889 Monday Hating Jokes That Make Even Garfield Chuckle

If you’re here, it means you’re ready to dive into the world of Monday hating jokes.

Not just any jokes, but the best of the bunch.

That’s why we’ve brewed up a list of the most hilarious Monday hating jokes.

From groggy puns to snooze-button one-liners, our compilation has a joke for every early morning grumble.

So, let’s plunge into the bitter coffee of Monday humor, one joke at a time.

Contents show

Monday Hating Jokes

Monday hating jokes possess a universal appeal that instantly resonates with almost everyone.

They bring an element of humour to the universally dreaded first day of the week and can lighten the mood in any room.

They’re not merely about the day itself, but the feeling and phenomenon associated with it.

From the classic weekend is over blues to the sudden onslaught of responsibilities, Mondays provide an unending source of material for comedy.

Constructing the perfect Monday hating joke involves playing with words, the element of surprise, and the often relatable struggle of transitioning from a relaxed weekend to a demanding workday.

Ready to turn your Monday frown upside down?

Brace yourself for laughter with these Monday hating jokes:

Why did the lamp despise Mondays? Because it preferred to stay in the dark and avoid the brightness of the new week!
What’s the difference between a Monday morning and a mosquito? One is a soul-sucking pest, and the other is an insect!
Why don’t Monday and Friday get along? Because they can never agree on the weekend plans!
What do you call a person who hates Mondays and is also a vampire? A creature of the night-shift!
Why did the pony hate Mondays? It was always a little horse!
How does a Monday morning express its hate? By hitting snooze repeatedly!
Why did the vampire hate Mondays? Because they suck the life out of him!
Why do we never trust atoms on Mondays? They tend to make up everything, including excuses!
Why did the broom go to therapy on Monday? It was sweeping the Monday blues away!
Why did the skeleton despise Mondays? Because it felt like being “bone-tired” all over again!
Why do Mondays exist? So that we can appreciate the other days of the week even more.
How do you make Monday feel better? Put it in the microwave until it’s Friday!
Why did the scarecrow hate Mondays? Because they were just another day to him, no brains involved!
What’s the best way to deal with Monday blues? Pretend it’s already Friday!
What’s a Monday’s favorite song? “I Will Survive… Until the Weekend!”
Why don’t Mondays like the beach? Because they always get tide down!
Why did the Monday cross the road? To prove it wasn’t chicken!
Why did Monday ask for a refund? It realized it didn’t come with a “Weekend Guarantee”!
Why was Monday always so grumpy? It couldn’t get over the hump!
Why did the scarecrow hate Mondays? Because they’re the worst days of his life, no brains required!
Why did the scarecrow hate Mondays? Because they’re the most dreaded “Crows-day” of the week!
What did Monday say to Friday? “See you in four days, sucker!”
Why did Monday break up with Tuesday? It couldn’t stand the “two’s” company!
Why did the chicken refuse to cross the road on Mondays? It already had enough “fowl” experiences for one week!
Why do Mondays feel so long? They’re a result of the conspiracy between the clock and the calendar!
Why did the computer hate Mondays? Because it couldn’t handle the “reboot” from the weekend.
Why did the golfer hate Mondays? Because they’re always teeing him off!
Why did the math teacher always hate Mondays? Because they just didn’t “add” up to a good start of the week!
Why did the scarecrow hate Mondays? It didn’t have the brains to appreciate the weekend!
Why did the math book look sad on Monday morning? Because it had too many problems!
Why do people hate Mondays? Because it’s the day that reminds us we have to adult for the rest of the week!
Why did the skeleton skip work on Mondays? It had no guts to face the week ahead.
Why do people hate Mondays? Because they can’t handle the weekend withdrawals.
What’s a vampire’s least favorite day of the week? Monday, because it’s a real pain in the neck!
Why did the scarecrow hate Mondays? Because they always left him feeling straw-ng and lifeless.
What do you call a Monday that feels like a Saturday? A miracle!
Why did the scarecrow hate Mondays? Because they’re always the straw that breaks the camel’s back!
Why did the calendar refuse to go to work on Monday? Because it heard there would be a lot of dates!
Why did the skeleton dread Mondays? Because they didn’t have the “guts” to face the week!
Why did the math book hate Mondays? It couldn’t solve any problems without coffee!
Why do Mondays feel so long? Because they’re a little Monday-strosity!
How does Monday feel about coffee? It’s absolutely grounds for a lawsuit!
Why did the skeleton hate Mondays? Because it’s hard to find the motivation to get up!
Why did the tomato turn red on Mondays? It realized it had to “ketchup” with the rest of the week!
Why did the coffee file a complaint about Mondays? Because it was tired of being a “mug”shot every week!
Why did the computer hate Mondays? It found them hard to reboot after the weekend!
What’s the difference between a Monday morning and a punch in the face? You can recover from a punch!
Why did the math book hate Mondays? Because it always felt like solving a difficult equation without any solution.
Why don’t Monday and Friday play cards together? Because Monday has a case of the “no weekends”!
Why did the bicycle fall over on Mondays? Because it was two-tired to stand up straight!
Why did the pencil have a bad attitude on Mondays? It couldn’t get its point across!
Why did the calendar want to avoid Mondays? Because it didn’t want to get caught up in another week of boring meetings and deadlines.
What did one Monday say to the other? “I’m tired of working, let’s start a union!”
Why do Mondays feel so long? Because they’re a start to a never-ending “week-wind”!
Why did the skeleton hate going to work on Mondays? He didn’t have the guts for it!
Why did the skeleton hate Mondays? Because he couldn’t find the funny bone to laugh at his own misery!
Why did the Monday morning rain cloud always feel grumpy? Because it couldn’t find its silver lining!
Why did the calendar file a police report on Mondays? Because it got assaulted by too many dates!
What did the calendar say to Monday? “You’re always the wrong day of the week!”
Why did the bicycle hate Mondays? Because it’s tired of getting stuck in a cycle!
Why did the teacher hate Mondays? Because they always spelled trouble!
Why did Monday go to the doctor? Because it felt weak and sickly!
Why did the skeleton hate Mondays? Because it couldn’t find the backbone to get out of bed!
Why did the calendar file a complaint against Mondays? Because they have too many “Mondates”!
Why did Monday call in sick to work? It caught a case of the “Monday blues.” .
Why did Monday break up with Tuesday? It said they had no chemistry!
What’s the difference between a Monday morning and a lion? One roars and the other bores!
Why did the coffee file a complaint about Mondays? Because it felt grounds for a terrible start to the week!
Why did the scarecrow hate Mondays? Because they always felt like a real “no-brainer”!
Why did the Monday cross the road? To remind you that the weekend is over and your misery has returned!
Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything, including Monday mornings.
What did one Monday say to the other Monday? “I hate myself.”
Why did the coffee complain about Mondays? Because it needed an extra shot of espresso to cope with the week’s beginning!
Why did the calendar file a complaint? Because Mondays were always trying to tear its pages!
Why did the scarecrow hate Mondays? Because they’re just the worst hay of the week!
Why did the tomato turn red every Monday? It was trying to ketchup with the rest of the week.
Why did the skeleton hate Mondays? Because they always got under his skin!
What did the hat say to the Monday morning alarm clock? “You’re so alarm-ing!”
Why don’t Mondays ever go to the gym? Because they have enough “dread” doing squats in people’s hearts.
Why did the calendar refuse to go to work on Monday? It wanted to have a date with the weekend!
Why did the scarecrow hate Mondays? Because they were always such a “bale” of trouble!
Why did the broom hate Mondays? Because it always had to sweep away the weekend dust!
Why did the calendar refuse to go to work on Monday? It heard it was a “Monday” and decided to take a day off!
Why did the calendar refuse to go to work on Mondays? Because it felt all the days were too close together.
Why did the calendar refuse to go to work on Monday? Because it already had a case of the Monday blues!
Why do Mondays never go to the gym? They’re always skipping a week!
What did the Monday say to the weekend? “I’ve got a case of the Mondays, can I join you?”
Why did the mirror hate Mondays? Because it couldn’t reflect on its own misery and wished to shatter the day away!
Why did the calendar refuse a date with Monday? Because it heard Mondays are a week long!
Why did the computer programmer despise Mondays? Because they always felt like a “debugging” nightmare!
What’s the difference between your favorite day and Monday? Your favorite day knows how to make you smile, unlike Monday.
Why don’t skeletons like Mondays? They feel like they’re just bone tired!
Why did the banana go to therapy every Monday? It was feeling a-peel-ing!
What did one Monday say to the other? I’m a-lousy day, but at least we’re in this together!
Why did the Monday cross the road? To get to the other side of the weekend!
Why did the scarecrow hate Mondays? Because they’re the busiest day in the field!
Why did the dog refuse to get out of bed on Mondays? Because they wanted to “paws” the day!
Why did the vampire hate Mondays? Because it couldn’t stay up late on Sunday nights.
Why did the scarecrow refuse to work on Mondays? It found the job too corny!
What do you call a grumpy Monday? Moan-day!
Why did the math book hate Mondays? Because they were full of “add”itude problems!
Why did the scarecrow hate Mondays? Because they’re the worst days to be outstanding in your field!
Why did the ocean hate Mondays? Because they always made it feel “blue” and salty!
Why did the musician hate Mondays? Because they always struck the wrong “chord” with him!
Why did the gym enthusiast hate Mondays? Because it felt like starting from “square one” every week!
What’s a Monday’s favorite exercise? Complain-yoga!
Why do Mondays feel like they last longer than other days? Because they’re a heavy dose of reality after a weekend of bliss!
What’s a Monday’s favorite game? Dodge the alarm clock!
Why do Mondays exist? To make us appreciate Fridays even more!
Why was Monday created? Because all the other days of the week needed a punching bag.
Why did the pencil dread Mondays? Because it’s pointless to start the week with a Monday!
What did Monday say to Friday? “I’m too far away from the weekend, can you lend me some days?”
Why did the calendar break up with Monday? Because it heard Tuesday was twice as nice!
Why did the computer programmer hate Mondays? Because it always started with a “byte” of trouble.
Why did the mummy hate Mondays? Because they always wrap up his weekends too quickly!
Why did the scarecrow hate Mondays? Because they were always filled with a bunch of corny jokes!
Why did the math book dislike Mondays? Because they were always too “problematic”!
What do you call a grumpy cat on Monday? A meow-ning person!
Why did the math teacher hate Mondays? Because it’s just another problem to solve!
Why did the tomato turn red every Monday? Because it saw the salad dressing!

