitter account.
I accidentally drove past my exit, and now I’m on the highway to the danger zone… also known as the next exit.
I used to be a highway worker, but then I got tired of the road construction and decided to pave my own way in life.
I’m convinced that the highway’s speed limit signs are just suggestions for the fast and furious drivers.
I told the highway it was doing a great job, but it just replied, “I’m just paving my way.” .
I asked the highway how it was feeling and it said, “I’m just a road, I don’t have feelings.” I said, “That’s a very asphalt attitude.”
I don’t have road rage, I have “get out of my way before I show you the true meaning of rage” rage.
Why did the highway get a promotion? Because it was always paving the way for success!
Did you hear about the highway that ran away from home? It just couldn’t handle the traffic anymore!
I can’t tell if my car is slow or if everyone else is just in a rush to get nowhere.
What do you call a highway that sings? The Thoroughfare-ly Modern Millie!
What’s a highway’s favorite type of math? Times tables!
I’m on a whiskey diet. I’ve lost three days already.
I tried to parallel park on the highway, but it didn’t end well. Turns out, that’s not how it works.
Why did the highway get a promotion? Because it had a high traffic record!
What do you call a highway that’s feeling down? A low way.
Why did the skeleton refuse to cross the highway? He didn’t have the guts!
I’m on a highway to spell!
What did one highway say to the other? “I’ve got more lanes than you, but you’ve got a better view!”
I don’t trust stairs. They’re always up to something.
Why did the highway get a promotion? Because it always went the extra mile!
What’s the favorite game of highways? Traffic cone-go!
I tried driving on the highway, but it was just a road trip to nowhere.
Why did the traffic light turn red? You would too if you had to change in the middle of the highway all day!
What do you call a highway that sings? A road-io station!
I saw a sign on the highway that said, “Watch for children.” I thought, “That sounds like a fair trade.” .
I thought I saw a cop on the highway, but it turned out to be just a donut delivery truck.
Why did the scarecrow become a traffic cop? It wanted to stop highway robbery!
I accidentally took the wrong exit on the highway, and now my GPS is just saying, “Recalculating… forever.”
I asked the highway for directions, but it just said, “I’m always going in one direction.” No help at all!
Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!
What do you call a highway that gets a lot of speeding tickets? The Autobahn-ana Republic.
I’m not a control freak, I just like to lead the way on the highway.
Why did the traffic light go on a diet? It wanted to stay green and slim on the highway!
What do you call a sheep on a highway? A wooly roadblock!
Why did the car go to school? To get its tires educated on the highway!
Why did the highway become a comedian? It always had a good sense of asphalt!
Why did the highway get a promotion? Because it had an excellent drive!
Why was the highway embarrassed? Because it had too many cracks in its asphalt!
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman!
I was driving on the highway when I saw a sign that said, “Exit Only.” I thought, “Yeah, I think I’ll take a nap instead.” .
I tried to make a highway joke, but I lost my train of thought…or should I say, my car of thought?
Why did the highway break up with the street? It wanted more lanes.
I’m thinking of starting a highway-themed restaurant, but the food might be a little too fast for some people.
I saw a sign on the highway that said, “Don’t drink and drive.” I thought, “That’s a waste of perfectly good milk.”
Driving on the highway is like being in a marathon, except without the running part…or the cheering crowd…or the satisfaction of finishing.
I tried to have a conversation with the highway, but all it wanted to talk about was traffic.
My friend is a highway engineer. He always takes the road less traveled.
I couldn’t figure out how to fasten my seatbelt. Then it clicked.
Why did the scarecrow take a nap on the highway? He wanted to catch up on some zzz-crows!
My favorite thing about highways is that they have so many high points.
Why did the highway become a comedian? Because it had a lot of good material for stand-up!
I’m the one who always follows the speed limit…in my dreams.
I saw a car with a bumper sticker that said, “Honk if you love peace and quiet.” So I honked and then followed them for the next 10 miles.
My favorite type of road is a “taco bout it” – it’s a highway shaped like a taco!
My car and I have a love-hate relationship. It loves the highway, and I hate paying for gas.
Why did the highway become a doctor? It wanted to help fix traffic jams.
I asked the highway if it had any spare change, but it just gave me a toll booth instead.
