506 Apricot Jokes to Add a Juicy Twist to Your Day

If you’re here, it means you’re ready to bite into the world of apricot jokes.

Not just any jokes, but the pick of the bunch.

That’s why we’ve compiled a list of the most hilarious apricot jokes.

From puns that are the pit’s to juicy one-liners, our compilation has a joke for every facet of life.

So, let’s delve into the sweet core of apricot humor, one joke at a time.

Contents show

Apricot Jokes

Get ready for a peachy time as we dive into the world of apricot jokes!

Apricot humor is not just about the fruit, but also about its unique place in the culinary world and cultural references.

These jokes are sweet, sometimes tangy, and always full of flavor, just like the fruit itself.

Creating the perfect apricot joke requires a knack for puns, an understanding of the fruit’s quirks (such as its small size yet big flavor or the surprise of finding a hard stone in the center), and of course, a good sense of humor.

So, get ready to crack a smile as we present a bushel of these juicy apricot jokes!

What’s an apricot’s favorite exercise? Pilates! They love to stretch and flex their pits.
What do you call an apricot that won’t stop talking? An apricot-tunist!
Why did the apricot go to space? It wanted to be the first fruit on the moon!
What do you call an apricot that’s full of energy? A zest-apricot!
Why was the apricot so afraid of the peach? It heard it was a real stone-cold fruit.
What’s an apricot’s favorite sport? Peach volleyball!
Why did the apricot take a vacation? To get some much-needed R&R (Ripe and Refreshing)!
What do you call an apricot who can’t stop singing? A Juicy Jamboree!
Why was the apricot always getting in trouble? It was a real peach of a troublemaker!
Why did the apricot break up with the watermelon? It couldn’t handle all the seeds of doubt in their relationship!
Why did the apricot break up with the orange? It couldn’t concentrate – too much zest in the relationship!
Why did the apricot make a great comedian? Because it always had people rolling with laughter in the orchard!
What did the apricot say to the bad joke? “That’s just pit-iful!”
What did the apricot say to the watermelon? You’re one in a melon, but I’m apricot of the bunch!
Why did the apricot take a photo? It wanted to capture the perfect peach-ture!
Why did the apricot become a comedian? It loved to crack pits and make everyone laugh!
Why did the apricot go to the gym? It wanted to work on its core strength and become a “fruit-ab!”!
Why did the apricot go to school? To get a little apricot-ical education!
What’s an apricot’s favorite game? Pit ‘n’ Seek!
What do you call an apricot that’s always looking for a fight? A pit bull!
Why did the apricot take a vacation? It needed a little R&R (Ripe and Refreshed).
What do you call an apricot that’s always running late? A tardy apricot!
What did the apricot say to its friend? “You’re the pits!”
Why did the apricot bring a ladder to the orchard? It wanted to climb to new heights and be the top fruit!
How did the apricot feel after a long day? Totally plum-tuckered out!
Why did the apricot get a job as a lifeguard? It wanted to be a fruity-saver!
Why did the apricot go to the party alone? Because it couldn’t find a date!
What did the apricot say when it won a race? I’m on a roll, let’s raisin the bar!
Why did the apricot break up with the peach? Because it couldn’t find its pit in the relationship!
What do you call a polite apricot? Well-manner-melon.
What did one apricot say to the other when they had a disagreement? Let’s not pit ourselves against each other!
How do apricots organize a party? They send out fruity-vites!
What did one apricot say to the other at a party? Let’s get jamming!
What’s an apricot’s favorite movie? Pulp Fiction!
Why did the apricot never get in trouble? Because it always stayed apricot of the law!
Why did the apricot go to school? It wanted to become the next jam-azing scientist!
How did the apricot propose to the plum? With a ring-a-ding-ding!
How did the apricot propose to his girlfriend? With a peachy ring!
How did the apricot propose to its sweetheart? It gave her a peach ring!
What do you call an apricot that’s afraid of heights? A fruit that’s plum-metaphobic!
Why was the apricot feeling so stressed? It had a lot of pits to deal with!
What did the apricot say to the cherry? Stop pit-ting me against you!
Why did the apricot always win at chess? Because it was a master of the apricot-moves!
Why was the apricot so good at math? It could count its pits with ease!
What do you call an apricot that is a great dancer? A Cha-Cha-Cha-Pricot!
What do you call an apricot that can’t stop laughing? A real gig-gle fruit!
How did the apricot propose to the peach? With a ring made of dried fruit!
Why did the apricot call its friends? Because it couldn’t “jam” by itself!
Why did the apricot take a vacation? It needed a little R&R&R (Rest, Relaxation, and Ripening)!
How did the apricot win the race? It took a peachy shortcut!
What did the apricot say to the apple after a long day? Let’s just relax and chill, we don’t need any more drama!
What did the apricot say to its friend? “Let’s stick together like pits in a pod!”
What did the apricot say when it won the lottery? I’m going to get a luxurious pit mansion!
Why did the apricot go to school? To learn how to be a peach!
What did the apricot say to the peach at the party? “You’re looking peachy tonight!”
How did the apricot solve the math problem? It used its apricot-calculus!
Why did the apricot go to the spa? It wanted to get pit-icures and fruit facials.
Why did the apricot get a job as a detective? Because it wanted to find the missing peach!
What do you call an apricot that is all alone? A solofruit.
What did one apricot say to the other apricot at the party? You’re looking apricot-ty fine!
What do you call an apricot that’s good at math? A number cruncher!
What did the apricot say to the plum? Let’s jam together and create something sweet!
What did the apricot say to its friend? Let’s get jamming together!
What’s an apricot’s favorite mode of transportation? A fruitcycle.
What did the apricot say to its friend? “Orange you glad we’re friends?”
How do you make an apricot laugh? Tell it a fruity joke, it’s sure to crack up!
How did the apricot learn to ride a bike? It took pit stops to rest and refuel along the way!
Why did the apricot go to the casino? It wanted to roll the dice!
What’s an apricot’s favorite exercise? Squatting to become a peach!
Why was the apricot acting so shy? It was just a little apricot-stic!
What did one apricot say to the other when it was feeling down? “Chin up, fruity friend!”
Why did the apricot blush? Because it saw the peach without any clothes on!
Why was the apricot sitting in the corner? Because it had a pit-y party!
Why did the apricot go to therapy? Because it had a lot of pits and issues to work through!
Why did the apricot always win at poker? It had a great poker face – peachy keen!
Why did the apricot go to the library? It wanted to check out some juicy stories!
Why was the apricot always the life of the party? Because it was always a-peeling!
Why did the apricot break up with the date? It said it was too clingy!
What do you call an apricot that wears a crown? The king of fruits!
Why did the apricot stop playing cards? It was tired of getting pitted against all the aces.
How did the apricot fix its computer? It hit the Ctrl+Peach!
Why did the apricot start a band? Because it wanted to jam with its fruit buddies!
Why did the apricot always win the spelling bee? Because it had great a-pricot-tion.
What did the apricot say to the orange? “Hey, citrus buddy, let’s get juicy together!”
What did the apricot say to the apple? Let’s roll with it and become the fruity dream team!
Why was the apricot always getting into trouble? Because it had a real zest for mischief!
Why did the apricot become a chef? It wanted to be the zest in the kitchen!
What do you call a nervous apricot? Anxietea!
Why did the apricot become an actor? Because it had a great stone-act!

