674 Canadian Football Jokes to Score Major Laughs

If you’ve landed here, it means you’re ready to touchdown in the world of Canadian football jokes.

Not just any jokes, but the most valuable plays.

That’s why we’ve huddled up a list of the most hilarious Canadian football jokes.

From end zone puns to high-octane one-liners, our compilation has a joke for every quarter of the game.

So, let’s rush into the heart of Canadian football humour, one joke at a time.

Canadian Football Jokes

Canadian Football jokes truly encapsulate the spirit of this fun-loving nation’s favorite pastime.

These jokes are not just about the game, but also about the uniquely Canadian culture that surrounds it, from the larger football to the 110-yard field.

Creating a great Canadian Football joke involves a play on words, a touch of good-natured ribbing, and a deep understanding of the sport’s quirks (like those 3 downs instead of 4, or the infamous rouge).

Ready to run into the end zone of humor?

Get ready to tackle some laughs with these Canadian Football jokes:

  • Why don’t Canadian football players wear perfume? Because it’s a penalty to have too many scents on the field!
  • Why did the Canadian football team always bring syrup to the game? To “stick” to the field and avoid getting tackled!
  • What’s the difference between a Canadian football player and a magician? One performs tricks on the field, and the other pulls rabbits out of hats!
  • Why did the Canadian football team start a band? Because they heard they had the best “rush” on the field!
  • What do you call a Canadian football player with no hands or feet? Useless on the field, but great at “kicking” back and watching the game!
  • Why did the Canadian football team only have half a field? Because they wanted to practice their punting!
  • Why did the Canadian football team go to the bank during halftime? They wanted to get their quarterback some change!
  • Why did the Canadian football team have a hard time playing in the rain? Because they couldn’t pass without slipping on the “eh” grass!
  • Why did the Canadian football team hire a chef? To make sure they always had a good pass-ta game plan!
  • Why did the Canadian football team hire a baker as their coach? Because he knew how to knead the dough and make a good roll-out play!
  • Why did the Canadian football team always bring a broom to the game? To sweep away the competition, of course!
  • Why did the Canadian football team’s mascot become a comedian? Because they wanted to score laughs as well as touchdowns!
  • What do you call a Canadian football player who makes a great catch? A good receiver, eh?
  • Why do Canadian football players make terrible comedians? Their punts always fall flat!
  • What do you call it when a Canadian football team’s quarterback gets tackled in the endzone? A “touch-downer”!
  • Why did the Canadian football team start a garden? Because they wanted to grow their own field goals!
  • What do you call a Canadian football player who loses his pants during a game? A wide-receiver!
  • Why was the Canadian football game canceled? It was snow joke, eh!
  • What do you call a Canadian football player with a broken leg? A limp-ire!
  • Why was the Canadian football team always cold? Because they were always in the Great White North!
  • Why did the Canadian football team go to the bakery before the game? They needed some “roll outs”!
  • Why did the Canadian football team always bring a watermelon to the game? Because they wanted to have a fruitful season!
  • Why did the Canadian football team install a mirror on the field? So they could practice their self-reflection penalties!
  • What do you call a Canadian football team that can’t stop arguing? A bunch of fumble-ehs!
  • Why did the Canadian football team invent a new play called the “Maple Leaf”? Because it always falls to the ground gracefully!
  • What did the Canadian football player say when his teammate asked for advice? “Huddle up and I’ll tackle the problem!”
  • What do you call a Canadian football team with no fans? A first downer!
  • Why did the Canadian football team start a band? Because they wanted to march down the field to the beat of their own drum!
  • What do Canadian football players do when they forget something? They apologize for the incomplete pass!
  • Why are Canadian football fields so wet? Because all the players keep passing the puck!
  • How do Canadian football players stay cool during the game? They always stay close to the fans!
  • What do you call a Canadian football player who can throw a perfect spiral? A rare sighting!
  • Why did the Canadian football team’s quarterback bring a pillow to the game? He wanted to have a “soft” landing when he got sacked!
  • Why did the Canadian football coach bring a ladder to the game? So his team could finally reach the end zone!
  • Why was the Canadian football team always hungry? Because they could never find the end zone!
  • What’s a Canadian football player’s favorite type of math? Touchdowns and conversions!
  • Why did the Canadian football team’s coach bring a map to the game? He wanted to find a better route to the end zone!
  • What did the Canadian football coach say to the clock? “We can’t stop until we beat the second hand!”
  • Why did the Canadian football team only bring one shoe to the game? Because they heard they could only make one good foot-ball!
  • What did the Canadian football player say when he scored a touchdown? “Eh, I guess I’ll just take the extra point!”
  • Why did the Canadian football player bring an umbrella to the game? In case it started raining touchdowns!
  • What do you call a Canadian football player who’s always borrowing money? A Canadian loanback!
  • Why did the Canadian football team go to the bakery before the game? They needed a good roll out of the oven for their running back!
  • What do you call a Canadian football player who always wins at poker? A royal flush rusher!
  • Why did the Canadian football team always carry a ladder onto the field? They were aiming for a higher yardage!
  • Why did the football coach take the team to the bakery? He wanted them to have a good roll out!
  • Why don’t Canadian football players drink tea? Because the Canadian tea-m is on the field!
  • What do Canadian football players use to pay for their meals? Loonie-tickets!
  • Why did the Canadian football team wear mittens during the game? To keep their hands warm for a good handshake after the match!
  • Why did the Canadian football team have a hard time getting new players? Because nobody could resist their “eh”-ffensive tactics!
  • Why don’t Canadian football players ever get sunburned? Because they always stay in the shade of the goalposts!
  • What did the Canadian football player say to the referee who made a bad call? “Sorry, but you must be a bit ice-hockey blind!”
  • Why do Canadian football players make terrible comedians? Because they always fumble their punchlines!
  • What do Canadian football players use to catch a pass? A maple “leaf”!
  • Why was the Canadian football player such a good quarterback? Because he always knew how to “pass” the time!
  • What did the Canadian football say when it scored a touchdown? Eh, it’s about time, eh?
  • What do you call a Canadian football team that always loses? The Eh-cursed!
  • Why did the Canadian football team hire a baker? Because they needed someone to help them score more turnovers!
  • What’s a Canadian football player’s favorite type of footwear? Cleats, eh!
  • Why don’t Canadian football players drink tea? Because the other team would think it’s a timeout!
  • What do you call a Canadian football player who’s always on time? A rare sight, eh?
  • What do you call a Canadian football player who can tackle but can’t catch? An incomplete Canadian!
  • What do Canadian football players wear to stay warm during the game? Toques and “eh”-rmuffs!
  • What did the Canadian football say to the quarterback after he threw a bad pass? “Sorry, that was a real ‘eh’-rrant throw!”
  • Why did the Canadian football team invite their grandmothers to the game? Because they wanted to show them how to do a proper end zone dance!
  • What do Canadian football players say after winning the game? “We gave it our ‘eh’-ll!”
  • What do Canadian football players eat before a big game? Puck-eroni pizza!
  • Why did the Canadian football team start a band? Because they wanted to have a good defense and a great bass-line!
  • Why was the Canadian football field always so muddy? Because the players kept shouting, “Dirt-y, eh?”
  • What did the Canadian football coach say to his team after they won the championship? “Good job, eh!”
  • Why did the Canadian football team’s defense always eat popcorn during the game? They loved the sound of the quarterback getting “crunched” on every play!
  • What do you call a Canadian football team that can’t score? The punt-erable offense!
  • What did the Canadian football player say to his coach after the game? Sorry, I dropped the ball, eh?
  • Why did the Canadian football team hire a musician? Because they needed someone to help with their offensive beats!
  • Why did the Canadian football team go to the bakery before the big game? Because they wanted a fresh roll-out strategy!
  • Why did the Canadian football team bring sandwiches to the game? Because they heard the opposing team was excellent at tackling!
  • Why did the Canadian football player bring a ladder to the game? Because he heard the quarterback wanted to pass the ball!
  • Why did the Canadian football team hire a baker as their coach? Because they kneaded a good strategy!
  • What do you call a Canadian football player who can run faster than the speed of sound? A blur-eh!
  • Why did the Canadian football team bring a whistle to the game? To give the other team a fair chance of blowing it!
  • Why don’t Canadian football players like baking? Because they don’t knead any turnovers!
  • What do you call a Canadian football player who can’t stop dancing? The end-zone boogie!
  • Why did the Canadian football team always bring a map to the game? So they could navigate their way through the extra yards!
  • Why did the Canadian football team bring a camera to the game? Because they wanted to capture all the tackles on tape, eh?
  • Why did the Canadian football player go to school early? He wanted to “eh”-rrive before the first bell!
  • Why don’t Canadian football teams like using elevators? They prefer to always take the high road!
  • What do Canadian football players use to navigate? A touchdown GPS!
  • Why did the Canadian football player become a chef? Because he knew how to perfectly execute a play!
  • How do Canadian football players listen to music? They use their “eh” pods!
  • What do you call it when a Canadian football player loses his jersey? A case of the missing “eh”!
  • Why was the Canadian football team always so cold during games? Because they always had “ice” in their veins!
  • Why was the Canadian football field always wet? Because there were too many “eh-cos” on the field!
  • What do you call a Canadian football player who accidentally trips over the yard line? A penalty flag-ger!
  • Why did the Canadian football team refuse to play on the international stage? They were afraid of getting flagged for excessive politeness!
  • Why did the Canadian football player bring a spoon to the game? Because he heard they were playing with a soup-er bowl!
  • Why did the Canadian football team always bring extra jerseys to the game? In case they needed to apologize for their tackles!
  • What did one Canadian football say to the other after winning the game? “We really tackled that victory, eh!”
  • Why did the Canadian football team always order takeout during halftime? Because they preferred the “eh”-delivery option!
  • What do you call a Canadian football player who brings an umbrella to the game? Prepared for a “passing” shower!
  • Why did the Canadian football team bring a map to the game? They wanted to make sure they scored in the right end zone!
  • Why did the Canadian football player bring a pillow to the game? So he could dream about scoring a touchdown!
  • Why do Canadian football players bring a compass to the game? So they know which way the goal is, eh!
  • Why did the Canadian football player bring a ladder to the game? Because he heard the competition was fierce and he wanted to be ahead of the game!
  • What do you call a Canadian football player who can kick a field goal from anywhere on the field? The bootlegger!
  • What do you call a Canadian football player who brings a map to the game? Lost in the “eh-zone”!
  • How did the Canadian football team win the championship? By scoring more “eh”-points than their opponents!
  • What did the Canadian football player say to his coach after a big win? “I guess you could say we scored a “toque”-down!”
  • Why was the Canadian football team always cold? They always played in the frosty end zone.
  • Why did the Canadian football team wear sunglasses during the game? Because they heard there would be a lot of sun(downs)!
  • What do you call a Canadian football player who is constantly in the penalty box? A flag enthusiast!
  • Why was the Canadian football coach so good at gardening? He knew how to plant a great quarterback!
  • Why do Canadian football players do well in school? Because they know how to tackle their studies!
  • Why did the football player bring string to the game? Because he wanted to play “catch” with the Canadian rules!
  • What did the Canadian football coach say to the losing team? “Sorry, eh? Better luck next time!”
  • What do you call it when a Canadian football team’s offense is really bad? A “punt-astrophe”!
  • Why did the Canadian football team bring a ladder to the game? So they could finally get over the goal line!
  • Why did the Canadian football player join the circus? He wanted to be a “tight-end” rope walker!
  • How did the Canadian football team make sure they had enough fans at the game? They offered free toques at the entrance!
  • Why did the Canadian football team only use 5 players? Because they heard the other team was a bunch of punts!
  • Why did the Canadian football team always practice yoga before the game? To improve their flexibility and avoid roughing the passer!
  • What did the Canadian football coach say to the running back? “Don’t be a fumble-ina!”
  • What did the Canadian football coach say to the team before the game? “Let’s give ’em a good ‘eh’ game, boys!”
  • Why did the Canadian football team get new uniforms? Because their old ones were too lacrosse!

