491 Zombie Jokes That Will Resurrect Your Humor

If you’re here, it means you’re ready to bite into the world of zombie jokes.

Not just any jokes, but the most infectious ones.

That’s why we’ve dug up a list of the most hilariously morbid zombie jokes.

From brain-eating puns to undead one-liners, our compilation has a joke for every apocalypse survivor.

So, let’s stagger into the chilling world of zombie humor, one joke at a time.

Contents show

Zombie Jokes

Zombie jokes are a delightful blend of horror and humor that can tickle your funny bone and send a chill down your spine at the same time.

They aren’t just about the undead creatures but also the apocalypse genre that’s been a staple in pop culture.

From their relentless pursuit of brains to their peculiarly slow walk, zombies provide plenty of comedic material.

Creating the perfect zombie joke involves playing with common tropes, surprising your audience, and the often grim, yet amusing, characteristics of zombies themselves (their lack of speed, inability to reason, or their insatiable appetite for brains).

Ready to laugh until you drop…dead?

Unearth hilarity with these zombie jokes:

What’s a zombie’s favorite shampoo? Head and shoulders… and knees… and toes…
How did the zombie ask his crush out? He said, “I’d love to take a bite out of you… I mean, take you out to dinner.”
Why did the zombie join the gym? He wanted to get into better grave shape.
Why did the zombie start a business? He wanted to rake in the grave profits!
How do zombies stay organized? They use a corpse planner!
What do you call a zombie with a lot of friends? Popular… in the afterlife!
What do you call a zombie that can dance? Michael Jack-son of the Dead!
What do you call a zombie that tells jokes? The “fun-ghoul” of the party!
What did the zombie say to his friend at the party? “I’m dead tired!”
How do you kill a vegetarian zombie? With a zucchini to the head.
What did the zombie say to the pizza delivery guy? “Keep the change, I already ate the last guy who came here.”
What do zombies eat at BBQs? Spare ribs.
What is a zombie’s favorite workout? Dead-lifts.
Why don’t zombies ever win arguments? Because they’re always dead wrong!
Why did the zombie lose the race? Because he was running on dead legs.
Why don’t zombies like fast food? Because they can’t catch it!
Why do zombies make terrible athletes? Because they always “lose” their heads in the game!
Why did the zombie start a gardening business? Because he wanted to “reap” what he sowed!
How do you stop a zombie from smelling? You hold its nose!
What did the zombie say to the comedian? “You’re killing me!”
What do you call a zombie that’s always in a good mood? A jolly ghoul.
Why don’t zombies like malls? They can’t resist the “bargain” sales!
What did one zombie say to the other while eating a comedian’s brain? “This tastes funny.” .
Why did the zombie break up with his girlfriend? He just didn’t find her “brrrr-ains” attractive anymore!
Why did the zombie start a band? Because it wanted to devour some sick beats.
What did one zombie say to the other at the party? “It’s dead in here.” .
Why did the zombie start a fight? He wanted to kick some “ghoul” butt!
How do zombies get around? They use the sub-terranean.
What do you call a zombie with a broken leg and a bad memory? Dead and forgotten.
Why don’t zombies go to parties? Because they have no body to dance with!
What do zombies eat at the movie theater? The brains behind the concession stand.
Why did the zombie start a band? He wanted to be a drummer with a killer beat.
Why did the zombie go to the dentist? To improve his “gore-geous” smile!
Why did the zombie go to school? To get a little “brain” food!
What do you call a zombie that’s always on time? A corpse with a watch.
What do you call a zombie that won’t leave you alone? A dead weight.
What do you call a zombie with a six-pack? An abdominal ghoul.
What do you call a zombie who loves to party? A dead-icated dancer.
Why did the zombie start a band? He wanted to become a drummer and eat the bass player.
How do zombies prefer their eggs? Brain-ded.
What did the zombie say when he found brains for dinner? It’s a no-brainer!
Why did the zombie become a chef? He wanted to learn how to grill brains.
Why did the zombie start a band? He heard it was all about the drums.
Why did the zombie join a gym? He wanted to beef up his brain muscles.
What did the zombie say to his date? “I’m dead serious about you!”
Why did the zombie skip school? He felt a little “brain-dead” in the morning!
Why don’t zombies eat popcorn with their fingers? They prefer to eat the fingers separately!
How does a zombie ask someone out? “Wanna grab a bite?”
Why did the zombie become a musician? He wanted to “rock” the undead world!
What did the zombie get when he went to the dentist? A plaque-que!
Why don’t zombies go to church? Because they have no soul!
What did the zombie say to the lazy person? “I find your lack of braaaaaains disturbing!”
What did the zombie say to the pizza delivery guy? “Keep the change, just give me your brains!”
Why don’t zombies go to school? They already know all the answers… their brains are just a little rotten.
Why do zombies make terrible librarians? They can never find their bookmarks.
What do you call a zombie who cooks stir-fry? Dead and vegetables.
What did the zombie say to his date? I think I’m falling head over heels for you… literally.
What’s a zombie’s favorite kind of bean? Human beans.

Short Zombie Jokes

Short zombie jokes are the perfect humorous antidote to a spooky, scary night.

