723 Taxi Jokes to Take You on a Hilarious Ride

If you’ve landed here, it means you’re ready to drive into the world of taxi jokes.

These aren’t just any jokes, but the fare-est of them all.

That’s why we’ve pulled together a list of the most hilarious taxi jokes.

From meter-packed puns to hilarious hailing one-liners, our collection has a joke for every ride of life.

So, let’s navigate the bustling streets of taxi humor, one joke at a time.

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Taxi Jokes

Taxi jokes are a hilarious way to liven up your day, even when you’re stuck in traffic.

They’re not just about the taxis themselves, but also the experiences and conversations that take place within them.

From the drivers with their colorful stories to the passengers with their diverse destinations, taxis provide an abundance of comedic material.

Creating a great taxi joke requires a quick wit, an understanding of human nature, and a knack for turning everyday situations into humor.

Like the unpredictable routes that a taxi may take, or the funny encounter you might have with a talkative driver.

Ready for a laugh that will fare well with everyone?

Buckle up and get ready to enjoy these taxi jokes:

Why did the taxi driver have such good relationships with his customers? Because he always knew how to “cruise” their hearts!
What did the taxi driver say to the passenger who asked for a ride to the moon? “Sure, buckle up for a lunar-tic journey!”
Why did the taxi driver lose his job? He couldn’t hack it.
Why did the taxi driver bring a watermelon into the cab? He wanted to have a melon-choly time on his break!
What do you call a taxi driver who only delivers baby animals? A cab-bie!
Why did the taxi driver become a gardener? Because he wanted to plant fare-well trees for his customers!
Why did the taxi driver keep a tennis racket in his cab? In case he got caught in a traffic match!
Why did the taxi driver keep a toothbrush in his cab? In case he picked up a fare that needed a quick pick-me-up!
What do you call a taxi driver who moonlights as a baseball player? A shortstop!
Why did the taxi driver refuse to let the elephant ride in his cab? Because it couldn’t pay trunk fare!
Why did the taxi driver become a tour guide? Because he wanted to take people on a “fare”-mous journey!
Why did the taxi driver break up with his partner? They just couldn’t fare anymore!
Why did the taxi driver become a chef? Because he heard it’s a great way to pick up fares!
Why did the taxi driver go to therapy? He had way too many “fare”-well breakdowns!
What did the taxi driver say to the passenger who couldn’t stop talking? “I guess you’re just ‘fare’-ly talkative!”
Why did the taxi driver start a clothing store? Because he wanted to dress his fares in style!
Why did the taxi driver never get lost? Because he always knew which way was fare-ward!
Why did the taxi driver bring a ladder to work? Because he wanted to elevate his driving skills!
Why did the taxi driver have a pet snake in his cab? He wanted to make sure he had a “hiss”-terical ride!
Why did the taxi driver go to school? Because he wanted to learn how to take people for a ride!
What do you call a taxi that’s never available? A cab-ernet!
Why did the taxi driver refuse to pick up a ghost? He was afraid it would be a “dead” fare!
Why did the taxi driver become a soccer coach? He always knew how to take his team to their destination.
Why did the taxi driver break up with his GPS? It kept telling him to turn right, but he could only make lefts!
Why did the taxi driver start singing? Because he wanted to break the ice with his passengers!
Why did the taxi driver become a tour guide? He didn’t want to get stuck in traffic, he wanted to be on the road to laughs!
Why did the taxi driver keep a flashlight in his cab? In case he needed to “light” up someone’s day!
What do you get when you cross a taxi driver with a doctor? A “cab”-ulance service!
Why did the taxi driver become a chef? Because he wanted to always have a fare and square meal!
Why did the taxi driver become a comedian? Because he wanted to make his passengers laugh all the way to their destination!
Why did the taxi driver refuse to play cards? Because he always avoided picking up a bad fare!
Why don’t taxis ever get lonely? They always have a fare share of passengers!
Why did the taxi driver have to go to acting school? Because he couldn’t stop giving his fares Oscar-worthy performances!
Why did the taxi driver always carry a pencil and paper? Because he wanted to draw some “street” art!
Why did the taxi driver start a gardening business? Because he wanted to “drive” flowers to their destination!
Why did the taxi driver dress up as a ghost for Halloween? He wanted to scare up some extra fares!
What did one taxi say to the other taxi at the dance party? “Let’s taxi the night away!”
Why did the taxi driver never get married? Because he always had commitment issues!
Why did the taxi driver always carry a map? Because he didn’t want to “drive” himself crazy with wrong turns!
Why did the passenger give the taxi driver a high rating? Because he drove him to laughter!
Why did the taxi driver refuse to drive near the bakery? He was afraid of getting a roll-over!
Why don’t taxi drivers ever get a second date? They always insist on going Dutch!
Why did the taxi driver bring a pillow to work? In case he needed to cushion the fare!
Why did the taxi driver have a pet parrot? Because it always knew when to say, “Taxi!”
Why did the taxi driver join a band? Because he heard they were looking for a “cab-a-net” player!
What do you call a taxi that can drive itself? A “cab-autonomous” vehicle!
Why did the taxi driver become a flight attendant? He wanted to experience a different kind of fare and fly!
What did the taxi driver say to the passenger who kept changing their mind? “I’m starting to think you’re just ‘meter’-ing with me!”
Why did the taxi driver always carry a map? So he could “navigate” through any joke thrown at him!
Why did the taxi driver break up with his girlfriend? She was always giving him directions.
Why did the taxi driver get a good report card? Because he was always picking up fares!
What did one taxi say to the other? “I can’t pick you up right now, I’m “farely” busy!”
Why did the taxi driver keep a thesaurus in his cab? To find better ways to tell his passengers “we’re stuck in traffic.”
Why did the taxi driver become a librarian? Because he always loved taking people on a book ride!
Why did the taxi driver go to acting school? He wanted to learn how to put on a good cab-aret!
Why did the taxi driver refuse to play cards? He was afraid of a bad deal!
Why did the taxi driver take his pet parrot everywhere? Because he wanted a “fare” and feathered friend!
Why did the taxi driver get a job at the bakery? Because he kneaded the dough!
Why did the taxi driver bring a broom to work? In case he picked up any street “sweeper” fares!
Why did the taxi driver never become a stand-up comedian? Because his jokes were always driven into the ground!
Why did the taxi driver go to the doctor? He had a fare bit of congestion!
Why did the taxi driver become a chef? Because he knew how to “drive-thru” the orders quickly!
Why don’t taxi drivers ever get lonely? Because they’re always picking people up!
Why don’t taxi drivers like driving in the winter? Because they can’t handle the icy fares!
What do you call a taxi that only works at night? A black cab!
Why did the taxi driver bring a pillow to work? So he could take people on a snooze control!
Why did the taxi driver start a band? Because he heard they make a lot of money from their fares!
What did the taxi driver say to the passenger who was worried about being late? “Don’t worry, I’ll drive like clockwork!”
Why did the taxi driver always carry a map? In case he got “road rage” and needed to tear it up!
Why did the taxi driver have a great sense of direction? Because he always knew the “fare” way!
Why did the taxi driver always carry a map? Because he didn’t want to take the wrong turn and end up in fare-land!
What do you call a taxi that never stops? An unbrakeable cab-ondition!
What did the taxi driver say to the passenger who asked for a ride to the moon? “Sorry, but I can only take you as far as the airport!”
Why did the taxi driver refuse to pick up the passenger with a pet bird? Because he didn’t want any fowl play in his cab!
Why did the taxi driver keep a pillow in his car? For the backseat drivers who always needed a nap!
Why did the taxi driver bring a ladder to work? In case he wanted to take his fares to new heights!
Why did the taxi driver get a degree in psychology? Because he was tired of driving people crazy!
Why did the taxi driver start a band? He heard they always get a good fare.
What did the taxi driver say to the passenger who couldn’t decide on a destination? “Take your time, you’re ‘fare’ from perfect!”
Why did the taxi driver become a chef? He wanted to learn how to make great “traffic” sauce.
Why did the taxi driver become a stand-up comedian? He wanted to drive people to laughter instead of their destinations!
What do you call a taxi that keeps breaking down? A cab-ulance!
Why did the taxi driver start gardening? Because he wanted to learn how to grow a taxi cab-age!
Why did the taxi driver never get a speeding ticket? Because he always took things slowly and hailed carefully!
Why did the taxi driver become an artist? Because he loved drawing attention to himself on the road!
Why did the taxi driver become an actor? He wanted to take his fares to a whole new level.
Why did the taxi driver invite the snake into his cab? Because he wanted a “hiss”-terical passenger!
What did the taxi driver say to the wolf? “Where wolf?” “There wolf!” “Where wolf?” “There wolf!”
Why did the taxi driver start a gardening business? Because he had a green thumb for finding the best routes!
What did the taxi driver do when he found out his fare was a comedian? He kept the meter running for extra laughs!
Why did the taxi driver keep a calculator in his car? To help him with his “fare” math!
Why did the taxi driver take the day off? Because he was tired of always going the extra mile!
Why did the taxi driver wear a seatbelt? Because he wanted to buckle up his passengers and drive them safely to their destination!
Why did the taxi driver get a ticket for reckless driving? He was trying to take shortcuts by going the wrong way on a one-way street!
Why did the taxi driver ask his passengers for their favorite songs? He wanted to make sure he had the right “tune” for their journey!
What did the taxi driver say to the rude passenger? “Meter” in a polite way!
What did the taxi driver say to the passenger who couldn’t decide on the destination? “You’ve got to be driven to distraction!”
What did the taxi driver say to the passenger who asked if he could take them to the moon? “Sorry, that’s a little out of my fare range!”
Why don’t taxis ever get tired? Because they have unlimited mileage!
What did the taxi driver say to the passenger who didn’t have any money? “You can’t run from a fare!”
Why did the taxi driver start a comedy club? He wanted to give his passengers a good laugh while stuck in traffic!
Why did the taxi driver become a chef? Because he loved picking up new recipes!
What do you call a taxi that’s been converted into a bakery? A “bread” and breakfast cab!
Why did the taxi driver get a parking ticket? Because he was “driven” to park in the wrong spot!
What did the taxi driver say to the passenger who asked for a discount? “Sorry, I can’t drive down the price!”
What did one taxi say to the other taxi? “I can’t make any turns without signaling, I’m a cab!”
What do you call a taxi driver who only drives in reverse? A backwards chauffeur!
How do taxi drivers stay cool during the summer? They roll down the window.
Why did the taxi driver refuse to pick up the mathematician? Because he always wanted to calculate the fare in advance!
How do you know a taxi driver is tired? They start making “tire” jokes!
Why did the taxi driver become an astronaut? He wanted to go on a fare-ther space adventure!
Why did the taxi driver become a gardener? Because he loved driving all the plants around town!
What do you call a taxi that wants to run away and get married? A runaway bride!
Why did the taxi driver get a raise? Because he refused to meter around!
Why did the taxi driver become a soccer player? Because he loved taking dives, even on the road!
Why don’t taxis ever get into accidents? Because they always pass the driving test!
What do you call a taxi that plays music? A cab-aret!
What did the taxi driver say to the passenger who wanted to go to the beach? “Shore, I can drive you there!”
What did the taxi driver say to the passenger who couldn’t decide on a destination? “You’re driving me crazy!”
Why did the taxi driver refuse to give a ride to the ghost? He was afraid of a “spook-tacular” fare!
Why did the taxi driver get a ticket for singing in the car? He was in a “car-a-oke” zone!
Why did the taxi driver always carry a map? So he could always find his fare-est way to go!
What do you call a taxi driver who only collects coins? Nickels and dimes!
Why did the taxi driver go to medical school? Because he wanted to give people a “shot” at getting to their destination!
Why did the taxi driver become an artist? Because he was always sketchy about his fares!
Why did the taxi driver bring a pillow to work? To give his customers a “smooth ride” experience!
Why did the taxi driver bring a ladder to work? Because he heard the fares were going through the roof!
Why did the taxi driver quit his job? He lost his “drive” for it!
Why did the taxi driver refuse to pick up the clown? He was afraid of all the “un-fare” laughter!