 

Short Canadian Football Jokes

Short Canadian football jokes are like a perfectly executed touchdown—unexpected, entertaining, and full of charm.

These jokes are perfect for sharing during a game, on social media, or to break the ice at a sports-themed gathering.

The magic of short Canadian football jokes lies in their ability to combine sports trivia with a touch of wit, delivering a hearty chuckle in just a punchline or two.

So, ready to huddle up?

Here are some short Canadian football jokes that are guaranteed to score a laugh.

  • The tackle butterfly!
  • Why do Canadian football players like gardening? They enjoy sacking the quarterback!
  • Because he wanted to find the end zone!
  • What do Canadian football players do during halftime?
  • Why do Canadian football players love math?
  • He knew how to tackle the punchline!
  • Why do Canadian football players love math? They always tackle the problems!
  • Because he wanted to reel in a touchdown!
  • What do Canadian football players use to measure their field?
  • He wanted to reach new heights!
  • To reach the goal line!
  • What’s a Canadian football player’s favorite kind of soup?
  • Because they always want to score a “two-point conversion”!
  • Why was the Canadian football team so good at math?
  • Because he heard they kneaded more dough!
  • What do Canadian football players use to fix their uniforms? Touchdown tape!
  • He wanted to tie up the score!
  • Why do Canadian football fans always carry a flashlight?
  • A meter, eh?
  • Why don’t Canadian football players wear headphones? They already have wide receivers!
  • Touchdownuts!
  • What do Canadian football players use to go fishing? Linemen nows!
  • Because he needed help with the “eh-dvantage”!
  • Why did the Canadian football team wear headphones during the game?
  • To listen to their favorite tunes while they tackled the competition!
  • Because they want to shed some light on the game!
  • In case they needed to dig deep for a touchdown!
  • They knew how to convert yards into touchdowns!
  • What do Canadian football players wear on cold days? Touchdown jackets!
  • Because they love making smoothies out of the competition!
  • What’s a Canadian football player’s favorite type of dance? The touchdown shuffle!
  • Why don’t Canadian football teams make good comedians? They fumble too much!
  • Because he knew all the tricks for a winning season!
  • Touchdowns and a lot of yardage!
  • Why was the Canadian football player such a good comedian?
  • Because they wanted to tackle some books!
  • Because they wanted to reach the Grey Cup!
  • What do Canadian football players wear to bed? Pajama Jersies!
  • To get a good roll!
  • A quarterback!
  • Tack-lentil!
  • What’s a Canadian football player’s favorite animal? A touchdowning beaver!
  • Why don’t Canadian football players drink tea? Because they prefer touchdowns!
  • What do Canadian football players wear during a blizzard? CFLurry jackets!
  • Why don’t Canadians play American football? They prefer “eh” formations!
  • What do Canadian football players bring to a picnic?
  • What’s a Canadian football player’s favorite dessert? Maple touch-downuts!
  • They take a maple syrup break!
  • Why did the Canadian football coach take his team to the bakery?
  • Because they wanted to dig deep for a victory!
  • Because they wanted to camp out in the end zone!
  • To get some turnovers!

 

Canadian Football Jokes One-Liners

Canadian football one-liner jokes are the embodiment of humor packed into a solitary sentence.

They’re the verbal equivalent of scoring a touchdown in one swift play – exhilarating, clean, and impressively skillful.

Creating a perfect one-liner demands a mixture of creativity, accuracy, and an in-depth understanding of the game’s intricate details.

The challenge lies in compressing the setup and the punchline into a streamlined form, delivering the strongest punch with the least amount of words.

