795 Subway Jokes for Urban Explorers and City Dwellers

If you’ve arrived here, it means you’re ready to embark on a journey through the tunnel of Subway jokes.

Not just any jokes, but the express train of humor.

That’s why we’ve compiled a list of the most hilarious Subway jokes.

From puns about subway sandwiches to one-liners about the metro, our compilation has a joke for every station of life.

So, let’s jump on board the laugh train of Subway humor, one joke at a time.

Contents show

Subway Jokes

Subway jokes are the perfect way to lighten up your daily commute or make you chuckle at the thought of public transportation.

These jokes take a humorous dive into the everyday experiences of riding the subway, from the crowd-packed carriages to the bizarre sights that can only be found in underground transit systems.

Subway jokes capture the essence of urban life, and anyone who has ever braved a morning rush hour will surely find them relatable.

The comedy in subway jokes comes from the absurdities and peculiarities of subway travel, exaggerating them in a playful manner.

It’s all about those you know you’re on a subway when…

moments that turn mundane commutes into laughter-filled journeys.

Ready to embark on a humor-filled subway ride?

Brace yourself and hold on to the laughter rails with these subway jokes.

Why did the subway skip the gym? It didn’t want to be known as a “sub”way!
What did the subway say to the other subway? I’m all fired up for this trip, let’s roll!
Why was the subway sandwich always grumpy? It couldn’t ketchup with all the mustard!
Why did the subway rider bring a ladder on board? Because they heard the sandwiches were stacked!
Why did the sandwich ask the subway for directions? Because it was feeling lost between the buns!
Why did the subway get into a fight with the train station? It wanted to be the sub-station!
What’s a subway’s favorite type of music? Underground hip-hop!
What did the subway say to the train? I’m under a lot of pressure!
Why don’t subway trains ever get grounded? Because they always stay on the rails!
How do subway sandwiches stay cool? They’re always surrounded by fans!
Why did the subway get a good grade in school? It always stayed on the right track!
What did the subway sandwich say to the customer? I’m really into you, lettuce be together!
Why was the subway sandwich always upset? It just couldn’t ketchup with the fast food trend!
Why did the subway break up with its partner? It felt like it was always being taken for a ride.
Why did the subway sandwich start an argument? It couldn’t make up its mind about its toppings.
Why did the subway driver bring a ladder to work? Just in case he wanted to climb the corporate ladder!
What did the subway conductor say to the passengers? Mind the gap between your sandwich fillings!
Why did the tomato turn red when it rode the subway? It saw the mustard and got embarrassed!
Why did the subway chef get arrested? He was caught “sub”-marinating the evidence!
Why did the subway break up with the burger? It wanted something a little more on track!
Why did the subway chef become a magician? He could turn a foot-long into a disappearing act!
Why did the bread bring headphones on the subway? To avoid the crustacean noise!
What did the subway sandwich say to the customer? You’re the missing ingredient in my life!
Why did the sandwich go to jail? It was on a roll!
What do you call a subway that’s not in service? A sub-stitute!
Why don’t sandwiches ever propose on the subway? They’re afraid of getting rejected on an underground!
What do you call a sandwich that you make on a crowded subway? A subway club sandwich!
Why don’t subway trains make good comedians? Because their jokes always go off the rails!
Why did the subway driver start telling jokes? To make sure everyone had a “sub-lime” experience!
Why did the subway decide to become an actor? It wanted to be a sub-stitute!
Why did the sandwich go to jail? It was caught loafing around the subway station!
What did the subway say to the busy commuter? Mind the gap, but don’t forget your sandwich!
Why did the subway become a stand-up comedian? It wanted to get a good “platform” for its jokes!
Why did the subway ride take so long? Because it kept getting sandwiched between other trains!
Why did the subway sandwich always win in a fight? It knew how to roll with the punches!
Why did the subway decide to go on a diet? It wanted to shed some tracks.
Why did the subway train get in trouble? It couldn’t make up its mind between being a hoagie or a hero!
Why did the subway call a plumber? It had a leaky sub.
What did one subway say to the other subway during rush hour? I can’t “sand-wich” you in any closer!
Why did the subway train always carry a sandwich with it? It wanted to have a sub-par-tner!
Why did the sandwich go to the subway to work? Because it kneaded the dough!
What do you call a subway sandwich that tells jokes? A hoagie with a sense of humor!
What did the subway say to the bread? You make me feel so sub-stantial.
Why did the sandwich bring a ladder to the subway? Because it wanted to reach the top of the sandwich board!
Why did the subway sandwich always lose at poker? It couldn’t control its poker face, it always gave away its fillings!
What did the subway sandwich say when it won the lottery? “I’m rollin’ in dough!”
Why did the subway get in trouble? It had a bad track record!
Why did the subway get into trouble? It couldn’t keep its tracks straight!
Why did the cookie get off the subway? It couldn’t catch its train of thought!
Why was the subway sneezing? It had a bad case of the sub sniffles!
What do you call it when a subway train makes a dad joke? Subway humor.
Why did the subway sandwich refuse to attend the party? It didn’t want to be a wrap-star!
Why did the subway refuse to serve lettuce? It already had enough cabbage in its budget!
What did the subway say to the customer who complained about their sandwich? Sorry, we don’t give sub-par service!
What’s the best way to eat a subway sandwich? By “sub”merging it in delicious toppings!
What did the subway say to the passenger who wanted a refund? Sorry, we don’t make stops on that track!
Why did the pickle refuse to get on the subway? It didn’t relish the idea!
What did the subway conductor say to the unruly passenger? You’re off the rails!
Why did the lettuce refuse to ride the subway? It didn’t want to leaf its head stuck in the doors!
What did the bread say to the subway conductor? “I knead to go on this train.”
Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything, even subway sandwiches!
Why was the subway sandwich so good at math? It always knew how to count its fillings.
Why did the subway station get so upset? It couldn’t handle all the footlong puns anymore!
What do you call a group of subway riders who always tell jokes? The pun-dertakers!
What do you call a subway that doesn’t move? A sandwich shop!
What do you call a subway that never moves? A foot-long sandwich!
Why was the subway train always tired? It had a lot of tracks to run on!
Why was the sandwich cold when it got off the subway? Because it had just been through the subzero!
What did the subway say to the train tracks? “You’re really on the right track!”
Why was the subway sandwich always upset? It couldn’t find its condiments!
Why did the bread go to the subway station? To catch the next train to Whole Grain Junction!
Why did the subway musician get kicked out? He kept playing “sub”-par tunes!
Why did the subway apologize to the sandwich? It didn’t “meat” its expectations!
Why did the subway run late? It got stuck in a “subway surfers” game!
Why did the subway attend the comedy show? It wanted to improve its subway-tilization skills!
Why did the sandwich go to the movies? It wanted to catch a sub-titled film.
Why did the subway become a detective? It was always on the lookout for a sandwich thief.
Why did the sandwich go to the subway instead of the gym? It wanted to get its daily bread!
Why did the subway chef become a comedian? Because they knew how to serve up some hilarious punchlines!
What did the bread say to the subway sandwich? You’re the only bun for me!
Why did the sandwich go to the subway? It wanted to meet its roll model!
Why did the sandwich get off at the wrong subway stop? It couldn’t make up its mind, it was feeling a bit “sub-way!” .
Why did the sandwich go to the subway station? It wanted to get to the meat and greet!
What did the bag of chips say to the subway sandwich? “I’m so crushed on you!”
Why did the subway miss its stop? It got distracted by all the “subway surfing” going on!
Why did the sandwich bring a pillow to the subway? It wanted to catch some zzz-subs!
Why did the sandwich go to the subway station? To get some fresh tracksuits!
What did the sandwich say to the subway ticket? “You’re the only one who gets me inside!”
Why did the subway sandwich go to art school? Because it wanted to be a wrap artist!
Why did the subway sandwich go to the gym? It wanted to get fit for the sub-athon!
Why did the man bring a ladder to the subway station? He heard the sandwiches were stacked!
Why did the subway station hire a comedian? Because it wanted to keep the commuters laughing on the tracks!
Why did the subway get a ticket? It couldn’t stay out of the subway station!
How do subway riders stay cool? They sit next to the fans.
How does a subway sandwich like to travel? On an underground express train!
Why did the subway sandwich go to the therapist? It had too many layers and needed to be sandwiched in between sessions!
Why did the sandwich go to school on the subway? It wanted to get a little extra “sub-education”!
Why did the subway station get a medal? Because it went above and beyond the call of duty.
What did the subway rider say when someone took their seat? “That’s just subway-ticious!”
Why did the subway sandwich bring a map to the party? Because it didn’t want to get lost in the sandwich shuffle!
Why did the sandwich take a nap on the subway? It was feeling a little too well-wrapped!
What did the subway say to the train? “Don’t you dare lettuce go!”
What did the subway say to the sandwich who wanted to ride for free? Sorry, but that’s a “bun-do” offense!
What do you call a sandwich that talks a lot on the subway? A sub-way too chatty!
What did the subway train say to the sandwich? All aboard the mayo-rific express!
Why did the turkey take the subway? Because it had to go cold turkey!
What do you call a group of sandwiches riding the subway together? A sub-division!
What did the sandwich say when it won the race against the hot dog? “I’m on a roll!”
How do subway trains flirt? They give each other cheesy pick-up lines.
Why did the sandwich go to school? To become a “sub”stitute teacher!
Why did the subway get a high score on its test? It aced the “sub-tractions”!
What did the subway sandwich say to the customer? You’ve really got a lot of subway-tude!
What did the sandwich say to the subway worker? You’re really making me feel saucy!
Why did the pickles have a great time on the subway? They relished every moment!
What did the sandwich say to the subway station? Stop loafing around and get to work!
Why don’t subway trains ever go on vacation? They don’t like to take breaks!
What did the subway conductor say to the sandwich? Mind the gap, mayo fall out!
What did the subway say to the frustrated passenger? “Sorry, I’m underground right now.”
What did the subway say to the train conductor? “You’re just not my type, you’re too underground!”
Why did the subway passenger bring a ladder? Because they heard the subway was full of underground platforms!
What do you call a sandwich that you find on the subway tracks? A hoagie with extra grit!
What do you call a subway with no bread? A below-ground transportation system!
Why was the subway sandwich always the life of the party? Because it was always on a roll!
What do you call a subway worker who can sing? A “sub”way performer!
What do you call a subway station that’s full of sheep? A baa-terchange!
Why did the subway station get a promotion? Because it was outstanding in its field.
Why did the bread take the subway to work? It couldn’t find a better roll!
Why did the subway passenger bring a pillow? In case they got caught napping on the express train!
Why did the subway sandwich become a detective? Because it was tired of being a hoagie in the crowd and wanted to solve the missing toppings mystery!

