761 Meeting Jokes to Lighten Up Every Workplace Gathering

If you’re here, it means you’re ready to dive into the world of meeting jokes.

Not just any jokes, but the ones that truly stand out.

That’s why we’ve compiled a list of the most hilarious meeting-related jokes.

From office puns to witty one-liners, our collection has a joke for every corporate situation.

So, let’s delve into the amusing side of business meetings, one joke at a time.

Contents show

Meeting Jokes

Meeting jokes are the perfect antidote to the often monotonous and sometimes stressful corporate world.

They can lighten up the room and bring a much-needed smile to everyone’s face.

These jokes are not only about the meeting itself, but about the unique dynamics that come into play during such gatherings.

From the inevitable latecomer to the long-winded speaker, and even the overly enthusiastic participant, meetings provide ample fodder for humor.

Creating a memorable meeting joke involves a keen understanding of the corporate world, a sense of timing, and a dash of surprise.

Whether it’s poking fun at the confusing jargon, the seemingly endless presentation slides, or the struggle to find a meeting time everyone agrees on, there’s no shortage of material.

Ready to break the ice and bring some laughter into your next Zoom call or boardroom gathering?

Dive into these meeting jokes:

What do you call fake spaghetti? An impasta!
Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts!
What do you call a meeting of reindeer? A deer briefing!
Why did the stapler attend the meeting? It heard there would be binding decisions!
Why did the math teacher bring a ladder to the meeting? Because he heard the meeting was on a higher level!
Why did the smartphone skip the meeting? It didn’t want to face time!
Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants to the meeting? In case he got a hole in one!
What did the clock say to the watch at the meeting? “Don’t watch me, watch the time!”
Why couldn’t the leopard play hide and seek? Because he was always spotted!
Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field, just like the meeting organizer!
Why did the pencil skip the meeting? It didn’t want to get pointed out!
Why did the math teacher go to all the meetings? Because he wanted to make sure they all added up!
Why don’t skeletons ever attend meetings? They don’t have the guts!
Why did the pencil bring a chair to the meeting? Because it wanted to be a stationery object!
Why did the kangaroo bring a pillow to the meeting? Because he wanted to have a hopping good time!
Why did the calendar go to therapy after the meeting? It was overwhelmed by all the dates!
Why did the scarecrow go to the meeting? Because he wanted to have a bunch of straw-nomenal ideas!
Why did the paper clip feel lonely at the meeting? Because it couldn’t make any attachments!
What do you call a meeting of superhero sidekicks? A side-meeting!
Why did the meeting between the witch and the vampire go so well? They just clicked!
Why did the math book attend the meeting? It wanted to be a problem solver!
Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself? It was two-tired!
Why did the chair go to the meeting? It wanted to make sure everyone had a seat!
Why did the belt get arrested? It was holding up a pair of pants!
Why did the meeting between the fish and the bird fail? They couldn’t see eye to fin!
Why did the meeting between the pencil and the eraser get heated? Because they couldn’t erase their differences!
Why did the ghost attend the meeting? Because he wanted to show off his haunting presentation skills!
Why did the ghost attend the meeting? It wanted to make some boo-kkeeping changes!
Why did the chair attend the meeting? It wanted to be in the seat of power!
Why don’t some couples go to the gym? Because some relationships don’t work out!
Why did the chair always volunteer to take meeting notes? It wanted to support the meeting minutes!
Why did the ghost attend the meeting? To make a “spirited” contribution!
What did the chair say to the table at the meeting? “You’ve got my support!”
Why did the skeleton go to the meeting alone? Because he had no body to go with him!
Why did the broom attend the meeting? It wanted to sweep the competition away!
Why don’t oysters donate to charity? Because they are shellfish!
What did one wall say to the other wall during the meeting? “I’ll meet you at the corner!”
Why did the pencil go to the meeting alone? Because it couldn’t find a good “point” person!
Why did the computer go to the meeting? Because it wanted to have a byte with its colleagues!
Why did the plant go to the meeting? It wanted to branch out and grow its network!
Why did the meeting go to the gym? It wanted to work out its issues!
Why did the meeting between the hammer and the nail end quickly? They nailed it in record time!
Why did the light bulb go to the meeting? To brighten up the room with its ideas!
Why did the meeting between the calendar and the clock go so well? They both knew how to make time fly!
Why was the meeting between two mountains so important? Because it was a summit meeting!
Why did the coffee attend every meeting? It wanted to be a “mug-nificent” participant!
Why did the chef attend the meeting? Because he wanted to spice things up!
Why did the clock get in trouble at the meeting? It kept ticking off everyone!
Why did the pencil attend every meeting? Because it always wanted to get the point across!
Why did the pencil bring a pencil sharpener to the meeting? In case it needed to take some notes!
Why did the musician bring their instruments to the meeting? In case they had to “band” together!
Why did the ghost attend the meeting? Because it had some unfinished business!
Why did the computer go to the meeting? Because it had a lot of viruses and needed a “byte” of help!
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman!
Why did the ghost attend the meeting? Because he wanted to network with some spirits!
What did the ocean say to the beach? Nothing, it just waved!
Why did the meeting room feel cold? Because it had too many draft proposals!
Why did the clock feel nervous during the meeting? It knew it had to keep ticking off the seconds!
What did the pencil say to the eraser at the meeting? “You’re rubber and I’m graphite, let’s make mistakes together!”
Why did the clock go to the meeting? It didn’t want to be second-hand!
What do you call a meeting that is held in a cemetery? A grave matter!
Why did the plant feel out of place at the meeting? It was just a branch manager!
Why did the skeleton go to the meeting? To show off his bone-tastic ideas!
Why was the meeting between the scissors and the glue so awkward? They just couldn’t stick together!
Why did the coffee go to the meeting? Because it had bean summoned!
Why did the meeting between the pen and the paper get emotional? They had a lot of history together!
Why did the calendar skip the meeting? Because it didn’t have enough dates!
Why did the fruit basket get kicked out of the meeting? It couldn’t stop making inappropriate “pear” comments!
Why did the smartphone attend the meeting? Because it wanted to connect with its colleagues!
Why don’t eggs tell jokes? Because they might crack up!
Why did the chicken get a promotion after the meeting? Because it gave an “egg-cellent” presentation!
What do you call a meeting of zombie doctors? A dead-end conference!
Why did the meeting go to the bank? To exchange some currency for new ideas!
What did one chair say to the other chair at the meeting? “I’ll support you through this!”
Why did the kangaroo bring a parachute to the meeting? In case the conversation jumped too high!
Why did the grapefruit feel nervous at the meeting? It was afraid of being squeezed out!
Why did the pencil bring a blanket to the meeting? In case it got drawn out!
Why did the bicycle attend the meeting? Because it wanted to take notes and pedal ahead!
Why did the dog bring a notepad to the meeting? It wanted to take “paws” and jot down some notes!
Why did the meeting get a promotion? Because it met all the requirements!
Why did the scarecrow go to the meeting? Because he wanted to branch out and meet new friends!
Why did the clock feel frustrated during the meeting? It felt like time was ticking away!
Why did the rubber band refuse to go to the meeting? It didn’t want to be stretched too thin!

Short Meeting Jokes

Short meeting jokes are like the perfect office banter – quick, hilarious and a great icebreaker.

These jokes are perfect for email icebreakers, witty conversation starters, or even at the start of a meeting to lighten the mood.

The charm of short meeting jokes lies in their ability to bring laughter into a serious setting, injecting fun into just a few business words.

Ready to break the ice?

Here are some short meeting jokes that will bring a burst of laughter to your conference room in just a few words.