They are the epitome of ‘dead funny’, providing a quick chuckle to shake off the dread.

These jokes are perfect for Halloween party ice-breakers, quirky text messages, or social media captions during the spooky season.

The charm of short zombie jokes lies in their ability to be not only eerie but also hilariously entertaining, delivering a chuckle with a dash of fright in just a few words.

Now, brace yourself!

Here are short zombie jokes that will have you laughing your guts out in no time.

How does a zombie greet his friends? “Nice to eat you!”
Why don’t zombies like fast food? They can only catch slow food!
Why don’t zombies ever fight? They are dead serious!
How does a zombie write? With a DEAD-ication!
Why don’t zombies make good comedians? They always drop dead!
What do you call a zombie who cooks gourmet meals? A gourmand-ibal!
How do zombies celebrate Valentine’s Day? They give “heart”felt bites!
What do you call a fashionable zombie? A gore-geous dresser!
How do zombies celebrate Valentine’s Day? They give each other heartache!
What’s a zombie’s favorite dessert? I scream and die!
What is a zombie’s favorite dance move? The brain-dead shuffle!
What do you call a zombie who won’t fight? A pacifist-rot!
What’s a zombie’s favorite meal? Brain stew!
Why do zombies make terrible actors? They’re always stumbling over their lines!
What do you call a group of zombies playing poker? The undead-lounge!
Why do zombies make terrible librarians? They can’t stop saying “Braaaaaains!”
What is a zombie’s favorite type of movie? A rom-zom-com!
Why did the zombie start taking vitamins? To improve his deadlift!
How do zombies get around? They drive dead-end cars.
What do zombies wear to parties? Formal dead-wear!
What do you call a zombie with no legs? Lieutenant Deadweight!
Why do zombies make terrible chefs? They always “brain”storm their recipes!
What’s a zombie’s favorite kind of pasta? Brains-eloni!
What’s a zombie’s favorite kind of sandwich? A ham-bieger!
What did the zombie eat after his workout? Exercised brains!
Why did the zombie go to the party? To have some BRAAAINS!
What’s a zombie’s favorite exercise? The corpse-a-cise!
Why do zombies always win at poker? They have great poker faces!
What did the zombie say when he won an award? I’m dead-icated!
Why don’t zombies like to fight? They prefer a good “brainstorm”!
How does a zombie start a letter? “Tomb it may concern…”
Why did the zombie go to the party? For the graveyard shift!
Why did the zombie join the circus? He wanted to juggle brains.
Why did the zombie get promoted? He was an excellent grave-digger!

Zombie Jokes One-Liners

One-liner zombie jokes are the epitome of humor, distilled into one bite-sized sentence.

They’re the comedic equivalent of a zombie’s single-minded pursuit – relentless, surprising, and wickedly entertaining.

Constructing a great one-liner demands a fusion of originality, timing, and a profound appreciation for the craft of puns and wordplay.

The challenge lies in entwining the setup and punchline in one short burst, delivering maximum laughter with minimal words.

Here’s to these zombie one-liners infecting you with waves of hilarity:

Why did the zombie always fail his exams? Because he always had “grave” errors!
Why did the zombie join a gym? It wanted some fresh meat.
Why did the zombie become a dentist? It wanted to feast on tooth decay.
I told my friend I’ll always have his back, even if it’s falling off and trying to eat me.
What did the zombie say after eating a comedian? “That guy really killed it!”
I asked a zombie if he wanted a piece of gum and he replied, “I’m already chewing on someone’s brains.”
Why did the zombie start a fashion line? It wanted to show off its decaying style.
What do you call a zombie who loves taking selfies? A deadication addict.
Why did the zombie go to the comedy club? It wanted to eat some funny bones.
Why did the zombie go to college? To get his “de-gree”!
Why did the zombie enroll in cooking class? To learn how to make finger food!
Why did the zombie go to the party? Because he wanted some brains to pick!
I thought I saw a zombie wearing a name tag, but it turned out to be a reflection in a mirror.
What do you call a zombie who cooks stir fry? Deadpan fried rice.
Why was the zombie always on time for work? He had an “undying” commitment to punctuality.
My zombie neighbor’s garden is always thriving, thanks to all the “deadication” he puts into it.
What’s a zombie’s favorite type of bread? Scream cheese.
I tried to make friends with a zombie, but it just wanted to eat my brains instead. Talk about a one-track mind!
What do you call a zombie with a good sense of humor? A “dead”pan comedian!
Why don’t zombies ever fight over a piece of candy? They prefer brains over sweet treats!
What do zombies eat for breakfast? Grrrrr-aaaaains!
Why don’t zombies fight in wars? They prefer a “laid-back” approach!
Why don’t zombies make good friends? They’re always a bit brain-dead!
Why did the zombie apply to work at the bakery? He wanted to earn some dough.
My zombie friend always complains about having a hard time making new friends. I guess people find his personality a bit draining.
Why did the zombie start a band? It wanted to eat the drumsticks.
I saw a zombie walking down the street wearing a shirt that said, “Eat More Brains.” Talk about having a bold fashion statement!
Why did the zombie go to the amusement park? He wanted to ride the “roller-ghoster”
Why did the zombie bring a spoon to the cemetery? He heard the graveyards were full of dead ends.
Why don’t zombies ever go on vacation? They’re afraid they’ll relax and decompose!
What do you call a zombie who wins an Olympic gold medal? A dead-lifter.
I asked a zombie if it wanted a piece of gum. It said, “No thanks, I’ve already got a chewing problem.”
How do zombies celebrate Valentine’s Day? They give their heart away.
Why did the zombie enroll in school? It wanted to improve its mindless-ness.
Why did the zombie buy new running shoes? He wanted to improve his brain speed.
Why did the zombie refuse to eat the comedian? He thought he was a funny bone!
What do you call a zombie who won’t stop talking? A “chatterbox of the undead”!
Why did the zombie go broke? He didn’t know how to “make a killing” in the stock market.
I told a zombie a joke and it took him three days to get it. Talk about a slow response time!
What did the zombie say to his friend? “I find you a-MAZE-ing, even if I have no braaaaains.”
I tried to scare a zombie, but it just gave me a deadpan look.
Why did the zombie go to the dentist? He wanted a little bite of floss.
Did you hear about the zombie that joined a gym? He’s deadlifting now!
What did the zombie say when he got a job as a chef? “I finally found a way to bring out my inner organ-izer!”
Why don’t zombies get invited to parties? Because they’re dead bored.
Why did the zombie become a stand-up comedian? He could always get a good reaction from the crowd… even if it was just screams!
What’s a zombie’s favorite part of a joke? The dead-pan delivery!
Why did the zombie start a podcast? Because he wanted to talk about his favorite dead-ications!
Why don’t zombies ever get caught? They’re always two steps ahead… and a few limbs behind.
What do you call a zombie who takes up yoga? A dead-ication to corpse pose.
Why did the zombie bring a ladder to the party? To raise the dead!
Why do zombies make terrible chefs? They always “loose their heads” while cooking!