Short Monday Hating Jokes

Short Monday hating jokes are like that first alarm sound in the morning—jarring, relatable, and a universal signal of the week’s start.

These jokes are perfect for sharing in a group chat, posting on your social media, or breaking the ice in a Monday morning meeting.

The beauty of short Monday hating jokes is their shared sentiment and wit, providing instant camaraderie and levity in just a few words.

So buckle up!

Here are some short Monday hating jokes to kick-start your week with a chuckle and a smirk.

What’s a Monday’s favorite TV show? “The Walking Deadlines”!
Why do Mondays always come at the worst time? It’s Murphy’s Law!
What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear.
Why don’t Mondays ever get the weekend off? They hate work!
What did Monday say to Friday? I’m not jealous, just tired!
Why did Monday always run out of money? It couldn’t stand working!
Why did Monday go to the bank? To get a little “change”!
What’s Monday’s favorite type of math? Subtracting weekends!
What’s a Monday’s favorite exercise? Running away from responsibilities!
What do you call a Monday that behaves? A rare sighting!
What’s a vampire’s favorite day to avoid? Mon-dread!
What’s Monday’s favorite hobby? Ruining everyone’s plans!
What’s Monday’s favorite song? “I Don’t Like Mondays” by The Boomtown Rats!
What’s a Monday’s favorite song? “I Don’t Wanna Work” by The Weekends!
Why did Monday quit its job? It couldn’t handle the Monday grind!
What did the Monday say to the weekend? I’ll see you never!
Why did the scarecrow hate Mondays? It didn’t have a brain!
What’s Monday’s favorite emoji? The frowning face, of course!
What did Monday say to Friday? “I hate being your opposite!”
Why did the calendar always dread Mondays? They were always day-zy!
What’s the only positive thing about Mondays? They make Tuesdays look better!
What did one Monday say to the other? Let’s ruin someone’s week!
What’s Monday’s favorite exercise? Complaining about how much it hates Mondays!
Why don’t elves like Mondays? Because they’re always goblin down their breakfast!
Why don’t Mondays like to play cards? They always prefer “sour-faced”!
What’s a Monday’s favorite song? “I Will Survive” by Gloria Gloomer!
What do you call a Monday that’s been canceled? A weak start!
What’s the best way to avoid Monday? Stay in bed until Tuesday.
Why do Mondays hate math? Because it involves adding to their misery!
Why did the scarecrow dislike Mondays? It preferred a day without work!
Why don’t Mondays like to work? They’re always a-dreading!
Why did the lamp dread Mondays? It couldn’t handle another bright idea!
Why did Monday hate work? It was a job-killer!
Why don’t scientists trust stairs? Because they’re always up to something.
What do you call someone who loves Mondays? Nonexistent!
What’s a Monday’s favorite dance move? The procrastination shuffle!
Why do Mondays hate math? Because it involves too many problems!
What’s Monday’s favorite kind of music? Bluesday!
What’s a Monday’s favorite type of music? Blues, of course!
Why did the calendar hate Monday? It’s just another Manic Monday!
Why are Mondays like a broken pencil? They have no point!
Why did Monday always feel lonely? Because everyone is Monday hating!
What’s a Monday’s favorite song? “I Don’t Want to Work” by Foreigner!
How do you make Mondays more bearable? Stay in bed till Tuesday!
What’s a Monday’s favorite game? Ruin everyone’s mood hide-and-seek!
Why did the lamp hate Mondays? Because it couldn’t “light”en up!
Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts!
What’s Monday’s favorite day? Far away!
Why did Monday dislike surprises? It preferred predictability and hating!
What’s a Monday’s favorite word? “Funday” – because it wishes it was!
Why don’t eggs tell jokes? They might crack up!
Why do Mondays feel so long? They’re a whole day’s work!
What do you call a Monday that never complains? A weekend!
Why don’t zombies like Mondays? Because they’re dead tired from the weekend!
What did Monday say to Friday? “I wish I could quit you.”
Why don’t skeletons hate Mondays? Every day is a bone-us!
Why did the scarecrow quit his job? He couldn’t handle Mondays!
Why did Monday ask for a raise? It wanted to work less!
What’s a Monday’s favorite song? “I Hate Mondays” by the Grumpy Cats!
Why did Monday break up with Tuesday? It found someone better, Fri-yay!
Why did Monday dislike coffee? It brought out its bitter side!
What did the calendar say to Monday? “You bring me down!”
Why do Mondays feel like they last forever? They’re mood hoovers!
What’s a Monday’s favorite movie genre? “Horror” – because it’s everyone else’s!
Why don’t vampires like Mondays? Because they’re a pain in the neck!
What do you call a Monday that’s not too bad? A miracle!
Why did the calendar go on strike? It couldn’t stand Mondays!
Why did Monday cross the road? To ruin your week, of course!
What did the Monday say to the weekend? I always follow you!
Why was Monday mad? It had the weekend to think about!
Why don’t Mondays ever get arrested? Because they never do anything!
What’s a Monday’s favorite thing to do? Hit the snooze button!
What do you call a Monday that’s feeling optimistic? A mirage!
What do you call a Monday that skips work? Unemployed!
Why don’t oysters donate to charity? Because they are shellfish!
Why do Mondays ruin diets? They’re the day of weak willpower!
Why don’t witches like Mondays? Because they’re always spell-bound by the weekend!
Why don’t Mondays ever go to the gym? They hate the workout!
Why don’t mummies like Mondays? Because they unravel under the pressure!
Why did Monday go to therapy? To work through its issues!

Monday Hating Jokes One-Liners

One-liner Monday hating jokes are the epitome of humor packed into a brief, succinct sentence.

They’re the verbal embodiment of that groan you let out when your alarm sounds on Monday morning – grudging, inevitable, yet filled with a strange sense of comical relief.

Crafting a great Monday hating one-liner necessitates a mix of wit, timing, and a profound understanding of everyone’s collective dread for the start of the week.

The real test is to capture the premise and the punchline in a concise manner, providing the most laughter in the fewest words.

We hope these Monday hating one-liners kick-start your week with an unexpected chuckle:

Monday is the perfect day for a mental health day. Or a sick day. Or better yet, a permanent vacation.
I don’t hate Mondays, I just strongly dislike them… 52 times a year.
Monday: the only day of the week that requires a restraining order.
Monday is proof that evil exists in the world.
Mondays were invented to make sure we appreciate Fridays.
Monday: The villain that ruins every Sunday night superhero movie marathon.
Monday is the reason why I drink.
Monday: the day when coffee needs a coffee to get through the day.
Mondays are so bad that even Garfield hates them.
I tried hating Mondays, but they kept coming back every week.
The only thing that keeps me going on Mondays is the thought of Friday being just four days away.
If Monday had a personality, it would be a mix of a black hole and a raincloud.
I tried hating Mondays, but they just don’t appreciate my dedication.
Mondays are the only day of the week that requires a permission slip from my bed to leave.
Monday is the Voldemort of weekdays.
I have a love-hate relationship with Mondays… I hate them, and they hate me back.
Monday called. It wants to break up with you.
Mondays should come with a warning label: “Caution: This day may cause extreme grumpiness and an uncontrollable desire to crawl back into bed.”
Monday is like a math problem. Add a cup of coffee, subtract your motivation, and divide your energy.
Mondays are like a bad ex, they just keep coming back to ruin your life.
Dear Monday, can we reschedule our meeting for never? Thanks.
Monday is just a cruel reminder that the weekend is nothing but a distant memory.
Mondays are like math problems, you try to solve them but they keep multiplying.
If Mondays had a theme song, it would be the sound of nails on a chalkboard.
Why is Monday so far from Friday, but Friday so close to Monday?
Monday: the day that makes you question your life choices… and your alarm clock.
My alarm clock and Mondays are in a competition to see who can ruin my day faster.
Monday is like a math problem. Add in some coffee, subtract motivation, and divide my energy by zero.
Monday mornings are the only time I wish I had a time machine, just to fast-forward to the weekend.
Monday: The day when your alarm clock becomes your least favorite song.
Dear Monday, can you please stop showing up uninvited every week? Sincerely, Everyone.
Monday is the day where even my coffee needs a coffee.
I hate Mondays as much as I hate running out of coffee in the morning.
I don’t hate Mondays, I just strongly dislike them with a burning passion.
Monday is the reason why I drink enough coffee to drown a small village.
Mondays are the reason why coffee was invented.
I don’t hate Mondays, I just strongly believe they should be optional.
Monday: the day when even my alarm clock hits the snooze button.
Mondays are like a bad haircut; you just want to wear a hat and hide the shame.
On Mondays, I wish I could Ctrl+Alt+Delete the entire day.
I’m not saying I hate Mondays, but if Monday was a person, I would definitely avoid them at parties.
Monday: the day we regret all the life choices we made on Sunday night.
Monday is a cruel reminder that the weekend is over and there are still four more cruel reminders to come.
I’m not saying I hate Mondays, but if Monday were a person, I’d punch it in the face.
Monday is the reason I drink so much coffee, and coffee is the reason I hate Mondays.
The only good thing about Monday is that it’s a constant reminder that the weekend is overrated.
If Mondays were shoes, they’d be Crocs.
Monday mornings should be illegal, like stealing someone’s last slice of pizza.
I don’t hate Mondays, I just strongly prefer every other day of the week.
I’m not saying I hate Mondays, but they are definitely on my list of least favorite things, right after spiders and taxes.
Monday is like a math problem: add in the coffee, subtract the motivation, divide the energy, and hope it all equals survival.
Mondays are proof that even calendars hate us.
I don’t hate Mondays, I just strongly prefer Fridays…and Saturdays…and Sundays…
I’m not saying I hate Mondays, but if Monday was a person, I would hide their toothbrush.
Dear Monday, I think we should break up. I’m seeing Tuesday and dreaming about Friday.
Monday is the reason why coffee was invented.
Monday is nature’s way of telling you that no good deed goes unpunished.
Monday should be optional, like avocado on a burger.
Monday: the only day of the week that makes you miss Sunday.
I don’t hate Mondays. I just really enjoy complaining about them.
Monday is the villain in the story of my life.
If Mondays were shoes, they would definitely be Crocs.
Wishing it was Sunday is a sure sign that you’re suffering from a severe case of Mondayitis.
I hate Mondays so much that I’ve considered starting a petition to remove them from the calendar.
Monday is the adult version of the monster under your bed.
Whoever named it Monday must have had a really bad case of the Mondays.
If Mondays were a person, they would be the kind that steals your lunch from the office fridge.
Monday mornings are like a math problem. Add in the annoyance, subtract the motivation, divide the happiness, and multiply the grumpiness.
I don’t hate Mondays, I’m just on a long-term relationship with Friday and we’re in a complicated situation.
My Monday morning alarm clock is the sound of my soul dying a little bit.
Mondays are the only day that can make a microwave minute feel like an hour.
Monday mornings are like a bad hair day for the soul.
The only thing worse than Monday is Tuesday, but it’s still not Friday.
Monday is just a reminder that the weekend is over, and there are at least 4 more days of misery ahead.
If Mondays were shoes, they would be Crocs – uncomfortable, ugly, and universally despised.
I’m not saying I hate Monday, but if it were a person, I would politely ask it to leave the room.
Mondays are like the snooze button of life – just when you think you’ve escaped, they come back to haunt you.
Monday is like a math problem, you can’t solve it and it makes you cry.
I don’t mind going to work. It’s the waking up and getting ready part that I hate on Mondays.
Monday should be optional, like the snooze button on my alarm clock.
I’m sorry, but I can’t Monday today, please try again tomorrow.
If Monday had a face, I would definitely punch it… repeatedly.
If Mondays had a face, I would punch it in the snooze button.
Monday is a cruel reminder that the weekend is officially over and we must return to our soul-sucking jobs.
Monday: the only day of the week that you need a motivational quote just to get through it.
Monday should be optional, like Netflix autoplay.
Monday is a great reminder that nothing good ever happens until you’ve had at least three cups of coffee.
Dear Monday, I think we should see other days of the week. It’s not me, it’s definitely you.
I’m not a morning person, especially on Mondays. If I had a spirit animal, it would be a sloth wearing a “Do Not Disturb” sign.
I hate Mondays so much that I’m considering inventing a time machine just to skip them.
Monday: The day when sleep feels like a distant cousin you’ll never see again.
Mondays are like bad hair days, but for the soul.
I’m not saying I hate Mondays, but they definitely make me appreciate Fridays more.
Dear Monday, please stop showing up every week. I don’t like you, and I’m pretty sure you don’t like me either.
The only thing worse than Monday mornings is realizing it’s only Monday morning.
Is it Monday again? I swear it was just Friday five minutes ago.
Monday is the evil mastermind behind the phrase “I don’t get paid enough for this.”
Mondays are like a bad haircut – you just want them to be over as quickly as possible.
I don’t mind Mondays, but they always seem to mind me.
Monday is the rude alarm clock of the week.
Monday morning: the time when dreams go to die and coffee becomes my best friend.
Monday is just a reminder that the weekend is over and there are five long days until it’s back again.
If Monday had a personality, it would be the kind that steals your lunch from the office fridge.
Mondays are like mosquitoes, they always manage to suck the joy out of life.
Monday: The only day where even the calendar says WTF!
Monday: The only day that takes longer to pass than a tortoise running a marathon.
Monday mornings are like a horror movie sequel, you think it’s over, but it just keeps coming back.
Monday is the day I hit the snooze button like it owes me money.
If Monday had a face, I would punch it. And then have a second cup of coffee.
Mondays are like math problems, you think you’ve solved them but they keep coming back to haunt you.
Monday is like a bad ex-boyfriend, always showing up uninvited and ruining your day.
Monday mornings: the pre-coffee version of a horror movie.
I hate Mondays so much, I wish they would rename it “Moanday”
My superpower is turning coffee into regret every Monday morning.
Monday is the only day of the week that you can hear people say “thank God it’s only Monday.”
I don’t dislike Monday mornings. I vehemently detest them with the burning passion of a thousand fiery suns.
I don’t always hate Mondays, but when I do, it’s because it’s Monday.
Mondays are proof that even the calendar wants to ruin your life.
I’m not a morning person. I’m not an afternoon person. I’m not even an evening person. I’m just not a Monday person.
Monday is the only day of the week where I can say “I need a vacation” and actually mean it.
If Mondays had a flavor, it would taste like burnt coffee and disappointment.
Monday is the day when reality hits you harder than your alarm clock.
I’m convinced that Mondays were invented by someone who wanted to test our ability to survive torture.
Monday is the only day of the week where you need a double shot of espresso just to cope with reality.
Mondays are like a bad hair day that lasts 24 hours.
Monday is the only day you can wake up and already feel behind on everything.
I don’t have a case of the Mondays; I have a whole suitcase.
Monday: the only day of the week that needs a parental advisory warning.
Monday, the day that reminds you why weekends are so important.
If Monday had a face, I would punch it… with a boxing glove made of coffee beans.
Mondays are like a horror movie sequel that nobody asked for.
Monday: the day that proves coffee doesn’t solve all problems.
On Mondays, I feel like a potato that’s been left out in the rain for too long.
I hate Mondays so much, I’d rather go to the dentist for a root canal.
Monday is like a math problem; I’m never quite sure of the solution, and it gives me a headache.
Dear Monday, I think you should take a vacation. Trust me, nobody will miss you.
My favorite exercise is a Monday morning stretch to reach for the snooze button.
I’m not saying I hate Mondays, but if Monday had a face, I would punch it. Repeatedly.
The only thing worse than Monday is realizing that tomorrow is only Tuesday.
Monday: The day I start counting down to Friday.
If Mondays were shoes, they’d be Crocs – everyone hates them but they still exist.
Dear Monday, I think it’s time we see other people.
Monday is a reminder that nothing good lasts forever, not even weekends.
If Monday had a superpower, it would be the ability to drain the happiness out of any room.
Monday: The day when you question every life choice that led you here.
Monday: when your to-do list is longer than your patience.
I’m not saying I hate Mondays, but I wouldn’t mind if they were replaced with a second Saturday.
Monday is like a bad ex-boyfriend. It keeps showing up uninvited and ruins everything.
I need a nap to recover from Monday’s existence.
I’m not saying I hate Mondays, but if Monday was a person, I would be in jail for murder.
I’m not saying Mondays are terrible, but they are definitely a Monday.
Mondays are the reason I drink… coffee excessively.
Monday is the perfect day for a mental health day…every week.
Mondays are proof that the universe has a twisted sense of humor.
My favorite exercise on Mondays is jumping to conclusions.
I don’t need an alarm clock on Mondays, my disdain for the day wakes me up promptly.
Monday is the only day of the week that needs a warning label: Caution, may cause extreme grumpiness.
Monday: the only day of the week that’s worse than a math test.
Monday is the only day of the week that is an actual villain.
I hate Mondays so much that even Garfield is jealous.
Monday is like a math problem – you’re not sure why it exists, and it always seems to have too many variables.
Monday is the reason why I need a sarcasm font.
If there was a contest for Monday haters, I’d win first place… every single week.
Monday is like a math problem; I try to solve it, but it never adds up.
Monday: the only day of the week where the phrase “I need another vacation” is most commonly uttered.
If Monday had a personality, it would be a mix of Grumpy Cat and the Grinch.
Monday: the day where everything goes wrong, even the calendar agrees.
I don’t hate Mondays, but I’m pretty sure they hate me.
Monday is the day that reminds me I still haven’t won the lottery.
I don’t need a calendar to know it’s Monday, my face says it all.
The only good thing about Monday is that it’s a socially acceptable day to drink copious amounts of coffee.
Mondays are like a bad haircut, you just have to wait for them to grow out.
Monday: The only day when you can say “I need a vacation” after a two-day weekend.
I don’t trust anything that starts with “Mon” and doesn’t end with “ey.” Mondays, money… you get it.
If Monday had a face, I’d punch it. And then apologize, because violence is never the answer.
I have a love-hate relationship with Mondays. I love to hate them.
Monday is like a bad ex-boyfriend, it keeps showing up when you least expect it.
On Mondays, I wonder if my bed is as disappointed as I am that I got out of it.
The only thing worse than a Monday is a Monday that feels like a Monday.
Monday is the root of all evil, or at least the root of my grumpiness.
Monday: Coffee’s way of saying, “I have a feeling you’re gonna screw up today.”
Monday is the reason why I have trust issues with the calendar.
I don’t hate Mondays, but I strongly dislike everything about them.
Dear Monday, I think we should see other people. Preferably people who aren’t Monday.
Mondays are so awful that even Garfield would consider them too gloomy.
I’m not saying I hate Mondays, but they definitely feel like a bad hair day for my soul.
Monday is the only day of the week that comes with a built-in dislike button.
Dear Monday, you can’t sit with us.
Monday called, it wants to talk to your manager.
My love for Mondays is like my love for spiders – non-existent and terrifying.
Dear Monday, can you please go step on a Lego? Thanks.
If Monday had a spirit animal, it would be a sloth on sedatives.
I hate Mondays so much, I consider it my civic duty to warn others about them.