Short Apricot Jokes

Short apricot jokes are like a fresh, juicy piece of fruit – sweet, light-hearted and deliciously amusing.

These jokes are perfect for a light-hearted text message, a funny social media caption, or to break the ice at a gathering with a quick, whimsical laugh.

The beauty of short apricot jokes is their ability to blend a dash of word play with a hint of absurdity, inciting laughter in just a sentence or two.

And now, brace yourself for a peal of laughter!

Here are short apricot jokes that deliver a dose of daily humor in the blink of an eye.

What do you call an apricot that tells jokes? A hilarious fruitcot!
Why was the apricot so friendly? It couldn’t resist being a-peach-able!
What’s an apricot’s favorite exercise? Pit-ched tenths!
What do you call a shy apricot? An “introverted cot”!
What do you call an apricot with a black belt? A “karatcot”!
What’s an apricot’s favorite dance move? The pit-y shuffle!
Why was the apricot blushing? It saw the peach without its skin!
What’s an apricot’s favorite exercise? The peach press!
How do you describe a good-looking apricot? A-peeling!
Why did the apricot turn red? It was jam-packed with embarrassment!
Why don’t apricots ever get married? Because they always pit out!
How do apricots communicate? They use apricodex!
What did the apricot say to the lemon? Let’s make some zest!
Why was the apricot always so calm? It had a “peachful” personality!
Why don’t apricots ever play cards? Because they can’t handle the pit!
What did the apricot say to the orange? Nothing, it just “purred”!
Why was the apricot feeling down? It had the pits!
What do you call a nervous apricot? A little fruit basket case!
What do you call a grumpy apricot? A sour-icot!
How do you catch a runaway apricot? With a peach-net!
What do you call an apricot with a broken heart? A tearicot.
How did the apricot celebrate its birthday? With a fruit party!
Why was the apricot always worried? It had a lot of pit-falls!
Why don’t apricots ever get lonely? They hang out in bunches!
Why did the apricot blush? It saw the “peachy-keen” mango!
What do you call an apricot who’s always on time? Punctual-pricot!
What’s an apricot’s favorite exercise? Peach and carry!
Why did the apricot quit its job? It couldn’t handle the “prescot”!
What’s an apricot’s favorite subject in school? Stone-ometry!
How do you fix a broken apricot? With some apricot glue!
What did the apricot say to the orange? Stop being so citrus-ty!
What’s an apricot’s favorite type of music? Rock ‘n’ roll-fruit!
Why was the apricot sad? It had a stone-cold heart!
What did the apricot say to the orange? I’m pit-ty good!

Apricot Jokes One-Liners

Apricot jokes one-liners are like biting into a fresh, juicy apricot – they pack a surprising punch of sweet humor in a small package.

These are the kind of jokes that burst with humor, just as an apricot bursts with flavor when bitten into – unexpected, quick and deliciously satisfying.

Crafting a perfect apricot one-liner joke requires wit, timing, and a sense of humor as vibrant and lively as the color of a ripe apricot.

The beauty lies in delivering the punchline with as much brevity and precision as possible, achieving the perfect blend of humor and surprise.