Why did the zombie become a stand-up comedian? He wanted to share his deadpan humor!
Why did the zombie start a band? Because he had an axe to grind!
What’s a zombie’s favorite type of exercise? Dead-lifts, of course!
Why did the zombie go to the doctor? Because he had a bad case of the “walkers!”
What do you call a zombie who can’t stop singing? A “gore-eoke” enthusiast.
Why did the zombie refuse to play cards? He was afraid of losing his heart… or what’s left of it!
Why did the zombie break up with his girlfriend? She just couldn’t handle his “deadication”
Why did the zombie go to the party? Because he heard it was a dead good time!
Why did the zombie take up photography? He wanted to capture the “un-dead” moments!
Why don’t zombies go to school? They are already deaducated.
Why did the zombie go to the party? He heard there would be lots of “brain” food!
What did the zombie say to the bartender? “I’ll have a shot… of brains!”
I asked the zombie if he wanted some brain food, and he said, “No thanks, I’m on a no-brains diet!”
Why don’t zombies play cards in the wild? Because there are too many “cheetahs”!
What did the zombie say to his friend during a race? “I’m dead last!”
Why did the zombie go to the gym? To get some fresh brains!
Why don’t zombies ever get invited to parties? They have a tendency to “lose their heads”!
How did the zombie ask his crush out? He said, “I’d love to eat your brains out sometime!”
Why did the zombie cross the road? To eat the brains on the other side!
Why did the zombie become a magician? It wanted to make brains disappear!
What do you call a zombie who enters a talent show? A deadication!
What do you call a zombie who works in a library? A “dead”icated bookworm!
Why did the zombie eat his homework? He wanted a “brain” food snack!
What’s a zombie’s favorite dance move? The “grapevine” (because they love brains!).
Why did the zombie become a chef? It wanted to specialize in finger foods.
What do you call a zombie who can sing? A “tomb-tone” deaf vocalist!
Why did the zombie become a dentist? He loved to “extract” teeth!
What do you call a zombie who can’t keep a secret? A blabber-mouth.
Why did the zombie get a job at the bakery? He kneaded a fresh “braaaains”!
What do you call a zombie that plays pranks? A “dead” joker!
Why did the zombie join a fitness club? He wanted to “work on his core” (and eat some brains).
I asked a zombie for directions, but all he said was, “Braaaains!”
Zombies don’t understand why they always get invited to Halloween parties, but never to dinner parties.
Why don’t zombies use smartphones? They’re afraid of getting a virus!
What do you call a zombie who won’t stop complaining? A “grumble”bee!
Why do zombies never get promoted? They always have a dead-end job!
Why did the zombie walk out of the horror movie? He found it too humerus.
Why did the zombie refuse to play cards? He didn’t want to “show his hand”!
Why did the zombie start a band? He wanted to “corpse” around with his friends!
What do you call a zombie who is a good dancer? A human boogie.
What’s a zombie’s favorite kind of music? Soul music, of course!
Why did the zombie start a band? He wanted to play some decomposing music.
I used to be a zombie, but I got tired of being dead on my feet.
Why did the zombie join the army? He wanted to serve his country, and brains!
Why did the zombie always lose at poker? He had a hard time “holding” onto his cards.
What’s a zombie’s favorite type of music? “Decomposing” beats.
Did you hear about the zombie who opened a bakery? His specialty was “grave-y” pastries!
What do you call a group of zombies playing instruments? A deadly band.
Why did the zombie only eat vegetarian brains? He wanted a no-meat diet!
Why did the zombie go on a diet? He heard it was a great way to lose a few extra limbs!
What do you call a zombie with a PhD? Doctor Doom-and-Gloom!
Why did the zombie become a chef? Because he loved adding a touch of grave-y to his dishes!
What do you call a zombie who can’t remember anything? An “empty-headed” ghoul.
What did the zombie say when it saw a human running? “Aah, fast food!”
Why did the zombie refuse to eat the dentist? He wanted to keep his fang-cy smile intact.
What do you call a zombie who likes to travel? A globe-trotting undead!