Here’s to hoping these Canadian football one-liners have you tackling laughter with every read:

  • Why do Canadian football teams bring extra pairs of pants to games? Because they’re always ready for a boot-y call!
  • What do you call a Canadian football player who doesn’t shower? A dirty Roughrider!
  • Why did the Canadian football team start a bakery? Because they knew they could always knead the dough!
  • Why did the Canadian football team open a pet store? Because they wanted to tackle all the competition!
  • What do you call a Canadian football player who can’t stop eating? A wide re-cheeseburger!
  • Why did the Canadian football team hire a comedian as their coach? Because they wanted someone who could deliver a good punchline!
  • Why did the Canadian football player bring a telescope to the game? So he could see the goal posts from far away!
  • Why did the Canadian football team start a fashion line? Because they wanted to tackle the latest trends!
  • Why did the Canadian football team bring a map to the game? Because they heard they needed to go for a “2-point conversion!”
  • What do you call a Canadian football player who wins a championship? A maple MVP!
  • Why don’t Canadian football players drink tea? Because the Americans have all the cups!
  • What do you call a Canadian football player with a great sense of humor? A punting comedian!
  • Why did the Canadian football team bring a map to the game? Because they couldn’t find the end zone without it.
  • Why did the Canadian football team hire a juggler as their running back? Because they wanted someone who could handle the ball and entertain the crowd!
  • Why did the Canadian football player become a gardener? Because he wanted to tackle daisies instead of opponents!
  • What did the Canadian football player say to the vending machine? Give me my quarter back!
  • Why did the Canadian football team hire a detective? They needed someone to find their missing touchdowns.
  • Why did the Canadian football team bring a mirror to the game? So they could reflect on their strategies!
  • Why was the Canadian football team always late for practice? They kept getting stuck at the border.
  • Why did the Canadian football team become detectives? Because they loved to intercept the ball!
  • Why did the Canadian football team invite a magician to practice? Because they needed someone to help them disappear in the playoffs!
  • Why don’t Canadian football players wear helmets? They prefer to protect their maple syrup-filled heads.
  • What did the Canadian football coach say when asked about his team’s losing streak? “We’re just trying to find the end zone, but it feels like we’re stuck in the penalty box!”
  • Why did the Canadian football team invite a comedian to their practice? They needed some comic relief for their plays!
  • Why did the Canadian football player bring a barbecue to the game? He heard they were going to “grill” the competition!
  • Why did the Canadian football team bring their own ice to the game? They wanted to have a cool performance!
  • Why did the Canadian football team open a restaurant? Because they wanted to serve up some touchdown-worthy dishes!
  • Canadian football: Where touchdowns are worth six points, and apologies are worth ten.
  • In Canadian football, the players take a break every quarter to enjoy a nice cup of Tim Hortons coffee.
  • Why did the Canadian football team wear headphones on the field? Because they wanted to have great tunes over touchdowns!
  • Why did the Canadian football team bring a ladder to the game? Because they heard the quarterback was always throwing touchdowns!
  • What’s a Canadian football player’s favorite type of pass? A maple spiral.
  • Why did the Canadian football team switch their uniforms to plaid? Because they wanted to blend in with the fans and play undercover, eh!
  • Why did the Canadian football team hire a gardener? Because they wanted to plant their offense!
  • Why did the Canadian football team hire a magician? They needed someone to help them pull off a “trick play”!
  • Why do Canadian football players make bad comedians? Because their jokes always go wide right!
  • Why was the Canadian football team always so hot? Because they always threw a lot of passes!
  • Why did the Canadian football team bring a chef to the game? Because they heard the opposing team was serving up a healthy serving of humble pie!
  • Why did the Canadian football team start a dance troupe? Because they wanted to score some touchdown dances!
  • Why did the Canadian football coach go to the airport? To pick up a new quarterback who had arrived on a different “flight”!
  • What do you get when you mix Canadian football with a circus? A touchdown under the big top!
  • Why did the Canadian football player bring a snow shovel to practice? To clear a path to the end zone!
  • What do you call a Canadian football player with a sheep on his head? A wooly receiver!
  • Why do Canadian football players make good comedians? Because they’re always up for a good punt line.
  • What do you call a Canadian football player who takes his girlfriend to a game? A player with a date!
  • Why did the Canadian football team open a bakery? Because they were tired of getting bread by the other team!
  • Why did the Canadian football team always have a party after a game? Because they loved to celebrate with a “touchdown dance!”
  • Why did the Canadian football team switch to using only inflatable balls? Because they wanted a more “air”-y offense!
  • Why did the Canadian football team always carry a compass during games? So they wouldn’t go offside!
  • Why did the Canadian football player bring a fan to the game? To keep cool under all that ice!
  • What’s the best thing about Canadian football? The players are always on a double-double mission.
  • Why did the Canadian football team invite a musician to their games? Because they wanted some good punts and groans!
  • Why don’t Canadian football players like using the internet? Because they can’t get past the wide receiver!
  • Canadian football: where the players apologize for tackling each other.
  • Why do Canadian football players make great comedians? Because they always know how to tackle a punchline!
  • What do Canadian football players do during halftime? They engage in a friendly game of curling.
  • Why did the Canadian football team hire a tailor? Because their uniforms were “eh”-ful!
  • What do you call a Canadian football player who can play multiple positions? A versatile igloo!
  • What did the Canadian football player say to the referee who made a bad call? “Eh, that was a boot-iful display of incompetence!”
  • What did the football coach say to the Canadian player who kept fumbling? “Eh, you gotta poutine more effort!”
  • Why did the Canadian football team invite a mathematician to their game? Because they needed someone to calculate their yardage!
  • Why did the Canadian football team’s mascot go to school? To improve his “cheer”leadership skills!
  • What do you call a Canadian football player with a shovel? A yard digger!
  • Why did the Canadian football player go to the bakery before the game? He wanted to score some “rolls”!
  • What do Canadian football players do when they win the championship? They pout their lips and say, “Sore-y, eh?”
  • What did the Canadian football player say when he scored a touchdown? “Sorry, eh! I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings!”
  • Why did the Canadian football player bring a flashlight to the game? Because he wanted to make sure he found the end zone!
  • Why don’t Canadian football players ever get lost on the field? Because they always stick to their maple roots!
  • Why did the Canadian football team start a gardening club? Because they needed to work on their turf management!
  • What do you call a Canadian football player who can walk on water? A miracle on ice!
  • What do you call a Canadian football player who can’t kick? A missed opportunity!
  • Why did the Canadian football team always bring a pencil to the game? Because they needed to draw up a lot of punts!
  • What did the football player say to the Canadian quarterback? “I’ll catch your passes, eh? Just don’t throw me a toque!”
  • Why did the Canadian football team invite a stand-up comedian to their game? They wanted to have a laughing stock!
  • Why did the Canadian football team bring a broom to the game? Because they wanted to clean up on the field!
  • Why did the Canadian football team bring a shovel to the game? Because they wanted to dig themselves out of a hole in the standings!
  • Canadian football: Where the fans cheer ‘eh-some!’ instead of ‘awesome!’.
  • What do you call a Canadian football player with no arms or legs? A first down!
  • Why did the Canadian football team go to the bakery before every game? To get their daily turnovers!
  • What do you call a Canadian football player who wears a cape? Superbowlman!
  • Canadian football: Where the players say ‘eh’ instead of ‘hut’ to start the play.
  • Why did the Canadian football team bring a boat to the game? In case they needed to punt on third down and long!
  • Why did the Canadian football team bring a deck of cards to the game? In case they needed a good handoff!
  • Why did the Canadian football team bring a snowplow to the game? They wanted to clear a path to victory.
  • I tried to join the Canadian football team, but they told me I was too much of a punt-omaniac!
  • Why did the Canadian football team hire a hypnotist? Because they wanted to put their opponents in a trance formation!
  • What do you call it when a Canadian football player accidentally catches the ball with their face? A touchdown-saving face mask penalty!
  • Why was the Canadian football team’s bus so quiet? Because they all lost their voice yelling “eh”!
  • Why did the Canadian football team always get lost on the way to the stadium? Because they kept going for the wrong goalposts!
  • Why did the Canadian football player become a baker? Because he loved to knead the competition!
  • Why did the Canadian football player bring a ladder to the game? Because he heard the tickets were up in the air!
  • Why did the Canadian football team bring a ladder to the game? Because they heard the quarterback had a high pass completion rate!
  • Canadian football: where the quarterbacks say “eh” instead of “hike”
  • Why don’t Canadian football players like to wear headphones? Because they prefer to receive passes instead of interceptions!
  • Why did the Canadian football team start a bakery? Because they wanted to knead the dough and roll over their opponents!
  • What’s the difference between Canadian football and a pancake? In Canadian football, the batter gets sacked!
  • What do you call a Canadian football player who doesn’t like to share? A selfish pass-er.
  • Why did the Canadian football player go on a diet? Because he wanted to be a lean, mean, scoring machine!
  • Why did the Canadian football player go to the dentist? He needed a little extra floss for his passing game!
  • Why did the Canadian football team always have a BBQ before games? To grill the competition!
  • Why did the Canadian football team bring a ladder to the game? Because they heard the competition was tough in the higher leagues!
  • What do you call a Canadian football player who can solve a Rubik’s Cube in under a minute? A quarterback with quick moves!
  • Why did the Canadian football team start a band? Because they wanted to score some touchdowns and hit all the right notes!
  • Why did the Canadian football player bring a pillow to the game? Because he wanted to catch some Z’s on the sideline!
  • Why did the Canadian football team hire a magician as their coach? Because he knew how to make a winning streak disappear!
  • What do you call a Canadian football player who loses his shoes? A de-feet-ed athlete!
  • Why did the Canadian football team open a comedy club? Because they loved to make the crowd “split the uprights” with laughter!
  • Canadian football: where a “Hail Mary” pass is just politely asking for divine intervention.
  • What did the Canadian football player say when asked if he wanted to be a running back? “Nah, I’d rather be a lumberjack and tackle trees!”
  • In Canadian football, the field goal posts say sorry every time they get hit.
  • Why did the Canadian football team hire a comedian as their kicker? Because he always made the crowd crack up when he missed!
  • What do you call a Canadian football player who can’t find his helmet? A quarterback without a clue!
  • What do you call a Canadian football player who can juggle? A multi-tackle player!
  • What do you call a Canadian football player who can’t catch a cold? A receiver with a bad case of the dropsies!
  • Why did the Canadian football team bring their own leaf blower to the game? Because they wanted to blow away the competition!
  • Why did the Canadian football player always bring an umbrella to the game? He heard it was a passing shower.
  • Why did the Canadian football team bring a deck of cards to the game? So they could shuffle the defense!
  • What do you call a Canadian football player who loves to garden? A touchdown to earth!
  • What did the Canadian football coach say to his team before the big game? “Get out there and be outstanding in your field!”
  • Why did the Canadian football team take a nap during the game? They were tired of being called the “Roughriders!”
  • Why did the Canadian football team go to the art museum? Because they wanted to brush up on their tackle technique!
  • In Canadian football, the players are so polite, they tackle you and then help you up to apologize.
  • Why did the Canadian football player bring a fan to the game? He wanted to make sure he had someone cheering for him.
  • Why did the Canadian football team bring a calculator to the game? Because they needed help with their quarterback rating!
  • Canadian football: Where the quarterback yells ‘Sorry!’ before throwing the ball.
  • Why did the Canadian football team have a successful season? Because they always had a “pass”ion for the game!
  • I asked the Canadian football player if he had a favorite punter. He said, “Yes, I have quite a foot fetish!”