Why did the vampire skip the meeting? It couldn’t stomach the agenda!
What did the coffee say during the meeting? “I’m brewed-ing with excitement!”
Why did the meeting go so well? Because it was well-organized.
What do you call a meeting between three fish? A net-working event!
Why did the meeting get delayed? Because it couldn’t find a minute!
Why did the ghost attend the meeting? To exorcise its problems!
Why did the math teacher have a great meeting? She brought pi!
What did one meeting say to the other? Let’s get together!
Why did the pencil always ace the meetings? It always took notes!
Why was the broom late to the meeting? It overswept!
Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two tired!
Why did the scarecrow go to the meeting? To network and straw-mingle!
Why did the pencil bring paper to the meeting? For support!
Why did the broom go to the meeting? To sweep the competition!
Why did the meeting apologize? It needed to make amends-minute!
Why did the spider enjoy attending meetings? It loved the webinars!
Why did the pencil miss the meeting? It couldn’t draw a conclusion!
What did the boss say at the emergency meeting? “This is unproductive!”
Why don’t scientists trust stairs? Because they’re always up to something!
Why did the baseball bat miss the meeting? It had “bat” reception!
Why did the scarecrow go to the meeting? He needed a brain!
What did the computer say to the meeting? “I’m always on board!”
Why was the calendar always late to meetings? It took days off!
Why did the computer go to the meeting? To socialize its network!
Why did the scarecrow attend the meeting? He wanted to branch out!
Why did the grapefruit avoid the meeting? It was too sour!
Why did the scarecrow enjoy meetings? Because they were all ear!
How do you organize a space party? You planet!
Why did the meeting feel so long? It had too many minutes!
Why did the pencil skip the meeting? It couldn’t stay sharp!
Why did the computer attend the meeting? To improve its “byte” skills!
What’s a meeting’s favorite dance move? The conference shuffle!
What’s a vampire’s least favorite type of meeting? A stakeholder meeting!
Why did the scarecrow go to the meeting? To improve its straw-tagem!
Why did the skeleton miss the meeting? He couldn’t find the guts!
What did the clock say during the boring meeting? “I’m just ticking!” .
Why did the scarecrow attend the meeting? He heard it was “corny”!
Why did the car attend the meeting? It had important mileage-stones!
What’s a pirate’s favorite type of meeting? A board meeting!
What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear!
Why did the meeting go to the dentist? It needed a checkup!
What’s a vampire’s favorite kind of meeting? A blood drive!
Why did the chair leave the meeting? It couldn’t handle the pressure!
Why did the meeting go to the optometrist? For a better vision!
Why was the baker always late for meetings? He kneaded more time!
Why couldn’t the bicycle find its way home? It lost its bearings!
What do you call a meeting that’s full of animals? A zoo-nion!
Why did the banana attend the meeting? To peel good about itself!
Why did the bicycle fall over at the meeting? It was two-tired!
Why did the vegetable go to the meeting? To turnip the volume!
Why did the comedian always attend meetings? He loved the punch-lines!
Why did the scarecrow go to the meeting? To find some straw-mates!

Meeting Jokes One-Liners

Meeting jokes one-liners are the embodiment of humor condensed into a single, concise sentence.

They’re the spoken equivalent of navigating a meeting agenda with speed and precision – sharp, efficient, and impressively clever.

Creating a compelling meeting one-liner requires a mix of innovation, accuracy, and a deep understanding of the subtleties of humor.

The challenge lies in packaging the setup and punchline in a compact manner, delivering the maximum level of laughter with the least number of words.

May these meeting one-liners infuse your business gatherings with a dose of hilarity and lighten up the atmosphere:

I always arrive fashionably late to meetings, to make sure I miss all the important stuff.
My favorite meetings are the ones where we all pretend to listen, but secretly plan our grocery lists in our heads.
I accidentally joined a virtual meeting with my camera off and spent the whole time frantically waving at my computer screen.
I’m sorry, I can’t attend the meeting, I have to wash my cat’s hair.
I’m sorry I’m late for the meeting, but I had to stop and buy snacks for everyone.
I attended a meeting on time once, it was a total fluke and no one believed it happened.
I tried to make a joke at a meeting, but it didn’t land well. Apparently, my punchline was on mute.
My boss asked me how I handle awkward moments in meetings. I replied, “I just leave the room.”
I showed up to a meeting in my pajamas once, just to see if anyone would notice.
I’m convinced that meetings were invented as a form of punishment for people who are too efficient at getting work done.
If you want to kill time, attend a meeting. If you want to kill productivity, schedule a meeting.
At meetings, I like to subtly slide my pen off the table and watch everyone’s reaction like it’s a social experiment.
If I had a dollar for every unproductive meeting I’ve attended, I could retire and never attend another meeting again.
I accidentally brought my cat to the meeting, but he kept purr-suing his own agenda.
Why did the robot go to the meeting? To meet his circuit friends, of course!
I tried to organize a meeting for people with procrastination issues, but no one showed up.
My boss called a meeting to discuss our communication issues, but he never showed up… typical.
Why do we call it a “meeting room” when nothing ever gets accomplished in there?
In meetings, I often wonder if “Let’s circle back to that later” is just another way of saying “Let’s never talk about it again”
I always arrive fashionably late to meetings, so I can make a grand entrance… and blame traffic.
I’m so good at pretending to pay attention in meetings that I should win an Oscar for Best Actor in a Boring Role.
I once fell asleep in a meeting and when I woke up, everyone was clapping. Turns out they thought I was just really engaged in the discussion.
I’m convinced that the main purpose of a meeting is to create more meetings.
I tried to make a meeting pun, but everyone kept interrupting me. It was a real “meeting” of the minds.
I once attended a meeting that started with “Let’s keep this brief” and ended four hours later with “I guess that’s it for today, see you all next week!”
I had a meeting with my alarm clock this morning, and we both agreed it’s too loud.
Meetings: the perfect place to practice your poker face while suppressing your urge to scream.
I told my boss I couldn’t make it to the meeting because I was experiencing “time-zone confusion.” In reality, I was just catching up on sleep.
The only thing more pointless than a meeting is being invited to a meeting about the upcoming meeting.
Why did the scarecrow love meetings? Because they were always stuffed with great ideas!
I joined a club for procrastinators. We haven’t had a meeting yet.
The key to a successful meeting is having a good supply of snacks to keep everyone awake.
I accidentally walked into a meeting and now I’m the new CEO.
I went to a meeting about time management, but it took forever.
If I had a dollar for every pointless meeting I’ve attended, I’d have enough money to start my own pointless meeting company.
I’m convinced that “meeting” is just a fancy word for “group nap time.”
I asked if we could have a meeting at the beach, but it was deemed too sandy.
I’m sorry, I can’t attend the meeting. I have a date with my couch and Netflix.
I used to be a people person, but meetings have turned me into more of a “please leave me alone” person.
At meetings, the best time to speak up is when someone asks if anyone has any questions, because that’s when no one is actually listening.
Why did the coffee cup go to the meeting? To get a “mug” shot with the team!
I don’t always attend meetings, but when I do, I bring a pillow.
The length of a meeting is inversely proportional to the amount of actual work that gets done.
I have a rare condition where I can never remember anyone’s name at a meeting, but I can recite all the lyrics to “Baby Shark”
I brought a pillow to the meeting, just in case it turned out to be a snooze fest.
I’m convinced that meetings were invented to punish us for having free time.
Why did the math teacher go to so many meetings? Because they needed to solve for X, Y, and Z!
The key to a successful meeting is to bring donuts, lots of donuts.
I once fell asleep in a meeting and when I woke up, everyone else had left and the office was locked.
At the meeting, I always bring my own snacks because nothing gets the creative juices flowing like a bag of chips.
Why did the meeting go to the zoo? To find some new ice breakers.
Why do we call them “meetings” when half the time is spent on “un-meeting” – discussing things that could have been resolved through email?
I’m so good at pretending to pay attention in meetings, I should get an Oscar.
I once attended a meeting that was so boring, I started taking attendance for the ants crawling on the table.
I finally realized why meetings are called meetings – because they never seem to end!
I attended a meeting about procrastination, but it got rescheduled… for tomorrow.
I was going to tell a time-traveling joke at the meeting, but you guys didn’t like it yet.
Some people have a talent for speaking in meetings, while others have a talent for pretending to listen in meetings.
I had a meeting with my boss, and he asked if I had any questions. I replied, “Yes, when is lunch?”
Why did the meeting go to the gym? To work on its board exercises.
I told my boss I couldn’t make it to the meeting because I was feeling “under the weather.” Turns out, my excuse was too literal, as I got trapped in an elevator during a thunderstorm.
I attended a meeting about time management, but it lasted so long that I lost track of time completely.
The best part of a meeting is when it’s finally over.
If there was an Olympic sport for extending meetings, I would definitely win the gold medal.
I always bring a pen to meetings because I’m a big fan of doodling.
I asked the librarian if they had any books on paranoia, she whispered, “They’re right behind you” at the meeting.
I love how meetings are scheduled for an hour but somehow manage to last a lifetime.
Why is it called a “meeting” when nothing is ever really “met”?
I joined a meeting about productivity, but we spent the first hour deciding what the official meeting snack should be.
I suggested we have a meeting at the gym, but it was voted down. Apparently, it didn’t meet everyone’s fitness requirements.
Meetings: where minutes are taken and hours are wasted.
I couldn’t attend the meeting because I was busy perfecting my ‘looking interested’ face in the mirror.
I told my coworker I had a “meeting with destiny,” but it turns out they were just scheduling a conference call.
My favorite part of meetings is when someone starts a sentence with, “I don’t want to sound rude, but…”
I went to a meeting on time once, and now my colleagues are convinced I’m a shape-shifting alien with the ability to manipulate time and space.
I went to a meeting about time management, but it went on for hours – talk about irony!
I never make the same mistake twice. I make it five or six times, just to be sure.
The word “meeting” can be easily replaced with “pointless time-wasting exercise.”
I used to have a fear of meetings, but now I just have a meeting of fears.
The true test of patience is sitting through a meeting that could have been resolved with a simple email.
At meetings, I always bring a pen and a notebook, but I never use them. It’s a good way to look productive though.
I’m starting a support group for people who have a meeting phobia, but I can’t seem to get anyone to show up.
If you want to know the value of a minute, try asking someone who’s in a meeting.
I’m not late for the meeting; I just walked in fashionably early for the next one.
I always bring snacks to a meeting, just in case it turns into a hunger strike.
The best part of a meeting is when it ends and you get to leave with the satisfaction of accomplishing absolutely nothing.
I strategically sit near the exit at meetings, just in case they decide to make it a surprise escape room challenge.
At meetings, I like to play a game called ‘How long can I keep a straight face?’ It’s challenging.
I attended a meeting on the importance of punctuality, but the speaker arrived 30 minutes late.
Why did the computer attend the meeting? To show its support for “byte”-sized conversations!
I walked into a meeting and asked if it was a “mandatory voluntary” gathering. The confused looks were priceless.
I went to a meeting for people who hate meetings, but it only made me hate them more.
Why did the meeting bring a ladder? To help reach a resolution.
I told my coworkers I have a photographic memory, but it turns out it’s just all the screenshots I take during meetings.
The only thing more predictable than the agenda of a meeting is the moment when someone suggests having another meeting to discuss the first meeting.
My favorite part of meetings is when someone says “let’s wrap this up” and I can finally go back to my desk and nap.
I love meetings, especially when they’re canceled.
At a meeting, everyone talks, nobody listens, and everyone disagrees later on email.
I attend meetings just to see if anyone will notice that I’m wearing two different socks.
My favorite part of a meeting is when someone tries to pass off their lack of preparation as a “surprise presentation”
In a meeting, the only thing getting worked on is the agenda for the next meeting.
Why have a short meeting when you can have a long meeting and pretend to be busy for the entire day?
I thought my webcam was off during the meeting, but apparently, my epic air guitar solo was enjoyed by all.
The meeting could have been an email, but then we wouldn’t have all this awkward silence and uncomfortable eye contact.
I attended a meeting on decision-making, but we couldn’t agree on a date for the next meeting.
If you want to know the true meaning of boredom, attend a meeting about meetings.
The only thing more contagious than a yawn in a meeting is the urge to check your phone.
I asked my boss if I could leave the meeting early because of a headache. He said I could, but I have to take it with me.