Short Subway Jokes

Short subway jokes can be compared to the unexpected twists and turns of a subway route – quick, surprising, and full of humorous stops.

These jokes are perfect for sharing during a daily commute, posting as a social media status, or for making small talk with fellow passengers.

The beauty of short subway jokes lies in their capacity to blend everyday experiences with wit, serving up amusement in a few short lines.

So, hold onto your tickets!

Here are some short subway jokes that will make your journey a whole lot more amusing.

What do you call a sandwich that’s afraid of heights? A sub-terrified!
Why was the subway sandwich cold? It couldn’t find the sandwich toaster!
What do you call a sandwich who tells funny jokes? A sub-wit!
Why did the subway conductor become a musician? He had good tracks!
Why was the subway late? It took a sub-way longer than expected!
What’s a subway’s favorite movie? Train-spotting!
Why don’t sandwiches ride the subway? They can’t find their way home!
What is a subway’s favorite type of music? Rhythm and Subs!
Why did the sandwich become a detective? It loved solving sub-terfuge!
Why don’t subway sandwiches make good detectives? They’re always too sandwiched!
Why don’t ghosts ride the subway? They prefer to float!
What do you call a sandwich that steals? A subway-criminal!
Why don’t sandwiches ever ride the subway? They’re always loafing around!
What do you call a sandwich that doesn’t share? A sub-hoarder!
What did the bread say to the subway? You’re the loaftop transportation!
Why was the subway always angry? It had too many delays!
Why did the sandwich go to school? To get smarter bread!
Why was the subway such a good listener? It was always underground!
What do you call a subway with no bread? An underground train!
What’s a subway’s favorite subject in school? Subtraction!
Why did the scarecrow ride the subway? He needed some fresh straw!
Why don’t subway trains ever go on vacation? They’re always on track!
What did the mayonnaise say to the sub? “You’re looking mayo-nice today!”
How did the subway say sorry? It offered a fare-ple!
Why don’t sandwiches go to jail? Because they’re too fresh for prison!
What’s a subway sandwich’s favorite kind of music? Wrap!
What did the subway sandwich say to the customer? I’m feeling saucy!
What’s a sandwich’s favorite type of math? Sub-traction!
What’s a subway’s favorite type of weather? Sub-zero!
Why don’t subway trains ever get lost? They always know their tracks!
What’s a sandwich’s favorite type of transportation? The sub-way!

Subway Jokes One-Liners

Subway jokes one-liners are the epitome of humor packed into a single sentence.

They’re the verbal comparison of catching the subway right on time – swift, seamless, and remarkably witty.

Creating a great subway one-liner demands a mix of cleverness, precision, and a profound love for the art of puns.

The challenge is to fuse the setup and punchline in a concise form, delivering maximum humor in the shortest possible phrase.

Here’s hoping these subway one-liners help you navigate the tunnels of humor and bring you to the destination of laughter:

I walked into a Subway and asked for a veggie sandwich. The employee asked, “Do you want lettuce with that?”. I replied, “No, I want it on a plate!”
What did the subway sandwich order for dessert? An underground cake!
My friend got a job at the subway station, but he can’t seem to make ends meet.
Why did the scarecrow take the subway? Because it heard it was a great way to get a-head!
I used to work at a subway station, but I quit because it was always just one train of thought after another.
I went to a sandwich shop in a subway and asked for a foot-long. The guy said, “Sorry, we only have 12-inch subs.” I replied, “That’s okay, I still have 11 other inches.” .
I once fell asleep on the subway and woke up to find myself in a completely different city. Talk about a surprise trip!
The subway is the only place where you can witness a live performance of “Dancing with the Poles.”
Why did the subway get in trouble at school? It couldn’t stay in a straight line!
I went to the subway and asked for a footlong. They gave me a ruler and told me to measure it myself.
I got lost in a subway station once, but luckily I found my way back to the sandwich shop.
Why did the math book go to the subway? Because it had too many problems to solve!
I love the subway, it’s the only place where it’s socially acceptable to eat a footlong sandwich while sitting on a stranger’s lap.
Why was the subway sandwich always so tired? It couldn’t catch a break, it was always on a roll!
I asked the subway worker if they had any gluten-free options, and they said, “Sure, just take the train to the next stop.” .
Why did the subway station break up with its partner? They had too many trains of thought!
I overheard a conversation on the subway about a guy who had a sandwich for every meal, he was really a sub-human.
Why did the subway train go to therapy? It had a lot of emotional baggage!
I went to Subway and asked for a sandwich with everything on it. The employee said, “Sorry, our definition of everything is a little different from yours.”
I always get a seat on the subway, it’s the one next to the guy who’s manspreading like he’s trying to give birth.
I always thought subway was a sandwich shop, turns out it’s just a really long underground train ride.
I asked the subway worker if they had any vegetarian options. They said, “Sure, we have a sandwich with all the veggies, but it’s just called ‘lettuce meat.'” .
I fell asleep on the subway and woke up in a new city. Turns out, sleepwalking is cheaper than airfare!
I found a subway sandwich under my bed. I guess that’s where I sleep-eat.
I tried to impress the girl next to me on the subway by eating my sandwich with chopsticks, but it just ended up being a subway fail.
I saw a subway poster that said, “Stand clear of the closing doors!” I guess they didn’t want anyone getting sucked into a parallel universe.
Why did the subway station get a new clock? Because it wanted to make sure all the trains were on time… except the delayed ones.
The subway conductor told me to move to the back of the train, so I moonwalked my way there.
Why do they call it “subway” if it’s mostly above ground?
I asked a subway performer if they took requests, and they said, “Sure, as long as you’re requesting silence.”
Why did the sandwich go to therapy? It had too many layers and couldn’t handle the pressure of being squished on the subway!
I tried to start a sing-along on the subway, but all I got were annoyed glares from fellow passengers.
What do you call a subway train that sings? A tuneful locomotive.
I fell asleep on the subway and woke up to find someone had drawn a mustache on my face with mustard.
I told the subway employee that I wanted extra mayo on my sandwich. They said, “Sorry, we’re a mayo-nnaise-free zone.”
Why did the subway take a nap? It needed some rest from all the underground work.
If I had a dollar for every time I got lost in a subway station, I’d be able to afford a taxi.
I got lost in a subway once and asked for directions. The attendant said, “Just follow the tracks.” I replied, “I’m not a dog, I can’t sniff my way back.” .
I ordered a footlong at Subway, but they only gave me 11 inches. I feel cheated!
Why was the subway sandwich having a bad day? It couldn’t find its better half!
Why did the subway station become a musician? It wanted to start a band-train.
I tried to take a selfie on the subway, but every time I pressed the button, the train would make a sudden stop. Talk about photobombing!
I asked the sandwich artist at Subway to make me a joke. He said, “Sure, I’ll whip one up for you!”
I saw a guy on the subway wearing a shirt that said, “I’m on a roll.” I guess he really loves sandwiches.
I asked the subway sandwich artist to make me something vegetarian, so they handed me a sandwich with just lettuce.
What do you call a sandwich that always misses its stop on the subway? A sub-wayward!
Why did the subway sandwich get a promotion? It had the best filling for the job!
Subway stations are like mazes, but with more confused people and less cheese.
Why did the subway run out of money? It had a one-track mind!
I told my friend I was going to take the subway, and he said, “That’s a great way to get fresh air.”
The only thing worse than a crowded subway car is a crowded subway car with a mariachi band.
Why did the subway station feel lonely? It was tired of being underground!
Why did the subway sneeze? Because it had a case of the subway sniffles!
I asked the subway employee if they could make me a sandwich, but they just gave me a blank stare.
What did the subway say to the sandwich? “You’re on the right track, lettuce be friends.”
Subway delays are the only time you’ll see strangers bond over their mutual hatred for public transportation.
I asked the subway worker if they had any discounts for frequent customers. They said, “Sure, but only if you can find the secret underground entrance.”
I told the Subway worker I wanted a sub with extra mayo. They replied, “Mayo-nnaise yourself!”
Why did the subway station become a chef? It wanted to specialize in sub-continental breakfasts.
The subway doors have a better sense of timing than my ex. They always close just as I’m about to catch the train.
I tried to start a conversation with a stranger on the subway, but they just looked at me like I was off the rails.
Why did the subway chef get arrested? He couldn’t keep his hands off the grinder!
I saw a sign on the subway that said “No eating on the train,” so I started eating on the subway platform instead.
Why did the subway passenger take a tomato to the train station? They wanted to catch the next express-sauce.
I asked the Subway worker if they could make me a footlong. They replied, “Sorry, we only have 12 inches.”
Why did the subway get promoted? It was always on track and never derailed from its responsibilities!
If I had a dollar for every time I missed my subway stop, I’d have enough money to buy a car and never ride the subway again.
I thought I saw a celebrity on the subway, turns out it was just someone eating a footlong.
I saw a subway sandwich so big that it had its own subway station.
I had a dream that I was eating a giant subway sandwich. But then I woke up and realized I was just sleepwalking to the fridge again.
Why did the subway station always have the best parties? It knew how to throw a sub-lime bash!
Did you hear about the sandwich who won the lottery? It became a “million sub” winner!
Why did the subway break up with its significant other? They just couldn’t get on the same track!
I asked the subway conductor how they stay on track, and they replied, “I just follow the sandwich crumbs.”
Why did the ghost ride the subway? It wanted to feel like it was boo-ming along!
I told the Subway employee that I was on a diet, and they said, “Don’t worry, our sandwiches are just bread and dreams.”
I used to work in a subway until I got fired for making too many cheesy puns.
I tried to impress a date by showing off my subway card collection, but they just thought I was a little off track.
I always feel like a detective when trying to find my way through the subway maze.
Why did the hot dog refuse to go into the subway? It didn’t want to end up in a roll of strange meat.
I always feel like a detective when I’m on the subway, trying to figure out which passenger’s food smells the best.
What did the subway say to the sandwich? “You’re my main squeeze, lettuce be together forever!”
I told my friend I was going to Subway, and they asked if I needed a train ticket.
Why did the subway get a divorce? It couldn’t make ends meat!
I tried to impress a girl on the subway by doing a magic trick, but I accidentally made my sandwich disappear instead.
Why did the subway refuse to play cards? It didn’t want to deal with all the underground kings and queens!
I saw a subway performer who played a tuba made out of subway rolls. They really know how to roll with the music! .
I tried to flirt with the sandwich artist at Subway, but she told me I was just trying to meat her expectations.
I always feel like a superhero when I manage to squeeze into a crowded subway car without touching anyone.
Why did the subway attend a comedy show? It wanted to get some underground laughs!
Why did the Subway sandwich start a fight? It couldn’t handle all the beef!
I tried to impress a girl on the subway by doing a backflip, but I guess she wasn’t impressed with my platform skills.
If you want to experience true fear, try eating a subway sandwich on a crowded train without dropping any toppings on someone’s lap.
Why did the subway sandwich file a police report? It got mugged on its way to the station!
The subway is a great place to test out my telepathic powers, because it’s the only time I can hear other people’s thoughts: “Please stop staring at me!”
Why did the pickle feel nervous on the subway? It was in a bit of a pickle!
What did the subway sandwich say to the hot dog? “I’m way more underground than you.” .
Why did the subway get tired? It had too many tracks to run on!
I took a ride on the subway and accidentally ended up in Narnia.
I went to the subway and asked for a sandwich. The worker handed me a shoebox and said, “Here’s your sole food.”
I ordered a sub from Subway and asked for it to be toasted. The employee said, “Sure, do you want it extra crispy or just enough to warm your heart?”
Why did the pickles refuse to ride the subway? They didn’t want to get into a pickle with all the crowds!
Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the subway and thought it was a hot dog!
