244 Apple Jokes That Are Ripe for a Good Laugh

If you’re here, it means you’re ready to bite into the world of Apple jokes.

Not just any jokes, but the pick of the orchard.

That’s why we’ve cobbled together a list of the most hilarious Apple jokes.

From core-ful puns to juicy one-liners, our compilation has a joke for every aspect of life.

So, let’s get to the crisp heart of Apple humor, one joke at a time.

Contents show

Apple Jokes

Apple jokes are a fruitful source of humor that can bring a chuckle to people of all ages.

They’re not just about the fruit but also revolve around the global technology giant, and the many aspects that surround it.

From the never-ending iPhone iterations to the iconic logo, apples offer plenty of fodder for humor.

These jokes resonate with a large audience because they tap into shared experiences and popular culture references.

Creating the perfect apple joke involves a delicate balance of wit, puns, and sometimes, a dose of tech humor.

Whether it’s poking fun at the latest iPhone features or making light of the simple act of eating an apple, these elements serve as the foundation for some truly hilarious jokes.

Ready to have your funny bone tickled?

Get ready to take a bite out of these apple jokes:

Why did the apple get in trouble at school? It couldn’t stop being a bad apple!
Why did the apple pie go to a dentist? It needed a filling!
Why did the apple stop playing music? It ran out of gigs!
Why did the apple go on a diet? Because it had a core belief in being healthy!
Why did the apple stop playing music? Because it had too many bad notes!
Why did the apple go to the party? Because it couldn’t find a core-ner to stay in.
Why did the apple go to the doctor? Because it wasn’t peeling very well!
What do you call an apple that is a bad influence? A rotten apple!
Why don’t apples go on vacation? Because they don’t want to turn into pear-ents.
What do you get when you cross an apple and a Christmas tree? A pineapple!
Why did the apple get a promotion? Because it was outstanding in its field!
What do you call a stolen apple? A fruit of the forbidden!
What did one apple say to the other apple in a competition? You’re the “apple” of my eye!
What did the apple say to the apple pie? “You’ve got some crust!”
Why did the apple go to outer space? To visit the Big Dipper!
Why did the apple go to the music concert? Because it wanted to be a jam session!
How do you make an apple puff? Chase it around the garden!
What did the apple say to the banana at the gym? Stop showing off, you’re always a-peeling!
What did the apple tree say to the apple? Stop being a “fruit” and grow up!
Why did the apple go to outer space? To find the apple-ien life!
How does an apple a day keep the doctor away? By being thrown really hard!
What’s an apple’s favorite type of exercise? Core workouts!
Why did the apple get promoted? Because it was a “fruitful” employee!

Short Apple Jokes

Short apple jokes are the sweet yet tangy humor snack you didn’t know you needed.

Ideal for text messages, social media captions, or as ice-breakers at social gatherings, these jokes will surely tickle your funny bone.

The charm of short apple jokes lies in their crisp wit and their ability to deliver a hearty laugh in just a few words.

Ready for some a-peel-ing humor?

Here are short apple jokes that deliver a bushel of laughs in just a few words.

What’s an apple’s favorite way to communicate? EyeMessage!
How did the apple feel after the gym? Sliced and diced!
What do you call a scared apple? A crapple!
Why was the apple mad at the orange? Because it couldn’t concentrate!
What do you call an apple that’s been bitten? A computer virus!
Why was the apple so lonely? It couldn’t find a “a-peel-ing” companion!
What do you call an apple that can sing? A seren-apple!
What do you call an apple that is always sleeping? A nap-ple!
Why don’t apples go on roller coasters? They’ll bruise easily!
Why was the apple always scared? It had low self-este-pear!
What do you call a fake apple? A counter-feit!
Why don’t apples make good teachers? They’re always getting picked!
Why did the apple cry? Because its peelings were hurt!
Why did the apple go to space? To find its core-stellation!
What do you call a rotten apple? A stinkin’ fruit!
What’s an apple’s favorite song? “Apples Just Wanna Have Fun!”
What’s an apple’s favorite song? “You’re the apple of my eye!”
How did the apple feel about getting eaten? It was totally crushed!
Why did the apple go on a vacation? It needed to “unwind”!
What do you call an apple with an opinion? A Macintosh!
What’s the apple’s favorite music genre? Rock ‘n’ roll!
Why was the apple sad? It had a rough peel-ing.
What’s an apple’s favorite music genre? Folk and orchard rock!
Why don’t apples go on vacation? Because they’d be applesauce!
What’s an apple’s favorite kind of music? Anything with “core” values!
Why was the apple always smiling? Because it knew its core values!
What kind of apple grows on a tree? All of them!
What’s an apple’s favorite song? “Apple Bottom Jeans”!
Why was the apple nervous? It was about to take the SATurn!