 

Canadian Football Dad Jokes

Canadian Football dad jokes are an amazing mix of puns and humor that celebrate the uniquely Canadian version of this popular sport.

You might find them a little corny, but that’s exactly the point.

They are the perfect addition to your next tailgate party, a conversation starter during the game, or simply to put a smile on a fellow fan’s face.

Get ready for some hearty laughs and eye-rolling groans.

Here are some Canadian Football dad jokes that are sure to score a touchdown:

  • Why did the Canadian football team have a hard time keeping their uniforms clean? Because they were always tackling dirty plays!
  • Why did the Canadian football team start a construction company? Because they loved building Eh-xtra points!
  • Why don’t Canadian football players like driving on the highway? Because they always get flagged for excessive speeding!
  • Why don’t Canadian football players ever get lost? Because they always follow the Maple Leaf!
  • What did the football say to the Canadian player? I’m always rooting for you, eh!
  • Why did the Canadian football player bring a pencil to the game? He heard it was good for drawing up plays!
  • What do you call a Canadian football player with no hands? Still not as bad as the referees!
  • Why did the Canadian football team hire a gardener? Because they needed someone to help them tackle the turf and keep it in top shape!
  • Why did the Canadian football coach bring a ladder to practice? So the players could work on their “high” five!
  • Why did the Canadian football team have a hard time scoring? Because their offense was always getting flagged for holding!
  • Why did the Canadian football team always bring their own snacks? Because they didn’t want to fumble with the concession stand!
  • Why did the Canadian football team switch to using a bigger ball? Because they wanted to make a bigger impact on the field!
  • What position do Canadian football players play when they’re cold? Freezer back!
  • Why was the Canadian football field always so clean? Because the players always picked up the eh-rrant leaves!
  • Why did the football coach start a bakery? Because he knew how to make some great rolls on the field!
  • What do you call a Canadian football player who can’t stop eating? A wide receiver! They’re always hungry for the end zone!
  • Why don’t Canadian football players ever lose their balance? Because they’re always on the ball!
  • What do Canadian football players do when they can’t find their helmet? They look in the eh-bay!
  • What did the Canadian football say to the other football? Eh, let’s have a friendly match, eh?
  • Why did the Canadian football player bring a ladder to the game? So he could reach the CFL (Canadian Football League) cloud!
  • Why don’t Canadian football players need to bring their own paper towels? Because they already have Roughriders!
  • Why did the Canadian football team always bring a map to the game? So they wouldn’t get caught offside!
  • What do you call a Canadian football player who loves to knit? A tight-end with a stitch!
  • What do you call a Canadian football player who opens a bakery? A “touchdown” maker with pastries!
  • Why did the Canadian football team only bring one ear of corn to their game? Because one kernel is enough for a quarterback!
  • Why did the Canadian football team have a hard time playing cards? Because they always had trouble with the rush hour!
  • Why did the Canadian football team hire a comedian as their quarterback? Because he always threw great punchlines!
  • How do Canadian football players stay warm during the game? They huddle up in a maple syrup blanket!
  • Why did the Canadian football team’s bus break down on the way to the game? Because it ran out of “rush” hour!
  • Why did the Canadian football team have a potluck before the game? So they could have a tackle feast!
  • Why do Canadian football players always wear two pairs of pants? In case they get a rip in their Eh-C-U!
  • Why did the Canadian football team start a gardening club? Because they wanted to have the best Eh-grounds in the league!
  • Why did the Canadian football team play in the snowstorm? They wanted to have a “flurry” of touchdowns!
  • Why did the Canadian football team bring a ladder to the game? Because they heard the competition was going to be fierce and wanted to be prepared for any high tackles!
  • Why don’t Canadian football players trust stairs? Because they always prefer to go for a big leap!
  • What did the football team say to the snack bar? “Can I get a quarterback of fries, please?”
  • Why was the Canadian football player always warm during games? Because he always wore his toque on the field!
  • What do Canadian football players say when they score a touchdown? “Eh” to the end zone!
  • Why was the football player in Canada always cold? Because he was always playing in the North end zone!
  • Why did the Canadian Football team bring a measuring tape to the game? To make sure they were playing by the meter!
  • Why don’t Canadian football players use smartphones on the field? Because they prefer running back and forth, not scrolling back and forth!
  • Why did the Canadian football team play their game in the snow? Because they wanted to have a frosty reception!
  • Why did the Canadian football team open a bakery? Because they kneaded a good “roll-out” strategy!
  • Why did the Canadian football team always bring a pen to practice? In case they needed to draw up a play on ice!
  • Why did the Canadian football player bring a ladder to the game? He wanted to reach new heights and catch the highest passes!
  • What do you call a Canadian football player who can play the piano? A touch-down virtuoso!
  • How did the Canadian football team feel when they won the championship? Absolutely maple-y amazing!
  • Why did the Canadian football player wear two pairs of pants? In case he got a double overtime!
  • What did the Canadian football player say to the referee? “I think you’re off-side, eh!”
  • Why did the Canadian football coach go to the bakery? He wanted to get some good rolls for his team!
  • Why did the Canadian football team have trouble setting up their tent during a camping trip? They couldn’t find the proper field goalposts!
  • Why did the Canadian football team hire a pastry chef? Because they needed a good turnover specialist!
  • Why did the Canadian football team hire a mathematician? Because they wanted to “tackle” the game with some calculated strategies!
  • What do you call a Canadian football team that can’t stop scoring? A maple leaf offense!
  • What do Canadian Football players wear on Halloween? Helmet and treat!
  • Why do Canadian football teams bring refrigerators to the game? Because they like to keep their “cool” under pressure!
  • Why did the Canadian football team invite a magician to their game? So he could perform some field goal-tricks!
  • Why did the Canadian football team have a BBQ before every game? Because they knew how to grill their opponents on the field!
  • What do Canadian football players use to catch the ball? Their eh-nds!
  • Why do Canadian football players make great musicians? Because they know how to score a touchdown and play a mean tackle!
  • Why don’t Canadian football players wear baseball caps? Because they prefer to score “toque”-downs!
  • Why was the Canadian football team so good at gardening? Because they knew how to tackle those “eh” weeds!
  • Why don’t Canadian football players ever get hungry during games? Because they always have a good rush!
  • Why don’t Canadian football teams hire circus performers as kickers? They already have enough experience with the big top uprights!
  • How do Canadian football players stay cool during a game? They stand near the eh-c conditioner!
  • Why did the Canadian football team start a landscaping business? Because they wanted to make some great yards!
  • Why do Canadian football players love math? Because they can always count on a touchdown being worth 6 points!
  • Why did the Canadian football player always carry a map on the field? Because he didn’t want to get caught offside!
  • Why was the football team’s math test so easy? Because they only needed to know how to score a touchdown!
  • What do you call a Canadian football player who becomes a doctor? A quarterback surgeon!
  • Why did the Canadian football team always have a backup plan for their offense? Because they were always prepared for a bootleg play!
  • What do you call a Canadian football player who gets a penalty for excessive celebration? A polite flag thrower!
  • Why did the Canadian football team bring a map to the game? Because they didn’t want to get intercepted by the wrong team!
  • What did the Canadian football team say when they won the championship? “Eh, we’re just a-boot time!”
  • Why was the Canadian football team always so tired? Because they were constantly going for the Eh-xtra point!
  • Why did the Canadian football team always have a backup plan? Because they liked to punt from every angle!
  • What do Canadian football players do when they catch a cold? They take a quarterback-sine!
  • What do you call a Canadian football player who can’t stop making mistakes? A penalty maple!
  • Why did the Canadian football team bring a cat to the game? They heard it was purr-fect at catching interceptions!
  • What do you call a Canadian football player who becomes a chef? A “tackle” master in the kitchen!
  • Why do Canadian football teams bring extra pairs of pants to the game? In case they get a little too rough and end up tearing their shorts!
  • What did the football coach say to the Canadian geese on the field? “Fly for touchdowns!”
  • Why do Canadian football players make good farmers? Because they know how to use their hands to catch everything!
  • Why do Canadian football players make great fishermen? They know how to reel in those touchdown catches!
  • Why did the Canadian football team always bring a toolbox to the game? Because they were masters at “hammering” out a win!
  • Why do Canadian football players always carry an extra pair of pants? In case they get caught in a tackle and need to change their “eh” pads!
  • Why did the Canadian football team hire a pastry chef? Because they wanted to have the best turnovers in the game!
  • Why did the Canadian football team hire a seamstress? Because they needed someone to “stitch” up their defense!
  • Why don’t Canadian football players need to study for exams? Because they’re experts at tackling multiple-choice questions!
  • Why did the Canadian football team always bring a map to the game? In case they needed to rush for a touchdown!
  • What did the football player say when he accidentally tackled a maple tree during the game? “Sorry, I thought you were a defender!”
  • Why did the Canadian football player start a garden on the field? Because he wanted to grow touchdown flowers!
  • Why do Canadian football players make great chefs? Because they can tackle anything!
  • What do you call a Canadian football player who falls down a lot? A tumbleweed!
  • Why don’t Canadian football players drink tea? Because the British always go for extra points!
  • Why did the Canadian football team go to the bank? Because they wanted to make some quarterback deposits!
  • Why did the Canadian football team start practicing yoga? To improve their “eh” flexibility for those tricky moves on the field!
  • Why was the Canadian football field always so wet? Because the players always went for a pass!
  • Why did the Canadian football player bring a ladder to the game? He wanted to climb up and tackle any high-flying opponents!
  • Why did the Canadian football coach go to the bank? He wanted to get his quarterback a better interest rate on his passes!
  • What did the Canadian football coach say when his team kept fumbling the ball? “If you can’t catch a cold, at least catch the football!”
  • Why did the Canadian football team go to the bakery? They heard they could get a “roll” out of it!
  • What did the Canadian football coach say to the team after a big win? “Way to take a ‘boot’ out of the competition!”
  • Why did the Canadian football team play in the snow? Because they wanted to show off their ice touchdown dances!
  • Why did the Canadian football team eat their dinner on the field? Because they wanted to have a touchdown feast!
  • Why did the Canadian football team only play with Canadian coins? Because they didn’t want to be caught “passing” off any American ones!
  • What do Canadian football players use to bake cookies? A wide receiver!
  • Why don’t Canadian football players drink coffee before a game? Because it can cause too many “eh”-jections!
  • What do you call a Canadian football player who gets a sunburn during a game? A red zone defender!
  • Why did the Canadian football team bring a bucket of maple syrup to the game? Because they believed it would make their opponents “stick” to the field!
  • Why did the Canadian football team always bring a grill to the game? Because they loved serving up some “eh” hot dogs!
  • Why did the Canadian football team bring an extra pair of pants to the game? In case they got a touch-down!
  • Why did the Canadian football team always carry a broomstick? Because they were experts at sweeping the field!
  • Why was the Canadian football field always so wet? Because the players kept passing out maple syrup!
  • Why did the Canadian football team bring gardening tools to the game? They wanted to tackle their opponents and plant them in the ground!
  • Why was the Canadian football team so good at baking? Because they always had a lot of turnovers!
  • Why did the Canadian football team bring a loaf of bread to the game? Because they wanted to score some dough!
  • Why do Canadian football teams always bring an extra pair of socks to the game? In case they get a touch down!
  • Why did the Canadian football player bring a shovel to practice? He wanted to dig deep and find the secret to a winning season!
  • Why did the Canadian football player start a gardening club? Because he wanted to cultivate some field goals!
  • Why did the Canadian football team bring a dictionary to practice? So they could understand the quarterback’s “eh” audibles!
  • Why did the Canadian football team hire a chef? Because they wanted to have a good game plan for the tailgate party!
  • Why did the Canadian football team wear sunglasses on the field? Because they needed to block out the “eh” glare!
  • Why did the Canadian football team bring a compass to the game? Because they didn’t want to “pass” up any opportunities!
  • Why did the Canadian football team’s quarterback open a zoo? Because he wanted to show off his amazing passes!
  • Why was the Canadian football player always so warm during games? He was covered in rush defense!

 

Canadian Football Jokes for Kids

Canadian Football jokes for kids are the comedic equivalent of a touchdown—exciting, memorable, and always a crowd-pleaser.

These jokes help kids explore their creativity and understand the joy of wordplay, nurturing a love for humor that’s as lively as the game itself.

Moreover, Canadian Football jokes for kids have the added perk of making sport-related learning enjoyable, turning each pass, kick, and touchdown into a source of laughter.

Ready for some good-natured ribbing and pun-tastic fun?

