547 Rugby Jokes for the Ultimate Ruck and Roll Laughs

If you’re here, it means you’re ready to tackle the world of rugby jokes.

Not just any jokes, but the best of the scrum.

That’s why we’ve kicked off with a list of the most hilarious rugby jokes.

From try-umphantly funny puns to offside one-liners, our compilation has a joke for every facet of the game.

So, let’s plunge into the thrilling ruck of rugby humor, one joke at a time.

Rugby Jokes

Rugby jokes are just the thing to lighten up any scrum or sideline.

They’re not merely about the sport itself, but also the culture and quirks that come with it.

From the intense rivalries to the unforgettable moments on the pitch, rugby offers plenty of fodder for humor.

The art of creating the ultimate rugby joke involves understanding the rules, the lingo, and the eccentricities of the game (like why a hooker isn’t what you might think, or how a game can last 80 minutes but feel like an eternity).

Ready to try and score a try with your humor?

Tackle your funny bone with these rib-tickling rugby jokes:

  • What do you call a gorilla playing rugby? A rugby tang-utang!
  • Why don’t rugby players ever go hungry? Because they always have a good lineout!
  • Why do rugby players do well in school? Because they always try to convert their tries!
  • What do you call a rugby player who has taken all his exams? A try-scholar!
  • What’s a rugby player’s favorite type of math? Tackle-trigonometry!
  • What did the rugby ball say to the player? “Throw me, I’m all kicked out!”
  • What do you call a rugby player who has been on the field for 80 minutes? A slow learner.
  • Why was the rugby ball cold? Because it was a little chilly outside!
  • Why don’t rugby players join bands? Because they’re always getting tackled by their fans!
  • What do rugby players say when they don’t understand something? “I’m a bit confused, can you explain that in scrum language?”
  • Why did the rugby player go to the bank? He wanted to make a forward pass in his savings!
  • What do you call a monkey who loves rugby? A scrum-chimp!
  • Why did the rugby player take his dog to the game? Because he wanted to play fetch with the referee.
  • What do rugby players do to get rid of stress? They scrum it off!
  • What do you call a rugby player with a glass of milk on his head? A cereal scrummer!
  • Why don’t rugby players go on vacation? Because they’re always trying to convert!
  • Why did the rugby ball go to school? To get a little more bounce in its education!
  • What did the rugby player say to the football player? “Our sport is tougher, we tackle without pads!”
  • Why did the rugby player always carry a thermometer on the field? He wanted to check if the competition was heating up!
  • Why was the rugby pitch always so muddy? Because the players always needed a little extra scrum-b!
  • What do you call a rugby player who can juggle? A multi-tasker on and off the field!
  • Why don’t rugby players like to get wet? Because they’re afraid of getting tackled by a shower!
  • Why did the rugby player start a bakery? Because he kneaded more dough for scrum-ptious tries!
  • What do you call it when a rugby player accidentally drops the ball? A fumble-rumble!
  • What do you call a rugby team made up of baby rabbits? The Hoppy Hares!
  • Why don’t rugby players use cell phones? Because they can’t find a good reception on the field!
  • Why did the rugby team go to the art museum? They wanted to tackle some abstract paintings!
  • Why did the rugby team go to the bakery? Because they heard they could get a good roll in!
  • Why was the rugby team always so cool? Because they always had fans!
  • What do rugby players do when they forget their lines? They improvise with a scrum!
  • Why do rugby players love math class? Because they enjoy tackling problems!
  • Why was the rugby player a terrible farmer? Because every time he tried to make a tackle, he missed!
  • Why don’t rugby players take up gardening? Because they prefer tackling instead of tackling!
  • Why did the rugby player bring a shovel to the match? In case he needed to dig deep for a try!
  • Why did the rugby player bring a pen and paper to the game? In case he needed to draw a lineout plan!
  • Why was the rugby field always so itchy? Because there were too many tries!
  • What do you call it when a rugby player takes a break? A half-time snack attack!
  • Why did the rugby team bring their own band to the game? Because they heard they needed some extra sax-on!
  • What do you call a rugby player who wins a lot of games? A try-umph!
  • Why was the rugby ball at the bakery? Because it wanted to get a little kneaded.
  • What do rugby players use to blow their noses? A try-sue!
  • What’s a rugby player’s favorite type of music? Heavy scrum and bass!
  • Why was the rugby player so good at math? He knew how to convert tries into points!
  • What do you get when you cross a rugby player and a giant? A try-saurus rex!
  • Why did the rugby player go to art class? He wanted to draw some lines on the field!
  • Why do rugby players make good detectives? Because they’re always looking for the try line!
  • What do rugby players do when they can’t find an open bar? They try a drop goal instead!
  • Why did the rugby player bring a pillow to the game? Because he wanted to try out some “try”s in comfort!
  • Why did the rugby team start a bakery? Because they wanted to specialize in turnovers!
  • Why did the rugby ball go to the party? Because it had great bounce-backability!
  • Why did the rugby team bring a ladder to the game? Because they heard the match would be a high-scoring affair!
  • What did the rugby player say when he found out he had won the lottery? “I’m going on a try-scoring spree!”
  • Why did the rugby player take a nap during the game? He needed to tackle his sleep deprivation!
  • What do you call a rugby player who steals the ball from the opponent? A “rugby bandit”!
  • Why did the rugby team go to outer space? Because they wanted to score a try in the milky way!
  • Why did the rugby team go to the music concert? Because they wanted to rock the scrum!
  • Why did the rugby player bring a ladder to the game? Because he wanted to climb up the try-scorers’ board!
  • What do you call a rugby player who scores a try while wearing roller skates? A “rolling try-scorer”!
  • What do you call a group of rugby players singing in harmony? A scrum-choir!
  • Why do rugby players make terrible comedians? Because they always drop the punchline!
  • Why don’t rugby players like to play hide and seek? Because they always get tackled!
  • What do you call a rugby player who becomes a chef? A scrum-licious cook!
  • Why did the rugby player bring a pencil to the game? So he could draw the line when it came to tackling!
  • What do you call a rugby player who cheats? Foul play!
  • Why did the rugby player go to the bank? He wanted to start a “try” savings account!
  • Why did the rugby team go to the bakery? Because they wanted to score some try-flavoured pastries!
  • What do you call a chicken that plays rugby? A scrum-diddly-umptious!
  • Why did the rugby team go to the bank? They wanted to score some tries and make a few conversions!
  • Why don’t rugby players ever use umbrellas? Because they prefer to tackle the weather!
  • Why did the scarecrow become a rugby player? Because he was outstanding in his field!
  • What do you call a rugby team that sings together? A scrum choir.
  • Why was the rugby team like a bakery? Because they kneaded a win!
  • Why did the rugby player become a gardener? Because he wanted to tackle the weeds!
  • What do you call a rugby player who scores a lot of tries? A try-athlete!
  • What do rugby players do when they go shopping? They try on everything!
  • Why did the rugby player bring a sponge to the game? In case they needed to soak up the pressure!
  • What’s a rugby player’s favorite song? “We Will Tackle You”!
  • Why don’t rugby players ever get lost? Because they always find their way through the scrum!
  • Why do rugby players make terrible surgeons? Because they always end up dropping the ball!
  • Why don’t rugby players like to eat bananas? Because they can’t find the zipper!