At a meeting, my colleague said they had a “big announcement.” Turns out they were just talking about lunch.
Why did the meeting go to therapy? It had trouble expressing its feelings.
Why did the meeting bring a map? Because it wanted to stay on topic and not get sidetracked.
I’m so bad at remembering names that I once introduced myself to the same person three times in a meeting.
I was going to tell you a joke about meetings, but I had a meeting and it wasn’t very funny.
My idea of a productive meeting is when the coffee is strong enough to jumpstart my brain into generating great excuses for leaving early.
If time is money, then meetings are the ultimate currency exchange – you waste one to earn nothing.
I showed up to the meeting fashionably late, but they were already discussing my tardiness.
Meetings: the art of speaking without saying anything at all.
My boss told me to have a good day, so I went home early from the meeting.
I went to a meeting about time travel yesterday. I’ll let you know how it goes.
The only thing more painful than a long, boring meeting is realizing you have to attend another one right after it.
Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything, including meetings.
My boss yelled at me during the meeting for not paying attention. I wasn’t even there!
I thought I was being clever by drawing a stick figure on my meeting agenda, until I realized it was actually a flowchart for world domination.
I’m convinced that the only productive thing that happens in meetings is when someone brings donuts.
I’m convinced that the purpose of meetings is to take the work out of the day and replace it with talking about the work we should be doing.
I went to a meeting for those struggling with overthinking, but we never reached a decision.
The best part of a meeting is when it ends and you can finally escape.
I’m pretty sure the only reason meetings were invented was to make us appreciate our lunch breaks.
I’ve mastered the art of looking engaged in a meeting while mentally planning my next vacation.
I always bring a pen and paper to meetings, not to take notes, but to doodle intricate designs that vaguely resemble paying attention.
At a meeting, my boss said, “This is the most important meeting of the year.” I replied, “Oh, so it’s the last one, right?”
I don’t always remember what was discussed in a meeting, but I always remember the snacks that were served.
My favorite part of a meeting is when I imagine what would happen if I suddenly yelled “Pineapple!”
I attended a meeting about meetings, and it was the most productive meeting I’ve ever had – because it ended quickly!
I thought I was attending a conference, but it turns out it’s just a group of people waiting for the coffee to be ready.
The best part about meetings is when they finally end and you can go back to doing actual work.
I always feel like a detective in a meeting, trying to uncover the hidden agenda behind every statement.
I have a PhD in daydreaming during meetings.
I attended a meeting about procrastination, but it got postponed… multiple times.
I tried to make the meeting more exciting by bringing a piñata, but everyone just stared at me awkwardly.
The only thing more boring than a meeting is watching paint dry in a meeting room.
I’ve never met a meeting that couldn’t have been an email.
I have a habit of doodling during meetings, but my drawings are so bad that my colleagues think I’m taking notes in a foreign language.
Did you hear about the mathematician who got lost in a meeting? He took a tangent and never returned.
A meeting is just an event where minutes are taken and hours are wasted.
If you want to make a meeting more exciting, just announce that there will be free donuts.
My favorite part of the meeting is when it ends.
Why did the calendar bring a pencil to the meeting? In case it needed to make a date change.
I had a meeting with my sofa today, and we both agreed on staying in bed all day.
The secret to a successful meeting is to schedule it at a time when everyone is too tired to argue.
At the meeting, I asked for everyone’s attention, but all I got were blank stares and a few phone notifications.
I showed up to a meeting with two different shoes on, and nobody noticed. Talk about a sole-ful moment!
I’m always fashionably late to meetings. Fashionably as in, I dress terribly.
I organized a meeting for introverts, but nobody showed up.
I asked the invisible man if he could attend the meeting, but he didn’t see the point.
Why do meetings take place in a room with no windows? Because otherwise, people might try to jump out.
I tried to liven up a boring meeting by bringing a clown, but it turns out everyone was already clowning around.
The best part of a meeting is when someone asks a question you don’t know the answer to, and you can just nod and say, “Let’s circle back to that later.”
I can’t take my dog to the meeting because he’s a Pomeranian.
My boss scheduled a meeting to discuss meetings. I’m still recovering from the irony overload.
I tried to make a joke during the meeting, but it didn’t land well. Guess I need a better delivery.
I accidentally brought a ladder to the meeting, but it was a step up from my usual contributions.
I love attending meetings, especially when they provide free snacks to keep us from falling asleep.
Why have a meeting when you can just send a passive-aggressive email?
My secret meeting strategy: bring a notepad and doodle to look busy, even if I have no idea what’s going on.
I hate it when people at meetings say “let’s take a step back” because I’m always in the front row.
I always bring a pen and notebook to meetings, just so people think I’m taking notes.
Why did the calendar skip the meeting? It heard it was a “date” and got confused!
Why have a meeting when you can send an email and pretend to be busy?
I always get a little too excited when someone suggests having a meeting in the conference room, because it means I can finally use the fancy whiteboard markers.
I always bring a pillow to meetings, not for comfort but to hide my laughter when someone says something ridiculous.
I tried to make a PowerPoint presentation for the meeting, but accidentally created a meme slideshow instead.
I’m not late, I’m just on my own unique timezone called “fashionably late.”
I’m sorry, I can’t attend the meeting. I’m busy pretending to be productive elsewhere.
I joined a support group for people who are addicted to meetings, but it turns out they never actually meet.
The only thing worse than a meeting that could have been an email is a meeting that could have been a text message.
My boss said the meeting would be quick, but I didn’t realize quick meant three hours of PowerPoint presentations.
At my last meeting, I suggested we have a stand-up meeting, but my boss misunderstood and thought I meant a comedy show.
The meeting was so long, I considered starting a family in the conference room.
Why did the scarecrow refuse to attend the meeting? He heard it was a bunch of straw-nge individuals.
The meeting was so boring, even the clock hands fell asleep.
The meeting was so boring that even the clock couldn’t stay awake and fell off the wall.
Why did the meeting bring a comedian? To keep the attendees laughing and awake.
I don’t always attend meetings, but when I do, I show up five minutes before they end.
I love meetings so much that I schedule meetings about meetings to discuss how to make meetings more efficient.
I tried to make a joke at a business meeting, but it went over everyone’s head. Turns out, I was in the wrong department.
I’m not sure what’s more boring, the meeting or the PowerPoint presentation about the meeting.
I keep a secret stash of snacks in my bag during meetings, just in case the agenda gets too dry to handle.
I attended a virtual meeting today and accidentally turned on the cat filter. Needless to say, everyone took me seriously.
The problem with meetings is that they’re just too meetingful.
The best way to end a meeting is to say, “Let’s circle back to this next week.” Spoiler: We never actually circle back.
I have a secret talent for making eye contact with the person who’s speaking in a meeting, but only when they’re saying something completely irrelevant.
I have a Ph.D. in doodling during meetings, it’s a form of art that helps me maintain my sanity.
I joined a meeting for people who are bad at math, but the attendance was a fraction of what was expected.
I suggested a meeting for people with short attention spans, but no one could stay focused long enough to schedule it.
I used to be afraid of public speaking, but then I realized that everyone at a meeting is too busy worrying about themselves to listen to me anyway.
I’m sorry I’m late, I didn’t want to come.
I attended a meeting about time management, but it lasted way longer than expected. Talk about irony!
I proposed a great idea at the meeting, but it got lost among the sea of blank stares and stifled yawns.
The only meeting I enjoy attending is the meeting of my bed and pillow at the end of the day.
I attend so many meetings that I’m considering adding “Professional Meeting Attendee” to my resume.
I always bring a notepad to meetings, not because I take notes, but because it gives me something to doodle on while pretending to listen.
I’m not saying I hate meetings, but I’d rather be in line at the DMV.
I always bring my phone to a meeting so I can look busy when I’m not paying attention.
I went to a meeting about anti-gravity, but it had no ups and downs.
I’m not saying my boss talks a lot in meetings, but he once had a conference call with a fax machine.
I attended a meeting for procrastinators, but it was postponed indefinitely.
In meetings, the person who speaks the loudest is usually the one who has no idea what they’re talking about.
I went to a meeting on time, but apparently, my enthusiasm was 30 minutes early.
I tried to make a joke at a meeting, but it didn’t land well. I guess you could say it was a meeting failure.
Why did the chair go to the meeting? It wanted to sit in on the discussion!
I had a meeting with my mirror, and we both agreed that Zoom calls need better lighting.
Why did the tree apologize during the meeting? Because it “wood”n’t stop making “bark”-ward comments!
At the meeting, I asked my boss if I could leave early and he said “Yes, but don’t ever come back!”
I tried to make a joke at the meeting, but it seems my sense of humor was not included in the agenda.