Apple Jokes One-Liners

Apple one-liner jokes are the core of humor, each delivering a quick crunch of comedy in just a single sentence.

They’re the comedic equivalent of biting into a crisp, juicy apple – refreshing, sharp, and leaving you wanting more.

Constructing an apple joke one-liner needs a mix of imagination, sharp wit, and a deep understanding of the art of puns.

The test is to package both the setup and punchline in a compact form, ensuring maximum laughter with minimum words.

Get ready to have your funny bone tickled with these apple one-liners that are sure to leave you rolling on the orchard floor with laughter:

What did the apple say to the pie? “You’re just so crusty!”
Why did the apple go to outer space? It wanted to be a cosmic “apple-star”!
What do you call an apple that’s been around the block? A seasoned fruit!
I asked Siri if she had any family, and she said, “No, but I’m happy to help you find yours.”>
I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised.
Why did the apple break up with the orange? They just couldn’t find their common core!
I’m not a big fan of apple cider, I find it hard to swallow.
What did the apple say to the orange during their argument? “You’re peeling me apart!”
What do you call an apple that’s a bad comedian? A cr-apple!
I got a job at Apple because I wanted to be associated with success. Now, I’m fired because I wanted to be associated with an iPhone X.
Why don’t apples ever get lonely? Because they always have their core friends.
I heard a joke about an apple, but it was too cheesy. It was a Granny Smith joke!
I went on a date with an apple. It was a fruitful experience!
Why did the apple win the race? It knew how to “pace” itself!
What did the apple say to the orange? “You’re not my type!”
Did you hear about the apple that went on a date with a banana? It ended up being a fruitless relationship.
Why was the apple so good at math? It knew all the core principles!
Why did the apple take up knitting? It wanted to make some “apple-solutely” trendy scarves!
I accidentally swallowed some Apple seeds. My doctor told me that Apple trees might start growing in my stomach. I replied, ‘Well, let them. I’ll have apples for life!’.
Why did the apple start a fight with the orange? It had a bad peel-ing!
Why was the apple so popular at the party? Because it was a real “a-peel”!
Why did the apple run for president? Because it knew how to take a bite out of the competition!
Why did the apple break up with the orange? It just couldn’t “squeeze” the relationship!
Why did the apple break up with the banana? It just couldn’t find the a-peel anymore!
I bought a new Apple computer, but it doesn’t seem to be very a-peeling.
I asked an apple if it had any friends. It said, “Only the ones I can count on one hand!”
I asked the apple if it wanted to go on a date, but it said it wasn’t ready to core-mmit!
Why did the apple run for president? Because it knew how to campaign effectively!
What did one apple say to the other apple in a race? I hope you don’t bruise easily!
Why did the apple go to college? To get a degree in Newtonian physics!
I asked Siri to divide zero by zero, and it replied, “Imagine you have zero apples, and you want to give them to zero friends. How many apples does each person get? See? It doesn’t make sense!”
I tried to make a fruit salad, but all the apples were hiding. They were just being a little orchard to get!
I tried to make a fruit salad, but all the apples were core-rupt!
I asked my friend if he likes Apple products. He said, “I’m more of a Granny Smith fan.”>
