528 Knights Jokes That Make Every Joust a Jest

If you’re here, it means you’re ready to charge into the realm of knights’ jokes.

Not just any jests, but the crown jewels of comedy.

That’s why we’ve forged a list of the most hilarious knights’ jokes.

From chivalrous chuckles to medieval mirth, our compilation has a quip for every encounter.

So, let’s embark on this gallant journey of knightly humor, one joke at a time.

Knights Jokes

The world of knights, chivalry, and medieval times provides a treasure trove of humor waiting to be discovered.

Knights jokes are not only about the gallant warriors in shining armor but also the intriguing culture and era they represent.

From the legendary tales of King Arthur and the Knights of the Round Table to the timeless fairy tales of damsels in distress, the landscape for these jokes is vast and compelling.

Perfecting a knights joke requires a playful manipulation of archaic language, understanding of medieval customs, and a bit of imagination to bring these bygone times into the present day humor.

Ready to embark on a humor-filled quest?

Unsheathe your laughter with these knights jokes:

  • Why did the knight refuse to fight the dragon? He didn’t want to be a damsel in distress!
  • What did the knight say when he was hit by an arrow? “Oh, I’ve been arrow-gantly attacked!”
  • Why did the knight bring a spoon to the jousting tournament? In case he needed to dish out some punishment!
  • What do you call a knight who likes to eat junk food? Sir Eats-a-Lot!
  • Why did the knight bring a horse to the comedy club? Because he wanted to try out his knight jokes!
  • How do knights party? They have a medieval dance-off!
  • Why did the knight always carry a map? Because he couldn’t find his way without his knight-vision!
  • What did the knight say to his squire when he forgot his sword? “I can’t believe I’ve misplaced my knight-stick!”
  • Why did the knight never succeed as a stand-up comedian? He always forgot his lance.
  • How did the knight know his armor fit perfectly? It was knight and day difference!
  • What did the knight say when he found out he was allergic to horses? “I guess I’m just a knight in sneezing armor!”
  • Why did the knight bring a pen and paper to the dragon’s lair? He wanted to take notes on how to slay the beast, just in case!
  • Why did the knight go to the dentist? He had a tooth that was causing a lance of pain.
  • Why do dragons sleep during the day? They can’t handle knights-shifts.
  • What do you call a knight with a sweet tooth? Sir Loin of Chocolate.
  • Why did the knight bring a teaspoon to the joust? He wanted to make sure he had a knight cap!
  • Why did the knight bring a pillow to the battlefield? So he could conquer his foes with comfort!
  • How do knights party? They go medieval on the dance floor!
  • How do knights greet each other? They say, “Sir-prise, Sir-prise!”
  • Why did the knight wear headphones while riding into battle? Because he wanted to listen to medieval rock music!
  • What is a knight’s favorite type of breakfast? Oat-armour.
  • Why was the knight always losing in chess? Because he was always trying to castle in real life!
  • What do you call a knight that loves to dance? Sir Prance-a-lot!
  • What did the knight say when he found a dragon in his castle? “How did you get in here without an invitation?”
  • Why did the knight always carry a towel? In case he encountered a jousting match!
  • How does a knight party? He dances until he drops armor!
  • What did the knight say when he found the Holy Grail? “I’m so chalice-tingly happy!”
  • Why do knights always carry a notebook? So they can jot down their knight-ions!
  • Why was the knight always so well-dressed? He had a knight out on the town!
  • What’s a knight’s favorite type of sandwich? A knuckle sandwich!
  • What kind of fish do knights catch? Swordfish!
  • Why did the knight bring a sword to the kitchen? To help chop the veggies for the knight’s stew.
  • Why do knights always carry a shield? To protect their knight-vision!
  • What did the dragon say to the knight after their battle? “You really “scales” at fighting!”
  • Why did the knight bring a pillow to the joust? In case he got sleepy during the knight fight!
  • Why don’t knights like to fight on rainy days? Because it dampens their spirits!
  • What do you call a knight who likes to flirt? Sir Lancelot Pick-Up-Line!
  • Why do knights always carry a notebook? To jot down their lance-to-knows.
  • Why do knights always carry a pen and paper? To draw their swords, of course!
  • Why did the knight always carry a map? So he could find his way to the castle… and avoid the drawbridge.
  • Why don’t knights like playing cards? Because they prefer to wear chain mail.
  • Why did the knight go to the dentist? He wanted to get his cavities filled with knight-rogen peroxide!
  • How did the knight feel when he lost his sword in battle? He was disarmed and really “cross”!
  • What do you call a knight who loves to fight in the rain? Sir Soaked-a-lot.
  • Why did the knight start a gardening business? Because he wanted to plant the seed of chivalry!
  • Why did the knight go to the art museum? He wanted to see the knights at the museum.
  • What’s a knight’s favorite type of clothing? Chain mail!
  • What did the knight say when he finished eating a meal? “That was knight-licious!”
  • What do you call a knight who likes to wear sandals? Sir Archimedes.
  • Why did the knight bring his phone to the castle? Because he wanted to take a “knight” selfie!
  • Why do knights always carry a map? So they never get lost in the dragon’s neighborhood!
  • What kind of jokes do knights tell? Sword of funny ones!
  • What do you call a knight who is always in a hurry? Sir Cumference!
  • What do you call a knight who puts their money in the stock market? Sir Plus!
  • Why did the knight bring a bar of soap to the jousting tournament? In case he needed to clean his lance!
  • What did the knight say when he found out his armor was too small? “It’s not a good fit, it’s too medieval!”
  • What did the knight say when he lost his armor? “Oh no, I’ve been disarmed!”
  • Why did the knight always carry a map? Because he didn’t want to get lost in battle and end up in Sir-cle!
  • How do knights greet each other? They say, “Armor you doing today?”
  • What’s a knight’s favorite type of exercise? Sword-y squats!
  • How do you know if a knight is tired? He’ll be medieval-ed.
  • What do you call a knight who likes to sleep all day? Sir Slumber-a-lot.
  • Why did the knight bring his sword to bed? Because he wanted to sleep like a knight!
  • What do you call a knight that skips armor training? Sir Cumvent.
  • What did one knight say to the other at the jousting tournament? “I’m ready to lance this competition!”
  • What do you call a knight who puts out fires? Sir Waterlot.
  • Why do knights always wear armor? Because it’s knightwear!
  • Why was the knight so good at math? He was always ready to count his enemies!
  • Why did the knight bring his phone to the tournament? He wanted to joust in case of emergency.
  • What’s a knight’s favorite kind of math? Sword problems!
  • Why did the knight refuse to play cards with the dragon? Because he was afraid of getting “burned” in a game of poker!
  • Why did the knight take up gardening? Because he wanted to sow some dragon plants!
  • How do you make a knight laugh? Tell him a joke that’s on the sword side.
  • What did the knight say when he found a dragon in his bathtub? “How do you fit in there, Sir Dragon?”
  • Why did the knight always carry a book with him? Because he wanted to be a knight-reader!
  • Why don’t knights like to fight other knights? Because every knight has their own suit of armor!
  • Why did the knight bring a piece of string to battle? He wanted to tie up loose ends!
  • Why did the knight bring a suitcase to the battle? He wanted to knight pack for his journey.
  • What do you call a knight who loves to fight with pillows? Sir Whack-a-Lot!
  • How do you make a knight laugh? Tell him a silly sword joke, it’s sure to lance his spirits!
  • Why did the knight get a job at the bakery? Because he heard they knead a knight shift!
  • Why did the knight always carry a piece of bread? In case he got hungry and wanted to have a knight bite!
  • What did the knight say to his squire? “I could really use a knightcap!”
  • Why did the knight get a new shield? Because his old one was medieval.
  • Why did the knight bring a frog to the castle? Because he wanted to joust-add some hop to the tournament!
  • What do you call a knight who puts his armor in the freezer? Sir Freeze-a-lot!
  • Why did the knight bring a pillow to the joust? In case he got tired and wanted to take a knight-nap!
  • What do you call a knight who is always falling asleep on his horse? Sir Napsalot!
  • Why did the knight always carry a spare suit of armor? In case he had a knightmare!
  • Why did the knight bring a spoon to the joust? In case he got knighted and wanted to eat with honor!
  • Why did the knight bring a spoon to battle? So he could savor the victory.
  • What did the knight say to his squire? “I can’t fight dragons right now, I’m feeling a little medieval!”
  • How do you know if a knight is scared? He’s shaking in his shining armor.