Here are the jokes that’ll have your little ones laughing out loud on the gridiron:

  • What did the Canadian football coach say when he saw the team eating ice cream? “You’re on a ‘cone’ roll!”
  • Why did the football go to school in Canada? Because it wanted to get a touchdown in “eh”ducation!
  • Why did the football player go to the art gallery? Because he wanted to see some great pass-terpieces!
  • What did the football say to the soccer ball? “You can’t kick it like me, eh!”
  • Why did the football field go to the doctor? It had goal-post-traumatic stress disorder!
  • Why was the Canadian football field always so cold? Because all the players kept giving the Chillie Awards!
  • What do you call a Canadian football player who dances on the field? A kick-linebacker!
  • What do you get when you cross a Canadian football player with a baker? A quarterback who always delivers “scones” for touchdowns!
  • How did the Canadian football player become a millionaire? He started off as a billionaire and then bought a team!
  • What do Canadian football players like to eat during halftime? Poutine and touchdown-dogs!
  • What do Canadian football players wear on Halloween? Helmet-o-ween costumes!
  • What’s a Canadian football player’s favorite subject in school? Math, because they love tackling numbers!
  • What do you call a football game between a moose and a beaver? The ultimate Canadian showdown!
  • What’s a football player’s favorite kind of cake? Quarterback cheesecake!
  • What did the football player say when he saw a moose running onto the field? “Oh deer, we have some unexpected competition!”
  • Why did the football player bring a shovel to the game? Because he heard there would be a lot of tackles!
  • Why did the Canadian football team bring a clock to the game? So they could keep track of the time of possession!
  • How does a Canadian football player stay warm during the game? They always bring a “toque” (winter hat) to wear!
  • Why did the Canadian football team bring a ladder to the game? Because they wanted to reach new “heights” in the league!
  • Why did the football team always play in the snow? Because they wanted to have a “chill” touchdown celebration!
  • Why do football players make good storytellers? Because they always have a lot of “tale” to share!
  • What do you call a Canadian football player with no hands or feet? The team’s biggest fan!
  • What do you get when you cross a Canadian football player and a hot dog? A touchdown dog!
  • Why do Canadian football teams always carry an extra pair of pants? In case they have to kick a field goal!
  • What do you call a Canadian football player with no hands? All thumbs up for catching the ball!
  • Why did the football team go to the bank? They heard they could make some great “passes” there!
  • What do you get if you cross a Canadian football player and a snowman? Frostbite!
  • Why did the football player go to school? To get a little extra “tackle” edge-ucation!
  • Why don’t Canadian football players play hide and seek? Because they can never find the “quarterback”!
  • Why did the Canadian football team bring a ladder to the game? Because they heard they could score “extra points” if they climbed it and touched the top bar!
  • What did the football say to the Canadian football? “I’m ‘tackling’ the game, eh!”
  • What do you call a football player who fakes injuries? A Canadian faker!
  • What do you call a football player who plays for a Canadian team and loves to eat pancakes? A “touchdowny” bear!
  • Why was the Canadian football field always wet? Because of all the touchdown splashes!
  • Why did the football team go to the bakery in Canada? Because they wanted to get some “loaf” to score a “roll”ing touchdown!
  • Why did the Canadian football player bring a shovel to the game? So he could dig his way to the Super Bowl!
  • What do you call it when a Canadian football player trips and falls? A “sorry-down”!
  • What did the football say to the Canadian player? “I’m a little deflated, eh?”
  • Why don’t football players ever go on vacation? Because they’re always in a rush!
  • Why did the football team bring a canoe to the game? In case they needed to paddle their way to a touchdown!
  • What do you call a football player who can do magic tricks? A quarterback-er!
  • What did the football coach say to the punter? “Give it your boot, eh?”
  • How do Canadian football players keep warm during winter games? They huddle up in a “eh” formation!
  • Why did the Canadian football team bring their own snacks to the game? Because they heard it was a “touchdown” feast!
  • What’s a Canadian football player’s favorite type of food? Quarter-pounders!
  • Why did the football team invite a moose to their game in Canada? Because they heard it had great ant-lateral moves!
  • Why did the football field go to the doctor? It had a bad case of goal-line fever!
  • What did one Canadian football say to the other football? Let’s kick it up a notch!
  • Why did the Canadian football team bring a compass to the game? So they could “go north” and score points!
  • Why did the football player bring a pig to the game? Because he heard they needed a little extra bacon on the field!
  • What do Canadian football players wear to bed? Helmet and cleat pajamas!
  • Why do Canadian football teams always win at hide-and-seek? Because they can always find the end zone!
  • Why was the Canadian football player a great comedian? Because he always knew how to tackle the audience with laughter!
  • What do you call a football player from Canada who can balance books on his head? A quarterback-ian!
  • What did the football say to the football player? “I get a kick out of you!”
  • What did the football coach say to the struggling player? “Don’t worry, you can still be a maple-ous player!”
  • Why was the football coach always in the shade? Because he had a great game plan!
  • Why do Canadian football players love math? Because they always want to go for the extra point!
  • Why do Canadian football players always bring a canoe to the game? In case they need to “punt” the ball across the field!
  • What do Canadian football players use to make their field extra bouncy? Moose heads instead of goal posts!
  • What do you get when you cross a football player and a snowstorm in Canada? A chilly reception!
  • Why was the Canadian football team so tired after the game? They had been running back and forth all day!
  • Why did the football player go to school? Because he wanted to be well-rounded!
  • What do Canadian football players do when they’re cold during a game? They huddle up and shout, “Eh, team!”
  • Why did the Canadian football player bring a map to the game? Because he wanted to “intercept” any wrong turns!
  • Why did the football coach take his team to the frozen lake in Canada? Because he wanted them to practice their “ice” formation!
  • Why was the football field always so hot? Because all of the fans were cheering!
  • What is a Canadian football player’s favorite type of music? Quarterback-and-roll!
  • Why did the Canadian football team go to the library? To check out some new plays!
  • What do you call a football player who loves maple syrup? A “sweet” quarterback!
  • What did the football coach say to the broken vending machine? “Give me my quarterback!” .
  • Why don’t Canadian football players like using the elevator? They prefer to tackle the stairs!
  • What do you call a Canadian football player who can jump really high? A touchdown jumper!
  • Why don’t Canadian football players like to wear high socks? Because they prefer to keep a low boot!
  • What did the football player say to the football when it asked for a date? Sorry, I’m already in a tight end!
  • What do you call a Canadian football player who makes good grades? A smart pass!
  • Why did the football player go to school? To improve his tackle-tics!
  • What do you call a Canadian football player who scores a touchdown? A maple leaf-er!
  • Why don’t Canadian football players like to eat on the field? Because they don’t want to be called “tackle box”!
  • Why did the football player bring a suitcase to the game? Because he wanted to pack his quarterback!
  • Why was the football stadium always so cool? It had lots of fans!
  • What do Canadian football players say when they win the championship? “We’re on a Maple Leaf streak!”
  • What do you call a Canadian football player who dances in the end zone? A touchdown twirler!
  • Why did the Canadian football player bring a ladder to the game? In case he wanted to go for a “high eh-ron”!
  • What do you call a bear playing Canadian football? A goal-linebacker!
  • What do Canadian football players use to write down their plays? A maple leaf notebook!
  • Why did the football coach go to the bakery? To get his quarterback a few rolls!
  • What do you call a football player who works at a bakery? A pie receiver!
  • What did the football say to the goalie? I’m going for a touchdown!
  • Why don’t Canadian football players wear headphones during the game? Because they prefer to “tackle” the silence!
  • Why was the Canadian football player a great dancer? Because he had all the right moves on and off the field!
  • What do football players say before they eat? Hut, hut, munch!
  • Why did the Canadian football player bring a plunger to the game? Because he wanted to “plunge” through the defense!
  • What do football players wear on Halloween? Helmet-ees and tack-le skirts!
  • Why did the football stadium get hot after the game? All of the fans left!
  • Why do Canadian football players like cold weather games? Because they can really chill out on the field!
  • What do you call a Canadian football player who is also a magician? A “touchdown” illusionist!
  • Why did the Canadian football player bring a hockey stick to the game? In case he needed to take a slapshot for a field goal!
  • What do you call a football player from Canada? A good sport!
  • What do Canadian football players eat during halftime? Maple syrup-covered touchdown waffles!
  • Why did the football team hire a painter? Because they needed someone to tackle the end zone painting!
  • Why did the football coach go to the bakery before the game? He needed a good roll model!
  • Why did the football team go to the farm? To get a good field advantage!
  • Why did the football team always carry a ladder? In case they needed to pass!
  • Why did the football team wear hats during the game? To cover their “touch-down” hair!
  • Why did the football player bring a car to the game? Because he heard they were going for a drive play!
  • Why do Canadian football players always bring their lunch to the game? Because they love tackling!
  • What did the Canadian football player say to the lightning bolt? “You can’t catch me, I’m too grounded!”
  • What do you call a football player from Canada who loves pancakes? A maple leaf blocker!
  • What did the football coach say to the clumsy player? “I know you’re Canadian, but you need to stop saying ‘sorry’ every time you fumble!”