I just saw a sign on the highway that said, “Road work ahead.” Yeah, I sure hope it does, otherwise why would they put up the sign?
What do you call a highway that sings? A carpool karaoke lane!
Why did the chicken cross the road? To show the raccoon how it’s done on the highway!
The highway is a great place to practice your singing skills, just make sure your windows are closed.
Driving on the highway is like a game of “dodge the potholes” with a side of “avoid eye contact with other drivers.”
I used to think road rage was something only other people experienced, until I met the highway during rush hour.
Why did the bicycle never take the highway? It couldn’t handle the pressure…or the cars…or the speed…or anything, really.
Driving on the highway is like being in a relationship, sometimes you just have to change lanes to avoid a crash.
I always give pedestrians the right of way…after they’ve crossed the entire continent.
The only time I like traffic is when I’m not in it.
Why did the bicycle take the highway? It wanted to meet up with its cycling buddies!
Why did the highway refuse to play cards? Because it was tired of dealing with all the traffic jams!
What did the highway say to the bike? “You wheelie need to slow down!”
I drove past a sign that said, “Don’t text and drive.” So I threw my phone out the window and kept driving.
I told the highway it was too tired, but it just shrugged and said it had miles to go.
I have a fear of speed bumps, but I’m slowly getting over it.
I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down!
I wish my car had a “take me to the nearest coffee shop” button instead of a “check engine” light.
I tried to write a song about the highway, but it just sounded like a bunch of traffic noise.
Why did the traffic light go to therapy? It had an emotional breakdown on the highway!
I got pulled over for speeding on the highway, but luckily I convinced the officer it was just my enthusiasm for the Fast and Furious franchise.
What did the highway say to the car? Road trip, anyone?
I tried taking the high road, but it was too steep for my car.
A highway engineer’s favorite dance move? The asphalt shuffle!
I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol.
I thought the highway was playing hide and seek, turns out it was just an exit strategy.
I used to think road construction was annoying, but now I see it as an opportunity to practice my patience…or road rage.
What did the highway say to the car? “I’m always here for you, just don’t take me for granted!”
I used to be afraid of speed bumps, but I slowly got over it.
I’m so bad at directions that even my GPS says, “In 300 feet, please pull over and let someone else drive.”
Why did the highway become an actor? It wanted to be the center of attention!
Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the highway and got embarrassed!
Why did the highway cross the road? To show the chicken who’s boss.
I just passed a sign that said, “Watch for children,” so I slowed down and turned off the creepy music.
I asked the highway what the secret to its success was, and it replied, “I just keep moving forward!”
I asked the highway if it had any good jokes, but it just said, “I’m always straight-faced.”
Why don’t we ever see any baby highways? Because they grow up too fast and turn into expressways!
I asked my GPS if it had any life advice, and it said, “Always take the scenic route.”
Why did the road say “Beware of the dog”? Because it had a mean shoulder!
I told my GPS I wanted to take the scenic route, but all it did was drive me in circles…literally.
Why was the highway embarrassed? It got caught in a traffic jam wearing its asphalt!
I tried to write a joke about a highway, but it didn’t go anywhere…
I used to think the highway was a dangerous place, but then I realized the real danger is the other drivers.
Why did the tree go to the highway? It wanted to branch out and explore new lanes!
What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus on the highway.
Why don’t highways make good comedians? Because they always have too many exits.
Did you hear about the highway that went on a diet? Now it’s a light road!
What do you call a deer with no eyes? No-eye-deer. And what do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs? Still no-eye-deer but on the highway!
My driving skills on the highway are so impressive, they should really hand out awards for honking in rhythm.
Why did the computer go for a drive on the highway? It needed to refresh its browser history.
What did the highway say to the car? “I’ve got a lot of mileage on me.”
I got a speeding ticket on the highway and the officer asked me, “Do you know why I pulled you over?” I replied, “Because you have a quota to meet?”
What did the highway say to the driver? “I’ve got you covered, just stay in my lane!”