Short Taxi Jokes

Short taxi jokes are like a surprising turn in a bustling city—swift, thrilling, and unpredictably amusing.

These jokes are perfect for text messages, social media posts, or that moment in a gathering when you need a quick jolt of joy.

The charm of short taxi jokes lies in their ability to be both clever and comedic, sparking laughter in just a few words.

So buckle up!

Here are some short taxi jokes that will drive you to a fit of giggles in no time.

What’s a taxi driver’s favorite type of weather? Fare weather!
Why do taxi drivers never get lost? They always have their fare-ings!
What do you call a taxi that’s always late? A procrasticab!
Why don’t taxi drivers ever get bored? They have fare-iendly conversations!
Why did the taxi driver start meditating? He wanted to find inner-cab-peace!
Why don’t taxi drivers get along? They have too many fare disagreements!
What’s a taxi driver’s favorite type of music? Cabsolutely anything!
Why do taxi drivers never get bored? They always pick up fares!
Why don’t taxis ever get married? They’re always driving someone else!
Why do taxi drivers make terrible comedians? Their jokes never fare well!
Why don’t taxi drivers ever get lost? They always take the fare-way!
Why do taxi drivers make bad comedians? They always miss their punchlines!
Why did the taxi driver become a dance instructor? He loved cha-cha-charging!
What’s a taxi driver’s favorite type of music? Fare-ly Odd Parents!
What’s a taxi driver’s favorite song? “Take a Backseat Driver!”
What’s a taxi driver’s favorite song? “Taxi Cab” by Vampire Weekend!
Why did the taxi driver get a promotion? He always gets fares!
Why do taxi drivers make terrible comedians? Their timing is always off!
Why did the taxi driver get promoted? He knew all the shortcuts!
What’s a taxi driver’s favorite drink? A root beer float!
Why do taxi drivers make great matchmakers? They always find fares!
What’s a taxi driver’s favorite song? “Cab”aret by Liza Minnelli!
What’s a taxi driver’s favorite clothing brand? Fare-nheit!
Why did the taxi driver bring a pencil and paper? For add-fare!

Taxi Jokes One-Liners

Taxi jokes one-liners are the epitome of humour packed into a single sentence.

They’re the verbal equivalent of a smooth taxi ride through a bustling city – quick, surprising, and full of unexpected turns.

Creating a great taxi one-liner requires a mix of ingenuity, timing, and a deep understanding of the art of puns.

The challenge lies in combining the setup and the punchline in a concise form, delivering maximum laughter with minimal words.

May these taxi one-liners drive you to a destination filled with amusement:

What did one taxi say to the other at the taxi stand? “Hey, let’s “fare” off and have a race!”
Why did the taxi driver start a band? He wanted to make sure his passengers always had a good rhythm on the road.
Why did the taxi driver become an astronaut? He wanted to give his passengers “out-of-this-world” experiences!
Why did the taxi driver start a cooking show? Because he knew all the best shortcuts in the kitchen.
Why did the taxi driver start a gardening business? Because he wanted to “fare” well with his plants!
Why did the taxi driver always carry a calculator? Because he liked to divide and conquer.
Why was the taxi driver so successful? He always knew the shortcuts to a passenger’s heart.
What did the taxi driver say to the passenger who wanted to go to the cemetery? “Sorry, I can’t drive you there, that’s a dead end!”
Why did the taxi driver become a gardener? Because he loved giving people a green thumb while driving.
Why did the taxi driver become a doctor? He had a knack for giving his passengers a quick diagnosis of their destination.
Why did the taxi driver refuse to pick up the math professor? He didn’t want to deal with all the square roots!
Why did the taxi driver take a break? He needed a fare-ly good rest!
Why do taxi drivers make good detectives? Because they know all the streets and corners like the back of their hand!
Why did the taxi driver get a degree in physics? Because he wanted to understand the science of cab-acceleration.
What did the taxi driver say when he got stuck in traffic? “I guess I’m just going to have to put my fare in park!”
What do you call a taxi that only accepts vegetables as payment? A veggie-cab!
Why did the taxi driver become a stand-up comedian? Because he was tired of driving people to their destinations without any laughs!
What did the taxi driver say to the wolf on the road? “Hop in, we’re going for a howling good ride!”
What did the taxi driver say to the passenger who didn’t have money for the fare? “Sorry, no change, no change!”
Why did the taxi driver keep a bag of fertilizer in his cab? Just in case he needed to fuel up!
How do taxi drivers stay cool in the summer? They roll down their windows and turn on the “fare” conditioning!
Why did the taxi driver refuse to pick up the ghost? Because he didn’t want any passengers who couldn’t pay in cash.
What do you call a taxi driver who only works at night? A dark knight rider!
What’s the difference between a taxi driver and a thief? The thief only takes your money once!
I asked the taxi driver if he could take me to the airport. He said, “Sure, the meter is running on time.” .
Why did the taxi driver always carry a baseball bat? In case he had to hit a home run with his fares!
I asked the taxi driver if he had change for a dollar. He said, “Sure, here’s your nickel!”
Why did the taxi driver refuse to pick up the clown? He was afraid of getting stuck in a car full of laughs!
What do you call a taxi driver who only gives rides to mathematicians? A cabbie-calcu-lator!
Why did the taxi driver start a band? He wanted to give his passengers a smooth ride with some sweet tunes.
Why did the taxi driver always carry a pencil and paper? In case he needed to sketch out a quick get-away plan!
Why did the taxi driver become a chef? He heard he could make a lot of dough with his fares!
I hailed a taxi and asked the driver, “Can you take me to the bank?” He replied, “Sure, which one, the river bank or the money bank?”
Why did the taxi driver get a good grade in school? Because he always knew the way to drive up his average!
What do you call a taxi driver who loves to dance? A cab-aret performer!
What do you call a taxi that’s also a magician? A cab-trick!
Why did the taxi driver get a ticket? Because he couldn’t make a turn without signaling “fare”well!
Why did the taxi driver become a stand-up comedian? He had a knack for delivering punchlines and driving people insane.
Why did the taxi driver get arrested? He was caught cab-napping!
I told the taxi driver to take the shortest route, and he replied, “Oh, don’t worry, I never take the long way unless I forget the directions!”
I asked the taxi driver if he had any music. He replied, “Sure, I can play anything as long as it’s metered!”
Why did the taxi driver start a rock band? They wanted to get their fares rocking and rolling!
Why did the taxi driver become a barber? He loved giving his passengers a close shave on the fare.
What do you call a taxi driver with a lot of charisma? A cab-tivator!
Why did the taxi driver take up gardening? Because he wanted to make some fare-tilizer!
What did the taxi driver say to the rude passenger? “Take a backseat and enjoy the ride!”
Why did the taxi driver always carry a bag of peanuts? In case he had a fare who was a bit nutty!
What did the taxi driver say to the rude passenger? “You can’t curb my enthusiasm!”
Why don’t taxis ever get married? They prefer to stay single and enjoy the “fare” life!
What did the taxi driver say to the dog who hailed his cab? “Are you ready for a pawsome ride?”
Why did the taxi driver become a musician? He wanted to give his passengers a “fare”well concert during the ride!
Why did the taxi driver become a doctor? Because he heard laughter is the best medicine!
Why did the taxi driver refuse to give the passenger a ride? He felt their conversation would drive him insane!
Why did the taxi driver bring a pillow? Because he wanted to give his passengers a smooth ride to dreamland!
Why did the taxi driver always carry a map? Because he couldn’t find his way without a fare-ends guide!
What did the taxi driver say when he couldn’t find his keys? “I guess I’m just not in the right fare-ame of mind!”
Why did the taxi driver always carry a map? Just in case he lost his bearings… and his passengers!
Why did the taxi driver get a stomachache? He was eating too many fares!
What did the taxi say to the police officer? “I’ve been framed!”
Why did the taxi driver take a break? He couldn’t hack it anymore.
Why did the taxi driver become a stand-up comedian? Because he always had his passengers rolling in the aisles!
Why did the taxi driver take up gardening? He wanted to drive people around in a veggie-cab.
What did the taxi driver say to the annoying passenger? “Take a hike, I’ve already driven enough today.” .
Why was the taxi driver an excellent gardener? Because he always knew how to pick up fares!
What did the taxi say to the passenger who couldn’t decide where to go? “I’m just here for the ride, take your “fare” time!”
Why did the taxi driver have a pet snake in his cab? It helped him drive in the “hiss” lane!
Why was the taxi driver always a winner? Because he always had a fare chance!
Why did the taxi driver become a photographer? Because he wanted to capture every fare moment!
What did the taxi driver say to the raccoon crossing the road? “I hope you’re not fur-getting to pay the fare!”
Why did the taxi driver become a magician? He could always make his fares disappear!
I asked the taxi driver if he had change for a hundred-dollar bill. He replied, “I have a lot of cents of humor, but not that many actual cents.”
Why did the taxi driver quit his job? He couldn’t handle the fare-weather passengers!
Why did the taxi driver go to the gym? He wanted to stay in “fare” shape for those long drives!
I asked the taxi driver if he could take me to the airport. He said, “No problem, just let me land this taxi first!”
My taxi driver asked if I wanted a receipt. I said, “No thanks, I prefer to take a mental detaxation!”
Why did the taxi driver become an actor? He wanted to get into character before every fare!
What’s a taxi driver’s favorite song? “Take a Fare on Me” by ABBA!
Why did the taxi driver put his money in the blender? He wanted to make some liquid assets!
What’s a taxi driver’s favorite meal? Drive-thru!
Why did the taxi driver start a band? He wanted to be known as the driver of the “Tour Bus”!
Why did the taxi driver take up gardening? He heard it was a great way to grow some green fares!
Why was the taxi driver always happy? He had a fare-amount of joy in his life!
Why did the taxi driver bring a sandwich to work? They heard it was a good way to pick up extra bread!
What do you call a taxi driver who only takes dogs as passengers? A “woof” driver!
Why did the taxi driver become a chef? He loved making “fare”-cooked meals for his passengers!
Why was the taxi driver always happy? Because he knew all the shortcuts to happiness.
Why did the taxi driver become a chef? Because he heard he could make a lot of green with some extra drive-thru tips!
What do you call a taxi driver who never gets lost? A rare breed.
Why did the taxi driver refuse to pick up the ghost passenger? Because he didn’t want any BOOking problems!
Why did the taxi driver refuse to pick up the alien? Because he didn’t have any space in his car!
I told the taxi driver to take me to where the party’s at. He dropped me off at the IRS office.
Why did the taxi driver always carry a ruler? Because he wanted to measure his fares accurately.
What do you call a taxi that only accepts payment in fruit? A cab-ana!
What’s the most reliable way to find a taxi in the rain? Look for the one with wet tires!
Why did the taxi driver switch careers and become a detective? He wanted to “fare”well at solving mysteries on the streets!
Why did the taxi driver become a detective? He was tired of just driving, he wanted to solve “fare”-mysteries!
Why did the taxi driver only work on weekends? Because he wanted to make every day feel like a Friday night!
Why did the taxi driver become a musician? Because he wanted to give people a ride to the beat.
I once took a taxi and the driver asked me if I wanted a scenic route. I said, “Sure, let’s go through the drive-thru!”
Why did the taxi driver get a pet bird? So he could have a fare-feathered friend!
Why did the taxi driver refuse to let the geologist in his cab? Because he couldn’t “take” rocks for granite!
Why did the taxi driver get a degree in geography? Because he wanted to be well-rounded!
Why did the taxi driver keep a ladder in his car? In case he wanted to reach the high fares!
What do you call a taxi driver with no sense of direction? Lost in fares-lation!
I told the taxi driver to take me somewhere I’ve never been before, so he dropped me off at my ex’s house.
Why did the taxi driver carry a ladder? In case he wanted to reach a higher fare!
What did the taxi driver say when he found a $20 bill on the floor? “It’s my lucky fare!”
Why did the taxi driver always carry a map? Because he couldn’t resist steering in the wrong direction.
Why did the taxi driver bring a watermelon to work? In case he had to make a melon-dramatic stop!
Why did the taxi driver become a surgeon? He wanted to operate on fares… and his car’s engine!
What do you get when you cross a taxi driver with a lawyer? Someone who speeds up the legal process.
Why do taxi drivers never get angry? Because they always take things in their stride!
Why did the taxi driver have a pet parrot in the cab? He wanted a fare with some feathered entertainment!
I saw a taxi driver reading a book while driving. I guess you can call it “driving in the novel lane.”
Why did the taxi driver always have a can of soda in his cab? In case he needed a fizzy fare-ride!
I told the taxi driver I wanted to go somewhere exciting. He dropped me off at my ex’s house!
What did the taxi driver say to the passenger who asked for a discount? “Sorry, this isn’t a coupon-cab service!”
Why did the taxi driver get a parking ticket? He was going above and beyond to make his passengers happy.
What did the taxi driver say to the passenger who wanted to go to the moon? Buckle up, we’re in for a lunar ride!
Why did the taxi driver start a band? Because he wanted to pick up fares and beats at the same time!
What do you call a taxi that always needs a jump-start? A “cab-oose”!
Why did the taxi driver never get a promotion? Because he was always driven to distraction!
What do you call a taxi that only works during the day? A sun-cab!
Why did the taxi driver wear a belt? Because he wanted to hold his pants up while driving those tight corners!
Why did the taxi driver bring a deck of cards to work? In case he needed to cab-shuffle his fares!
Why did the taxi driver start a garden? He wanted to grow “fare-well” flowers for his passengers!
Why did the taxi driver go to the gym? They wanted to build some fare muscles!
Did you hear about the taxi driver who went on strike? He just parked his car and refused to pick up anyone but himself!
What do you call a taxi that’s running out of gas? A fumblin’ cab!
Why did the taxi driver bring a broom to work? Because he heard there would be a lot of sweepstakes!
Why did the taxi driver become a detective? Because he was always good at tracking down fares.
I asked the taxi driver if he could take me to the gym. He said, “Sure, sit in the back and watch me exercise my right foot!”
Why did the taxi driver start a band? Because he wanted to drop people off at the rhythm station.
Why was the taxi driver always looking in the rearview mirror? Because he wanted to see if he was being followed by another taxi!
Why did the taxi driver invite his passengers to a barbecue? Because he wanted to grill them with questions!
Why did the taxi driver get a nose job? Because he wanted a better profile!
Why do taxi drivers make terrible comedians? Because their jokes always go over the meter.
Why did the taxi driver start a fitness class? He wanted his passengers to get in “fare”-shape!
Why do taxi drivers make great DJs? They always know how to drop the beat… and their passengers!
Why did the taxi driver take a detour? He wanted to drive the passengers nuts!
Why did the taxi driver wear a life jacket? He wanted to be prepared for a “fare”-overboard situation!
What do you call a taxi that’s been converted into a vegetable garden? A cabbage cab!