Monday Hating Dad Jokes

Monday Hating Dad Jokes are the ultimate combination of sarcasm and humor specifically designed to make you smirk and sigh simultaneously.

These are the type of jokes that are so painfully relatable, they’re actually hilarious.

Perfect for office meetings, water cooler talks, or simply to lighten the mood on the most dreaded day of the week.

Prepare yourself for the eye-rolls and chuckles.

Here are some Monday Hating Dad Jokes that are guaranteed to kick start your week:

Why did the scarecrow dislike Mondays? Because it always felt like it was being stuffed with work!
Why did the coffee file a complaint about Mondays? Because it couldn’t handle the “brew-tal” start of the week!
Why did the photographer hate Mondays? Because they always framed the beginning of a long week!
Why did Monday refuse to go to the gym? Because it already felt like it had been through a workout just by existing!
Why don’t people trust Mondays with their secrets? Because they have a bad case of leaking information and spreading the Monday gossip!
Why did the light bulb hate Mondays? Because they always felt dim compared to the weekend!
Why did the refrigerator hate Mondays? Because it was always “chilled” out on the weekends!
Why did the math book hate Mondays? Because it found them “sum-what” depressing.
What do you call a Monday that’s actually enjoyable? A myth!
Why did the bicycle refuse to go to work on Mondays? Because it got tired of being a two-tired vehicle!
Why don’t Mondays like playing cards? Because they always get dealt a bad hand!
Why do Mondays feel like they last longer than any other day? Because they’re a punishment for all the weekend fun!
Why did Monday get into an argument with the rest of the week? Because it always felt like it was carrying the heaviest load!
Why don’t Mondays ever go to the beach? Because they can’t find a good tide to go!
Why did the math book hate Mondays? Because they always try to multiply the misery!
Why did the musician hate Mondays? Because they couldn’t find the right note to start the week!
Why do Mondays make terrible comedians? Because they’re always bringing down the week with their punchlines!
Why did the calendar refuse to go to work on Mondays? Because it wanted to keep its weekends dates-free.
Why did the bicycle refuse to ride on Mondays? Because it didn’t want to get its “moo-d” down!
Why did the donut hate Mondays? Because it always felt glazy and confused!
Why did the chef hate Mondays? Because it’s the day they always run out of “weekend leftovers”!
Why don’t Monday mornings ever apologize? Because they think they’re always right on schedule!
Why did the garden tools hate Mondays? Because they always had to dig themselves out of the Monday hole!
Why do Mondays have a bad reputation? Because they always show up uninvited and overstaying their welcome!
Why did the scarecrow refuse to work on Mondays? Because it was a real “Monday hater”!
Why don’t Mondays like roller coasters? Because they prefer the downhill slope of the weekend!
Why did the calendar go to therapy? Because it hated Mondays and had serious commitment issues!
Why don’t Mondays go to the beach? Because they already have enough waves of sadness!
Why do Mondays feel like a punch in the gut? Because they never listen to your pleas for mercy!
Why did Monday refuse to answer the phone? Because it knew it would only be bad news on the other end!
Why did the pencil hate Mondays? Because they were always feeling sharp on the weekends!
Why was the Monday always so tired? Because it had to drag itself out of bed every week!
Why don’t Mondays like to play cards? Because they’re always dealing with a full deck of work!
Why did the dad joke enthusiast hate Mondays? Because they always fell flat!
Why don’t Mondays ever go to the park? Because they hate all the fun!
Why don’t Mondays like shopping? Because they can’t find any “deals” to cheer them up!
Why did the calendar file a police report? Because Monday had “stolen” its happiness!
Why do Mondays always feel like they’re dragging? Because they can never seem to get the weekend out of their system.
Why did the musician hate Mondays? Because they always felt like a major chord of sadness!
Why did the football hate Mondays? Because it was tired of being “tackled” by the workweek!
Why did the clock hate Mondays? Because it felt like it was always ticking too slow.
Why did the banana despise Mondays? Because it always felt ‘peeled’ under the pressure!
Why did the tree hate Mondays? Because it couldn’t leaf the weekend behind!
Why did the calendar refuse to go to the party on Monday? It heard that Mondays are a drag!
Why do Mondays hate math? Because it always makes them feel number-iated!
Why did the skeleton hate Mondays? Because they had no body to enjoy the weekend with!
Why do Mondays never win at poker? Because they’re always getting dealt a bad hand.
Why did the dog hate Mondays? Because it couldn’t handle the “ruff” start of the week!
Why did Monday break up with Sunday? Because it couldn’t handle the pressure of following such a relaxing day!
Why did the fireman hate Mondays? Because they always put out his “fry”-day enthusiasm!
Why did the sandwich artist hate Mondays? Because they always needed to put in extra ham!
What did one Monday say to the other? “I can’t wait for Friday to come, it’s such a weak day!”
Why did the calendar refuse to go to work on Mondays? Because it felt it was always ‘date’ed for disaster!
Why did the calendar hate Mondays? Because they always get the weekends off!
Why don’t Mondays like to be photographed? Because they always develop a negative image.
Why did the math book hate Mondays? Because they always meant a whole week of problems to solve.
Why did the calendar take a vacation on Mondays? Because it needed a break from the Monday grind!
Why did the pillow hate Mondays? Because it never got enough rest over the weekend.
Why did Monday break up with Sunday? Because Sunday always got all the fun and left Monday with the blues.
Why did the computer go on strike every Monday? It had a serious case of “processor procrastination!”
Why do Mondays always insist on being so gloomy? Because they believe in starting the week off on a low note and setting the tone for the rest of the days!
Why do Mondays always feel like a horror movie? Because they start the week with a fright and make you scream for Friday!
Why did the coffee cup hate Mondays? Because they always got mugged on the weekends!
Why do Mondays and grumpy cats get along so well? Because they both have a talent for spreading negativity!
What did Monday say to the rest of the days? “I’m sorry I have to be so tough on you, but someone has to start the week off right!”
Why did the golfer hate playing on Mondays? Because they always had a hole in one… in their schedule!
Why don’t Mondays like to play football? Because they always get “sacked”!
Why did Monday get a restraining order? Because it wanted to keep its distance from everyone’s happiness and fun!
Why did the calendar complain about Mondays? Because they felt like all the days were week!
Why did the calendar refuse to work on Mondays? Because it wanted to have a day off for mourning!
Why do Mondays feel so long? Because they’re a sum of all your weekend regrets!
Why did the lamp hate Mondays? Because it was always being “switched” from relaxation to work mode!
Why did the tomato turn red every Monday? It was always ketchup-ing on the weekend gossip!
Why did the scarecrow hate Mondays? Because they were always getting a-head!
Why did the gardener hate Mondays? Because they were always rooting for the weekend!
Why do Monday mornings feel so bad? Because they’re the start of a long, torturous week!
Why did the calendar start Monday hating? Because it always felt like a week had just begun!
Why did the ice cream cone hate Mondays? Because it could never scoop up enough energy for the day!
Why did Monday apply for a job as a garbage collector? Because it thought it could handle all the trash people throw at it!
Why did the coffee cup hate Mondays? Because it always felt so “pressed” for time!
Why do Mondays hate math? Because it’s just another problem they can’t solve.
Why did the teddy bear hate Mondays? Because they’re unbearable!
Why do Mondays make great thieves? Because they always take the weekend away!
Why did Monday become a motivational speaker? Because it wanted to convince everyone that they too can survive its dreadful presence!
Why did the calendar always hate Mondays? Because they were always so busy!
Why did the bicycle refuse to ride on Mondays? It didn’t want to pedal through the Monday blues!
Why did the pencil refuse to write on Mondays? Because it was feeling a bit “blue”!
Why did the scarecrow hate Mondays? It wanted to be “un-haunted” instead!
Why did the computer programmer hate Mondays? Because they always found a bug in their code on Monday mornings!
Why did the math book hate Mondays? Because it couldn’t handle all the ‘minus’ signs!
Why did the computer hate Mondays? Because it couldn’t handle the “byte” of the work!
Why did Monday go to therapy? Because it had a case of the Monday blues and needed to work through its issues!
Why did the lampshade dislike Mondays? Because it always found itself ‘shaded’ from the weekend fun!
Why did the pencil avoid Mondays? Because it didn’t want to ‘draw’ out the workweek!
Why did the pencil hate Mondays? Because it couldn’t sharpen its enthusiasm.
Why did the pencil hate Mondays? Because it felt it was always “sharp” contrast to the weekend.
Why don’t Mondays ever win an argument? Because they always lack a strong “case of the Mondays.”
Why did the basketball player hate Mondays? Because they couldn’t handle the full court press!
Why don’t Mondays ever join social media? Because they don’t like to post their #MondayStruggles for everyone to see!
Why did the skeleton hate Mondays? Because it had no guts for the start of the week!
Why did the pencil hate Mondays? Because it always got lead into trouble!
Why did the painter dread Mondays? Because it was always a ‘brush’ with disaster!
Why did the lampshade hate Mondays? Because it felt overshadowed by the weekend!
Why did the skeleton hate Mondays? Because it couldn’t find the guts to face another week!
Why did the beach umbrella hate Mondays? Because it preferred to stay in the sun, not the office!
Why don’t Mondays like to play cards? Because they can’t handle the ‘week’ hands!
Why don’t calendars like Mondays? Because they find them “days-pressing”
Why did Monday become a professional grump? Because it realized that hating everything was its true calling!
Why did the coffee file a police report on Mondays? Because it got “mugged” every weekend.
Why did Monday become a traffic cop? Because it loved ruining everyone’s morning commute!
Why did the calendar get in trouble? Because it was always Monday hating!
Why did the scarecrow always hate Mondays? Because it was always feeling a little straw-ngry!
Why did the lawn mower hate Mondays? Because they always got stuck in the grass!
Why did the dog hate Mondays? Because they always left a bad taste in its mouth!
Why did the tree dislike Mondays? Because it found them “root-ine”
Why did the tomato turn red with anger on Mondays? Because it couldn’t “ketchup” with the weekend.
Why did the clock hate Mondays? Because it wanted to go back in time and skip them!
Why did the lamp hate Mondays? Because it always felt a little dim.
Why did the dictionary hate Mondays? Because they always had to define a case of the Monday grumbles!
Why did the carpenter hate Mondays? Because they were always board and looking for a nail in the week!
Why did the alarm clock refuse to wake up on Mondays? Because it needed a few more snooze-days!
Why did the tomato hate Mondays? Because they couldn’t ketchup with the weekend!
Why did the calendar refuse to go to work on Mondays? It felt like it was just going in circles!
Why did the garden gnome hate Mondays? Because they were always stuck in the Monday blues!
Why did the dog hate Mondays? Because it couldn’t fetch any fun on the first day of the week!
Why did the cat sleep all day on Mondays? Because it was feline “lazy”!
Why did the bicycle hate Mondays? Because it was always getting tired!
Why did the cat hate Mondays? Because they always ruined its “caterday” fun!
Why did the office worker hate Mondays? Because Monday was always “faxcinating” them with more work!
Why did the athlete hate Mondays? Because it meant back to the grind and Monday was always running away from them!
Why don’t Mondays ever go to the playground? Because they hate swings and just can’t slide into the week!
What did one Monday say to the other? “I don’t hate you, but I’m not in love with you either.”
Why don’t scientists trust Mondays? Because they always make their experiments go wrong by Monday-izing them.
Why did the calendar file a complaint against Mondays? Because they are always the first ones to ruin its week!
What did one Monday say to the other? “I’m only here because my alarm clock is a traitor!”
Why do Mondays never like to play hide and seek? Because they always make themselves too obvious!
Why did the math teacher hate Mondays? Because they had to find the square root of Monday Hating!
Why did Monday avoid going to the park? Because it didn’t want to see people having fun while it was feeling miserable!
Why did the math teacher hate Mondays? Because they’re always looking for a solution to the Monday blues!
Why did Monday get into a fight with Friday? Because Monday just couldn’t handle the weekend’s popularity.
Why do fish hate Mondays? Because they always end up feeling like they’re “trout” of luck.
Why did the music teacher hate Mondays? Because they always had treble with the day!
Why did the pencil hate Mondays? Because it couldn’t erase the fact that it was the start of the week!
Why did the bicycle hate Mondays? Because it felt tired all day!
Why did the gardener hate Mondays? Because it meant another week of weeding and Monday never “grew” on them!
Why did the scarecrow hate Mondays? Because they always reminded him of his ‘hay’ job!
Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything… except for Mondays!
Why did Monday go to therapy? Because it had a deep-seated hatred for the beginning of the week!
Why did the clock hate Mondays? Because it had a difficult time adjusting to the Monday grind!
Why are Mondays like math problems? They both make you want to cry!
Why did the computer hate Mondays? Because it couldn’t “byte” off more than it could chew!
What’s Monday’s favorite way to start the day? With a big mug of “Moaning” coffee.
Why did the basketball player hate Mondays? Because they always felt like they were missing their shot!
Why do Mondays hate math? Because they can never seem to count on a good start!
Why did the broom hate Mondays? Because it couldn’t “sweep” away the Monday blues.
Why did the math book hate Mondays? Because it knew it would be dealing with a lot of problems!
Why did the musician hate Mondays? Because it was always a major downbeat!
Why did the basketball player hate Mondays? Because they were a real slam-dunk of disappointment!
Why did the calendar hate Mondays? Because they always wanted to change the date!
Why did the bicycle hate Mondays? Because it felt like it was “wheel-y” dragging itself to work.
Why did the computer hate Mondays? Because it couldn’t “mouse” around like it does on weekends.
Why did the bicycle hate Mondays? Because they always had a flat tire of motivation!
What did one Monday say to the other? “We have to stop meeting like this!”
Why did Monday become a weather forecaster? Because it wanted to rain on everyone’s parade!