Highway Dad Jokes

Highway dad jokes are the ideal mix of wit and comedy that can cause anyone to groan and giggle simultaneously.

They’re the type of jokes that are so corny, they’re actually funny.

These jokes are perfect for long car rides, family picnics, or simply to lighten up a dull day.

Buckle up for the laughs.

Here are some highway dad jokes that are guaranteed to entertain:

Why did the car go to therapy? Because it had too many roadblocks on the highway of life!
Why did the highway call the police? It had been taken for a ride by a street sign!
Why did the road get promoted? Because it had outstanding traffic performance!
Why did the road go to the doctor? It was feeling gravelly.
Why did the scarecrow take a job on the highway? Because he heard people were dying to see him!
Why did the highway feel lonely? Because everyone kept passing by without stopping to say hello.
Why did the clown refuse to drive on the highway? He didn’t want to deal with the traffic jokers!
Why was the highway always running late? It had too many traffic jams.
What do you call a group of musical vehicles traveling together on the highway? A car-avan!
Why did the highway become friends with the garden? Because they both love to grow traffic!
Why did the highway become a librarian? Because it had all the best road maps!
Why did the highway become a singer? Because it had the perfect pitch!
Why was the math book sad when it was left on the highway? Because it had too many problems!
Why do highways love listening to music? Because they can really jam out!
Why did the coffee file a police report on the highway? It got mugged!
What do you call a car that is tired of the highway? Exhausted!
Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants to the highway? In case he got a hole in one.
Why was the highway sad? Because it had too many curves and couldn’t find a straight path!
Why did the highway become a chef? It loved serving up hot lanes!
Why did the highway visit the doctor? It had a case of road rage!
Why did the highway go on a diet? Because it wanted to shed some excess traffic!
Why did the police officer go on a diet while working on the highway? To reduce traffic stops!
Why did the car go to the doctor? It was feeling exhausted from all those long highways!
What do you call a dog on the highway? Road Ruff.
Why did the cat sit on the highway? Because it wanted to play chicken with the cars!
Why was the highway always tired? Because it had too many sleepless lanes!
Why did the computer go to the highway? To see if it could crash there too!
What do you call a dinosaur driving recklessly on the highway? A tyrannosaurus wrecks!
Why did the highway go to the gym? It wanted to get some extra lanes!
Why did the scarecrow become a traffic cop? Because he was outstanding in his field of directing cars on the highway.
Why did the baker go to the highway? To get a roll on the road!
Why did the computer drive on the highway? Because it heard it had great bytes!
Why did the highway go to school? To get smarter and become a smartway!
Why did the car bring a blanket to the highway? In case it got tired and needed to take a street nap!
Why did the car go to therapy? Because it had too many highways and byways!
Why did the mathematician always choose the highway? Because it had the most sine-age!
Why did the math book look both ways before crossing the highway? It wanted to solve the equation for safety!
Why did the computer go to the highway? To surf the information superhighway!
What do you call it when cows take over a highway? A mooooo-tiny!
Why don’t highways ever have parties? Because they’re always too busy merging.
Why did the highway bring a ladder to the party? Because it wanted to raise the bar!
What do you call a highway with lots of cows? A mooooo-torway!
Why was the highway so tired? Because it’s always driving everyone crazy!
Why did the highway have a party? Because it was celebrating a milestone!
Why don’t cars tell jokes? Because they always drive on the straight and narrow.
Why don’t highways ever make good comedians? Because they always take things too literally!
Why did the car always carry a map on the highway? Because it wanted to take the scenic route!
Why did the road break up with the highway? It felt like it was always being driven on!
What did the highway say to the car? Are you ready for some traffic jam?
Why did the highway steal all the money? Because it needed some change!
Why did the scarecrow get promoted to a highway patrol officer? He was outstanding in his field!
Why was the highway always tired? Because it’s always going the extra mile!
Why did the bicycle get in trouble on the highway? Because it couldn’t handle the cycle path!
Why did the bicycle fall over on the highway? It couldn’t handle the traffic!
What do you call a deer that always obeys the highway speed limit? A law-abiding citizen!
What did the highway say to the car? “Don’t worry, I’ve got your back!” (asphalt).
Why did the motorcycle bring a ladder on the highway? Because it wanted to reach new heights!
Why don’t highways take vacations? Because they’re always on the road!
Why did the scarecrow take the highway? Because it heard it was a great place to catch a few crows!
Why did the car go to the doctor after driving on the highway? It had a traffic jam.
Why did the math book look both ways before crossing the highway? To make sure it didn’t get multiplied or divided!
What kind of car does an egg drive on the highway? A yolkswagen!
What did the highway say to the car? “I’ve got you covered!” because it was paved!
Why did the scarecrow take the highway? Because it heard it was the fastest route to corn-venience.
Why do highways never get invited to parties? Because they always cause too much traffic.
Why don’t highways ever get lonely? Because they always have plenty of traffic!
What do you call a highway that sings? An expressway to rock and roll!
What did the highway say to the other highway? “I feel like we’re going in different directions.”
What do you call a chicken crossing the highway without looking both ways? Poultry in motion!
Why did the traffic light turn red on the highway? Because it wanted to stop all the traffic and have a jam session!
What did the highway say when it was feeling down? I need a shoulder to cry on.
Why did the car bring a jumper cable to the highway? Because it heard the road needed a little pick-me-up!
What do you call a highway that’s full of sheep? A lamb-borghini!
Why don’t scientists trust atoms when they’re on the highway? Because they make up everything!
Why did the computer go to the side of the highway? To visit its motherboard!
Why don’t highways ever need therapy? Because they always get to expressway their feelings.
Why did the tomato turn green on the highway? It was unripe and not ready to ketchup with the other cars!