Get ready for a hearty laugh as these apricot one-liners roll off your tongue as smoothly as a ripe apricot slides down your throat:

Why did the apricot blush? Because it saw the peach getting fresh with the plum!
What do you call a mischievous apricot? A practical joker-icot!
I asked my apricot to play hide-and-seek, but it said it would just be a-peach-ing!
Why was the apricot always so confident? Because it knew it was a-peeling!
Why did the apricot refuse to fight in the fruit salad? It didn’t want to be a part of a jam!
What did the apricot say to its friend? “I’m sorry, I can’t elope with you, I’m not a plum!”
Why did the apricot stop in the middle of the road? It ran out of juice!
What’s an apricot’s favorite exercise? Pit-cher perfect!
What do you call an apricot that is afraid to swim? A Chickenfruit!
How did the apricot apologize? With a heartfelt “apri-sorry!”
Why did the apricot break up with the peach? It wanted to be a single fruit!
Why did the apricot never get into trouble? It always avoided the jam.
Why did the apricot blush? It saw the peach flirtatiously winking at it!
What do you get if you cross an apricot with a comedian? A fruit that can crack you up with its jokes!
I tried to teach my apricot to dance, but all it did was the waltz—apparently, it didn’t have the moves like Jagger!
Why did the apricot get promoted? Because it was a real peach of an employee!
Why did the apricot become a detective? It wanted to crack the case of the missing peach!
I heard the apricot was trying to become a movie star, but it couldn’t find a good agent—everyone said it was too much of a stone-faced fruit.
What did the apricot say to the orange? “Apeel-ing weather we’re having, isn’t it?”
Why did the apricot go to school? Because it wanted to be a little apricademic!
Why did the apricot become a chef? It wanted to make flambé apricot surprises!
I asked the apricot if it knew any good jokes, and it replied, “I’m a fruit, not a stand-up comedian!”
What did one apricot say to the other? “I pit you against anyone!”
What did the apricot say to the peach? Let’s pit our fruits against each other!
I told the apricot it needed to relax, and it replied, “I’m already stone fruit!”
Why did the apricot become a chef? Because it wanted to be the toast of the fruit world!
How do you make an apricot laugh? Tickling its fuzzy “skin”!
Why did the apricot refuse to fight? It believed in the power of peac(h)ful resolutions!
What do you call an apricot that plays guitar? A jammin’ fruit!
Why did the apricot refuse to play cards? It was tired of being in the pits!
Why did the apricot call the police? It was being squeezed for information!
How did the apricot become a detective? It had a knack for cracking fruity cases!
What did the apricot say to the orange? Let’s squeeze in some fruity fun!
Why was the apricot always invited to parties? Because it was a real “stone” cold fruit!
Why did the apricot always win at poker? It had the best poker face among fruits!
Why did the apricot get promoted? Because it was always raisin the bar!
Why did the apricot file a police report? It got squeezed by an aggressive orange!
Why did the apricot go to the library? To find a good book on “apri-culture”!
What did the apricot say to the orange? Let’s make some jam together, we make a great pear!
What do you call an apricot that likes to tell jokes? A punnet comedian!
Why did the apricot get a promotion? Because it always stayed peachy keen!
Why did the apricot turn red? It saw the peach blush and got jealous!
Why did the apricot break up with the peach? It felt they were just too different—like comparing apples and oranges!
What did one apricot say to the other during a race? “Let’s juice do it!”
Why did the apricot go to the party? Because it heard it was going to be a jammin’ time!
Why was the apricot feeling so confident? It knew it was the fruit of its labor!
What do you call a depressed apricot? A fruit with the pits.
Why did the apricot refuse to fight with the plum? It didn’t want to start a fruit war!
My friend told me he’s allergic to apricots, but I think he’s just trying to avoid a fruit-ful conversation!
Why did the apricot go on a diet? It wanted to be a little more stone-fruitful!
I bought a fake apricot, but it was just an im-peach-ment!
What’s an apricot’s favorite type of exercise? Ju-jitsu!
What’s an apricot’s favorite game? Pit-a-pat-a-cot!
Why was the apricot so good at math? It loved counting its seeds!
Why did the apricot wear sunscreen? It wanted to protect its delicate skin from getting too ripe.
What did the apricot say to the apple? “You’re the apple of my pie!”
Why did the apricot wear sunglasses? To hide from the paparazzi!
What did one apricot say to the other at the party? “Let’s make this night apri-“COOL”!”
What did the apricot say to its fellow fruit? “You’re the zest in my life!”
Why was the apricot always chosen as the class representative? It had the most ap-peel!
I told my apricot a joke, but it didn’t laugh. It said it was stone-faced!
Why did the apricot refuse to play hide-and-seek? It couldn’t find a good peeling spot!
Why did the apricot go to the doctor? Because it was feeling a little “peached” out!
Why did the apricot get a job as a comedian? Because it had a great sense of apricotty!
Why did the apricot get a promotion? Because it had a peach of a personality!
Why was the apricot so good at math? It always knew how to count on its pit!
What did the apricot say when it won an award? I’m feeling like the top fruit in the bunch!
What did the apricot say when it won the beauty pageant? “I’m the apricot of the crop!”
I asked the apricot if it wanted to join a band, but it said it preferred to be a solo fruitist.
Why did the apricot get a job at the bakery? It kneaded the dough.
Why did the apricot get in trouble at work? It couldn’t stop jamming around!
What do you call a group of apricots playing hide-and-seek? Dis-apricots!
Why did the apricot go to therapy? It had serious commitment issues with being a fruit.
What did the apricot say when it won the lottery? I’m going to be apricotably wealthy!
What did the apricot say to its friend? Life is just peachy with you!
I tried to teach my apricot how to dance, but it just ended up doing the fruit shuffle!
Why did the apricot break up with the plum? They couldn’t find a way to make it apri-work!
Why was the apricot running late? It oversnoozed!
Why did the apricot start a band? Because it had a great zest for music!
I asked the apricot if it had any good jokes, but it said it was still trying to pit-ifully come up with one!
I asked the apricot if it wanted to join a band, but it said it couldn’t because it already had a jam session.
Why did the apricot take up gardening? It wanted to branch out in life!
Why did the apricot bring a ladder to the party? Because it heard the peaches were high society!
What did the apricot say when it won the race? I’m the zest apricot on the track!
Why did the apricot turn red? It saw the apple blushing and thought it looked berry adorable!
What do you call an apricot that’s been on a diet? A slim-fruit.
What do you get when you cross an apricot with a pineapple? A tropical fruit salad that will knock your socks off!
Why did the apricot go to the dentist? It had a severe case of cavity-liciousness!
How did the apricot stop itself from laughing too hard? It put itself on a strict pit-stop!
Why did the apricot take a nap? It was feeling a bit jam-packed.
What did one apricot say to the other when they won the lottery? “We’re in the pits now!”
What do you call a rebellious apricot? A fruit loop!
Why did the apricot take a vacation? It wanted to pit-er away from the daily grind!
What did the apricot say to the banana? Let’s split and make a fruity duo!
Why did the apricot refuse to fight in the war? It was a pacifruit!
What’s an apricot’s favorite type of music? Stone fruit rock and roll!
What did the apricot do when it won the lottery? It started to feel like a million peaches.
Why did the apricot go to the gym? It wanted to get into shape for summer jams.
I accidentally ate an apricot seed and now I’m worried I’ll turn into a fruit tree. Can’t wait to see what kind of tree I’ll be!
What did the apricot say when it got squeezed? “Don’t worry, I’m just a peach in disguise!”