 

Short Rugby Jokes

Short rugby jokes are like a perfectly executed try—swift, exciting, and leaves the crowd roaring with laughter.

These jokes are perfect for matchday banter, social media posts, or those times when you need to break the ice at a sports gathering.

The charm of short rugby jokes lies in their ability to combine a love for the sport with quick, witty humor, scoring a comedic try in just a few short words.

And now, like a swift pass from the scrum-half, here are short rugby jokes that will tackle you with laughter in no time.

  • In case he wanted to score a try and touch the sky!
  • What do you call a rugby player with half a brain? Gifted!
  • What did the rugby player say when he lost his shoes?
  • Why are rugby players never lonely? They always make good scrum-buddies!
  • Oh no, I’ve lost my sole mates!
  • Why don’t rugby players ever get lonely? They always make a try!
  • Why do rugby players never buy new shoes? They prefer converting tries!
  • Why was the rugby ball in the library?
  • Why did the rugby player go to the bakery before the game?
  • Gifted!
  • Why was the rugby pitch so muddy? Too many scrums!
  • Because he wanted to reach the try-stand!
  • Why did the scarecrow become a rugby player?
  • A pork scrum!
  • A try-athlete!
  • What do rugby players do when they’re cold? They huddle up!
  • Why do rugby players do well in school?
  • Because he wanted to dream of a winning try!
  • Try-suits!
  • Because he wanted to tackle anything that moves!
  • What’s a rugby player’s favorite subject in school? Rug-biology!
  • Why do rugby players love gardening? Because they’re always tackling the weeds!
  • Why did the rugby player take a nap during the game?
  • What do rugby players wear to bed? Rugby pyjamas!
  • Why do rugby players make terrible singers? Because they always get tackled!
  • Why don’t rugby players ever go hungry? Because they always make tries!
  • What do rugby players do to relax? They scrum-ble!
  • Why do rugby players make terrible comedians? Their jokes always get tackled!
  • What’s a rugby player’s favorite type of gardening? Rucking and mauling!
  • What’s a rugby player’s favorite dance move? The try-step!
  • Because they know how to tackle every subject!
  • Because it wanted to get tackled by a bookmark!
  • Flipper-union!
  • Why did the rugby player wear two shirts?
  • Because he wanted to tackle all his fears!
  • To get his daily bread!
  • Why did the rugby player take his dog to the game?
  • In case he needed a prop!
  • In case he got a try and a conversion!
  • Because he wanted to win by a bark-try!
  • In case they needed a scrum-deck!
  • What position did the ghost play in rugby? Full-scare!
  • What’s a rugby player’s favorite kind of party? A scrum-diddly-umptious one!
  • What do you call a rugby player who switches sides? A flip-flopper!
  • In case he needed to tie up the score!

 

Rugby Jokes One-Liners

Rugby one-liner jokes are the embodiment of humor compressed into a single, quick-witted statement.

They’re akin to a swift, unexpected sidestep on the rugby field – stunning, clean, and remarkably impressive.

Crafting a fine rugby one-liner demands a mix of originality, accuracy, and a deep understanding of the beauty of puns and wordplay.

The challenge is to pack the setup and punchline into one compact sentence, scoring maximum laughter with minimal words.

Prepare for a scrum of laughter, as we kick off with these rugby one-liners:

  • What do you call a rugby team full of elephants? The never-ending scrum!
  • Why did the rugby player bring string to the match? Because he wanted to tie up the loose ends!
  • What did the rugby coach say to the vending machine? “I need a quarter-back!”
  • Why do rugby players make good comedians? Because they’re always quick to make a joke and tackle the punchline!
  • What did the rugby player say to the vending machine? “Give me my quarter back!”
  • Why was the rugby team’s bus so slow? It couldn’t get past the try line.
  • Why did the rugby player bring a spoon to the match? Because he heard there was going to be a scrum-diddly-umptious feast!
  • What did one rugby post say to the other? “Let’s stick together, we’re the ultimate goalposts!”
  • Why don’t rugby players have fancy weddings? Because they always prefer a scrum ceremony.
  • Why did the rugby player take up gardening? Because he heard he could score a try in the scrum-bush!
  • What do you call a rugby player with a broken arm? A handicapped hooker!
  • Why did the rugby ball join the circus? Because it wanted to be a high-flyer!
  • I wanted to join the rugby team, but they said I was too small. I guess they wanted someone with a bit more impact!
  • Why don’t rugby players get married? Because they’re always trying to avoid the scrum!
  • What’s a rugby player’s favorite type of dance? The scrumba!
  • What do rugby players do when they can’t find their ball? They tackle each other for fun instead!
  • Why did the rugby team hire a band? Because they wanted some good tackles!
  • Why did the rugby player become a musician? Because he wanted to try his hand at playing the try-angles!
  • Why did the rugby player go to the fancy restaurant? He heard they had a scrum-ptious menu!
  • I watched a rugby game and couldn’t understand why they kept passing the ball backwards. Then someone explained the concept of ‘going forward by going backward’. I’m still confused!
  • What do you call a rugby player who can’t pass the ball? A quarter pounder with no cheese.
  • What do rugby players use to fix their computers? Try-cycles!
  • Why did the rugby player bring string to the game? Because he heard they needed to tie the score!
  • Why did the rugby player become a chef? Because he loved tackling and chopping onions.
  • Why was the rugby field always so wet? Because of all the loose scrums!
  • Why did the rugby team go to the bakery? Because they wanted to get their fill of turnovers!
  • Why did the rugby team go to the fancy dress party? They wanted to tackle the costume contest.
  • Why did the rugby player always win at hide and seek? Because he was outstanding in his field!
  • What do you call a rugby player who can’t stop making jokes? A pun-ishing scrum-half.
  • Why did the rugby team bring a GPS to the match? They wanted to find their way to the try line.
  • Why was the rugby pitch always so hot? Because all the fans were there!
  • I used to play rugby, but I kept getting penalized for high tackles. Turns out, the other players were just too short.
  • What do rugby players eat for breakfast? Scrumptious!
  • Why did the rugby coach bring a ladder to practice? Because he wanted his team to reach new heights in the scrum.
  • I tried to tackle a rugby player once, but he ran right through me. I guess I’m more of a speed bump than a defender.
  • Why do rugby players always wear two pairs of socks? In case they get a hole-in-one!
  • What do you call a rugby player who can’t catch? A hooker without any game!
  • Why did the rugby player bring a can of beans to the match? In case there was a scrum-tious meal after the game!
  • I tried to become a rugby player, but I couldn’t handle the scrum-tious food after the game.
  • Why do rugby players never bring an umbrella to a game? Because they prefer to tackle the weather head-on!
  • What did the rugby player say when he couldn’t find his jersey? “It’s a ruck-ception!”
  • Why did the rugby ball join a band? It wanted to be a part of the scrum and bass.
  • Why do rugby players always carry a spare shirt? In case they get a try and lose their shirt!
  • Why did the rugby player bring a compass to the game? Because he wanted to find his way to the try line!
  • Why was the rugby field always so confident? Because it knew how to tackle any situation!
  • What did the rugby player say when he scored a try? “That’s a try-fecta!”
  • Why did the rugby player join the baking club? He wanted to make turnovers!
  • What did the rugby ball say to the goalpost? “I’m trying to score a try, can you give me a hand?”
  • Why did the rugby team hire a comedian as their coach? Because they needed someone to tackle the tough jokes!
  • Why did the rugby player bring a shovel to practice? He wanted to tackle some serious dirt.
  • Why did the rugby player take a job at the bakery? He kneaded the dough.
  • Why was the rugby team always so hot? Because they never passed up a try!
  • Why did the rugby player bring a ladder to the game? Because he heard the competition was fierce and he wanted to be on top of his game!
  • Why was the rugby team always so happy? They never had a rough scrum-time!
  • What did the rugby ball say to the player? “Throw me a pass and let’s have a ball!”
  • Why did the rugby player join a band? He wanted to be the hooker for the scrum-ba-laya!
  • Why did the rugby team start a band? Because they wanted to “tackle” the music industry!
  • What’s a rugby player’s favorite type of footwear? Cleats or not, it’s all booting the ball anyway!