Highway Jokes for Kids

Highway jokes for kids are like the playful road signs of the humor world—simple, entertaining, and always a hit with the little travelers.

These jokes ignite a child’s imagination and understanding of the world around them, fostering an appreciation for humor that’s as exciting as a road trip itself.

Plus, highway jokes for kids have the added benefit of making long car journeys enjoyable, turning the miles of asphalt into a source of fun and laughter.

Ready to hit the humor highway?

Here are the jokes that’ll have them laughing all the way to the next rest stop:

Why did the car go to the dance? Because it wanted to do the freeway!
What did one highway say to the other? I’m not sure where I’m going either, let’s just merge!
Why did the road get an award? Because it was outstanding in its lane!
What kind of road makes you sleepy? A “snooze” highway!
Why did the car bring an umbrella on the highway? In case it rained traffic cones!
What do you call a sheep on a motorway? A traffic jam!
Why did the car’s tires go to school? To get a little more traction!
Why did the scarecrow take a job on the highway? Because he wanted to improve his straw-ma!
Why did the traffic light turn red? Because it was tired of people always running around!
What do you call a snowman with a car? Frosty the Snowmobile!
Why did the car bring a pencil and paper to the highway? Because it wanted to draw some road maps!
What do you call a highway that’s afraid of going uphill? A scared-a-way!
What do you call a highway with music? A road to jam on!
Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was “tired” of going uphill!
What do you call a highway that sings all the time? A “tuneful” road!
Why did the chicken go to the movie theater on the highway? It wanted to see a “peck”-ture show!
Why did the traffic light go on a vacation? It wanted to see some “green” scenery on the highway!
What did one highway say to the other highway? I’ll meet you at the intersection!
Why did the traffic light turn red? Because it was embarrassed to be seen changing in the middle of the highway!
What do you call a dog who loves to drive? A Pup-cab!
Why did the bicycle fall down on the highway? Because it was two-tired!
What kind of car is the favorite for superheroes? A super highway!
Why did the car go to the bakery on the highway? It needed a good roll!
What kind of car is always ready for a race? A fast car, of course!
What do you call a car that’s afraid to go on the highway? A scaredy-car!
Why did the tomato turn red when it saw the highway? Because it saw the “ketchup” ahead!
Why did the cow cross the highway? To get to the udder side!
What do you call a bear with no teeth on the highway? A gummy bear!
Why did the car’s engine get a ticket? Because it was running a little too hot!
What do you get if you cross a highway with a refrigerator? Very cold traffic!
Why did the road go to school? Because it wanted to improve its traffic flow!
What do you call a cat that crosses the road? A meow-safet!
Why did the car go to school? To get smarter because it wanted to be a road scholar!
How do you know the highway is tired? It’s yawning with its rest areas!
Why was the road cold? Because it was full of freezeways!
Why did the car’s engine go to the doctor? Because it had a little road congestion!
Why did the traffic light turn red? Because it was embarrassed to see all the cars stopping!
Why did the car go to the movies? It heard there was a high-speed chase scene!
Why did the car bring a pencil and paper to the highway? It wanted to take some notes on traffic patterns!
Why did the car bring a ladder to the highway? It wanted to reach the high speeds!
What do you get when you cross a highway with a refrigerator? Squashed tomatoes!
What do you call a car that’s been sleeping? A “parking car”!
Why did the road say hello to the car? It wanted to say “highway”!
Why did the banana go to the party? Because it was a-peeling!
Why did the car bring a map to the highway? Because it wanted to get a-road of any wrong turns!