Apricot Dad Jokes

Apricot dad jokes are the perfect mix of sweet humor and tangy puns that will surely make you both groan and chuckle simultaneously.

They’re the kind of jokes that are so corny, they’re hilarious.

These jokes are perfect for summer picnics, backyard barbecues, or just to brighten up a dull day.

Get ready for some hearty laughter followed by facepalming.

Here are some apricot dad jokes that are sure to entertain:

Why did the apricot go to the party? It wanted to be the life of the fruit punch!
What did one apricot say to the other? Nothing, they just pitied each other!
What do you get when you cross an apricot with a comedian? A fruit that tells hilarious jokes and always leaves you in stitches!
How do you make an apricot laugh? Tell it a plum joke and watch it turn into a prune with laughter!
Why did the apricot take a nap? Because it was plum-tuckered out!
Why did the apricot stop playing hide-and-seek? It couldn’t find a good hiding pl-ace!
How did the apricot respond when asked if it was feeling fruity? It said, “I’m a-peach-iating the pun!”
What did the apricot say to the orange at the party? “I’m so glad we squeezed in some time to hang out!”
Why did the apricot win the race? Because it had a “peach”y keen sense of determination!
What do you call an apricot that can play a musical instrument? A jammin’ fruit!
What did the apricot say when it became the class president? “I promise to be a “fruitful” leader!”
Why did the apricot become a detective? Because it wanted to “apri-solve” juicy mysteries!
Why did the apricot run for president? Because it believed in making the world a sweeter place!
Why was the apricot always getting into trouble? It had a knack for being a little fruity!
Why did the apricot always win at sports? Because it had a “peach” of a competitive spirit!
Why did the apricot go to the gym? To get “peachy” keen muscles!
How do apricots organize a surprise party? They give each other a “pit” notice!
What do you call an apricot that becomes a superhero? A “stone fruit” with special powers!
What do you call an apricot that is always on time? A punctual fruit!
What do you call an apricot that gets sunburned? A hot fruit!
What do you get when you cross an apricot with a pineapple? A tropical fruit that’s all about the apricots!
Why was the apricot afraid of going to the gym? It didn’t want to be turned into a smoothie!
What’s an apricot’s favorite dance move? The twist and pit.
Why did the apricot refuse to play cards? It didn’t want to be in a “jam” with the deck!
Why did the apricot get promoted? Because it was a great fruit-ture!
How did the apricot propose to the peach? It said, “We make a great pear!”
What did the apricot say to the peach at the party? Nice to meat you!
What did the apricot say to the apple? “I’m so much sweeter than you!”
Why are apricots so friendly? Because they never pit anyone against each other!
Why did the apricot take up gardening? It wanted to grow into a tree-mendous fruit.
What did the apricot say to the peach? Hey, are you my long-lost cousin? We both have such fruity personalities!
What’s an apricot’s favorite exercise? Pitting itself against the competition!
How do you make an apricot laugh? Tell it a “punny” fruit joke!
Why was the apricot always so calm? Because it knew how to “apricot-iate” the little things!
Why did the apricot feel left out? Because it didn’t get invited to the fruit salad party.
Why did the apricot take a nap? Because it was exhausted from being “apricot-ive” all day!
Why did the apricot stop playing hide-and-seek? It wasn’t very good at staying apricot!
Why did the apricot break up with the pear? Because it couldn’t handle the juice!
Why was the apricot so shy? It didn’t want to come out of its shell!
Why are apricots so trusting? Because they always see the peach in people!
Why did the apricot break up with the plum? Because it found a sweeter fruit.
Why did the apricot become an actor? It wanted to play the starring role in “Fruitopia”!
Why did the apricot start working out? It wanted to become a real muscle-peach!
What did the apricot say to the grapefruit? Peel the music, it’s time to jam!
Why was the apricot running so fast? It was trying to catch up with the peach!
What did the apricot say to the peach at the party? Let’s make it a jam session!
Why was the apricot mad at the orange? Because it was feeling citrus-ly ignored!
Why did the apricot get a job at the bakery? It wanted to become a tart-icot!
Why did the apricot never get promoted? It just couldn’t ketchup with the competition!
Why did the apricot get promoted at work? Because it always had a peachy attitude!
How do you know when an apricot is angry? It turns into a little orange!
How do you catch an apricot? You wait until it’s jam-packed and then pounce!
Why did the apricot go to the baseball game? It wanted to see the “peach” play!
What did the apricot say to the orange? “You’re just a citrus impostor!”
What do you call an apricot that’s always honest? A fruit-ful of integrity!
Why did the apricot go to school? Because it wanted to improve its “A-pricot” score!
How do you know an apricot is happy? It’s always smiling and saying, “I’m apricot-iated!”
Why did the apricot blush? Because it saw the peach in the fruit bowl!
What do you call an apricot that goes on a lot of adventures? An adventu-fruit!
Why did the apricot take a ladder to the grocery store? Because it couldn’t “reach-ot” the top shelf!
How does an apricot apologize? It says “I’m really sorry, but it’s the pits.”
What do you call a mischievous apricot? A sneaky little fruit!
Why did the apricot refuse to fight? It didn’t want to make a jam out of the situation!
What do you call an apricot that’s won a race? The apricot-on-the-go!
What did the apricot say to the grape? “Stop whining and let’s raisin the fun!”
Why did the apricot become a comedian? Because it knew how to deliver the perfect pun-chline!
What did the apricot say to the peach at the party? “We make a great “fruity” duo!”
How did the apricot apologize to the peach? It said, “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to be so fruity!”
What did the apricot say when it saw the peach? “You’re such a peach, I’m feeling a-peach-iated!”
Why did the apricot turn red? Because it saw the peach blushing!
How do apricots stay in shape? They “peach” themselves a good workout routine!
Why did the apricot go to the beach? Because it wanted to soak up the sun and get a nice tan!
What do you get when you cross an apricot with a computer? A fruit that can process data and calculations at incredible speeds – an aprico-turbo!
Why did the apricot go to the doctor? It wasn’t “feeling peachy” and needed a check-up!
Why was the apricot always happy? Because it found its perfect peach!
What did one apricot say to the other in math class? We make a great pear… uh, I mean pair!
Why was the apricot feeling down? Because it couldn’t find its other apricot half!
How do you make an apricot giggle? Tick-le its pit!
Why did the apricot become a detective? It had a knack for “fruitful” investigations!
What did the apricot say to the apple? You’re the apple of my eye…but I’m still the apricot of your dreams!
Why did the apricot turn red? Because it saw the apple blushing and wanted to join in!
Why was the apricot sad? It had low self-esteem and couldn’t find its apricotiation!
What did the apricot say to the cherry? “You’re the cherry on top, but I’m the apricot of the orchard!”
What did the apricot say to the plum? “You’re plum-tastic!”
How do you catch an apricot? With your bear hands!
Why did the apricot join a band? It wanted to be the lead singer in a “fruit” ensemble!
What do you call an apricot who is always watching movies? A popcorn-ricot!
Why was the apricot always so calm? Because it knew how to stay “apri-cool” in any situation!
What did the apricot say to the peach? “You’re looking quite “a-peeling” today!”

Apricot Jokes for Kids

Apricot jokes for kids are like the magical unicorns of the joke world—charming, whimsical, and sure to make the little ones beam with delight.

These jokes inspire kids to engage in playful thinking and explore the fun side of language, instilling a love for humor that’s as sweet as the fruit itself.

Moreover, apricot jokes for kids also have the wonderful advantage of making healthy eating entertaining, transforming that orange bite on their plate into a wellspring of giggles.

Are you ready for some innocent merriment?

