731 First Date Jokes That Spark Romance and Laughter

If you’re here, it means you’re ready to dive into the world of first date jokes.

Not just any jokes, but the cream of the comedic crop.

That’s why we’ve compiled a list of the most hilarious first date jokes.

From cheeky ice-breakers to sly one-liners, our compilation has a joke for every awkward silence.

So, let’s navigate the exciting maze of first date humor, one joke at a time.

Contents show

First Date Jokes

First date jokes have a special quality that can lighten the mood and break the ice on what could potentially be a nerve-wracking event.

They’re not just about the awkward moments or the constant worry about what to say next, but they also revolve around the shared culture of dating.

From the excitement and anxiety that precedes the date to the potential hilarities and mishaps during it, first dates provide an endless well of comedic situations.

Creating the ideal first date joke involves a blend of relatable experiences, clever wordplay, and a touch of self-deprecation.

It takes into account the universally recognized trials and tribulations of dating – the anxiety of who pays, the fear of awkward silences, or the uncertainty of securing that second date.

Ready to laugh and ease the tension?

Dive into the amusing world of first date jokes with these rib-ticklers:

Why did the first date bring a potted plant? They wanted to show they were looking for something long-term!
Why did the scarecrow go on a first date? He was hoping to find someone to cuddle up with in the field.
What did the ocean say to the beach on their first date? “I’m really shore we’ll have a wave of a time!”
Why did the clock go on a first date with the calendar? Because they heard it was about time they met!
Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!
Why did the fish go on a first date with a worm? Because they heard it was off the hook!
Why did the first date bring a box of tissues? They wanted to be prepared in case the conversation made them laugh so hard they cried!
Why did the pencil and the paper go on their first date? Because they knew they would make a good pair!
Why did the skeleton go on a first date? Because they heard they had a bone to pick with them!
Why did the first date bring a ladder to the restaurant? They wanted to make sure they fell head over heels!
Why was the math textbook nervous before its first date? It had too many exes.
Why did the math book go on a first date with the history book? Because it wanted to multiply its knowledge!
Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants on his first date? In case he got a hole in one!
Why did the clock go on a first date? Because it knew it would have a good time-telling jokes!
What did the boy cat say to the girl cat on their first date? “You’re purrfectly meow-velous!”
What did the banana say to the grape on their first date? “Stop wine-ing and let’s have a-peeling conversation!”
Why did the skeleton take his first date to the movies? Because he had no body to go with!
What did the volcano say to their date? “I lava good time with you!”
Why did the first date go to the orthodontist? To get their teeth aligned for a perfect smile!
What did the first date say to the waiter? “I hope this dinner is a-maize-ing, just like my date!”
Why did the first date bring a compass? To ensure they didn’t lose their direction in love!
Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself? It was two-tired!
Why did the first date bring a stopwatch? They wanted to make sure they had a good time in a timely manner!
Why did the grape go on a first date with the raisin? Because it couldn’t find a better date-mate!
What do you call a first date with a cat? A purrfect match!
Why did the first date go to the gym? They wanted to work out their chemistry!
What did the painter say to their first date? “I can’t brush off the feeling that we were meant to paint the town red together!”
Why did the football player go on a first date? Because he wanted to score some points with his crush!
What did the first date say to the coffee? “You’re brew-tiful, just like this date!”
Why did the banana go on a first date? Because it couldn’t find a “peel-mate” anywhere else!
Why did the football team bring string to their first date? Because they wanted to tie the knot!
Why did the first date bring a measuring tape? To ensure they had the perfect “match”!
Why did the skeleton feel nervous on its first date? It didn’t have the guts to ask any “body” out before!
Why did the computer bring flowers on its first date? Because it had a crush on the printer!
What did the first date say to the salad? “Lettuce be together forever!”
Why did the pencil go on a first date with the eraser? They wanted to make sure it was a “write” match!
What did the blanket say to the bed on their first date? “I got you covered!”
Why did the skeleton cancel his first date? He didn’t have the guts for it!
What did the buffalo say to his first date? “I think you’re bison-ly beautiful!”
Why did the orange go on a date with the lemon? They both wanted some zest in their lives!
What did the spoon say to the fork on their first date? “I feel so stirred up whenever I’m with you!”
Why did the math book go on a first date with a history book? They wanted to have an equation-filled evening!
What did the waiter say to the couple on their first date at a seafood restaurant? “Don’t be shellfish, share the calamari!”
What did the hamburger say to the pickle on their first date? “You’re kind of a big dill!”
What did the waiter say to the first date? “Table for two? Looks like you’re ready for a romantic date!”
Why did the first date bring a watch that didn’t work? So they could say, “Sorry, I lost track of time during this amazing date!”
Why did the first date bring a map to the restaurant? In case they got “lost in love” and needed directions!
What did the first date say when they found out the restaurant was closed? “Looks like we’re going on an adventure for our first date!”
Why did the calendar refuse to go on a first date? It heard it was always getting stood up!
Why did the first date bring a ladder? They wanted to make a good first impression and “reach” for the stars!
Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts!
What did the sushi say to the soy sauce on their first date? “I soy you rollin’ and I’m lovin’ it!”
Why did the baker take his date to the bakery? Because he kneaded some love in his life!
Why did the first date bring a pocket dictionary? They wanted to make sure they were always on the same page!
Why did the bicycle fall over on its first date? It was two-tired!
Why did the clock take its date to the dance? It knew how to make some good moves.
What did the first date say when asked if they wanted dessert? “I already have something sweet sitting across from me!”
Why did the first date bring a clock? Because it was time to make a connection!
What did the painter say to his first date? “I really canvas for your love!”
Why did the first date bring a pillow? In case there were any “sparks” that needed to be extinguished!
Why did the skeleton bring a map on its first date? Because it had no body to go with!
What do you call fake spaghetti? An impasta!
What did one volcano say to the other on their first date? “I lava you so much, it’s erupting!”
Why was the math book sad after its first date? It couldn’t find a single equation that added up to love.
Why did the first date bring a ladder? Because they heard love is in the air!
Why did the scarecrow blush on its first date? Because it had so much hay in its pants!
Why did the computer take its first date to a baseball game? Because it wanted to show her its “hard drive” skills!
Why did the computer take the plant on a first date? Because it heard it needed a bit more RAM-ance!
Why did the broom go on a first date? Because it was “sweeping” someone off their feet!
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman!
Why don’t scientists trust atoms on their first dates? Because they make up everything!
Why did the clock go on a first date with the calendar? Because they were meant for each other, day and night!
Why did the computer go on a first date? Because it had a byte of love at first sight!
Why did the first date go to the concert? Because they heard it was a smashing time!
Why did the coffee bean go on a first date? Because it heard they were a great blend!
Why did the first date bring a bag of chips? Because they wanted to add some “snack-tion” to the evening!
What did one wall say to the other wall on their first date? “I’ll meet you at the corner!”
Why did the bee go on a first date? It heard the flower was “bee-utiful” and wanted to get to pollen-t know it!
Why did the pencil bring a friend on its first date? It didn’t want to be single-pointed!
What did the shy vegetable say on its first date? “Lettuce turnip the beet and make this night romaine-tic!”
Why did the music conductor go on a first date? Because they were looking for a symphony of love!
What did one math book say to the other math book on their first date? “I’ve got so many problems!”
Why was the math book sad after its first date? Because it had too many problems!
Why did the math teacher bring a ladder on her first date? Because she wanted to show her love interest the “X-factor”!
Why did the first date bring a map? Because they wanted to find love at first sight!
Why did the first date bring a ladder? To help them reach for the stars!
What did the first date say when they saw a bee? “I guess we’re in for some buzz on our first date!”
Why did the first date bring a flashlight? In case love gets a little dim!
Why did the scarecrow go on a first date? He was hoping for a corny pick-up line!
What did the math book say to the history book on their first date? “I hope we can make some great equations together!”
What did the first date say when they accidentally spilled their drink? “I guess this is our first spill together!”
What did the traffic light say to the car on their first date? “Don’t look, I’m changing!”
Why did the math textbook go on a first date? It was hoping to find a solution for love!
What did one eye say to the other on their first date? “Between you and me, something smells funny!”
Why did the first date bring a camera? They wanted to capture the moments they fell in love!

Short First Date Jokes

Short first date jokes are like that first flirtatious glance across the table—quick, clever, and absolutely unforgettable.