Monday Hating Jokes for Kids

Monday hating jokes for kids are like the friendly monsters under the bed of the humor realm—harmless, amusing, and always a hit with the little ones, especially on a Monday morning.

These jokes encourage kids to approach a new week with a pinch of humor, making the transition from weekend to weekdays a little easier.

They promote laughter and fun, fostering a love for humor that’s as rejuvenating as a good night’s sleep.

Plus, Monday hating jokes for kids have the added advantage of turning a somewhat dreaded day into a source of laughter.

Even the grumpiest Monday morning can be transformed with a little humor!

Ready for a great start to the week?

Here are the jokes that’ll have them laughing all the way to school:

Why did the soccer ball hide on Mondays? It couldn’t handle all the ‘Monday Goal-den’ opportunities!
Why did the monkey dislike Mondays? Because it wanted an extra day to relax and swing from trees!
Why did the banana hate Mondays? Because it didn’t have any a-peel!
Why did the clock despise Mondays? Because it felt like the hands were moving too slow on that day!
Why did the sun feel sad on Mondays? Because it missed the weekend’s rays of fun!
What’s the monster’s least favorite day of the week? Moanday!
Why did the pencil case refuse to open on Mondays? It wanted to keep all the fun and creativity locked away until Tuesday!
Why did the pencil dislike Mondays? Because it always had to get back to the “point”!
Why did the bird hate Mondays? Because it had to leave its cozy nest and go to school!
Why did the math book hate Mondays? Because it couldn’t figure out why they always came after Sundays!
Why did the scarecrow hate Mondays? Because they are just plain corny!
Why did the soccer ball refuse to play on Mondays? It didn’t want to be kicked around on a day that everyone hates!
Why did the soccer ball despise Mondays? Because it knew it would have to roll into the field and face a whole new week of games!
Why did the computer dislike Mondays? Because it always got the Monday bluescreen!
Why did the soccer ball always hate Mondays? Because it never got a kick out of them!
Why did the Monday refuse to play cards? It didn’t want to deal with any more Monday blues!
Why did the cat sleep all day on Mondays? Because it believed in “Monday Meow-naps” to escape the start of the week!
Why did the spider dislike Mondays? Because it couldn’t “web” any excitement for the day!
What did the Monday say to the weekend? “I’m coming for you!”
Why did the banana refuse to go to work on Mondays? Because it wanted to “peel” back into the weekend!
Why did the lion hate Mondays? It didn’t like feeling “unroarly” at the beginning of the week!
Why did the pencil hate Mondays? Because it didn’t want to get sharpened for another week!
Why did the soccer ball hate Mondays? Because it always got kicked around by Monday blues!
Why did the pencil hate Mondays? Because it was tired of drawing the line!
Why did the socks hate Mondays? Because they always got lost in the chaos of the laundry on Mondays!
Why did the cat hate Mondays? Because it was too tired of pawsing on the weekend!
Why did the boy bring a ladder to school on Monday? He wanted to climb over it and skip the day!
Why did the ice cream cone hate Mondays? Because it always melted under the Monday blues!
Why did the dog groan on Mondays? Because it wanted to “paws” the start of the week!
Why did the dog hate Mondays? Because it had to “paws” its fun weekend activities!
What did one Monday say to the other Monday? Let’s not meet again for a week!
Why did the bee dislike Mondays? Because it couldn’t bee-lieve the weekend was over!
What did the Monday say to the weekend? You’re just two days of trouble!
Why did the computer hate Mondays? Because it had too many “bugs” to fix!
Why did the banana hate Mondays? It didn’t want to get peeled off the weekend fun!
Why did the teacher go to the beach on Monday? To test the waters before diving into the week!
Why did the calendar dislike Mondays? Because they were always the first day of the week!
Why did the pencil complain about Mondays? Because it didn’t like being “number two” on the list of days!
Why did the scarecrow hate Mondays? Because they were the worst days to get the crows to stay away!
Why did the broom hate Mondays? Because it always got swept away by the start of the week!
Why did the crayons complain about Mondays? They preferred coloring on weekends when they could brighten up everyone’s day!
Why did the pencil refuse to write on Mondays? It didn’t want to be part of a day filled with Monday hating!
Why did the broom dislike Mondays? Because it was tired of sweeping away the weekend fun!
Why did the vegetables complain about Mondays? They didn’t want to be chopped and cooked on a day everyone hates!
Why did the snowman hate Mondays? Because they always made him feel “melty” inside!
Why did the calendar not want to go to work on Monday? Because it heard it was the least popular day of the week!
Why did the math book dislike Mondays? Because it had too many problems to solve on that day!
Why do Mondays never trust the stairs? Because they’re always up to something!
Why did the cat hate Mondays? Because it couldn’t take its catnaps in peace!
What’s the difference between a teacher and Monday? One gives homework, the other gives a headache!
Why did the pencil complain about Mondays? Because it couldn’t get the point!
Why did the cookie cry on Monday? Because it felt crumby after the weekend!
Why did the banana hate Mondays? Because it always had to peel itself out of bed!
Why did the computer dislike Mondays? Because it couldn’t handle all the “Monday Blues” errors!
What do you call a Monday with perfect weather? A miracle!
Why did the cat hate Mondays? Because it couldn’t catch the Monday mouse!
Why was Monday always jealous? Because Sunday always got to rest!
What did the grumpy cat say to Monday? I’m feline un-paws-tastic about you!
Why did the lion hate Mondays? Because it couldn’t wait for the “mane” event on the weekend!
Why did the dog hate Mondays? It didn’t want to start the week “paws”-itively!
What did the Monday say to the weekend? “I hate your guts, but I love your style!”
Why did the clock feel depressed on Mondays? Because it knew it had a long “tick-tock” until the weekend!
Why did the pencil cry on Mondays? Because it felt a little “lead” down with the beginning of the school week!
Why did the dog dislike Mondays? Because it didn’t enjoy chasing its tail in circles every week!
Why did the computer hate Mondays? Because it couldn’t find the “escape” key to avoid them!
Why did the banana refuse to go to school on Monday? It found the whole idea very a-peeling!
What do you call a sad Monday? A blue day!
Why did the teddy bear refuse to get out of bed on Monday? It just wanted to bear-y its head in the pillows!
Why did the calendar go on a diet? Because it wanted to lose Monday pounds!
Why did the teddy bear hate Mondays? Because it always had a case of the Monday teddy bear blues!
Why did the playground swing refuse to move on Mondays? It wanted to take a break and enjoy the stillness of the day!
What did one Monday say to the other? I’m tired of being the least favorite day!
Why did the calendar hate Mondays? Because they were the least favorite days of the week!
Why did the basketball hate Mondays? Because it didn’t want to bounce back into action!
Why did the math book hate Mondays? Because it couldn’t count on having a good day!
Why did the basketball player hate Mondays? Because it was always a slam-dunk reminder that the weekend was over!
Why did the elephant hate Mondays? Because they were always “trunk-ated” too soon!
Why did the teacher hate Mondays? Because it was hard to make the students listen after the weekend!
Why did the clock always dread Mondays? Because it knew it would be ticking for a whole new week!
Why did the lamp hate Mondays? Because it always got switched on after a weekend of relaxation!
Why did the dog hate Mondays? Because it always had to get up early for its “Ruff” day!
Why did the banana go to school on Mondays? Because it wanted to learn how to peel itself away from the start of the week!
Why did the clock despise Mondays? Because it just couldn’t face another tick-tock of the week!
Why did the Monday wear sunglasses? To hide its Monday morning face!
Why did the calendar say Monday was a grumpy day? Because it always wanted to be Fry-day!
Why did the basketball player hate Mondays? Because they always had a lot of “hoop-la” to deal with!
Why did the scarecrow hate Mondays? Because it wanted a day off from being a “scare”crow!
Why did the computer refuse to turn on on Monday? It just couldn’t handle the Monday blues!
Why did the ice cream cone hate Mondays? Because it always ended up in a meltdown!
Why did the balloon pop on Mondays? Because it was blown up with Monday blues!
Why did the teacher hate Mondays? Because it was a lesson in misery!
Why did the bear refuse to wake up on Monday? It wanted to keep hibernating and avoid the ‘Monday Gloom’!
What do you get when you cross a grumpy cat with a Monday? A Meownday!
Why did the flower get upset on Mondays? Because it couldn’t blossom and enjoy the weekend like everyone else!
Why did the calendar refuse to go to work on Monday? Because it always gets a weak start!
Why did the computer screen frown on Mondays? It didn’t like facing the ‘Monday Blues’!
Why did the bicycle hate Mondays? Because it had too many spokes for a busy day!
Why did the computer hate Mondays? Because it didn’t want to start a “weak” with a Monday!
What did the calendar say to Monday? “I’m tearing you off the page!”
Why did the bicycle fall over on Monday? It was two-tired!
Why did the teacher take a ladder to school on Monday? Because she wanted to reach for the weekend!
Why did the teacher bring a ladder to school on Mondays? Because it was a high-stress day!
Why did the pencil refuse to write on Mondays? Because it felt too “pointless”!
Why did the mirror hate Mondays? Because it always reflected a gloomy start to the week!
Why did the banana go to school on Monday? To learn how to peel itself out of bed!
Why did the scarecrow always hate Mondays? Because it was the start of another corny week!
Why did the pencil complain about Mondays? Because it was tired of getting lead around!
Why did the pencil dislike Mondays? Because it couldn’t get its “lead” together!
Why did the Monday get into a fight with the weekend? It couldn’t stand its happy-go-lucky attitude!
Why did the football team hate Mondays? Because they always got tackled by the start of the week!
Why did the ice cream cone hate Mondays? Because it didn’t want to melt away the weekend fun!
Why did the sun hate Mondays? Because it always had to rise early and start the week with a bright attitude!
Why did the computer get grumpy on Mondays? Because it didn’t like to start the week with a “byte”!
Why did the cookie monster hate Mondays? Because they’re always a little crumby!
Why did the umbrella hate Mondays? Because it couldn’t stand the rainy Mondays anymore!
Why did the calendar go to therapy? Because it was tired of all the Monday mornings!
Why did the math book look sad on Monday? It hated all the problems it had to solve!
Why did the sandwich hate Mondays? Because it always got squished in the lunchbox!
Why did the computer screen dislike Mondays? It preferred to stay off and avoid facing the dreaded start of the week!
Why did the chicken cross the road on a Monday? To escape from all the Monday Hating going on in the barnyard!
Why did the Monday always feel so down? Because it was a little too close to Sunday!
Why did the banana have a problem with Mondays? Because it always had a peel-ing!
Why did the cat dislike Mondays? Because it had to paws for the whole week!
Why did the banana peel hate Mondays? Because it always slipped right into the week!
What did the teacher say to her students on Monday? “Let’s make this the most marvelous Monday ever!”
Why did the dog wear sunglasses on Mondays? Because it couldn’t bear to see another week start!
Why did the football team always lose on Mondays? Because they couldn’t get their “Monday Mojo” back!
Why did the pencil roll away on Mondays? It didn’t want to face all the ‘Monday Erasers’!
Why did the banana go to therapy on Mondays? Because it was peeling down!
Why did the scarecrow refuse to work on Mondays? It didn’t want to be a ‘Monday Miserable’!
Why did the teddy bear always hide on Mondays? It didn’t want to be hugged and squeezed until a happier day arrived!
Why did the alarm clock hate Mondays? Because it always got snoozed!
Why did the music note have a problem with Mondays? It wanted to play happy tunes, but Mondays always brought the Monday blues!
Why did the dog hate Mondays? Because it didn’t want to “fetch” another week of work!
Why did the calendar go on a diet? It didn’t want any Monday blues!
What do you call a Monday that’s feeling grumpy? A grouch day!
What did the clock say to Monday? Tick-tock, can you hurry up and end?+.
Why did the calendar go to therapy? Because it had too many Monday issues!
Why did the dog hate Mondays? Because it meant going back to obedience school!
Why did the student bring a ladder to school on Mondays? To climb over the day and reach the weekend!
Why did the computer get mad at Monday? Because it couldn’t find the space bar to escape!
Why did the tomato turn red on Monday? Because it saw the salad dressing and thought: “Oh no, not another boring Monday!”
Why did the bubblegum hate Mondays? Because it always stuck to the bottom of the shoe on Mondays!
Why did the dog have a grumpy face on Mondays? It didn’t like chasing its tail in ‘Monday Circles’!
Why did the soccer ball despise Mondays? Because it couldn’t find the Monday goal!
Why did the math book hate Mondays? Because it was always counting down to the weekend!
Why did the pencil dislike Mondays? Because it didn’t want to get all “pointless” work!
Why did the teacher wear sunglasses on Mondays? Because the students were so bright it hurt her eyes!
Why did the sun refuse to shine on Mondays? It didn’t want to brighten up a day that everyone hates!
Why did the pillow hate Mondays? Because it didn’t want to say goodbye to a relaxing weekend!
Why did the fish hate Mondays? Because it had to swim against the current of the new week!
Why did the dog refuse to chase its tail on Mondays? Because it was tired of going in circles!
Why did the computer mouse hate Mondays? Because it couldn’t click with the day!
Why did the pencil dislike Mondays? It always wanted to draw out the weekend longer!
Why did the tomato turn red when it saw Monday approaching? Because it was getting ready to “ketchup” on the week!
Why did the calendar go on a diet? Because it had too many Mondays!
Why did the teddy bear hate Mondays? Because it couldn’t bear the thought of starting the week without extra cuddles!
Why did the cookie hate Mondays? Because it always crumbled under the pressure of the week starting!
Why did the lamp hate Mondays? Because it didn’t want to “light up” another week of early mornings!