Here are the jokes that’ll have them chuckling over their fruit cup:

How do you make an apricot giggle? Tickle it until it says “peach”!
Why did the apricot take a ladder to school? Because it wanted to reach high-peach!
Why did the apricot go to the beach? Because it wanted to catch some rays!
What did the apricot say to the orange? Stop “peeling” around and let’s be friends!
How do you fix a broken apricot? With a fruit band-aid, of course!
How do apricots get around? They ride on the fruit train!
Why was the apricot always smiling? Because it had a “pit”-iful sense of humor!
Why did the apricot get a sunburn? Because it couldn’t find any shade-ricots!
How do apricots clean themselves? They take a fruit shower!
How did the apricot feel when it won the race? Peachy keen!
What’s an apricot’s favorite superhero? Captain Apricot!
What did the apricot say to the peach? Let’s make a fruitylicious team!
What’s an apricot’s favorite sport? Pits-tennis!
How did the apricot feel after winning the race? Peachy-keen!
What did the apricot say to the peach? Let’s fruitfully collaborate!
Why was the apricot so good at math? It knew all the apricot-metric formulas.
What do you call an apricot that is always telling jokes? A pun-ricot!
What did the apricot say to the peach? “Let’s keep things “fruitful”!
What do you get if you cross an apricot with a pineapple? A fruit salad that’s positively tropical.
Why was the apricot always so sweet? Because it had a great sense of “a-peel”!
What did the apricot say to the peach? Let’s have an “apeach” of apricot pie!
Why was the apricot blushing? Because it saw the peach in a swimsuit!
What did the apricot say to the banana? Orange you glad we’re not bananas?
Why did the apricot start a band? Because it wanted to be part of a “jam” session!
Why was the apricot always so friendly? Because it couldn’t find a pit to be sour about!
Why was the apricot always in a hurry? Because it didn’t want to be late for the jam session!
Why did the apricot bring a ladder to the party? Because it wanted to reach new heights of fun!
Why was the apricot always sunbathing? It wanted to become a golden fruit!
What do you call an apricot that’s being sneaky? A fruit ninja!
How did the apricot get to be so sweet? It had a jam-packed schedule!
What’s an apricot’s favorite music genre? Rock-a-fruit!
Why did the apricot go to the movies? Because it wanted to see an apricot-tion film!
Why did the apricot get a sunburn? Because it forgot to wear its sunscreen lotion.
Why did the apricot refuse to play hide and seek? It didn’t want to get jammed in a tight spot!
What did the apricot say to the orange? “You’re appealing, but I’m apricot-ting!”
What do you call an apricot that loves to dance? A fruit with moves!
What did the apricot say to the strawberry? Let’s “jam” together and make some sweet music!
Why did the apricot go to the disco? It wanted to show off its fruity moves!
What did the apricot say to its friend? I’m “fruit-ful” of happiness when we hang out!
What do you call an apricot that goes on a journey? A globe-trotting fruit!
Why did the apricot go to the party? Because it heard there would be lots of peaches!
What did the apricot say to the peach? “You’re a-peach-ing to me!”
Why did the apricot always win at poker? Because it was a great fruit bluffer!
What do you call an apricot that goes to college? A smart fruit!
Why did the apricot go to the beach? Because it wanted to become a sun-dried fruit!
What do you call an apricot that is afraid of everything? A scaredy-fruit!
How did the apricot fix its car? It used a “peach wrench”!
Why did the apricot run out of the grocery store? Because it couldn’t find its pit-cher!
What did the apricot say to the peach? Let’s make the fruit bowl peachy keen!
What do you get when you cross an apricot with a math problem? A fruity solution!
Why was the apricot so good at math? It never needed to count to peach!
Why was the apricot late for the party? It couldn’t find its apricoat!
How do apricots communicate? Through “snack-erphone”!
What did the apricot say to the pineapple? You’re so sweet, you’re like a tropical apricot!
What’s an apricot’s favorite exercise? “Jumping jacks”!
What do you get if you cross an apricot with a computer? A fruit that can crunch numbers!
How do you catch a runaway apricot? Hide in an apricot tree and make a fruity noise!
Why did the apricot take a vacation? Because it needed to pit-stop and relax!
What do you get when you cross an apricot and a watermelon? A fruit salad with a surprise!
Why did the apricot run for president? It wanted to be the leader of the fruit nation!
Why did the apricot run away from the banana? It didn’t want to be a fruit split.
How did the apricot feel after running a marathon? Absolutely peachy!
Why did the apricot always win at sports? It had good apricot-tude!
What did the apricot say to the orange? Don’t you think we make a great fruit salad duo?
Why was the apricot running around the kitchen? It wanted to be a jammin’ fruit.
How do you make an apricot laugh? Tickle its peel-y funny bone.
Why did the apricot join the band? Because it had great “jamming” skills!
What did the apricot say to the peach? I’m a-peach-iate you!
Why did the apricot go to the doctor? Because it wasn’t feeling a-peach-ative!
What did the apricot say to the orange? Let’s stick together and make a fruity friendship!
What did the apricot say when it fell off the tree? “A plummeting experience!”
How does an apricot answer the phone? “Orange you glad you called?”
How do you make an apricot giggle? Tick-lemon it!
What do you call a funny apricot? A “joke-a-cot”!
Why was the apricot always happy? Because it had a peachy outlook on life!

Apricot Jokes for Adults

Who believes that adults can’t get a kick out of a clever apricot joke?

Apricot jokes for adults elevate the humor, melding refined wit with a hint of sassiness.

Just like a delightfully sweet and tangy apricot jam, these jokes mix components of comedy, wisdom, and a sprinkle of mischief for a truly memorable chuckle.

These jokes are ideal for cocktail parties, afternoon tea gatherings, or simply to add a bit of fun to a heavy discussion among friends.