 

Short Knights Jokes

Short knights jokes are like a thrilling jousting match—quick, exciting, and always leaving you wanting more.

These jokes are perfect for text messages, social media posts, or for that moment at a medieval festival when you need to lighten the mood.

The charm of short knights jokes lies in their capability to blend historical humor with wit, delivering mirth in just a few words.

And now, by the power of Excalibur!

Here are short knights jokes that will bring a chivalrous chuckle in just a few words.

  • Why did the knight bring a horse to the party? For knightlife!
  • What kind of car does a knight drive? A Caterpillar!
  • What’s a knight’s favorite type of pizza? Deep-dish-knight!
  • Why did the knight bring a pillow to the tournament? For knighty-night!
  • Why don’t knights like to fight on sunny days? Too many knights!
  • How did the knight feel after winning the joust? Absolutely lance-tastic!
  • What kind of money do knights use? Excalibur-ency!
  • What do you call a knight who sleeps all day? Sir Lax-a-lot!
  • Why do knights always carry a sword? It’s a cutting-edge fashion statement!
  • What do you call a knight with a pet dragon? Sir Reptitious!
  • How did the knight propose to his girlfriend? With a sword-prise attack!
  • What’s a knight’s favorite exercise? Sword swallowing!
  • What’s a knight’s favorite type of car? A Jaguar-knight!
  • What do you call a knight who’s afraid to fight? Sir Rendered-Useless!
  • Why did the knight always carry a notebook? To take castle notes!
  • How did the knight fix his broken armor? With knight glue!
  • Why don’t knights like to fight on Sundays? They prefer knightlife!
  • What do you call a knight who’s always on time? Sir Cumference!
  • How do knights greet each other? With a sword-ial handshake!
  • What’s a knight’s favorite type of fish? A swordfish!
  • What do you call a knight’s favorite tree? The Round Table Oak!
  • Why was the knight always so happy? Because he had a knight-light!
  • Why did the knight get a promotion? He was a real Sir-vivor!
  • How does a knight like his coffee? In a suit of armor!
  • What’s a knight’s favorite kind of joke? A sword-able pun!
  • What do you call a knight that skips leg day? Sir No-Quads-A-Lot!
  • Why did the knight always carry an umbrella? In case of chain-mail!
  • How do knights greet each other? With medieval courtesy!
  • Why did the knight always carry a map? To navigate his knight-ventures!
  • What’s a knight’s favorite fruit? A swordberry!
  • Why do knights always carry a towel? To wipe off their armor!
  • How does a knight say hello? With a knightly wave!
  • What’s a knight’s favorite type of bread? Knighthaw! (Naan).
  • Why don’t knights ever fight on the weekends? They need some knightlife!
  • What’s a knight’s favorite song? “Knights in White Satin!”

 

Knights Jokes One-Liners

Knights jokes one-liners are a shining example of humor clad in the armor of wit, condensed into a single sentence.

They’re the spoken equivalent of a knight’s bold and swift strike in a duel – amusing, on point, and effortlessly charming.

Creating a captivating one-liner involves the artistry of humor, accuracy, and a deep understanding of the play of words.

The quest is to encapsulate the jest and punchline in a compact form, delivering a powerful comedic joust with just a handful of words.