Monday Hating Jokes for Adults

Does the start of the workweek bring you down?

Monday hating jokes for adults are here to put a humorous spin on your least favorite day of the week.

These jokes skillfully interweave adult realities with a sprinkle of sarcasm and a healthy dollop of humor to help you shake off that Monday blues.

Just like that first sip of coffee, these jokes are guaranteed to kickstart your day with a hearty laugh, proving once again that laughter truly is the best medicine.

Ideal for office meetings, post-work drinks, or simply to share a laugh with friends, these jokes will turn your Monday frown upside down.

Here are some Monday hating jokes that are primed for adults:

Why did Monday join a gym? To exercise its ability to bring people down!
What did one Monday say to the other Monday? Let’s try to make people miserable together!
What did one Monday say to the other? I don’t feel like working today, let’s make everyone’s life miserable!
Why did the calendar refuse to go to work on Monday? It didn’t want to face another week!
Why did the scarecrow hate Mondays? It was tired of being stuck in a field all weekend!
Why did the soccer player hate Mondays? They were always dribbling too much work!
Why did the Monday refuse to apologize? It said, “I’m just fulfilling my duty of reminding you that weekends are short-lived!”
Why did the computer programmer hate Mondays? Because they couldn’t find the “Ctrl + Z” button to undo the weekend!
Why do vampires love Mondays? Because they can sink their teeth into a fresh week!
Why did Monday get upset at the calendar? Because it had too many dates and none of them were Friday!
Why do Mondays feel like a bad hair day? No matter what you do, it’s still a mess!
Why did the calendar refuse to go to work on Monday? It needed a day off to recover from the weekend!
Why did the calendar refuse to go to work on Monday? It wanted to work from home, in its pajamas!
Why did the scarecrow hate Mondays? Because they’re the start of a dreadful workweek!
What did the calendar say to Monday? “I’ve got my eyes on you!”
Why did the computer skip Monday’s meeting? It heard it was never a good day to start anything!
Why do people hate Mondays? Because even coffee needs a little motivation to wake up on that day!
Why did Monday go to therapy? Because it couldn’t handle the constant hate it received from everyone!
What did Monday say to the rest of the week? “I’m the only one who can make people dread five out of seven days!”
Why do Mondays feel like a kick in the teeth? Because they start the week with a frown!
Why did the coffee file a restraining order against Monday? It said Monday was always trying to keep it up late!
What’s the best way to survive a Monday at the office? Pretending it’s Friday and starting the countdown all over again!
Why did the cat refuse to get out of bed on Mondays? It believed in the power of purr-crastination!
Why did the golfer hate Mondays? Because they always drove him to the rough!
Why did the calendar go to therapy? Because it was always getting the Monday blues!
Why did Monday always feel left out? Because it was never invited to the weekend parties!
What did Monday say to Friday? “You’re only popular because you’re the gateway to the weekend!”
Why did the traffic light hate Mondays? It was always stuck on red!
Why is Monday like a math problem? You’re always looking for the X to make it disappear!
What’s Monday’s favorite type of exercise? Running late and jumping to conclusions!
Why did the cat hate Mondays? Because it felt like it had to purrsue its ambitions all over again!
Why don’t people trust Mondays? They are always up to something!
What did the calendar say to Monday? “I’m a big fan of your work… said no one ever!”
Why did Monday break up with Sunday? Because it couldn’t handle being in the shadow of a day that brings relaxation and joy!
Why do Mondays feel so long? Because they’re a punishment for all the fun we had over the weekend!
What’s the difference between a Monday and a rock? One is hard to get through, and the other is a rock!
Why did Monday run to the therapist? It couldn’t handle being the most hated day of the week anymore!
Why did the math book hate Mondays? Because they always started with problems!
Why do people hate Mondays? Because it’s the day that reality hits them like a ton of bricks!
What did the calendar say to Monday? “You’re not my type, we should just skip a week!”
Why did Monday get a job as a traffic cop? It loved making everyone’s day worse by causing gridlock on the roads!
Why did the alarm clock have a meltdown on Mondays? It couldn’t handle all the ‘tick-tockedness’!
Why did the calendar file a police report on Monday? It said it got mugged by all the other days!
Why did the coffee file a complaint against Monday? It kept getting mugged every morning!
Why did the coffee mug hate Mondays? It always needed a refill!
Why did the math teacher hate Mondays? Because it was always a problem!
Why did the calendar file a police report? It had a case of the Mondays!
Why did the Monday go to the doctor? It had a severe case of the “I-don’t-want-to-go-to-work” syndrome!
Why did Monday go to the gym? To work on its muscles so it can continue dragging us down all week long!
What’s the difference between a Monday morning and a punch in the face? At least the punch is over quickly!
Why did the comedian hate telling jokes on Mondays? Because they always fell flat like Monday mornings!
Why did the Monday go to the bank? To withdraw all the joy from people’s lives!
What’s the difference between Monday and a rock concert? People actually look forward to the rock concert!
Why did Monday always come last in school sports? It had a terrible case of the Monday blues!
What did one Monday say to the other Monday? “I wish it was Sunday again, at least then we had a Funday!”
Why did the skeleton refuse to work on Mondays? It didn’t have the guts to face another dreadful week!
Why did the dog refuse to go outside on Mondays? It said Monday was its least favorite leash day!
Why did the computer turn down a date with Monday? It heard it was a crash waiting to happen!
What did the coffee say to Monday morning? I’m ready for a refill!
Why did the math teacher hate Mondays? They could never count on them!
Why do Mondays hate weekends? Because weekends always steal their thunder!
Why did the man bring a ladder to work on Mondays? So he could climb out of the office window and escape!
What do you call someone who hates Mondays? A regular person!
Why did the golfer hate playing on Mondays? Because it was always a rough start to the week!
What’s Monday’s favorite movie? “The Devil Wears Prada” because it perfectly captures its evil essence!
Why did the coffee call in sick on Monday? It couldn’t handle the daily grind!
Why did the tomato turn red on Monday? Because it saw everyone else turning green with envy for the weekend!
What did the calendar say to Monday? “You’re the reason I have trust issues!”
Why did the calendar refuse to go on a date with Monday? It knew it would be a week-long commitment!
What did the office worker say when Monday rolled around? “I’d rather be in a coma than face this day!”
Why did the gardener hate Mondays? It couldn’t dig Mondays up from the root!
Why did the pencil refuse to write on Mondays? It needed a break from all the erasing!
Why did the pessimist hate Mondays? Because they believed Mondays were just a cruel reminder of the rest of the week to come!
Why did the athlete hate Mondays? Because they couldn’t “run away” from them!
Why did the man bring a ladder to work on Monday? Because he wanted to climb the corporate ladder faster!
Why do Mondays feel like a horror movie? Because they start with a “mon” and end with “day”!
Why don’t Mondays ever get arrested? Because they’re always innocent until proven awake!
Why was Monday so good at math? It always knew how to multiply the problems!
Why did Monday cross the road? To kick you in the backside!
Why do Mondays feel like an ex? Because they never seem to leave you alone!