These jokes are perfect for breaking the ice in awkward date situations, or for sharing as witty status updates or Tinder bios.

The genius of short first date jokes resides in their power to incite laughter and lighten the mood in just a matter of seconds.

So, ready to make your date go gaga with laughter?

Here are some short first date jokes that are sure to charm your way into their heart, one laugh at a time.

What do you call a first date between two pencils? A “pencil-vania”!
What’s a penguin’s favorite first date activity? Ice-breaking!
What’s a skeleton’s idea of a first date? Ribs and a movie!
Why don’t scientists trust first dates? Because they carbon-date!
Why did the first date bring a calculator? To count the sparks!
What do you call a first date that goes well? Beginner’s luck!
Why don’t scientists trust first dates? They’re carbon-dated!
What’s a vampire’s ideal first date? Coffin, candlelight, and necks!
Why don’t eggs tell jokes? Because they might crack up!
What did the pencil say to its first date? “You’re just write!”
What’s a vampire’s favorite part of a first date? The necks-t step!
What did the sushi say on its first date? Wasabi with you!
What did the first date say to the burger? You’re well done!
What do you call a first date that’s underwater? A little dive-in!
Why don’t melons ever get married? Because they cantaloupe!
What do you call a first date at the zoo? A panda-emonium!
Why couldn’t the bicycle find its way home? It lost its bearings!
What’s brown and sticky? A stick!
What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear!
Why did the two melons go on a date? Because they cantaloupe!
What did the boy pick up on his first date? The check!
What did one first date say to the other? You’re a-date-able!
Why did the first date bring a compass? To navigate the chemistry!
What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh!
Why was the broom late for its first date? It overswept!
What did the shy ghost say on its first date?
What do you call a fish’s first date? Fishtory!
Why don’t oysters donate to charity? Because they are shellfish!
Why did the scarecrow take his first date to a cornfield?

First Date Jokes One-Liners

First date one-liner jokes are the embodiment of humor distilled into a single phrase.

They are the verbal version of the perfect first impression – unexpected, charming, and undeniably engaging.

Creating a great first date one-liner needs a balance of wit, timing, and a profound understanding of the human connection.

The task is to wrap the ice breaker and punchline into a concise expression, providing maximum amusement with minimal words.

May these first date one-liners turn your nervous chuckle into hearty laughter:

I was so nervous on my first date that I spilled my drink all over myself. My date said I looked “refreshing.”
I went on my first date last night and my date brought his mom along. I guess he really wanted to make a good impression.
On my first date, I told my date I was terrible at geography. She said, “That’s okay, I don’t mind long distances.” I never saw her again.
On my first date, I accidentally spilled my drink all over my date’s lap. They say love is messy, but this was ridiculous.
My first date brought me flowers, but they were actually for the waiter.
I accidentally walked into the wrong restaurant for my date, but it turned out to be a happy mistake because they had better food than the one I had planned.
My friend told me to play hard to get on a first date, so I showed up 30 minutes late with a Sudoku book and pretended not to notice them.
My first date was going well until I accidentally called her by my ex’s name. Her name was Alexa; my ex’s name was Siri.
My first date? It’s more like a blindfolded speed-dating round in a minefield.
On my first date, my date asked me if I believed in ghosts. I replied, “Only when it comes to ghosting after a bad date.”
On my first date, I wanted to make a good impression, so I wore my lucky underwear. Turns out, it wasn’t that lucky after all.
My first date told me they were a big fan of adventure, so I took them to the supermarket and let them push the squeaky cart.
My date asked me if I believe in ghosts, I said, “Only if Casper is paying for dinner.”
My first date was so uncomfortable, I was tempted to hide in the bathroom and wait for the “It’s an emergency, I need to leave” text from a friend.
I showed up 20 minutes early for my first date, only to find out they were still 20 minutes late.
My first date ever was like a roller coaster ride. It started with anticipation, then went downhill from there.
I knew my first date was going to be awkward when we both showed up wearing the same outfit.
On my first date, I accidentally called my date by the wrong name. I guess I didn’t make a great first impression.
My first date idea is to go to a magic show and hope they disappear so I don’t have to make small talk.
I took my date to a fancy restaurant and accidentally mispronounced “quinoa.” Let’s just say it was not a good first impression.
My first date told me she’s a vegetarian, so I asked if that means she doesn’t want any sausage on her pizza. She left.
My first date said they were a great chef, but all they made was a reservation.
My first date was going well until I discovered we had absolutely nothing in common, not even the same definition of a “date”
My first date said she didn’t want any drama, so I brought my own theater masks.
My date asked me if I had any siblings. I said, “Yes, but they’re all imaginary.” She never called me back.
During my first date, I spilled a whole glass of water on myself. It was a real icebreaker, or should I say, pants-soaker.
I went on a blind date once. Turns out, she didn’t appreciate being blindfolded.
My first date ever was so bad, I looked up “emergency exits” on Google Maps.
My first date turned out to be a surprise blind date. Unfortunately, it was also a surprise for the person who set us up, as they got our names mixed up.
My first date was so bad, I ended up paying the bill and the therapist’s fee.
First dates are like job interviews, except instead of discussing your qualifications, you’re just trying not to spill spaghetti sauce on your shirt.
My first date was a disaster. I accidentally wore a t-shirt that said “Save the Date.”
On my first date, I accidentally ordered the most expensive thing on the menu. Thank you, dim lighting.
I accidentally brought my mom along on my first date. She gave us a scorecard at the end.
I found out on my first date that I have a talent for accidentally ordering the most expensive item on the menu.
I brought a “How to Survive Awkward Silences” book on my first date. It’s still untouched.
My first date was so awkward, I started pretending to be a mime to avoid conversation. It didn’t work, but at least I made people laugh.
I accidentally FaceTimed my best friend during my first date. They answered and started giving me dating advice on speakerphone.
My first date advice to anyone is to never let your date choose the movie. Nothing kills the mood faster than a horror film on a first date.
I finally went on a date with my crush, but I think I left my personality at home.
My first date went so well that I immediately started planning our wedding.
My date told me he’s a cat person, so I immediately ordered a mouse toy online.
My friend set me up on a blind date, turns out the blind part was accurate because I couldn’t see any future with that person.
My first date asked me if I believed in love at first sight, and I said, “I’m not sure, but I definitely believe in awkward eye contact.” .
My first date strategy is simple: I take them to an art museum so we can both pretend to be cultured while avoiding eye contact.
I thought my first date went well until they said, “Let’s just be friends…with benefits.”
On my first date, I accidentally told my date I loved them. They replied, “Thanks, I love bread too.”
I asked my date if they wanted to share dessert, they said yes, and then ate the whole thing.
My first date told me that they loved animals, so I brought my pet rock along for moral support.
My first date was a disaster. I accidentally sneezed while eating spaghetti and flung a meatball across the restaurant.
I was so nervous on my first date that when my date said they liked long walks on the beach, I replied with, “I prefer short walks to the fridge.” Smooth, right?
My first date was going great until I discovered that my date’s idea of fine dining was a drive-thru window.
I asked my date if they believe in love at first sight. They said, “No, but I’m willing to believe in free desserts on the first date.”
My first date was so boring, I seriously considered faking a sudden illness just to escape.
My first date took me to a comedy show, but the only thing funny was how desperately we were trying to impress each other.
My first date was so awkward, I think the restaurant staff started taking bets on how long it would last.
I asked my date if they believe in fate. They said, “I do, but I think it’s spelled ‘Date’.” Well, that’s awkward.
My first date asked me if I wanted to Netflix and chill. I said, “Sure, but only if you provide the Netflix and the chill.”
I brought my pet parrot on my first date, hoping it would break the ice. It ended up stealing my date’s sandwich and flying away.
I tried to impress my date by juggling knives, but it turns out they’re not a fan of danger or impromptu amputations.
I ordered a complicated dish on my first date and ended up struggling to eat it gracefully. Let’s just say, it wasn’t a match made in culinary heaven.
My first date was so awkward, I accidentally ordered a double cheeseburger and ate it with a knife and fork.
My first date was going great until I noticed the restaurant was playing “I Will Always Love You” by Whitney Houston. Turns out, it was on repeat.
On my first date, I tried to impress my partner with my cooking skills. Let’s just say the fire alarm was the most passionate thing in the room.
My first date plan is to take them to a corn maze and hope that getting lost together will create a strong bond.
My first date was so awkward, we both ended up pretending to text someone just to avoid conversation.
My first date was going great until I realized we were both talking about completely different Netflix shows.
The most awkward moment on my first date was when I accidentally called my date by my ex’s name.
My first date ever was so awkward, we both brought our parents.
My first date went so well that we agreed to skip straight to our second date.
I’m not saying my first date was bad, but we ended up at a restaurant called “Dine and Dash.”
On my first date, I brought flowers and chocolates. Turns out, she was allergic to both. It was a bloomin’ disaster.
My first date told me he was a magician. Turns out, he disappeared after paying the bill. I guess he really knew how to vanish!
My first date was like a rollercoaster ride – exciting at first, but left me feeling nauseous and regretful by the end.
My first date told me she wanted a man who is smart, funny, and sensitive… so I gave her a picture of Albert Einstein wearing a clown nose.
My date asked me if I was good with directions. I said, “Well, I may not know where I’m going, but I’m always up for an adventure.”
My first date was like a roller coaster ride – full of unexpected twists and turns, and a lot of screaming.
I went on a first date and the guy said he loved my personality… on my dating profile.
I like to break the ice on first dates by telling them that my family has a long history of unsuccessful relationships.
My first date asked me if I wanted to go for a walk, so I immediately put on my running shoes.
I asked my date if they believed in love at first sight, they said no, so I ran away really fast.
My date asked me if I’m into fitness, I replied, “Yeah, I do a lot of running…away from commitment.”
My first date was so bad, I’m considering adding it as a new level of torture in the Geneva Convention.
My first date asked me if I believe in love at first sight. I said, “Depends. Do you believe in free dinner?”
My first date was so bad, I considered asking for a refund on my time and emotional investment.
I brought a fake emergency call app on my first date, just in case I needed an escape plan. It actually came in handy.
On my first date, I accidentally spilled spaghetti sauce all over my white shirt. Let’s just say it was a saucy start.
My first date was so awkward, it felt like we were on a reality TV show called “The Bachelor of Awkwardness.”
I tried to impress my date by juggling. Turns out, it’s hard to impress someone when you drop all the balls.
My first date ended with a high five because we both agreed it was better than a hug.
I was so nervous on my first date that I accidentally ordered my food to go.
On my first date, I accidentally spilled red wine on myself and pretended I was attacked by vampire grapes.
I’m considering creating a dating app called “Connect the Dots” for people who love puzzles and awkward silences on first dates.
I knew it was a bad first date when my date asked me if I had ever considered joining a cult.
My first date took me to a haunted house. It was a scream!
My first date went so badly, we both agreed to delete each other from our Uber accounts.
I took my first date to a comedy club, but the only thing we laughed at was the two-drink minimum.
My first date told me he had a fear of commitment. I said, “That’s okay, I’m more afraid of gluten.”
My first date suggested we go stargazing, but forgot to bring a telescope. So we spent the night staring at each other instead.
On my first date, I accidentally revealed my entire search history. Needless to say, there was no second date.
My first date was so bad, I asked Siri for relationship advice. She responded with “Sorry, I can’t answer that.” .
I asked my first date if he had any hobbies and he replied, “I collect rejection letters.” Well, at least he’s passionate about something.
My first date took me to a magic show, and the magician made our chemistry disappear.
I took my first date to a fancy restaurant, but I forgot my wallet. We ended up washing dishes to pay the bill.
My first date was like a magic show, where my disappearing act was more impressive than any trick they performed.
I brought my pet goldfish on a first date, hoping it would create a romantic atmosphere until they asked why I was carrying a fishbowl in my pocket.
My date said they were spontaneous, so I surprised them by proposing. They never saw it coming…mainly because they ran away screaming.
I tried to impress my date by taking them to a fancy restaurant, but I couldn’t read the menu because it was in a different language. Let’s just say, it wasn’t a tasteful move.
My first date asked me what my favorite book was, and I panicked and said, “Facebook.”
During my first date, I tried to make a smooth move by telling a joke, but I ended up snorting milkshake through my nose instead.
My date said she wanted to go somewhere she’s never been before, so I took her to the kitchen.
My first date with a vegan was a disaster. Turns out, she didn’t appreciate me ordering a big juicy steak.
On my first date, I spilled wine on my shirt. My date said, “You should let it breathe.” I replied, “It already has, that’s why it smells.” She wasn’t impressed.
On my first date, I accidentally wore the same outfit as my date. We awkwardly laughed it off and pretended it was a couple’s costume.
My first date asked me if I believe in love at first sight, so I took a deep breath and said, “Let me look at you again.”
My first date was so awkward, we played rock, paper, scissors to decide who should pay the bill. I lost, twice.
My first date ended with a high-five because we both knew it was more of a friendship thing.
I brought my pet goldfish on my first date, thinking it would be a great conversation starter. Little did I know, my date was deathly afraid of fish.