Prepare for a jolly good jesting, as these knights one-liners are here to lead a charge of laughter:

  • Why did the knight use a calculator in battle? He wanted to multiply and conquer!
  • Why was the knight always cold? Because he was always wearing armor!
  • What’s a knight’s favorite type of cookie? Roundtable crackers.
  • What do you call a knight with a sunburn? Sir Roast-a-lot!
  • Why did the knight get a job at the bakery? He kneaded dough to fund his armor!
  • Why did the knight always carry a pen and paper? He didn’t want to forget his knight-ly duties!
  • What did the knight say to his horse when they arrived at the battle? “Hold your horses, we’re here to save the day!”
  • Why did the knight bring his phone to battle? He heard it had good knight vision.
  • I asked the knight if he had any friends, and he said, “Yeah, I hang out with Sir Cumference a lot.”
  • Why did the knight bring a pillow to battle? So he could have a knightcap if he got sleepy.
  • I asked the knight if he had any pet birds, and he said, “No, but I have a lot of sword-swallows!”
  • Why did the knight take a bath? Because he wanted to draw out the dirty!
  • Why did the knight bring a cell phone to the castle? He wanted to call it his “sword of communication”!
  • What did the knight say when he lost his sword? “I’m feeling a little sword-inary now.”
  • Why did the knight apply for a job at the bakery? He wanted to be a knight roll!
  • Why did the knight bring a map to the jousting tournament? He didn’t want to get knight-lost!
  • What do you call a knight that likes to skip the armory? Sir Cumvent!
  • Why did the knight refuse to fight on Mondays? He didn’t want to have a case of medieval Mondays.
  • How do knights like their eggs? They prefer them knightscrambled!
  • Why did the knight take up knitting? He wanted to create a chainmail-ler!
  • Why did the knight bring his phone to battle? He wanted to call for knight-reinforcements.
  • Why did the knight refuse to fight with a sword? He didn’t want to ruin his knightly manicure.
  • The knight’s favorite type of music? Medieval-of-pop, of course!
  • Why did the knight always carry a map? So he wouldn’t get lost on his quest… or his way to the grocery store.
  • Why did the knight refuse to fight with a spoon? He preferred a knight fork!
  • What is a knight’s favorite type of clothing? Chainmail-order fashion.
  • Why did the knight refuse to fight in the rain? He didn’t want to rust his armor-ial!
  • Why did the knight invest in a stable? He wanted a knight-mare market!
  • Why did the knight always carry a comb? He wanted to make sure his helmet hair was always in shining armor!
  • What did the knight say to his squire when he was feeling down? “Don’t worry, we’ll lance-ter your sadness.”
  • What did one knight say to the other knight while jousting? “I’m lance-iently waiting for you to fall off your horse.”
  • Why did the knight bring his pet frog to the battlefield? He wanted to show off his knight-croak.
  • I tried to become a knight, but I couldn’t handle the lance-itivity.
  • Why was the knight always cool? Because he was a fan of chivalry!
  • What did one knight say to the other when they were lost in the forest? “We’re in quite a knight-mare!” .
  • Why was the knight always aching? He had too many knight-mares!
  • How did the knight propose to his girlfriend? He knelt before her and said, “I’m your knight in shining armor!”
  • Why did the knight bring a dog to the castle? Because it was a knight’s best friend!
  • What did one knight say to the other when they were surrounded by enemies? “We’re in quite a bit of a pickle, Sir Cumference!”
  • What did one knight say to the other knight after a long day of jousting? “I’m so tired, I could sleep for a knight-ernity.”
  • Why did the knight start a bakery? Because he kneaded dough to become a knight of the oven!
  • Why did the knight always carry a notebook? He wanted to jot down his thoughts while they were still knightmares!
  • I asked the knight if he was a morning person, and he said, “No, I’m more of a knight owl.”
  • Why did the knight always carry a mirror? To reflect on his actions!
  • Why did the knight take a vacation? He needed some knightlife.
  • What do you get when you cross a knight and a vampire? A stake in shining armor!
  • Why did the knight go to the dentist? He wanted to get a tooth crowned!
  • What do you call a knight that always tells the truth? Sir-iously honest!
  • Why did the knight take a break from jousting? He wanted to lance a good book!
  • Why did the knight always win at poker? He had a royal flush… armor.
  • Why did the knight always carry a towel? In case he found himself in a joust situation!
  • Why did the knight bring a pillow to the jousting tournament? In case he fell off his horse and wanted to take a knight nap!
  • Why did the knight bring a ruler to the tournament? He wanted to measure up to his opponents!
  • Why did the knight bring a ladder to the battlefield? He wanted to take his fighting skills to new heights.
  • Why did the knight refuse to fight on a Thursday? He believed in “Swords-down Thursday” for peace and harmony!
  • What did the knight say to his squire before going into battle? “I’m a little sword, but I’ll be pointy!”
  • What did the knight say to his squire when he got a promotion? “I dub thee my knight-in-training-wheels!”
  • Why did the knight always carry a pen and paper? He wanted to be ready to joust down any notes!
  • What did the knight say when he found a dragon in his armor? “You’re really getting under my skin!”
  • Why did the knight refuse to fight on an empty stomach? He didn’t want to go into battle half-knighted.
  • Why was the knight always so calm during battle? He had excellent armor and nerves of steel!
  • Why did the knight always carry a bar of soap? He wanted to be a knight in shining armor!
  • Why don’t knights like to fight with their left hand? Because they always want to be right!
  • Why did the knight open a bakery? He wanted to make knight-meal muffins… with extra sword dough.
  • Why did the knight bring a picnic blanket to the jousting tournament? He wanted to have a knight in a picnic.
  • Why did the knight bring his golf clubs to the tournament? Because he wanted to get a knight under par!
  • Why was the knight never afraid of going into battle? He had nerves of steel-plate armor!
  • Why was the knight always the life of the party? He knew how to slay on the dance floor!
  • Why did the knight bring his own salt and pepper to the dinner feast? He wanted to season the knight’s tale!
  • Why did the knight always carry a map? He was afraid of getting lost in the knightosphere!
  • Why do knights always bring their swords to the dinner table? In case they have to knight someone on the spot!
  • Why did the knight always bring a lunchbox to battle? He heard it was a knightmare to find food on the battlefield!
  • Why did the knight carry a bird on his shoulder? Because it was his tweet armor!
  • Why did the knight bring a pillow to the battlefield? He wanted to take a knight-nap during a lull in the action!
  • Why was the knight always called “Sir Constant Complainer”? Because he was never “Sir Satisfied”!
  • What’s a knight’s favorite type of music? Medieval rock and chainmail!
  • The knight was so good at jousting that he could make a horse laugh… with his lance-able jokes, of course.
  • I told the knight to go to the gym because he needed some armor-flexing exercises.
  • Why did the knight bring a ladder to the joust? In case he wanted to reach the high notes on his horse’s harp!
  • What do you call a knight who loves to fight but can’t swim? Sir Vival!
  • What do you call a knight that skips the jousting tournament? A knight-lighter!
  • Why did the knight refuse to use email? He preferred to send messages by carrier pheasant.
  • Why did the knight open a bakery? He wanted to make rolls that were truly “knightly”!
  • Why did the knight bring a frying pan to the duel? He wanted to make his opponent a knight to remember!
  • What did the knight say to his squire? “I’m always ready to joustle and bustle!”
  • Why did the knight only eat at round tables? He didn’t like any sharp corners!
  • Why did the knight carry a dictionary into battle? In case he needed to define his opponent!
  • Why did the knight refuse to fight with a sword? He wanted to have a knight-out with his fists!
  • Why was the knight always broke? He kept spending all his money on shiny armor and horse shampoo.
  • What did the knight say when he found a dragon in his castle? “Excuse me, sir, you are in the wrong dungeon!”
  • Why did the knight wear a metal shirt? He wanted to become an iron man!
  • What do you call a knight who flies through the air? Sir Lofty!
  • Why did the knight bring a ladder to the joust? He wanted to be a high steaks champion.
  • I asked a knight if he enjoyed his job. He replied, “It has its ups and downs. Mostly downs.”
  • Why do knights always carry a map? In case they get lost in dragon territory!
  • Why don’t knights ever sweat? They have too many fans!
  • The knight was so dedicated that he even did push-ups on his armored knees, giving a whole new meaning to “knight squats.”
  • What do you call a knight who can’t joust properly? Sir Cumference, because he always goes in circles.
  • Why did the knight bring his smartphone to the joust? To knight-text his friends about his victory!