What do you call a highway that’s full of fast food restaurants? An expressway to Burgerland!
Why did the computer go to the highway? To have a byte to eat!
Why do highways never get lost? Because they always have a lot of direction!
Why did the bicycle fall over? It was two-tired from being on the highway all day!
What kind of road has music? A “tollway”!
What do you call a highway that’s afraid of speed bumps? An “easy rider” road!
What do you call a chicken that crossed the highway twice? A double-crosser!
Why was the highway cold? Because so many tires gave it the “chills”!
Why did the car eat at the highway restaurant? Because it wanted to “fuel” up before the long drive!
Why did the car bring an umbrella on the highway? Because it heard there was “light traffic” ahead!
What’s a car’s favorite song? “Highway to Happiness”!
Why did the car bring a blanket to the highway? Because it wanted to cover the road with a picnic!
What do you call a sheep that drives a tractor on the highway? A wooly-mower!
What do you call a dinosaur who drives a truck? A Tire-Rex!
Why did the traffic light turn red on the highway? Because it was embarrassed by all the honking!
Why did the car bring an umbrella on the highway? In case it started to rain cats and bumpers!
What do you call a car’s favorite meal? A “drive-thru”!
Why was the broom on the highway? It wanted to sweep up the traffic!
What did one car say to the other car on the highway? I brake for fun jokes!
Why did the traffic cone get a promotion? Because it directed traffic so well on the highway!
What do you call a highway with no cars? A road trip to nowhere!
Why do trucks never stop at red lights? Because they’re always “tired” and need a break!
Why did the broom get a ticket on the highway? It didn’t have a valid sweeping license!
Why did the road get mad at the car? Because it didn’t give it a brake!
Why did the bicycle fall over when it crossed the highway? It was two-tired!
Why did the scarecrow become a crossing guard? Because it wanted to help the “corny” jokes cross the road!
What did the highway say to the car? “I have a lot of traffic, but it’s always a good road trip!”
Why did the car become a detective? Because it loved to solve highway mysteries!
What do you call a cat on the highway? Roadkill-9 lives!
Why did the car bring a map to the highway? Because it wanted to give the road a good read!
What did the big rig say to the little car? Beep beep, I’m a big truck!
Why did the chicken cross the playground? To get to the other slide!
Why did the car take a nap on the side of the highway? It was tired of running!
Why did the traffic light turn red? Because it saw the cars coming down the highway!
Why did the car visit the bank? It needed some spare change!
Why did the car’s engine go to the doctor? It was running a little “horse”!
What do you call a car that plays soccer? A goal-digger!
What do you get when you cross a highway with a joke? A traffic jam of laughter!
What do you call a road with a lot of puppies? A high “pupway”!
Why did the car get a ticket? It was parked on the highway shoulder!
Why did the car bring an umbrella on the highway? Because it heard there would be a shower later!
Why did the traffic light turn red? Because it was tired of being green all the time!
Why did the scarecrow bring a hat and sunglasses to the highway? It wanted to stay “cool” while watching the cars go by!
What do you call a car that tells jokes? A “pun”-tomobile!
Why did the car’s tires break up with each other? They just couldn’t seem to patch things up!

Highway Jokes for Adults

Who says adults can’t enjoy a good highway joke?

Highway jokes for adults take your humor on a fun-filled journey, merging clever wit with a hint of cheekiness.

Just like a long road trip, these jokes combine elements of humor, intellect, and a dash of mischief for an unforgettable chuckle.

These jokes are perfect for road trips, travel-themed parties, or simply to lighten up a serious conversation among friends.