My first date asked me if I’m adventurous, so I ordered extra spicy salsa and cried throughout the meal.
I took my date to a fancy restaurant and accidentally used their bread as a napkin.
My first date asked me if I have any hidden talents, so I replied, “Yes, but they’re still hidden.”
My first date was like a romantic comedy, except instead of a happy ending, it was more like a tragicomedy with a lot of cringe-worthy moments.
I was so nervous on my first date that I accidentally left my wallet at home, but luckily my date was willing to split the awkwardness instead.
On my first date, I accidentally sneezed out a booger in the shape of a heart.
My idea of a perfect first date is one where we both forget our wallets.
My first date was so bad, I considered sending a thank-you note to my ex for setting the bar so low.
I told my date I’m a great cook, then accidentally set the microwave on fire.
My first date ever ended with a high five.
My first date was so bad that even my GPS said, “Recalculating, avoid this person at all costs.”
My first date was going great until they asked if I had any siblings. I replied, “No, just a dungeon full of them.”
During my first date, I accidentally called my date by my ex’s name. Luckily, they had a good sense of humor and said, “Well, at least we know your type!”
My first date asked me if I was a dog or a cat person. I said I was more of a “food delivery” person.
I thought my first date was going great until they asked if I wanted to join their pyramid scheme.
My first date told me he had a great sense of humor, but all he did was laugh at his own jokes. It was a one-man comedy show.
My first date thought it would be romantic to take me to a cemetery. Needless to say, it was a grave mistake.
I took my first date to an arcade because I heard she was into playing games.
First dates are like trying to assemble IKEA furniture. You start with excitement, but end up with confusion and disappointment.
My first date ended with me accidentally setting off the fire alarm at the restaurant. Safe to say, we didn’t have a second date.
I thought it would be romantic to bring my date flowers, but apparently, they were allergic to daisies and spent the night sneezing on me.
My date said they were a good listener, but all they did was nod and smile while I talked about my exes for hours.
My first date told me they were a stand-up comedian, but I think they were just trying to make our date a joke.
I tried to impress my date by speaking a different language, but I ended up ordering a pizza instead of saying hello.
My first date ever was so bad, we ended up making plans for our second date… with other people.
I asked my date if they have any hobbies, they said they collect napkins from failed dates.
My first date was so bad, we had to call it a “last date.”
My first date was so awkward, we both agreed to pretend it never happened.
I brought my pet parrot on my first date for a little extra conversation. Let’s just say the bird stole the show.
My first date was so bad, I need a restraining order…against myself.
On my first date, I tried to impress my date by ordering the most expensive thing on the menu. Little did I know, it was the dessert menu.
I showed up to my first date with a bouquet of flowers, only to find out that my date was allergic. Talk about a thorny situation!
My first date was like a horror movie – we both screamed when the bill arrived.
On my first date, I accidentally ordered the spiciest dish on the menu and spent the entire night trying not to cry.
I took my date to a fancy restaurant, but I accidentally used the butter knife as a toothpick.
My first date was like a romantic comedy, except without the romance or the comedy.
On my first date, I tried to impress my date by juggling oranges. Let’s just say it didn’t go as planned.
My first date was so awkward, we both ended up swiping left in person.
I asked my date if they were a magician because they made all my hopes and dreams disappear within the first 10 minutes.
My first date ended with a high-five because we both agreed that was the best we could do.
I went on a blind date once. Turns out, she was blind too. It was love at first touch.
My first date took me to a fancy restaurant, but all I could think about was how to pronounce “quinoa.”
I tried to make a good first impression on my date by complimenting their appearance, but I accidentally said, “You look just like my mom.”
My first date was so bad, I had to pretend to be deaf just to get out of it.
My first date ever was like a roller coaster ride, except instead of thrilling twists and turns, it was just a lot of awkward silence and uncomfortable laughter.
My first date was so bad, I asked for a refund.
The highlight of my first date was when my date asked me if I believed in ghosts, and then proceeded to introduce me to their imaginary friend.
I had a first date at a fancy restaurant, but I couldn’t tell if I was more nervous about the food or the conversation.
My first date thought it would be romantic to have a candlelit dinner. It would have been if I hadn’t accidentally set the tablecloth on fire.
My first date was at a theme park, and I screamed so loud on every ride that people thought I was auditioning for a horror movie.
On my first date, I ordered spaghetti and ended up wearing more sauce than I actually ate. It was a real saucy disaster.
My first date was so nerve-wracking, I forgot my own name and introduced myself as “Oops.” .
I asked my first date if she was into fitness, and she replied, “Fitness? More like fitness whole pizza in my mouth!”
I took my date to an arcade, but I was the only one getting any action.
My first date brought his pet snake along and I thought, “Well, this relationship is off to a hisss-terical start.”
On my first date, I tried to impress my date by doing a magic trick, but I accidentally made our tablecloth disappear.
My first date was like a math problem: no matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t solve for “x” in the equation of romance.
On my first date, I accidentally called my date by my ex’s name. Awkward apologies followed.
My first date took me to a fancy restaurant, and I found out they were only interested in taking pictures of the food for their Instagram.
I took my date to a fancy restaurant. She said, “I love the ambiance, but the menu is a bit over my head.” I replied, “Don’t worry, they have chicken nuggets.”
My first date felt like a job interview, complete with sweaty palms and desperate attempts to impress.
I accidentally ordered the same food as my date, now we’re in a pasta-tense situation.
My first date ended with me saying, “I’ll call you” and then promptly changing my phone number.
I asked my date if she believed in love at first sight. She said, “Well, that depends on how much money you have.”
I tried to impress my date by taking them to a fancy restaurant, but they were more interested in the breadsticks than me.
My first date ended with me accidentally setting off the car alarm when I tried to give her a goodnight kiss.
My date asked me if I believe in ghosts. I said, “No, but I believe in disappearing after the bill arrives.”
I went on my first date last night and the guy said I had “a face only a mother could love.” Good thing I’m not dating my mom.
My date asked me if I believe in love at first sight. I told her, “Of course, it saves time.” She didn’t find it as funny as I did.
I thought my first date went well until I realized I had been talking to a mirror the whole time.
First dates are like job interviews, except at the end, you don’t even get a rejection email.
On my first date, I tried to impress her by telling her I’m a wine connoisseur. She asked me to pronounce “Merlot” and I said, “Mehr-love.”
I tried to impress my date by showing off my cooking skills, but ended up setting off the fire alarm while making toast.
On my first date, I tried to impress the person by ordering the most expensive thing on the menu. Turns out, it was the restaurant’s WiFi password.
I brought my pet parrot on my first date. It kept repeating, “Abort mission, abort mission.” Needless to say, it didn’t end well.
I went on a first date with a mathematician. He asked me, “Do you want to meet for coffee? Or should we just wing it?”
On my first date, I accidentally tripped and spilled my drink all over my date. I guess you could say it was love at first Sprite.
I took my date to an art gallery, but she thought we were going to a fancy supermarket for abstract vegetables.
My first date ended with me accidentally setting off the fire alarm in the restaurant.
My first date said he was into “intellectual conversations,” so I asked him to define the meaning of life. He changed the subject.
My first date asked me if I could perform a magic trick, so I disappeared.
My date said she wanted someone who could make her laugh. So I handed her a mirror.
My first date took me to a comedy show, but I laughed so hard at the jokes that I accidentally snorted in the middle of the performance. Talk about stealing the spotlight!
My first date experience was like watching a horror movie, but without the fun part.
My first date asked me if I believed in love at first sight. I said yes and accidentally bumped into a waiter carrying a tray of drinks. Love at first spill.
I accidentally set off a fire alarm on my first date because I wanted to see if they were good at handling emergencies. Turns out they were not impressed.
My first date was so bad, the waiter asked me if I wanted a doggy bag for my dignity.
On my first date, I tried impressing her by speaking French. Turns out, she spoke French too, and caught me saying “I have no idea what I’m saying.”
On my first date, I spilled a whole glass of wine on my date’s lap. They said it was a “red flag.”
My first date was so awkward, I’m pretty sure my cringe face got a cringe face of its own.
My date told me he was a bodybuilder, but I think he misunderstood what “building” means.
My first date was so bad, I started a GoFundMe page to cover the cost of therapy.
On my first date, I tried to impress my date with my cooking skills. Let’s just say the smoke alarm wasn’t impressed either.
My first date asked me if I was free next weekend. I said, “I don’t know, I’ll have to check with my cats.”
My date asked me if I had any hidden talents. I said, “I can make a 3-hour movie seem like 10 minutes.” She said, “Wow, that’s impressive. How?” I replied, “Just invite me to one.”
My first date with a dentist was awkward. Every time I smiled, she kept giving me floss.
My first date was going really well until I accidentally called my date by my ex’s name. It’s safe to say that didn’t end well.
My first date went so well, I’m thinking of asking for a second restraining order.
My date asked me if I believed in destiny, so I handed them a fortune cookie that said, “Outlook not so good.”
On my first date, we played hide and seek. Unfortunately, she’s still hiding.
My first date asked me if I believed in love at first sight. I said, “I’m more of a love at first swipe kind of person.”
On my first date, we went to a seafood restaurant. I ordered the lobster and my date said, “Looks like we’ve cracked the ice.” The puns were reel-y getting out of hand.
I tried to impress my date with my dancing skills on our first date, but I ended up tripping over my own feet and falling flat on my face. It was a toe-tally embarrassing moment.
My first date brought their pet parrot, who kept repeating, “Abort mission! Abort mission!”
On my first date, I accidentally spilled my drink all over myself and the person said, “I guess it’s a good thing we’re not compatible, even gravity is against us.”
My first date was like a comedy show, except I was the only one laughing at my own jokes.
On my first date, I accidentally used the wrong fork. My date said, “Don’t worry, I won’t judge you. But the waiter might.”
My first date was going well until I accidentally called them by my ex’s name. Turns out, they were my ex.
I thought my first date went well until my date said, “Let’s just be friends.” I didn’t even know we were dating.
My first date asked me if I have any hidden talents, I replied, “Well, I can eat a whole pizza by myself, if that counts.”
My date complimented my outfit and asked where I got it. I said, “Well, I’m not allowed in that store anymore, but the clothes are fabulous.”
My date mentioned that they’re a fan of board games, so I made sure to bring my “Sorry!” game just in case things didn’t go well.
My first date brought their pet cat along, and it turned out to be more interested in me than my date.
My first date ended with us hugging, or as I like to call it, “premature evacuation”
On my first date, I accidentally called my date by my ex’s name. It was an awkward mix of embarrassment and nostalgia.
My first date was going so well until I accidentally tripped over a curb and face-planted right in front of my crush.
On my first date, we watched a horror movie, and my date screamed louder than the characters.
On my first date, I told her I wanted to be a comedian. She replied, “Well, you’re halfway there, you’re not funny.”
My first date took me to a comedy club, and I laughed so hard at the jokes that I accidentally snorted soda out of my nose.