What did the sandwich say to the subway? Lettuce go for a ride, it’s time to ketchup!
I brought a parachute on the subway, just in case the sandwich artist went overboard with the toppings.
I can never decide whether subway is my favorite mode of transportation or my least favorite sandwich chain.
I went to a Subway and asked if they had any special offers. They said, “We have a six-inch sub of the day.” I replied, “That’s not special, that’s half-off!”
Why don’t subway trains ever gossip? Because they know how to keep their tracks secret!
The subway is a great place to practice your pole dancing skills… unintentionally, of course.
I asked the subway conductor if the train went to Flavor Town, and he said, “No, but it does make a stop at Deliciousville.”
Why did the subway become a chef? It wanted to make sub-lime creations!
The subway is a great place to practice your acting skills. Just pretend you’re not uncomfortable being squished like a sardine.
I asked the subway attendant if they sold footlong subs, but they just handed me a measuring tape.
I tried to impress my date by ordering a footlong sandwich at Subway, but I ended up with a 12-inch sub.
Why did the bread at Subway start a fight? It had a lot of roll rage!
The best way to make friends on the subway is to borrow someone’s phone and say loudly, “Mom, I told you to stop calling me in public!”
Why did the subway conductor bring a ladder to work? Because he heard the subway was always underground!
What’s a subway’s favorite sport? Track and field!
I asked the subway attendant if I could bring my pet snake on board. He said, “Sure, as long as it’s not a constrictor fare.”
I’ve learned that the subway is the quickest way to get from Point A to Point B, as long as you don’t mind stopping at Points C, D, E, F, G, H…
I asked the subway train if it wanted to hear a joke, but it just said, “Sorry, I’m not in the mood. I’ve been under a lot of pressure lately.”
I went to the subway and asked for a vegetarian sandwich. They gave me a tomato slice between two pieces of bread and said, “Enjoy your ‘nothing’ sandwich!”
I told the subway conductor that I lost my wallet on the train. He said, “Well, now you’re just running on empty.”
I tried to make a Subway sandwich at home, but it just didn’t have the same sense of impending doom.
I thought I saw a celebrity on the subway, but it turned out to be someone who just had a really good subway makeup tutorial.
I was feeling brave, so I gave my phone number to someone on the subway. They texted me, “You dropped this” along with a photo of my dignity.
I asked the subway worker if they had any sandwiches with a lot of meat. He said, “Yeah, the train that just passed had a cow on it.” .
I accidentally fell asleep on the subway and woke up in a parallel universe where people actually talk to each other.
I once got stuck in a subway turnstile and had to call for help. They sent a magician instead of a maintenance worker.
Took the subway to work today and realized that my fellow commuters could easily form a synchronized coughing team.
Why did the subway chef get a promotion? Because he was really good at giving people the cold shoulder.
I tried to make a sandwich on the subway, but my ingredients kept sliding away.
Why did the subway chef become an astronaut? He wanted to make sandwiches in space.
I asked the Subway employee how they manage to perfectly cut the sandwich in half every time. They replied, “It’s all about balance and a little magic. We call it ‘subway leviosa.'”
Sometimes I wish the subway had a drive-thru so I could get my sandwich fix without having to leave my car.
I asked the subway sandwich artist for extra mayo, but they just handed me a jar of Hellmann’s.
I asked the subway conductor if this train goes to Sandwich Town. He said, “No, but it’ll get you pretty close to Subville!”
I saw a squirrel nibbling on a sandwich in the subway. I guess it wanted a subway nutwich!
I asked the subway conductor if the train was going to be crowded, and he said, “Nah, it’s just a little ‘sub-way’ right now.”
Why did the sandwich go to jail? It was breadful of subway-cious activity!
I went to Subway and asked for a sandwich with extra pickles. The employee said, “Sorry, that’s not kosher.”
Why don’t ghosts like riding the subway? They can’t stand the eerie silence!
I went to Subway and asked for a sub with everything. They gave me a dictionary!
I told my friend I had a subway named after me. Turns out it was just a footlong sandwich with extra ham.
What do you call a subway sandwich that sings? A hoagie with perfect pitch!
I asked the subway worker what the most popular sandwich was. They replied, “The one that doesn’t fall apart when you pick it up.”
I was so hungry on the subway that I started hallucinating and thought the subway map was a menu for sandwiches.
I once saw a rat in the subway that looked like it was on its way to a job interview.
I asked the subway attendant if they had any job openings, and they said, “Sorry, we’re just trying to keep things underground.”
Why did the sandwich go to the subway to find a date? It wanted someone with a good filling.
Why did the subway employee get in trouble? Because they couldn’t keep their station under wraps.
I saw a squirrel running across the subway tracks and thought, “Wow, even the rodents use public transportation.”
Why did the subway make a great lawyer? It knew how to argue for a fare deal.
I asked the subway sandwich artist to make my sub with extra mayo, but they just rolled their eyes and handed me a snorkel.
The subway is a great place to practice my dance moves, especially when I accidentally pole dance during rush hour.
I accidentally got on the wrong train today. Now I’m the proud owner of a subway surfboard.
The subway is the only place where you can comfortably stand shoulder to armpit with strangers and not feel weird about it.
I tried to catch the subway, but it was running late. Apparently, it needed to finish its makeup first.
I asked the Subway worker if they had any secret menu items, and they said, “Yes, we have the ‘Subway Surprise.’ It’s when we can actually fit all the ingredients into the bread without it falling apart.”
I used to work at a Subway, but I couldn’t handle the pressure, so I quit cold turkey.
My friend said he saw a rat in the subway. I told him it was just Jared trying to get his old job back.
Subway seats are like a game of musical chairs, except there’s no music and the chairs are sticky.
I told the subway performer that they were “subway-erb”, and they responded, “Well, I do try to make my art…sandwiching!”
Why did the subway become a comedian? It wanted to make everyone laugh on the underground!
I asked the Subway employee if they could make my sandwich faster, and they said, “Sorry, we don’t do instant transmission.”
What did one subway train say to the other? I’ve got tracks to run on, and you’re just loafing around!
Why did the subway car break up with its partner? It wasn’t on the same track anymore.
I asked the subway employee if the bread was fresh, and they said, “Well, it’s not stale…yet.”
My local subway station has a great underground comedy club, it’s just a shame the jokes always go over my head.
Why did the subway station break up with its partner? It wasn’t a good platform for a relationship.
I asked the subway artist to draw me like one of their French sandwiches. They looked at me confused and said, “We only do foot-longs here.” .
Why did the subway break up with the sandwich? It couldn’t ketchup with its fast pace!
Subway workers make great sandwich artists, but terrible train conductors.
I told the Subway worker that I wanted a footlong, and they replied, “Sorry, we only serve metric sandwiches here.”
I tried to make a subway sandwich at home, but I couldn’t find the tracks for the ingredients. .
I asked the subway worker if they made fresh sandwiches every day. They said, “No, we just reheat the ones from yesterday’s rush hour.” .
I once fell asleep on the subway and woke up to find my sandwich missing. It was a real subway crime.
My friend tried to impress me by making a subway sandwich at home, but it was just a sub-par imitation.
I thought I was riding the subway, but it turns out I was just sitting on a really fast park bench.
Why did the subway get a promotion? It always had a good track record!
I asked the subway worker if they had any secret menu items. They replied, “Yeah, it’s called going to another restaurant.”
I asked the subway sandwich artist for extra mayo, and they gave me a jar instead.
Why did the subway miss its stop? It was too engrossed in a good book!
I told the subway worker that I wanted a healthy option. They handed me a picture of a salad and said, “Here’s your virtual greens.”
I always bring my own headphones on the subway so I can pretend to ignore the weird conversations happening around me.
I saw a sign on the subway that said, “No eating or drinking,” so I just had a feast for my eyes.
What did one subway say to the other subway? We make a great pair of tracksuits!
I asked the subway worker if they could make me a sandwich with extra attitude, and they said sorry, it’s not on the menu.
Why don’t subway trains ever go to school? Because they already know how to multiply tracks!
Why did the sandwich always win in a fight? It always had a sub-way out!
I went on a subway ride and realized it was a lot like my love life – delayed and full of unexpected stops.
I told my friend I had a subway sandwich for lunch, and he asked if it had a good plot twist. .
Why did the subway employee always carry a ladder? In case he needed to reach the sub-ceiling.
The best part about taking the subway is when the conductor announces, “We apologize for the delay,” and you can feel the collective eye roll of everyone on the train.
Why did the subway passenger bring a map? Because he wanted to be prepared for any subway-tastrophe.
The subway is like a vending machine for interesting smells, you never know what you’re gonna get.
I told the Subway worker that I wanted a vegetarian sandwich, and they asked, “Do you mind if we sprinkle a little bacon dust on top?”
My favorite thing about the subway is playing “Is that smell coming from the person next to me or the train itself?”
I once asked the Subway employee for a recommendation, and they said, “Our sandwiches are really good. I hoagie you try one!”
I tried to make a subway sandwich at home, but it just ended up being a sub-par imitation.