Here are some apricot jokes that are perfectly juicy for adults:

What did the apricot say to the peach? You’re my main squeeze!
What did one apricot say to the other? “I’m pit-ifully in love with you”!
Why did the apricot become a comedian? Because it wanted to crack people up like a nut!
Why did the apricot become a stand-up comedian? It wanted to bring a little zest to the fruit world with its apricot-tastic jokes!
Why did the apricot go to school? To learn how to preserve its knowledge!
Why did the apricot refuse to fight? It didn’t want to end up in a sticky situation!
Why did the apricot become a professional basketball player? It had a great sense of apricot-iation!
Why did the apricot break up with the watermelon? It couldn’t seed a future together!
Why did the apricot break up with the plum? They just couldn’t find common pit-terest!
Why did the apricot join a gym? It wanted to get in peach-perfect shape.
What did the apricot say to the cherry? You’re so pitted!
Why did the apricot blush? It accidentally slipped on a banana peel!
What do you get when you cross an apricot with a comedian? A fruit that’s always cracking jokes!
Why did the apricot get in trouble with the law? It was caught jay-walking to the orchard!
Why did the apricot become an actor? It had a natural talent for playing fruity characters!
What did the apricot say to the peach at the party? Let’s salsa and make fruit punch!
What did the apricot say to the apple? “You’re a great core-worker!”
Why did the apricot get promoted? It had a fruitful career!
How did the apricot feel after its workout? “Ab-ricot-olutely fabulous!”
Why did the apricot blush at the party? It couldn’t stop being the “center-peach”!
Why did the apricot take up meditation? It wanted to be more centered and pit free!
What did the apricot say to its friend? “I’m feeling a bit dried up today, can you juice me up?”
Why did the apricot go to the beach? To get a “tan-gible” experience!
Why did the apricot refuse to run for office? It didn’t want to be associated with any fruitless endeavors!
What do you call a hilarious apricot? A “crack-a-pit” comedian!
Why was the apricot upset with the orange? It was too citrus-ly focused!
What’s an apricot’s favorite exercise? The “squatsquat” – it keeps their pits in shape!
Why did the apricot take a vacation? It needed to escape from the fruit bowl drama.
Why did the apricot bring a ladder to the party? It wanted to “climb” the social fruit ladder!
What did the apricot say to the apple tree? “Can I join your circle? I’m feeling fruity too!”
Why did the apricot break up with the banana? It couldn’t peel the love anymore!
What did the apricot say to the peach at the party? “Let’s have a jammin’ time!”
What did the apricot say to its date? You’re the zest thing that’s ever happened to me!
Why did the apricot turn red? It saw the lemon stealing the spotlight.
Why did the apricot go to therapy? It couldn’t get out of its jam.
How did the apricot apologize to the orange? It said, “I’m sorry for being a little fruity!”
Why did the apricot get a divorce? It couldn’t find its perfect halve-s!
What do you call an apricot that doesn’t like to share? A fruit hoarder!
How did the apricot feel after winning the lottery? Peachy keen!
Why did the apricot break up with the peach? It found someone juicier!
Why did the apricot blush? It saw the other fruits making juicy comments!
What did the apricot say when it won the lottery? I’m a millionaire now, I’m feeling peachy!
What do you call an apricot that’s in denial? A “fruit”itionist.
What do you call an apricot with a great sense of humor? A real “pit” comedian!
How does an apricot get around town? It takes the jam-packed bus!
What do you call an apricot that’s been working out? A well-peached fruit!
Why did the apricot always win at poker? It had a great poker face… or maybe it was just a fruit bluff!
Why did the apricot get a job as a lifeguard? It was tired of just being a fruit and wanted to save some lives!
What did the apricot say when it found out it was going to be turned into jam? “Well, that’s just peachy!”
Why did the apricot turn down the invitation to the party? It didn’t want to pit-ifully embarrass itself!
Why did the apricot break up with the peach? It couldn’t withstand the pits of jealousy!
Why was the apricot feeling self-conscious? It thought it was too much of a peach wannabe!
What’s an apricot’s favorite exercise? “Fruit-ups”!
What did the apricot say to the peach? “You’re peachy keen, but I’m apricot-tastic!”
Why did the apricot invite its friends over for a movie night? It wanted to hear them say, “Apricot-iate the film choice!”
Why did the apricot refuse to play cards? It didn’t want to gamble with its pits!
Why did the apricot become an artist? It loved painting still life portraits of itself!