Did you hear about the apple who joined a gym? It wanted to get a core workout!
I couldn’t figure out why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me… it was an apple!
Why did the apple go on a diet? It didn’t want to turn into a cider apple!
I accidentally swallowed an apple seed. Now, a tree is growing inside me. It’s the apple of my abdomen!
Why did the apple stop playing football? It was always getting picked off!
I tried to take a bite out of my iPhone… It was a hard apple to swallow!
What did one apple say to the other apple? Nothing, apples can’t talk!
Why did the apple go to college? To get a little more “core” education!
What do you call a bee that comes from an apple? A honeycrisp!
How did the apple get drunk? It had too many apple-tinis!
I asked the apple if it wanted to hear a joke, but it said, “I’ve already heard all the core ones.”>
Why did the apple become an actor? It wanted to be in the “fruit-ion” pictures!
Why did the apple stop playing music? It couldn’t find a good “core-d” replacement for its drumstick!
Why did the Apple store start selling sushi? Because they wanted to roll with the times!
Why did the apple go on a diet? It had too many “a-pie-calories”!
I asked my friend if he wanted to try a bite of my apple. He said, “No thanks, I’m already a Mac!”
Why don’t apples like to go on vacation? They prefer to stay in cider!
I asked the apple if it wanted to go for a swim, but it said it didn’t want to be in cider water.
Why did the apple stop playing music? It couldn’t find its AirPods!
Why did the apple file a police report? It was a victim of a bad apple!
Why did the apple go to the party? It wanted to “core” around and have a good time!
Did you hear about the apple who won the lottery? He became a millionaire!
I told my computer to open the Apple website, and it started eating fruit.
Why did the apple go to the concert? It wanted to “core” along with the music!
Why did the apple take a break from the gym? It couldn’t find a core trainer.
What did the apple say to the orange? Stop being so citrus-ly jealous of my popularity!
I went to the Apple store and asked for a phone that couldn’t be traced. They gave me a Nokia.
Why did the apple go to therapy? It couldn’t stop comparing itself to oranges.
I told my wife she should embrace her mistakes, so she hugged her iPhone.
What do you call an apple that plays the guitar? A jamming session.
I told my wife she should embrace her inner Apple… She smacked me with an iPad.
What’s an apple’s favorite music genre? Peel-hop!
I told my Apple watch it was time to get a sense of humor, but it just ticked me off.
I tried to take a bite out of my iPhone, but it left a bad Apple taste in my mouth.
Why was the apple afraid to go to the circus? It was scared of the “aerial” performers!
Why did the apple never graduate? It kept getting picked on!
I refused to believe my road trip GPS when it said, “In 400 feet, take a slight right towards the apple pie.”>
I asked the apple if it had any jokes, but it said it wasn’t ready to be a punchline apple-yet!
How do you fix a broken Apple? With a “fruit” ninja!
Why did the apple break up with the orange? It couldn’t peel the chemistry between them!
An apple a day keeps anyone away if you throw it hard enough.
I asked an apple what the secret to its shiny skin was, and it said, “I use a-iLotion!”
I used to hate apples, but then I realized they were the core of the problem.
I just asked Siri what the Apple employee discount was and she told me to get a job at Samsung.
I heard a rumor that the apple orchard was haunted, but it turned out to be just a bunch of scaredy pears.