First Date Dad Jokes

First Date Dad Jokes provide just the right amount of humor and lighthearted fun to ease the tension and break the ice on a first date.

Combining elements of silliness with a touch of groan-worthy puns, these jokes are sure to lighten the mood.

They may not be the jokes that you tell to win someone over, but they’re definitely the jokes that will make your date remember you for your unique humor.

Get ready for some laughter, some eye-rolls, but most importantly, get ready for a memorable time.

Here are some First Date Dad Jokes that are bound to make your date a memorable one:

What did the coffee say to his first date? “Let’s espresso our love for each other!”
Why did the bicycle take its first date to the movies? Because it wanted to “tandem” watch a romantic film!
What did the ocean say to the beach on their first date? “I’m really tide down by you!”
Why did the calendar refuse to go on a first date? Because it didn’t want to be dated!
Why did the pencil go on a first date with the eraser? Because they had a good connection and wanted to erase any doubts!
Why did the clock go on a first date? Because it was “tickled” to spend time with someone special!
Why did the math book bring its parent on its first date? Because it needed someone to solve its problems!
Why did the first date bring a watch on their night out? Because they wanted to make sure they had a “second” date!
Why did the scarecrow bring a map on his first date? Because he wanted to show his date he’s outstanding in his field!
Why was the math book sad after the first date? It couldn’t solve for love!
What did the sushi say to his first date? “I’m soy happy we rolled into each other’s lives!”
Why did the first date go to the zoo? Because they wanted to see if they had any “animal” attraction!
What did the calendar say to its first date? “I can’t wait to see you again… date after date!”
Why did the bicycle take its date to the movies? Because it wanted to peddle its way into their heart!
Why did the chef go on a first date with a baker? Because they both needed some serious “flour” power in their relationship!
What did the clock say to its first date? “I don’t mean to alarm you, but I think we’re ticking all the right boxes!”
Why did the skeleton ask the girl on a first date? Because he couldn’t “bare” to be alone!
Why did the book go on a first date with the dictionary? Because they both wanted to define their relationship!
What did the pencil say to the paper on their first date? “You’re quite sketchy, but I’m drawn to you!”
Why did the first date go to the bakery? Because they wanted to roll in the dough together!
What did the grape say to the raisin on their first date? “I’m raisin’ the bar for our relationship!”
Why do scientists recommend going on a first date to the park? Because the chemistry is always sparking!
Why did the clock go on a first date? It wanted to “tick” all the right boxes!
What did the skeleton say to his first date? “I’ve got a bone to pick with you!”
What did the first date say to the garlic bread? “You’re the butter half of my life!”
Why did the first date at the ice cream shop go so well? Because they both had great “scoopability”!
What did the earthquake say to the other earthquake on their first date? “You rock my world!”
Why did the bicycle take the car on a first date? Because it didn’t want to tire out!
Why did the book go on a first date? Because it wanted to start a new chapter in its life!
Why did the cake go on a first date? Because it felt like it needed a little extra icing in its life!
What did the scientist say to the atom on their first date? “I feel a strong attraction between us!”
Why did the baseball player bring string to his first date? In case he needed to tie the knot!
What did the hot dog say to the hamburger on their first date? “You’re my grillfriend!”
Why did the clock go on a date with the calendar? Because they wanted to have a good time, minute by minute and day by day!
Why did the clock break up with the calendar after their first date? It realized they didn’t have any future plans!
Why did the calendar go on a first date? Because it was looking for a good time, day or night!
Why did the light bulb go on a first date? Because it was hoping for a bright future together!
Why did the pencil go on a first date with the eraser? Because it knew they would make a great “match”!
What do you call a bear on its first date? “Grrr-eat” company!
Why did the bicycle take its date to the movies? Because it wanted to share a “wheel-y” good time!
Why did the ice cream go on a first date? Because it wanted to be sundae lovers!
Why did the music teacher go on a first date? She was looking for a “note”-worthy companion!
Why did the calendar refuse to go on a first date? Because it always needed more time!
Why did the peanut go on a date with the raisin? Because it wanted to be a little nutty!
Why did the golf club go on a first date? Because it was looking for a hole in one!
Why did the coffee file a police report after its first date? Because it got mugged!
Why did the first date at the art museum become awkward? Because they couldn’t agree on what was “abstract” or “concrete” conversation!
Why did the tree go on a first date? Because it was branching out and wanted to meet someone new!
Why did the bicycle take its first date to the park? Because it wanted to wheel-y impress them!
Why did the bicycle take its helmet on a first date? It wanted to protect its two-tire relationship!
Why did the math book go on a first date with the history book? Because it heard they have great chemistry!
Why did the first date bring a deck of cards to the coffee shop? Because they wanted to break the “ice” with some card tricks!
Why did the calendar refuse a second date? Because it heard all the dates are numbered!
Why did the banana go on a first date with the orange? Because it heard they make a-peeling couple!
Why did the computer go on a first date? Because it heard its motherboard was looking for a solid connection!
Why did the clock go on a first date? Because it was ready to “watch” some romance unfold!
Why was the math textbook always going on first dates? Because it had a lot of problems!
Why did the first date to the library not go as planned? Because they couldn’t stop checking each other out!
Why did the music teacher take his first date to the orchestra? Because he wanted a romantic symphony-phony!
Why did the math book go on a first date? Because it had too many problems and needed some solutions!
Why did the broom take the vacuum cleaner on its first date? It heard they had great suction!
Why did the bicycle take its first date to the movies? Because it wanted to start off on a two-wheel romance!
Why did the bee take his first date to the flower garden? Because he wanted to show her the birds and the bees!
Why did the bicycle bring a flower to its first date? Because it wanted to pedal its feelings!
Why did the first date at the bakery not work out? Because it was a little too crumby!
Why did the scarecrow take his first date to the cornfield? Because he wanted to show her a-MAIZE-ing time!
Why do bees have sticky hair on their first dates? Because they use honeycombs!
Why did the lemon ask the lime out on a first date? Because it wanted to make some sweet lemon-limeade!
What do you call a snobbish criminal going on a first date? A condescending con!
Why did the mirror go on a first date? It wanted to reflect on its love life!
What did the flower say to its first date? “I hope our love continues to blossom!”
Why did the computer take its date to the beach? Because it wanted to surf the net together!
Why did the sunflower go on a first date? Because it wanted to bloom in the presence of love!
Why did the first date bring a ladder to the restaurant? Because they heard it had great “high” cuisine!
What did the candle say to the match on their first date? “I’m really fired up to be here with you!”
Why did the waiter spill soup on his first date? Because he was too nervous and couldn’t keep his cool!
Why did the tomato turn bright red during its first date? It was a little “saucy”!
Why did the first date to the zoo become a disaster? Because the cheetah was always running away!
Why did the first date to the movie theater end early? Because it couldn’t find a rom-com seat!
Why did the scarecrow bring a first aid kit on his first date? In case he lost his stuffing!
What did the coffee say to the creamer on their first date? “I’ve bean looking forward to this!”
Why did the light bulb go on a first date with the power outlet? They had an electric connection!
Why did the bicycle ask the flower on a first date? Because it was tired of pedaling alone!
What did the guitar say to the musician on their first date? “You really string me along!”
Why did the first date at the zoo go so well? Because they had a wild time together!
Why did the computer go on a first date? It heard its mouse click with someone special!
What did the man say to his date when they went to the seafood restaurant? “I’m hooked on you!”
Why did the computer go on a first date? Because it heard its data was compatible with hers!
What did the man say to his date at the ice cream shop? “I’ll be your flavorite date!”
Why did the first date bring a map to the amusement park? Because they didn’t want to “roller-coaster” their relationship!
What did the math teacher say to his first date? “You’re the solution to all my equations!”
Why did the skeleton take his first date to the amusement park? Because he knew they would have a spine-tingling time!
What did the big flower say to the little flower on their first date? “You’re really blossoming!”
Why did the scarecrow take his first date to the cornfield? Because he wanted to have some stalk-ing points!
Why did the cell phone break up with the landline after their first date? They couldn’t find a good connection!
Why did the banana go on a first date? Because it was tired of being single and wanted to split with someone!
What did the cheese say to itself before its first date? “Gouda luck!”
What did the blanket say to its first date? “You make me feel so warm and fuzzy inside!”
Why did the boat take its first date to the water park? Because they wanted to make a splash together!
Why did the computer take its first date to the beach? Because it wanted its relationship to have a strong connection!
What did the big flower say to the little flower on their first date? “Hey bud, how’s it growing?”
Why did the firefighter take their first date to the BBQ restaurant? Because they wanted a smokin’ hot time!
Why did the broom take the mop on a first date? Because it heard they swept each other off their feet!
Why did the scarecrow bring a second shirt on his first date? In case he got a little stuffed!
Why did the math textbook go on a first date? It was looking for some real problems to solve!

First Date Jokes for Kids

First date jokes for kids are a delightful concoction of fun, laughter, and a dash of innocent romance.

They bring to life the amusing and often silly scenarios of young love, sparking giggles and hearty laughs.

These jokes help children understand and appreciate humor in everyday situations, nurturing their sense of wit and light-heartedness.

They also subtly introduce the concept of social interactions and relationships in a fun and engaging way.