  • Why don’t rugby players make good comedians? Their jokes are always a try too hard!
  • Why did the rugby player bring a pillow to the game? So he could have a soft landing after getting tackled!
  • What do you call a rugby player who loses his shoes during a game? Barefoot forward.
  • What do rugby players say when they win a match? “Try and stop us!”
  • Why do rugby players make great detectives? Because they never drop the ball on solving mysteries!
  • Why do rugby players make bad comedians? Because their jokes are always a bit rough.
  • Why did the rugby player become a comedian? He knew how to deliver a punchline, both on and off the field!
  • What did the rugby ball say to the player? “Catch you later, I’m off to make some conversions!”
  • Why was the rugby team always so flexible? Because they were always doing the forward roll!
  • I told my friend I played rugby, and he asked if it was like football. I said, ‘No, it’s more like trying to wrestle with a herd of buffalo!’.
  • What did one rugby ball say to the other? “I’ve got a lot of bounce-back in me.”
  • What did the rugby ball say to the players? “I’m tired of being kicked around, can’t you pass me a break?”
  • Why don’t rugby players wear watches? Because they already know how to tackle time!
  • What do rugby players say to motivate themselves before a game? “Let’s try our best to tackle this challenge!”
  • Why did the rugby player go to culinary school? He wanted to tackle the art of cooking.
  • Why was the rugby player a great teacher? Because he always knew how to tackle the subject!
  • What do you call a rugby player who’s lost all his money? A penniless prop!
  • Why did the rugby player go to school early? He wanted to catch the kickoff!
  • Why did the rugby player bring a bicycle to the game? Because he wanted to score a wheel-y good try!
  • I asked my rugby coach if I could play in the game, and he said, ‘Sure, why not? You’re already a pro at dropping the ball!’.
  • Why do rugby players love math? Because they always make a conversion!
  • Why did the rugby team go to the dentist? Because they needed to tackle their cavities!
  • Why did the rugby team have a picnic in the middle of the game? Because they wanted to try a scrum-ptious meal.
  • Why was the rugby team always so thirsty? Because they always wanted to score a “try”athlon!
  • What do you call a sheep that plays rugby? A woolly forward!
  • What did the rugby player say when he scored a try? “I’m just try-ing to have a ball!”
  • Why was the rugby match played in a zoo? Because both teams were looking for a good forward pack!
  • Why did the rugby ball go to school? It wanted to get a little more education on being kicked around!
  • What do rugby players eat before a big game? Scrumptious tackles!
  • What did the rugby player say when he scored a try? “I’m just here for the post-match pints!”
  • What do you call a rugby player who loves gardening? A scrum-thumber!
  • I asked my rugby coach for some tips on tackling, and he said, “Just aim for the other guy’s kneecaps.” Thanks, coach.
  • Why did the rugby player always carry an umbrella? In case it started raining tries!
  • What did the rugby player say to his opponents? “I’m gonna tackle you so hard, you’ll think I’m a loan shark!”
  • I asked a rugby player if he ever gets tired during a game. He replied, “Only when I try to outrun the ball.”
  • What did the rugby player say to the doctor? I keep getting tackled and I have no defense!
  • Why did the rugby team go to the circus? To see the amazing ruck and maul performances!
  • Why do rugby players make great firefighters? Because they’re always ready for a tackle!
  • What did the rugby player say to his teammates after a successful match? “We really nailed it!”
  • Why did the rugby player join the circus? Because he heard they needed someone who could juggle balls and tackle clowns!
  • I tried watching a rugby game on TV, but it was like trying to understand a foreign language where everyone is aggressively hugging each other.
  • What do rugby players do when they’re bored? They tackle their problems!
  • I tried playing rugby once, but I quickly realized I was just a tackle dummy with a pulse.
  • Why don’t rugby players make good detectives? Because they can’t pass a lineout without dropping clues.
  • What do rugby players do when they can’t find their ball? They tackle everything that moves until they find it!
  • Why did the rugby ball go to school? It wanted to learn how to get kicked around by professionals!
  • Why did the rugby team go to the bakery? Because they kneaded some extra points!
  • Why don’t rugby players bring BBQ grills to the game? Because they can’t catch a pass without dropping it.
  • What do rugby players do when they can’t find their jersey? They try to collar it!
  • What’s a rugby player’s favorite kind of dessert? A scrum-delicious cake!
  • Playing rugby is like running with scissors, except the scissors are massive and trying to tackle you.
  • What’s a rugby player’s favorite kind of music? Heavy tackle!
  • Why do rugby players make great comedians? They’re always looking for a good prop to tackle!
  • Why did the rugby player always carry a map? In case he got tackled and needed to find his way back to the field!
  • I joined a rugby team, but they kicked me out for constantly yelling “Try, try again!” whenever someone missed a shot.
  • Why did the rugby player take up knitting? Because he wanted to make his own try-scarf!
  • Why did the rugby team go to the bakery? Because they wanted a good roll for their scrum.