Meeting Dad Jokes

Meeting dad jokes are the quintessential mix of light humor and professional jargon that can make even the most monotonous meetings entertaining.

They’re the type of jokes that are so corny, they’re amusing.

These jokes are ideal for breaking the ice at business meetings, lightening the mood during a serious discussion, or just to inject a little fun into the workday.

Prepare for the awkward chuckles and grins.

Here are some meeting dad jokes that are bound to liven up your next work gathering:

What do you call a meeting that only lasts a minute? A meeting min-ute!
Why did the math teacher go to the meeting? Because he wanted to solve some problems together!
Why did the eraser go to the meeting? Because it wanted to make sure everyone’s mistakes were corrected.
Why did the meeting turn into a vegetable garden? Because there were too many “beets” in attendance!
Why did the pen feel nervous at the meeting? Because it always felt like it was being watched!
Why did the computer go to the meeting? Because it wanted to network…and avoid getting a virus!
Why did the tree apologize during the meeting? Because it didn’t mean to be sappy!
Why did the math teacher attend the meeting? Because it was a sum-mit.
Why did the calendar bring a knife to the meeting? Because it wanted to cut some dates!
Why did the clock go to the meeting? Because it was always “watching” the time.
Why do meetings always start late? Because the attendees can never find a good time to schedule them!
Why do meetings always start late? Because the chairs need time to get their act together!
Why did the pencil attend the meeting? Because it wanted to sharpen its communication skills!
Why did the computer go to the meeting? Because it wanted to “meet” its deadline.
Why did the scarecrow attend the meeting? Because he wanted to learn how to become outstanding in his field!
What did the stapler say at the end of the meeting? “I’m attached to this team!”
Why did the paper clip get promoted after the meeting? Because it always held things together!
Why did the wall clock get kicked out of the meeting? Because it was ticking everyone off!
Why did the meeting room always have a lot of plants? Because they wanted to create a great “meeting” atmosphere!
Why did the chair always attend meetings? Because it wanted to support the participants.
Why did the skeleton go to the meeting? Because he had a bone to pick with his coworkers!
Why did the computer go to the meeting? To hear the Windows of opportunity!
Why did the meeting of the mops always result in disagreement? They could never get on the same sweep!
Why did the stapler go to the meeting? Because it wanted to keep everything together.
Why did the pencil go to the meeting? To get the “write” kind of connection!
Why did the meeting between the clock and calendar never work out? Because they had different timescales!
Why did the meeting take a nap? Because it needed a “power” snooze!
Why did the chair apologize during the meeting? Because it couldn’t keep its legs together!
What do you call a group of musical meeting participants? A chord-ination.
Why did the pencil bring a notepad to the meeting? It wanted to jot down all the important points!
Why did the clock go to the meeting? Because it knew how to make the most of every second!
Why did the light bulb attend every meeting? It wanted to shine bright and share its ideas!
Why did the computer go to the meeting? Because it had some “byte”-ing issues to discuss!
Why did the meeting participants bring extra chairs? In case there were any chair-itable guests.
Why did the chair refuse to speak up during the meeting? Because it didn’t want to make a stand!
What did the chair say to the table at the meeting? “I’m always here to support you!”
Why did the meeting room get so hot? Because all the minutes were taking notes!
Why did the meeting get a standing ovation? Because it finally reached a conclusion!
Why did the chicken join the meeting? To prove it wasn’t a chicken anymore.
Why did the meeting go so well? Because it had excellent “minutes” of preparation!
Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything… even the meeting agenda!
Why was the calendar so good at leading the meeting? Because it had great dates!
Why did the meeting feel like a circus? Because it had a lot of “jugglers” trying to balance multiple tasks!
Why did the meeting apologize for being so boring? It said it needed to “meet” everyone’s expectations!
Why did the clock go to the meeting? It wanted to learn how to “tick” better.
Why did the chair become the leader of the meeting? Because it had great support!
Why did the light bulb feel left out at the meeting? Because it wasn’t the brightest idea!
Why did the pen feel nervous during the meeting? Because it knew its days were numbered!
Why did the meeting run late? Because it couldn’t find its PowerPoint!
Why did the meeting always start late? Because the clock was always running a few minutes behind!
Why did the meeting room get in trouble? Because it couldn’t stop talking during the presentation!
Why did the meeting always take place in the bakery? Because it kneaded some dough-cumentation!
Why did the calendar always attend meetings? Because it liked to stay on top of things!
Why did the vampire always attend meetings? Because he wanted to sink his teeth into the agenda!
What do you call a meeting that never starts on time? A procrastination conference!
Why did the door get invited to the meeting? Because it always opens up opportunities.
Why did the chair apologize during the meeting? Because it couldn’t stand the pressure!
Why did the math teacher attend all the meetings? Because he had a lot of problems to solve!
Why did the comedian attend the meeting? Because they wanted to “break the ice” with some jokes!
Why did the meeting run out of chairs? Because everyone wanted a seat at the table.
Why was the meeting room always full of laughter? Because it had great “puns” for everyone!
Why was the calendar always so tired after a meeting? Because it had too many dates to keep track of!
Why did the chair feel left out during the meeting? Because everyone else had a “seat” at the table!
Why did the door feel comfortable at the meeting? It liked being in its own frame of mind!
Why did the calendar go to therapy? Because it had too many meetings and couldn’t handle the dates!
Why did the scarecrow have a meeting? Because he needed to discuss the corn-sequences.
Why did the calendar go to therapy? Because it felt days were just meeting.
Why did the scarecrow go to the meeting? Because he wanted to make some new friends in the field.
Why did the meeting room smell so bad? Because it had too many “pew”-ple in it!
Why did the pencil go to the meeting? Because it wanted to take meeting notes…lead them to success!
Why did the pencil refuse to attend the meeting? It didn’t want to be “lead” astray!
Why was the math book always late for the meeting? Because it had too many problems to solve!
Why did the pencil attend the meeting? Because it wanted to be the “write” hand man!
Why did the desk feel left out at the meeting? Because it wasn’t getting any attention from the chairpersons!
Why do meetings always go well? Because they have a great “agenda”!
Why did the thief skip the meeting? He didn’t want to be caught red-handed!
Why did the chicken get a standing ovation at the meeting? Because it cracked a good yolk!
Why did the meeting between the pencil and paper end abruptly? They couldn’t draw a conclusion!
What do you call a meeting that’s held in the sky? A high-level summit!
Why did the meeting between the pen and eraser take forever? They kept making mistakes and having to start over!
Why do meetings take place in the morning? So everyone can feel like they’re being productive before lunch!
Why did the computer enjoy the meeting? It had a great connection with everyone!
Why did the coffee go to the meeting? It heard it could perk up the conversation!
Why did the clock feel bored during the meeting? Because it just couldn’t keep its hands to itself!
Why was the computer cold at the meeting? Because it left its Windows open!
Why did the skeleton attend the meeting? To put some backbone into the discussion!
Why did the meeting go to the eye doctor? Because it needed better focus!
Why did the chair join the meeting? It wanted to “seat” everyone comfortably!
Why did the scarecrow get promoted? Because he was outstanding in his field, especially during meetings!
Why did the clock get scolded at the meeting? It was always running late!
Why do meetings always go by so quickly? Because they have a lot of “minutes”!
Why did the tomato turn red during the meeting? Because it saw the “ketchup” with what was being discussed!
Why did the meeting get interrupted by a mosquito? Because it wanted to bug everyone with its presence!
Why did the chair enjoy attending meetings? Because it loved being a “supportive” presence!
Why did the banker bring a ladder to the meeting? Because he heard the stakes were high!
Why did the pencil bring a suitcase to the meeting? Because it wanted to make a good point!
What did the grape say at the business meeting? “I’m ready to wine and dine!”
Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything, just like people in a meeting!
Why did the meeting always go to the bakery? Because it kneaded some fresh ideas!
What do you call a meeting that’s full of secret agents? A classified assembly!
Why did the math teacher always excel in meetings? Because she knew how to sum up the situation!
Why did the tree attend every meeting? Because it wanted to branch out and connect with others!
Why did the chair apologize at the meeting? It felt a bit seatious about its behavior!
Why did the paper go to the meeting? Because it wanted to be sheeted with important information!
Why did the meeting end early? Because it couldn’t find a good “agenda”!
Why did the pen feel nervous at the meeting? Because it didn’t know how to “ink” of any good ideas!
Why did the chair get invited to the meeting? Because it had a seat at the table!
Why did the smartphone attend the meeting? It heard there would be a lot of “cell”-ebrity guests!
Why did the math book go to the meeting? To solve problems and show its work!
What do you call a meeting with lots of bald people? A chrome summit.
Why did the clock always arrive early to meetings? It liked to make a timely entrance!
What do you call a meeting that’s full of only people named Bob? A Bobsled.
Why did the calendar refuse to go to the meeting? Because it already had too many dates scheduled.
Why do meetings always go so quickly? Because they have great “minute”takers!
What did the coffee say to the tea during their meeting? Let’s brew up some good ideas!
Why did the scarecrow enjoy his job? Because he loved meeting new people!
Why did the basketball player bring a ladder to the meeting? Because he wanted to “shoot” for the stars.
Why did the coffee go to all the meetings? It wanted to espresso its opinions!
Why did the clock get in trouble at the meeting? Because it couldn’t keep its hands to itself!
Why did the calendar go to the meeting? Because it wanted to “schedule” some quality time with others!
Why did the computer go to the meeting? Because it wanted to click with the new team members!
Why did the meeting have a lot of food? Because it was catered to all the attendees!
Why did the math book always go to meetings? Because it had a lot of problems to solve!
Why did the meeting between the pen and paper have a rocky start? They couldn’t find common stationery!
Why was the calendar so popular at the meeting? Because it had a lot of dates!
Why did the calendar refuse to attend the meeting? It said, “I’m booked for the day!”

Meeting Jokes for Kids

Meeting jokes for kids are the equivalent of a fun-filled classroom session—engaging, entertaining, and always a big hit with the younger audience.

These jokes prompt children to discover the amusing side of formal situations, helping them understand the concept of humor in a light-hearted manner, and encouraging them to appreciate the funny side of everyday life.

Additionally, meeting jokes for kids can also serve as ice breakers, easing their way into social interactions and teaching them to tackle nervousness with laughter.

Ready for a humor-filled boardroom session?