Subway Dad Jokes

Subway dad jokes are a hilarious mix of quick-witted puns and play on words that can bring about eye rolls and hearty laughter simultaneously.

They’re the ideal jokes for those who appreciate humor that’s so terrible, it’s actually brilliant.

Perfect for brightening up your commute, entertaining fellow passengers, or just breaking the ice at social gatherings.

Hold on tight to your seats and prepare for an amusing ride.

Here are some subway dad jokes that are sure to make your day:

Why did the sandwich always pay for others on the subway? Because it was a real hero-sandwich!
What did the sandwich say to the subway ticket collector? “Lettuce go through without any delays!”
Why did the sandwich get off at the wrong subway station? Because it was bread wrong!
What did the sandwich say to the subway train? “You’re the sub of my dreams!”
Why did the sandwich take the subway instead of driving? Because it couldn’t find a parking spot for its crust.
Why did the sub sandwich become an astronaut? It wanted to explore the space between bread and fillings!
Why did the lettuce refuse to get on the subway? It had already been tossed too many times!
What did the subway conductor say to the passengers? “Mind the gap, it’s foot-long!”
Why did the sandwich take a taxi instead of the subway? It didn’t want to be a sub-way too long!
Why did the subway hire a math teacher? Because it wanted someone to add more toppings!
Why don’t subway trains ever get lonely? Because they always have plenty of tracks to keep them company!
Why did the subway car bring a book to the party? It wanted to be well-read.
Why did the Subway sandwich go to therapy? Because it felt like it was always getting sandwiched between people!
Why did the subway go to the doctor? Because it had a sub-par performance!
Why did the subway feel lonely? Because it had no-body to ride with!
Why was the subway sandwich always running late? It couldn’t ketchup with the schedule!
Why did the subway sandwich refuse to go to the party? It didn’t want to get wrapped up in drama!
What do you call a subway that’s always cold? A chilly cheese “sub”!
What do you call a sandwich that you make on a sunny day? A subshine!
Why did the subway sandwich never make it as a comedian? Because it always got too wrapped up in its jokes.
Why don’t sandwiches trust the subway? Because they always end up getting wrapped in a sub-par delivery.
What did the subway sandwich say to the impatient passenger? “Please have some patience, I’m just trying to make ends meat!”
Why did the subway break up with its significant other? It wanted to be single-track!
Why did the subway refuse to play cards? It was afraid of getting dealt a “sub”par hand!
Why don’t subway stations ever date each other? Because they’re always on different tracks!
How do you make a sandwich on the subway more exciting? Add some spice to your life with jalapeños!
Why did the sandwich become a detective? It wanted to solve the subway mysteries!
What did one subway say to the other? Let’s meat up at the next station!
Why did the subway chef get fired? He couldn’t make a “sub”stantial sandwich!
Why did the subway conductor bring a ladder? To reach the high notes while singing sandwich songs!
Why did the subway station become a popular place for lunch? It had plenty of good tracks to eat on!
Why did the lettuce go to the subway? To get a fresh start!
Why do subway sandwiches make great comedians? They always know how to deliver a punch-line!
What do you call it when a subway sandwich talks to you? Subliminal messaging!
Why did the subway station break up with its boyfriend? He just couldn’t stay on track!
Why did the subway driver bring a shovel to work? In case he had to dig the underground!
Why did the subway conductor love sandwiches? Because they had so many good fillings!
Why did the sandwich get off the subway at every station? Because it couldn’t make up its mind!
Why did the bread go to the subway station? Because it heard there were a lot of rolls there!
Why did the sandwich start a band after riding the subway? Because it was inspired by the subway’s underground music.
Why did the lettuce refuse to ride the subway? It didn’t want to be a part of a sandwich’s commute!
Why don’t subway employees ever get sad? Because they know how to roll with the punches!
Why did the ghost take the subway to work? Because he didn’t want to scare the cab drivers!
What do you call a subway sandwich that you can’t trust? A sub-standard!
Why was the math book always taking the subway? It had too many problems to solve on the bus!
Why did the onions go to the subway? To catch the next underground train!
Why did the subway passenger get a ticket? Because they couldn’t keep their feet off the seat.
Why did the subway musician bring a ladder with him? He wanted to reach the high notes!
Why did the Subway sandwich become an artist? Because it wanted to make subway art!
Why did the sandwich take the subway to work? Because it didn’t want to get caught in traffic jamwiches!
Why did the sandwich get in trouble on the subway? It was spreading too much mayo.
Why was the subway so crowded? Because it was the peak lettuce hour!
Why did the sandwich go to the gym? To get a little extra mustard!
Why did the tomato blush on the subway? It saw the pickles “relishing” their time together!
What’s the best way to make a subway sandwich laugh? Give it a good pickles-up line!
Why did the sandwich always win at poker? Because it always had the best sub-card!
Why did the subway station give a sandwich an award? It was a sub-stantial achievement!
What did the subway sandwich say to the hungry passenger? “Lettuce meat in the middle!”
Why did the sandwich artist become an astronaut? Because he wanted to explore the “sub-lunar” space.
What’s a sandwich’s favorite mode of transportation? The subway – it’s the most ‘sub’stantial way to get around!
Why did the sandwich go to the party alone? Because it couldn’t find a date!
What do you call a subway employee who can’t make sandwiches? A sub-standard worker!
What did the subway sandwich say to the deli clerk? You’re my sub-hero!
What did the subway say to the train? Let’s make tracks and roll together!
What do you call a subway that is always busy? A packed lunch!
Why did the bread take the subway to work? It didn’t want to be loafing around!
What do you call a subway employee who is always late? A subpar conductor.
Why did the subway sandwich win an award? It was the best in its sub-category!
Why did the subway ask the sandwich to leave? Because it couldn’t handle the loafing around!
Why did the sub get a job at the train station? Because it wanted to be a sub-way employee!
Why don’t sandwiches play sports? Because they would rather loaf around!
Why did the sandwich apologize to the subway? It thought it was on the wrong track!
Why did the sub sandwich go to the gym? It wanted to work on its six-pack abs!
Why did the bread go to the subway station? Because it heard it could get a good roll there!
Why did the subway’s math teacher take away its calculator? It was trying to solve a “sub”traction problem!
What kind of music do sandwiches listen to on the subway? Sub-woofers!
Why did the sub sandwich break up with its partner? Because they couldn’t find common ground on the toppings!
Why did the sandwich artist start working at the subway restaurant? Because they kneaded the dough!
Why don’t subway trains ever get cold? Because they’re always running on “sub-heated” tracks!
Why did the sub refuse to ride the subway? Because it heard it was too underground!
Why do sandwiches like to ride the subway? Because it’s the best way to become a “well-rounded” meal!
What’s a subway’s favorite type of sandwich? A sub-marine!
Why did the Subway restaurant start serving salads? Because they wanted to offer sub-stantial healthy options!
What do you call a subway that has no doors? A sub-exit!
Why did the subway become an artist? It wanted to draw a lot of attention!
What do you call a sleepwalking sandwich? A sub-conscious!
Why did the sandwich get a ticket on the subway? It didn’t have a proper subway fare!
Why did the sandwich feel embarrassed on the subway? It couldn’t handle all the staring!
Why did the subway get good grades in school? It always knew how to make the right tracks!
Why did the sandwich bring a ladder to the subway station? Because it heard the subs were on a higher level!
What do you call a sandwich that won’t stop singing on the subway? A hoagie with a big sub-woofer!
Why did the subway have such good manners? It always knew when to hoagie!
Why did the cucumber refuse to take the subway? It didn’t want to become a “pickle” in the crowded train!
Why did the sandwich feel uncomfortable on the subway? It couldn’t find a comfortable seat in the bread aisle!
Why did the Subway sandwich need a bandage? Because it got a little too wrapped up in itself!
What do you call a sandwich that’s always running late for the subway? A missed-steak!
Why did the sandwich go to the subway station? It wanted to get a good roll on the tracks!
What is a subway’s favorite song? “Don’t Stop Believin'” by Journey.
Why did the subway train go to school? Because it wanted to get smarter and earn a “sub-degree”
Why did the bread get a job at the subway station? Because it kneaded the dough!
Why did the subway station become a musician? Because it was tired of being just a platform!
Why don’t sandwiches ever ride the subway? Because they prefer to loaf around!
Why do sandwiches enjoy riding the subway? It’s a great way to get a good roll in life!
Why did the sandwich go to the subway? Because it wanted to get on the right track!
Why did the sandwich get a ticket at the subway station? It was caught loafing around!
What’s a subway’s favorite board game? “Sub”bopoly!
Why did the subway attend therapy sessions? Because it needed to work on its “sub-conscious”
Why did the subway chef start a band? Because he wanted to make some tracks on the sandwich music scene!
Why did the subway station open a bakery? Because it wanted to make some “sub-rolls”
What do you call a sandwich who can sing and dance on the subway? A sub-way performer!
What do you call a sandwich that’s afraid of riding the subway? A chicken sub.
Why did the sandwich feel claustrophobic in the subway? Because it was always getting squished between other sandwiches.
Why was the subway so crowded? Because everyone wanted a sub-stantial meal!
What did the subway sandwich say to its toppings? “Lettuce, tomato, and mayo stick together like we’re on a subway!”
Why did the subway sandwich bring an umbrella? In case it ran into a sub-station!
What did the subway sandwich say to the customer? “I’m really a sub-par joke!”
What do you get when you cross a subway sandwich with a computer? A sandwich that crashes in your mouth!
Why did the subway sandwich go to the doctor? It was feeling a little sub-par!
Why did the sandwich go to the subway station? Because it wanted to catch the next train of thought!
Why was the subway so crowded? Because it was packed with delicious sandwiches!
How do you make a sandwich laugh on the subway? Give it a good sub-punchline!
Why was the subway sandwich always cold? It had a lot of chilli peppers!
Why did the subway sandwich blush? Because it saw the dressing and it was mayo-nnaise!
Why did the sandwich break up with the subway? It couldn’t handle the long rolls anymore!
Why did the subway hire a baker? Because they kneaded fresh bread for the sandwiches!
What do you call a subway sandwich with a lot of attitude? A sassy sub!
Why did the sandwich go to the train station? Because it wanted to get its fill of tracks!
Why did the sandwich choose the subway over the bus? It wanted to avoid any traffic jams!
Why did the subway tunnel always win at hide-and-seek? Because it was really good at staying underground!
Why did the subway get a ticket? It didn’t “sub”scribe to the parking regulations!
Why did the subway chef become a detective? Because he loved to grill suspects.
Why did the bread roll get shy on the subway? Because it didn’t want to be the center of attention in the sandwich.
Why did the mayonnaise go to the subway? It wanted to catch the next express condiment!
What did one subway say to the other? “I’m train-ing for a marathon!”
Why was the subway cold? Because the sandwiches had left the door open!
Why did the musician love riding the subway? Because it was a great way to “conduct” himself!
Why don’t subway riders ever get bored? There’s always a new stop to look forward to!
Why did the sandwich always avoid the subway? It didn’t want to be taken for a ride!
Why did the sandwich start working at the subway station? Because it wanted to make some dough!
Why did the subway refuse to play cards? Because it didn’t want to get dealt a bad hand.
Why did the tomato turn red when it entered the subway? Because it saw the mustard and mayo dressing up!
Why don’t sandwiches ride the subway? They prefer to go on a roll!
Why did the bread go underground? Because it was tired of being on a roll!
Why did the subway chef become a comedian? Because he loved to dish out the puns!
Why did the lettuce take the subway? Because it wanted to get its daily dose of vitamin L-train!
Why don’t subway cars ever have money? Because they’re always on the tracks!
Why was the subway always running late? It kept getting sandwiched between traffic!