 

Rugby Dad Jokes

Rugby dad jokes are the ultimate combination of humor and witticisms, designed to provoke both chuckles and cringes in equal measure.

These are the type of jokes that are so absurd, they’re absolutely hilarious.

Ideal for game nights, friendly banter, or simply to brighten up someone’s day, rugby dad jokes never fail to deliver a hearty laugh.

Prepare for the eye rolls and amused sighs.

Here are some rugby dad jokes that are guaranteed to be a hit:

  • Why do rugby players make terrible comedians? Because their jokes always end up going over the line!
  • What do you call a rugby player who’s been hit in the face with a ball? A front row forward!
  • Why do rugby players make good comedians? Because they’re always tackling funny situations!
  • Why did the rugby player become a chef? Because he wanted to master the art of scrum-ble eggs!
  • Why did the rugby team go to the music store? They wanted to buy some good hits!
  • Why do rugby players bring a ladder to the game? So they can try to reach the high tackle!
  • Why did the rugby player become a chef? Because he knew how to season the game and serve up a winning dish!
  • What did the rugby ball say to the player? “I’ll always be there for you, just give me a try!”
  • Why did the rugby player bring a pair of binoculars to the game? So he could get a closer look at the lineout!
  • What do rugby players do when they hear a good joke? They scrum with laughter!
  • Why did the rugby team go to the bakery? To get some scrum-ptious treats!
  • Why did the rugby player bring a map to the game? Because he heard the opposition was going to take him offside!
  • Why did the rugby player bring a loaf of bread to the game? In case he wanted to score a try and make some toast!
  • What do you call a rugby player with a chip on his shoulder? A crisp pass!
  • Why did the rugby player go to the bank? To improve his try rate!
  • Why did the rugby ball go to school? Because it wanted to be on the ball and learn all about physics in motion!
  • What did the rugby player say when he found out he was going to be a father? “I guess I’ll be tackling diapers instead of opponents now!”
  • Why was the rugby ball late for the game? It got stuck in a ruck-us traffic!
  • What did the rugby ball say when it got kicked? “Try and catch me if you can!”
  • Why did the rugby player start a band? Because he wanted to tackle some high notes and score a hit single!
  • Why do rugby players make bad doctors? Because they always drop the patients!
  • Why did the rugby player bring a calculator to the game? So he could count all the conversions!
  • Why did the rugby player become an artist? Because he had a knack for drawing the line!
  • Why was the rugby field always so wet? Because the players always dribbled!
  • Why did the rugby team bring an alarm clock to the game? Because they didn’t want to get caught off-side!
  • What do you call a rugby player who plays with pigs? A ham-bone!
  • Why did the rugby player take up gardening? Because he wanted to tackle some bushes!
  • Why did the rugby player bring a fishing rod to the game? In case he wanted to catch the opposition offside!
  • Why do rugby players always bring an extra pair of pants? In case they get a try in their shorts!
  • Why was the rugby team’s calendar always so full? Because they had a lot of dates to tackle.
  • What do you call a rugby team full of ducks? Quack-tackles!
  • What did the rugby ball say to the player? “I get a kick out of you!”
  • Why did the rugby ball bring a snack to the game? Because it heard it was going to get kicked around a lot and wanted to have a roll!
  • Why did the rugby player bring a fire extinguisher to the game? Because he wanted to stop the opposition from getting too hot under the collar!
  • Why was the rugby coach always calm? Because he knew how to keep his players in line!
  • What do you call a baby kangaroo who plays rugby? A scrum-pet!
  • Why don’t rugby players bring snacks to the game? Because they always go for the try-ies!
  • Why did the rugby team go to the bank? To open a try-count!
  • Why did the rugby player wear a helmet to the game? Because he didn’t want to get caught in a scrum-tastrophy!
  • What do you call a rugby player who can’t find his jersey? Shirtless-tackle!
  • What did the rugby player say to the ball after it was kicked? “You’re the one I try for!”
  • What do you call a rugby player who can jump really high? A try-athlete!
  • Why don’t rugby players ever get locked out? Because they always have a key forward!
  • Why was the rugby player a terrible baker? Because he couldn’t make enough turnovers!
  • Why did the rugby player become a banker? Because they loved making try-interest!
  • Why did the rugby player bring a ladder onto the field? Because he heard the match was going to be a high tackle!
  • How do rugby players stay cool during a match? They use a fan-tackle move!
  • Why don’t rugby players go to fancy restaurants? Because they prefer to tackle their food!
  • What do you call a rugby player who can’t pass? Unbeatable… at being intercepted!
  • What did the rugby coach say to the team before the big game? “Don’t tackle life, scrum it!”
  • Why did the rugby ball turn red? Because it saw the try-line and blushed!
  • Why did the rugby team visit the bakery? Because they kneaded some extra rolls for the game!
  • Why did the rugby team always carry an extra pair of pants? In case they needed to drop-kick!
  • Why do rugby players love gardening? Because they always enjoy a good scrum-bellina!
  • Why was the rugby player always cool? Because they always kept their cool on the field!
  • Why did the rugby player always have a snack during the game? Because he didn’t want to get tackled on an empty stomach!
  • Why don’t rugby players like math? Because they prefer to score tries, not solve equations!
  • Why don’t rugby players like to break up with their girlfriends? Because they’re always afraid of being tackled!
  • Why do rugby players hate baking? Because they can’t make turnovers!
  • What did the rugby coach say when his team won the championship? “We really scrummed up the competition!”
  • What do you call a rugby player who illegally tackles? A “foul”-back!
  • Why did the rugby ball go to school? To become an educated tackle!
  • What do you call a pig who plays rugby? A pork scrum-half!
  • Why was the rugby ball always tired? Because it was constantly getting kicked!
  • Why did the rugby ball go to the bank? It wanted to get its try-angles sorted!
  • Why was the rugby player always so cold? Because he was always in the lineout!
  • Why did the rugby player bring a deck of cards to the game? In case he needed to make a try and deal with the competition!
  • Why did the rugby team bring an elephant to the game? Because it was a trunked tackle!
  • Why do rugby players make good singers? Because they know how to tackle the high notes!
  • Why don’t rugby players use smartphones? Because they prefer to pass, not text!
  • Why did the rugby ball go to the party alone? Because it wanted to have a ball all by itself!
  • Why did the rugby player go to the bank? Because he wanted to score some try-interest!
  • What do you call a rugby player who pretends to be humble? A try hard.
  • Why don’t rugby players bring umbrellas to the game? Because they prefer to tackle the rain head-on!
  • Why did the rugby player bring a pig to the game? Because he wanted to play a little piggyback rugby!
  • Why don’t rugby players like sharing their dessert? Because they’re always trying to convert the try!
  • Why did the rugby player bring a pillow to the game? Because he wanted to score a try and take a nap in the end zone!
  • What’s a rugby player’s favorite type of jewelry? A try-st on necklace!
  • Why did the rugby player become an artist? Because he knew how to draw the line in the scrum!
  • Why did the rugby player bring a suitcase to the game? Because he wanted to pack down the opposition!
  • Why was the rugby match so hot? Because all the players were tackling the heat!
  • What do you call a team of rugby-playing cows? The mooooo-ving forwards!
  • Why do rugby players make great doctors? Because they’re always ready to tackle any health problem!
  • What do you call a rugby player who can sing? A pitch perfect scrum-half!
  • Why was the rugby team always so hot? Because they always scored try-athlons!
  • What do you call a rugby player who wears two jerseys? A double-crosser!
  • Why was the rugby team so good at baking? Because they always had perfect try-s!
  • Why did the rugby player take his piggy bank to the game? Because he wanted to score some loose change!
  • Why do rugby players make good detectives? Because they always try to convert the evidence!
  • Why did the rugby player become a banker? He wanted to make sure he always had a high score!
  • Why do rugby players make great comedians? Because they always deliver the punch(line) with a tackle!
  • Why are rugby players so good at baking? Because they know how to roll the dough!
  • Why did the rugby player bring a compass to the game? Because he didn’t want to get lost in the scrum and end up in a different hemisphere!
  • Why do rugby players make good comedians? Because they’re always trying to get a good line-out!
  • Why did the rugby player bring a raincoat to the game? In case the match turned into a scrum-brella party!
  • Why did the rugby player bring a map to the game? So he could find the pitch and avoid getting tackled!
  • What do you call a rugby player who can’t stop talking? A loose mouth forward!
  • What did the rugby player say to the ball? I’ve got a lot of drive, let’s tackle this together!
  • Why did the rugby player open a bakery? Because he wanted to knead the dough and pass it with a perfect spiral!
  • Why did the rugby ball go to the doctor? Because it felt a little deflated!
  • Why did the rugby player bring a thermometer to the game? Because he wanted to check the temperature of the competition!
  • What did the rugby player say when he scored a try? “I try my best not to drop the ball!”
  • Why do rugby players make great locksmiths? Because they’re always good at tackling locks!
  • Why did the rugby player start a garden? Because he wanted to grow his own scrum-cumber!
  • Why did the rugby ball go to school? To get smarter and learn some tackle-tics!
  • How do rugby players stay cool during a match? They stand near the fans!
  • Why did the rugby player become an artist? Because he was tired of being tackled and wanted to draw the line!

 

Rugby Jokes for Kids

Rugby jokes for kids are like the thrilling, jovial moments of a rugby match – unpredictable, exciting, and guaranteed to tickle the funny bones of your little ones.

These jokes not only provide laughter but also help kids to comprehend the nuance of humor, enhancing their linguistic skills and fostering a love for one of the most exciting sports on the planet.

What’s more, Rugby jokes for kids add a dash of humor to the game, making their experiences on the field, or as spectators, even more enjoyable.

Are you prepared for some uproarious laughter?