Apple Dad Jokes

Apple dad jokes are the epitome of fruity humor, combining the irresistibly silly with the wonderfully corny.

They’re the type of jokes that are so cheesy, they’re absolutely hilarious.

These jokes are perfect for livening up a party, making dinner time more fun, or simply brightening someone’s day.

Get ready for some eye-rolling.

Here are some apple dad jokes that are guaranteed to tickle your funny bone:

Why did the apple go to the party? Because it knew it would be the core of attention.
Why did the apple go to space? To prove that it’s not just pie in the sky!
Why did the apple go to school? Because it wanted to be a smart apple, just like Apple’s latest gadgets.
Why did the apple go to the party? Because it wanted to be the apple of everyone’s eye.
Why did the apple go to the party alone? Because it couldn’t find a better pair, just like AirPods.
Why did the apple go to the gym? Because it wanted to get core strength.
What’s the easiest way to make an apple turnover? Just push it down the hill!
What’s an apple’s favorite exercise? Running, because it always gets juiced!
What’s an apple’s favorite exercise? Running… out of juice!
Why did the apple take a nap? Because it needed to rest in pieces!
What did one apple say to the other apple at the party? “You’re looking quite appealing tonight!”
What’s an apple’s favorite dance move? The apple shuffle!
What do you call an apple that is an overachiever? A high achiever.
Why did the apple go to school? To improve its core curriculum.
Why was the apple scared? Because it heard the banana split!
Why did the apple go to space? Because it wanted to find its core values, just like Apple’s mission statement.
What do you call fake spaghetti? An impasta.
What’s an apple’s favorite song? “Apples and Bananas”!
Why did the apple stop rolling down the hill? Because it ran out of juice.
Why did the apple take a vacation? Because it needed to get away from its pear-ents.
Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field, just like Apple’s customer service.
How do you make an apple turnover? You push it down the hill!
Why was the apple so smart? Because it had a lot of core knowledge!
What do you call a fruit that is rough around the edges? A bad apple.
Why did the apple go out with a prune? Because it couldn’t find a date, just like Siri sometimes struggles to understand you.
What did the apple tree say to the hungry squirrel? Stop picking on me!
Why don’t eggs tell jokes? Because they might crack up.
What is an apple’s favorite exercise? Running in the orchard.
Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself? It was two-tired.
Why did the apple turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing, and now it wants to be a part of it!
Why was the math book sad? Because it had too many problems, just like the apple.
Why did the apple go on a diet? Because it wanted to be a little more a-peeling!
How do you catch a squirrel? Climb a tree and act like a nut.
Why did the apple go to the beach? Because it wanted to get a little sun “dried”!
Why was the apple afraid of the computer? Because it didn’t want to get “byte.”>
Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything, just like Apple’s new products.
What did the apple say to the worm? Stop bugging me!
Why did the apple take a break? It needed to get a bit more “core” strength!
Why do apples make good detectives? Because they always find the core of the problem.

Apple Jokes for Kids

Apple jokes for kids are like the juicy fruit themselves—crisp, sweet, and loved by children everywhere.

These jokes help children engage with language in a fun, playful way, promoting the delight of puns and wordplay.

They fuel a passion for humor that’s as nutritious and vital as the apple itself.

Moreover, apple jokes for kids also serve as a fun way to highlight the importance of healthy eating, transforming that apple in their lunchbox into a source of hearty laughter.

Are you ready for some rib-tickling fun?

Here are the jokes that’ll have them chuckling over their apple cider:

Why was the apple always cold? It was surrounded by its “core” family!
Why did the apple go to the library? Because it wanted to find a good book to “chew” on.
Why did the apple get a job at the bakery? Because it knew how to turnover.
What is the apple’s favorite exercise? Core workouts.
Why did the apple go to space? To see the “core” of the universe.
What is an apple’s favorite kind of book? One that’s filled with adventure stories!
What do you get if you cross an apple with a magician? A Granny Smith!
Why did the apple go to outer space? To become a space-cotash.
What’s an apple’s favorite sport? Fruitball.
What did the apple tree say to the apple? Stop “orchard”-ing me around!
What’s red and goes up and down? A tomato in an elevator!
What do you call an apple that is afraid of the dark? A scaredy-apple.
What is an apple’s favorite type of clothing? A pair of jeans!
Why did the apple go to space? To prove that it’s a universal fruit!
What do you get if you cross an apple with a Halloween decoration? A scare-apple!
What did the apple say to the banana? Stop monkeying around!
What kind of apple isn’t an apple? A pineapple.
What is an apple’s favorite sport? Fruitball.
What’s the most musical fruit? The apple, because it’s always jamming!
Why did the apple go to the party? Because it was a “core” component of the celebration!
What’s the apple’s favorite exercise? Running, because it wants to be a “pear”
What is an apple’s favorite vegetable? Celery!
What do you call an apple that’s been a comedian for a long time? A wise-cracker.

Apple Jokes for Adults

Who says adults can’t have a good chuckle over an apple joke?

Apple jokes for adults are a unique blend of smart wit and a hint of sassiness, just like a tangy apple pie with a spicy cinnamon twist.

Just as the crunch of a fresh apple is satisfying, these jokes serve up humor, intellect, and a dash of naughtiness that are sure to leave a delightful aftertaste of laughter.

These jokes are the perfect accompaniment for cocktail parties, potlucks, or simply for lightening the mood in a serious adult conversation.