Taxi Dad Jokes

Taxi dad jokes are a hilarious mix of humor and wit, guaranteed to induce groans and chuckles simultaneously.

They’re the epitome of jokes that are so cheesy, they’re actually funny.

Perfect for injecting a little fun into your car rides, dinner table banter, or even just to cheer up a friend, these jokes are always a hit.

Fasten your seatbelts and get ready for the laughter.

Here are some taxi dad jokes that will take you on a joyride:

Why did the taxi driver become a teacher? Because he had a knack for driving knowledge into his passengers!
Why did the taxi driver become a detective? He always knew how to crack the case… of the traffic jam!
Why did the taxi driver always have a bunch of pens in his car? Because he liked to draw attention to himself!
Why did the taxi driver never trust the ocean? Because it always waved for a ride but never paid!
Why did the taxi driver get a job as a chef? Because he wanted to make some extra fare!
Why did the taxi driver join a band? Because he wanted to drive the music industry crazy with his cab-a-riffic tunes!
Why did the taxi driver join a band? Because he had great rhythm and knew all the keys!
Why don’t taxi drivers ever get lonely? Because they always have someone to pick them up.
Why did the taxi driver bring a map to the movie theater? Because he wanted to make sure he didn’t miss any plot twists!
Why did the taxi driver take his car to the doctor? Because it had a bad case of “exhausted” pipes!
Why did the taxi driver go to the gym? Because he wanted to work on his cab-solutely fabulous physique!
Why did the taxi driver become an astronaut? He wanted to take people on out-of-this-world rides!
What do you call a taxi that’s full of lawyers? A lawsuit-cab!
Why do taxi drivers make terrible comedians? Because their jokes always “drive” people crazy!
Why did the taxi driver wear a helmet while driving? In case he had to pick up some crash-ews!
What do you call a taxi that’s been underwater? A sub-urban cab!
Why did the taxi driver always keep a map of the city in his glove compartment? So he could always navigate by the seat of his pants!
What did the taxi driver say when he saw a group of clowns waiting for a ride? “I hope they don’t try to squeeze into my car!”
Why did the taxi driver have a successful career change? He was tired of driving people crazy!
Why did the taxi driver go to school? Because he wanted to improve his driving knowledge and earn a fare education!
Why did the taxi driver always carry a pen and paper? Because he liked to jot down fares!
Why did the taxi driver refuse to pick up the ghost? Because he was afraid of paranormal fares!
Why was the taxi driver always calm? Because he knew how to steer clear of road rage!
Why did the taxi driver prefer driving at night? Because he enjoyed giving “night lights” to his passengers.
Why did the taxi driver become a musician? Because he liked giving his passengers a “melodic” experience during their ride.
Why was the taxi driver an excellent detective? He could always crack a case… or just his window!
Why did the taxi driver become a doctor? Because he believed in giving his passengers a “fare” shot at good health!
Why did the taxi driver get a pet parrot? To help him navigate through heavy traffic with his squawk-assistant!
Why did the taxi driver ask for a second job as a baker? Because he loved giving “dough-nuts” to his passengers!
Why did the taxi driver start wearing sunglasses? He wanted to be a “driving” force of style!
Why did the taxi driver become a comedian? Because he wanted to give his fares a good laugh along the ride!
Why do taxi drivers make terrible magicians? Because they always disappear when you need them the most!
Why did the taxi driver go to therapy? Because he was tired of driving people crazy.
Why did the taxi driver become an actor? He wanted to take the wheel of fortune!
Why did the taxi driver wear headphones while driving? Because he wanted to listen to some fare-ocious tunes!
Why did the taxi driver always carry a dictionary? So he could always define his fare share!
Why did the taxi driver keep a toothbrush in his cab? Because he heard you should always brush up on your routes.
What do you call a taxi that only serves desserts? A pie-cab!
Why did the taxi driver always carry a dictionary? Because he wanted to define what it means to be a wheel-y great driver!
Why did the taxi driver keep a hot dog in his pocket? In case he got hungry during a traffic jam!
Why did the taxi driver get a good night’s sleep? Because he found a fare to dream about.
Why did the taxi driver become a tour guide? Because he loved taking people on a ride through history and landmarks.
Why did the taxi driver give up on becoming a comedian? Because his jokes always drove people away!
Why did the taxi driver go to the baseball game? Because he heard they were giving away free rides!
Why do taxi drivers never get lost? Because they always follow the fare-est route.
Why did the taxi driver get a parking ticket? Because he couldn’t curb his enthusiasm!
What do you call a taxi that’s never on time? A procrasticab!
Why did the taxi driver never make it as a singer? Because he could never find the right “pitch” on the road!
Why don’t taxis ever get lost? Because they always know the way around the fare-est city!
Why did the taxi driver become a musician? Because he knew all the best routes to the concert hall!
Why did the taxi driver love his job? He could always pick people up!
Why did the taxi driver refuse to pick up the scarecrow? Because he was outstanding in his field!
Why did the taxi driver get a job as a chef? Because he knew how to whip up a tasty fare!
Why was the taxi driver a great singer? Because he always hit the high notes when honking!
What do you call a taxi that wants to become a doctor? A taxi-cologist!
Why did the taxi driver start a garden in his cab? So he could have a fare-planting experience!
What did one taxi say to the other taxi? “I’m driving you crazy!”
Why did the taxi driver become a chef? He wanted to serve up some fare-licious meals on wheels!
Why did the taxi driver bring a broom on the job? To sweep away any bad fares!
Why did the taxi driver become a chef? Because he always knew the fastest way to deliver food!
Why did the taxi driver always have a snack in the car? In case he got stuck in a traffic jam!
Why did the taxi driver take a day off? He needed a brake!
Why did the taxi driver become a chef? Because he wanted to make some fare-y tasty meals.
Why did the taxi driver take his pet parrot to work? Because it always reminded him to “take the next left”!
Why did the taxi driver refuse to pick up the mathematician? Because he refused to take any “odd” fares!
Why did the taxi driver take a suitcase full of candy on his shift? In case he needed some fare trade!
Why did the taxi driver go to therapy? Because he had too many passengers who were “backseat drivers”!
Why do taxi drivers always carry a map? In case they get driven to distraction!
Why did the taxi driver get a job at the zoo? Because he was great at lion up the animals!
Why did the taxi driver always carry a calculator? So he could calculate the fare and sum it up!
Why did the taxi driver go to acting school? He wanted to learn how to give the best curb-side performances!
Why did the taxi driver become a teacher? He wanted to educate his passengers about the streets!
Why don’t taxis ever get into accidents? Because they always steer clear!
Why did the taxi driver carry a map in his pocket? In case he wanted to take a fare-mergency exit!
Why did the taxi driver take a break from driving? Because he needed to recharge his battery!
What do you call a taxi that only travels in reverse? A cab-backwards!
Why did the taxi driver start a garden? Because he wanted to grow fare and square.
Why did the taxi driver become a baseball coach? Because he knew how to get to first base… and second base… and third base!
Why did the taxi driver become a teacher? Because he wanted to show his fares the ropes!
Why did the taxi driver always carry a map? Because he wanted to steer clear of any wrong turns!
Why did the taxi driver bring a map to the wedding? In case he had to give someone directions to the chapel!
Why did the taxi break up with his girlfriend? She was just too fare away.
What do you call a taxi driver who only takes payment in fruit? A cherry-o-cab!
Why did the taxi driver become a detective? Because he always knew how to track down the best routes!
What do you call a taxi that only picks up dogs? A “ruff” ride service!
Why did the taxi driver become a wedding planner? He knew how to “drive” people to their happily ever after!
How do you know when a taxi is in love? It always gets meter-motional!
Why did the taxi driver have a successful career in comedy? Because he always knew how to drive people to laughter.
What do you call a taxi that’s always in a hurry? A “fast” cab!
What did the taxi driver say when he found out he won the lottery? “I’m going to cab-belize in my fortune!”
Why did the taxi driver become a librarian? Because he loved getting people lost in good stories!
Why did the taxi driver keep a toothbrush in his glove compartment? In case he had to brush up on his fare knowledge!
What did the taxi driver say to the passenger who asked for a ride to the bakery? “Donut worry, I’ll take you there in a jiffy!”
Why did the taxi driver take up boxing? Because he wanted to be known for his knockout fares!
Why did the taxi driver start dating his cab? Because he heard it was a good way to pick up fares.
Why did the tomato turn red after getting into a taxi? It saw the meter running!
Why did the taxi driver bring a pillow to work? Because he wanted to cushion the blow when he hit traffic!
Why did the taxi driver get a degree in math? Because he was great at calculating taxi fares!
Why did the taxi driver always carry a calculator? Because he knew how to count on his fares!
Why did the taxi driver get a good grade in math? Because he knew all the routes!
Why do taxi drivers always carry a map? Because they never want to be at a loss for direction!
Why did the taxi driver become a pilot? Because he wanted to take his passengers to new heights!
Why did the taxi driver become a gardener? Because he enjoyed driving people around the “green” areas of the city.
Why did the taxi driver bring a map to the party? Because he wanted to show everyone the route to a good time!
What did one taxi say to the other? “I’ll drive, you can take a backseat.”
Why did the taxi driver start a gardening business? Because he loved to pick up fares and plant them in the ground!
Why did the taxi driver only take a small piece of pizza? Because he didn’t want to get too car-bloaded!
Why did the taxi driver bring a broom to work? Because he wanted to sweep people off their feet with his service!
Why did the taxi driver always have a box of tissues in the car? In case his passengers needed to catch a cab-bie!
Why did the taxi driver refuse to pick up the math teacher? Because he heard the teacher was always trying to divide and conquer.
Why did the taxi driver get a second job as a chef? Because he always knows the quickest way to takeout!
Why did the taxi driver get a job at the zoo? He heard there were lots of fares there!
Why did the taxi driver become a doctor? Because he could always diagnose traffic congestion!
What do you call a taxi that only transports livestock? A moo-ber!
Why did the taxi driver start a gardening business? He wanted to help people grow their own taxi-cabs!
Why don’t taxi drivers need to take driving tests? Because they always seem to be driven to succeed!
Why did the taxi driver get a lot of speeding tickets? Because he was always driven to go the extra mile!
Why did the taxi driver always have a spare tire? Because he liked to keep things rolling smoothly!
What did the taxi driver say to the dog in his cab? “Sit and fetch your fare!”
Why was the taxi driver always so calm? Because he knew how to keep his fares cool!
Why did the taxi driver always carry a map? Because he liked to steer in the right direction!
Why did the taxi driver get a pet parrot? It could always help him navigate the streets!
Why did the taxi driver become a gardener? Because he wanted to work on his green thumb meter.
What did the taxi driver say to the wolf? Take a “lyft” instead!
Why did the taxi driver start a band? He wanted to drive people wild with his music!
Why did the taxi driver become an actor? Because he loved playing the fare in every scene!
What did the taxi say to the passenger who couldn’t find their wallet? “Don’t worry, I’ll charge it to your Uber account!”
Why did the taxi driver always carry a pencil and paper? Because he was good at sketchy situations!
What did the taxi driver say to the passenger who didn’t buckle up? “Hang on, it’s going to be a bumpy fare!”
Why did the taxi driver always carry a map? Because he didn’t want to get lost in fare-ign territory!
Why do taxi drivers make great comedians? Because they always know how to drive their passengers to laughter!
Why did the taxi driver go on vacation? He needed a break from all the meter madness!
Why do taxi drivers love to sing while driving? Because they have excellent car-eoke skills!
What did the passenger say to the taxi driver who couldn’t find the way? “I guess we’re taking the scenic route!”
Why did the taxi driver take up gardening? Because he wanted to grow his fare share of green thumbs!
Why did the taxi driver refuse to give the ghost a ride? Because it had no “body” to pay!

Taxi Jokes for Kids

Taxi jokes for kids are like the zippy racecars of the humor world—quick, exciting, and always delivering a fun time.

These jokes inspire kids to explore the delight of puns and wordplay, encouraging an appreciation for humor that’s as swift and dynamic as a taxi ride through the city.

Moreover, taxi jokes for kids have the bonus effect of making travel and urban life amusing, transforming that yellow vehicle whizzing by into a source of endless giggles.

Ready for a laughter-filled journey?

Buckle up!

Here are the jokes that’ll have them chuckling at every traffic light:

Why do taxis never get married? They prefer to remain car-bachelors!
Why did the taxi driver bring a map to bed? So he could dream of new routes!
Why did the taxi driver get a good grade in math? Because he could always count on his fare!
Why did the taxi bring a pillow to work? So its passengers could take a cab nap!
What do you call a taxi that keeps losing its way? A cab without direction!
What did the taxi driver say when the passenger asked if he could keep a dog in the cab? “Sure, but it’s going to be a “ruff” ride!”
Why did the taxi driver always keep a toothbrush in his cab? Because he liked to take the passengers for a ride!
How do you know a taxi driver is good at math? He knows all the fare angles!
Why did the taxi driver never get a parking ticket? Because he always kept an eye out for the meter maid!
Why did the taxi driver become a boxer? Because he was always up for a fare fight!
Why did the taxi driver never win at poker? Because he always had a bad “cab”it!
How do you find a lost taxi? Use a tax-i-dermist!
Why did the taxi driver sit on the clock? Because he wanted to drive a time machine!
What do you call a taxi that is always on time? Dependable-cab!
What do you call a taxi driver who doesn’t know how to drive? A gopher!
What did the passenger say to the taxi driver who was driving too slow? “Can you please lettuce hurry up?”
Why did the taxi driver go to school? To improve his driving skills!
Why did the taxi driver keep a bar of soap in his car? Because he liked “clean” driving!
Why did the taxi driver go to school? To pick up his passengers’ high fares!
Why did the taxi driver always carry a map? In case he needed to take a shortcut to the punchline!
Why did the taxi driver become an artist? Because he wanted to draw the line between destinations!
Why did the taxi driver always carry a map? Because he had a terrible sense of direction!
Why did the taxi go to the bank? To get some “change” for his fares!
What did the taxi driver say to the passenger who wanted a long ride? “You’re in for a “fare” treat!”
Why did the taxi driver give a ghost a ride? Because it was a fare-phantom experience!
Why did the taxi driver take a nap in the park? Because he wanted to meter down!
Why did the taxi driver become a doctor? Because he knew how to give his patients a good “pick up”!
Why did the taxi driver keep a mirror in his cab? So he could see “fare” and square!
Why do taxi drivers never get a traffic ticket? Because they always take the fare way!
Why did the taxi driver become a teacher? Because he liked giving people directions!
What kind of taxi do witches use? Broomstick cabs!
Why did the taxi driver become a magician? Because he could always “cab-bra-cadabra” a fare out of thin air!
Why did the taxi driver keep a mattress in his car? Because he liked to catch Zzz’s on the go!
What did the taxi say to the passenger who didn’t want to pay the fare? “You better “cab” it up!”
Why did the taxi driver get a diploma? Because he was outstanding in his field!
What did the taxi driver say to the lion? “Just hop in the back, I’ll give you a “roar”ing ride!”
Why did the taxi driver become a chef? Because he knew how to drive people nuts with his delicious jokes!
Why did the taxi driver keep a mirror in the car? So passengers could reflect on their journey!
Why did the taxi driver bring a ladder to work? In case he had to pick up some high-flying customers!
What did the taxi driver say to the wolf? Hop in and let’s go for a “howl” ride!
What do you call a taxi that tells jokes? A funny-cab!
Why did the taxi driver get a good report card? Because he always stayed in the right lane!
Why did the taxi driver get a black eye? Because he drove straight into a traffic jam!
Why did the taxi driver go to acting school? Because he wanted to play a “driver” role!
Why did the taxi driver become a comedian? Because he loved giving people a “fare” laugh!
What did one taxi say to the other taxi? Take the shortcut, it’s cab-ulous!
Why was the taxi driver so good at math? Because he knew how to count his mileage!
Why did the taxi driver get a traffic ticket? Because he was always taking the “long” way!
What do you get when you cross a taxi and a police car? A car that offers a “fare” share of justice!
What do you call a taxi that only picks up vegetables? A ‘cab’-bage patch car!
Why did the taxi driver become a librarian? Because he loved to read the road!
What do you get when you cross a taxi with a bicycle? A cab-i-cab-i-cab!
Why did the taxi driver wear a belt? Because he wanted to be a “cab”-le driver!
Why did the taxi driver become a doctor? Because he wanted to take people’s temperatures with his “farenheit”!
Why did the taxi driver invite his friends to the car wash? Because he wanted to have a “fare”well party!
What’s the best day for a taxi to get a tan? Sun-day!
Why did the taxi driver always have an umbrella? In case it “hailed”!
Why did the taxi driver go to space? He wanted to give the aliens a fare share of Earth’s beauty!
Why did the taxi driver get a promotion? Because he always took the right route to success!
What did the taxi say to the passenger who didn’t have enough money? Sorry, meter’s running!
Why did the taxi bring a spoon? Because it wanted to eat up the competition!
What do you call a taxi that can fly? A cab-helicopter!
Why did the taxi driver take a nap during the day? He wanted to ‘dream’ up some new routes!
What do you call a taxi that can swim? A ‘sub’-urban cab!
Why don’t taxi drivers ever get angry? Because they always go with the flow!
Why did the taxi driver go to the dentist? Because he needed a “fare” cleaning!
Why did the taxi go to space? It wanted to take a rocket trip!
What did the taxi driver say to the wolf? “Hurry up, the meter is “running”!”
Why did the taxi driver keep a toothbrush in his cab? Because he wanted to take a brush with traffic!
What’s a taxi driver’s favorite song? “I Will Drive 500 Miles!” by The Proclaimers!
Why did the taxi driver bring a ladder in the car? In case they needed a fare “higher” up!
Why did the taxi driver become a teacher? Because he wanted to pick up some extra “cabbage”!
What did the traffic light say to the taxi driver? “Don’t stop, keep “green”!”
What do you get if you cross a taxi with a bakery? A “fare”ycake!
Why did the taxi driver carry a spoon with him? In case he wanted to “fork” the road!
What do you call a taxi that keeps singing while driving? A “karaoke cab”!
What did the taxi driver say to the lost ghost? “Don’t worry, I’ll drive you to your boo destination!”
Why did the taxi driver put a bed in his car? So he could take people for a “ride” and a nap at the same time!
Why was the taxi sad? Because it had too many farewells!
What did one taxi say to the other taxi? I’ll race you to the next stoplight!
Why did the taxi take a detour through the park? Because it wanted to ‘drive’ the ducks quackers!
Why did the taxi driver get a new car? Because he wanted to take it for a spin!
Why did the taxi driver always have a lot of friends? Because he was good at “picking up” people!
What do you call a taxi that won’t stop talking? A “chatter-cab!”
Why did the taxi driver go to jail? He couldn’t make a quick getaway from the punchline police!
Why did the taxi driver only travel at night? Because he wanted to be a knight rider!
What do you call a taxi driver who only eats breakfast? A cereal cabbie!
Why did the taxi driver always carry a map? Because he wanted to be on the right track!
What did the taxi driver say to the wolf? “Don’t worry, I’m a good driver, I won’t wolf down the road!”
Why did the taxi driver go to space? Because he wanted to explore the “fare” reaches of the universe!
Why did the taxi driver go to the library? Because he wanted to catch up on some road maps!
Why did the taxi driver start a band? Because he had a great sense of car-rhythm!
Why was the taxi driver not good at math? Because he could never find the right fare!
What did the taxi driver say to the wolf? “Fur-st come, fur-st served!”
What do you call a taxi that needs gas? A cab that’s running on fumes!
Why did the taxi driver take a nap? He wanted to dream of fares!
Why did the taxi stop playing music? Because it ran out of “Fare-ohs”!
Why did the taxi driver sit on the clock? Because he wanted to be on time for all his fares!
Why did the taxi driver go to space? To pick up some aliens for a fare!
What do you call a taxi that gets a speeding ticket? A “speed cab”!
Why did the taxi driver go to space? Because he wanted to pick up some “star” passengers!
Why did the taxi driver have a sore throat? Because he was always calling out the fares!
Why did the taxi driver become a baseball player? Because he loved driving home runs!
How do you make a taxi float? Put it in the water and wait for the meter to go up!
Why did the taxi go to therapy? It had too many fares!
Why did the taxi driver only take cash? Because he couldn’t handle change!
Why do taxi drivers make terrible comedians? Because their jokes always take a wrong turn!
Why did the taxi driver paint his cab with stripes? So he could easily spot it in the “traffic-jungle”!
What do you get when you cross a taxi and a boat? A cab-in cruiser!
What did one taxi say to the other taxi? “I’ve got the ‘drive’ to succeed!”
Why did the taxi driver get a ticket? Because he was parked on the wrong side of the celery!
Why did the taxi take a break? It was tired of all the traffic jam!
What did the taxi say to the police car? “I’ve been driving you crazy all night!”
Why did the taxi driver bring a ladder in the car? So he could take people to “high-way” destinations!
What did one taxi say to the other taxi? “I’ve got a fare feeling about today!”
Why did the taxi driver get a ticket? Because he couldn’t stop driving on the express lane!
Why did the taxi driver go to jail? Because he was over the limit! (the speed limit).
Why did the taxi driver always carry a toothbrush? Because he wanted to “brush up” on his driving skills!
What did the taxi driver say to the police officer? “I cab-solutely did not do anything wrong!”
Why did the taxi driver get a ticket at the library? Because he refused to return his audible books on time!
Why was the taxi driver running late? He got caught up in a traffic jam-boree!
What did the taxi driver say to the passenger who didn’t have exact change? “Don’t worry, I have plenty of drive-ohs!”
Why did the taxi driver always have an umbrella in his car? In case it started “raining cats and fare-dogs”!
Why did the taxi driver get a pet snake? So he could drive in the car-pool lane!
Why did the taxi go to the bank? Because it needed some change!
Why did the taxi driver start singing on the road? Because he wanted to give his passengers a melodious ride!
What do you call a taxi driver who only travels during the day? A sun-driver!
Why did the taxi driver always have spare change? Because he was always a few cents-ible!
How do you know if a taxi is shy? It has a little cab-ashful!
What did the traffic light say to the taxi? Don’t look, I’m about to change!
What do you call a taxi that gets into an accident? A cab-crash!
Why did the taxi driver refuse to pick up the mushroom? Because he didn’t want to fuel a fungi in his car!
Why did the taxi driver become a chef? Because he loved giving people a lift (in their spirits) and food!
What do you call a taxi that likes to race? A speed cab!