Here are the jokes that will have your kids laughing all the way to the try line:

  • What do rugby players eat before a big match? Egg-and-try-sausage!
  • Why did the rugby player bring string to the game? In case he needed to tackle the loose ends.
  • What did the rugby player say to the football player? “I’ll tackle you any day!”
  • Why did the rugby player eat the scoreboard? Because he wanted a well-balanced diet!
  • Why was the rugby pitch always so muddy? Because the players kept dribbling the ball!
  • What do you call a rugby player with no hands or legs? Trustworthy!
  • How do you make a rugby player stop charging? Take away his credit card!
  • What did the rugby ball say to the player? “Throw me, catch me, tackle me, I’m your biggest fan.”
  • Why did the rugby player bring a suitcase to the game? In case he had to pack up and scrum away!
  • Why don’t rugby players go to the zoo? Because they can’t resist tackling the lions!
  • Why did the rugby player take a cooking class? Because he wanted to learn how to make scrum-ptious meals!
  • Why don’t rugby players bring tissues to the game? Because they already have scrums!
  • Why do rugby players never get locked out of their houses? They always have the keys to the try zone!
  • What do you call a sheep playing rugby? A woolly good player!
  • Why do rugby players make terrible librarians? Because they can’t seem to keep their books on the shelves!
  • What do you call a rugby player who opens a bakery? A try-scorer!
  • How do rugby players stay cool during the game? They always make a try to keep their cool!
  • What did one rugby ball say to the other at the start of the game? “I’ll catch you later!”
  • Why did the rugby player bring a pencil to the game? Because he wanted to draw a line for the kick-off!
  • Why was the rugby team always so sleepy? Because they always got a try in the end.
  • Why did the rugby ball go to school? Because it wanted to be a little more well-rounded!
  • What did the rugby player say to the football player? “We’re always ahead of the game!”
  • What do you call a rugby player with lots of pets? A scrum master.
  • What do you call a rugby player who only eats vegetables? A prop-corn!
  • What did the rugby player do when he caught a cold? He gave it a good ruck!
  • Why did the rugby player bring a glass of water onto the field? So he could have a try!
  • Why did the rugby ball go to school? To get a little more “kick” out of life!
  • What do you call a rugby player who goes on a diet? A quarter pounder!
  • What do you call a rugby player with a broken leg? A hop forward!
  • Why was the rugby team so good at gardening? Because they know how to tackle the shrubs!
  • What is a rugby player’s favorite type of music? Heavy tackle!
  • What do you call a rugby player with flowers in his hair? A try-athlete!
  • What do you call a rugby player with a pet bird? A fly-half!
  • Why did the rugby ball go to school? To improve its passing grades!
  • Why was the rugby field so muddy? Because the players keep passing the buck.
  • What do rugby players wear on a rainy day? Their tackle jackets!
  • Why did the rugby player bring a whistle to the game? Because he wanted to make some try-iffic noise!
  • Why did the rugby team go to the bank? They wanted to improve their tackles!
  • Why do rugby players like to watch movies? Because they enjoy a good tackle-horror film!
  • What do rugby players eat before a game? They have a scrumm-licious meal!
  • Why did the rugby player become a chef? Because he wanted to score with a try-fle cake!
  • Why did the rugby player eat his homework? Because his teacher said it was a scrum-ptious assignment!
  • Why did the rugby player go to the bakery? Because he heard they had great turnovers!
  • What did the rugby player say to his opponent who was hogging the ball? “Give it a try!”
  • Why did the rugby player bring a suitcase to the game? Because they heard they might need to pack a try!
  • What do rugby players do when they get cold? They try to get their hands on the ball to warm them up!
  • Why do rugby players do well in school? Because they know how to tackle their subjects!
  • Why are rugby players terrible singers? Because they’re always offside!
  • Why did the rugby player take a nap during the game? He was tired of running try after try!
  • Why was the rugby game at the zoo so wild? Because the rucks were full of animals!
  • What do you call a rugby player who dances? The try-line dancer!
  • Why don’t rugby players do well in math? Because they always try to convert the wrong numbers!
  • What do you call a rugby player who sits on the bench? A sub-woofer!
  • What did the rugby player say when he won the lottery? “Try, try, try again!”
  • What do you call a rugby player who has no manners? A rough player!
  • Why don’t rugby players bring snacks to the game? Because they can always find a good scrum-diddly-umptious meal after!
  • What do you call it when two rugby players collide? A try-athlon!
  • Why don’t rugby players bring umbrellas to games? Because they prefer to catch the high balls instead.
  • Why did the rugby ball go to the library? It wanted to catch up on its reading tackles!
  • What do you call a rugby player who gets a haircut? A try-mmer!
  • What do you call a rugby player who goes to medical school? A “doc” ruck!
  • What do rugby players wear on their heads? Try-angles!
  • What do you call a rugby player who makes a lot of noise? A try-umphant!
  • Why did the rugby player go to the bakery? To get a little extra roll!
  • Why did the rugby player bring a ruler to the match? Because he wanted to measure up to the competition!
  • Why are rugby players good at math? They know how to tackle numbers!
  • Why do rugby players do well in school? Because they’re used to tackling difficult subjects!
  • Why was the rugby team’s barbecue so lousy? Because they couldn’t make a good grill conversion!
  • What do you call a rugby player who can jump higher than a house? A leaperback!
  • Why are rugby players so strong? Because they always “try” their best!
  • What do you call a rugby player who makes bad decisions? A forward pass!
  • What do you get if you cross a rugby player with a pig? A lot of broken tackles!
  • What do you call a rugby player who never passes the ball? A selfish pass-ter!
  • Why do rugby players love math? Because they always try to score a try-angle!
  • What do rugby players use to clean their jerseys? Scrum-bles!
  • Why did the rugby ball go to the library? It wanted to learn how to tackle the Dewey decimal system.
  • What do you call a rugby player who can’t stop eating? A scrum-diddly-umptious!
  • Why was the rugby ball so full of hot air? Because it was always talking about itself!
  • What do you get when you cross a rugby player with a squirrel? Running rugby!
  • Why did the rugby player bring a math book to the game? Because they wanted to tackle some numbers!
  • Why was the rugby field so dusty? Because the players always try to score a try!
  • What do you get if you mix a rugby player with a magician? A prop-illusionist!

 

Rugby Jokes for Adults

Who said the rugby field was only for rough and tumble?

Rugby jokes for adults bring together the thrill of the game and the sharpness of wit, creating a hilarious blend that is as unpredictable as a rugby match itself.

Just like a classic scrum, these jokes pack a punch of humor, intellect, and a hint of mischief that will surely leave you chuckling.

Perfect for after-match gatherings, rugby viewing parties, or simply to add a dash of humor to a conversation among sports enthusiasts.