Subway Jokes for Kids

Subway jokes for kids are like a thrilling roller coaster ride—exciting, fast-paced, and always a fun-filled journey that ends with laughter.

These jokes help children tap into their creativity and understand the unique humor hidden in everyday scenarios, nurturing an appreciation for comedy that’s as lively as a bustling subway.

Moreover, subway jokes for kids have the added perk of making ordinary trips seem extraordinary, transforming their subway rides into an adventure filled with chuckles.

Ready for a laughter-filled trip?

Here are the jokes that’ll have them belly laughing from station to station:

What did the subway say to the hot dog? “You’re the wurst passenger I’ve ever had!”
Why did the subway break up with the sandwich? It didn’t want to be in a subpar relationship!
What did the subway sandwich say to the hamburger? “You’re just not my type, bun!”
How do you fix a broken subway? With subway glue!
Why did the subway go to the dentist? To get a “subway” smile!
What’s a subway’s favorite type of music? Rhythm and choo-choo!
Why did the cookie take the subway? It didn’t want to crumble under the pressure!
Why did the subway go to the doctor? It had a case of locomotive-motion!
Why did the subway train carry an umbrella? In case it rained tracks!
How do you know if a subway is happy? It’s always on the right track!
Why did the bread go to therapy after riding the subway? It had a lot of loafing to do!
What kind of money do they use on the subway? Doughnuts, because they’re always rolling in the dough!
What did one subway train say to the other? I think I’ve taken you for a ride before!
What did the subway say to the sandwich? You’re the pick of the bunch!
What did the subway conductor say to the passengers? All aboard the laughter express!
What do you call a subway that won’t stop talking? A “chatter train”!
What did the subway say to the passengers? Mind the gap, or you might fall into a wrap!
Why was the subway train always late? Because it kept losing track of time!
Why was the sandwich cold after it rode the subway? Because it forgot to take its coat off!
What do you call a sandwich that you make at a subway station? A sub-par sub!
Why did the sandwich get off at every subway stop? Because it was on a roll!
Why did the subway train get a ticket? Because it was caught speeding on the tracks!
Why did the tomato bring an umbrella on the subway? Because it heard it was going to be a sub-rain!
What do subway employees do at lunchtime? They take a sub-break!
Why did the sandwich miss its stop on the subway? It was too busy hamming it up!
Why did the subway always win the race? It had a lot of tracks!
What’s a subway’s favorite card game? Subway-uno!
What do you call a subway sandwich that’s always in a hurry? A fast-food train!
What did the subway sandwich say to the pizza? You can’t top me!
Why did the subway train get in trouble at school? Because it was always going off the tracks!
How do subway trains apologize? They say “I’m sorry for any delays, but I’m trying to stay on the right track!”
Why did the subway train feel sad? It had too many tracks and it couldn’t make up its mind!
Why did the subway train love to tell jokes? Because it had a great sense of track-humor!
Why did the subway get in trouble at school? It couldn’t keep track of time!
Why did the lettuce go to the subway station? It wanted to go for a ride on the salad train!
Why did the subway conductor bring a ladder on the train? Because the train had too many high points!
What do you call a sandwich that rides the subway every day? A ‘sub’way sandwich!
Why did the subway driver become a teacher? Because he wanted to give his students a ride through education!
What is a train’s favorite sandwich? Subway club!
What do you call a sandwich that you eat while standing on the subway platform? A sub-station snack!
What did the subway say to the passenger? Mind the gap and don’t get too subway-ted!
What do you call a train that loves sandwiches? A sub-locomotive!
Why did the subway sleep on top of the sandwich? Because it wanted to be a sub-layer!
Why did the subway stop serving sandwiches? Because it wanted to focus on its main track-tivities!
Why did the lettuce bring a radio on the subway? It wanted to “turnip” the volume!
How do you make a subway float? Add root beer and a scoop of ice cream!
What did one subway say to the other subway? I’m underground, man!
Why did the sandwich get off the subway? It realized it was going in the wrong direction—against the grain!
Why did the vegetable take the subway? It didn’t carrot all for driving!
What do you get when you cross a subway and a snowman? A chilly ride!
Why did the sandwich go to school on the subway? Because it wanted to become a smart sub!
Why did the subway break up with its girlfriend? It said they were always going in different directions!
What kind of sandwiches are good at playing sports? Sub-marines!
Why did the cookie take the subway? Because it didn’t have enough dough for a taxi!
Why don’t subway trains ever get in trouble at school? Because they always follow the tracks!
What do you call a subway that lost its way? A sub-merged train!
What do you call a subway with no passengers? A loaf of bread!
Why did the train go to the sandwich shop? It wanted to “meat” some new passengers!
Why did the lion bring a fishing rod on the subway? Because he wanted to catch the subway sandwich!
Why did the subway train get in trouble? It kept taking “sand-witches” without asking!
Why did the sandwich avoid the subway? It didn’t want to get “saucy” with the condiments!
What’s a subway’s favorite type of music? R-Train ‘n’ B!
What do you call a sandwich who can’t find its way on the subway? A sub-lost!
Why did the subway get angry at the sandwich? Because it was always hogging the seats!
Why did the subway break up with the sandwich? It just wasn’t their type, they were on different tracks!
Why was the subway so good at math? Because it knew all the tracks and numbers!
What do you call a sandwich that you eat while riding the subway? A subs-way!
Why did the sandwich start dancing on the subway? Because it had some fresh beats!
Why did the pickle get off the subway at every stop? It wanted to relish the journey.
What is a subway’s favorite song? “Rolling in the Bread”
Why did the sandwich refuse to ride the subway? It had too many layers and didn’t want to get crowded!
Why did the subway always bring a pen and paper? Because it liked to take notes on the underground!
What did the sandwich say to the subway? Take me to the platform, I’m ready to roll!
What do you call a cat that rides the subway? A Choo-choo train!
Why do subway trains make good comedians? Because they have plenty of punchlines!
What did the passenger say to the subway? “Please stop giving me the cold shoulder!”
What did the subway say to the impatient passenger? “I’ll be there in a subway minute!”
Why did the sandwich get off the subway? Because it heard someone say it was full of “baloney”!
Why did the sandwich bring a suitcase on the subway? It wanted to go on a “subway-cation”!
Why was the subway hot and crowded? Because it had too many passengers and no air-conditional!
Why did the cookie take the subway? It wanted to visit its chocolate chip friends at the next station!
Why don’t subway trains ever gossip? They just mind their own tracks!
Why did the subway train always win at games? Because it always had the upper track!
Why did the bread take the subway to work? Because it didn’t have a carbo-locomotive!
Why did the baker go to the subway station? Because he wanted to make some rolls!
What do you get if you cross a subway and a math test? A multipli-subcation!
What’s a subway’s favorite type of music? Rap music, because it loves tracks!
Why did the subway get a ticket? Because it couldn’t stay on the right track!
What do you get when you cross a subway and a dog? A subway sandwich with extra bark!
Why did the lettuce love riding the subway? Because it always got a good leaf of absence!
Why did the subway eat its ticket? Because it wanted a fast food meal!
What do you call a ghost on a subway? A transparent commuter!
Why did the hot dog refuse to ride the subway? It didn’t want to be a “wiener” underground!
What do you call a sandwich that you can ride? A sub-marine!
What is a subway’s favorite subject in school? Geometry, because it’s all about lines!
Why did the subway take a nap? It needed to catch some zzz-train!
What do you call a subway that’s afraid of the dark? A scaredy-choo-choo!
Why did the bread get off the subway? It needed to get a good loaf in!
What do you call a train that’s made out of lettuce? A sub-green!
Why did the subway chef become an artist? Because he loved drawing subway sandwiches!
Why did the subway train visit the doctor? It had a bad case of “loco-motive”!
Why was the subway train always tired? Because it had too many long hours!
What do you call a sandwich that takes a lot of subway rides? A subway commuter roll.
Why did the subway stop at the bakery? To get a fresh roll on board!
What do you call a train that sneezes? A choo-choo-choo-choo-choo-choo!
Why did the bread get on the subway? Because it had a “loaf” of places to go!
What do you call a cat that lives in the subway? A mouse-ta-rail!

