252 Tomato Jokes for Punny Veggie Lovers

If you’ve found this page, it means you’re ripe and ready to plunge into the world of tomato jokes.

These aren’t just any jokes, but the pick of the vine.

That’s why we’ve harvested a batch of the most hilarious tomato jokes.

From saucy puns to juicy one-liners, our collection has a joke for every facet of life.

So, let’s dive into the tangy core of tomato humor, one joke at a time.

Contents show

Tomato Jokes

Tomato jokes are a juicy blend of humor that will get your laughter flowing like tomato sauce on a hot pizza.

These jokes aren’t just about the humble fruit (yes, fruit!) itself, but also about the countless ways tomatoes are used in our daily lives.

Whether it’s a slice in a burger, the main ingredient in a salsa, or the base of a hearty marinara, tomatoes are all around us.

And this ubiquity provides plenty of scope for comedy.

A well-crafted tomato joke requires a pinch of pun, a dash of absurdity, and a healthy serving of the unexpected.

From their vibrant red color to the ongoing debate about whether they’re a fruit or a vegetable, tomatoes are a hotbed of hilarious possibilities.

Ready to ketchup with some laughter?

Get ready for a ripe old time with these tomato jokes:

What do you call a tomato that is trying to be a detective? Sherlock Tomato!
Why did the tomato turn green? Because it was jealous of the cucumber’s coolness!
Why did the tomato turn down the job offer? It didn’t want to get squashed in the corporate world!
Why did the tomato go out with a corn cob? Because they were a-maize-ing together!
What do you get when you squeeze a tomato? Tomato juice, and a very confused tomato!
What do you get when you cross a tomato with a comedian? A tomato that’s a real funny-peeler!
Why did the tomato turn to the carrot? It needed a little pep-tomato-n!
Why was the tomato blushing? Because it saw the salad dressing’s French kiss!
What did the tomato say to the lettuce on their wedding day? Lettuce celebrate our love!
What do you call a tomato that’s been run over by a car? Salsa!
Why was the tomato so good at tennis? It had great net skills!
What did the tomato say to the refrigerator? “Tom-ay-to, tom-ah-to, just don’t squash me!”
Why was the tomato blushing? Because it saw the other tomatoes in their skin-tight outfits!
What’s a tomato’s favorite dance move? The Ketch-up!
What do you call a tomato that is trying to catch some Z’s? A sleepy tomato!
What did the tomato say to the pickle? You really relish my jokes!
What did the tomato say to the onion when they were running late? We better ketchup!
Why did the tomato turn yellow? Because it saw the banana split!
What do you get when you cross a tomato with a comedian? A lot of good puns and a few ripe jokes!
How do you know when a tomato is smiling? When it’s saucing!
What is a tomato’s favorite type of clothing? Ketch-up and mustard!
What did the tomato say to the grape? “Stop being such a raisin!”
Why did the tomato turn to the cucumber? It wanted to see if they could pickles it!
What is a tomato’s favorite game? Ketchup!
Why did the tomato turn down the invitation to the party? It couldn’t find a decent pair of salsa shoes!
What do you call a tomato that’s been hit by a truck? Ketchup!
What did the tomato say when it crossed the road? “Ketchup!”
Why was the tomato all alone at the party? Because it couldn’t find a date!
What do you call a tomato that is a big fan of the Beatles? A Fab Four-ganizer!
Why did the tomato turn to the mushroom for advice? Because it was a fungi to hang out with!
What did the tomato say to the lettuce? You’re making me turn red with envy!
What did the tomato say to the corn? “I’m a real vegetable, unlike you, corny!”
What did the tomato say to the cucumber at the party? “You’re looking sharp tonight!”
What’s a tomato’s favorite game? Ketchup!
Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the farmer’s sun-dried underwear!
Why did the tomato turn to its friend and say, “I’m so juicy”? It had just been squeezed into a bottle of ketchup!
What do you call a tomato that’s a spy? An undercover agent-ree!
Why did the tomato turn down the invitation to the party? It didn’t want to get sauced!
What’s red and goes up and down? A tomato in an elevator!
Why did the tomato go to the spa? It needed to relax and ketchup on some beauty sleep!

Short Tomato Jokes

Short tomato jokes are like a freshly sliced tomato—bright, juicy, and bursting with flavor.