So, let’s dive into the orchard of humor with some apple jokes that are exclusively designed for adults:

What did one apple say to the other apple? Stop being a bad apple!
Why did the apple file a police report? Because it got “mugged”!
Why don’t apples ever get lonely? Because they always hang out in bunches!
Why did the apple go to therapy? It had some serious core issues!
What do you call an apple that is trying to be funny? A fruit loop!
Why did the apple turn to the dark side? It wanted to become a bad apple!
Why did the apple turn down the banana? It didn’t find him appealing!
What do you call an apple that’s afraid to jump? A scaredy-crisp!
Why did the apple break up with the orange? They had a “fruit-less” relationship!
What did the apple say to the banana on the beach? “You’re peeling quite appealing!”
Why did the apple go to the disco? It wanted to get down and core-y!
Why did the apple go on a date with a banana? It couldn’t find a date with better appeal!
Why did the apple start a band? It wanted to be the “apple” of everyone’s ears!
What’s an apple’s favorite rapper? 2Pac-a-pie!
Why did the apple turn brown? It saw the orange and got “squeezed” with jealousy!
Why did the apple turn to its friend and say, “I’m feeling saucy”? It wanted to be a little tart!
Why don’t apples ever get lonely? Because they’re always in a bunch!
What did one apple say to the other apple at the gym? You need to stop being such a core!
Why did the apple turn down the invitation to the party? It didn’t want to be the core of attention!
What’s an apple’s favorite kind of music? Jam sessions!
Why did the apple take a vacation? It needed to peel out and relax!
Why did the apple run away from home? It didn’t want to end up in a pie!
What do you call an apple that’s not an apple? A pineapple!
Why did the apple stop gambling? It lost all its seeds!
Why did the apple go to the doctor? It was feeling a bit rotten!
What did the apple say to the pear? You’re looking a bit pear-shaped today!
Why did the apple go to the library? It wanted to find its core values!
Why don’t apples like to gamble? They’re afraid of losing their core savings!
What do you call two apples that are next to each other? A pear!
Why did the apple stop in the middle of the road? It ran out of battery!
What did the apple say to its partner on their wedding day? “I’m so grateful we found each other, we’re the perfect pear!”
Why did the apple break up with the orange? It couldn’t resist its a-peeling charm!
What’s an apple’s favorite kind of exercise? Orchardobics!
Why did the apple go to therapy? It had a severe core complex!
Why don’t apples go to college? Because they are always falling down!
What did the apple say to the orange? Nothing, because apples don’t talk!
Why did the apple turn red? It saw the salad dressing undressing!
What do you call a nervous apple? A fruit basket case!
What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear… or an apple!
What do you call an apple that tries to be a comedian? A “pun”apple!
Why did the apple get a promotion? It was the “apple” of the boss’s eye!
Why did the apple get promoted? It knew how to apply itself!
Why did the apple get in trouble at school? It forgot to be core-rect!
What did the apple say to the pineapple at the party? Nothing, they just waved!
Why did the apple stop playing music? It lost its core rhythm!
What do you call a bear that steals apples? A fruit burglar!

Apple Joke Generator

Squeezing out the perfect apple joke can sometimes feel like a fruitless endeavor.

(Do you catch my drift?)

That’s where our FREE Apple Joke Generator comes to the rescue.

Engineered to combine witty puns, juicy humor, and amusing phrases, it generates jokes that are sure to plant seeds of laughter.

Don’t let your humor wither and fall off the tree.

Use our joke generator to produce jokes that are as crisp and refreshing as your apples.

FAQs About Apple Jokes

Why are apple jokes so popular?

Apple jokes are a classic form of humor, often playing on the fruit’s associations with health, knowledge, and certain popular phrases.

They are simple, catchy, and universally understood, making them a favorite among many.

Can apple jokes help in social situations?

Indeed!

Telling a joke is an excellent way to break the ice, lighten the atmosphere, or exhibit your sense of humor.

Apple jokes, with their wide-ranging appeal, can create laughter in almost any scenario.

How can I come up with my own apple jokes?

Learn more about apples—their taste, color, the fact they come in numerous varieties, etc.
Apples have a unique vocabulary associated with them (e.g., core, cider, peel). Search for pun opportunities or interesting phrases involving these words.
Consider the context of your joke. Is it a silly classroom situation? A misunderstanding in a conversation? Shape your humor to suit this setting.
Modify a well-known saying or idiom to include apple-related elements.
Welcome puns and wordplay. Apple jokes are perfect for some lighthearted linguistics and pun-filled humor!