Why do we dread Mondays? Because they’re proof that even time has a sense of humor… a very twisted one!
Why did the scarecrow hate Mondays? It was always getting a case of the “Monday’s crow!”
Why did the scarecrow hate Mondays? Because they’re just a bunch of stuffing!
Why did the office worker bring a ladder to work on Mondays? To climb up and over the Monday blues!
Why did the chicken cross the road on Monday? To escape the Monday blues and find a new coop!
Why did Monday cross the road? To show the chicken that there’s no escaping the start of the workweek!
Why did Monday cross the road? To show that even the worst day can have a purposeless journey!
Why did the alarm clock refuse to wake up on Mondays? It said, “I’m sick of starting the week with a rude awakening!”
Why do Mondays exist? To remind us that even Satan has a sense of humor!
Why did the Monday go to the doctor? It needed a ‘weekendectomy’!
Why was Monday always such a bad influence? It was always encouraging everyone to “start fresh” with a Monday hangover!
Why did the coffee file a complaint on Monday? It was tired of being grounds for everyone’s problems!
Why do Mondays hate mornings? Because they always want a second snooze button!
Why did the golf ball hate Mondays? Because it always got teed off!
Why did the math teacher hate Mondays? Because they were too “mean”!
Why are Mondays like math class? Nobody wants to deal with them, but they’re a necessary evil!
Why did the math book look forward to Monday? It knew it would get to see all its problems!
Why did Monday cross the road? To run away from all the people complaining about it!
Why did the musician hate Mondays? It couldn’t find its rhythm!
Why did the Monday party alone? Because it knew no one else would show up to celebrate its existence!
Why did the chef hate Mondays? Because it’s a recipe for disaster in the kitchen!
Why did the computer hate Mondays? It was tired of all the weekday crashes!
Why did the scarecrow hate Mondays? It felt like every day was a ‘corn-fusing’ mess!
Why did the computer programmer hate Mondays? Because they were always debugging their mood!
Why did Monday feel so down? Because it always gets blamed for the bad hair day everyone has!
Why did the calendar refuse to go to work on Mondays? Because it wasn’t ready to ‘flip out’ just yet!
Why did the computer screen call in sick on Mondays? It needed a little ‘monitority’ leave!
What did the Monday say to the weekend? “I hate seeing you again, but I’ll be back in a week!”
Why did the Monday always feel like a punchline? Because it was constantly being ‘knocked’ by everyone!
Why do Monday mornings feel like a punch in the face? Because weekends are a knockout!
Why did the chef hate Mondays? Because everything they created on the weekend went to waste!
Why don’t Mondays ever want to go to the beach? They prefer to stay in the weekend!
Why did the pencil despise Mondays? It felt like it had to erase the whole weekend!
Why did the math teacher hate Mondays? Because it felt like equation after equation was multiplying their stress!
Why do Mondays make people grumpy? Because they are the only days of the week that are spelled like “mon” and “day”!
Why did the Monday cross the road? To remind everyone that the weekend was over and they had to go back to work!
Why did the Monday cross the road? To ruin everyone’s day on the other side!
Why did the gardener hate Mondays? Because they couldn’t “plant” themselves on the couch anymore!
What’s the difference between Monday and a mad scientist? One’s a day you dread, and the other’s a person you dread!
Why do Mondays feel like they last forever? Because they’re a cruel punishment for all the fun we had on the weekend!
Why did the scarecrow hate Monday? It was always stuffed with work!
What did the clock say to Monday? “I’m watching you. Every minute of it.” .
Why did the golfer hate Mondays? Because they always ended up in the rough!
Why did the calendar file a police report? It got Monday arrested for repeated offenses!
Why did the man take a ladder to work on Monday? Because he wanted to climb his way out of the Monday blues!
Why did the artist hate Mondays? They felt “drawn out” after the weekend!
Why did the cat hate Mondays? It couldn’t paws-ibly handle another workweek!
Why did the coffee file a complaint? It couldn’t stand Mondays stirring things up!
Why did the Monday wish it was a different day? Because it knew it had a bad reputation for being the most disliked day of the week!
Why did the doughnut hate Mondays? It was tired of always getting dunked on!
Why did the calendar always feel sad on Mondays? Because it was always down a week!
What’s the difference between a Monday morning and a cactus? With a cactus, the pricks are on the outside!
What did the Monday say to the coffee? “I hate you so much, but I need you to survive!”
Why did the skeleton dread Mondays? Because he didn’t have the guts for it!
Why did Monday skip its morning coffee? It wanted to make everyone else suffer too!
Why did the Monday cross the road? To remind everyone that the weekend is long gone!
Why did Monday get into a fight with Friday? Because Friday kept stealing its thunder as the most anticipated day of the week!
Why don’t Mondays ever get along with the other days of the week? Because they are always mourning the weekend!
Why did the tomato turn red on Monday? It didn’t want to be mistaken for a Monday morning zombie!
Why did the computer have a case of the Mondays? Because it couldn’t find its “Any” key!
Why do people hate Mondays? It’s the only day that makes all the other weekdays seem bearable!
Why did the chef hate Mondays? Because they always “stirred up” trouble in the kitchen!
Why was Monday always jealous of Tuesday? Because Tuesday was always one day closer to Friday!
Why did the comedian hate Mondays? It couldn’t find the funny bone!
Why do Mondays hate working out? They always feel so weak!
Why did Monday get a job at the bakery? It kneaded the dough!
Why did the computer go to therapy on Mondays? It was suffering from a severe case of the Monday blues screen!
Why did the coffee file a restraining order against Monday? It couldn’t handle the daily grind!
Why did the man put his money in the blender on Monday? He wanted to make some liquid assets!
Why do Mondays feel like a bad ex? They keep coming back into our lives when we least expect it!
Why did Monday go to therapy? It had a case of recurring weekday depression!
Why did the baker hate Mondays? It couldn’t rise to the occasion!
Why did the zombie look forward to Mondays? It meant there would be a fresh batch of brains to feast on!
Why was the math teacher always grumpy on Mondays? Because he had too many problems to solve and not enough time!
Why did Monday go to therapy? It had a severe case of the “I don’t want to get out of bed” syndrome!
Why did Monday and Friday get into a fight? Monday accused Friday of stealing all the fun and leaving it with the work!
Why did the coffee file a complaint on Monday? Because it was always getting roasted!
Why do Mondays always feel like they have a grudge against us? Because they’re just jealous of our Sunday fundays!
Why do Mondays feel like a horror movie? Because they’re always followed by a sequel called Tuesday!
Why don’t Mondays like to play hide and seek? Because they always end up finding us no matter where we hide!
What did the calendar say to the Monday blues? I’m going to flip my days and start with Saturday instead!
Why did Monday refuse to play cards? It never wanted to deal with the weekend’s consequences!
What did Monday say to Friday? “You’re lucky, everyone loves you just because you’re the end of the week!”
Why did the skeleton hate Mondays? Because it was tired of being such a bone-chilling experience!
Why did the banana avoid Mondays? It didn’t want to slip up and ruin the whole week!
Why did the math book hate Mondays? It could never solve its Monday equations!
Why did the cat refuse to get out of bed on Monday? Because it realized it had used up all its lives dealing with the previous week!
Why did the math teacher hate Mondays? Because they’re full of subtraction and division!