 

Knights Dad Jokes

Knights dad jokes are the embodiment of humor drawn from the medieval times and modern-day puns that will make you groan and chuckle simultaneously.

These are the kind of jokes that are so cheesy, they’re actually hilarious.

Knights dad jokes are perfect for renaissance fairs, costume parties, or simply to light up any conversation with a dose of humor.

Prepare for the onslaught of laughter.

Here are some knights dad jokes that are bound to tickle your funny bone:

  • Why did the knight bring a donut to the jousting tournament? In case he got hungry for a knight snack.
  • How do knights greet each other in the morning? “Knights” to meet you!
  • What did the knight say to his squire? “I can’t handle my lance without you!”
  • Why do knights always carry a notebook? So they can take note of all their knightmares!
  • How do knights like to say hello? They knight you with a gentle tap on the shoulder!
  • Why did the knight bring a spoon to the jousting match? In case he had to knight someone!
  • What do you get when you cross a knight with a zebra? Sir Stripes-a-lot!
  • What’s a knight’s favorite type of dog? A Great Danesel in distress!
  • How do knights party? They have medieval dances and joust a good time!
  • Why did the knight bring a mirror to the joust? So he could see himself in shining armor!
  • Why do knights always carry a shield? Because it’s a knight’s first line of defense!
  • What is a knight’s favorite kind of cereal? Ex-calibre!
  • Why did the knight always carry a pen and paper? So he could “knight” down all his thoughts!
  • Why did the knight always carry a notebook? Because he was lance-a-lot!
  • How do knights like their eggs cooked? Armor-let!
  • What did the knight say when he found a dragon in his castle? “Well, this is certainly a fire-breathing guest!”
  • Why did the knight bring a spoon to the sword fight? Because he wanted to have a knightcap!
  • Why did the knight bring his horse to the movie theater? Because he heard it was a knightmare on Elm Street.
  • What did the knight say to his squire? I can’t save the princess, I’m too armorous!
  • Why did the knight take his car to the blacksmith? Because it had too many horse-powers!
  • Why do knights always carry a sword? Because it’s their knight time!
  • Why did the knight bring a sword to the bakery? He wanted to slice some bread and butter up the competition!
  • What did one knight say to the other when they found treasure in the dungeon? “I dub thee rich!”
  • Why did the knight go to the dentist? Because he had a medieval toothache!
  • Why did the knight join a band? Because he wanted to be a Sir-guitarist!
  • Why did the knight only use cash? Because he didn’t want any money to be knighted!
  • Why did the knight take a nap during battle? He needed to recharge his knight-vision!
  • What did the knight say when he lost his sword? I must have knight checked it before leaving.
  • What did one knight say to the other while they were waiting for battle? “I’m getting restless, let’s joust do it!”
  • What’s a knight’s favorite type of footwear? Steel-toed boots!
  • Why did the knight sleep with a sword under his pillow? In case he had knightmares!
  • Why was the knight always on time? Because he never liked to joust around!
  • Why was the knight so good at chess? Because he was always ready to castle!
  • What did the knight say when he found his armor too tight? “I can’t breathe, I need a squire-cumference!”
  • Why did the knight bring his sword to the bakery? Because he wanted to cut the knight bread!
  • Why did the knight bring his phone to the tournament? He wanted to make sure he was always knight-connected!
  • What did the knight say after winning a tournament? “I’m a royal pain in the lance!”
  • What did the knight say when he was feeling down? I’m having a real sword-of-a-day!
  • How did the knight improve his sword skills? He always made sure to knightly practice!
  • How do knights send messages to each other? By using carrier falcons and medieval tweets!
  • What do you call a knight who likes to eat chocolate? Sir Cumference of the Dessert Table!
  • What kind of horse does a knight ride on? A chess horse!
  • Why did the knight always carry a pillow with him? He was always ready for a knight’s sleep!
  • How do knights get their suits of armor so shiny? They use medieval polish and knightly elbow grease!
  • Why did the knight start a bakery? Because he wanted to make “round tables” all day!
  • What did the knight say when he saw a castle with no doors? “Knock, knock! Who’s there?”
  • Why did the knight ride his horse to the grocery store? He needed to buy some galloping peas!
  • Why did the knight bring a pillow to battle? Because he wanted to rest his head on the battlefield!
  • Why was the knight always a hit at parties? He had a great suit of armor that was always shining!
  • How do knights like to eat their breakfast? In shining armor!
  • Why did the knight sleep with his armor on? Because he wanted to be on the knight shift!
  • Why don’t knights ever fight each other on sunny days? They prefer knightfall.
  • How did the knight feel after a long day of training? He was knighty tired!
  • Why did the knight go to the barber? He wanted a knight cut!
  • What did the princess say when the knight saved her? Thanks for saving my knight, you’re my shining armor!
  • Why did the knight bring a portable fan to the tournament? So he could stay cool under his helmet!
  • Why did the knight bring a ladder to the battlefield? Because he wanted to reach the highest level of chivalry!
  • How do knights get their suits of armor to shine? They use knightly polish!
  • Why don’t knights like to play cards? Because they’re always ready for a joust!
  • How do you know if a knight is a vegetarian? He’s the one who says ‘lettuce joust’!
  • Why did the knight bring a ladder to the medieval party? Because he heard the drinks were on the house!
  • Why do knights always carry a pen and paper? In case they have to draw their sword.
  • What do you call a knight who never takes a bath? Sir Stinks-a-Lot!
  • Why did the knight bring a spoon to the battle? To eat his enemies for dinner!
  • Why don’t knights like to fight on Sundays? Because it’s the knight before Monday!
  • Why did the knight go to art school? He wanted to improve his swordsmanship!
  • How do knights like their eggs in the morning? With their armor on!
  • What did the knight say to the king? I’m ready to take a knight off!
  • What did the knight say to his horse before a joust? “Hold your horses, we’ve got a knight to impress!”
  • What do you call a knight who wears perfume? Sir Fragrance!
  • Why did the knight bring a pillow to the joust? To give his opponents a knight’s sleep!
  • What did the knight say to his squire? Armor you ready for battle?
  • How do knights greet each other? They say “knight” instead of “good”!
  • Why did the knight bring a rope to the castle? Because he wanted to skip the moat and castle-gate!
  • What’s a knight’s favorite kind of footwear? Slay-sneakers!
  • What did the knight say when he found the holy grail? “This is my chalice to shine!”
  • Why did the knight go to the dentist? He had a terrible case of dragon breath!
  • How do you hire a knight? Just give him the keys to the castle and he’ll be on board!
  • Why did the knight wear headphones during the jousting tournament? So he could “knight” out the distractions!
  • Why was the knight always so calm? He had a lot of knightmares.
  • What’s a knight’s favorite type of math? Castleculus!
  • Why did the knight take his horse to the movies? Because he heard it was a stable film!
  • How did the knight feel after a long day of battles? Extremely sword!
  • What do you call a knight who loves to bake? Sir Prize-winning Pastry!
  • Why did the knight always bring a map to battle? So he wouldn’t get knight-errant!
  • Why did the knight always wear a metal suit? Because he couldn’t find a plate armor!
  • How do knights clean their armor? They use knight-ime!
  • Why don’t knights ever use cell phones? Because they prefer to use knight-vision instead!
  • What do you call a knight with a sense of humor? Sir Prize!
  • Why did the knight go to the dentist? Because he had a lot of plaque to remove from his armor!
  • How did the knight feel after winning the jousting competition? Absolutely spear-tacular!
  • What kind of weapon does a knight use when fighting allergies? A sneeze lance!
  • Why do knights always carry a map? Because they never want to lose their bearings in shining armor!
  • Why do knights always carry a whistle? So they can knight the wind!
  • How did the knight know his son was up to no good? He always found him “squiring” around!
  • Why did the knight bring a horse to the library? He wanted to check out some knightly tales!
  • Why was the knight always so calm? Because he knew how to keep his armor in check!

 

Knights Jokes for Kids

Knights jokes for kids are the shining armor of the joke world—safe, enchanting, and always a royal hit with the young ones.

These jokes help children explore history and fantasy in a playful and humorous way, encouraging a lifelong love of storytelling and comedy that’s as noble as the knights they’re about to discover.

Moreover, knights jokes for kids have the extra advantage of sparking interest in tales of bravery and chivalry, transforming the often overwhelming pages of history into a source of hilarity.

Ready for a joust of jests?

Here are the jokes that’ll have them laughing in their imaginary castles:

  • How does a knight start a conversation? He uses his knight-roduction!
  • Why do knights always carry a towel? In case they get in a jousting match!
  • What’s a knight’s favorite subject in school? Sword-ology!
  • How do you know if a knight is running late? He’s always dragging his armor!
  • What do you call a knight who makes pottery? Sir Mix-a-pot!
  • What do you get when you cross a knight and a frog? A hopper-armor!
  • What did the knight say when he finished his meal? “I’m stuffed to the armor!”
  • How does a knight communicate with his horse? He uses his knight mare!
  • What did the knight say when he finished his puzzle? It’s knight time!
  • What’s a knight’s favorite day of the week? Saturday Knight Fever!
  • What do you get if you cross a knight and a fish? A knightmare!
  • What do you get if you cross a knight with a dragon? A burnt suit of armor!
  • Why was the knight always polite? Because he knew that good manners were his sword and shield!
  • How do knights like their pancakes? Sir-cular!
  • What do you call a knight who always forgets his armor? Sir Rember-a-lot!
  • How does a knight greet his friends? He says, “Knight to see you!”
  • How does a knight send messages to his friends? By knight-mail!
  • Why did the knight start a gardening business? Because he wanted to grow his own suit of armor!
  • What did the knight say to the dragon? I’m so hot, I make fire look cool!
  • What did the knight say to his squire? “I’m going to joust about town!”
  • Why did the knight sleep with a sword under his pillow? To have sweet dreams!
  • What do you call a knight who always stays in shape? Sir Crunch-a-Lot!
  • How does a knight keep his armor shiny? With knight polish!
  • Why do knights always carry a map with them? So they can find their way around the knight’s table!
  • Why did the knight wear headphones during the battle? He wanted to listen to his favorite medieval tunes!
  • How did the knight feel when he got his armor? He was knight and shiny!
  • Why did the knight bring a horse to the mall? He wanted to go joust for shopping deals!
  • What do you call a knight who sings really well? Sir Lancelot of the Opera!
  • What did the knight say when he saw his armor? “Wow, it suits me knightly!”
  • Why did the knight carry a sword while fishing? Because he wanted to catch some swordfish!
  • What do you call a knight who sings really badly? Sir Ving!
  • Why did the knight get a ticket? He was caught jousting a little too fast!
  • What’s a knight’s favorite type of dance? The knightclub!
  • What did the knight say to the dragon? I don’t want to fight, I’m just here for the quest!
  • Why did the knight wear his armor to bed? Because he wanted sweet dreams, not knight mares!
  • What is a knight’s favorite kind of music? Medieval rock and roll!
  • What do you call a knight with no armor? Sir Cumference!
  • What did the knight say to the dragon? “I’ll fight fire with fire, but you breathe it!”
  • Why do knights always carry a towel? To wipe away the dragon’s tears!
  • What do you call a knight who is afraid of horses? Sir Trot-a-Lot!
  • What did the knight say to the dragon? “You’re fired!” (with a fire extinguisher).
  • What did the knight say to the princess? I’m falling for you, my lady!
  • Why did the knight go to the doctor? He had a sword throat!
  • Why did the knight stand on one leg? Because he wanted to see if his armor was made by Sir Plus!
  • How do knights like to eat their sandwiches? On a round table!
  • Why was the knight always so calm? Because nothing ever got under his armor!
  • How did the knight know it was going to rain? He saw a dark knight approaching!
  • What do you call a knight with a runny nose? Sir Sniff-a-lot!
  • Why don’t knights like to fight fire-breathing dragons? Because they can’t handle the heat!
  • Why did the knight bring a pencil and paper to the dragon’s cave? He wanted to draw out a plan of attack!
  • What’s a knight’s favorite kind of clothing? Chainmail!
  • How does a knight say hello? He waves!
  • What’s a knight’s favorite type of dog? A mastiff, because they are so loyal and brave!
  • How does a knight greet people? With knight-tennas!
  • Why was the knight always on time? Because he had a medieval watch!
  • Why was the knight always polite? Because he had impeccable knight-manners!
  • How do you catch a knight in a hurry? Use a quick lance!
  • Why do knights always fight on horseback? It’s too hard to joust while standing on a ladder!
  • What kind of underwear do knights wear? Armor-all!
  • How do you know when a knight is cold? He starts to shiver his armor!
  • What’s a knight’s favorite type of pet? A dragon!
  • Why did the knight bring a ladder to the castle? Because he heard the steaks were really high!
  • What’s a knight’s favorite type of race? A knight race!
  • Why did the knight go to school? To become the knight of the round ruler!
  • Why did the knight bring a ladder to the castle? Because he heard the food was on a higher level!
  • What’s a knight’s favorite kind of cereal? Roundtable Crunch!
  • What is a knight’s favorite part of a joke? The punch line!
  • How do knights like their sandwiches? With plenty of medieval!
  • Why did the knight go to school? To improve his knight-time reading skills!
  • Why did the knight go to school? He wanted to become a knight in shining armor!
  • How does a knight get around? On a horse-drawn carriage!
  • What do you call a knight who puts on too much armor? Sir Cumference!
  • What kind of shoes do knights wear? Armor-llies!
  • Why do knights always carry a sword? Because it’s too heavy to carry the whole castle!
  • What did the knight say when he found his horse missing? “Someone stole my stablemate!”
  • How do you know a knight is good at math? He can always count on his fingers!
  • Why did the knight bring his horse to the movie theater? Because he wanted to watch a knight’s tale!
  • What do you call a knight who sings all the time? Sir Chants-a-lot!
  • What’s a knight’s favorite kind of tea? Armor-mint!
  • How do knights say hello? They wave!
  • What did the knight say to his horse before they went into battle? “Let’s giddy-up and go save the day!”
  • Why was the knight always cold? He wore too much “armor”!
  • How did the knight feel after he won the tournament? He was ex-knight-ed!
  • Why did the knight bring a ladder to the castle? Because he wanted to reach the high notes in the medieval choir!
  • What kind of cereal do knights eat for breakfast? Sword-y Pebbles!
  • Why did the knight bring a toothbrush to the battlefield? Because he wanted to brush up on his fighting skills!

 

Knights Jokes for Adults

Who says chivalry and humor can’t go hand in hand?

Knights jokes for adults perfectly marry a medieval sense of adventure with a dose of sharp wit that only grown-ups can truly appreciate.

Much like a knight’s daring quest, these jokes intertwine elements of bravery, intelligence, and a sprinkle of naughtiness for an unforgettable chuckle.

These jests are ideal for dinner parties, Renaissance fairs, or simply for a fun twist during a mature gathering among comrades.

So, ready your swords, mount your steeds, and prepare for some knights jokes that are primed and ready for adults:

  • Why did the knight bring his pet frog to the tournament? He wanted to win the amphibious joust!
  • Why did the knight invest in a good suit of armor? He wanted to make a knightly impression!
  • Why did the knight refuse to fight on Mondays? He wanted to start the week off on a knight note!
  • Why did the knight always carry a pencil and paper into battle? In case he had to draw his sword!
  • Why did the knight go to the therapist? He was feeling a bit medieval!
  • Why don’t knights like to fight fire-breathing dragons? They prefer to keep their armor dragon-free!
  • Why did the knight refuse to fight on a Monday? He wanted to avoid the weekly “knight-mares”!
  • How do you make a knight laugh? Tickle his funny bone!
  • Why did the knight bring a pencil and paper to the jousting tournament? Because he wanted to draw his sword!
  • Why did the knight bring a ladder to the dragon’s lair? He wanted to be a step above the rest!
  • Why did the knight refuse to fight on Tuesdays? He thought it was a joust joke!
  • Why did the knight bring a helmet to the bakery? He wanted a roll with Sir Rises!
  • Why did the knight refuse to fight on horseback? He didn’t want to be accused of using performance-enhancing neighs!
  • Why did the knight bring his dog to the castle? He wanted to win the “knight’s best friend” competition!
  • Why do knights always carry a towel with them? In case they need to dry off after a knightmare!
  • Why did the knight bring a mop to the castle? He heard they needed a lance to clean!
  • Why did the knight bring his pet lizard to the jousting tournament? He wanted to show off his reptile ability!
  • What do you call a knight who skips armor day at the gym? Sir Flabby-lot!
  • Why do knights always carry a map? They don’t want to get lost in the Middle Ages!
  • Why did the knight refuse to fight on Sundays? He didn’t want to break his knight’s rest!
  • Why did the knight always bring his phone to the jousting tournament? He wanted to capture the knightlife on camera!
  • Why did the knight take up gardening? He wanted to make sure his lance-olias were always in bloom!
  • Why did the knight invest in a horse grooming business? He wanted to make some knightly profits!
  • What did the knight say when he lost his armor? “I have no body to go with my suit of armor!”
  • Why did the knight bring a pillow to the battlefield? He wanted to give the enemy a good knight’s sleep!
  • What do you call a knight who’s always late? Sir-Cumspect!
  • Why do knights always carry a notebook? They’re always jotting down their knightmares!
  • Why did the knight bring a pillow to the jousting tournament? He wanted to have a knight’s sleep before the battle!
  • Why do knights make great comedians? They always slay the audience with their jokes!
  • What do you call a knight with a carrot stuck in his armor? Sir Loin!
  • Why did the knight bring a ladder to the dragon’s lair? He heard the dragon had a high fire rate!
  • Why did the knight refuse to fight dragons? He didn’t want to cause any more medieval warming!
  • What’s a knight’s favorite game? Chess, because they get to be the king!
  • Why was the knight always successful in battle? He had the will to knight and the skill to fight!
  • Why did the knight always carry a notebook? He liked taking notes on how to slay dragons and rescue damsels in distress!
  • What did the knight say to the princess? “I don’t need a horse; I’m already a stud!”
  • What did the knight say when he found out he won the jousting competition? “I’m the knight in shining armor!”
  • Why did the knight become a barber? He wanted to give his enemies a close shave!
  • What did one knight say to the other when they both got stuck in heavy armor? I guess we’re in a real suit-uation!
  • Why did the knight never join a circus? Because he didn’t want to be known as a sword swallower!
  • Why did the knight bring his pet snake to the castle? Because he wanted to add a little hiss-tory to his armor!
  • What do you call a knight who loves to cook? Sir Loin, the Grill Knight!
  • Why did the knight refuse to fight with his friends? He didn’t want to harm any of his knights in shining armor!
  • How did the knight propose to his lady love? He went down on one knee and asked, “Will you be my noble steed?”
  • Why did the knight start a band? Because he wanted to play medieval music on his axe guitar!
  • What do you call a knight who likes to sing while fighting? A battle bard!
  • What did one knight say to the other while on a quest? “I’m so armor-ed with you!”
  • Why did the knight refuse to play cards with his friends? He didn’t want to deal with any knights of clubs!
  • What’s a knight’s favorite type of music? Heavy metal armor!
  • What did the knight say to the evil dragon? “You’re toast! Sir Roast-a-Lot is here!”
  • What do you call a knight who likes to play hide and seek? Sir Prize!
  • Why did the knight bring a ladder to the battle? He wanted to reach the top of the castle’s Yelp reviews!
  • Why was the knight always the life of the party? He knew how to break the ice with his sword!
  • Why did the knight carry a piece of string with him? So he could tie up any loose ends in his quests!
  • What do you call a knight who’s afraid of the dark? Sir Scares-a-lot!
  • What did the knight say to the castle? “I’m ready to defend you, but first I need to draw my sword!”