Here are some highway jokes that are perfect for adults:

What do you call a sheep who can drive a car on the highway? A Lamborghini!
Why did the car get a job at the highway toll booth? It wanted to make some fast cash!
Why did the police officer go to the bakery on the highway? To get some donuts for a stakeout!
Why did the car bring a blanket on the highway? It wanted to sleep in the fast lane!
What did one car say to the other car on the highway? “If you keep tailgating me, I’ll report you for car-stalking!”
Why did the tomato turn red while driving on the highway? It saw the traffic jam ahead and got tomato-red with rage!
What did the highway say to the toll booth? “Don’t take me for granite, I’m a road worth paying for!”
Why did the traffic light on the highway turn red? It had too many stoplight beers the night before!
Why did the scarecrow refuse to cross the highway? It didn’t have the guts to face the traffic!
What did one highway say to the other? I feel like I’m going nowhere fast!
Why did the bee stay on the highway for hours? It was stuck in traffic with a hornet!
Why did the highway invite the bicycle to its party? It needed someone to pedal the dance floor!
Why did the highway get a ticket? It was caught speeding with all those lanes!
What did one highway say to the other? “I can’t wait to see you asphalt!” .
Why don’t highways trust backpacks? Because they carry way too much baggage!
What’s the difference between a road trip and a highway robbery? One involves stolen money, and the other involves stolen snacks!
Why did the highway refuse to be friends with the footpath? It couldn’t handle being walked all over!
Why did the highway become an artist? It wanted to express itself through “lane”scapes!
Why did the bicycle take the highway? It wanted to feel like a big wheel!
Why did the tomato turn red while crossing the highway? It saw the salad dressing on the other side!
Why did the highway get a speeding ticket? It was caught in a “high-speed chase” with a sports car!
Why did the scarecrow start a highway construction company? He wanted to make some “asphalt” of himself!
Why did the traffic signal switch to green on the highway? Because it wanted to give the cars the go-ahead to “lettuce” get on with their journey!
Why did the traffic light turn red on the highway? It wanted to stop all the cars from singing the wrong lyrics!
Why did the highway send a postcard to its friend? It wanted to let them know it was “traveling” in style!
Why did the highway refuse to become a stand-up comedian? Because it couldn’t handle all the traffic jokes!
Why was the highway a great place for a party? Because it had a lot of traffic cones!
Why did the ghost refuse to hitchhike on the highway? It didn’t have a ghost driver’s license!
Why did the bicycle take the highway instead of the bike path? It was tired of going in circles!
What did the highway say to the rest area? “I can’t wait to take a break with you!”
Why did the scarecrow take a highway job? He wanted to work in a fast lane!
What’s the best way to avoid traffic on the highway? Don’t leave the house!
What did the traffic light say to the highway? Don’t stop believing!
Why did the highway attend anger management classes? It had a tendency to get road rage!
Why did the highway refuse to apologize? It said it was always right, even when it was wrong-way!
Why don’t highways ever need therapy? Because they have good asphalt!
What did the stop sign say to the speeding car? “Don’t you dare run me over!”
Why did the car break up with the highway? It just couldn’t handle the constant traffic!
Why did the tomato turn red on the highway? It saw the road ahead was a ketchup bottle neck!
What did the traffic sign say to the car? “Don’t talk to me, I only do sign language on the highway!”
Why did the scarecrow start working on the highway? It wanted to get a little more “asphalt” in its life!
Why did the scarecrow take a job on the highway? He heard the cars were looking for some fast food!
What do you call a deer that’s crossed the highway without looking? A reckless road kill.
Why did the chicken refuse to cross the highway? It heard there was a poultry accident waiting to happen!
What do you call a highway that’s been working out? A muscle car-way!
Why did the car bring a map on the highway? Because it wanted to make sure it didn’t get lost in transmission!
Why don’t highways ever get invited to parties? Because they’re always too busy causing a “commotion”!
Why did the scarecrow get a job on the highway? It wanted to be outstanding in its field!
Why did the scarecrow become a crossing guard? Because he was outstanding in his field… or, rather, on the highway!
Why did the highway go to therapy? It had too many traffic issues to deal with!
Why did the tomato turn red on the highway? It saw the salad dressing and wanted to ketchup!
Why was the highway so tired? It had been carrying a lot of traffic!
What did the highway say to the car? “Are you ready to hit the road or are you just going to drive me crazy?”
Why did the highway break up with the ocean? They had too many roadblocks in their relationship!
Why did the police officer go to the highway movie theater? He heard it had good traffic!
Why did the truck driver sit on the clock on the highway? He wanted to be a time carrier!
What did the highway say to the car? Keep on truckin’!
Why did the highway refuse to go to the gym? It said running itself was enough exercise!