 

Canadian Football Jokes for Adults

Who says adults can’t enjoy a good Canadian football joke?

Canadian Football Jokes for Adults kick the humor up a notch, merging clever wit with a dash of rascality.

Just like the exciting game of Canadian football, these jokes blend components of humor, intellect, and a sprinkle of audacity for a memorable chuckle.

These jokes are ideal for sports gatherings, bar hangouts, or simply to lighten the mood during a spirited debate among friends.

Here are some Canadian football jokes that are ready for adults to tackle:

  • What did the Canadian football coach say to his losing team? “Don’t worry, we’ll just poutine more effort next time!”
  • Why did the Canadian football team always bring a ladder to their games? So they could climb to new heights and be above the competition!
  • Why do Canadian football players always bring a map onto the field? Because they can’t seem to figure out where the end zone is!
  • Why did the Canadian football team have a hard time playing on the beach? They couldn’t find any ice to skate on!
  • What do Canadian football players do when they win the championship? They take a maple syrup shower!
  • Why did the Canadian football player bring a ladder to the game? To make sure he was always on the “upside” of the play!
  • Why don’t Canadian football players like using the internet? Because they prefer running their own routes instead of downloading routes from Google!
  • Why did the Canadian football player bring a pencil to the game? In case he needed to draw some pass interference!
  • Why did the Canadian football team always bring a compass to the game? So they wouldn’t get lost on their way to the end zone!
  • Why did the Canadian football player bring a notebook to the game? To tackle his opponents with great ideas!
  • What do you call it when a Canadian Football player gets arrested? Illegal “receiving” yards!
  • What do you call a Canadian football player with no girlfriend? Homeless!
  • Why do Canadian football teams always carry extra pens? In case they need to draw up a new play on the fly!
  • Why did the Canadian football team bring a GPS to practice? They wanted to find their way to the Grey Cup!
  • Why did the Canadian football team have a pet parrot on the sidelines? So they could always have a bird’s-eye view of the game!
  • Why did the Canadian football player bring a flashlight to the game? So he could find the open receiver in the “dark” zone!
  • Why don’t Canadian football players make good detectives? Because they can never seem to find the end zone!
  • What did the Canadian football player say to the opponent after a great tackle? “Sorry, eh?”
  • Why did the Canadian football player bring a chef to the game? Because he wanted to cook up some touchdowns!
  • Why don’t Canadian football players use cell phones? They can’t find a receiver!
  • Why don’t Canadian football teams ever make good gardeners? Because they always struggle with the end zone!
  • Why did the Canadian football player bring a dictionary to the game? Because he wanted to understand every play on words!
  • Why did the Canadian Football team start a gardening club? Because they wanted to tackle the competition and “grow” stronger!
  • What’s the difference between Canadian football and American football? In Canadian football, you can apologize for tackling too hard!
  • Why did the Canadian football player go to culinary school? He wanted to learn how to tackle “buttery” offense!
  • Why did the Canadian football player bring a pillow to the game? So he could sack the quarterback and tuck him in for a nap!
  • Why don’t Canadian football players drink tea? Because the quarterback prefers to throw passes, not parties!
  • Why do Canadian football players wear diapers? Because every time they get close to the end zone, they get scared and poop themselves!
  • Why did the Canadian football player become an artist? Because he could always make a good impression!
  • Why do Canadian football fans always bring a ladder to the game? So they can get a better view of the moose that occasionally wanders onto the field!
  • Why did the Canadian football team go to the bakery before the game? They wanted to make sure they had enough turnovers!
  • Why did the Canadian football team’s mascot always carry maple syrup? So they could sweeten their victories!
  • Why did the Canadian football team hire a chicken as their coach? Because it had the best scramble offense!
  • Why don’t Canadian football players make good comedians? Because they can’t pass the punchline!
  • Why did the Canadian football team bring a camera crew to the game? So they could capture all the action in “eh”-mazing slow motion!
  • What do you call a Canadian Football team that never wins a game? The “Out of Tim-bers”!
  • Why was the Canadian football team so good at baking? They always knew how to knead the dough!
  • Why are Canadian football stadiums always so quiet? Because the fans are too busy saying sorry for cheering too loudly!
  • What do you call a Canadian football player who loses all his games? A sore loser, eh?
  • What did the Canadian football player say when he lost his shoes? “I need to tie the laces of my sole!”
  • Why did the Canadian football team hire a librarian? They wanted someone who knew how to tackle!
  • Why did the Canadian football team always have a calendar on the sidelines? So they could keep track of their “quarter”backs!
  • Why did the Canadian football player become a baker? Because he wanted to make some turnovers on and off the field!
  • Why did the Canadian football player bring a map to the game? So he could navigate his way through the offensive line!
  • What did the Canadian football player say when he scored a touchdown? “Sorry for crossing the line, eh!”
  • Why did the Canadian football team have a hard time scoring touchdowns? They kept getting distracted by the maple leaves falling on the field!
  • What do you call a Canadian football player who fumbles the ball? Butterfingers!
  • Why did the Canadian football team bring a comedian to the game? To keep the crowd laughing when they fumbled, eh!
  • Why do Canadian football players always wear two pairs of socks? To have extra padding for those cold games!
  • Why did the Canadian football team invite the math teacher to their game? They needed help with their long division!
  • Why did the Canadian football team always bring a canoe to the game? Just in case they needed to make a quick water break!
  • Why did the Canadian football team bring a hairdryer to the game? So they could blow away the competition!
  • Why do Canadian football players wear diapers on the field? In case they have a fumble-accident!
  • Why did the Canadian football player become a chef? Because he heard he could score a lot of turnovers!
  • Why did the Canadian football player bring a calculator to the game? He wanted to tally up his rushing yards!
  • What do you call it when a Canadian football team gets their uniforms dirty? Roughing the laundry!
  • Why did the Canadian football team have a bake sale? They needed dough for new uniforms!
  • Why did the Canadian football player become a gardener? He heard it’s the only field where he won’t be tackled!
  • Why don’t Canadian football players like playing on the beach? They don’t want to get sand trapped!
  • What do you call a Canadian football player who is always late? Delay of “eh”-game!
  • Why do Canadian football players always carry a map? Because they never want to get caught offside!
  • Why did the Canadian football player bring a map to the game? He heard the end zone was located somewhere near the North Pole!
  • Why did the Canadian football team go to therapy? They needed help dealing with their attachment issues to the goalposts!
  • Why was the Canadian Football coach always so calm? Because he knew his team would always “eh-ce” the game!