Here are some rugby jokes that are sure to score a try with adults:

  • Why don’t rugby players ever get sunburned? Because they always stay in the shade… under the try line!
  • Why was the rugby player a terrible dancer? Because he couldn’t find his rhythm on the pitch!
  • Why did the rugby player become a musician? Because he loved playing in the back-line and scoring some notes!
  • Why did the rugby coach go to the bank? He needed to make a “try”-deposit for the team’s success!
  • Why did the rugby player bring a map to the game? In case he needed to tackle the opposition all over the field!
  • Why did the rugby player bring a shovel to the game? Because he wanted to dig deep and find victory!
  • Why did the rugby player bring a GPS to the game? So he could navigate his way through the opponents’ defense!
  • Why don’t rugby players ever get married? Because they’re always getting tackled!
  • What do you get if you cross a rugby player with a musician? A try-athlete!
  • Why don’t rugby players bring umbrellas to the game? Because there’s always a try on!
  • What did the rugby ball say to the player? “Throw me around, I love being kicked!”
  • Why did the rugby player bring a suitcase full of books to the game? In case he needed to tackle the opposition intellectually!
  • Why don’t rugby players ever shop at the dollar store? Because they prefer tackling bargains!
  • Why did the rugby team go to the art gallery? They wanted to see some great tackles!
  • Why do rugby players love math? Because they know how to convert tries into points!
  • What do you call a group of rugby players in a hot tub? A scrum-bath!
  • Why did the rugby player bring a pig to the game? Because he heard they were playing a scrum-tious match!
  • What do rugby players do when they can’t find their ball? They try to tackle the problem!
  • Why did the rugby team bring a ladder to the game? To reach their highest tries!
  • What did the rugby player say when he scored a try? “I’m just getting a kick out of it!”
  • Why don’t rugby players like math? Because they can’t seem to convert!
  • Why was the rugby player a great dancer? Because he had great footwork on and off the field!
  • Why did the rugby player bring a pencil to the game? In case he needed to draw a line of scrimmage!
  • Why did the rugby player go to the bakery? He wanted to get his hands on some turnovers!
  • What did the rugby coach say to the losing team? “Don’t worry, it’s just a try-umph of the opposition!”
  • Why did the rugby team start a gardening business? They had a knack for planting tackles!
  • Why did the rugby player always carry a pen and paper? So he could draw up the perfect play on the field!
  • Why did the rugby team hire a mathematician? They needed someone to calculate all their “try”-angles!
  • Why don’t rugby players ever eat cereal? They’re too used to tackling and prefer a full meal!
  • Why did the rugby team go to the restaurant after the game? Because they wanted to tackle a big meal!
  • What do rugby players use to fix their cars? Tackle boxes!
  • Why did the rugby player bring a notebook to the game? So he could take notes on how to tackle his opponents!
  • What did the rugby coach say to the lazy player? “If you don’t want to tackle, at least try to ruck and roll!”
  • Why did the rugby team go to the bakery after the game? They wanted to get their just desserts!
  • Why did the rugby player bring a car door to the game? So he could open up opportunities!
  • Why did the rugby player become an architect? Because he was great at designing tackles!
  • Why did the rugby team hire a chef? Because they needed someone to tackle the soufflés!
  • What do you call a rugby player who can play the piano? A grand-slam pianist!
  • What did the rugby player say to his doctor? “Doc, I keep getting tackled on the field.” The doctor replied, “Sounds like a case of rugby-osis!”
  • Why do rugby players make good thieves? Because they’re experts at taking the ball and running!
  • Why did the rugby player bring a deck of cards to the game? In case they needed a game of 52-yard pickup!
  • Why do rugby players make great detectives? Because they always follow the line of try!
  • What did the coach say to the rugby player who was always late? “You better shape up or you’ll get benched!”
  • Why do rugby players never invest in stocks? Because they’re always in a scrum!
  • Why did the rugby team go to the bakery? They heard there were some great rolls and buns there!
  • Why do rugby players make great detectives? Because they excel at tackling suspects!
  • What do rugby players have in common with pirates? They both love a good hook!
  • Why did the rugby player refuse to play in the circus? Because he didn’t want to be tackled by a clown!
  • Why did the rugby team go to the circus? Because they wanted to tackle the lion tamers!
  • Why was the rugby team so bad at math? They always got tackled by numbers!
  • Why do rugby players make terrible gardeners? Because they always try to tackle the weeds instead of pulling them!
  • Why did the rugby team hire a mathematician? They wanted to calculate the probability of winning the game!
  • Why did the rugby team always win at poker? They were experts at bluffing and tackling their opponents!
  • Why did the rugby player bring a clock to the game? Because he wanted to play overtime and make it a real rugby match!
  • Why did the rugby team go to the bank? They wanted to open a savings account for all the penalties they earned!
  • Why did the rugby player wear two pairs of pants to the game? In case he got a pair of tries!
  • Why did the rugby player bring a fan to the game? Because he wanted to stay cool under pressure!
  • Why do rugby players never invest in stocks? Because they prefer to tackle bonds!
  • Why did the rugby player bring his pet rabbit to the game? Because he heard they were going to have a scrum-hop!
  • Why did the rugby player bring a knife to the game? Because he wanted to cut through the defense!
  • What do you call a rugby team full of babies? The Little Ruckers!
  • What’s the difference between a rugby player and a philosopher? A philosopher only thinks, while a rugby player thinks and tackles!
  • Why don’t rugby players like gardening? Because they always get tackled by the lawnmower!
  • Why did the rugby player join the circus? He wanted to tackle the big top!
  • What do rugby players do when they can’t find their favorite jersey? They tackle their laundry pile instead!
  • Why do rugby players never get lost? Because they always know which way the try line is!
  • Why did the rugby player bring a glass of water to the game? He heard it was a scrum-diddly-umptious match!
  • What do you call a rugby player with a year’s worth of dirty laundry? A stinkin’ hooker!
  • Why did the rugby team start a band? Because they wanted to be known for their try-umphs on and off the field!
  • Why do rugby players make terrible comedians? Because their jokes always end up being a drop ball!
  • Why was the rugby player so good at math? Because he could always find the angle for the perfect kick!
  • What do you call a rugby player who gets all the attention? A try-hard!
  • Why did the rugby player bring a GPS to the game? He wanted to make sure he was always on track for the try line!
  • Why do rugby players make great chefs? Because they know how to cook up a mean scrum!
  • Why did the rugby player open a bakery? Because he wanted to make scrum-diddly-umptious turnovers!
  • Why did the rugby player bring a deck of cards to the game? So he could shuffle the defense!
  • Why did the rugby player bring a glass of water to the game? Because he heard there would be a lot of tries!
  • Why don’t rugby players ever win at poker? Because they always fold in the scrum!
  • Why did the rugby ball go to school? To get better grades in try-outs!
  • Why did the rugby player bring a chicken to the game? Because he heard it was good at winging it!
  • Why was the rugby pitch always so muddy? Because the players were always getting tackled down to Earth!
  • Why don’t rugby players drink tea? Because the proper way to have a cuppa is to tackle it!
  • Why was the rugby team’s bus so small? Because every player had their own scrum-half!
  • Why was the rugby player a great chef? Because he knew how to make a mean scrumlette!
  • Why don’t rugby players need a fancy dinner party? They already know how to tackle any situation!
  • Why did the rugby team go to the bank? To get their forwards in order!
  • Why was the rugby ball sent to detention? It was caught being a little ruck-us!
  • Why did the rugby player bring his dog to the game? Because he wanted to show off his ruck rover!
  • Why don’t rugby players ever go broke? Because they always make a try-umph return!
  • Why did the rugby player become an artist? He loved painting the try lines!
  • Why don’t rugby players make good comedians? Because their jokes always end in a forward pass!
  • Why don’t rugby players ever shop at the bakery? Because they can’t resist the turnovers!
  • Why was the rugby match at the bakery so intense? It was a real bread and butter match!
  • Why did the rugby player bring a shovel to the game? So he could dig deep in defense!
  • Why do rugby players make great astronauts? Because they know how to handle a scrum in zero gravity!
  • Why did the rugby player bring a pillow to the game? In case he needed to tackle someone and make them comfortable!
  • What did the rugby player say when he scored a try? “I can’t believe I touched down on cloud nine!”
  • Why did the rugby team bring a ladder to the match? Their coach told them to try high tackles!
  • Why did the rugby player become a doctor? He wanted to be an expert in scrum-atology!
  • Why did the rugby team hire a meteorologist? To predict if there’ll be any line-outs!
  • Why was the rugby team’s mascot always so happy? Because he loved being a try-celebration bear!
  • Why don’t rugby players take up gardening? They always get tackled!
  • What did the rugby player say when he scored a try? “I’ve got this game locked down, I’m really trying my best!”
  • Why don’t rugby players shower before the game? Because they don’t want to wash their tackles!
  • Why did the rugby player go to art school? He wanted to learn how to draw a perfect lineout!
  • Why did the rugby player bring a weightlifting belt to the game? He wanted to ensure he was “try”-ing his best!
  • Why did the rugby player bring a pillow to the game? So he could take a quick nap during halftime!
  • Why did the rugby player bring a shovel to the match? He heard they were going to be digging deep for the win!
  • What did the rugby ball say to the player? “Throw me around, but don’t drop me!”
  • Why do rugby players love gardening? Because they can tackle the weeds and maul the grass!
  • What do you call a rugby player with a broken arm and leg? A bloody good start!
  • Why did the rugby player bring a deck of cards to the game? Because he knew how to shuffle the defense and deal with the competition!
  • Why did the rugby player go to the bank? To try and score some interest!