Zombie Dad Jokes

Zombie dad jokes are the spooktacular blend of humor and the undead that will make you groan with laughter.

They are the type of jokes that are so terribly horrifying, they’re hilariously good.

Perfect for Halloween parties, scary movie nights, or even for a light-hearted apocalypse-themed gathering, these jokes are sure to tickle your funny bone.

So, be ready for the moans and groans.

Here are some zombie dad jokes that are sure to make you die laughing:

Why did the zombie take up gardening? He wanted to raise some rotten tomatoes!
Why don’t zombies like rain? It dampens their spirits!
Why did the zombie join the army? He wanted to learn some discipline, one bite at a time!
What did the zombie say when he lost his job? “I guess I’m just dying to find a new career!”
Why did the zombie join the basketball team? It wanted to be a “slam-dunk”!
What did the zombie say to his friend who was late for dinner? “Don’t worry, I’ll just have a snack while I wait.” .
What do you call a zombie who’s good at basketball? A “slam-dunk”!
Why don’t zombies get married? They always have cold feet!
Why did the zombie start a business? It wanted to become a “grave” entrepreneur!
What do you call a zombie who likes to bake? A gingerdead man.
Why did the zombie go to the art gallery? He heard there was a lot of “gruesome” artwork on display!
What do you call a zombie with a great sense of humor? The life of the party… even if he’s technically dead.
What did the zombie say when he got a promotion? “I’m deadicated to my work!”
What did the zombie say after winning a race? “I’m dead last!”
What do you call a group of zombie musicians? A “dead” band!
Why did the zombie go to the gym? He wanted to get some body parts.
Why did the zombie go to school? To improve his mind-munching abilities!
Why did the zombie become a chef? He loved cooking up new brains!
Why don’t zombies ever get invited to dinner parties? They always bring an undead friend.
How does a zombie like his coffee? With a lot of scream and sugar!
Why don’t zombies go to the gym? Because they already have killer bodies!
What do you call a zombie who won’t share his food? A grouch-ombie!
Why was the zombie always in debt? He couldn’t resist the temptation of buying “body” snacks.
What is a zombie’s favorite part of a book? The spine-chilling ending!
How do zombies travel? They use the “dead” end roads, of course!
Why did the zombie go to the art gallery? To see the dead-iculous paintings.
What did the zombie say to his date? I just can’t get you out of my head… literally!
Why did the zombie start a band? He heard they had a great “gore” sound!
Why was the zombie a terrible writer? Because his stories always had a dead end.
How do zombies learn new things? They download knowledge directly into their brains!
Why don’t zombies like shopping? Because they’re afraid of the price “tags”!
How do zombies make friends? They just “hang out” and wait for them to turn!
What is a zombie’s favorite type of exercise? Zomboot camp!
Why did the zombie go broke? He kept buying dead-ications for his ailments.
What do you call a zombie with a broken leg and a hearing aid? Anything you want, it can’t chase you!
Why did the zombie get promoted at work? He had a lot of “braaains”!
What did the zombie say to his friend at the party? “I could just eat you up!”
Why did the zombie go to the party alone? Because they wanted to have a graveyard smash!
Why do zombies make great comedians? Because they always have killer jokes!
Why did the zombie start a gardening business? He wanted to grow his own food, literally!
Why did the zombie start a band? He wanted to rock ‘n’ roll all night and bite brains every day!
Why don’t zombies eat brains on a diet? They prefer low-calorie meals!
Why did the zombie start gardening? Because he wanted to plant some “grave-yards”!
Why did the zombie start a band? He wanted to get a little “deadication” to his music.
What did the zombie say to his date? Can I pick your brain?
Why did the zombie start eating cereal? He wanted some brain food to start the day.
Why did the zombie join the gym? To work on his core and cardio-deadvascular health!
What do you call a group of zombies performing a synchronized dance? The “Thriller” squad!
What do you call a zombie with a nice car? A corpse with a Porsche.
How do zombies get around? On a bone-afide!
Why did the zombie join the gym? He wanted to work on his core, specifically his brain!
Why did the zombie go to the dentist? Because he wanted a new set of gnashers.
What did the zombie say to the other zombie at the party? “I’m dying to eat some brains!”
Why did the zombie start a band? Because it had a killer sense of rhythm!
What do you call a zombie who can juggle? A decom-pose-ian!
What do you call a zombie with no body and no nose? Nobody knows!
Why did the zombie join the gym? He wanted to lose some weight, literally.
Why don’t zombies ever win in a race? Because they are always dead tired.
Why did the zombie start a gardening business? Because he had a green thumb (and a rotting one too)!
What did the zombie say to his date? “I hope you’re not a heartbreaker, because my heart is already dead.” .
How did the zombie ask his crush out on a date? He said, “Can I pick your brain?”
What did the zombie say to his date? “I just can’t stop “gobblin” you up!”
Why did the zombie apply for a job at the bakery? He wanted to make some dough…brains!
What did the zombie say when it won the lottery? I’m dead lucky!
What did the zombie say to the fast food worker? Can I have some brains with that?
Why did the zombie join the circus? He wanted to try his “hand” at juggling brains!
Why did the zombie always fail his exams? He had a real brain drain.
Why are zombies so calm? Because nothing gets under their skin.
What did the zombie say to his son? “Stop acting like a snack and start acting like a meal!”
How do zombies invite their friends over? They send a “deadication” card!
Why did the zombie join a gym? He wanted to get more “dead”icated to his fitness.
Why don’t zombies ever enjoy eating clowns? Because they taste funny.
What do vegetarian zombies eat? Grrrraaaaaiiiinnnnss!
What do you call a zombie with a broken leg and one arm? “Disabled” and dangerous!
Why do zombies make terrible comedians? Because their jokes always “fall flat”
Why don’t zombies ever fight over anything? Because they share the same “grave”yard!
Why did the zombie go to the theater? He wanted to see a “dead” good movie.
Why don’t zombies fight in wars? They’re always losing their heads!
What do you call a zombie with a broken leg and a split lip? A monster mash-up!
Why did the zombie go to the gym? He wanted to improve his corpse strength!
Why did the zombie go to the dentist? He needed a little “gore” correction.
What did one zombie say to the other when they found a brain? “Is it fresh enough to eat or is it mind-numbingly stale?”
What did the zombie say to his date? I love every bone in your body… especially mine!
What did the zombie say to his friend? “You’re always a good shoulder to chew on.” .
Why don’t zombies ever get married? Because they always want a “dead”icated relationship.
What did the zombie say to his friend? “I’ve got a bone to pick with you!”
How do zombies listen to music? They use their Zomb-ears!
Why did the zombie become a chef? Because he loved “finger food”!
Why did the zombie start a band? He heard they always needed a good “drummer”!
What do you call a group of zombies playing a game? A “horde” of gamers!
Why did the zombie take up gardening? He wanted to plant some brains and grow a “think” tank.
Why did the zombie get kicked out of the library? He kept returning the “dead” books!
How did the zombie know the weather forecast? He read it in the “brain” newspaper!
What do you call a group of zombies playing a card game? A dead man’s hand!
What did the zombie say to his friend? I’m dying to meat you!
Why did the zombie become a comedian? Because it wanted to tickle people’s funny bones!
What did the zombie say to his date? “I just love a woman with brains… literally!”
Why did the zombie take up photography? He wanted to develop some good “dead” shots.
Why don’t zombies ever get married? Because they are afraid of “till death do us part”!