More than that, first date jokes for kids offer a refreshing perspective on the world of ‘grown-up’ dating, turning it into an exciting story filled with humor and joy.

Ready to dive into this world of fun and laughter?

Here are some jokes that’ll have them giggling into their popcorn and soda:

What did the ocean say to the beach on their first date? “You make me feel shore-ly amazing!”
What did the fish say to its first date? You’re o-fish-ally the one for me!
Why did the two birds go on a first date? Because they wanted to “tweet” each other nicely!
What did the ocean say to the beach on their first date? “Wanna go for a “wave” together?”.
What did the flower say to the bee on their first date? “Buzz me later!”
What did the spoon say to the fork on their first date? “I’m so glad we can “spoon” together!”
Why did the basketball player bring their hoop on their first date? Just in case they wanted to “shoot” some hoops together!
Why did the banana go out with the prune on their first date? Because he couldn’t “peel” his eyes off her!
What did one traffic light say to the other on their first date? “Stop looking at me, I’m changing!” .
Why did the orange go on a second date with the banana? Because it couldn’t peel its eyes off of him!
Why did the chicken bring a stopwatch on its first date? It didn’t want to lay an egg and be late!
Why did the broom take his date to the dance? Because he wanted to sweep her off her feet!
What did the salt say to the pepper on their first date? “We make the perfect seasoning!”
Why did the snowman take his girlfriend to the fancy restaurant on their first date? Because he wanted to show her he’s a cool guy!
What did the pencil say to the paper on their first date? “I dot my I’s on you!”
Why did the pencil bring a rubber on its first date? Just in case they made any mistakes!
What did one ocean say to the other ocean on their first date? Nothing, they just waved!
Why did the math book go on a date with the history book? They wanted to multiply their knowledge and make some good dates together!
What did one star say to the other star on their first date? “You light up my universe!”
Why did the pencil break up with its first date? Because they weren’t sharp enough!
Why did the tomato turn red during its first date? Because it saw the salad “dressing” up!
Why did the computer go on a first date? Because it had a great connection with someone special!
Why did the umbrella take its date to the art gallery? Because it wanted to make a splash with someone creative!
What did the cucumber say to the lettuce on their first date? “Lettuce romaine friends forever!”
What did the boy candle say to the girl candle on their first date? “You light up my life!”
Why did the hamburger take the hotdog on a first date? They heard they made a great “pair.” .
Why did the basketball player go on a first date? Because he wanted to “shoot his shot” with love!
Why did the computer go on a date with a floppy disk? He heard she had all the right “bytes.” .
Why did the computer go on a date with the smartphone? They both wanted to have a byte together!
Why did the pencil break up with the paper on their first date? They had no chemistry!
What did the clock say to its first date? “I had a “great time” spending every second with you!”
What did the cat say to its date? “You are “purr”-fect for me!”.
What do you call two birds on their first date? Tweet-hearts!
What did the clock say to its first date? “I’m always ticking about you!”
Why did the scarecrow bring a map on his first date? Because he didn’t want to get lost in the field of love!
Why did the ice cream get so nervous on its first date? Because it was “melting” for its partner!
Why did the clock go on a first date? Because it wanted to have a timely conversation!
What did the ocean say to the beach on their first date? “I think you’re shore-ly beautiful!”
Why did the tree take its first date to the movies? Because it wanted to branch out!
Why did the scarecrow take the pumpkin on a first date? Because he heard she had a great head on her shoulders!
Why did the pencil bring a pen on its first date? In case it needed to “draw” some conversation!
What did the boy pickle say to the girl pickle on their first date? “You mean a great dill to me!”
Why did the pencil take the eraser out on their first date? They wanted to make sure they had a “rubber-y” good time.
Why did the skeleton bring his date to the haunted house? Because he wanted to impress her with his funny bone!
What did the bread say to the butter on their first date? “You’re my perfect spread-mate!”
Why did the skeleton go on a first date? To find a good “body” to love!
What did the bee say to the flower on their first date? “I’m pollen in love with you!”
Why did the pencil bring a date to the party? Because it heard it was sketchy being alone!
Why did the clock take the calendar on a date? It was about time they got together!
Why did the computer take its date to the drive-in movie? Because it wanted to watch a ROM-com!
What did the carrot say to the broccoli on their first date? “You look so stalk-able!”
Why did the tomato bring a bandage on its first date? It didn’t want to get too saucy and end up getting hurt!
What did the baseball glove say to the ball on their first date? “You caught my attention!”
What did the bee say to its flower date on their first outing? “You’re bee-autiful!”
Why did the scarecrow bring a pumpkin on its first date? Because it was looking for some “pumpkin spice” in its life!
Why did the bicycle take its date to the movies? Because it wanted to sit close and “tandem”!
Why did the bee take the flower on their first date? They wanted to pollinate their love!
What did the light bulb say to the outlet on their first date? “I’m attracted to you!”
Why did the broccoli bring flowers on its first date? To cauliflower its love!
What did the grapes do on their first date? They went to the vine-ding!
What did the clock say to the calendar on their first date? “I’m hooked on you, let’s go on a date every second!”
Why did the scarecrow bring a sunflower on its first date? Because it wanted to show it had stalk-ing potential!
Why did the toothbrush take the toothpaste on a date? They were a perfect match!
Why did the tree take its date to the amusement park? Because it wanted to show her a “tree-mendous” time!
What did the boy vegetable say to the girl vegetable on their first date? Lettuce always be together!
Why did the broom take the dustpan out on a first date? Because it wanted to sweep them off their feet!
Why did the carrot blush during its first date? Because it had a crush on the radish!
Why did the cookie go on a first date with a marshmallow? Because it wanted someone sweet!
Why did the scarecrow go on a first date? Because it was looking for some “hay” romance!
Why did the scarecrow take his girlfriend on their first date to the cornfield? Because he heard it was “a-maize-ing”!
What did the shy vegetable say to his crush on their first date? “Lettuce get to know each other better!”
Why did the broccoli feel nervous on its first date? It was afraid of getting steamed up!
What did the snowman say to the snowwoman on their first date? “You’re really cool!”
Why did the bee take the butterfly on a first date? Because it wanted to make a good buzz impression!
Why did the spoon ask the fork out on a date? They wanted to have a spoonful of love!
What did the boy flower say to the girl flower on their first date? “I’m falling for you petal by petal!”
Why did the jellyfish bring a comb on their first date? Because it wanted to look sharp!
Why did the spoon blush on its first date? It couldn’t “spoon”tain its excitement!
Why did the math book bring a ruler on its first date? To measure their chemistry!
What did one toilet say to the other toilet on their first date? You flush me off my feet!
Why did the kangaroo bring a map on its first date? In case it got “hop-lost” in love!
Why did the scarecrow take his first date to the cornfield? Because he heard they were going to “stalk” about their future!
Why did the watermelon go on a first date with the honeydew melon? Because it couldn’talope!
Why did the strawberry go on a date with the pineapple? Because it was looking for a little “juice”!
What did the drum say to its date? “I find you very “beat”-iful!”.
Why did the scarecrow blush on its first date? Because it was out standing in its field!
Why did the flower bring chocolates on its first date? To “blossom” their relationship!
What did the salt say to the pepper on their first date? “I find you very a-peeling!”
Why did the book go on a first date with the bookmark? Because they wanted to have a good story together!
Why did the pencil break up with the paper on their first date? It felt too much pressure!
What did the watermelon say to the cantaloupe on their first date? “You’re one in a melon!”
What did the grape say to its first date? “You make me feel “vine”credibly happy!”
What did one strawberry say to the other on their first date? I find you berry attractive!
What did the soda say to the ice cream on their first date? “You float my root beer!”
Why did the strawberry go out with the pineapple on their first date? Because they found each other a-peeling!
Why did the carrot take the celery out on their first date? Because they wanted to have a “stalk” about their future!
Why did the computer bring a mouse on its first date? To “click” with its partner!
Why did the clock bring a map on its first date? It didn’t want to waste any time getting lost!
What did the pancake say to its first date? “I flip for you, syrupcially!”
Why did the teddy bear bring honey on its first date? To make it “beary” sweet!
What did the plate say to the fork on their first date? Can I have a little peace and gravy?
What did the grape say to the raisin on their first date? “You’re looking grape-t today!”
Why did the watermelon go out with a honeydew on their first date? Because they couldn’t elope!
Why did the pencil take its date to the amusement park? Because it wanted to go on a “roller-coaster” romance!
Why did the hamburger bring flowers on its first date? It wanted to “meat” the right impression!
What did one hat say to the other hat on their first date? You go ahead, I’ll stay here and cap-tivate the audience!
Why did the orange go out with a prune on their first date? Because he couldn’t find a date!
Why did the math book go on a date with the history book? Because they had a lot of chapters in common!
Why did the tree go on a first date? Because it was ready to branch out and find love!
Why did the scarecrow bring a pillow on its first date? In case there was a corny movie!
Why did the scarecrow bring a corn on his first date? He wanted to impress his “stalk”-er.
What did the pencil say to the eraser on their first date? “You make all my mistakes disappear!”
Why did the pencil take the eraser on its first date? It needed someone to rub out any mistakes!
Why did the cookie ask the milk out on a first date? Because it was feeling crumby alone!
What did the computer say to the keyboard on their first date? “You’re just my type!”
Why did the computer ask the router out on a date? Because they had a strong connection!
Why did the flower bring a flashlight on its first date? It wanted to make a good impression in the light of their love!
Why did the orange take the apple on their first date? Because it couldn’t resist its core charm!
Why did the football take its date to the dance? Because it wanted to “pass” the romance test!
What did one cupcake say to the other cupcake on their first date? “You’re so sweet, we make the perfect pair!”
Why did the apple go out with a fig on their first date? Because it couldn’t find a date with someone more ap-peeling!
Why did the bicycle ask the motorcycle out on a date? It wanted to see if they could have a wheel-y good time!
Why did the pencil take the eraser on its first date? In case it made any mistakes in love!