What did the asphalt say to the highway? I’m feeling so road-tastic today!
Why was the highway so sad? It had too many low points and too few high points!
Why did the highway get a promotion? Because it always had a great sense of direction!
Why did the clown drive a tiny car on the highway? So he could fit in the compact lane!
Why did the cowboy take his horse on the highway? Because he wanted to see how fast the horse could “hoof” it!
Why did the elephant bring a suitcase on the highway? It wanted to pack its “trunk” for the journey!
Why do highways never get tired of telling jokes? Because they always have a captive audience!
Why did the car get a speeding ticket? Because it took the highway to court!
What’s the difference between a highway and a path? One leads to adventure, and the other leads to a dead-end!
Why did the cyclist get a ticket on the highway? Because he couldn’t handle the bike-lane responsibly!
Why did the squirrel ride a skateboard on the highway? It wanted to go nuts with the speed!
What do you call a highway that’s afraid of commitment? A single-lane road!
Why did the ghost get pulled over on the highway? It was caught speeding through a booze zone!
Why did the bicycle refuse to ride on the highway? It didn’t want to get “tired” of the same old road!
Why did the scarecrow get a ticket on the highway? He wasn’t using his turn signals!
Why did the police officer get a ticket while driving on the highway? The speed limit sign was undercover!
Why did the math book get hit by a car on the highway? It had too many problems!
Why did the car go to the dentist on the highway? Because it had a bad case of “brake” breath!
Why did the squirrel bring a ladder to the highway? To reach the top of the traffic light and have a bird’s-eye view!
What did the highway say to the motorcycle? “I’ve got the road, you’ve got the speed!”
What do you call a man driving a car with no steering wheel, no seatbelt, and no windows? Dead!
Why did the scarecrow become a highway patrol officer? He wanted to catch the road kill.
Why did the scarecrow become a highway patrol officer? He heard it was a great way to stop traffic!
What did one pothole say to the other? “I’m feeling a bit down today, let’s go on a road trip together!”
Why did the road get promoted? It had excellent traffic flow and didn’t crack under pressure!
What did the highway say to the car? “You drive me crazy, but I can’t help falling for you!”
What do you call a highway that has a great sense of humor? A pun-way!
What do you call a highway with no traffic? A dream come true!
Why did the tomato turn red on the highway? Because it saw the traffic light change to yellow!
What did one highway say to the other? “I’ve got too many lanes, I need to go on a diet!”
Why did the bicycle fall over on the highway? It couldn’t find its balance sheet!
Why did the traffic light break up with the stop sign on the highway? It just couldn’t see eye to eye!
Why don’t highways trust drivers? Because they always try to take them for a ride!
Why did the highway feel lonely? It had too many “exit”ing friends!
Why did the snail get a ticket on the highway? It was too slow in the fast lane!
What did the road say to the highway? “Don’t you think we should merge and make a great connection?”
Why did the highway get depressed? It was always feeling left out of the road trips!
Why did the highway get arrested? It was caught speeding and couldn’t make a fast getaway!
Why did the highway call the police? It heard someone was using foul language on the road!
Why don’t highways ever get lonely? Because they always have a shoulder to lean on!
Why did the computer go to the highway? To find a better connection!
What do you call a pig that does karate on the highway? A pork chop!
Why did the truck driver join a band? He wanted to hit all the high notes on the highway!
Why did the highway get promoted? It was always on the right track!
Why did the turtle get a speeding ticket on the highway? It was racing with the hare-brained hare!
What did the highway say to the car? Don’t worry, I’ve got you covered, asphalt you need is a smooth ride!
What did the highway say to the car who cut it off? “You’ve got some nerve!”
Why was the highway jealous? Because it saw the driveway getting all the pavement action!
Why did the banana go to the car race on the highway? It wanted to learn how to “peel” out!
Why did the highway go to school? To improve its road-trip skills!
What do you call a highway that’s scared of commitment? A single lane!
Why did the pedestrian bring a ladder to the highway? To reach new heights in traffic jams!
Why was the highway tired? It’s always on the road!
Why did the smartphone get a speeding ticket on the highway? Because it was caught texting and driving!
Why did the road sign become a comedian? It wanted to make everyone on the highway laugh at its jokes!
Why did the road sign refuse to go on the highway? It said it had too many curves in its life already!
What did the highway say to the motorcycle? “I’m tired of your wheelie bad puns!”
Why did the scarecrow refuse to cross the highway? It heard the cars were always honking at him!
Why did the bicycle fall asleep on the highway? It was tired of spinning in circles!
What’s a highway’s favorite exercise? Road cycling!
Why did the highway take a nap? It needed some rest after all that traffic!
Why did the banana go to the side of the highway? It wanted to split!
Why did the highway visit the therapist? It was feeling run down!