Zombie Jokes for Kids

Zombie jokes for kids are like the goofy goblins of the comedy realm – harmless, entertaining, and always landing a laugh with the young ones.

These jokes encourage children to explore humor and mystery, nurturing a fascination for storytelling that’s as thrilling as the subject matter itself.

Moreover, zombie jokes for kids have the unique advantage of making scary themes approachable and fun, transforming those eerie creatures of the night into a source of amusement.

Ready for some spine-tingling laughter?

Here are the jokes that’ll have them giggling amidst their goosebumps:

What did the zombie say to the magician? You have some great sleight of decay!
Why did the zombie go to school? Because he heard it was a place full of brains!
What does a zombie get when it is late for dinner? The cold shoulder!
What do you call a zombie that likes to wear turtlenecks? A neckromancer.
What do you call a zombie with a sweet tooth? A sugar fiend!
What’s a zombie’s favorite book? Romeo and Ghouliet.
How do zombies stay fit? They do a lot of corpse-ercise!
What do you call a zombie who is good at cooking? A gour-morgue chef.
Why did the zombie go to school? To learn more about brain food!
Why don’t zombies make good comedians? Because their jokes are always rotten!
How did the zombie comedian make everyone laugh? He had killer jokes.
What is a zombie’s favorite kind of music? Dismembering beats.
Why don’t zombies ever go to school? Because they already have plenty of brains!
What do you call a zombie that got a job at the bakery? A bread-undead!
Why did the zombie eat all the gummy worms? Because they were finger-licking good!
What do zombies do on the beach? They surf the web.
What do zombies do on a beach vacation? They chill out and eat some sand-wiches.
Why did the zombie join a gym? He wanted to get in shape (instead of just falling apart)!
What do you call a zombie with a cold? A “sneeze”ing zombie!
What did the zombie say to his friend at the party? “I love hanging out with you, it’s always a dead good time.”
Why don’t zombies like fast food? Because they can never “catch up” with their meals!
How did the zombie know it was time for dinner? The dinner bell rang – and so did its stomach!
What do you call a zombie with a broken leg and a cold? An “Achey Breaky Sniff Sniff!”.
Why did the zombie always carry a pencil and paper? In case he needed to “draw” blood!
How did the zombie start his letter? “Tomb it may concern…”
What is a zombie’s favorite dessert? I-Scream!
What did the zombie say to his friend at the gym? I’m deadlifting again today, it’s leg day after all.
Why don’t zombies play baseball? They can’t find their “brains”!
What do you call a zombie who takes up gardening? A plant-eater!
Why did the zombie go to the doctor? Because it was feeling a little rotten!
What do you call a zombie with a broken leg and one arm? Trust me, you don’t want to call him anything!
Why did the zombie go to school? Because he wanted to learn a “braaains” new skill!
How did the zombie know it was raining? He could feel it in his bones!
What do you call a zombie who takes up gardening? The “garden of the living dead”!
Why don’t zombies fight each other? They don’t have the guts!
Why did the zombie take a bath? Because he wanted to “wake up” his dead skin!
Why did the zombie go to the supermarket? He wanted to get a “finger food” snack!
How do zombies say hello? They give you a “ghoul” wave!
What did the zombie say to the dentist? “Do you mind if I pick your brains?”
What do you call a zombie that can dance? A boogie man!
What do you call a zombie who tells funny jokes? The laugh of the living dead!
How do zombies stay in shape? They exercise their graveyards!
Why did the zombie skip lunch? He was already stuffed.
What did the zombie do at the party? He had a graveyard smash!
Why don’t zombies ever stop working? Because they’re always dead-ticated!
What did the zombie say to the ice cream man? Keep the change, I’ll just take the cone.
What do zombies use to fix their hair? A dread-lock!
What did the zombie say to the vampire? You suck, literally!
Why did the zombie become a chef? Because he wanted to “stir up” some brains!
How do zombies eat their popcorn? With their dead-icated hands!
What did the zombie do when he found a brain on the ground? He picked it up and said, “This is a no-brainer!”
Why did the zombie bring a ladder to the library? Because he wanted to check out some books from the top shelf!
Why did the zombie go to the doctor? Because he wasn’t “feeling himself”!
Why did the zombie go to the bakery? He wanted some “brain” muffins!
How do zombies eat their food? With grave-y!
What did the zombie say to his friend at the graveyard? “I’m dead serious about being friends!”
What’s a zombie’s favorite dessert? Brain-freeze!
What is a zombie’s favorite snack? A finger sandwich!
How do zombies travel? By dead-ication!
Why did the zombie join a gym? He wanted to get a little body back into his life.
What is a zombie’s favorite cereal? Rice Creepies!
What does a zombie vegetarian eat? “Grrrrrrrrrr-ains!”
What do you call a zombie that lost his way? A dead-end!
Why did the zombie skip school? He felt rotten.
What did the zombie say after being told a joke? “I’m dying of laughter!”
What do you call a zombie who wins a race? The dead-ication champion!
What is a zombie’s favorite breakfast? Brains and eggs!
Why did the zombie become a detective? He always had a “grave” sense of curiosity!
Why don’t zombies like to go swimming? They’re afraid they’ll turn into Dead Sea creatures!
What’s a zombie’s favorite toy? A dead-y bear.
What did the zombie say when he saw his friend? “You’re a sight for dead eyes!”
What did the zombie say to his friend? “I love hanging out with you, you make me feel alive… well, sort of!”
What is a zombie’s favorite breakfast? Ghost cereal with boo-berries!
What do zombies eat at the movies? Popcorn and “chews”!
Why don’t zombies go on roller coasters? They already have enough “dead” excitement!
What do you call a zombie who can play the guitar? “Slash”er!
Why did the zombie start a band? Because he wanted to “rock the graveyard”!
Why did the zombie start a band? Because he had some killer music skills!
Why don’t zombies play baseball? They’re afraid of the bats!
What do zombies do before a big race? They “warm up” their brains!
What did one zombie say to the other at the Halloween party? I just love a good “boooo”-ty!
How do zombies keep their breath fresh? They use mints from the graveyard!
What do you call a zombie that farts? A deadicated gas!
How did the zombie fix his hair? With a grave-yard brush.
What did the zombie say when he won the game? “I’m dying to tell everyone!”

Zombie Jokes for Adults

Who says adults can’t enjoy a good zombie joke?

Zombie jokes for adults take humor to the next level, mixing matured wit with a hint of macabre.

Just like a thrilling zombie apocalypse movie, these jokes marry elements of humor, intellect, and a sprinkle of gore for an unforgettable laugh.

These jokes are perfect for Halloween parties, horror movie nights, or simply to bring a dash of excitement into a regular conversation among friends.