Subway Jokes for Adults

Who said that adults can’t have a hearty laugh over subway jokes?

Subway jokes for adults elevate the level of humor, integrating sophisticated wit with a hint of audacity.

Just like a well-timed train, these jokes combine elements of humor, intellect, and a bit of impertinence for a truly unforgettable chuckle.

Perfect for casual gatherings, office lunch breaks, or simply to break up the monotony of a long commute, these jokes are sure to add an element of fun to any situation.

Here are some subway jokes that are just the ticket for adults:

What did the subway sandwich say to the fast-food burger? You’re on a roll!
What did the commuter say to the subway turnstile? Let me through, I’m train-ing!
Why did the subway conductor become a stand-up comedian? He knew all the best tracks!
Why was the subway station always so tired? It had too many tracks in its life and needed a break!
What do you call it when a subway train gets a divorce? An “underground” separation!
Why did the subway sandwich break up with its partner? They couldn’t find any common fillings!
Why did the subway passenger bring a deck of cards? Because they wanted to “shuffle” between stops!
Why did the tomato turn red on the subway? It saw the mustard squeeze its way onto a hot dog!
What do you call a sandwich that you accidentally drop on the subway floor? A subway footlong!
Why do subway musicians always play their instruments so loudly? Because they love to “sub-woofer” their audience!
Why did the sandwich refuse to ride the subway? It heard it was always full of baloney!
What do you call a subway train that tells great stories? A locomoteller!
What’s a subway’s favorite type of music? Rap – it’s all about the tracks!
Why did the subway station get angry? Because people were always taking it for granted!
Why did the footlong sandwich go to therapy? It had an identity crisis in the subway!
Why did the subway driver become a rapper? He loved dropping bars and making tracks!
Why did the tomato refuse to ride the subway? It couldn’t “ketchup” with the schedule!
Why did the subway turn into a dance party? The passengers couldn’t resist the rhythm of the tracks!
Why did the subway get a gym membership? It wanted to be a subway train-er!
Why don’t subway employees ever get lost? Because they always know which way the sandwich is headed!
Why did the Subway employee always win at poker? They were an expert at reading the sub-tle signs!
Why did the subway station become a comedian? It wanted to keep things on the right track!
Why did the subway passenger start a band? Because they knew how to keep the rhythm on the subway’s bumpy tracks!
Why did the subway station start a band? Because it had great platforms for musicians!
Why did the subway get a ticket? It was caught “under the influence” of too many passengers!
Why did the subway platform go to the therapist? It had a complex about always being stepped on!
Why did the subway train refuse to eat the sandwich? It was too “sub-way” for its taste!
Why did the subway station become a gym? Because it wanted to help commuters get their daily subway-exercise!
Why did the subway passenger bring a pillow on board? Because they heard it was a “rest” stop!
Why was the subway so hot? Because it had too many jalapenos!
What did the subway say to the train? “I’m always underground, but you’re always on track!”
Why did the subway train go to therapy? It had too many tunnels to work through!
Why did the subway lose the race against the snail? It couldn’t find the finish line!
Why did the subway sandwich always carry a map? It didn’t want to get lost in all the layers of toppings!
Why did the subway conductor become a magician? Because they could always “pull” the train out of a hat!
Why did the subway fare get arrested? It was caught trying to escape the turnstiles!
Why did the subway conductor become a chef? He wanted to put his track skills to use and serve up some delicious subways!
What did one subway car say to the other? “I think we’re on the right track!”
Why did the subway rider bring a ladder? Because they wanted to reach new heights on the train!
Why did the subway train start dating the sandwich? Because it was looking for a fulfilling relationship!
Why did the subway sandwich refuse to go to the party? It felt too sandwiched between all the other guests!
Why did the subway train always have the best relationships? It knew how to stay on track!
Why did the subway get in trouble? It couldn’t stay on track!
Why did the man bring a ladder onto the subway? Because he heard the train had high fares!
What do you call a musician who travels by subway? A jam band!
Why did the math book take the subway? Because it wanted to solve some train problems!
Why did the sandwich refuse to ride the subway? It was afraid of being sandwiched between strangers!
What did one subway say to the other subway? I knead you in my life!
Why don’t subway trains ever go on a diet? They can’t resist the tracks!
Why don’t skeletons ever ride the subway? They don’t have the guts to!
Why did the Subway restaurant hire a math teacher? Because they wanted someone who could really count on their footlongs!
What do you call a subway sandwich that’s always late? A procrastinator! It never gets delivered on time!
Why did the subway go to the art gallery? It wanted to see some underground art!
Why did the subway chef become a comedian? He always had a great punchline when making sandwiches!
Why did the subway love going to the gym? It wanted to stay on track!
Why did the subway train break up with its partner? It felt it was getting railroaded in the relationship!
Why did the subway station throw a party? It wanted to celebrate all the connections it’s made over the years!
Why did the Subway station break up with its partner? They just couldn’t make the connection anymore!
Why did the sandwich choose the subway over the bus? Because it wanted to have a sub-licious ride!
Why do people always feel hungry on the subway? Because the train is always on a roll!
Why did the bread refuse to ride the subway? It didn’t want to be called a “sub roll”!
What’s a subway’s favorite exercise? Running on the tracks!
Why did the subway sandwich artist become a detective? Because they always knew how to find the perfect ingredients for a case!
Why did the Subway sandwich start singing in the middle of the subway? It wanted to be the hero of its own sub-plot!
Why did the sandwich start singing on the subway? It wanted to be the next underground sensation!
Why did the Subway restaurant start offering delivery? Because they wanted to make sure their customers could get their subs on the right track!
What do you call a subway sandwich that tells jokes? A “sub”liminal comedian!
Why did the man bring a ladder onto the subway? He wanted to reach new heights on his commute!
Why did the Subway employee become an astronaut? They wanted to explore new “sub”terranean territories!
Why don’t subway passengers ever gossip? They’re always on the same track!
Why did the Subway employee get fired? They couldn’t make ends meat!
Why did the Subway sandwich feel lonely? It was tired of being surrounded by cold cuts!
Why did the subway decide to go on a diet? It wanted to get into better shape, especially after seeing all those foot-longs!
Why did the subway sandwich refuse to go on a roller coaster? It didn’t want to roll with the wrong crowd!
Why did the subway break up with its girlfriend? She was always taking things too fast!
Why was the subway sandwich always on time? It had a good track record!
What did the subway say to the passengers who couldn’t find a seat? “Don’t worry, we’ll get you back on track soon!”
Why did the subway sandwich break up with its partner? It couldn’t handle the commitment, it was always getting wrapped up!
Why did the subway chef become a comedian? Because he had a lot of good punchlines!
Why did the subway train get kicked out of the comedy club? It had too many tracks that didn’t land!
Why did the subway train become a stand-up comedian? Because it was always on track with its punchlines!
Why do subway riders make good detectives? They’re always on the lookout for clues on where the seats are available!
Why did the sandwich fall asleep on the subway? It was just loafing around!
Why did the sandwich refuse to ride the subway? It was just too high maintenance!
Why did the bread love riding the subway? It enjoyed getting a “subway tan” from the overhead lights!
Why did the subway system invest in a fancy restaurant? It wanted to be known for its underground cuisine!
What did the Subway sandwich say to the customer who couldn’t decide on their toppings? “It’s okay, take your time. We’re not going anywhere… until the train arrives!”
Why do subway riders make great detectives? Because they can always “track” where they’ve been!
Why did the Subway sandwich skip town? It wanted to escape the daily grind!
Why did the subway passenger bring a fishing pole? Because they wanted to catch some subway surfers!
Why did the Subway sandwich go to the gym? It wanted to be a lean, mean, subway machine!
Why was the subway platform so crowded? Because the train was on a roll!
What did one subway say to the other subway? “I’m underground, but I’m still feeling a little “sub-par”!”