These jokes are perfect for a quick giggle during a text chat, a charming addition to your social media captions, or the icebreaker you need at a gathering.

The allure of short tomato jokes lies in their ability to be both humorous and concise, delivering chuckles in just a handful of words.

And now, let’s ketchup to comedy!

Here are short tomato jokes that deliver a hearty laugh in just a few words.

What do you call a tomato that’s been smoking? A hot tamale!
What did the tomato say to the mushroom? You’re a fungi!
What do you call a tomato with superhero powers? A super fruit!
What did the tomato say to the cucumber? Let’s ketchup sometime!
What do you call a tomato that’s a good singer? Adele-sauce!
What’s a tomato’s favorite sport? Ketch-up ball!
What did the tomato say to the tomato sauce? You’re saucy!
What’s a tomato’s favorite song? Can’t ketchup with me!
Why did the tomato turn green? Because it was unripe with envy!
What’s a tomato’s favorite type of movie? A suspense-thriller!
What did the tomato say to the corn? Nothing, tomatoes can’t talk!
What’s a tomato’s favorite part of a sandwich? The ketchup!
What do you call a tomato that is playing hide-and-seek? Ketchup!
What did the big tomato say to the little tomato? Catch up!
Why did the tomato blush? It accidentally touched the hot salsa!
What do you call a tomato that’s been crying? A saucy tomato!

Tomato Jokes One-Liners

Tomato jokes in the form of one-liners are the epitome of humor squeezed into a single sentence.

They’re the verbal equivalent of a ripe, juicy tomato bursting with flavor – unexpected, delightful, and irresistibly appealing.

Crafting a good one-liner demands a blend of originality, timing, and a deep love for the art of puns.

The challenge lies in packing the set-up and punchline into a concise yet potent form, delivering an explosive laugh with just a few words.

Here’s hoping these tomato one-liners find you bursting with giggles:

Why did the tomato start a band? Because it had great jam sessions!
I can’t trust tomatoes. They can’t keep a secret. They always spill the beans.
I asked my tomato plant if it needed anything, and it replied, “I’m just a little vine.”>
Why don’t tomatoes ever get into arguments? Because they always ketchup!
I tried to make a tomato laugh, but it just couldn’t ketchup with my sense of humor!
I asked the tomato if it wanted to ketchup, but it just couldn’t relish the idea.
I told my friend I was growing tomatoes, but he thought I said tornadoes. Now he thinks I’m a storm chaser!
I threw a tomato at the chef. It was a saucy move!
I asked my tomato plant if it wanted to go on a vacation, but it said it couldn’t because it’s too saucy.
Why was the tomato so good at playing hide-and-seek? Because it could always ketchup!
What do you get when you cross a tomato with a vampire? A tomato that is bloody delicious!
Why did the tomato turn to the mushroom for advice? It wanted to find some sage wisdom!
Why did the tomato turn beet-red? Because it saw the salad dressing, and it couldn’t ketchup with it!
Why did the tomato go to the casino? Because it wanted to play “ketch-up” with its friends!
I told my tomato plant a joke, but it just went over its head. It’s not very bright, you know?
What do you call a tomato that is sad? A blueberry in disguise!
I’m friends with a tomato, but I can never trust it with a secret. It always spills the beans!
I asked my tomato plant if it needed any pruning, and it said, “Naah, I’m vine!”
Why did the tomato turn yellow? Because it was ripe!
I asked my tomato plant if it wanted a little salsa, but it said it wasn’t in the mood for a dip.
How did the tomato propose to the lettuce? He got down on one knee and said, “Lettuce get married!”
What do you call a tomato that is a drama queen? A melodramato!
I heard the tomato was feeling saucy, but it turned out it was just sun-dried.
What did the tomato say to the lettuce? Lettuce ketchup and make a salad!
What’s the tomato’s favorite song? “Can’t Stop the Peeling”!
Why did the tomato go to school? Because it wanted to become a smart ketchup!
Why did the tomato turn into a superhero? Because it wanted to fight crime and ketchup on all the villains!
Why did the tomato go to the art gallery? Because it wanted to ketchup on some culture!
What did the tomato say to the refrigerator? “Close the door, I’m dressing!”
I heard the tomato went to the seafood party, but it didn’t shrimp in salsa.
Why did the tomato turn blue? Because it couldn’t catch its breath!
I told my tomato plant a joke, but it didn’t laugh. It just turned red with embarrassment.
I asked the tomato if it was a fruit or a vegetable. It said, “I’m a tomato, but I identify as a smoothie.”>
Why did the tomato turn into a superhero? Because it had special powers – it could ketchup to anything!
What did the tomato say to the lettuce in the race? “Lettuce ketchup!”
What did the tomato say to the onion? You crack me up, onion-ly if you knew how much I dig you!
Did you hear about the tomato that got into a fight? It got squashed!
What did the mother tomato say to her disobedient child? “You need to ketchup on your behavior!”
Why was the tomato blushing? Because it saw the salad dressing without its clothes on!
I used to hate tomatoes, but then I realized they’re just trying to ketchup with the other veggies.
Why did the tomato go to the doctor? Because it had a bad case of the blues!
What did the tomato say to the corn? Ketchup, we’re in a jam!
What did one tomato say to the other tomato during their race? “Ketchup if you can!”
What do you call a tomato that’s been punched? A pulp fiction!
I invited the tomato to a comedy show, but it said it would only come if it could be the punchline!
Why did the tomato get thrown out of the salad? It couldn’t keep its cool!
What do you call a tomato that’s gone bad? A rotten tomato!
I tried to make a tomato pun, but it just didn’t ketchup.
Why did the tomato go to the library? It wanted to find a good book to ketchup on its reading!
I accidentally swallowed a tomato seed, and now I’m worried a tomato might grow inside me. I’m feeling pretty saucy about it!
Why did the tomato go to the party? Because it couldn’t find a better place to ketchup!
What did the tomato say to the cherry tomato? “You’re just a little tomato-ey!”
I accidentally swallowed a whole tomato. It’s okay, I’ll just wait for it to ketchup!
Did you hear about the tomato who went out with a prune? They had a plum tomato relationship!
Why don’t tomatoes ever get lonely? Because they hang out in bunches!
Why did the tomato go to the gym? Because it wanted to get saucy and squeeze some juice!
Why did the tomato go to the party? Because it was a saucial event!
Why did the tomato turn to the cucumber for support? It wanted to find a good vine to lean on!
What do you call a tomato with a sunburn? A little red ripe!
I asked the tomato if it wanted to play catch. It said, “No, I’m a ketchup!”
I told my wife she should stop eating so many tomatoes. She said, “Don’t worry, it’s just a little crush!”

Tomato Dad Jokes

Tomato dad jokes are a ripe selection of humor that perfectly marinate puns and laughter, guaranteed to make anyone roll their eyes and chuckle simultaneously.

These are the type of jokes that are so cheesy, they’re actually great.

Perfect for entertaining at barbecues, sparking lively dinner table discussions, or just to ketchup with someone and make them smile.

Get ready for a hearty serving of laughter with a side of groans.

Here are some tomato dad jokes that are bound to hit the funny bone:

What did the tomato say to the other vegetables at the party? Let’s ketchup later!
Why did the tomato turn red? Because it accidentally walked into the salsa club!
What did the baby tomato say to the mama tomato? “I’m just a little ‘saucy’!”
Why did the tomato turn to the lemon? Because it couldn’t find a better squeeze!
Why do tomatoes never get into a fight? Because they know how to ketchup with each other!
Why did the tomato get in trouble? Because it was squashing its sibling!
Why did the tomato go out with a hot pepper? Because it couldn’t resist the spice!
Why did the tomato turn to his friend for help? Because he felt sauced in his current situation!
Why was the tomato always smiling? Because it had great “vine”tage!
What did the mother tomato say to the baby tomato? “Ketchup!”
How did the tomato feel after running a marathon? Sauced and exhausted!
What do you call a tomato that’s been sunbathing for too long? A tomato-skin!
What did the baby tomato say to the mama tomato while crossing the road? Ketchup!
What did the mama tomato say to the baby tomato during a family walk? “Ketchup!”
Why was the tomato sad? Because it felt sauced and couldn’t ketchup!
Why did the tomato turn to the cucumber? Because it couldn’t ketchup to the lettuce!
What do you call a tomato that is pretending to be a carrot? A tomato in disguise!
Why did the tomato turn down the lettuce’s invitation? It didn’t want to end up in a jam!
What do you call a tomato that’s scared to jump off a cliff? A chicken tomato!
What do you call a tomato that’s a detective? Sherlock Pomodoro!
How do you fix a cracked tomato? With tomato paste!
What did the tomato say to the lettuce? You can’t kale me, I’m too tough!
How did the tomato turn its life around? It decided to “ketchup” on all its goals!
Why was the tomato on the computer? Because it wanted to keep up with the latest “vine” trends!
Why did the tomato turn to the potato? Because it wanted to be a French fry!
Why did the tomato turn into a superhero? Because it wanted to save the day as the “Caped Crusader”!
What did the tomato say to the salad? “Lettuce be friends!”
What do you get when you cross a tomato with a vampire? A tomato that goes ketchup in the night!
How do you make a tomato stop rolling? You tell it to catch up!
What did one tomato say to the other tomato at the party? You look saucy tonight!
What do you get when you cross a tomato with a vampire? A tomato that goes “Bluice!” instead of “Boo!”
What did one tomato say to the other tomato at the grocery store? “You go ahead, I’ll ketchup!”
Why did the tomato turn to the camera? Because it saw someone ketchuping!
Why did the tomato turn red? Because it was embarrassed to be seen with a vegetable like cauliflower!
Why did the tomato turn to his friend and say, “You’re a real vine friend!” Because friendship is souper important!
Why did the tomato turn to the lettuce? Because it wanted to see if it could make a salad dressing!
Why did the tomato turn to the lettuce for help? Because it had “lettuce experience” in a pickle!
What did one tomato say to the other tomato that was struggling to keep up? Ketchup, you’re too slow!
Why did the tomato turn to the tomato paste? Because it couldn’t find tomato sauce!
What do you call a tomato that is trying to catch a glimpse of something? A see-der tomato!

Tomato Jokes for Kids

Tomato jokes for kids are the cherries on top of the joke world—witty, vibrant, and always leaving kids in fits of laughter.

These jokes allow children to engage with language and appreciate the hilarity in puns and wordplay, cultivating a sense of humor that’s as juicy as the fruit itself.

Moreover, tomato jokes for kids have the additional perk of making healthy eating enjoyable, transforming that red sphere in their salad into a subject of amusement.

Ready for some rib-tickling fun?

Here are the jokes that’ll have them laughing out loud over their tomato soup:

What’s a tomato’s favorite TV show? The Big Tomato Theory!
What do you get when you cross a tomato and a clock? A tomato that’s always running out of time!
Why did the tomato turn to its friend? Because it saw the tomato sauce and said, “Ketchup with you later!”
Why did the tomato go out dancing? Because it had some great moves!
Why was the tomato sad? Because it couldn’t ketchup with the rest of the vegetables!
What did the tomato say to the cucumber at the salad bar? You’re looking vine today!
What did the tomato say to the corn during their argument? You’re just a-MAIZE-ing!
What’s the tomato’s favorite type of math? Tomato-metry!
Why did the tomato turn to the other tomato and say, “Catch up”? Because it was running out of juice!
Why did the tomato turn green? Because it was waiting for the traffic light to turn red!
Why did the tomato go to school? To get a little “tomato” education!
Why did the tomato turn red? Because it was embarrassed to be seen in the produce section!
What do you call a tomato that’s always on time? Punctual tomato!
Why did the tomato go to the party? Because it wanted to catch up with all the veggies!
What did the tomato say to the banana? “You need to ketchup!”
What did the tomato say to the cucumber at the party? Let’s ketchup later and relish this moment!
What’s small, red, and whispers? A hoarse tomato!
What do you call a tomato with superpowers? A pulp fiction!

Tomato Jokes for Adults

Who says a good tomato joke is meant only for kids?

Tomato jokes for adults are a delightful blend of clever wit, high-brow humor, and a hint of naughtiness.

Like a well-seasoned tomato soup, these jokes mix elements of humor, intellect, and a sprinkle of audaciousness that leaves an unforgettable taste of laughter.

These jokes are ideal for cocktail parties, barbecues, or simply to break the ice during a gathering among friends.