Here are some zombie jokes that are dead right for adults:

What do you call a zombie who joined a rock band? The “lead” singer!
What’s a zombie’s favorite snack? “Ghoul Scout” cookies!
What did the zombie say to the musician? “I love your dead beats!”
Why did the zombie go to the comedy club? To get a few laughs… and brains!
Why don’t zombies ever enjoy road trips? They always prefer a nice walk!
What did the zombie say to the vampire at the party? “You suck, but I’m dead on my feet!”
Why did the zombie become a vegetarian? He didn’t have the stomach for meat!
Why did the zombie get a job at the morgue? He wanted to work his “graveyard” shift!
What did the zombie say to the bartender? Can I have a drink with a little bite?
How does a zombie like his coffee? Decaf-inated!
What do you get if you cross a zombie with a computer virus? A deadly byte!
Why did the zombie go to the music concert? He wanted to hear some “dead” metal!
Why did the zombie join a gym? To work on its body and lose a few extra limbs!
What is a zombie’s favorite dance move? The Thriller, of course!
What do you call a zombie with a shiny personality? A “Glow-in-the-Dark” undead!
Why did the zombie become a stand-up comedian? Because he wanted to “kill” it on stage!
What do zombies use to style their hair? A “dead”icated hairstylist!
Why did the zombie join a gym? To build some muscle for chasing brains!
Why do zombies make terrible painters? They can never “draw” themselves away from brains!
Why don’t zombies ever get married? Because they are always dead-set against it!
What did the zombie say to the monster at the Halloween party? “You look “booooooooo”-tiful!”
What do you call a zombie who works in a bakery? A gingerdead man!
Why did the zombie break up with his girlfriend? She didn’t have enough brains for him!
Why don’t zombies like shopping? They always lose their receipts!
Why did the zombie join the gym? He wanted to eat people who were in shape!
Why don’t zombies make good chefs? They always have a taste for brains!
How do zombies eat their food? They “gobble” it down!
How did the zombie ask for a favor? Can you lend me a hand?
What did the zombie say when it came across a group of tourists? “Mmm… brains on a holiday!”
What did the zombie say to the judge in court? “I’m dying to be acquitted!”
Why did the zombie go to the therapist? Because he was “losing” his mind!
Why did the zombie go to the doctor? He was feeling a bit “under the weather”!
How did the zombie ask his crush out? He finally worked up the guts!
Why don’t zombies get married? Because they always have “body” issues!
What did the zombie say when he found out he won the lottery? “I’m dying to get my hands on that cash!”
Why don’t zombies ever argue? They don’t like having a “brain”storm!
Why don’t zombies ever get married? They are afraid of being left at the altar…literally!
Why do zombies make terrible librarians? They can’t stop groaning when they see the bookworms!
How did the zombie ask for a date? “Do you mind if I chew on your arm for a while?”
Why did the zombie go to the party alone? He couldn’t find anyone he could sink his teeth into!
Why was the zombie always the life of the party? Because he had a killer sense of humor!
What did the zombie say to his friend? “I just want to eat your brain… with some fava beans and a nice Chianti!” – a classic Hannibal Lecter reference!
What do you call a zombie who tells good jokes? A deadpan comedian!
Why did the zombie start taking up yoga? He wanted to improve his body’s rigor mortis!
Why did the zombie start a band? It wanted to become a drummer and beat the brains out of its opponents!
Why do zombies make great librarians? They’re always eager to get their hands on new books!
What do you call a zombie that eats brains and loves to play golf? A “dead stroke”!
Why don’t zombies ever get invited to parties? They always bring down the “mood”!
What do you get when you cross a zombie and a snowman? Frostbite that never ends!
Why do zombies make terrible librarians? They can never keep their books in order, they always go for the brains first!
What did the zombie say to the lazy person? You’re dead to me!
Why don’t zombies eat comedians? They can’t handle funny bones!
What do you call a zombie that works at a bakery? A “dead”-icated pastry chef!
Why did the zombie become a comedian? He always had a knack for “deadpan” humor!
What do you call a zombie who lost his mind? A “brain-less” creature!
Why did the zombie go to the party alone? He couldn’t find anyone with brains to go with him!
Why did the zombie refuse to go on a diet? He said, “I’m already dead, what’s the point?”
Why did the zombie go to the dentist? It wanted a tooth extraction… and maybe a bite to eat!
What’s a zombie’s favorite party game? Musical Gravestones!
What do you get if you cross a zombie and a vampire? A “dead”ly combination!
Why did the zombie apply for a job at the bakery? He wanted to work with the bread (and not eat the customers)!
Why don’t zombies go to the beach? They can’t handle the sand-whiches!
What do you call a zombie with a nice personality? A dead-complimentary!
Why did the zombie take up gardening? He heard it was a grave hobby!
Why did the zombie start a band? Because he had a lot of “guts” to show off!
How did the zombie comedian die? He just couldn’t stop coughing up blood!
How do zombies prefer their coffee? Decoffinated and with a side of brains!
What is a zombie’s favorite board game? Operation!
What do you call a zombie who opens a bakery? A bread-undead!
What do you call a zombie with a car accident? A “fender-biter”!
Why did the zombie become a DJ? He loved playing music that made people drop dead on the dance floor!
Why don’t zombies like going to parties? They’re afraid of getting a little too grave!
What do you call a zombie who loves fast food? A “dead”icated fan!
What did one zombie say to the other at the party? “Nice to meat you!”
What do you call a zombie who wins an award? A “dead”icated individual!
What did the zombie say to his friend after a long day of chasing humans? “I’m dead tired!”
What do you call a zombie that lies on the beach all day? A sand-witch!
What did the zombie say to the mailman? “Keep up the good job, I always appreciate fresh deliveries!”
Why did the zombie skip school? He wanted to eat a “smart” brain for breakfast!
What do you call a zombie with a great sense of style? A “fashion”ably undead!
Why did the zombie join the gym? It wanted to lose a few limbs!
Why did the zombie join a gym? He wanted to get “fit” for his next brain feast!
Why do zombies make terrible comedians? They always have a deadpan expression!
Why did the zombie go to school? He wanted to learn how to put his brain to good use!
Why did the zombie break up with its girlfriend? She just wasn’t his type; he preferred someone with a little more “braaaains”!
What’s a zombie’s favorite type of dance? The “Thriller” of course!
Why did the zombie become a stand-up comedian? Because he had a killer sense of humor!
How do zombies know when it’s time for dinner? When the dinner bell tolls, their taste buds come alive!
What do you call a zombie that can’t stop dancing? The “boogie man”!
How do zombies say hello to each other? They give a dead-ication!
Why don’t zombies ever run in a marathon? They are always dead last!
What do you call a zombie that has passed his driving test? A corpse-cab!
Why did the zombie start studying astrology? He wanted to know if he was a Virgo or a Very-Dead!
Why did the zombie go to the dentist? It had a bad case of decayed breath!
Why do zombies make terrible chefs? They can’t help but add a bit of their own flavor!
How do zombies prefer their eggs? Braind over easy!
Why did the zombie bring a ladder to the bar? Because he heard the drinks were “on the house”!
What did the zombie say to his friend? “I love you for your brains… and your personality!”
How do zombies get around? On the deadway!
Why don’t zombies like shopping malls? They are afraid of the prices!
What did one zombie say to the other when they were eating a comedian? “This guy is a real funny bone!”
Why did the zombie go to the art gallery? He wanted to brush up on his “still” life skills!