Why did the sandwich artist become a magician? Because they could make a footlong disappear in seconds on a busy subway!
Why did the subway driver never get a raise? Because he couldn’t “track” his expenses!
Why did the subway get into a fight? It couldn’t handle the underground pressure!
Why did the sandwich refuse to get on the subway? It didn’t want to be “sandwiched” between strangers!
Why don’t subway trains ever make good comedians? Because their delivery is always late!
Why do subway passengers make great storytellers? They always have a good track record!
Why did the subway station hire a DJ? Because they wanted to keep the passengers grooving while waiting for the train!
What do you call a subway that’s feeling down? A sad-wich!
Why did the mathematician always take the subway? Because it was the quickest way to solve for X!
What did the subway station manager say to the rude passenger? Mind the app-gap!
Why did the subway passenger bring a pillow? Because they wanted to catch some sleep while riding the rails!
Why did the Subway employee win the marathon? They had a lot of “sub”way practice!
Why did the Subway sandwich artist become an astronaut? Because they wanted to make subs in space – the final frontier!
Why did the subway employee bring a ladder to work? Because they heard they were going to be promoted to “station manager”!
Why did the subway artist become a comedian? He couldn’t make a sub that was a joke, so he became one!
Why was the subway conductor so good at telling jokes? They had a lot of train-ing!
What did one subway train say to the other? I’ve got you covered, tracks buddy!
Why did the subway station start serving soup? They wanted to add another track to their menu!
Why did the sandwich go to therapy? It had too many layers of emotional baggage from the subway.
Why did the subway conductor become a comedian? He wanted to “subway-tize” his jokes!
Why was the subway so crowded? Everyone wanted to meatball!
What did the subway sandwich say to the passenger who wouldn’t stop complaining? “You need to stop being so picky!”
Why did the subway station become a chef? It wanted to make sure every sub had the right ingredients for success!
Why did the subway train go to therapy? It had too many issues with commitment and always wanted to break up at every station!
Why did the subway passenger bring a ladder with them? They wanted to reach new heights in their commute!
Why did the chicken cross the subway tracks? To prove it wasn’t chicken!
What did the subway say to the train conductor? “You’re just a sub-par driver!”
Why did the subway sandwich win an award? It was the most outstanding sub of the year!
Why did the bread roll miss the subway train? It loafed around too much and couldn’t catch up!
Why did the Subway sandwich blush? It saw the footlong!
What did the subway say to the sandwich? “I’ve got you covered, I’m the best way to “sub” transport you!”
Why did the subway conductor start a band? Because he had a lot of tracks to mix!
Why did the tomato refuse to get on the subway? It didn’t want to become a “squashed” sandwich!
Why did the ghost choose to ride the subway? It wanted to experience some spectral transportation!
Why did the subway sandwich become an actor? It wanted to play a sub-stantial role in Hollywood!
Why did the subway engineer always carry a pencil and paper? To keep track of the train of thought!
What did the impatient passenger say to the slow subway train? “You’re sub-way too slow!”
Why did the subway go to the dentist? It needed some filling in its tunnels!
Why did the sandwich refuse to ride the subway? It didn’t want to get “submerged” in the crowd!
What did the subway say to the passenger who kept falling asleep? “Wake up, you’re missing your stop!”
Why did the Subway employee get promoted? They always knew how to roll with the punches!
What did the subway say to the train tracks? I’m always crossing paths with you!
Why did the subway always get good grades? It was excellent at passing!
Why do subway stations make great comedians? Because they always have a captive “audience” waiting for the train!
Why don’t subway trains ever get lost? Because they always know which way to go underground!
What do you call a train that eats too much fast food? A subway sandwich!
What do you call a group of subway riders who are always late? The “underground procrastinators” club!
What do you call it when two subway trains collide? A “subway sandwich”!
Why did the subway become an actor? It wanted to make underground movies!
Why did the subway passenger become a stand-up comedian? They were tired of sitting down all the time!
Why was the subway train always so happy? It loved going full steam ahead!
Why did the lettuce get a job at the subway station? It wanted to leaf a good impression on commuters!
Why did the bread go to the subway station? It wanted to catch a train and become a sub roll!
Why did the subway passenger bring a ladder with them? To reach the high expectations of the crowded train!
Why did the Subway train get in trouble with its boss? It kept skipping stations and going on lunch breaks!
Why did the subway get punished? It had too many tracksuits!
What did the subway conductor say to the passengers when they complained about the delays? “Just roll with it!”
Why did the bread and the meat break up in the subway? They just couldn’t find common ground!
Why did the bread go to the subway station? Because it kneaded a little “dough” before boarding the train!
Why did the sandwich go to college? It wanted to get a degree in sub-ology!
Why did the subway train go to college? Because it wanted to get a little engineer degree!
Why did the sandwich refuse to ride the subway? It was afraid of getting too close to the tracks!
What do you call a group of subway riders who can’t stop singing? A “tunnel” choir!
Why was the subway train so nosy? It always wanted to know everyone’s “subway-tions”!
What did the subway say to the traffic jam? Move over, I’m on a roll!
Why did the subway musician get arrested? He was caught conducting illegal tracks!
Why did the subway passenger bring a ladder on board? They wanted to reach the “subway ceiling”!
What do you call a sandwich that gets rejected by the Subway restaurant? A sub-par sub!
Why did the man bring a ladder onto the subway? Because he wanted to reach the high subway seats!
Why did the subway sandwich go to therapy? It had a lot of issues with its layers and couldn’t decide if it was an open-faced sandwich or not!
What do you call a subway sandwich that always tells lies? A baloney sandwich!
Why did the sandwich go to prison? It couldn’t make bail at Subway!
Why don’t subway trains like to get into relationships? They don’t want to be “tied up” on the tracks!
Why did the subway platform start a band? It wanted to perform underground music!
Why did the sandwich go to the subway library? It wanted to check out some fresh breads!
What do you call a sandwich that you get at the train station? A sub-woofer!
Why do subway riders make great athletes? They’re experts at sprinting to catch the closing doors!
Why was the subway station always so crowded? Because everyone wanted to be a part of the “underground” scene!
Why did the subway chef become a stand-up comedian? Because he always knew how to deliver a punchline!
Why did the Subway sandwich become a musician? It wanted to be part of a sub-culture!
Why was the subway station always full of musicians? It had great “subway-acoustics”!
Why did the subway passenger bring a pillow with them? They wanted to catch some Z’s during their ride on the “underground hotel”!
Why did the subway chef become a stand-up comedian? He loved getting all the laughs on the tracks!

Subway Joke Generator

Navigating the world of subway humor can sometimes lead you down the wrong track.

(Caught that pun, did you?)

That’s where our FREE Subway Joke Generator comes in to conduct your laughter.

Engineered to combine witty wordplay, metro mirth, and whimsical witticisms, it fabricates jokes that are sure to derail any gloomy mood.

Don’t let your comedic timing hit a signal failure.

Use our joke generator to create jokes that are as fresh and captivating as an unexpected express train.

FAQs About Subway Jokes

Why are subway jokes so popular?

Subway jokes are popular because they are relatable to anyone who has ever travelled in a subway.

They often involve universal elements like crowded trains, ticket machines, or station announcements, making them fun and familiar to a wide range of people.

Can subway jokes help in social situations?

Definitely!

Telling a subway joke can serve as a great ice-breaker, or bring a bit of levity to any conversation.

Since subways are a common experience, these jokes can connect people through shared humor.

How can I come up with my own subway jokes?

Think about your own subway experiences. What funny or quirky situations have you come across?
Take note of common subway elements like the rush hour, lost tourists, ticket machines, or station announcements and find humor in them.
Look for potential puns in subway-related words and phrases.
Consider the context or setting of your joke. Is it set in a crowded train, a quiet late-night ride, or a bustling platform?
Don’t shy away from exaggeration. The best subway jokes often involve hyperbole to emphasize the humor in everyday situations.