 

Rugby Joke Generator

Scrumming up the perfect rugby joke can often feel like being caught in a ruck.

(Could you tackle that pun?)

That’s where our FREE Rugby Joke Generator comes into play.

Engineered to combine witty puns, scrum-azing humor, and spirited phrases, it produces jokes that are guaranteed to set off a try-umph of laughter.

Don’t let your humor get kicked into touch.

Use our joke generator to create jokes that are as fresh and thrilling as a last-minute drop goal.

 

FAQs About Rugby Jokes

Why are rugby jokes so popular?

Rugby jokes are popular because they add a touch of humor to a game that is known for its intensity and rough play.

They allow fans, players, and spectators to bond over shared experiences and playful ribbing, making the sport even more enjoyable.

 

Can rugby jokes help in social situations?

Definitely!

Sharing a rugby joke is a great way to break the ice in social situations, especially in a crowd that enjoys sports.

These jokes can foster camaraderie, lighten the mood, or inject a bit of fun into the conversation.

 

How can I come up with my own rugby jokes?

  1. Understand the game of rugby, its rules, and common terms. Jokes often arise from the quirks and characteristics of the sport.
  2. Think about the stereotypes and common traits of rugby players. These can be great fodder for humor.
  3. Reflect on the scenario or setting of your joke. Are you poking fun at a training session, a particularly tough match, or a famous player? Tailor your humor to match this vibe.
  4. Take a well-known saying or phrase and twist it to include rugby elements.
  5. Embrace puns and wordplay. Rugby offers plenty of opportunities for clever puns and linguistic creativity.

 

Are there any tips for remembering rugby jokes?

Relate rugby jokes to the situations in which they might be used—watching a game, participating in training, or chatting with fellow rugby enthusiasts.

Associating jokes with these moments can help you remember them.

 

How can I make my rugby jokes better?

The key lies in the element of surprise and a good understanding of the game.

The more you know about rugby, the more material you have to work with.

Don’t be afraid to play with words and experiment with puns.

Practicing your jokes will also help you refine them.

 

How does the Rugby Joke Generator work?

Our Rugby Joke Generator is a tool that helps you create rugby-themed jokes instantly.

Simply enter keywords related to your humor or situation, and press the Generate Jokes button.

In no time, you’ll have a list of hilarious rugby jokes ready to share.

 

Is the Rugby Joke Generator free?

Yes, our Rugby Joke Generator is absolutely free to use!

You can generate as many jokes as you want to keep your conversations lively and entertaining.

So go ahead, start cracking those rugby jokes and bring some humor to the field.

 

Conclusion

Rugby jokes are a lively way to add a little kick to everyday conversations, making life a bit more enjoyable with each chuckle.

From the quick and witty to the long and rib-tickling, there’s a rugby joke for every occasion.

So next time you’re watching a rugby match, remember, there’s humor to be found in every tackle, try, and turnover.

Keep sharing the laughs, and let the good times scrum and roll.

Because after all, a day without laughter is like a day without rugby—unimaginable and, frankly, a bit less thrilling.

Happy joking, everyone!

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