Here are the jokes that’ll have your kids chuckling at the thought of their next class meeting:

What did the pencil say to the eraser at the meeting? “You’re rubbing me the wrong way!”
Why did the teacher have a meeting with the calendar? To plan their days together!
What did the teacher say to the noisy pencil during the meeting? “You need to lead a quieter life!”
Why did the cookie go to the meeting? Because it wanted to crumble under the pressure!
What did the grape say at the meeting? “Let’s all raisin our glasses and have a fruitful discussion!”
Why did the lion roar during the meeting? Because it wanted to be the main speaker!
What do you call a meeting between a lion and a zebra? A carnivore conference!
Why did the clock go to the meeting? Because it wanted to make sure everyone was on time!
Why did the eraser enjoy the meeting? It loved rubbing shoulders with new thoughts!
What do you call a meeting of hammers? A toolbox convention.
Why did the volleyball player bring a pencil to the meeting? So she could spike it!
What do you call a meeting of fireworks? A spark-tacular gathering!
Why did the bee go to the meeting? To buzz-iness with its friends!
What did the clock say to the calendar at the meeting? Let’s make some time for a collaboration!
Why did the sun go to the meeting? Because it wanted to shine in front of everyone!
What did the chair say to the table during the meeting? “I’ve got your back!”
Why did the pencil refuse to go to the meeting? It didn’t want to get the point!
Why did the banana go to the meeting? It wanted to learn how to “peel” more confident!
Why did the bear bring a ladder to the meeting? Because it didn’t want to be the “low bear” on the totem pole!
What do you call a meeting between a tiger and a cheetah? A fast encounter!
Why did the chicken go to the meeting? To talk about its egg-cellent ideas!
Why did the clock always arrive late to the meetings? Because it took time to tick.
Why did the scarecrow go to the meeting? Because he wanted to see how many people he could scare!
What did one door say to the other door at the meeting? I’m always open for new opportunities!
Why was the pencil late to the meeting? It couldn’t get the point!
What do you call a meeting between two rivers? A water conference!
Why did the soccer ball go to the meeting? It wanted to kick-start some discussions!
What did the teacher say to the students at the meeting? Let’s make it a meeting of the minds!
What did the pen say to the paper during the meeting? “Let’s make a note of it!”
Why did the sandwich go to the meeting? It wanted to meat new friends!
Why did the light bulb feel left out during the meeting? It wasn’t very bright!
What did one chair say to the other chair during the meeting? “I feel so seat-tisfied!”
Why did the dolphin attend the meeting? Because it wanted to make a splash with its ideas!
What do you call a meeting between two oceans? A sea-cret gathering!
Why did the chair feel out of place at the meeting? It couldn’t find its table-mates!
Why did the cupcake always get invited to the meetings? Because it was so sweet and had great frosting ideas!
Why did the ghost go to the meeting? Because it wanted to make some boo-tiful friends!
What did the pencil say to the paper at the meeting? Let’s draw some attention!
Why did the banana feel awkward at the meeting? It slipped on a peel of silence!
What do you call a meeting between a kangaroo and a rabbit? A hopping get-together!
What do you call a meeting between a snowman and a vampire? Frostbite!
What did the calendar say to the pencil during the meeting? “I’ll see you later!”
What do you call a meeting between two spies? A covert operation!
Why did the book go to the meeting? Because it wanted to “cover” all the details!
What do you call a meeting between a shark and a fish? A “fin-terview”!
Why did the teddy bear bring a pillow to the meeting? Just in case there were any bear-y important discussions!
What did one cloud say to the other cloud at the meeting? Let’s make it rain!
Why did the door attend the meeting? It wanted to hear the latest knock-knock jokes!
Why did the dog cancel his meeting? He had a “paws”-itive appointment with the groomer!
Why did the crayons have a great time at the meeting? They brought all the colorful ideas!
Why did the chair get elected as the meeting leader? Because it had good “support”!
Why did the pencil bring a eraser to the meeting? In case it made any mistakes!
What do you call a meeting between two sandwiches? A sub-committee!
Why did the clock attend the meeting? To keep everyone on track!
Why did the computer go to the meeting? To meet its “mouse” friends!
Why did the chair feel uncomfortable during the meeting? It had too many legs on its mind!
Why did the clock go to the meeting? It didn’t want to miss out on any “minute” of fun!
Why did the banana go to the meeting? Because it wanted to “appeal” to everyone’s taste!
What did one chair say to the other chair at the meeting? Let’s sit together and make a stand!
Why did the eraser feel nervous during the meeting? It was afraid of making mistakes!
Why did the computer go to the meeting? Because it wanted to “byte” into some new ideas!
Why did the scarecrow go to the meeting? Because it wanted to improve its “brrrrrrainstorming” skills!
Why did the clock feel like it was always late to the meetings? Because it couldn’t keep its hands to itself!
Why did the bear go to the meeting? To bear his thoughts and ideas!
Why did the clock attend the meeting? Because it wanted to “face” the important decision!
Why did the banana bring sunglasses to the meeting? Because it wanted to “peel” important!
Why did the paper go to the meeting? Because it heard there was going to be a tearjerker.
What did one chair say to the other chair at the meeting? “Let’s make this sit-uation more comfortable!”
Why did the clock go to the meeting? It wanted to “hand” out with the other clocks!
What’s a monster’s favorite kind of meeting? A beast conference!
Why did the pencil bring a friend to the meeting? Just in case it needed to draw a conclusion!
Why did the clock go to the meeting? To learn how to tick-tock properly!
Why was the math test nervous at the meeting? It was afraid of getting squared!
Why did the computer go to the meeting? To become more social-media-savvy!
Why did the paper clip go to the meeting? To keep things together and bind new relationships!
What did one pen say to the other pen during the meeting? “We make a great point together!”
What’s a meeting’s favorite snack? Meeting balls!
Why did the computer feel sleepy during the meeting? It had too many zzz-attachments!
Why did the telephone go to the meeting? To have a “conference” call!
Why did the broom go to the meeting? It wanted to sweep everyone off their feet with jokes!
Why did the banana go to the meeting? Because it wanted to “peel” the tension in the room!
Why did the clock go to the meeting? Because it wanted to have a hands-on experience!
What did the boss say to the employees during the meeting? “We need to talk, lettuce accomplish our goals!”
Why did the teddy bear bring a pillow to the meeting? Because it wanted to have a “bear-y” comfortable time!
Why did the pencil go to the meeting? Because it wanted to be the “write” person for the job!
Why did the bee go to the meeting? It wanted to “buzz” in on the fun!
Why did the clock attend the meeting? It wanted to learn how to keep its hands to itself!
What do you call a meeting between a pencil and a notebook? A stationery gathering!
Why did the chair go to the meeting? Because it wanted to be a part of the seating arrangement!
Why did the cookie feel nervous at the meeting? Because it was feeling crumby!
What do you call a meeting between a cat and a dog? A “pawsitive” discussion!
Why did the duck bring a feather to the meeting? To take notes in quack-tion!
Why did the clock get yelled at during the meeting? Because it was ticked off!
What did one chair say to the other chair at the meeting? “I feel a bit seat-ious!”
Why did the bicycle attend the meeting? Because it wanted to wheel-y make a good impression!
Why did the computer go to the meeting? To have a byte with the other computers!
What did the pen say to the paper at the meeting? “Let’s make some notes together!”
Why was the math book excited about the meeting? Because it heard there would be lots of problems to solve!
Why did the coffee go to the meeting? Because it heard it was a “grounds” for discussion.
Why did the teacher bring a ladder to the meeting? To reach the highest level of discussion!
Why did the teacher bring a ladder to the meeting? Because she wanted to “rise” to the occasion!
What did the chair say to the table during the meeting? Let’s get together and take a seat!
Why did the light bulb attend the meeting? To brighten everyone’s ideas!

Meeting Jokes for Adults

Who says business meetings have to be all about graphs, figures, and serious discussions?

Meeting jokes for adults provide a dose of humor, stimulating the intellect with a hint of playful mischief.

Much like a well-organized meeting agenda, these jokes incorporate elements of wit, intelligence, and a sprinkle of cheekiness to elevate the mood.

Perfect for breaking the ice at corporate get-togethers, networking events, or simply to lighten the atmosphere during a high-pressure boardroom discussion, these jokes are a surefire way to incite laughter.