Here are some tomato jokes that are absolutely fresh and juicy for adults:

What did one tomato say to the other tomato during a race? “Ketchup, you’re falling behind!”
What did one tomato say to the other tomato in a heated argument? You better ketchup with reality!
Why did the tomato turn to the mushroom? Because he couldn’t find anyone else to ketchup with!
Why did the tomato go to the spa? It needed to relax and take a sauce!
Why did the tomato turn down a date with the cucumber? It thought the cucumber was a bit too pickled!
Why did the tomato turn down the marriage proposal? It wasn’t ready to take the plunge!
What did the tomato say to the onion when they were stuck in traffic? Don’t worry, we’ll ketchup with everyone soon!
What did the tomato say to the cucumber during their basketball game? “You can’t touch my tomatoes!”
Why did the tomato turn down the marriage proposal? It didn’t want to be tied down to one vine!
Why did the tomato turn into a superhero? Because it wanted to save the world from bad salsa!
Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing in its birthday suit!
Why was the tomato blushing? It saw the lettuce in its salad and got all hot and steamy!
What did the tomato say to the grape? “You’re too young to be in this sauce!”
Why was the tomato always quiet? Because it couldn’t ketchup with the conversation!
Why did the tomato go out with a cornstalk? Because it found it very a-maize-ing!
Why did the tomato turn to the lettuce? Because it wanted a romaine-tic relationship!
How did the tomato propose to the lettuce? With a vine ring!
Why did the tomato turn to the cucumber for help? Because it needed a good “pickle” line!
Why did the tomato turn to the mushroom? It wanted to hear some fungi jokes!
Why did the tomato go to the doctor? Because it wasn’t feeling well and needed a checkup!
What did the tomato say to the lettuce? “Lettuce ketchup so I can ketchup!”
Why was the tomato blushing? Because it saw the vegetable peeler!
Why don’t tomatoes ever get into trouble? Because they know how to ketchup!
What did the tomato say to the onion? Stop crying, we’re in this sauce together!
What do you call a tomato that is a great dancer? A salsa superstar!
Why did the tomato get in trouble? It couldn’t ketchup with all the bad jokes it made!
What do you get when you cross a tomato with a comedian? A lot of saucy punchlines!
Why did the tomato turn down the lettuce’s proposal? It couldn’t ketchup to the commitment!
What did the tomato say to the salad dressing? “Lettuce ketchup, I’m feeling saucy!”
What did the tomato say to the onion at the vegetable party? “You’re a-peeling!”
Why did the tomato go to the art exhibit? It wanted to see some abstract ketchup!
What did the tomato say when it saw the lettuce? Lettuce be friends!
Why did the tomato get in trouble? It couldn’t ketchup with the rest of the vegetables!
Why did the tomato turn down the job offer? It didn’t relish the thought of working in a can!
What did the tomato say to the cucumber? Stop being a pick(le) on me!
Why was the tomato blushing? It saw the garlic and onion flirting in the pantry!
What did the tomato say to the onion? “You’re making me cry, onion!”
Why did the tomato turn into a superhero? Because it couldn’t ketchup with the villains!
What do you call a tomato that is afraid of the dark? A scaredy-sauce!
Why did the tomato turn to the dark side? It couldn’t resist the temptation of becoming a ketch-vader!
What do you get when you cross a tomato and a comedian? A “tomato” that tells funny jokes!
Why did the tomato turn into a superstar? Because it had great ketchup-tential!
Why was the tomato so good at telling jokes? Because it knew how to “ketchup” with the punchlines!
What did the tomato say to the celery during an argument? “I’m not going to stew over this!”
Why did the tomato turn down a date with the cucumber? It couldn’t ketchup with its pickles!
What did one tomato say to the other tomato after they bumped into each other? “Sorry, I didn’t mean to get saucy!”
What did the tomato say to the hot pepper? You make me feel jalapeño business!
Why did the tomato become a singer? It wanted to be a saucy diva!
Why did the tomato go to the doctor? It had a lot of aches and ketchups!
What do you call a tomato that’s been running for a long time? Tomato paste!
Why did the tomato turn down the job offer? Because it couldn’t “ketchup” with the workload!
Why did the tomato go out with a prune? Because it couldn’t find a date for the promenade!
Why did the tomato go to the game? It wanted to catch a fly ball!
Why did the tomato go to the party? Because it couldn’t resist the salsa music!
Why did the tomato go to the gym? To work on its sauce-les!
Why was the tomato blushing? Because it saw the bottle of ketchup undressing!
Why was the tomato jealous of the banana? Because it always went bananas for attention!
Why was the tomato mad at the refrigerator? It kept putting the squeeze on it!
Why was the tomato not feeling well? It had too many bad seeds in its life!
Why was the tomato jealous of the carrot? Because the carrot was always getting picked first!
Why was the tomato sitting in the corner? Because it saw the tomato sauce!
What did the tomato say to the celery? “Stop stalking me, you’re making me tomato-red!”
Why did the tomato turn to the mushroom for advice? It was feeling saucy and needed some seasoned guidance!
Why was the tomato blushing? It saw the salad dressing… and it was a hot Italian!
What did the tomato say to the onion at the party? You’re making me cry, and I’m just getting sauced!
Why did the tomato turn to the onion for advice? Because it had good layers!
Why did the tomato go out with a prune? Because he couldn’t find a date with someone his own ripeness!
Why did the tomato go to the casino? Because it wanted to be a “high roller”!
What did the tomato say to the onion? “You make me cry, but I still love you!”
Why did the tomato turn into a superstar? Because it was a real show-stopper!
Why did the tomato turn down the movie role? It didn’t want to be typecast as a fruity character!
What did the tomato say to the cucumber? “You’re a pretty cool cuke!”