Zombie Joke Generator

Cracking a hilarious zombie joke can sometimes feel like you’re walking among the dead.

(Caught that one, didn’t you?)

That’s where our FREE Zombie Joke Generator comes in to bring your humor back to life.

Constructed to blend witty puns, grave humor, and playful phrases, it creates jokes that are guaranteed to inject laughter into any conversation.

Don’t let your humor decompose and turn dull.

Use our joke generator to create jokes that are as lively and entertaining as a zombie apocalypse can be.

FAQs About Zombie Jokes

Why are zombie jokes so popular?

Zombie jokes are popular because they tap into a cultural fascination with the undead and the horror genre.

They offer a fun, light-hearted way to engage with a subject that is traditionally scary, allowing people to laugh at the absurdity of a zombie apocalypse.

Can zombie jokes help in social situations?

Indeed!

Zombie jokes can serve as a great icebreaker, especially among those who love all things related to horror and the supernatural.

They can lighten up the atmosphere, inject some humor into a conversation and help you connect with fellow zombie enthusiasts.

How can I come up with my own zombie jokes?

Understand the common characteristics of zombies—their slow movement, their craving for brains, their inability to die, etc.
Zombies have unique phrases associated with them (e.g., undead, apocalypse, walker). Use these words to create funny contexts or plays on words.
Consider the setting of your joke. A graveyard? An abandoned city? Tailor your humor to fit into this setting.
Adapt well-known sayings or phrases to include a zombie twist.
Don’t be afraid to utilize puns and wordplay. Zombie jokes are perfect for this type of humor!

Are there any tips for remembering zombie jokes?

Pair your zombie jokes with situations or contexts where they might be applicable—like during a horror movie marathon, a Halloween party, or when reading a zombie comic.

Associating the jokes with these circumstances can make them easier to remember.

How can I make my zombie jokes better?

The trick lies in the unexpected.

Establish a common ground with your audience, incorporate an element of surprise, and don’t hesitate to play with words.

Practice is key, so keep testing your jokes to see what garners the most laughter.

How does the Zombie Joke Generator work?

Our Zombie Joke Generator is your go-to source for instant fun.

Just input keywords related to your zombie-themed humor or situation, and click the Generate Jokes button.

Within seconds, you’ll have a selection of hilarious zombie jokes ready to share.

Is the Zombie Joke Generator free?

Absolutely, our Zombie Joke Generator is completely free to use!

Generate as many jokes as you desire to keep your content fresh and entertaining.

Feel free to fill your social media feeds with humor as infectious as a zombie virus.

Conclusion

Zombie jokes are a spook-tacular way to inject a little fun into everyday conversations, making life a tad more entertaining with each chuckle.

From the snappy and hilarious to the drawn-out and rib-tickling, there’s a zombie joke for every mood and moment.

So next time you’re watching a zombie flick or reading a horror novel, remember, there’s humor to be unearthed in every shambling step, groan, and brain-craving moment.

Keep spreading the laughs, and let the good times shamble and groan.

Because after all, a day without laughter is like a day without zombies—unthinkable and, frankly, a bit less thrilling.

Happy joking, everyone!

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