Highway Joke Generator

Creating the ultimate highway joke can sometimes feel like you’re stuck in a traffic jam of humor.

(See the humor in that?)

That’s where our FREE Highway Joke Generator enters the fast lane to save your day.

Engineered to combine smart puns, smooth humor, and playful phrases, it creates jokes that are guaranteed to accelerate laughter.

Don’t let your humor come to a grinding halt.

Use our joke generator to drive jokes that are as fresh and exciting as a newly paved highway.

FAQs About Highway Jokes

Why are highway jokes so popular?

Highway jokes are a way to humorously express the shared experiences many have while traveling on highways.

They often involve elements like speed limits, traffic jams, and highway patrol, making them relatable to a wide audience.

Can highway jokes help in social situations?

Definitely!

Highway jokes can be a great conversation starter, especially when meeting new people.

They are an amusing way to vent common frustrations about highway driving or to reminisce about road trips.

How can I come up with my own highway jokes?

Consider common themes associated with highways such as traffic, speed, long drives, and road signs.
Think about funny situations or incidents that could happen on a highway.
Try using the double meanings of words related to highways for puns and wordplay.
Look for surprising or absurd twists that could take place in the context of a highway trip.
Experiment with well-known phrases or sayings, and adapt them to a highway setting.

Are there any tips for remembering highway jokes?

Think about the contexts in which you might use your highway jokes.

Perhaps when you’re on a road trip, stuck in traffic, or discussing your commute.

Associating jokes with these experiences can help you remember them.

How can I make my highway jokes better?

Practicing your jokes and getting feedback will help you refine your delivery.

Consider your timing and make sure the punchline isn’t too predictable.

Don’t be afraid to exaggerate scenarios or include absurd elements for comedic effect.

How does the Highway Joke Generator work?

Our Highway Joke Generator utilizes keywords related to highway and traffic scenarios to create funny and relatable jokes.

Simply input relevant keywords and press the Generate Jokes button.

You’ll soon have a collection of fresh, highway-themed jokes ready for your next social gathering.

Is the Highway Joke Generator free?

Yes, our Highway Joke Generator is totally free to use.

Generate as many jokes as you need to keep your conversations lively and full of laughter.

It’s the perfect tool for adding a dash of humor to your road trip tales.

Conclusion

Highway jokes are an amusing way to add a little zest to everyday conversations, making life a bit more enjoyable with each hearty chuckle.

From the quick and clever to the long and laugh-out-loud, there’s a highway joke for every occasion.

So next time you’re hitting the road, remember, there’s humor to be found in every mile marker, exit sign, and rest stop.

Keep spreading the laughs, and let the good times roll.

Because after all, a day without laughter is like a day without highways—unimaginable and, frankly, a bit less adventurous.

Happy joking, everyone!

Traffic Jokes That Will Keep You Busy During a Jam

Road Trip Jokes That Will Drive You to Laughter

Truck Driver Jokes to Keep You Trucking Along

Highway Patrol Jokes for Some Lawful Laughs

Speed Limit Jokes That Will Accelerate Your Laughter