So, brace yourself for some meeting jokes that are finely tailored for adults:

Why did the math teacher always arrive early for meetings? She liked to count on being there first!
Why did the meeting end abruptly? Someone accidentally pressed the emergency exit button instead of the ‘adjourn’ button!
Why did the meeting between the clock and the calendar go so poorly? They just couldn’t find the right “time” to meet!
Why did the man bring a ladder to the meeting? Because he wanted to reach new heights in the corporate world!
Why did the meeting start late? The organizer forgot to set their alarm clock for ‘meeting mode’!
Why did the meeting participants all bring umbrellas? Because they wanted to brainstorm under a “shower” of ideas!
Why did the meeting between the salt and pepper shakers get delayed? Because they needed some “seasoned” professionals to spice it up!
Why did the meeting room smell so bad? Because someone brought a big bag of hot air with them!
Why did the scarecrow attend the meeting? Because he wanted to have a “cornversation” with his colleagues!
Why did the meeting turn into a disaster? Because everyone was talking but nobody was listening!
Why did the phone go to the meeting? It had an important “call” to make!
Why was the meeting like a math test? You hope someone else has the right answer, so you can copy!
Why did the meeting end abruptly? Because the coffee ran out and everyone was “brewing” for a fight!
Why did the hotdog always get invited to meetings? It knew how to “ketchup” with everyone’s progress!
What do you call a meeting where everyone is late? A procrastinators’ convention!
Why did the scarecrow refuse to go to the meeting? It heard it was a corny event!
Why did the office workers always have meetings in the afternoon? Because they couldn’t handle mourning people in the morning!
Why did the scarecrow become a successful salesperson? Because he was outstanding in his field (of meetings)!
Why did the meeting between the artist and the banker become chaotic? They couldn’t agree on the balance between creativity and profit!
Why did the meeting get delayed? Because the boss couldn’t find the right tie to match their power trip!
Why did the meeting turn into a disaster? It had too many minutes!
Why did the math teacher always arrive late to the meetings? Because he could never count on time!
What did one meeting say to the other? “Let’s not meet like this again!”
Why did the meeting between the computer programmer and the musician turn into a disaster? They couldn’t find the right beat!
Why did the coffee always excel in meetings? Because it was always brewing up great ideas!
Why did the scarecrow attend the meeting? It wanted to show off its outstanding “stalk” record!
Why did the meeting go on for so long? Because the boss couldn’t stop talking about his vacation!
Why did the computer attend the meeting? It wanted to join the web of discussions!
Why was the meeting between the math teacher and the English teacher so tense? They couldn’t agree on the right angles!
Why did the manager schedule a meeting in the afternoon? Because they wanted to see who could stay awake after lunch!
Why did the tomato go to the meeting? It wanted to “ketchup” with everyone!
What did one wall say to the other at the meeting? “I hope we can make a strong “connection”!”
Why did the meeting room smell like a bakery? Someone brought a hot loaf of gossip to share with everyone!
Why did the meeting between the bookshelf and the chair go smoothly? Because they both supported each other!
Why was the meeting between the book and the bookmark so uneventful? They couldn’t find a good plot to discuss!
Why did the meeting between the artists feel like a sitcom? Because they couldn’t agree on the punchline!
Why was the meeting room always so chilly? Because it was full of cold shoulders!
Why did the manager bring a pillow to the meeting? To make sure nobody “meeting” falls asleep!
Why did the meeting between the cat and the dog end in chaos? They couldn’t see eye to eye on the purr-fect strategy!
Why did the meeting end with a round of applause? Because it was finally over!
Why did the meeting become so heated? Because everyone wanted to be the top dog, but they were barking up the wrong tree!
Why did the meeting with the new clients feel like a circus? Because everyone was juggling their egos!
Why did the meeting between the tree and the squirrel go nuts? They couldn’t agree on who had the higher branch!
Why did the meeting take a nap? It was board!
Why did the meeting attendees bring umbrellas? They heard it was going to be a brainstorming session and didn’t want to get showered with ideas!
Why did the meeting take place in the bakery? Because they needed some dough!
Why did the chair feel nervous before the meeting? It couldn’t sit still!
Why did the pencil skip the meeting? It couldn’t make any point (pencil point)!
Why did the introvert dislike meetings? They prefer to have a one-on-none conversation!
Why did the meeting start singing? To break the ice!
Why did the meeting turn into a dance party? Because the boss decided to break the ice with some funky moves!
Why did the coffee cup go to the meeting? It heard there would be a latte interesting people there!
Why did the light bulb skip the meeting? It didn’t want to be held responsible for any bright ideas!
Why did the computer go to the meeting? It heard there would be a lot of “byte”-ing discussion!
Why did the mathematician hate attending meetings? They always felt “irrational”!
What do you call a meeting that is interrupted by a fire alarm? A heated discussion!
Why did the employee bring a pillow to the meeting? Because they knew it would be a snooze-fest!
Why did the meeting of gardeners never start on time? Because they were always waiting for someone to turnip!
Why do meetings always go so long? Because they’re a great way to avoid doing any actual work!
Why did the pencil go to the meeting? To take notes and make a point!
What did the boss say to the employee who arrived late for the meeting? “Better late than never, but never late is better!”
Why did the computer go to the meeting? It wanted to network and find some byte-sized opportunities!
What’s the best way to survive a boring meeting? Pretend to take important notes and doodle funny cartoons instead!
Why did the meeting room get so hot? Because all the attendees were full of hot air!
Why did the meeting between the vampire and the ghost go so well? They both love a good haunting discussion!
Why did the ghost attend the company meeting? Because it was great at haunting deadlines and scaring procrastinators!
Why did the meeting room feel crowded? Because it was filled with all the elephant-sized egos!
Why was the math book sad? Because it had too many problems, just like a meeting without an agenda!
Why did the meeting go on for so long? Because no one could find the exit!
Why did the scarecrow go to the meeting? It wanted to learn how to be outstanding in its field!
What did one meeting say to the other? “Let’s make this a brief encounter!”
Why was the meeting between a pencil and a notebook always unproductive? Because they couldn’t find any common lead!
Why did the meeting go on for so long? Because everyone kept bringing up old beef!
Why did the meeting attendees all start singing? Because they were trying to find some harmony in the discussion!
What’s the difference between a meeting and a circus? At a circus, you have clowns in the ring. In a meeting, you have ringmasters!
Why did the pencil bring a notepad to the meeting? Because it wanted to take “meeting” notes!
Why did the computer go to the meeting? It wanted to network with other devices!
Why did the meeting keep getting interrupted? Because the chairperson couldn’t control their phone addiction!
Why did the meeting between the ocean and the beach go swimmingly? They had great waves of communication!
What do you call a meeting that’s full of boring people? A “snooze” fest!
Why did the meeting room feel like a zoo? It was filled with babbling monkeys and attention-seeking peacocks!
Why was the calendar always nervous before a meeting? It had too many dates to remember!
Why did the soccer ball hate attending meetings? It always got kicked around and never had a say!
Why did the coffee file a police report after the meeting? It got “mugged”!
Why did the meeting between the tailor and the pharmacist end awkwardly? They couldn’t find a common thread!
Why did the cucumber get promoted after the meeting? It always knew how to “pickle” the right ideas!
Why did the meeting between the smartphone and the charger have a power struggle? They both wanted to be in charge of the conversation!
Why did the meeting turn into a guessing game? Because the presenter had a tendency to beat around the bush!
What’s the difference between a meeting and a circus? One involves clowns and the other involves circus animals!
Why did the tree want to hold a meeting? It needed to get to the root of the problem!
Why did the clock feel frustrated at the meeting? It always felt second best!
Why did the meeting feel like a circus? Because there were too many clowns and not enough serious performers!
Why did the meeting between two trees go well? Because they understood each other’s roots!
What do you call a meeting between a squirrel and a bird? A “tree”-mendous collaboration!
Why did the meeting participants feel like they were in a zoo? Because there were so many monkeys trying to be the center of attention!
Why did the math book feel nervous before the meeting? It was afraid of its problems being multiplied!
What do you call a meeting full of book lovers? A novel gathering!
Why did the chicken attend the meeting? To show everyone how to cross the road successfully!
Why did the tree refuse to attend the meeting? It didn’t want to be a part of a “branch” of government!
Why did the pencil refuse to attend the meeting? It couldn’t draw any conclusions!
Why did the meeting between a baker and a musician end so quickly? They couldn’t find any common “flour”!
Why did the meeting room get divorced? It couldn’t handle all the board meetings!
Why did the meeting turn into a comedy show? Because everyone was “punning” out of control!
Why did the meeting end early? The boss had a date with his golf clubs!
Why did the meeting turn into a comedy show? Because the boss was telling jokes instead of giving instructions!
What did the office chair say at the meeting? “I’ve been sitting on this important matter for far too long!”
Why did the skeleton avoid attending the meeting? Because it didn’t have the guts for it!
Why did the meeting start late? Because the organizer accidentally booked a room on the wrong floor!
What do you call a meeting where no one agrees? A “stale” mate!
Why did the meeting room apologize to the attendees? It didn’t mean to “con-fuse” everyone with its layout!
Why did the meeting between the calendar and the clock end quickly? Because they were on the same schedule!
What do you call a meeting of the least punctual people? A “running late”-ive session!
Why did the coffee always attend meetings? It loved being brewed in the company of professionals!
Why did the smartphone attend the meeting? Because it wanted to make some connections!
Why did the pencil hate attending meetings? It always felt like it was being lead on!
Why did the meeting go on for so long? The boss couldn’t stop beating around the bush!
Why did the mathematician attend the meeting? Because he wanted to solve the equation of success!
What do you call a meeting that lasts for hours? A marathon of boredom!
Why did the meeting room feel cold? It was filled with “drafts”!
Why did the chair feel lonely during the meeting? It couldn’t find anyone to sit on its lap!
Why did the coffee bean feel anxious during the meeting? Because it kept getting roasted by the boss!
What do you call a meeting between two people who constantly argue? A “debate”able situation!
Why did the meeting go on for so long? Because everyone was in denial!
Why did the ghost attend the meeting? It wanted to show off its hauntingly good presentation skills!
Why did the skeleton refuse to attend the meeting? It didn’t have the guts to go!
Why did the meeting go so well? Because everyone was on the same “agenda”!
Why did the meeting feel like a circus? Because there were a lot of “juggling” of ideas!
Why did the vampire enjoy meetings? He loved the “biting” sarcasm!
Why did the doctor cancel the meeting? It was a “sick” day!
Why did the comedian bomb at the meeting? He couldn’t find the “punchline” in his presentation!
What do you call a meeting where everyone is wearing pajamas? A “siesta”!
Why did the meeting between the clock and the watch go so well? Because they had great “timing”!
Why did the introverted person avoid attending meetings? Because they preferred “mee-ting” people one-on-one!
What do you call a meeting with no agenda? A “waste” of everyone’s time!
Why did the comedian attend the business meeting? He wanted to spice it up with some laughter!
Why did the meeting attendees feel like they were in a horror movie? The boss kept saying, ‘Let’s take a stab at it!’ every five minutes!
Why did the meeting room feel like a sauna? Because everyone was sweating over their deadlines!
Why did the tomato turn red during the meeting? Because it saw the salad dressing (dressing up) for success!
Why did the light bulb get promoted after the meeting? It had a bright idea!
Why did the meeting between the artist and the mathematician end in frustration? They just couldn’t “draw” a conclusion!
Why did the computer file get elected as the meeting’s secretary? It had a “byte-sized” advantage!
Why did the tomato turn red during the meeting? It couldn’t ketchup with all the discussions!
Why did the meeting between the clock and the calendar get canceled? They had a scheduling conflict!
What do you call a meeting that never starts? A complete waste of time!
Why did the baker go to the meeting? He kneaded some dough!
Why did the calendar refuse to go to the meeting? It didn’t want to face the daily grind (calendar grid)!
Why did the new employee always bring a pillow to the meeting? He wanted to dream about a better job!
Why did the meeting go on for hours? Because the boss couldn’t find the “end” button on his PowerPoint!
Why did the meeting between the baker and the mathematician go so well? They both knew how to divide the pie!
Why did the meeting go so smoothly? They bribed the office coffee machine with extra beans!
Why did the meeting room always smell so bad? Because it was full of “air” heads!
Why did the employee bring a ladder to the meeting? Because they heard it was a high-level discussion!
Why did the meeting get so heated? Because someone turned up the “meeting” temperature!
Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything, just like the excuses people come up with for missing meetings!
Why was the meeting between the hammer and the nail so productive? They knew how to hit it off and get things done!
Why did the scarecrow always look forward to meetings? It loved a good “corn”versation!
Why did the math teacher never miss a meeting? Because she knew how to “sum”mon her attendance!
Why did the meeting turn into a disaster? Because everyone had a different agenda!
What’s the difference between a meeting and a circus? At a circus, you have clowns running the show, and at a meeting, you have jokers sitting around the table!
Why did the meeting between the chef and the comedian turn into a food fight? They couldn’t resist cracking jokes about the main course!
Why did the meeting between the coffee and the donut get postponed? They needed more time to brew up their ideas!
Why did the meeting get delayed? Because the boss couldn’t find his “time” management skills!
Why did the clock feel awkward during the meeting? It always felt like it was running out of time!
Why did the computer go to the meeting? To discuss its motherboard issues!
Why did the meeting between the pen and the paper last for hours? Because they had a lot to write home about!
Why did the calendar refuse to go to the meeting? It felt like its days were numbered!
Why did the ghost attend the meeting? It wanted to ex-boo-riate itself!
Why did the meeting attendees bring their umbrellas? Because they heard there was a brainstorm coming!
Why did the meeting between the pencil and the eraser go so well? They both knew how to erase their mistakes!
Why did the meeting between the chef and the baker get heated? They couldn’t agree on the perfect dough-cision!
Why did the math teacher never miss a meeting? He loved working out all the angles!
Why did the meeting go on for hours? Because everyone was trying to avoid actual work and pretend they were being productive!
What did the chair say to the table during the meeting? “Let’s keep this meeting leg-en-dary!”
Why did the clock go to the meeting? It wanted to “hand” over its report!
Why did the meeting turn into a comedy show? Because the presenter couldn’t resist cracking jokes about PowerPoint slides!
Why did the smartphone get a standing ovation at the meeting? It had the best apps-solute performance!
Why did the coffee always arrive late to the meeting? It was always “brew-sing” for the perfect moment!