Why did the apricot become an actor? It wanted to be the star of the fruit bowl!
What did the apricot do when it won the lottery? It went on a tropical vacation to escape its jam-packed life!
Why was the apricot always the life of the party? It had a zest for life!
What did the apricot say to its friend who wasn’t paying attention? “Hey, apricot-iate me, will ya?”
Why was the apricot always so sad? Because it never found its perfect pear!
Why don’t apricots have a big social circle? They’re quite selective and only hang out with peachy individuals!
What do you call an apricot with a sunburn? A little too peachy!
Why did the apricot refuse to fight? It was too soft on the inside!
Why did the apricot refuse to fight? It believed in peace, love, and jamminess!
Why did the apricot refuse to fight in the boxing ring? It was afraid of getting jammed!
What did the apricot say to the cherry? Stop being so cherry-ful all the time!
Why did the apricot start a band? It wanted to make some jamming tunes for all the fruit lovers out there!
Why did the apricot attend a business seminar? It wanted to learn how to be a real apricot-preneur!
What did the apricot say when it won the lottery? I’m going to invest in a peachy future!
Why was the apricot feeling self-conscious? It couldn’t find its “apri-spot”!
What did the apricot say at the beach? “I’m ready to hit the sand and become a fruity tan!”
What did the apricot say to the blender? “Don’t pul-verize me, bro!”
What did the apricot say when it saw the peach? “Hey, you’re looking peachy keen today!”
Why did the apricot break up with the peach? They just couldn’t find the right fruit chemistry!
What did the apricot say to the grape? You raisin my standards!
What did the apricot say to the apple at the fruit party? “Orange you glad I’m here?”
What did the apricot say to the orange when they were late for the meeting? “Sorry, we got jammed up!”
Why did the apricot break up with the watermelon? It couldn’t stand its seedless jokes!
What did the apricot say to the prune? Stop raisin’ the bar!
Why did the apricot refuse to fight the cherry in a boxing match? Because it didn’t want to get pitted!
What did the apricot say to its friend who was feeling down? You’re the zest to my fruit salad!
How do you make an apricot laugh? Just give it a good tickle with a feather!
Why did the apricot get promoted? Because it had all the right juice!
What do you call a clumsy apricot? A total fruitcake!
What did the apricot say to the pineapple during their vacation? “I’m loving this tropical apricot-getaway!”
Why did the apricot join the gym? It wanted to stay fit and juicy!
Why did the apricot bring a ladder to the orchard? To reach for the stars!
Why did the apricot file a police report? It was “peach”-napped by a mischievous plum!
Why did the apricot break up with the peach? It couldn’t find any common pit-terests!
Why did the apricot go to therapy? It had an identity crisis with the peach and plum!
Why did the apricot get a fancy car? It wanted to drive a fruit-omobile!
Why did the apricot make a great comedian? It always had the perfect punchline!
What did the apricot say to the peach? “You’re not as sweet as me, but we make a good jam!”
Why did the apricot take a nap during the day? It wanted to become a night-cot!
What do you call an apricot that’s a fantastic dancer? A smoothie mover!
How did the apricot become the life of the party? It learned all the “peachy” dance moves!
What did the apricot say to the raisin? “You’re just a dried-up grape!”
What did the apricot say to the grapefruit? “You’re such a citrus tease!”
What do you call an apricot that can sing? A “peach” perfect performer!
Why did the apricot refuse to play hide-and-seek? It didn’t want to be a “stone fruit”!
What did the apricot say to the peach? Let’s make a fruit salad and “raisin” the roof!
What’s an apricot’s favorite way to communicate? Emoji-cots!
Why did the apricot break up with the orange? They had too much zest for each other!
Why did the apricot always win at card games? It had a great “apricot” of winning strategies!
Why did the apricot get in trouble at school? It couldn’t stop cracking jokes during the class!
Why did the apricot go to the gym? It wanted to be a lean, mean, fruit machine!
What do you call an apricot that’s always in a hurry? A fast fruit!
Why did the apricot become a comedian? It wanted to be known as the funniest fruit in the bowl!
Why did the apricot turn down a date with the peach? It didn’t want to pit itself against a fuzzy competitor.
Why did the apricot go to the disco? It wanted to dance the night away!
What did the apricot say when it got a promotion at work? “I’m on the top of the fruit chain now!”
Why did the apricot break up with the plum? It couldn’t get past their pits!