Taxi Jokes for Adults

Who says adults can’t enjoy a good taxi joke?

Taxi jokes for adults combine the intricacies of urban life with a splash of wit and a hint of mischief.

Just like navigating through a bustling city, these jokes offer unexpected turns, surprising punchlines, and a delightful journey of humor.

From the backseat banter to the quirky encounters with cab drivers, these jokes capture the essence of taxi rides and transform them into moments of laughter.

These jokes are perfect for cocktail parties, social gatherings, or simply to inject some humor into an otherwise routine conversation.

Here are some taxi jokes that are perfect for adults:

Why did the taxi driver get a good deal on a car? He knew all the shortcuts!
Why did the taxi driver break up with her boyfriend? He was always giving her the wrong directions!
Why did the taxi driver always carry a pencil and paper? He wanted to take notes on his clients’ destinations!
What do you call a taxi that’s been converted into a boat? A “cabbie”-n cruiser!
Why did the taxi driver keep a toothbrush in his glove compartment? He always wanted to have a clean getaway!
What do you call a taxi driver who only gives bad directions? A misleading cab!
Why did the taxi driver refuse to pick up the math teacher? Because she always made him feel divided!
Why did the taxi driver start a band? Because he wanted to hit the road and tour!
What do you call a taxi driver who only picks up dogs? A bark cab!
Why did the passenger give the taxi driver a high rating? Because he didn’t charge an ‘arm’ and a leg!
What did the taxi driver say to the passenger who kept going in circles? “I guess we’re going on a round-trip!”
What did the taxi driver say to the passenger who kept complaining about the fares? “Take a hike!”
Why do taxi drivers make terrible mathematicians? They always struggle with fare calculations!
Why was the taxi driver always so calm? Because he had a fare-therapeutic personality!
Why did the taxi driver start a garden on the roof of his cab? He wanted to grow some fare-mergency greens!
What do you call a taxi that constantly breaks down? A cab-reakdown!
Why did the taxi driver always have a lot of change? Because he was always trying to ‘coin’ a profit!
Why did the taxi driver get into an argument with the passenger? They couldn’t agree on the route cause!
What do you call a taxi driver who loves to fish? A “catch-a-cab” angler!
Why did the taxi driver keep a deck of cards in his cab? He liked to give his passengers a “fare” deal by playing a game of poker!
Why did the taxi driver get fired? He couldn’t stop metering around!
Why do taxi drivers never get bored? They always have a fare share of stories to tell!
Why did the taxi driver refuse to pick up the scientist? He didn’t want to get into a “fare” debate!
Why did the taxi driver bring a ladder into his cab? Because he wanted to reach new “heights” in his job!
Why did the taxi driver become a detective? He wanted to solve the mystery of traffic jams!
Why was the taxi driver a terrible stand-up comedian? He always missed his punchlines and drove away too soon!
Why did the taxi driver always carry a map? Because he liked to navigate the streets of humor!
What’s the difference between a taxi driver and a football player? The taxi driver knows how to drop you off at your destination!
Why did the taxi driver get into a fight with a bicycle? The bicycle kept pedaling in the wrong lane!
Why did the taxi driver wear a hat with a mini garden on top? So his passengers could enjoy a rooftop fare-den!
Why did the taxi driver go to the dentist? Because he heard there was a ‘fare’ amount of cavities in the area!
Why did the taxi driver become a therapist? Because he was great at listening to people’s “fare” share of problems!
Why did the taxi driver win an award? He always took the fare-est route!
Why did the taxi driver refuse to drive the clown? He was tired of all the “car-nival” jokes!
Why was the taxi driver so good at math? Because he knew all the angles to make quick turns!
Why did the taxi driver get kicked out of the library? Because he refused to “shhh” the meter!
What did the taxi driver say to the wolf? “Fur get about it! I don’t pick up hitchhikers!”
Why did the taxi driver bring a ladder to work? Because she heard she needed to raise the roof!
What did the passenger say to the taxi driver who was driving too fast? “Slow down! I’m not in a hurry to meet my destiny!”
Why did the taxi driver bring a ladder in his cab? In case someone wanted a “higher” fare!
Why did the taxi driver get arrested? He took his passengers for a ride!
Why did the taxi driver get into a fight with his GPS? It kept telling him to take the wrong turns!
Why do taxi drivers make great comedians? They always have the best “cab”-stories!
Why did the taxi driver become a politician? He wanted to drive change in the transportation system!
What did the taxi driver say to the passenger who couldn’t decide where to go? “Take your time, I’ve got a fare share of patience!”
Why did the taxi driver refuse to pick up the mathematician? He said he couldn’t handle the square roots!
Why did the taxi driver become an artist? Because he was tired of just driving people around – he wanted to draw them crazy!
Why did the taxi driver become a stand-up comedian? Because he always knew how to ‘drive’ the crowd wild with laughter!
Why did the taxi driver become an artist? He wanted to paint the town red, yellow, and green!
Why did the taxi driver become a firefighter? Because he loved extinguishing high fares!
Why don’t taxis ever get married? They always prefer to remain single fare!
Why did the taxi driver never get promoted? He couldn’t drive his career in the right direction!
Why did the taxi driver start singing in the middle of the ride? He wanted to give his passengers a fare-aoke experience!
Why did the taxi driver become a chef? He wanted to have a fare-licious career change!
Why did the taxi driver refuse to pick up the mathematician? He didn’t want any square roots in his cab!
Why did the taxi driver get a promotion? Because he always drove his boss to drink!
What do you call a taxi that’s gone bad? A “cab”-baged vehicle!
Why did the passenger tip the taxi driver with a potato? Because he heard he was a “chip” driver!
What do you call a taxi that breaks the law? A cab-ber!
Why did the taxi driver get a ticket? He wasn’t steering his conversation!
Why did the taxi driver get a ticket? He couldn’t stop picking up fares!
Why did the taxi driver always carry a pillow? So he could take fares to dreamland!
Why did the taxi driver start a gardening business? He wanted to put the pedal to the petunias!
Why don’t taxi drivers ever get lonely? Because they have so many fare-ends!
Why do taxi drivers make good comedians? Because they always have a “fare” share of jokes!
Why did the taxi driver never win any races? Because he always had too many “fare” passengers!
Why did the taxi driver become an actor? Because he loved playing different roles and driving a “cab”!
Why did the taxi driver start a band? Because he wanted to give his passengers a “fare” share of entertainment!
Why did the taxi driver take up gardening? Because he wanted to drive home the point that he had a green thumb!
What did the passenger say to the taxi driver who was going too fast? “Slow down, I’m in a hurry to pay more for this ride!”
Why did the taxi driver start a band? He wanted to make some “fare-ly” good music on the road!
Why did the taxi driver refuse to go near the zoo? He heard it was a ‘bear’ to find parking!
Why did the taxi driver refuse to go to the dentist? He was afraid of fare-y tales!
Why did the taxi driver never invest in the stock market? Because he always preferred a sure fare!