  • How does a knight keep his armor shiny? He uses knight-club soda!
  • What’s a knight’s favorite type of exercise? Medieval martial arts!
  • Why did the knight bring a sponge to the jousting tournament? To soak up the competition!
  • What did the knight say to his horse after winning a tournament? “We make quite the ‘knight’-ed duo!”
  • How do knights send messages? By knight mail!
  • Why did the knight go to the cooking class? He wanted to learn how to joust an omelette!
  • What did the knight say to the princess at the medieval dance? “May I have this sword dance?”
  • How do knights like their pizza? With one knightstand and extra sword-erings!
  • Why did the knight bring his own mattress to battle? He wanted to ensure a knight of good sleep!
  • What did the princess say to the knight when he asked her to marry him? “I’ll have to ‘knight’-er think about it!”
  • Why did the knight refuse to fight? He didn’t want to give his enemies any lance-ity of winning!
  • Why do knights always carry a towel? To wipe away the blood, sweat, and tears from a hard day of fighting!
  • What did one knight say to the other at the medieval party? “I feel armor-ous tonight!”
  • Why did the knight refuse to go on a diet? He didn’t want to lose his knightly figure!
  • What did the knight say when he won the jousting tournament? “I’m lance-lot of fun!”
  • How did the knight feel after a long day of fighting? Tired, but armored with determination!
  • Why did the knight always carry a compass? So he wouldn’t lose his bearings in battle!
  • Why did the knight bring a pen and paper to the castle? He wanted to ‘knight’-down his thoughts!
  • Why did the knight take up gardening? He wanted to grow his own suits of armor!
  • What’s a knight’s favorite piece of clothing? His chain mail, because it’s always in knight mode!
  • Why did the knight go to the dentist? He needed a knight guard for his teeth!
  • Why did the knight bring a ladder to the medieval tournament? He wanted to reach new heights in his jousting career!
  • Why did the knight refuse to eat the dragon’s leftovers? He wanted his own knight’s meal, not reheated breath!
  • Why did the knight take up gardening? He wanted to grow some armor-plated tomatoes!
  • Why did the knight bring a pillow to the battle? He wanted to give his enemies nightmares!
  • Why did the knight bring a broom to the battle? To sweep away the competition!
  • Why did the knight go to the comedy club? He wanted to slay the audience with his jokes!
  • Why did the knight bring a ladder to the battlefield? He heard the enemy had a towering sense of humor!
  • What’s a knight’s favorite dance move? The armor shuffle!
  • What did the knight say to his squire when he wanted to go home early? Squire, I’m drawin’ my sword and calling it a knight!
  • What did the knight say to the dragon before a battle? “I hope you’re fired up because this armor is fire-resistant!”
  • Why did the knight bring his sword to the restaurant? He wanted to cut a knightly figure!
  • What did the knight say when he finally found his armor? “Well, suit yourself!”
  • Why did the knight always carry a map? He wanted to make sure he was on the ‘right’ side of history!
  • What do you call a knight who likes to sing? A medieval minstrel!
  • Why did the knight start a baking business? He wanted to make lots of dough!
  • What’s a knight’s favorite instrument? The sword-cordion!
  • Why did the knight take up gardening? Because he wanted to plant his lance in the ground and grow a knightshade!
  • Why did the knight carry a flask of hot water to the battlefield? In case he needed to make a knightcap!
  • What do you call a knight who likes to play practical jokes? Sir-Pranks-a-Lot!
  • Why did the knight only use the stairs in his castle? Because he didn’t want to be accused of horseplay!
  • Why did the knight refuse to fight on horseback? He wanted to prove he could stand on his own two feet… or fall flat on his face!
  • What did the knight say when he won the jousting competition? “I guess you could say I lance-d it!”
  • Why was the knight always so confident in battle? Because he always wore armor made by Sir Prize!
  • Why did the knight go to the dentist? He had a sword tooth that needed pulling!
  • What did one knight say to the other when they were running late for battle? “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to knighterrupt you!”
  • Why was the knight always so good at puzzles? Because he loved to knight-solve them!
  • Why did the knight bring a spoon to the jousting tournament? He heard there would be a knight cap!
  • What do you call a knight that likes to chase cats? Sir Pounce-a-lot!
  • What’s a knight’s favorite type of bread? Sourdough! It goes perfectly with a sword fight!
  • What did the knight say when his squire asked if he had any spare change? Sorry, I only carry knight money!
  • Why did the knight bring his phone to the joust? He wanted to capture the knight-mare moments!
  • What kind of music do knights listen to? Medieval rock!
  • How did the knight propose to his girlfriend? He got down on one knee and said, “I’m a knight in shining armor, and you’re my fair maiden!”
  • What’s a knight’s favorite drink? Mocha-chino – it’s armor-azing!
  • Why did the knight carry a clock everywhere? He wanted to keep a knight watch!
  • Why did the knight bring a ladder to battle? He heard the odds were stacked against him!