Tomato Joke Generator

Creating an amusing tomato joke can sometimes be a bit squashed.

(Catch my drift?)

That’s when our FREE Tomato Joke Generator comes to rescue the day.

Built to mesh witty puns, juicy humor, and whimsical phrases, it generates jokes that are assured to spread laughter.

Don’t let your humor become overripe and rotten.

Use our joke generator to brew jokes that are as fresh and appealing as your tomatoes.

FAQs About Tomato Jokes

Why are tomato jokes so popular?

Tomato jokes have a universal appeal due to the widespread use of tomatoes in various cuisines globally.

These jokes often revolve around the unique characteristics of tomatoes, such as their color, their role in salads, sauces and more, making them relatable and amusing for many.

Can tomato jokes help in social situations?

Definitely!

Jokes are a wonderful way to lighten the mood or initiate a conversation, and tomato jokes, given their widespread recognition, can be a fun way to achieve this.

Whether at a gathering, a dinner party or simply joking around with friends, a good tomato joke can bring out the giggles.

How can I come up with my own tomato jokes?

Understand the general traits of tomatoes—their red color, their classification confusion (fruit vs vegetable), their use in cooking, etc.
Tomatoes are commonly associated with certain words (e.g., sauce, ketchup, ripe). Try to find puns or fun phrases involving these words.
Think about the context or setting of your joke. Is it related to cooking? Or maybe a funny garden incident? Shape your joke around these themes.
Twist a famous saying or phrase to include tomato-related elements.
Don’t shy away from puns and wordplays. Tomato jokes are perfect for some clever linguistic fun!

Are there any tips for remembering tomato jokes?

You can try to link tomato jokes to the instances where you’d likely use them—while cooking, eating, or during a grocery run.

Associating the jokes with these activities can help you recall them easily.

How can I make my tomato jokes better?

The secret lies in the unexpected.

Create a common ground with your listeners, use the surprise factor, and play with words.

Remember, practice makes perfect, so keep telling your jokes to see what gets the biggest laughs.

How does the Tomato Joke Generator work?

Our Tomato Joke Generator is designed to deliver instant laughs.

Simply enter relevant keywords related to your tomato-themed humor or situation, and click the Generate Jokes button.

In no time, you’ll have a fresh bunch of hilarious tomato jokes ready to roll.

Is the Tomato Joke Generator free?

Yes, our Tomato Joke Generator is completely free to use!

Generate unlimited jokes and keep your conversations lively and humorous.

Don’t hesitate to sprinkle your social media and everyday chat with tomato humor.

Conclusion

Tomato jokes are a refreshing twist, adding a vibrant splash of fun to daily chit-chats and making life a bit more flavorful with every giggle.

From the quick and clever to the long and laughter-inducing, there’s a tomato joke for every event.

So next time you’re cutting into a tomato, remember, there’s humor to be found in every seed, skin, and slice.

Keep dishing out the laughs and let the good times ketchup to you.

Because after all, a day without laughter is like a day without tomatoes—unfathomable and, honestly, a little less tasty.

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