Why did the taxi driver become a stand-up comedian? Because he realized he was driving everyone to laughter already!
Why did the taxi driver become a gardener? He wanted to grow his taxi-dermy business on the side!
Why did the taxi driver keep a baseball bat in his car? In case he needed to “bunt” away any unruly passengers!
What do you call a taxi that’s gone bankrupt? A cab-ocalypse!
Why did the taxi driver become an actor? He loved putting on a show, even if it was just driving people around!
What do you call a taxi that only accepts attractive passengers? A good-looking cab!
Why did the taxi driver refuse to take the passenger who wanted to go to the zoo? He was afraid of a lion in the backseat!
Why did the taxi driver become a chef? He wanted to drive people nuts with his special “traffic jam” recipe!
Why did the taxi driver always carry a toothbrush? In case he picked up a fare who needed a quick ‘brush’ into the airport!
Why was the taxi driver so good at solving puzzles? Because he could always find the right fare way!
Why did the taxi driver have a successful career? He knew how to pick up and drop off!
Why did the taxi driver always carry a pillow in his car? So his passengers could have a “smooth” ride!
Why did the taxi driver refuse to pick up the customer wearing a chicken costume? He didn’t want to “fowl” up his backseat!
Why did the taxi driver get in trouble with the law? He was always driving on the wrong side of the fare!
What did the passenger say to the taxi driver who was driving too fast? “Slow down, buddy! I want to arrive at my destination, not in another dimension!”
What did the taxi driver say to the passenger who couldn’t decide on a destination? “Don’t worry, I’ll just take you around the block until you make up your mind!”
Why did the taxi driver become a chef? He wanted to “drive” food right to people’s doors!
Why did the taxi driver become a professional boxer? He wanted to knock out the competition!
What did the taxi driver say to the passenger who wanted to go to the bank? “Are you sure? I can drive you to bankruptcy for free!”
Why did the taxi driver refuse to pick up the mathematician? He said he wouldn’t take any fare in fractions!
Why do taxi drivers never get lonely? They always have fares to keep them company!
Why was the taxi driver so successful? Because he always took the fare-est route!
Why did the taxi driver refuse to give a ride to the mathematician? Because he couldn’t “count” on him!
Why did the taxi driver become a chef? Because he was tired of driving people around and wanted to put some ‘fare’ on the table!
Why did the taxi driver refuse to give a ride to the circus performers? He didn’t want to pick up any fare-ly odd people!
Why did the taxi driver become a yoga instructor? He wanted to help people find their inner “cabbalance”!
Why do taxi drivers never get bored on the job? Because they always have a “fare” share of interesting passengers!
Why did the taxi driver always carry a dictionary? In case he needed to define a fare-weather friend!
What did one taxi say to the other when they were stuck in traffic? “Looks like we’re going nowhere fast!”
Why did the taxi driver keep a violin in his cab? He enjoyed giving his passengers a “fare” performance!
Why did the taxi driver give a discount to the passenger who was always late? He believed in a fare-ly forgiveness policy!
What do you call a taxi driver who moonlights as a comedian? A cab-aret artist!
Why did the taxi driver keep a mattress in his car? For all the passengers who wanted a “cabbie nap”!
Why did the taxi driver refuse to pick up the astronaut? He didn’t want any spaced-out fares!
Why don’t taxi drivers ever get married? Because they’re always driving away from the “altar”!
Why did the taxi driver get into the music business? He wanted to become a cab-aret singer!
Why did the taxi driver carry a map? In case he needed to ‘fare’-navigatethe way to a new location!
What did the taxi driver say to the passenger who couldn’t decide on a destination? “Don’t worry, we’ll get there eventually. We’re on a fare-way to heaven!”
Why was the taxi driver always so generous with his fares? He believed in a cab-munity!
What do you call a taxi driver who only drives at night? A “night cabbie” owl!
What do you call a taxi that’s lost its mind? A cab-bernet!
Why was the taxi driver so successful? He always went the extra fare!
Why do taxi drivers never get bored? They always have someone to “drive” them crazy!
Why did the taxi driver get a promotion? Because he always went the extra mile!
What’s a taxi driver’s favorite kind of music? Car tunes!
Why did the taxi driver get a ticket for jaywalking? He crossed the road to pick up a fare!
Why did the taxi driver refuse to pick up the mathematician? He said it was against his “fare” policy!
What do you call a taxi driver who only works on weekends? A part-time cabbie!
Why did the taxi driver become an artist? He loved “painting” the town red with his passengers!
Why did the taxi driver never get angry? Because he always kept his cab cool!
What do you call a taxi driver who doesn’t wash their car? A dirty driver!
Why did the taxi driver become a dentist? He wanted to fill the gap between fares!
What did the taxi driver say to the rude passenger? “Take a seat, I’m the driver, not your therapist!”
Why did the taxi driver become a wedding planner? He was great at driving people to the altar on time!
Why did the taxi driver get a ticket for speeding? Because he was “cab”-solutely in a hurry!
Why did the taxi driver refuse to pick up the superhero? He had a strict “no capes” policy!
Why did the taxi driver start a gardening business? He wanted to make some extra green on the side!
Why did the taxi driver give a discount to the mathematician? He didn’t want to deal with the fare square!
Why did the taxi driver carry a broom? He was a “sweepstakes” winner!
What did the taxi driver say to the passenger who couldn’t decide? “Take your time, I’ll just meter here!”
Why did the taxi driver get kicked out of the comedy club? His jokes were always a bit “cab”-surd!
Why did the taxi driver refuse to pick up the mathematician? He said, “Sorry, but I can’t handle your odd problems!”
Why did the taxi driver get a degree in mathematics? He wanted to learn how to count his money faster!
Why did the taxi driver get in trouble with the law? He always had a lead foot on the gas pedal!
Why did the taxi driver become a chef? He wanted to make a living “driving” people crazy with his delicious food!
Why did the taxi driver start carrying a dictionary with him? He wanted to define the meaning of fare-ness!
What do you call a taxi driver who moonlights as a chef? A “drive-thru” professional!
Why did the taxi driver always carry an extra pair of pants? In case they had to make a quick cab-wardrobe change!
What do you call a taxi that keeps breaking the speed limit? A “Fleet” of foot!
Why do taxi drivers make bad comedians? Their jokes always go over your head!
Why did the taxi driver get a pet snake? He wanted a fare-ocious companion in his cab!
Why did the taxi driver bring a ladder to work? So he could reach those high “fares”!
What did the taxi say to the passenger who didn’t pay? “You’re not going anywhere without cash cab!”
Why did the taxi driver get a speeding ticket? He was trying to make some fast cash!
What’s a taxi driver’s favorite type of dance? The fare-well!
Why did the taxi driver always carry a piece of string? In case he needed to tie up his loose cab-les!
What did the taxi driver say to the passenger who couldn’t pay the fare? “Sorry, but it’s time to hit the road!”
Why do taxi drivers make great detectives? They always have the fare facts!
Why do taxi drivers make great storytellers? They always have a fare-y tale to tell!