  • What’s the difference between a Canadian football player and a dollar bill? You can actually get four quarters out of a dollar bill!
  • Why did the Canadian football player bring a fishing rod to the game? He heard they were going for a Hail Mary catch!
  • Why was the Canadian football field so slippery? Because it was covered in maple syrup after the team celebrated their victory!
  • Why did the Canadian football team always have a backup quarterback? Because they never know when they’ll need a ‘sore-y’ substitute!
  • What did the Canadian football coach say to his team after they won the championship? “You guys are always kicking it Eh-S-A!”
  • Why did the Canadian football team wear helmets with maple leaf stickers? To show they’re the most polite players on the field!
  • What do you call it when a Canadian football player moonlights as a chef? A quarterback cook!
  • Why don’t Canadian football players wear earplugs? Because they prefer to hear the ‘eh’ in touchdown!
  • Why did the Canadian football team hire a chef? They needed someone who could cook up some touchdowns!
  • What do you call a Canadian football player who gets too close to a skunk? A scent-ennial player!
  • What do Canadian football players do during halftime? They take a break to sip some maple syrup and munch on poutine!
  • Why did the Canadian football player become a comedian? He knew he’d always have a captive audience during halftime!
  • Why do Canadian football teams never have successful passing plays? The quarterbacks keep saying “sorry” every time they throw the ball!
  • What did the Canadian football player say when he found out he was going to be a dad? “I’m about to score a touchdown in my personal life too!”
  • Why did the Canadian football team always have a backup quarterback? In case the first one wanted to take a “toque” break!
  • Why do Canadian football teams always carry a map to the game? So they can find their way to the end zone!
  • Why was the Canadian football team like a bakery? They both need a good turnover!
  • What did the Canadian football player say when he caught a pass in the snowstorm? “I guess it’s true what they say, Eh? Great catches are made in Canada!”
  • Why do Canadian football players always bring a pencil to the game? In case they have to draw a “quarterback”!
  • What do you call a Canadian football player who gets a concussion? A sorry situation!
  • Why was the Canadian football field always so cold? Because it was filled with ice packs instead of grass!
  • What did the Canadian football coach say when he found out his team had a leak? “Patch up that defense!”
  • What did the Canadian football coach say to the punter who kept missing the ball? “You’re really dropping the eh-ball!”
  • Why did the Canadian football coach take his team to the bakery before the big game? He wanted them to have a “doughnut” strategy!
  • What do you get when you cross a Canadian football player and a mathlete? Someone who can tackle complex equations!
  • Why did the Canadian football player bring a ladder to the game? In case they needed to go for a higher scoring play!
  • What do Canadian football players say when they get a penalty? “Sorry, ref, it was just a “eh” minor infraction!”
  • Why did the Canadian football team start a band? They wanted to see if they could make a good tackle riff!
  • How do Canadian football players like their coffee? With a little Canadian maple syrup for extra kick!
  • Why do Canadian football fans always bring a ladder to the game? Because they want to see their team reach new heights!
  • Why do Canadian football players make terrible doctors? Because they always drop the ball when it comes to passing!
  • What do you call a Canadian football team that can’t stop eating? The Buffalo Chips!
  • What do you call a Canadian football player who only does well in math class? A quarterback with excellent calculations!
  • Why did the Canadian football player bring a pencil to the game? Because he wanted to draw up some new plays on the field!
  • Why do Canadian football players make terrible chefs? Because they’re always throwing the pigskin instead of the pigskin!
  • Why did the Canadian Football team have a hard time playing in the rain? Because the quarterback kept throwing “moose” balls!
  • Why did the Canadian football team hire a DJ? They wanted to have some great reception on the field!
  • Why don’t Canadian football players drink tea? Because the Leafs always get knocked out early!
  • Why don’t Canadian football players go on vacation? They’re always stuck in the end zone!
  • What do Canadian football players use to keep themselves cool during a game? “Eh” conditioning units!
  • Why did the Canadian football team’s defense always have great discipline? Because they were used to saying sorry after every tackle!
  • Why did the Canadian football player bring a shovel to the game? In case he needed to dig himself out of a tight end!
  • Why did the Canadian football player bring a loaf of bread to the game? In case he got hungry for some goalpost!
  • Why was the Canadian football team so good at multitasking? They could tackle and apologize at the same time!
  • Why was the Canadian football player always calm during games? Because he knew he had plenty of “eh” time!
  • Why did the Canadian football team always have a successful running game? Because they could always find a hole in the defense, eh!
  • What do you call a Canadian football player who’s always getting injured? A sore-y back!
  • Why don’t Canadian Football teams hire vampires? Because they can’t find a good placekicker with a garlic allergy!
  • Why did the Canadian football team’s coach always keep a hockey stick on the sidelines? In case they needed a last-minute field goal attempt!
  • Why did the Canadian football team wear sunglasses during the game? Because they didn’t want to get blinded by the CFL’s bright lights!
  • Why did the Canadian football player bring a fishing rod to the game? In case he needed to reel in a touchdown catch!
  • What did the Canadian football say to the football fan? “I’m sorry, but I can’t poutine up with your team!”
  • Why did the Canadian football player refuse to play in the rain? He didn’t want to end up “eh”-qually wet!
  • Why did the Canadian football team start a band? Because they wanted to score some major beats on the field!
  • Why did the Canadian football team bring a ladder onto the field? They wanted to climb the “eh”-ffensive line!
  • Why did the Canadian football team bring extra blankets to the game? They heard it was going to be a chilly reception!
  • Why did the Canadian football team open a bakery? They wanted to have a lot of turnovers in their game plan!
  • What do you call a Canadian football player who can’t catch a pass? A receiver with butterfingers!
  • Why did the Canadian football team switch to a plant-based diet? They wanted to have more “leaf” blockers!
  • What do you call a Canadian football player who doesn’t pay his taxes? A quarterback sneak!
  • Why did the Canadian football team always bring a telescope to the game? So they could see the touchdown from a distance!
  • Why did the Canadian football coach bring a fan to every game? So his players wouldn’t get too chilly on the sidelines!
  • What did the Canadian football player say when he won the championship? “Sorry, not sorry, eh!”
  • Why was the Canadian Football field always so muddy? Because the players kept passing the puck instead of the ball!
  • Why do Canadian football players love to visit farms? Because they always enjoy a good field goal!
  • Why did the Canadian football team hire a photographer? Because they wanted to catch all the “passes”!
  • What do you call it when a Canadian football team wins the championship? A rare occurrence!