First Date Jokes for Adults

Who says that first dates have to be all nerves and no laughs?

First date jokes for adults are the perfect way to break the ice, infusing humor into a potentially tense situation, while maintaining an air of sophistication.

Much like the anticipation before a first date, these jokes are designed to titillate, amuse, and add a dash of risqué, creating an unforgettable laughing spell.

These jokes are perfect for lightening the mood, getting a conversation started, or simply bringing a smile to your date’s face.

So, if you’re looking for a way to make your first date a memorable one, here are some first date jokes that are perfect for adults:

Why did the math book go on a first date? It was hoping to find someone who could complement its odd angles!
Why did the first date bring a chef’s hat? Because they wanted to “spice” things up and cook up some romance!
What did the first date say when asked if they wanted dessert? “I’m already sweet enough!”
Why did the first date bring a broom to the movie theater? Because they heard it was a sweeping romance!
Why did the tomato turn red on its first date? It couldn’t ketchup with its own lovey-dovey feelings!
Why did the first date bring a stopwatch to dinner? They wanted to make sure they didn’t waste any time before falling in love!
Why did the first date go to the comedy club? They wanted to test if they had the same sense of humor and chemistry!
Why did the girl bring a stopwatch on her first date? She wanted to see if love could stand the test of time!
Why did the first date bring a stopwatch? Because they knew it was “love at first sight” and wanted to capture the moment!
What did the first date say when asked about their ideal partner? “Someone who can make me laugh, even if they’re terrible at telling jokes, just like you!”
What did the first date say when asked if they liked spicy food? “I can handle anything, as long as it’s not your hotness!”
What did the first date say when asked if they were nervous? “No, I’m just practicing my poker face. Hopefully, I don’t fold under the pressure!”
Why did the music teacher go on a first date? They were hoping for a “harmonious” connection!
Why did the first date bring a ladder to the movie theater? They wanted to make sure there were no awkward heights during the first kiss scene!
Why did the first date bring a pencil to the concert? Because they heard there would be a lot of notes!
Why did the skeleton go on a first date? It wanted to find a “bone-afide” connection!
Why did the first date bring a ruler to the park? To measure their compatibility, of course!
What did one first date say to the other when they met at the restaurant? “I’ll have chemistry with you, but let’s hope the food doesn’t have any!”
Why did the skeleton bring his own seasoning on the first date? He wanted to spice things up!
Why did the first date take a pet goldfish to the park? They wanted to break the ice with a “fin-tastic” conversation starter!
Why did the first date bring a candle to the restaurant? They wanted to set the mood and light a spark between them!
Why did the snowman take his first date to the party? Because he wanted to break the ice!
Why did the musician go on a first date? He wanted to hit all the right notes with his partner!
Why did the book lover take their first date to the library? They wanted to start a novel romance!
Why did the first date bring a ladder? Because they wanted to take their relationship to new heights!
Why did the skeleton bring his own food on a first date? He didn’t have the guts to ask his date out for dinner!
Why did the bee ask the flower out on a first date? It wanted to “pollinate” a romantic relationship!
Why did the gardener take their date to the flower shop? They wanted to “blossom” their relationship!
Why did the girl bring a map on her first date? She didn’t want to get lost in his eyes!
What did the first date say when asked if they enjoyed hiking? “Only if it’s a hike towards your heart!”
Why did the witch take her first date to the broom factory? Because she wanted a sweeper romance!
Why did the first date at the coffee shop go so smoothly? They had a latte in common!
Why did the first date bring a deck of cards? Because they wanted to “deal” with any awkward moments and have a fun time!
Why did the math book refuse to go on a first date? It had too many “problems” to deal with already!
What did the nervous guy bring on his first date? His “A-game” and a breath mint!
Why did the first date bring a dictionary? Because they wanted to define their relationship right from the start!
Why did the skeleton go on a first date? Because he heard his date had a great sense of humor – she was a real rib-tickler!
Why did the chef go on a first date? He wanted to meet someone to spice up his life and add a dash of love!
Why did the pencil go on a first date? It wanted to “draw” some romance into its life!
What did the first date say when asked about their favorite pickup line? “Are you a bank loan? Because you have my interest!”
Why did the tomato turn red on its first date? It caught sight of the attractive ketchup bottle!
Why did the sunflower go on a first date with the cactus? It was attracted to its prickly personality!
What did the first date say when asked if they had any hobbies? “I collect heartbeats… when I’m near you, mine races!”
Why did the first date go to the gym? They wanted to make a good first impression, even if it meant sweating it out!
Why did the painter bring their easel on a first date? They wanted to “draw” their date’s attention!
Why did the first date bring a map? Because they were afraid of getting lost in each other’s eyes!
Why did the computer programmer bring a keyboard on his first date? He wanted to make a good first “type” impression!
Why did the first date at the art museum become a masterpiece? They both had an eye for each other!
Why did the baker go on a first date? They wanted to “dough” something special together!
Why did the astronaut take his first date to the moon? Because he wanted their love to be out of this world!
Why did the ghost go on a first date? He wanted to boo-tifully sweep his date off her feet!
Why did the ghost take his first date to the haunted house? Because he wanted to have a BOO-tiful time!
What did the napkin say to the glass of water on a first date? “You make me feel so absorbent!”
Why did the first date bring a map to the movie theater? They wanted to navigate their way through the romance!
What did the man say to his date when she asked about his hobbies? “I collect phone numbers, would you like to be my newest addition?”
Why did the bee go on a first date? It heard its honey was looking for some “buzz-worthy” company!
Why did the geologist take their date to the beach? They wanted to see if there was a “rock-solid” connection!
Why did the dog bring flowers on its first date? It wanted to avoid any puppy love!
Why did the first date bring a telescope to the rooftop bar? They wanted to see if the stars were aligning for a perfect night!
What did the woman say to her date when he asked if she believed in love at first sight? “No, but I believe in food at first sight, so let’s grab dinner!”
Why did the first date bring a broom? To sweep each other off their feet!
What did the boy octopus say to the girl octopus on their first date? “I wanna hold your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand!”
Why did the astronaut go on a first date? They wanted to show their partner the stars and make their love “out of this world”!
What did the first date say when asked about their hobbies? “I collect hearts, and I hope to add yours to my collection!”
Why did the girl bring a camera on her first date? She wanted to capture the moment they fell in love, just in case it was a picture-perfect date!
Why did the scarecrow never go on a first date? It was afraid of being stood up!
Why did the first date bring a map to the restaurant? They didn’t want to get lost in each other’s eyes!
Why did the first date bring a stopwatch to the coffee shop? They wanted to make sure they had the perfect blend of chemistry and timing!
Why did the math teacher go on a first date? It was a calculated risk!
Why did the first date bring a ladder to the restaurant? Because they heard the food was out of this world!
Why did the chef go on a first date with a baker? They kneaded some love in their lives!
Why did the first date go to the bakery? To find a sweet roll!
Why did the photographer go on a first date? He wanted to capture the perfect picture of love!
What did the chemistry majors do on their first date? They had great chemistry and a lot of potential!
Why did the first date bring a map to the movie theater? In case they fell head over heels!
What do you call a first date with a mathematician? A prime opportunity for romance!
Why did the scarecrow go on a first date? It was trying to find its perfect “soul-straw” mate!
Why did the first date take place at the bakery? Because they kneaded some love!
What do you call a first date that’s full of puns? A “dinner and puns” night!
Why did the bee take its date to the hive? It wanted to show them a honey of a time!
Why did the first date bring a camera to the coffee shop? They wanted to capture the moment they fell head over heels for each other!
Why did the vampire take his first date to the movies? He heard it was a “fang”-tastic time!
Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything, just like my dating history!
What did the first date say when asked about their favorite music? “I love romantic songs, especially the ones that make my heart skip a beat, just like you!”
Why did the computer go on a first date? Because it had been chatting online all day!
What did the calendar say to the first date? “Let’s make a date!”
Why did the first date bring a compass on their walk in the park? They wanted to make sure they were always heading in the right direction towards love!
What did the math book say to the history book on their first date? “You can count on me for a great time!”
Why did the first date at the zoo end abruptly? They couldn’t bear the awkward pandas!
What did the first date say when asked about their favorite song? “It’s ‘Love at First Note,’ because that’s what I’m hoping for!”
What did the first date say when asked about their ideal vacation? “Anywhere with you would be the perfect destination!”
Why did the musician bring his guitar on his first date? He wanted to strum the chords of love and serenade his partner!
What did the clock say to the calendar on their first date? “I’m counting the moments until we meet again!”
Why did the scarecrow go on a first date? He was tired of being all straw and no play!
What did the grape say to the raisin on their first date? “You’re so wrinkled, I love it!”
Why did the baker go on a first date? He wanted to see if it was a recipe for love!
Why did the bee go on a first date? It heard there was a lot of buzz around their potential relationship!
Why did the first date bring a ladder to the restaurant? In case they wanted to take things to another level!
Why did the pencil go on a first date with the eraser? It wanted to make a good impression by rubbing out any mistakes!
Why did the computer go on a first date? It had an algorithm for finding love!
Why did the first date at the comedy club fail? They had different tastes in humor, and it was a joke gone wrong!
Why did the computer bring flowers to its first date? Because it wanted to RAM-ance her!
What did the clock say to the calendar on their first date? “I’m falling for you, let’s make some “time” for each other!”
Why did the gardener go on a first date? To find someone he could “grow” old with!
Why did the first date go to the seafood restaurant? Because they heard it was a plaice to meet someone!
What did the guy say to his date when she asked if he believes in love at first sight? “No, but I’m willing to give it a second date!”
Why did the comedian go on a first date? He wanted to make a good “impression”!
Why did the first date bring a telescope? Because they were hoping to see a future together, written among the stars!
Why did the first date at the sushi restaurant become a romantic affair? They were raw and honest with each other!
What did the first date say when asked about their favorite type of music? “I’m a big fan of falling in love!”
Why did the clock go on a first date? It wanted to make a “timely” impression on its potential partner!
What did the first date say when asked about their favorite ice cream flavor? “I like my dates sweet and a little bit nutty!”
Why did the couple go to the gym on their first date? They wanted to see if they had a strong connection and work out any potential relationship issues!
Why did the first date go to the bakery? Because they kneaded some dough to break the ice!
Why did the first date at the amusement park have a roller coaster of emotions? They were both on a thrill ride of excitement and nerves!
Why did the vampire take his date to the cemetery? Because he heard people dig love at first sight!
Why did the math teacher go on a first date? Because she was looking for someone to multiply her happiness!
Why did the first date go to the gym? Because they wanted to work out if they were a good fit!
Why did the first date at the bakery go so well? They both found each other very knead-y!
What did one hat say to the other hat on their first date? “You suit me perfectly!”
Why did the ghost take its date to the haunted house? It wanted to make sure they had a “spooky” good time!
Why was the first date at the seafood restaurant a disaster? The guy clam-ed up and the girl was a real shrimp!
Why did the couple go to the bakery on their first date? They wanted to see if they had enough chemistry to make some dough together!
What did the first date say when asked about their ideal partner? “Someone who can handle my terrible first date stories!”
Why did the bicycle go on a first date? It wanted to be tandem with someone special!
Why did the first date bring a magnet to the movie theater? They wanted to make sure there was a strong attraction between them!
Why did the first date bring a dictionary to the dinner? They wanted to make sure they had the right words for a great conversation!
Why did the guy bring a bunch of keys on his first date? He wanted to show her that she unlocked his heart!
Why did the first date bring a stopwatch to the coffee shop? Because they wanted to make every moment count!
Why did the bee go on a first date? Because it heard his date was a real honey!
Why did the computer go on a first date? It heard it could find its perfect “byte” match online!
Why did the pancake go on a first date? It just wanted to flip for someone special!
Why did the first date bring a map to the amusement park? Because they were lost in love!
What did the first date say after ordering a pizza? “I hope this is love at first slice!”
Why did the orange go on a first date? It wanted to squeeze the most out of the experience!
Why did the lemon go on a first date with the lime? They wanted to make some “citrus-ness” together!
Why did the candle go on a first date? It wanted to ignite a spark with its partner!