 

Knights Joke Generator

Slaying the dragon of humorlessness can sometimes feel like a daunting quest.

(You see the jest there?)

That’s where our FREE Knights Joke Generator rushes in to rescue the day.

Crafted to joust with witty puns, chivalrous humor, and gallant phrases, it creates jokes that are guaranteed to storm the castle of laughter.

Don’t let your humor become as dull as a rusty sword.

Use our joke generator to forge jokes that are as sharp and captivating as a knight in shining armor.

 

FAQs About Knights Jokes

Why are knights jokes so popular?

Knights jokes are popular because they transport us back to medieval times with a humorous twist.

Their appeal comes from their clever wordplay involving chivalry, battles, and castles, making them timeless and enjoyable for all ages.

 

Can knights jokes help in social situations?

Definitely!

Knights jokes, with their charming wit and historical context, are excellent ice-breakers at parties or gatherings.

They can lighten up conversations and are a fun way to engage with people.

 

How can I come up with my own knights jokes?

  1. Get to know more about knights—their armor, weapons, code of honor, and their typical roles in medieval times.
  2. Use knight-related vocabulary as a starting point (e.g., sword, armor, chivalry, castle). Look for pun opportunities or surprising combinations of these words.
  3. Think about the situation for your joke. Is it a comic misadventure or a funny twist on a heroic tale? Adapt your humor accordingly.
  4. Try twisting a common phrase or saying to include knightly elements.
  5. Remember, puns and wordplay are key. Knights jokes are perfect for some pun-tastic humor!

 

Are there any tips for remembering knights jokes?

Consider associating knights jokes with related events or situations—like watching a medieval movie, reading a fantasy book, or attending a Renaissance fair.

These associations can help in recalling the jokes when the right moment comes.

 

How can I make my knights jokes better?

The charm of a knights joke lies in the unexpected.

Find common ground with your audience, surprise them with your punchline, and play around with knightly words.

Practice and experimentation are key, so keep sharing your jokes to see what gets the best laugh.

 

How does the Knights Joke Generator work?

Our Knights Joke Generator is a fun tool for quick humor.

Simply input relevant keywords for your knights-themed joke or situation and hit the Generate Jokes button.

In seconds, you’ll have a set of hilarious knights jokes ready to share.

 

Is the Knights Joke Generator free?

Yes, indeed.

The Knights Joke Generator is completely free.

Generate as many jokes as you want and fill your content with humor that’s as timeless as knights themselves.

Enjoy your comedic journey back to the Middle Ages!

 

Conclusion

Knights jokes are a gallant way to introduce a dash of chivalry into daily exchanges, making life a bit more delightful with each chuckle.

From the swift and clever to the lengthy and laughter-provoking, there’s a knights joke for every occasion.

So next time you’re delving into a tale of knights and chivalry, remember, there’s humor to be found in every castle, dragon, and duel.

Keep unsheathing the giggles, and let the good times joust and jest.

Because after all, a day without laughter is like a day without knights—unfathomable and, frankly, a bit less adventurous.

Happy joking, everyone!

Sword Jokes That Will Make You Sharp-Witted

Medieval Jokes That Will Send You Back in Time

Dragon Jokes for a Fire-Breathing Good Time

Castle Jokes That Will Make You Feel Like Royalty

Armor Jokes to Shield You from Boredom

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