 

Canadian Football Joke Generator

Scoring a touchdown with a good Canadian football joke can sometimes feel like being on the defense line during the Grey Cup.

(Can you tackle that?)

That’s where our FREE Canadian Football Joke Generator steps in to intercept your worries.

Designed to blend witty puns, sports lingo, and a dash of Canadian charm, it creates jokes that are guaranteed to break the ice, even in the dead of winter.

Don’t let your humor fumble.

Use our joke generator to create jokes that are as vibrant and dynamic as a CFL game.

 

FAQs About Canadian Football Jokes

Why are Canadian Football jokes so popular?

Canadian Football jokes are popular because they tap into the nation’s passion for the sport.

They offer a fun, light-hearted way to engage with the game, its players, and the ups and downs of each season.

 

Can Canadian Football jokes help in social situations?

Certainly!

Jokes about Canadian Football can help to break the ice, lighten the atmosphere, or simply showcase your knowledge about the sport.

Whether you’re at a game, a sports bar, or a social gathering, a well-timed football joke can help to build a sense of camaraderie.

 

How can I come up with my own Canadian Football jokes?

  1. Get to know the game in detail—the rules, the players, the teams, the typical game situations etc.
  2. Identify the unique aspects of Canadian Football, such as its field size, number of players, or scoring system. These are great fodder for humor.
  3. Consider common phrases, expressions, or cliches related to football, and find a fun way to twist them into a joke.
  4. Think about the personalities of the players, coaches, and teams. There’s often humor to be found in their quirks and idiosyncrasies.
  5. Don’t forget about puns and wordplay. With terms like touchdown, fumble, and field goal, there are plenty of opportunities for linguistic fun.

 

Are there any tips for remembering Canadian Football jokes?

Try associating football jokes with specific moments in the game, such as a touchdown, a fumble, or a controversial referee decision.

By linking the jokes to memorable events, you’ll find them easier to recall.

 

How can I make my Canadian Football jokes better?

The key is in the timing and context.

Know your audience and their knowledge of football, use surprise to your advantage, and play with words.

Practice makes perfect, so keep sharing your jokes and refining them based on the reactions you receive.

 

How does the Canadian Football Joke Generator work?

Our Canadian Football Joke Generator is your go-to tool for instant humor.

Simply enter keywords related to your humor or situation, and hit the Generate Jokes button.

Within moments, you’ll have a selection of funny, game-related jokes to entertain your audience.

 

Is the Canadian Football Joke Generator free?

Absolutely, our Canadian Football Joke Generator is completely free to use!

Generate as many jokes as you want and keep your conversations lively and entertaining.

Enjoy the lighter side of Canadian Football with our joke generator.

 

Conclusion

Canadian Football jokes are an entertaining way to add a little extra fun to everyday conversations, making life more enjoyable with each hearty chuckle.

From the swift and clever to the lengthy and laugh-provoking, there’s a Canadian Football joke for every situation.

So next time you’re watching a Canadian Football game, remember, there’s humor to be found in every pass, punt, and play.

Keep passing the giggles, and let the good times touchdown and roll.

Because after all, a day without laughter is like a day without Canadian Football—unthinkable and, frankly, a bit less thrilling.

Happy joking, everyone!

CFL Jokes That Are a Total Field Goal of Humour

Grey Cup Jokes for Every Canadian Football Fan

Maple Leaf Jokes That Will Make Any Canadian Chuckle

Touchdown Jokes That Will Tackle Your Funny Bone

Quarterback Jokes to Score a Laugh in Your Next Gathering

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