First Date Joke Generator

Navigating the humor on a first date can often feel like a tightrope walk.

(Can you relate?)

That’s where our FREE First Date Joke Generator comes to your rescue.

Developed to merge witty one-liners, lighthearted humor, and amusing anecdotes, it produces jokes that are sure to break the ice.

Don’t let your humor get as awkward as a silence-filled dinner.

Use our joke generator to create jokes that make your first date as memorable and delightful as possible.

FAQs About First Date Jokes

Why are first date jokes so popular?

First date jokes capture the awkwardness, excitement, and anticipation that comes with meeting someone new.

They help us laugh off our nerves and common missteps, making them incredibly relatable and universally appealing.

Can first date jokes help on an actual first date?

Absolutely!

First date jokes can serve as excellent ice-breakers, easing tension and showcasing your sense of humor.

They can also lighten the mood and create a fun, relaxed atmosphere.

How can I come up with my own first date jokes?

Think about common first date scenarios—nervousness, ordering food, awkward silences, etc.
First dates have a unique vocabulary associated with them (e.g., blind date, online dating, chemistry). Look for pun opportunities or interesting phrases involving these words.
Consider the setting or scenario of your joke. Is it a restaurant mishap? A funny misunderstanding? Tailor your humor to this context.
Take a well-known saying or phrase and give it a first date twist.
Play with puns and wordplay. First date jokes provide a great platform for some playful linguistics!

Are there any tips for remembering first date jokes?

Try to associate first date jokes with the situations where they might be useful—before a date, during the date, or when discussing dating with friends.

Linking jokes with these experiences can make them easier to remember.

How can I make my first date jokes better?

The key is in the delivery.

Make sure you’re comfortable with the joke, use the element of surprise, and don’t shy away from wordplay.

The more you share your jokes, the better you’ll get at understanding what gets the best reaction.

How does the First Date Joke Generator work?

Our First Date Joke Generator is your one-stop-shop for quick humor.

Simply input keywords related to your dating humor or situation and hit the Generate Jokes button.

In seconds, you’ll have a selection of witty, funny first date jokes to share.

Is the First Date Joke Generator free?

Yes, our First Date Joke Generator is completely free to use!

You can generate as many jokes as you want, ensuring your humor is always fresh and fun.

Start sharing laughs that are as exciting and unexpected as a first date itself!

Conclusion

First date jokes are a charming way to inject some humor into initially tense meetings, making each encounter a bit more enjoyable with each chuckle.

From the quick and witty to the drawn-out and hilarious, there’s a first date joke suitable for every scenario.

So next time you’re preparing for that all-important first date, remember, there’s comedy to be found in every awkward silence, shared interest, and even the occasional mishap.

Keep sharing the giggles, and let the good times flow naturally.

Because after all, a first date without laughter is like a candlelit dinner without wine—unthinkable and, frankly, a lot less fun.

Happy joking, everyone!

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