Apricot Joke Generator

Finding the sweet spot in apricot humor can be quite a daunting task.

(Get it?

Sweet spot?)

That’s where our FREE Apricot Joke Generator comes into play.

Engineered to amalgamate juicy puns, succulent humor, and tangy catchphrases, it generates jokes that are sure to tickle your funny bone.

Don’t let your humor wither and become bland.

Use our joke generator to whip up jokes that are as fresh and vibrant as your apricots.

FAQs About Apricot Jokes

Why are apricot jokes appreciated?

Apricot jokes are appreciated because they’re sweet, yet unexpected.

They take a common and loved fruit and turn it into a source of humor, often using puns and wordplay.

Apricot jokes bring a sense of fun to any conversation, making them a delightful pick for fruit lovers and humor enthusiasts alike.

Can apricot jokes be used in social situations?

Definitely!

Apricot jokes are a great way to add a touch of humor to a conversation.

Whether you’re at a party, dinner, or just hanging out with friends, an apricot joke can bring a smile to everyone’s face and make you the life of the party.

How can I create my own apricot jokes?

Start by learning about apricots—their characteristics, how they are used in cooking, their color and taste, and so on.
Look for words related to apricots (e.g., pit, stone fruit, preserve) that could be used in a pun or a play on words.
Consider the context of your joke. Is it related to cooking, eating, shopping for groceries? Use this context to shape your humor.
Get creative with well-known phrases or sayings, and incorporate apricot-related words or themes into them.
Don’t forget to embrace puns and wordplay. Apricot jokes are perfect for a good pun!

Are there any tips for remembering apricot jokes?

Remembering apricot jokes can be easier if you associate them with specific occasions or activities, like preparing a fruit salad, eating an apricot, or shopping for fresh produce.

This way, whenever you encounter these situations, the jokes will naturally come to mind.