Taxi Joke Generator

Navigating the lane of humor can sometimes be as confusing as a bustling city’s traffic.

Did you notice the little pun there?

That’s where our FREE Taxi Joke Generator comes in to direct your giggles.

Engineered to combine snappy puns, driving humor, and playful wordplay, it creates jokes that are assured to spark laughter and ignite amusement.

Don’t let your humor get lost in the traffic of mundane jokes.

Use our joke generator to deliver jokes that are as sharp and entertaining as the quickest taxi ride through the city.

FAQs About Taxi Jokes

Why are taxi jokes so popular?

Taxi jokes have a universal appeal as taxis are used by people worldwide.

They often draw on shared experiences and situations that can be funny, frustrating, or just plain strange.

These jokes are relatable, entertaining, and a light-hearted way to poke fun at everyday experiences.

Can taxi jokes help in social situations?

Certainly!

Jokes are always a great way to break the ice and taxi jokes, with their broad appeal and commonplace contexts, can bring humor to almost any social situation.

How can I come up with my own taxi jokes?

Think about typical taxi scenarios – late arrivals, strange passengers, talkative drivers, unusual routes, etc.
Use taxi-related vocabulary (e.g., fare, meter, tip). Look for puns or interesting phrases involving these words.
Consider the setting of your joke. Is it happening in the taxi, at the taxi stand, or involving a taxi in an unexpected situation? Match your humor to this context.
Twist a well-known saying or phrase to include taxi elements.
Don’t shy away from puns and wordplay. Taxi jokes offer a wide avenue for linguistic fun and games!