Meeting Joke Generator

Spicing up your office meetings with a dash of humor can be a real agenda-setter.

(Now that’s a meeting joke!)

That’s where our FREE Meeting Joke Generator leaps in to lighten the mood.

Engineered to integrate puns, office humor, and playful witticisms, it creates jokes that are sure to bring some laughter to your meeting room.

Don’t let your meetings become dull and monotonous.

Use our joke generator to brew up jokes that are as engaging and interactive as your most successful meetings.

FAQs About Meeting Jokes

Why are meeting jokes so popular?

Meeting jokes are popular because they touch upon a universal experience.

Everyone, at one point or another, has attended a meeting and probably experienced some of the humorous situations that can arise in these settings.

They provide an outlet for the common frustrations and absurdities that often occur in professional environments.

Can meeting jokes help in professional situations?

Indeed, they can!

A well-placed joke can relieve tension, foster camaraderie, and make meetings more enjoyable.

However, it’s essential to use discretion and ensure the joke is appropriate for the setting and won’t offend any attendees.

How can I come up with my own meeting jokes?

Observe common situations that occur in meetings—late arrivals, long presentations, tech glitches, etc.
Think about common phrases or jargon often used in meetings, like synergy, circle back, or touch base, and find ways to playfully twist them.
Consider the people who typically attend meetings. Different roles and personalities can provide fodder for humor.
Use the setting of your joke to your advantage. Is it a Zoom meeting gone wrong? A heated boardroom discussion? A boring presentation?
Inject humor through exaggeration, unexpected punchlines, and wordplay. Puns often work well in meeting jokes!