Monday Hating Joke Generator

Feeling the Monday blues can sometimes seem like a never-ending tale of dread.

Did you just groan there?

That’s where our FREE Monday Hating Joke Generator comes into play to lighten the mood.

Concocted with witty quips, comic relief, and playful banter, it generates jokes that are bound to evaporate your Monday blues.

Don’t let your spirit sag under the weight of the first day of the week.

Use our joke generator to whip up jokes that are as cheerful and lively as your weekend vibes.

FAQs About Monday Hating Jokes

Why are Monday hating jokes so popular?

Monday hating jokes resonate with a wide audience because the start of the workweek is often associated with stress and the end of relaxation.

These jokes offer a funny, relatable way to vent about our shared experience of Monday blues.

Can Monday hating jokes help in social situations?

Definitely!

Monday hating jokes can lighten up the mood on a dreary Monday morning, create camaraderie among peers, or serve as an ice-breaker in work settings.

They are relatable and can evoke laughter, making the start of the week a bit more enjoyable.

How can I come up with my own Monday hating jokes?

Think about the common sentiments associated with Mondays—tiredness, a longing for the weekend, coping with a heavy workload, etc.
Consider the language and phrases typically related to Mondays. Words like blues, coffee, alarm, and weekend over can be a good starting point.
Visualize the scenario or setting of your joke. Is it at the office, at the coffee shop, or still stuck in bed?
Use popular sayings or catchphrases and spin them into a Monday context.
Don’t shy away from puns and wordplay! A clever twist of words can make your Monday joke stand out.

Are there any tips for remembering Monday hating jokes?

Associate the jokes with typical Monday situations, like a crowded commute, a stack of paperwork, or an early morning meeting.

Pairing these situations with a funny joke can make them easier to recall.

How can I make my Monday hating jokes better?

The secret lies in the surprise element.

Establish a common scenario and then flip it with a punchline.

The more you share and practice your jokes, the better you’ll become at gauging what gets the most laughs.

How does the Monday Hating Joke Generator work?

Our Monday Hating Joke Generator helps you start the week with a smile.

Just enter keywords related to your Monday scenario or sentiments, click the Generate Jokes button, and you’ll instantly get a bunch of humorous Monday hating jokes.

Is the Monday Hating Joke Generator free?

Yes, our Monday Hating Joke Generator is absolutely free!

You can create endless jokes to brighten your Mondays or bring a smile to your friends’ faces.

Get ready to kickstart your week with some laughter!

Conclusion

Monday hating jokes are a fantastic way to inject some fun into the start of the week, making the transition from weekend to workday a bit more bearable with each chuckle.

From quick one-liners to elaborate anecdotes, there’s a Monday hating joke for every situation.

So next time you’re grappling with the Monday blues, remember, there’s humor to be found in every groan, grumble, and gulp of coffee.

Keep sharing the smiles, and let the good times roll, even if it is just Monday.

Because after all, a day without laughter is like a Monday without coffee—unimaginable and, frankly, a bit less productive.

Happy joking, everyone!

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Coffee Jokes to Brew Up Some Monday Morning Humor

Weekend Jokes for Those Who Can’t Stand Mondays

Office Jokes That’ll Get You Through a Long Monday